Chapter Six

Seven Devils

Turns out, everything wasn't entirely true. Almost everything would have been a more accurate statement.

It was like I had nothing but Negan, and then, when I wasn't even focusing on how much shit I couldn't remember, it was all there. I remembered my childhood, my family. I remembered high school and college and working for the CIA and even the beginning of the end of the world.

What I stumbled on, as I sifted through my memories, was what I was before. Who I was before. It planted a seed of doubt in my mind as I stared at Negan from across the couch.

"Piper Black, sir. Science, Technology, and Weapons Analyst. Nice to meet you."

The sentence popped into my head, followed by a memory of me meeting the President of the United States.

Is that why Negan wanted me around? Because I could provide what was one of the most important resources in this new world? A means to end quite literally anything that threatened him. Did I have these doubts about him before? Before I fell off a building and broke my whole ass brain?

Negan's eyes squinted as he tried to read the emotions that were crossing my face at a rapid pace.

"Everything, huh?" He asked, keeping his position on the couch relaxed and comfortable, but his eyes trained on me.

I made a decision then and there. I didn't know if it was the right one, but it was the one I felt like I could live with right now. Just from the brief memories I did have of Negan, I pieced together that he definitely knew what I was capable of. What I could build, what I could destroy. And I couldn't put it in words, but from the way he was staring at me, I knew he was hiding something. The realization that it was almost like he didn't want me to remember who I was slammed into me. He would get my honesty when I got his.

I plastered a fake, excited smile to my face.

"Almost everything! Negan, I remember my parents! My brother! My childhood, my home! I remember it!" I put an excited tilt to my voice, my hands fluttering in front of me.

I watched his face, gathering any cue that he was doubting what I was telling him, but he just smiled easily at me, in what appeared to be a genuine way. Genuine until I noticed the way his eyes pinched at the corner before going back to normal.

"That's fucking great, wildflower. Doc did say your memories would start coming back, right? At what point do they start to fade again?" He asked, keeping his smile.

Two can play this game, good sir.

"Like, right after high school, I think. I remember graduation and getting everything ready with mom to go to college and…" I trailed off as horror finally set in.

I felt it. Panic attack two coming to knock on my door. I took slow breaths.

"Negan, what happened to them? My family. What happened to them?"

His eyes stayed on mine and I could see him flinch.

"Doll…" He breathed as he ran his hands over face. "I don't know if this is something we need to talk about right now."

I stood up from the couch, my heart rate finally reaching a rate that had to put me at risk of having a fucking stroke.

"Negan, so help me fucking god. You tell me what happened to them right fucking now. I need you to take off your kid gloves and tell what happened to them before I go absolutely feral on you," I demanded, the anxiety warring with the anger I felt that he kept avoiding talking about anything that was important.

I watched him as he stared at me. I could see the internal conflict as he tried to find the words. He let out another sigh, shook his head, and sat up, placing his elbows on his knees. Hurt flashed in his eyes before they hardened and he looked back up at me.

"Wildflower, they were murdered. The same day that you… fell. Off the roof." His eyes closed on the last word and he didn't lift them back to mine.

I just stood there, eyes locked on the man in front of me, but not really seeing him.

A memory played out in front of me like an old school film reel. My mom, sitting at our kitchen table, holding a cup of coffee. Her head was thrown back in a laugh as my dad continued telling her one of his really terrible jokes. He watched her with such intensity, loving when my mom laughed. My brother was shoveling cereal into his face and he looked up at me, where I was sitting on our kitchen counter, and rolled his eyes as a small smile pulled his lips up.

My eyes focused and Negan was watching me, concern pulling his face tight.

"Who?" I whispered, the word coming out broken and raw.

"Piper, I don't - "

"God damn it, Negan. Fucking tell me!" I yelled, stomping my food at the same time.

"Brendan. It was fucking Brendan."

I tiled my head at him.

"The leader? From Purcellville?" I asked, remembering the first time that I had met Negan and that name popping up.

"Yes." Negan kept his responses short and clipped.

"How?"

"He lined them up and shot them. In front of you."

I felt my knees shake. I dropped to the couch, pulling my knees up to my chest again. My eyes went unfocused as tears sprang to my eyes.

I felt a numbness settle over me. A bone chilling, deep lack of feeling snaked its way through my body, burrowing into every cell. The anxiety faded, the gut wrenching sadness dissipated.

I could hear Negan say my name. I felt him touch my arm and gently shake me. But nothing permeated the wall I had built in my mind.

At some point, Negan must have put me in his bed, as I felt the warmth of the blanket around me and the fluffy pillows under my head. I laid there, staring into the darkness, willing my heart to just stop beating.

Negan

I'd seen her shut down. I'd seen the moment her eyes went blank and there was no sense of recognition behind her eyes. No awareness of anything happening around her.

I'd laid her in the bed and paged the doctor, who had given me the most useless information in the history of fucking ever.

"She's just in shock, Negan. That was a significant amount of information you dropped on her directly after she had regained her memories of those people. Let her rest. I'll check on her in the morning."

So, I let her rest, staying close, watching her for any sign of fucking anything and got a whole lot of not shit.

Three fucking days. It took three whole fucking days of forcing water down her throat and putting food in her mouth, watching her chew on instinct. There was nothing. And that was more terrifying than having her wake up with no memories.

On the third day, she moved a little, rolling to her side and curling in on herself. I shot up from the table in the corner where I had the pleasure of going through the bullshit inventory lists the kitchen had provided.

I started moving towards the bed when the sound came. The most heart wrenching sobs I had ever heard leaving her throat as her body shook. I felt my lip start to curl in horror before making my face chill the fuck out. I'd never been particularly good with crying people. I gave myself an internal scolding, before reminding myself that I had calmed her panic attacks before and was pretty fucking good at it.

Just treat it like a panic attack.

So I crawled into the bed behind her and slipped my arms around her, pulling her back into my chest. This seemed to make her cry harder, not that it seemed possible, but she didn't push me away, so I'd check that as a win for today.

She cried for hours, clutching my hand to her chest, as I whispered anything I could to console her.

Eventually, sleep took her. I never moved, for reasons unknown to me. I listened to her breathing and stayed wrapped around her.

The next morning came and Piper was still asleep when I was pulled awake by a loud knocking at the front door. I carefully untangled myself from her and made my way across the bedroom.

Glancing back at her, I again noticed how beautiful she looked when she was sleeping. So peaceful, a stark difference from when she was typically awake and running that big ass mouth.

I shook my head, feeling like an asshole for about five seconds after remembering that she was living through her personal version of hell for the second time.

At least this time she didn't end up freefalling through the fucking air.

Finally reaching the door through my office, I swung it open with the pure annoyance of someone who got ripped out of sleep against his will.

"What the fuck do you want, Simon? Someone better be dead or dying for me to see your ugly mug this early in the fucking morning," I grumbled as I stepped out of the doorway and ushered him.

"Ah, I see you woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed today." His tone was too cheerful and I wanted to physically harm him at that moment.

"What. Do. You. Want."

I shut the door behind him, quieter than I wanted to, so I didn't wake up Piper, and walked across the room to flop in the chair at my desk.

"How's she doing?" Simon asked, sitting across from me.

I sighed and shook my head.

"Not very fucking well, considering. She cried last night. Finally fucking moved, so I'll take it."

Simon let a loud breath go through his mouth.

"Well, on that note, Brendan's finally made a fucking appearance. We caught him leaving Purcellville with some of his men. I have someone following them now." He said, crossing his legs in front of him.

"What direction are they heading?"

"East. Possibly towards DC, but they don't have enough trucks or people for me to think it's a supply run. If it is, they're going for something real fucking specific." Simon answered, still looking at me, waiting for some kind of direction.

I nodded my head, rolling the information over. From what I knew about that insufferable prick so far, it was likely he was going to meet someone. He had relationships with a few of the other communities surrounding us. All of those being under the guise of friendship and trading. No one else knew what he was doing. The other communities who had been smart enough to fucking question him had been decimated in the process.

If people thought I was the biggest asshole to emerge when the dead started rising, they hadn't met that douche yet. He made me look like a God damned Care Bear. Yeah, there was a few communities I had under my thumb that provided supplies to the Sanctuary, but I tried not to fuck with them too much, as long as they stayed on schedule. If someone said something that made me question their fucking morals, when mine weren't exactly stellar, that was a giant red fucking flag.

"Watch them. I want to know who they're meeting. Who they have trade routes with, who the leaders of those communities are, and if they have anything of fucking value."

"Aye aye, Captain," Simon responded, looking slightly uncomfortable for a second before deciding to open his mouth again, "Does she know everything?"

I shook my head. "No, and I won't be the one to fucking tell her."

Simon threw his hands up for a second, looking fed up with my shit. Which surprisingly, just made me laugh.

"You need to tell her, Negan. She's going to be pissed if you keep this shit from her, and I think we both know how this shit ended up last time."

I cocked my head to the side and raised an eyebrow.

"I'm going to need you, Simon, to reign it the fuck in. She'll know when she knows. Not before, not after. Her memories are already starting to come back and doc says everything will return at some point. Now, unless you have other bullshit you'd like to discuss, I think it's as good a time as any for you to get the fuck out of here."

Simon rolled his eyes as he stood, but I completely ignored the gesture, not in the mood to deal with his shit.

He started toward the door, but stopped halfway there and turned around.

"Negan, they're still hanging outside the gates. Her parents. I… I just wanted to let you know," he whispered, before nodding his head once and leaving my room.

The second the door clicked shut, I dropped my head back and looked up at the ceiling.

I had a psychopath running rampant around the East coast, a broken girl who couldn't remember a single fucking important thing, a Second in Command who thought he was the new Dr. Phil, and a headache that was making me want to pound my head on the desk. Everything is fucking awesome.

My head jerked up when I heard a soft breath come from in front of me.

Piper stood directly in front of my desk, looking ready to rip someone's head off. And fuck if that didn't turn me on.

Her blonde hair was a mass of curls hanging around her head. She was still wearing one of my t-shirts and it was fucking swallowed her small frame.

"How the fuck did you get over here without making a sound?" I asked, trying to shake the thought of how absolutely fucking delicious she looked in my shirt.

"He's still alive." It was a statement, not a question.

Fuck. She heard the entire conversation.

"He is. For now." I responded, looking at her with an eyebrow raised.

"I'm going to kill him." Her tone was harsh and her eyes swam with a rage that tickled my fucking balls.

"You will, but not today, Wildflower."

Her hands slammed on my desk, rattling everything sitting on top of it.

"You don't get to fucking tell me what to do. I want you to take me to him and I want you to do it now."

Oh, she is spicy this morning.

"I won't be doing that, doll. You still don't remember everything. You need rest. And I need to figure out what his next plan is and who the fuck is helping him so I can shut that shit down across the board. You hear me?" I smirked up at her, because while I did love that she was ready to ride into war and fuck shit up, she was going to remember real quick that demands with me didn't typically work out all too well.

She charged around the desk and I just watched, wondering what she thought she was going to do.

She grabbed my chin in her small hand and jerked my face so close to hers that I could smell her, and damn if it didn't shoot straight to my dick.

"I remember enough, you giant fucking twat. I remember what the fuck I can do. I remember the end of the world, and, as of this morning, remember that motherfucker and what he was forcing me to do for him. It's the most recent shit that I'm having a hard time with right now. So, if you don't want to get off your throne today, that's fine. But you will find me the supplies I need and you will take me to him at some point in the real near fucking future. Because I will be the last thing he fucking sees before I burn him down."

She breathed the words out, the calm of her voice contrasting with how hard she was squeezing my chin.

I looked into her eyes. She was lying. She remembered all of it. Every single thing. But she didn't want to tell me that, for some reason. I could see the fire in her. I knew that fire, had loved getting burned by the heat of it since I'd met her. And that blue flame would only rear up to go completely scorched earth if she knew everything that had happened to her.

Deciding against calling her out on it, I smirked again, knowing how much she hated it.

"Your wish is my command, wildflower. Now, remove your hand from my chin before I fucking make you."