The Thing About Taking the Plunge
The thing about taking the plunge, was that the Pacific Ocean was frigid this type of year.
Delia was used to doing stupid things, but a polar plunge was out of her wheelhouse. She was reckless; she did not have a death wish.
The weather did not stop Sidney Madden from jumping in. He pulled his sweater over his head, kicked his pants to the sand, and ran into the water. He didn't care if his lips turned blue or if his skin broke out into permanent goosebumps. He was happy as a clam, hooting and hollering over the crash of waves.
Delia had taken a different kind of plunge on this date. Elodie hadn't wanted her to leave the palace grounds with another date - not after the unsupervised state fair/night club incident - but there was only so many teas or walks around the garden one could bear before it became tedious. And boring for viewers. Elodie had griped about low ratings this past week, that the Selection wasn't polling well, so a change of scenery it was.
Sidney just happened to be the only Selected she had yet to go on a one-on-one date with.
Was that on purpose? ...Maybe.
It wasn't her fault he was intimidating and acted like he hated her! At least Delia knew where she stood with Jae's brand of antagonism. Sidney was a whole other story: a mystery wrapped in an enigma put in the body of a twenty-two year old post-graduate student.
So, Delia watched him from the safety of the shore, her toes buried in the sun-warmed sand. Days like this were rarer and rarer as winter came creeping in. Soon, it would be too chilly even with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders to sit on the beach. Most people had already given up for the season, the swath of sea and sand all hers. If it weren't for the cameras not-so-subtly perched nearby, Delia would have thought she was on another vacation or get away trip with the fam. Or Poppy.
The world slowed as Sidney exited the ocean, water pouring down his hair onto his chest as he walked her way. Normally Delia wasn't into skinny dudes with tattoos, but Sidney made it work. His random assortment of ink was quirky - just like him. It made sense, and he owned the strangeness of his body. That kind of confidence was magnetic in its own way.
He shook his hair out like a dog, salty drops falling onto Delia as he cackled and she shrieked.
"You're a menace!" she cried, burying herself under the blanket where it was safe and dry.
Sidney just kept laughing. He pulled a water bottle out of the cooler the filming crew had packed - their own assortment of snacks Elodie had called an 'impromptu picnic' even though it totally wasn't.
"You mind if I take you somewhere?" he asked, uncapping the bottle and taking a long drink. Delia totally wasn't watching this throat bob as he swallowed.
"Depends on where."
Sidney pointed and Delia followed his finger.
"You see that house up on the cliff? The one with the blue siding and red roof?"
"Yeah, I see it."
It blended in with all the other houses facing the cliff, about a mile walk from where they sat.
"That's my house."
"Stop fucking with me," Delia replied with a laugh.
"I'm not. I grew up in Waverly, but a few years back Mom and Dad sold the place and moved us out here. Mom wasn't too keen on it at first, but Dad managed to convince her that some sun and a beach would do them both some good."
Delia studied Sidney's face for any hint of a lie, but there was none.
"Are you serious?" Sidney nodded, which made the whole thing even crazier. "You wanna take me home? On our first date?"
"I'd like to," Sidney said, cool in his confidence. "Family is the most important thing to me. I can't date anyone seriously who doesn't get along with them. You want to know what I'm like? See how we click? There's no better place than home."
"That's moving a little fast don't you think?"
"I think I agreed to date a princess on live television, so anything is fair game."
"Touché."
There was nothing left to say, really. Delia was going to meet Sidney's family. On the first date. This had to be a Selection record.
They started walking, footprints sinking into the sand as the wind blew Delia's bangs across her face. It wasn't that she was nervous, per se. She had plenty of siblings; she knew how that dynamic worked. It was that...well...up until ten minutes ago she wasn't sure if this date was going to end in kissing or drowning. Now, she was off to play happy family. The difference was jarring.
"Are all the Madden sibs home?" she asked, trying to distract from the strangeness of it all.
"It's fall break so JJ's off med school, but she's got some conference thing the next two days so she's not home. Melody still lives in Waverly. Haylee's grounded for failing PolySci so she's got nowhere better to be. Aria might be at practice, but she and her fiancée both live nearby, so it's always a chance they'll crash from time to time."
"Wow, sounds like you guys are pretty close-knit."
"The closest," he agreed. "Mom likes it when we all do things together. She values family time, so we do the same."
"Wish my family was like that," Delia replied. Sidney gave her a strange look, and it wasn't until he kept staring that she realized how fucked up that sounded. What exactly she was implying. "Not that we don't value each other, it's just, we all have such different lives. Different responsibilities. It makes getting together as a unit...hard."
You won't have them all forever, her mind taunted, but Delia shook that off immediately.
"I can't imagine a life where I couldn't come to my family with anything."
"That must be nice."
Delia convinced herself she wasn't jealous. She wasn't. Not at all.
Soon enough the sand gave way to rocks and they were climbing up the steps of a private deck. The wood was worn and soft, painted a faded white and chipped away at places. It wasn't a pain to make the hike, the view growing more and more spectacular the higher they climbed. Delia could see the appeal of living so close to the water, even if it was a flood risk.
As soon as Sidney unlocked the back door, they were assaulted by two large greyhounds with reddish brown fur.
"Down girls!"
Sidney reached down to scratch both hyper pups behind the ears. The dogs loved that, rolling their tongues out their mouths and rolling over for Sidney to get to their bellies.
"This is Sansa and Marge - short for Margery," Sidney said as the dogs happily approached Delia and butted at her hands for pets.
"Someone must be a Game of Thrones fan," she replied, mesmerized at how soft their coats were.
"Yeah Aria and Melody were obsessed."
"Were?"
"Don't ask them about season eight."
"Sidney? Is that you?" came a voice further back in the house.
"Yeah, it's me Mom!" he called, gesturing for Delia to follow him down the hall.
The hall led them into a very cozy yet modern kitchen: bright white counters offset by dark cabinets and an island large enough to lay on. An open floor plan lent a stunning view of the water so that anyone who cooked could enjoy it. At the moment, an older woman with silver-blonde hair chopped carrots on a cutting board, a bottle of wine open and poured into a glass by her side. Orchestral music gently played in the background, her feet making tiny tapping motions to the beat.
"Oh good, you're home in time for dinner." When the woman looked up, she smiled brightly. "And you've brought a guest!"
"I told you I was bringing her."
"I know, but I'm never sure of these things," she said with a wave of the hand that held the knife, which somehow she made look graceful and vaguely threatening at the same time.
Delia put on her best smile, the one she used when she wanted to make good impressions. "It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Madden."
"Please, call me Candace," she insisted with another warm smile. "I hope you enjoy chicken pot pies. I'm cooking up a special recipe I learned in Munich nearly thirty years ago, but it hasn't failed me yet."
"That sounds wonderful."
"I was gonna give Delia a tour, if you didn't mind," Sidney said, leaned up against the counter as comfortable as he could be. And why wouldn't he? This was his house, his domain. Delia was in his domain now.
"Of course not. Just be sure to stay out of your sisters' rooms. You know how they get when you touch their things."
"I take one tube of chapstick in the third grade and suddenly I'm a kleptomaniac," Sidney griped, but there was no heat to it. In fact, both he and his mother were smiling. Delia desperately wished to be part of the inside joke.
"You two have fun. I'll call when dinner's ready."
They were followed out the kitchen by Sansa and Marge, the dogs happily trotting at their heels as Sidney commenced with his tour. The house really was spectacular: a mix of beachy and eclectic. There were windows everywhere, as if to let in as much natural light as possible. Everything was painted in light washes of pastels offset by natural woods, the open concept complimented by tons of hidden corners.
"Now, for my favorite room..." Sidney trailed off, opening a set of double doors.
It was a two-floor library with an honest to God spiral staircase tucked in the corner. A room like this was much better appreciated by Auden, but Delia found herself looking up to the exposed beams of the ceiling and smiling. This place just felt so much like Sidney: every square inch of shelf space stuffed with peeling books, a desk crammed in the corner facing yet another window.
"Is this where you do all your research?"
"Spent many sleepless nights pouring over my thesis right here," he said as he slapped the desk, rustling the papers on top. A laptop was buried underneath the mess, its silver casing covered in stickers ranging from the bisexual flag to floral patterns and something that could have been 'fuck the patriarchy' but was too far gone to read.
"What about your room?"
Delia didn't mean for that to sound as suggestive as it came out. Was she flirting? Did she want to sleep with him? It was hard to tell. Like, Sidney was attractive; it wouldn't be a hardship to fuck him. But they were in his house after just finding some common ground. It would be dumb to ruin that.
But that's what she did - ruin things.
Sidney clocked her in an instant, unimpressed. He didn't tell her off though, just gestured for her to follow. Sansa whined when she realized they were moving, not wanting to be left behind while Marge was satisfied lying in front of the library fireplace, already drifting into a nap.
Sidney led them both up the stairs to the second floor. Another open landing spoked off in many different directions. Each door was painted a different color, ranging from candy floss pink to neutral white to soft green. Like portals into different worlds.
Strange enough, he picked the pink door.
Inside was a room a lot like the library, but with a bed and an overflowing closet. There were clothes everywhere. Like, hoarder levels of clothes. Hayden would have frothed at the mouth with jealousy.
"Sorry about the mess," Sidney apologized, picking his way through the maze of clothes. "I'd say I wasn't expecting company, but I'd be lying."
"How do you live like this?"
"Very well, thank you," Sidney replied with his usual snark, a smile playing at his lips. "I know where everything is. There's a method to the madness."
True to his word, there were little paths carved out between piles of clothes and racks of shoes. One led to another desk, this one covered in bits and bobs that made it more like a vanity than anything else. The wall that surrounded it was covered in photos and polaroids, some framed and some taped to the wall in a haphazard collage.
Certain faces repeated over and over: Sidney's, of course, but also his sisters and his parents, a blonde woman and a blonde man who - while they had the same tanned skin and dark eyes - could not have looked more different, and the most beautiful black man she had ever laid eyes on (like Jesus fucking wept you could cut your hand on those cheekbones!)
"That's Peris. He's been my best friend since I could walk," Sidney explained, looking at the beautiful man with particular fondness. "Our dads were friends, then we were friends. Makes sense, yeah?"
"Yeah."
"He's a model now. That's probably why he looks so familiar."
That was not why Delia was staring, but she'd let Sidney believe what he wanted.
"That's Raquel," he continued, pointing to the blonde girl, "And Reed. That photo's from the first summer my parents bought this house. I invited them over for a party and they ended up staying a week. One of the best weeks of our lives."
"Are they together?"
"No. God no. And don't ever let them hear you say that or they'll both end up gagging over the toilet," Sidney replied, horrified. "In fact, I might just be a little sick at the thought..."
Delia rolled her eyes, moving onto the next photos. These were different from the rest: landscapes and wildlife all in and out of focus.
"Wow. Did you take these?"
"Dad did. He's a professional freelancer for editorials and other brands. These are just a few of his hobby shots," Sidney explained with a hint of pride. "He's off on a shoot right now, should be back some time next week. I wanted him to be here to meet you, but it took a while for you to get your shit together."
Delia flipped him off with a smile. Yeah, yeah she'd been a dick at the start of the Selection. She still wasn't sure she'd left that part of her behind. Some habits were too hard to break, no matter how hard she tried. But Sidney was ribbing her in a fun way, not in a mean way, so she let him have his dig.
"I hope he charges out the ass for his photos."
"How do you think we afford two houses in this economy?"
"Generational wealth?"
"Unfortunately Mom's trust fund has been dry since she was twenty."
"Damn, and here I thought you were coasting through life on charm alone."
"I'm not allergic to a little hard work, unlike some of us."
"Hey, dating thirty men at once is hard work," Delia teased right back, giving as good as she got. "Especially when I have to commit the rest of my life to someone I hardly know at the end of it. You could be a serial killer for all I know, and you've brought me to here to kill me and feed my dismembered corpse to the dogs."
On cue, Sansa let out a little bark, her tongue lolling happily out her mouth.
"Wow, that was...strangely specific," Sidney said through a huff of a laugh, running a hand through his salt-dried hair. "Though, I must admit, I'd rather just hide you under my floorboards until the sound of your beating, undead heart drives me insane."
His smile was playful, and Delia liked this new, relaxed him. It was better than the version of him that hated her. Though, she was starting to suspect hatred might not have been the right word.
"Isn't your thesis on classic literature? Like Greek classic?"
"Can't a man dabble in both?"
"In my experience, he can," the air between them grew thick, flirting crossing the line into something more as she asked, "But can he handle it?"
Sidney waited a beat. Then two.
Then, he was violating her personal space, walking forward until she was forced to move with him, her back hitting the wall as he pressed her up against it. The breath left Delia's lungs, and then there was no need to breathe at all, Sidney's mouth fitting itself to hers and consuming her whole.
Sidney was...a good kisser. No, that was an understatement. He was a phenomenal kisser. Experienced for sure, reading her like one of his prized books and studying her quick. Delia's head spun as Sidney drank down every sound she made, brought his hand up to cradle her face, stroked his fingertips along her jaw, down her throat.
It made Delia shiver, and Sidney laughed against her lips.
"Isn't this what you wanted?" he asked, his breath deliciously warm in her ear. "Don't tell me you're afraid to break the rules."
"What rules?" Delia scoffed, pulling her shirt up over her head. It landed in a pile with his and their shoes. "I'm the princess. I make the rules. Besides, you're not the first Selected I've been with."
"Ouch. Way to bruise a man's pride." Sidney held a hand to his chest, the other stretched out to pull her in. "Here I was thinking I was special."
"Not in the least, I'm afraid." She nipped at his lips, pulling them between her teeth and relishing when he hissed.
"Who was it?"
"Andre."
"You'll have to tell me what that was like. Later."
Delia pushed him back, fixed him with an unbelieving stare.
"What? Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked with a laugh, leaning over to mouth over the skin where he throat met her jaw. Sinful lips trailed up to the shell of her ear, saying, "The only reason I haven't made a pass at Andre is because of the rules you so callously ignore. Make no mistake, if we're both eliminated, I'm shooting my shot."
That shouldn't have been hot. Sidney was talking about getting with one of the people she was actively dating. Sloppy seconds and all that. But it was hot, and her cheeks flushed at the thought of the three of them in bed and -
"Fair enough," she choked out, dazed and confused and possibly more turned on than she had been her entire life.
Sidney reached for the elastic of her waistband. She reached out to still his hands.
"You sure you want to desecrate your childhood bed?"
Delia had to be sure. For some reason, she needed him to be sure. This felt all fun and games, but it was too easy. Whatever storm brewing between them could be something dangerous.
"It was desecrated a long time ago," Sidney assured her, resuming his tugging.
"What, by your pre-pubescent wank sessions?"
"Shut up," he grumbled with a laugh, biting down on her neck. Hard.
Delia gasped, fisted the sheets.
"I bet even your porn was ethical," she teased, staring at the glow in the dark stars stuck to the ceiling. Her eyes wandered further, landing on a sagging, overstuffed bookcase. "You probably jacked off to Common Sense by Thomas Paine, or Voltaire, or - "
The breath left her lungs as she was pushed to the bed, falling to the mattress with an 'oof'. Before she knew it, her hands were pulled up above her head, held down by Sidney's much larger one. He smirked at her.
"You got anything else smart to say?"
Delia shook her head no.
"Good girl."
That was the last coherent thing either of them said.
.o.O.o.
When Delia got back to Misa's flat, she found the door ajar. Any sane person would think there was a break in, but Delia knew more than likely that Misa had simply forgotten to shut it all the way. It wouldn't be the first time.
Inside, it looked like a robbery. There were clothes strewn everywhere, trunks and cases half-packed with junk. All of Misa's tools were stacked on the entryway table, leather bound and carefully cleaned. The only thing in the whole place treated with care. Everything else was strewn about.
Maybe someone really had broken in.
But then, Delia caught sight of Misa's familiar backside. She was bent over the coffee table, rifling through paper, victims of her manic search scattered around her feet.
"What are you doing?"
"Looking for my lease. It has to be around here somewhere…"
"Why are you looking for your lease? It isn't up for another four months."
"I'll need it to sublet. No one takes kindly to squatting, and I'd rather not lose the place while I'm gone."
"Gone?"
"The Royal Archeological Society has selected an elite group of researchers for a six month stint in Istanbul, and I'm one of them."
"That's incredible! Congratulations."
Misa hummed, distracted by grabbing books at random off her shelf.
"So…when does the job start?"
"I have a flight at Heathrow at six. Really, I should be gone already."
"You were going to leave without saying goodbye?"
"Why would I have stayed? There isn't a moment to waste. I'm already late as it is, and at this rate Peterson will have taken the best assignment because he was able to get an earlier flight."
"I just…I would have thought you'd have asked me first."
"Ask you?" Misa scoffed. "Do I need your permission to do my job now, Highness?"
"No. Of course not. But I am your girlfriend, and you're going to be gone for so long. I just thought - "
"Girlfriend?" Misa laughed, and not kindly. She actually took a moment from packing to throw her head back and bark out, "Oh, sweetheart, you are not my girlfriend."
"What?"
"We agreed, remember. No labels, no commitments."
"I know, but -"
"You can't just change your mind when it suits you. That's not how this works."
"We've been together almost a year - "
"And it's been a fun year, a great year. But that doesn't mean I want to tie a bow on a great fuck and call it my girlfriend."
"But...I love you."
The confession made Delia giddy. It felt so good to have her feelings out in the open instead of shoved in the back corners of her mind. She was always so afraid of unsettling Misa; Misa hated grand declarations of emotion. Said they were dramatic and unnecessary. But this was necessary. If it meant keeping Misa here, by her side, then Delia would take the risk.
Delia miscalculated.
What should have been a joyful moment was soured by Misa's frown. By Misa's silence. By Misa's long, drawn out push away from her desk. Delia had gone from girlfriend to nuisance in the blink of an eye.
"I always thought this might happen," Misa sighed, annoyed. As if Delia were the puppy caught peeing in the house. She pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a heavy sigh. "I feared it would, but I thought you were different. Mature enough not to mistake sex with your desire for a spontaneous, albeit statistically unlikely, love."
"Spontaneous, albeit statistically unlikely, love?" Delia repeated, her tongue heavy as lead, her mind sluggish and speeding at the same time as she struggled to process the vitriol sent her way. "As opposed to what other kind of love? Planned love? That's not how feelings work!"
"How could you tell me this now? Right before the semester starts - the new semester at the university I've always dreamed to be at? How selfish and gratuitous can you be?" Misa fumed, pacing a hole in the carpet. Delia had never seen her this mad, this absolutely livid. It was like Misa was a whole other person. "I've been trying to put distance between us so that you wouldn't get the wrong picture."
"The wrong picture," Delia repeated, utterly numb. "What wrong picture?"
"Us. This little fantasy you've got in your head where we ride hand in hand off into the sunset. I'm not interested."
As if to drive the point home, the door to Misa's bedroom opened. Out walked a voluptuous blonde dressed in nothing but one of Misa's white button-downs, the shirt comically small and the buttons straining to cover her chest. She might as well have pranced out naked, which was likely exactly how she had been five minutes ago.
"Hey babe, you got any food in the fridge or do I need to make another run to the Tesc-oh shit."
She had a beautiful voice and the body of a goddess and apparently knew how to cook.
This woman was the complete opposite of Delia.
"You're heard me talk about Bella before," Misa said offhandedly.
Oh.Oh.
The cracks in Delia's heart turned into fissures, which broke into caverns too wide to cross. Love poured from her open wounds like a river, leaving her hollow. Empty. Absolutely gutted.
The river travelled from her heart to her eyes, flooding her tear ducts. Misa hated it when Delia cried; she claimed it made her uncomfortable and always told Delia to stop. But there was no stopping it this time. Delia's grief was insurmountable, unstoppable.
"You had to have known," Delia said, her voice small and wounded. "Everyone knew."
She hated how weak she sounded, how pathetic. Hated how apathetic Misa stood in response. Hated how Misa didn't even care enough to correct the bad behavior, arms crossed over her chest. Disappointed.
"Doesn't matter. I told you from the start I wasn't going to change. Not even for a princess. You should've handled it better."
Bella backed into the bedroom. "I'm just gonna…"
She shut the door. Delia didn't notice.
"What should I have done then?" she demanded, anger flaring hot in her gut where despair had made a hole.
"Buried it."
What an archaeological thing to say. Maybe someone a thousand years from now would excavate this spot and find the fossilized remains of Delia's heart.
.o.O.o.
Delia woke up sweaty and plastered against a furnace.
Not a furnace. Sidney.
For a skinny twig, he sure did put off a lot of body heat. Had her sweating...and not in a fun way this time. Even with the blankets off, the heat was smothering. Too much to handle.
Slowly, she moved his arm off of her and dropped it onto the pillow. He snuffled at that and rolled over, but stayed asleep. Another victory. Delia seized her opportunity to slip out of bed and out onto the back porch, grabbing her vape out of her bag as she went.
Outside, the cool evening air hit her like a slap to the face. She had to pull her sweatshirt tight around her waist as she moved into the last sunny spot. Not that there were many options this late in the evening. Still, the view was something. Delia admired the waves as they crashed and rolled against the shore. The tide was high now, but it would roll out soon, and so would she.
It was a mistake to have let herself fall into old habits. Opened up a whole new can of worms she wasn't prepared to deal with. Just like she wasn't prepared to deal with the knowledge of how Sidney's bedhead looked or how he smiled without any of that classic snark when she made a good joke or what shade of green his eyes looked when the light hit them a specific way and made the hazel rim shine gold. Too many intimate details about a boy she shouldn't be getting attached to.
Too many details about too many boys, and worse was knowing she'd have to break their hearts. That task didn't daunt her at the start of the Selection, but now? Now it seemed impossible.
She turned away from the ocean, a cloud of smoke following her as she walked further down the porch. There were a couple rooms on this level, each of them with their own doors leading outside. The last one was the most interesting because it looked nothing like the others.
Where every other room in the house was an eclectic mix of artistry and color, this one was...beige. Plain walls with anatomical drawings and gold-framed gallery walls of journals and articles yellowed with time. An honest to god skull sat atop a mantle with a few more framed photos and awards. The bed was meticulously made, the desk organized with minimal supplies. Not a single article of clothing littered the floor.
Delia had to know more.
She leaned forward, pocketed her vape, and use both hands to cup the glass and get a better look.
On second glance, there were a few personal things: a jacket tossed on the back of a chair, a worn stuffed polar bear sitting atop a pillow, a ribbon board with a collection of equally-spaced mementoes pinned to its cushions. One of those mementoes glittered as the sun struck it, the item extremely familiar...
"Hey"
Delia jumped back to find Sidney leaning against his door, pleasantly rumpled and still half-asleep. And confused, not quite sure what he was looking at.
This looked bad. She would have to explain herself. That's what a normal person would do, but Delia couldn't make her brain find the words.
"I didn't realize your family were patrons for the Hope Gala," she blurted instead, her immediate thoughts taking over.
Sidney was confused. "We're not. I mean, we have money, but not that kind of money. Mom's paying one college tuition and another coming up. And her boyfriend isn't sitting on piles of cash far as we know; pre-law students rack up just as much debt as pre-med."
Delia pointed to the ticket pinned up on the board. "That's a premium ticket - only the topmost donors get them in gold. Trust me, I had to sit through too many dinners with Mom slaving away over the details."
Sidney frowned, a cute crease cutting across his forehead. He stepped around her and, with practiced finesse, jimmied the sliding door open. The hinge was silent, thank god, and they were able to step inside the room without making a commotion.
Once he got to the ribbon board, he carefully unpinned the ticket.
"Why the hell does JJ have this..."
"Maybe she's got rich friends," Delia suggested, taking a look around the neat and tidy space of miss JJ Madden. "Med school is filled with pompous, elite bastards whose mommies and daddies would kill to show up with one of those bad boys."
"And casually drop twenty grand on a girl they don't know?"
"Super rich friends then."
Sidney's frown deepened. "We don't keep secrets from each other. Why would she hide this?"
"You could always, I dunno, ask her."
"Thanks. I hadn't thought of that," he deadpanned, pinning the ticket back to the board exactly where it had been. No one would ever know they'd snooped.
"Sidney, Delia, dinner!" Candace called from downstairs. Even at this distance, Delia could smell the crust of the pot pie crisping. Her mouth watered.
"Come on, let's get some food in you before we go back to the palace," Sidney said, opening JJ's door so Delia could leave first. "Mom makes killer mashed potatoes."
"Can't wait," Delia replied, following Sidney down the stairs. And the funny thing was, she was telling was the truth.