Thank you for reading and reviewing! you guys are the best!
I needed to write a Jess bday chapter. It was bothering me that we celebrated Rory's and not his. speaking of birthdays, I am going on vacation for mine later this month (me and Milo are the same sign, that means we are super compatible and would totally be together if he weren't married, right?! right? please indulge me for my birthday). anyway, I should have another chapter to you before I leave, but if not you will get it as soon as I'm back as it's almost done. just wanted to let you lovely readers know!
Rated M Scene ahead
enjoy xoxo
disclaimer: I own nothing
Jess wakes slowly one morning to light, warm touches on his body. His skin prickles delightfully as he is pulled from restful sleep and a pleasant dream. The sleeping movie in his mind of taking Rory and their children to a carnival fades, just as he was about to attempt to win his little girl a stuffed animal. The picture of her, looking like a perfect combination of him and Rory with her auburn hair and his almost golden eyes (but, surprisingly to him, a smile like Lorelai's), stays imprinted on his eyelids as he becomes conscious. The other he didn't get a good look at, because she was smaller and glued to Rory's arms. But he felt a love for them that follows him into wakefulness; his heart feeling full and ready to give his family anything they want. Including a stuffed dolphin at the carnival.
However, as his eyes finally open, the scene before him looks like it is about to be much more X-rated. Rory smiles at him from her position between his legs, where she has just trailed kisses from his chest downwards. He takes a breath through his nose and smirks. She places her hands at the band of his shorts.
"Good morning, birthday boy," she mumbles coyly, tugging until he lifts his hips off the bed so she can pull his shorts down.
"Seems like it's going to be a good morning indeed," he murmurs back, moving his legs around to help her get his clothes off, "sweet dreams and a sexy wakeup call. My birthday could end after this for all I care."
She grins wide before leaning down to place soft kisses up his thighs.
"What did you dream about? Marilyn Monroe singing happy birthday to you, Mr. President?"
He shakes his head and brings a hand to her hair to run his fingers through it.
"No, we were at a carnival with two children. Ours, I believe, since there were no other adults in our group and the older of the two looked like us. She was maybe five or six, and the other was small enough to not want to leave your arms. We ate cotton candy, held hands and went through one of those funhouses. But there weren't any words exchanged, except right before waking up our older daughter asked me to try and win her a stuffed animal. It all felt very…nice. Warm and happy."
Rory has paused her movements and looks up at him with big eyes, a touched look on her face.
"That sounds so sweet. I wish I could see it."
He touches her face, "one day you will."
Her heart dances.
"Did you win the stuffed animal?"
"I didn't get a chance to try."
"What was the game?"
"Hitting balloons with darts."
She smiles, "I think you would've won."
"I had a plan to bribe the attendant for the stuffed dolphin if I didn't win. That was my last thought before waking up."
"Stuffed dolphin? That's so adorable, Jess."
"It was all adorable. But, for now, it was just a dream," he runs a finger from her hair to her lips and smirks, "I'm currently much more excited for reality."
She takes a second, wanting another moment to bask in the fuzzy feelings from the picture he's painted.
Then her face turns mischievous before she traces her tongue along his erection. He groans and threads his fingers in her hair again. She repositions herself and leans down, taking him quickly and deeply in her mouth.
"Oh baby," he moans and holds her head in place, "can we go slow? I'm feeling extra sensitive this morning. Need to last long enough to get inside you."
He sees the blush creep up her cheeks as she bobs her head in confirmation, then moves slowly up and down as he requested. He hums in pleasure, leaning his head back against his pillow. The heat of her mouth envelopes him completely, the infrequent but delicious sounds from her tongue and throat have him buzzing in ecstasy. He takes a breath and looks back down at her after some time, heart thumping as his eyes meet hers. They're wide as a full moon, looking enthralled by his reactions to her, and blue as the sky.
"Such a beautiful birthday gift," he mumbles, fingers lovingly stroking her head. The side of her mouth moves up as she dips her head down on him. One of her hands moves from his leg, smoothing over the muscles on his stomach, then tracing his hip and one of the hard v lines that she loves so much. He watches with trembling curiosity as she moves her hand down further and releases an uncontrollable moan as her fingers dance over the delicate skin of his balls. She removes him slowly from her mouth, all the while still caressing the sensitive area. He meets her wide eyes again, and the hesitant look of excitement he sees in them multiplies the pleasure.
"Does that feel good?" she asks, voice hushed and inquisitive. He nods repeatedly, breaths becoming shorter.
"So fucking good, Rory. Oh my god," he groans as she gently glides her nails over him. She bites her lip before taking him back in her mouth again, while continuing her careful scratches. The combined sensations of her mouth and her hand have his senses transporting to wild heights. And the fact that she was willing to try, and excited to find a new way to blow his mind, has him way too close to the edge.
"Fuck Rory," he grunts loudly, yanking gently on her hair, "baby, this is incredible but I'm going to explode. Come up here, please."
She pulls away, and asks sweetly, "what's wrong with that? We can have sex later. It's your birthday, it's all about you."
He shakes his head, the look on his face heavy and lustful, "come here."
It's a pleading sort of command, and it's a tone that easily hits her below the belly button. She climbs off the bed for a moment to strip down. Jess hurriedly kicks the covers sitting near his feet completely off the bed and sits up slightly to put an extra pillow behind his head and upper back. He beckons her to his lap, and she climbs on, straddling him. He pulls her upper body to him, kissing her neck as his hands then glide down to her behind to line them up. He takes small bites as he slides inside, and he feels the moan in her throat against his lips. He wraps his arms around her, pulling her closer to him. She rests her arms around his neck, twisting her fingers in his dark hair. He pulls her tighter, bending his knees just enough to rock in and out of her without her needing to move her body at all. Her lips find his shoulder as she bows her head down, humming against him between kisses on his skin. Their chests are pressed together, the hair on his pecs adding an arousing textural layer as it rubs against her hard nipples. His arms stay wrapped around her middle, holding her comfortingly close while he takes her at a passionate pace. A melody of their shaky breaths and deep moans surrounds them as Jess rhythmically grinds in and out, moving his hips in a way that causes a titillating friction against her throbbing bundle of nerves. He takes his time, and it pays off deliciously as overwhelming pleasure radiates through their bodies at the same moment. She gasps in sweet delight against his neck, her body trembling in his arms as waves of euphoria rock through her. While his arms hold her steady, his own body is a shaking mess beneath her as he succumbs to his own completion inside of her. They stay like that, bodies pressed together, for a few minutes to catch their breath and enjoy the moment.
Finally, Rory pushes herself up, face hovering over his with a content smile. He matches her look and moves a hand to push the hair out of her face.
"I think that's the first time we've done that."
Her eyebrow raises, "that's definitely not the first time we've done that."
"Not sex itself silly," Jess laughs, leaning up to kiss her on the nose, "finishing at the same exact time. Usually it's you first and then your body squeezes it out of me."
"Graphic," she blushes and nods, "but you're right. That's nice."
"It's more than nice. Some people will never get to experience that. It practically requires a full stellar alignment."
"What a beautiful way to think about it," she smiles softly, "I guess that's the cosmos wishing you a happy birthday."
"Maybe. Or just showing their support for you and me. Probably big fans of us."
She grins happily, "I like that idea. Having the universe behind us sounds pretty promising."
He smiles and looks over her face, "have you ever experienced that with someone before?"
She looks back at him, unsure if he seriously wants to discuss it. But she doesn't find any ulterior meanings other than genuine curiosity.
"I don't think so," she shakes her head, "honestly, it took a long time before I ever had one during sex. I didn't know that other people didn't know, or didn't care I guess, how to make that happen. And I was quite shy about that type of thing when I was young, as I'm sure you would expect. So it took time to get comfortable advocating for myself."
He listens to her words, appreciating her openness and honesty with him about a subject that once would have been uncomfortable for her to discuss.
"If they didn't know, they should have at least been asking what feels good for you," he kisses her face, "That's disappointing. I'm sorry. You deserved better."
She shrugs, and gives him a smile, "it's okay. You've more than made up for that loss. I have probably had enough orgasms to last a lifetime by now."
"And many more to come. Pun intended," his smirk is big and proud, "so, I guess Dean was just as unskilled as I had pegged him to be."
She tries not to laugh at that, "He…was definitely inexperienced. But so was I. And it didn't help that we had to sleep together in weird places because, you know, I ruined his marriage and he had to move back in with his parents. And I lived in a dorm room with Paris."
"Oh you did not ruin his marriage. He did. He shouldn't have got married that young in the first place, in my opinion."
"I felt the same way and told him so when he first told me about it," she adds quietly, "He said that I was being mean because you were treating me poorly. And I told him you weren't, that I really thought his marriage was a bad idea. But he didn't appreciate my advice."
"Jesus," his face screws up, "how many times did people in that town use my 'bad behavior' to judge and manipulate you? Such bullshit."
"It was a long time ago. Don't let it get to you. I don't. I knew you for who you really were."
His face relaxes and he gives her a grateful smile.
"Thank you. Dean was the idiot who wrecked his marriage. Not you. You know that, right?"
She shrugs, and her face turns contemplative, "Marriage is a funny thing, isn't it? It's supposed to be this meaningful commitment, to stay together forever. But it seems it can break pretty easily."
He looks at her, hearing the words she's not saying, and replies seriously, "It isn't always like that, Rory. They don't always fall apart. If it's right, it can work. Like Luke and your mom. Lane and Zack. Sookie and Jackson. Matt and Chris with their wives. Your grandparents. There are plenty of good examples out there."
"Even my grandparents separated at one point. It was…a strange time. It was difficult and confusing for me to understand, you know?"
He squeezes her leg, "I get it, but clearly they stayed together."
"Yeah. They did," she nods reluctantly, "They reconciled and had a vow renewal. It was beautiful, except my grandmother inviting my dad to purposely mess with mom and Luke. Which ended up causing them to break up for a while. That part was horrible. Mom was devastated."
"Ah," Jess makes a sound of recognition, "I didn't realize these events were connected. Luke was fucked up too. He actually came down to New York to talk to me. Of course, being Luke, he had to beat around the bush about it, so I only got bits and pieces of the story."
"Really?"
"Yes. And I told him the same thing he told me after I got that black eye and screwed up dinner with your grandmother: it's a package deal. The overbearing parents, Christopher, ridiculous dinners and parties. It comes with Lorelai. I also said, in my opinion, it's worth it to put up with all of that."
Her body softens, "That's sweet. Luke told you I'm a package deal?"
"Yeah. He basically said I needed to get it together if I really want to be with you. I needed to be willing to deal with all parts of you."
"Well, you do an incredible job of that. Like opening a business with my Grandmother, for example."
He smirks, "It's much easier now without that chip on my shoulder."
She smiles and kisses him. He matches her smile and then his eyebrow raises in thought.
"He was worried about you too, now that I think about it. Am I remembering correctly that you got caught in the act by Luke? And yelled at him from a limo?"
Her cheeks tint in embarrassment.
"Yes, but those were separate occasions! Days apart, if not a week! And I wasn't caught in the act, we were just making out."
"Uh huh, and the limo?"
"Logan loaned it to me…my car was in the shop. And my mom was depressed. I needed to get to Stars Hollow! It's not because I thought I was Mariah Carey or something."
Jess rolls his eyes, "Of course he loaned you a limo. All of his gifts are about as unpretentious and subtle as his ego."
She shoots him a look and goes to reply but he stops her.
"Hey, it's my birthday, remember? Can I be judgmental of your exes just for today?"
His words unravel any defense she had, and she laughs.
"Okay. That's fair."
"Great. You know what, the limo thing makes sense when you consider his obsession with length. Any chance I can get you to tell me if he was trying to compensate for something?"
She crosses her arms and glares at him. He rolls his lips to keep from laughing at her annoyed look.
She huffs and says, "It wasn't world record worthy in either direction."
"That tells me nothing."
She shrugs with a clever smile, "that was the idea."
"Wow, what a smart ass you have," he teases, giving her bottom a light slap, "and on my birthday of all days."
"You love it."
"Of course I do," he confirms easily, "and what about the vow renewal? Doesn't seem like a convenient time for a private make out session. Guessing that's why Luke was concerned."
She sighs, "don't forget that this was a long time ago, okay?"
His look turns wary, but he nods.
"I was frustrated that Logan seemed to like me but wouldn't make a move on me - because he didn't think I was the kind of girl that wanted to casually mess around. I mean, he turned out to be right, but at the time I wanted to be seen differently. He…was the first person that really caught my attention after you."
Jess keeps his face straight, because he knows he asked and that it's in the past. And she wants to share, so he wants to listen.
"I was wanting to be this mysterious, uncaring college girl. That doesn't need to be in a relationship and is fine with casual interactions. So I wanted to hook up with him, because I thought that would help me succeed at being that girl. I kinda forced him into sneaking away at the party, and then not only Luke, but also my dad found us with…our clothes a mess and kissing."
He takes a breath and offers her a small smile, "Okay", and not wanting to ponder too much on the thought of Rory like that, he asks, "but the vow renewal was nice?"
A nostalgic smile takes over her face.
"It was beautiful. It was moving to see their love for each other back and stronger than ever."
He smiles softly, "See? Not all marriages fall apart. And even when they do, sometimes they can be put back together."
She regards him.
"It's surprising to me, in a good way, that you have a strong belief in it."
"I…", he starts, thinking of how to explain himself, "yeah. I know what you mean by surprising. But being around it, with Matt and Chris, changed my perspective. I've seen it working beautifully. And people are responsible for having a good marriage, same as having a good relationship. Marriage itself isn't scary, it's the instability of a relationship. Like Dean and…whatshername. Lindsay. Or like…your mom and dad. Or Luke and that lawyer he married for a hot second. Those people weren't meant to be together."
She bites her lip in thought and nods after a moment.
"You believe in us."
"I do," his response is quick and certain. Then, to lighten the moment he adds, "our physical relationship alone could sustain us. But we happen to have the rest of it down too, I think."
She chuckles and smiles down at him.
"So, speaking of our physical relationship…had I somehow lost my virginity to you…" Rory starts, looking at him expectantly. Her implied question makes him smirk.
"Of course you would have had an orgasm. Or two. Maybe even three. That's all I wanted to do to you. I wanted to make you crazy. I knew what I was doing, at least with my hands, by age sixteen. It would not have been an issue."
She gapes, "that's so young to be experienced."
"Not a lot of supervision in my life then," he shrugs.
She softens and nods in understanding.
"And anyway, I read Lady Chatterley's Lover before I was thirteen. So I had an idea that sex didn't necessarily work the same for guys and girls."
She smiles wide, "sex education from literature. That makes so much sense for you."
He laughs, "yeah, I guess it does."
"And have you ever…had that happen with someone else?" she cautiously asks, looking over his face. His lips curve slightly, and he shakes his head.
"Nope. Just you."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yes. Though I suppose it could have happened and I don't remember, so it obviously didn't mean what it means to me now."
She nods, "it's okay either way. Just curious."
He holds her face with both hands now and kisses her head.
"It's nice to talk like this. To be at this stage together," Jess murmurs thoughtfully, "trusting and comfortable with each other."
"It is," she agrees, voice quiet, "it feels very secure. You and me."
"It is."
She leans forward to capture his lips, giving him a hard kiss to punctuate the end of these heavier topics. He grunts quietly as he pulls himself into a more properly seated position, dragging her weight with him.
"Thank you for that amazing wakeup call. Your tricks just keep getting better and better, sex kitten."
"Well, I was feeling very inspired," her lips curl into a playful smile, "I'm sleeping with the sexiest thirty-six year old man alive, you know."
"Huh. You sure about that? I think I just saw somewhere that Henry Cavill turned thirty-six this year."
She goes to argue and then asks, "where and how in the world would you have read that?"
He shrugs, "Magazine cover while waiting in line at the grocery store."
"Wow, even Jess Mariano can't look away from a trashy magazine," she teases him, "but, yes. I am sure you're the sexiest thirty-six year old man alive. Henry Cavill is too tall."
He gives her a look, "said no woman ever."
"No, no. You're the perfect height. You have the perfect muscles. You're smart, you write books, you run your own business. You've got that perfectly messy hair thing down. And don't even get me started on your voice!" she fans herself; Jess tries in vain to stop from grinning at her over dramatics, "But most importantly, you have the sexiest mouth. Just accept it. The title is yours. It does come with a lot of responsibility though."
With a laughing smile he asks, "Like what?"
"Well, you really need to be careful with your charm. You can't just go around getting people's hopes up when you aren't even close to being single."
"Uh huh, dilute the charm. Got it."
"And you also can't be too mean, because then you'll give hot people a bad name."
"I'm not sure I can tame the scowl. That's asking a lot."
"Lastly," she continues, ignoring his comment, "don't go using that beautiful smile of yours on fertile women for too long. I would say ten seconds max. Otherwise, I truly think it has the power to miraculously impregnate someone."
He erupts into boisterous laughter, his body shaking beneath her. Her heart warms and she can't help but laugh with him.
"You're off your rocker. If that were true, don't you think you would be pregnant by now?"
"Well, I'm on birth control so I'm protected from its powers," she reasons with a shrug, "Also, if it did happen I highly doubt it could be attributed solely to your smile…"
"Ah, but doesn't the smile often lead to those activities?"
She grins wide, "yes it does. So, I'm right after all."
"No, no. You have yet to fairly test your hypothesis," he quips, holding her at the hips and rubbing his thumbs along her lower belly. She finds it difficult not to smile at his implication.
"Don't worry, the theory will be tested thoroughly once I'm ready."
He takes a steadying breath and pulls her face down to his for a gentle kiss.
"That's going to be fun," he whispers, then releases her face and squeezes her thighs that still straddle him, "speaking of fun, what do you have planned for my birthday?"
"How do you know I have anything planned? You don't like your birthday," she asks, maneuvering off of his lap and out of bed.
"No, but you do," he argues, watching her step into the bathroom. He hears her turn on the bath tub. She steps back out, lips giving away the start of an excited smile.
"I do! Okay. First, we will take a nice, romantic bath. Then, I'm going to take you for coffee and breakfast. And after we will go to your favorite non-Truncheon book store and I'm going to buy you any book you want. Then we will go to the park and read our books and definitely get ice cream. Then we can do whatever you want until dinner time, I have reservations booked somewhere nice but not too nice because I know you don't like those places."
He whistles, "phew. Big day ahead. And no surprise visitors will be joining us?"
She shakes her head, "nope. Don't forget that I know you well. All of our plans today are just you and me. Now, next weekend on the other hand, I may be taking you to Stars Hollow for a little family celebration."
He sighs but smiles genuinely at her.
"Thank you. I'm always over the moon to spend the day with you."
She grins and walks over to the bed, pulling on his hand to follow her to the bath.
"There is one more surprise."
"Jeez, you're a magician with all you've managed to fit into one day," he teases, awaiting look on his face as he watches her put her hair in a messy bun. She smiles slyly and leans over to add more bubbles to the bath tub.
"Well?"
"Well," she turns to him, arms wrapped around her middle, "I know he's problematic, and I know he notoriously cancels shows at the last minute, but I thought we'd give old Morrissey a try. He's performing in Midtown tonight. Allegedly."
Jess's face perks up in unfeigned excitement, "He is problematic, but the music is too good to miss it. You're the best, Rory. Thank you for planning all this."
He wraps his arms around her and gives her a hard kiss. He feels her lips twist in a smile against his own.
"Just want you to have a great birthday," she states before turning to carefully get in the tub. His eyes watch in content enjoyment as the curves of her figure gradually disappear under the water. She looks up at him expectantly and he slowly follows her in. He snuggles up close to her, kissing the side of her head before repositioning her to sit in his lap.
"I'm just happy that you're home with me. The only gift I really wanted."
She smiles softly at him, "Me too. They've been extra flexible with my schedule ever since the Felix thing."
He scoffs quietly, "as they should be. They fucked up and didn't properly vet him."
"They hired him from a company, so I think it was technically their responsibility to do that."
"Whatever. I can't believe they put you in the hands of someone with multiple harassment accusations. I'll forever be livid, and I still think you should sue them or ask for a raise or something."
She kisses the corner of his scowl.
"It's disappointing. But I have faced, and will have to face, scarier things than Felix in my line of work."
"That's different. Those are risks that you've consented to and are prepared to deal with. Sticking you in another country, alone with a predator, is putting you in unnecessary and invisible danger."
"Oh, I would hardly call him a predator," she kisses his lips, "besides, I'm not scared anymore. He was suspended by his company until he completes thorough counseling. He won't be bothering me or hopefully anyone else."
He takes a breath as he regards her, "I know. But I think he's getting off too easy. It was hard seeing you paranoid. And you had those nightmares."
"They only lasted a couple weeks. You took good care of me, and I feel normal again. It's all good, Jess."
The side of his mouth lifts, and he gives her a gentle kiss.
"Another priceless birthday gift."
They sit at a bar nearby the theater the concert is supposed to take place. Waiting with drinks for closer to the start time of the show. Rory takes a sip of a cold beer, bringing her hand to her warm face once she places it back down on the bar. Jess watches her with a small smirk and takes a sip of his own drink.
"I swear I got sunburnt at the park today. Feel my face again."
His smirk grows, but he does as she says simply because he wants to touch her, "We were there for all of ten minutes."
"I know, I'm sorry about that. I didn't plan for that kind of heat."
"In July?"
"I was hoping for a nice breeze!"
He rubs his thumb across her cheek before lowering his hand.
"Your face is warm, but it could just be the alcohol. We can pick up aloe on our way home later if you want just in case."
"That would be a good idea if you don't mind. I just don't want my skin to get all gross looking," she makes a face, sipping her beer again. He looks over her with a smile, admiring her peach colored sundress and the gold necklace she always wears around her neck now. Her long hair is twisted up in a clip and he can see small gold earrings that match the necklace he gave her.
"Nothing about you has ever looked gross. Highly doubt it would start now."
Her glossy mouth spreads into a teasing grin, "what about when I came home from South America last Spring with a stomach infection? I was so dehydrated and disgusting for days."
"Yes, the one time you decided to drink water, it had to be tap water in Peru. I remember that well," he gives her a look.
"I had a horrible headache and needed to take an ibuprofen. I wasn't thinking."
"Weren't you there to write about the injustices of not having equitable access to clean water?"
"Hey, remember the headache? It was very loud. Wasn't thinking of much else."
"Sure. Anyway, I still would not have described you as gross or disgusting. And if you were, I didn't notice because I was too busy stressing out over your wellbeing."
"You made me drink so much Gatorade. I still haven't had a Gatorade since then. Not sure I ever will again," she grimaces at the memory.
"You needed the electrolytes. Ginger ale does not give you that, sorry."
"Okay, but there had to have been other options than Gatorade. A girl can only drink so much."
"You would have liked other options even less. I catered your recovery plan to your twisted palate the best that I could, I promise."
She makes a face, "Oh I just remembered the applesauce. You gave me a lot of applesauce too. But it was sugar free!"
He rolls his eyes, "it was not sugar free, there's no such thing. Apples have sugar in them. It was no sugar added, and that was an accident. I meant to buy you the sickly sweet kiddie stuff."
"Well, all applesauce is ruined for me now."
"Sorry about that," he pats her leg, "I made you chicken and rice soup too. Did you at least like that?"
"Oh, yeah. That was good. I would eat that again any time," she grins, and noticing the time on one of the televisions she takes out her phone, "show is supposed to start soon. I should check my email before we go."
Jess nods and takes his own phone out of his pocket to check for any Truncheon related emails. He peruses his inbox, ignoring emails from authors he is editing for. He knows from experience that it's best to let them email him multiple times before giving it a look, as usually they are constantly updating their work and sending new versions. In the beginning of his career as an editor, he would work on stuff immediately only to find that often by the time he finished editing, a revised version had been sent that looked nothing like his copy. It caused him to start a bonfire of useless manuscripts more than once in the alley behind the store.
He sees an email that gives him pause. He opens it and starts reading to himself, excitement growing in his chest with a smile on his face to match. He's been working on it since May with Matt and Chris and didn't expect to get this news so soon. In a moment, everything he's gone through in the last eight months is bathed in light. It wasn't for nothing; its purpose was beyond him, and he can see that now.
He looks up just as Rory looks at him, her face looking the complete opposite of his.
"He really canceled the show! Half an hour before showtime. Due to 'inclement weather'. The freaking show is inside! What a diva!" she slows down her tirade as she notices the look on his face, "why are you smiling like that?"
He is speechless for a moment and shakes his head in shock.
"Truncheon got approved as an affiliate to the program I did that workshop for," the words come out in happy disbelief. His eyes are wide, his mouth open slightly in wonder and lips forming an amazed grin. Rory places her hand on her heart, feeling all of his happy energy so deeply. She matches his look of astonishment as he continues.
"Starting in fall, these high school students will have the option to intern with us after school and weekends for college credits. And we'll pay them too, of course. They'll be able to start on their future with us, so they don't get off track once school is over, doing something they actually give a fuck about. And I know I've never been big on higher education, but if that's what any of them want, they deserve to be able to access it easily. Or at least get a fair start. And if they don't want to go on to college, we could always keep them and help them grow. This is just…amazing news."
Her eyes mist at his uninhibited passion and excitement. She leans over and hugs him tightly.
"That's amazing, Jess! Congratulations," she squeezes and pulls away, but holds one of his hands in hers, "I'm so freaking proud of you. And Matt and Chris. You are doing incredible things."
"Thank you. I'm…proud of us too. You know, we started as a small group of people that had practically nothing and no one. It feels right that we continue that legacy," he takes Rory's hand in his, "thank you for encouraging me to do that workshop and for believing in me."
"This is all you, Jess. It wouldn't have happened if you didn't open up to the world in the ways that you have."
His smile softens into something meditative as he stares into her eyes.
"This is the first time since November that I feel good about publishing that book."
The statement is poignant, and Rory feels the full impact of it in her chest.
"Jess…" she whispers, eyes lovingly examining his face, "you're so beautiful right now. I love to see you like this. Happy. Proud, and excited. And…being kind to yourself."
The last words hit him hard, because he does finally feel like he can give himself some grace. He had so many moments of regret over the last eight months about publishing the book. Frustration with himself at not being able to foresee that people would know he was writing about his past, whether he told them it was fiction or not. Irritation because he felt like it all played right into the idea of him as this pitiful person that he never ever wanted to be seen as. Concern over the fact that the book inadvertently invited his father into his life. But now…he's receiving the clearest sign that it was the right thing to do. The peace it brings him is worth all of the pain.
Thunder cracking outside breaks him from his thoughts. He leans forward and kisses Rory before standing up from his bar stool.
"Guess that's the inclement weather Morrissey was talking about. Let's head home before it gets bad," he motions with his head towards the door.
Rory nods, and takes the hand that Jess holds out to her to climb off her seat.
"Okay, but we still have so much to celebrate! We have to stop for champagne on the way home!"
He smirks, "trying to get me drunk and have your way with me?"
"You know I don't have to get you drunk for that," she raises her eyebrows suggestively, then gives him a heartfelt smile, "no, we just need to celebrate. Your birthday, your achievements. Wonderful, amazing, brilliant you. You're a big deal and you're going to change the world! That deserves champagne."
"I don't know about changing the world," he laughs and then says thoughtfully, "but okay. We'll celebrate. We'll get champagne. But we're going to have to run to beat the storm. Can you handle that?"
She makes a face before nodding with a smile, "for you and champagne, I can handle anything. Let's go!"
They pass the remaining hours of the evening giddily and with pleasure. Jess making phone calls to his team, and dancing around the apartment with Rory in between. They have sex twice, once after each bottle of champagne they finish. First passionate and dirty; Rory bent over the couch with the booming sounds of a storm and expletive words of bodily worship flowing from Jess's mouth as he drives her into the cushions. The second time lazy and loving; on the floor between a window and a bookshelf. Surrounded by soothing sounds of light rain and measured moans as he takes his time feeling every soft ridge and crevice inside her.
Now they lay in bed around midnight, tired but still buzzing from drinks and a full day of celebration. Jess's body wrapped around Rory's as they lay on their sides under the covers, reminiscing over the events of the day and exchanging loving touches and kisses. As Jess yawns against the back of her head, she runs her hands down his arm that sits around her waist and asks,
"Did you have a good birthday?"
He kisses her hair, "it was a great day."
"Good. I'm sorry that Morrissey let you down."
"It's okay," he mumbles, both sleepy and slightly drunk, "he's in good company."
She stops running her fingers down his arm, "what do you mean?"
He takes a moment before responding.
"I don't know why, but I expected to hear from Jimmy."
"Oh no. Does he usually reach out on your birthday?"
"No. But I just thought…you know, since he's on his new and improved daddy campaign and all."
His words aren't bitter, as Rory would have expected them to be. They are soft, with an undertone of confusion and disappointment.
"Maybe he doesn't remember my birthday. Probably wouldn't mark such an inconsequential date on his calendar," he sighs out the words, the sound of his voice getting lower the closer he gets to sleep. It tugs at her heart.
"I'm sorry, Jess. He's an idiot."
He releases a small laugh against her shoulder but is quiet after that. His breathing evens out and she thinks he fell asleep, but moments later he untangles himself from her to lay flat on his back and murmurs,
"I'm going to memorize the birthday of every student that works with us. So I know someone will always say it to them."
Wild love for this man, and his words, surge through her. She turns on her other side to give him sweet kisses on his chest and face.
"I love that idea. And I love you. I love you more every single day we're together. I don't know how it's possible, but my heart just keeps growing."
He hums sleepily, "good, that means my plan to keep you forever is working."
She smiles and kisses him on the cheek, "You're stuck with me for eternity."
"I'm yours forever - forever and ever. Here I stand; I'm as firm as a rock."
"Hmmm. I give up."
He chuckles, "you didn't even try."
"Too tired and drunk."
"Henry James."
"The Portrait of a Lady while you're half asleep? Very impressive," she kisses his chest, "and you are as steady, strong, and stable as a rock. You're all those things to me and to others, Jess."
In his silence she adds quietly, "Nothing about your birthday or existence is inconsequential. You are so loved. And so significant to this world. Especially to me."
He finds her hand in the dark and holds it to his lips. He doesn't move it and falls asleep like that minutes later.
As soon as he is asleep, Rory is overwhelmed by the feeling that she needs to do something. She carefully gets out of bed and quietly steps out of their bedroom, walking to their shared office the next room over. She quickly finds their phones, where they leave them every night to charge. Scrolling through his contacts, she finds the number she wants and adds it to her phone. She puts his back on the charger and takes hers. Walking through the apartment, she finds her key and silently walks out down the hallway to a stairwell. She takes out her phone and is happy to see she gets service there and dials the number.
"Hello?" an uncertain sounding voice answers after multiple rings. She takes a breath. She's done something similar for a man she loved less.; she can do it again for the love of her life. With that thought, she harnesses the fight within her, and she goes off.
"Do you know when your son's birthday is?"
"...who is this?"
"Rory Gilmore. Answer my question. Do you know when your son's birthday is?"
"Rory…. Gilmore. Rory Gilmore?" he repeats her name stupidly, causing Rory to roll her eyes.
"That's what I said!"
Then it clicks, "Oh! Rory. You're dating Jess. It's nice to finally talk to you…I think."
She huffs.
"Dating Jess? I'm not dating Jess. I'm in a very serious relationship with him and have been since September 2017. That's almost two full years together! And we dated for almost a year before that. And as teenagers we dated for almost a year too. If we lived in a different state than New York, our relationship would be recognized as a common law marriage. That's how long we have been together and how serious we are about each other. So, no, I'm not "dating Jess". I'm irrevocably and eternally in love and in partnership with him. Please don't ever use such tame and unaffected language to describe what Jess and I are to each other again!"
"I'm…. sorry. I didn't realize you guys did blood rituals and such."
She scoffs.
"Are you trying to be funny? That's not funny and even if it were, it is not the time to be funny. This is serious, Jimmy!"
"Okay okay. Sorry. I didn't mean to offend. Just a little confused here."
"You're way past offending. I was offended when you flew to New York City for your anniversary and treated Jess as a potential side activity on your trip. No big deal if it happens or not, it's not the reason you're there, right?! Like going freaking kayaking or whale watching!"
"In New York?"
She ignores him, "I was more offended when you upset him while in Paris, because you don't get to ask for forgiveness you haven't worked to earn. Leaving him one message was never going to be enough. Now, I'm fully enraged by your ignorance."
"I didn't mean to upset him."
"It doesn't matter your intent, Jimmy. What matters is the impact, and he was negatively impacted by your shit. And he already had enough on his plate, but you didn't think about that did you? That you're not the only one suddenly coming out of the woodwork to make amends or discuss his private life. As little as you know about Jess, you have to have at least known that type of stuff is difficult for him."
It's quiet as he realizes he has no other defense.
"Do you know when your son's birthday is?" she asks again, in a seething whisper.
He sighs after a moment.
"By the tone of your voice, I'm assuming today. I…knew it was in July. But I'll admit I didn't know the exact date."
"That's pathetic."
"Jesus."
"It is! Even my absent father knows my birthday. And I'll tell you, I've spoken to him as many times this year as I've talked to you. You have no excuse."
She hears him take a breath.
"You got stuck with one too, huh? Cruel world."
She scoffs, "More like cruel men! But this isn't about my dad. This is about you."
"I was so young and out of it when he was born. I ran away very soon after. It's not like I've had a way to keep track of these things."
She laughs in disbelief, "you could have if you cared!"
"I can't change the past - "
"No, you can't. But now you want to have a relationship with Jess, at least that's what I've heard."
He's quiet.
"You should have found out. You should have asked."
"Who?!"
"Luke, Liz, me - anyone that cares about him! We live in the age of information, there were plenty of ways for you to get in contact with someone to ask. Social media, a simple google search for the phone number to Luke's diner, even the freaking white pages are available online now!"
"Oh sure, just put myself in harm's way."
"Yes, exactly! Now you're getting it! That's a sacrifice you are supposed to want to make as a parent."
He doesn't respond, but she can hear him sigh on the line.
"As angry as I am at you, I'm doing you a favor. Because Jess means the world to me, and he had the most amazing day today, like he deserves. You are the only letdown. Well, you and Morrissey, but we expect less from him than you."
"And how are you doing me a favor? Not flogging me publicly?"
She grunts, "ugh, god. I hate that I can see a resemblance. You Mariano's are awfully sarcastic."
"Thanks, it's on the family crest. 'Awfully Sarcastic'."
"Oh, and is the family crest as invisible as you are?."
"Ouch."
"I'm doing you a favor because it's only just past midnight here which means it's still his birthday where you are. So, you can text and call him. And play the oblivious idiot card about time zones, if you must. I'm sure it will be easy to believe."
"Jesus, you don't pull any punches do you?"
"Not when it comes to Jess."
"He's a lucky guy."
"It's not luck. It's what he deserves."
"Right."
It's silent as she waits for him to tell her that he's going to step up. She won't get off the phone until he does. It's another quiet minute before he finally speaks.
"Well…I guess I better go lick my wounds and write to my son."
"Text him and call him. Don't half ass it."
"Yes ma'am."
"Okay. Bye Jimmy."
"Bye Rory. It's…been a pleasure. I hope to meet you soon."
"Do better and you just might."
She hangs up and takes a calming breath before heading back to their apartment. She carefully unlocks the door and walks inside, being sure to lock it again. Feeling thirsty from all that champagne earlier, she stops for a small glass of cold water in the kitchen. Then she walks to the office to plug her phone back in. Just as she's about to turn away, she sees Jess's phone light up with a call from Jimmy. A much needed sigh of relief escapes her. She nods to herself, confident that she did the right thing. Finally feeling sleepy, the feelings of rage having left her empty, she treks quietly to their bedroom. She climbs into bed next to a slightly snoring Jess. She whispers another 'I love you' into the night before closing her eyes and hoping for her own sweet dreams.
Jess wakes early the next morning, with rushing thoughts of preparing for the Fall. He goes through mental lists of additional equipment they will need to obtain, figuring out schedules and who will help him train the students, etc. The minor aches in his body remind him of the booze they drank the previous night, and he decides to get up so he can have coffee and breakfast ready for Rory.
He always starts his days in their guest bathroom when Rory is home. Brushes his teeth, washes his face and shaves there so the sounds of his morning routine don't disturb her sleep. He regards himself in the mirror when he's done. His mind flashes through all the ways he could have turned out, with the type of life he had growing up. The lack of love and kindness alone could have stopped him from being able to show that to others. Could have kept him from having the wonderful relationship he has with Rory. Alcohol being so accessible to him in his early years had the potential to change the trajectory of everything. But maybe he was meant to be stronger than all of that, to be able to empower and strengthen others that are more susceptible to going sideways.
He takes a breath. He nods to himself - thankful to have made it to thirty-six without falling through the cracks. Proud to have the kind of heart that has the capacity for the amount of love he has for Rory. For Luke, for Doula. For friends and other family. And a little bit of love for himself. He is equally prideful about never giving up. He wasn't dealt the best cards, but he was hellbent on making the most of them. And now he gets to hopefully help others do the same. Because, as Rory said, he's more than qualified to assist in that endeavor. The leftover pessimist in him (from his teenage years) tries to say that maybe he's overselling the influence Truncheon will have, and it won't make any difference at all. Maybe this will be a waste of time and resources. But he won't find out until he tries. Just like Luke tried for him, and even though it took time, Luke's help did influence him for the better eventually. This realization easily silences any doubts. If he can be even half as good as Luke, it will be enough.
He leaves his reflection with a small smile of gratitude and throws on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt from a clean laundry basket. He slips shoes on and grabs his wallet and keys and decides to get his phone too. Putting his phone in his pocket, he leaves and grabs their coffee first from a local cafe, so it has time to cool down by the time he gets back. Then he walks to their favorite place for breakfast burritos and orders. While he waits for their food, he takes out his phone to check and see if Rory is up yet. As he turns the screen on, he sees Jimmy's name and does a double take. Not just a text, but two missed calls and a voicemail from around midnight. His mind is abuzz with slight confusion and instinctual mistrust. But, against his wishes, a small wave of childlike sentiment flows through his body. Slowly, he opens the text to see it is indeed a 'happy birthday' message, with a ridiculous looking David Bowie gif that makes no sense in the context. It manages to make him laugh, quickly and quietly of course. They call his name for the food, and he grabs it and decides to listen to the message on his walk home. It's exactly what he would expect from Jimmy - stating that he meant to call sooner but he had a long day at work and lost track of time but happy birthday!'. It ends in a way that Jess can tell he felt uncomfortable, because normally what does a parent say after they wish their child a happy birthday? But no, he's not brave enough yet to tell Jess he loves him. And that's fine with him, truly. It would be weird for him too. He's not there yet either. His message ends with a basic "hope you had a great day. Talk soon, bye."
But he reached out. Jimmy knows his birthday, and he made an effort, be it a late and underwhelming one. Still, an effort, nonetheless. There's an inexplicable pep in his step as he makes his way back into the apartment. It's clear that Rory is still in bed by the complete silence in their home. He drops the food in the kitchen and places his keys and wallet where they go. As he walks to the bedroom to wake her up, he hears something vibrating in the office. Figuring it's her phone, he decides to grab it for her on his way. He unplugs it from the charger, and the screen lights up for a moment. He smirks as he sees it's a text from Lorelai, asking if she can go ahead and pick the cake flavor for Jess's birthday dinner, since her 'taste is better'.
But before the screen goes black again, he sees another text underneath hers. It's an unknown number, and it says: 'thanks for the wakeup call. I called and texted him. This won't happen again.' His jaw sets and his eyes squint in suspicion. He takes out his phone and pulls up Jimmy's contact and finds that the number is a match. He huffs in disbelief and shakes his head. Of course. Of course. Why would he actually know the date of his birthday? He didn't stick around long enough for it to bear any significance on his life. And he would never care enough to figure it out on his own. Frustration builds; all pleasant feelings from the text and voicemail vanish and in its wake is a deep feeling of deception. Because all he has wanted from that man is honesty and vulnerability, and for him to keep trying even when it feels hard. Instead, it seems he took the gift that Rory gave him and acted as if it was an original thought. Even making up a storyline to go with it - busy at work all day and lost track of time. The man makes his own hours. Jess feels so foolish all of the sudden, and it's like all that Jimmy has done right in the last few months has been shadowed by this ugly truth.
Jess takes a relaxing breath, not wanting Rory to be able to read any anger on him. Because he isn't angry or frustrated with her at all. No, it feels good to have someone do something like that on his behalf. He's grateful and appreciative of her; but Jimmy's part in it does not sit well with him. He takes her phone and heads to their bedroom. She's sleeping soundly on her side, curled up in a cozy ball and facing away from where sunlight is poking out through their windows. He steps up to the bed and sits softly on its edge. His hand immediately goes to her face, gently pushing hair out of it and caressing her cheek. While his mind is racing and his gut feels heavy with coursing emotion, his heart warms as he looks at his sweet girlfriend. He thinks about how much she must care about him, making a phone call to a stranger in the middle of the night probably because she wanted to make every part of his birthday feel great. Sometimes the surrealness of getting to spend his life with this person hits him hard. This is one of those moments.
She stirs under his touch, and groans sleepily.
"Morning, beautiful," he leans forward and kisses her face, "there's a breakfast burrito and large coffee in the kitchen for you when you're ready to get up."
"Mmm," she hums, "you're the best. My head hurts."
"Drinking in our thirties is much different than our twenties, huh?"
"Uh huh. So sad."
"It is a tragedy," he concurs, holding his hand to her face again, "I, uh, brought your phone in too. I heard it go off and figured I'd bring it to you."
"Thank you, was it work?" she mumbles, rubbing her cheek against his hand. He leans forward to kiss her head again.
"No, it was Lorelai. She texted you about my birthday cake. And the answer is yes, you can let her pick the flavor. Wouldn't want her to be disappointed on my big day."
Rory chuckles sleepily, which turns into a yawn. She settles against her pillow again with her eyes closed. He decides to just ask what's on his mind, rather than waiting for her to come forward with it.
"Did you…by any chance, call Jimmy last night?" The words come out in a slow, careful mutter.
She takes a sharp breath, and her eyes shoot wide open. She looks at his face, trying to see if he's upset or not.
"Yes. I did. I'm sorry…are you mad?"
He shakes his head dismissively, "At you? No, not even a little bit. It was sweet of you to do that, and it means a lot to me."
Her features soften and she nods.
"Did he complain about me? I was pretty mean to him."
Jess smirks at that, "were you? I hope you recorded it."
"No, sorry, I was too furious to think to do that. But I would be happy to give you the play by play."
"Okay, great. Maybe later today," he kisses her head once more and stands up from the bed, "I'm going to get some work done. I already feel behind."
She bites her lips and looks up at him.
"Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Not yet, thank you. I'll let you know," he starts to step away. She can't quite decipher his mood, though she believes he really isn't angry with her. But he does seem bothered. And she knows he's not really going to his office to work on Truncheon stuff, that he probably needs to get his thoughts out somehow.
"Jess," she calls before he gets out of the room. He turns to her in the doorway, and every handsome feature of his face is lit up by a sliver of sunlight. Her chest shakes caught off guard by the beauty of it. His look is thoughtful but pained; lip raised slightly like he's in the middle of an argument in his head. Tension visible where his brows are furrowed together. She wants to make it all go away, but she knows it's not about her, and it's one of those things that she can't make better for him. Instead of attempting to soothe his fury, she lets him know that he's not alone.
"I love you," she says firmly, then smiles softly and adds, "and I'm going to make sure there's a fruit tart at your birthday dinner, don't worry."
His mouth settles into an amused smile.
"My favorite, thank you. Though I'm sure I'll be eating it all by myself."
She smiles, "Oh, I'm sure Luke will help you. But not me. I'll be having some of the chocolate cake with buttercream icing that I'm sure mom is going to pick out."
"I would expect nothing else from the Lorelai's," he teases, now leaning against the doorframe and looking more relaxed. But his face is serious again in a moment.
"And I love you, Rory. Any…weirdness you're getting from me has nothing to do with you. I promise."
She nods in understanding.
"But…be patient with me. I just need some time to myself today. Okay?"
Her heart aches but she nods again, "Of course. I'll be around if you need me."
He gives her a small, appreciative smile before turning to leave the room.
He gets his coffee from the kitchen, leaving his breakfast either for Rory to have or to eat when he has an appetite again. He walks back to the office, shutting the door behind him. He powers his phone off and shoves it in his desk. Then takes a seat. Placing down his coffee, he turns on his laptop. He opens a blank word document. Then, he unleashes; beating words into the keyboard and weaving his racing thoughts into something constructive. Writing harsh but true prose, pouring from his seemingly endless cup of frustrating experiences. The world around him is rendered invisible in these moments, and he won't be able to see it again until he's drained of every lingering thought for the day.
Rory sits outside the office door, sipping her coffee and listening to his ceaseless typing. She takes a deep breath, and she smiles. Because she knows this is a form of therapy to him, that it's a good sign he's facing his feelings rather than suppressing them. She knows that once he's emptied himself into his writing, he will be in her arms again with his beautiful smile and limitless love. And while she doesn't know how long that will take, she stays sitting outside the door so she's only a few steps away when he's ready. She places her coffee down and closes her eyes, resting her head against the wall.
She whispers to herself, "Firm as a rock."
ps - the jimmy stuff will not be in focus after this chapter, don't worry. I really just wanted to see Rory yell at him.