The IMP crew were driving their company's van through the streets as a song was played on the radio. "Oh I love this song," Blitzo shouted as he began singing along to the song poorly. "You were a spicy little… uh-Demon with the uh-bleach blonde hair!"
Loona is in the passenger seat as she's mildly annoyed at her adopted father's singing. Moxxie covers his nonexistent ears in the back seat while Millie rolls down the window and pops her head out smiling as she's looking up. "You're doing okay up there, sugar," the female imp asks.
Joseph was lying on top of the roof of the van while he was chilling during the ride. "Doing fine as always, Mill," the sinner responded. "I always wanted to ride on top of a moving vehicle! Living the dream!"
They drive into an old crowded parking lot while Blitzo is singing terribly. The IMP crew was about to park in their spot when a pink car took their parking spot. "OH HOLY SHIT FU-" Blitzo panics as he slams onto the brakes and the van skids to a stop, sending Joseph flying and crashing.
"Ahhh my back! Ohh my back! My back," Joseph cried as he carefully picked himself up while holding onto his back. "I knew it was a bad idea…"
"LISTEN UP YOU UNORIGINAL PINK CUM DUMP," Blitzo yelled through his microphone at the ones who stole his parking spot. "YOU HAVE THREE GOD DAMN SECONDS TO GET YOUR TITS OUT OF MY PARKING SPOT!!!"
Joseph was about to regroup his crew until he blushed at the sight of a hot famous demoness before he looked away when she glared at him. "Oh shit! Verosika," the imp boss shouted, shocked.
Verosika blew a bubble gum before she responded, "Blitz-o."
"I should have known you'd be here! I could smell fish for miles, which is odd. Because I believe the nearest ocean is-" Blitzo climbed out of the van until he fell faceplants to the group before standing up to finish. "THREE RINGS DOWN!!!"
"And I should have known you'd be here when I the amber alerts," the demoness responded with a comeback.
"Oh yeah? I'm surprised they let your fat ass out of rehab! I can see you're still a drunken whore, clutching onto that Beelzejuice bottle like it's the last cock in Hell!"
"They let me out because I'm still famous. And rehab is for sad, loser wash-ups," she responded while flipping her long hair back dramatically. Verosika took a drink from her bottle before she finished talking, "So, your sister says hi."
"Why are you parkin' here," the enraged imp yelled as he angrily approached her. "This is the ONLY parking spot my company has! So take that tampon race car somewhere else!"
"Actually, prick. It has my name on it," she told him as the demoness pointed down at a spray paint of her name with the crossed-out IMP.
"Whoa! How long was it like that," Joseph asked, surprised. "Also, is this even legal?"
"This is Hell, cutie. Nothing here is legal or fair. I'm doing a bit of freelance for one of the infinitely more successful companies in the building and they wanted to have me come in this week to lead their team during spring break."
"A WEEK," Blitzo said, shocked.
"Spring break? It's already spring break," Joseph asked, confused. "I last remember that I died in June-"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP," Blitzo yelled as he grabs the sinner by the collar before he pushed Joseph away and turn his attention back to Verosika. "And nononono! You are NOT parking here for a fuckin' week!"
"Aww you mad, Blitz-o," she asks while removing her sunglasses. "You gonna run off, leaving someone else to pay for the hotel room, steal their car and-"
"Run three rings to Wrath and max MY credit cards on shitty horse riding lessons," Blitzo said along with Verosika before he became annoyed with holding a grudge. "Goddamn it whore! You will NOT let that go!"
"Choke on a sandpaper cock," she told him while flipping the imp off as the pop star walks away.
"HOLD ON!!! You better move that pussy wagon right now! Joseph!"
The sinner immediately rushed over to back up his boss as he shouted at the demoness, "You heard him, ma'am! You better move your somewhat cool car out of our parking spot right now or else we'll-"
Suddenly, the two heard growling behind them and when they turned around to find a big muscular hellhound towering the pair. "You'll what," the hound growled.
The two stood there scared by the tough hellhound as Blitzo looked at his employee and asked, "Joseph?" The sinner was about to respond until he ran away and hid in fear, abandoning his boss. "Oh dammit, Zoseph. Okay, or I'll… uh… uh, I-I'll call HR!"
After a second of awkward silence, all of them, including Joseph, laugh as if in a sitcom before the sinner goes back into hiding when it's done. "Anyway, meet my new hellhound, Vortex," Verosika introduces her bodyguard to the imp. "Unlike you, he actually does his job well. Ta-ta, fuck stain." She flips Blitzo off before walking away with the hellhound.
"Ugh, I wasted so much time with a bag of holes like that," Blitzo said to himself. "Oh, and thanks for the help back there, Zoseph! You little scared bitch!"
"You saw the size of that guy! He can easily break my bones with one punch! If you were in my shoes, you would've done the same thing," Joseph responded while emerging from his hiding spot.
"Wrong, kiddo. I would've pushed you to him and then run away. I thought you know me better-"
Suddenly, Loona kicked the van door open and stepped out as she yelled at Blitzo, "You know Verosika Mayday?!"
"Huh? Oh yeah. Her, yeah. We dated."
"Was it before or after she became a pop star," Millie asked.
"You dated a pop star," Moxxie asked, shocked as he stepped out of the van.
"You dated a chick," Joseph asked, causing the crew to stare at him. "What?! You know this guy! He's into a bunch of sick and unhealthy stuff!"
"Okay, why are you all acting like that's such a shock," Blitzo asked, annoyed.
"Hello! It's Verosika Mayday," the hellhound says.
"It's you," the female imp says.
"She's a chick," the sinner says.
"I just… Is she blind?! Suffering some form of brain damage," Moxxie asked in disbelief.
"Okay, dial it back, Mox my dude. Or else you're gonna suffer your own brain damage, little buddy."
"Okay, look, you are all making this into a way bigger deal than it needs to be. I don't pry into your stupid personal lives," Blitzo told them.
"You do that all the time, sir," Moxxie yelled.
"Come on, you kinda do that," Millie responded.
"You totally do that," Loona replied.
"Yeah you do that, boss. If you keep breaking into my apartment, Larry's gonna put a restraining order against ya," Joseph told him.
"What was sex with her like," Millie asked while she grinned mischievously.
"Millie," Moxxie shocked as he's taken aback by his wife's question.
"Wow, Mill! I had no idea you're into chicks too," the sinner smirks.
"What?! She's a pop star! You'd wanna know what sex with Michael Crawford was like," the female imp told her husband.
Moxxie is about to scold his wife but changes his mind and responds, "Touché."
"Who the heck is Michael Crawford," Joseph asks.
"He's a famous actor I admire. He played a marvelous role in The Phantom of the Opera! I simply adore him!"
"Yo, Mox? How old are you?"
"Okay, look, let's just drop it," Blitzo told them. "Millie, find a temporary spot for that truck." He tossed the keys to the imp as she caught them gleefully. "Okay, Loona, Moxxie, Zoseph, let's go handle this shit."
The four of them headed inside the building and took the elevator to their floor. They exited the elevator while Loona walked nervously. "Loona, are you okay? What's wrong," Joseph asked her.
"I… I don't know it's just this is Verosika Mayday. A famous pop star," she told him. "Do you think they saw me? Fuck! I did my makeup shitty today!"
"It's fine, Loona. You look perfect just the way you are. Nothing wrong about ya at all."
"He's right! You look perfect, Loonie! Like always," Blitzo told her with shining eyes.
"Shut up, da-" She immediately stopped when Blitzo looked at her with adoration on his face for almost calling him dad. "Ugh! Blitz," she corrected herself as she shoved her adopted father away.
"She almost called ya dad, boss," the sinner smiled as he helped Blitzo up.
"I know and I love my Loonie so much-" The imp boss gasped in shock when he caught Loona and the hellhound bodyguard, Vortex, glancing at each other. Joseph was shocked as well because he had a crush on her. The female hellhound was blushing and wagging her tail until her overprotective father moved in between them with his arms out. "Hi, big man! Where's your bitch bag of an employer?"
"Please," Joseph added to be polite while he stood beside his boss.
"She's in her office. There wasn't room on the second floor, so they rented one here on this one," Vortex told them as he pointed at an office with Verosika's initials on it. The office is right across from the IMP office.
"Whoa! Out of all the offices she can rent it has to be the one next to ours? I did not see that coming."
"Yeah. It's cheaper."
"OH COME ON," Blitz yelled, frustrated.
"Sorry, man," Vortex scoffed as he walked off.
"Oh, no you don't, bitch," the imp muttered angrily.
"Sir, how about you let me go in and try to reason with her," Moxxie asked him. "I don't really listen to what's classified as 'pop genre' music, so her status to me is name recognition alone…"
"That explains so much about ya, Mox," Joseph commented.
"And look at how pop music got you in life, Joseph."
"I have you know that pop music makes me happy and makes me wanna dance! But you're too much of an opera dude, Mox."
"Well, opera music brings art and beauty. In my opinion, her music is a bit derivative of-"
"Moxxie shut the fuck up," Blitzo yelled at him.
"Alrighty, then."
When Moxxie headed over to Verosika's office, Joseph wished him the best of luck while giving him a thumbs up. "You got this, Mox," he shouted. Once the imp goes inside, the sinner turns towards his friends and asks, "So uh… what type of demons is Moxxie gonna deal with here?"
"They're Hellborn," Loona told him.
"And that means?"
"They're natural-born citizens of Hell. They're above imps and hellhounds."
"Weird. What makes them so special?"
Then suddenly, Verosika and her crew began sexually assaulting Moxxie as he begged for mercy. Blitzo races and presses his hands against the window as he cries for his employee, "Moxxie! Don't let her access any of your holes!"
"I really wanna go in there to save him… but I don't wanna get caught into that mess! It's too late for Mox… but it's not late for me." Luckily, Moxxie races out there while panting heavily from the experience as his face is covered in kiss marks. "Mox! Are you okay, little buddy?! What did they do to you?! Wait don't answer that!"
The frightened imp was stuttering and shaken from the assault as he walked off and responded, "I… I gotta go lie down… now…" Moxxie didn't go too far as he collapsed onto the ground, and passed out.
"Oh, this won't STAND," Blitzo yelled in complete rage as he marched towards the office.
"Wait! Blitz! Boss! Hang on! Let's think about this-"
The imp boss kicked the doors open, causing Verosika and her gang to notice. "ALRIGHT #@&%!!!"
"Whoa! Boss! Language," Joseph yelled from the outside.
"FUCK YOU," Blitzo yelled at him before turning back to his ex. "If you're gonna be shitty to my employees, then I challenge you to a fuckin'… challenge! Fuck. I said it twice."
"Mmmm… Is this imp boy starting a demon duel," one of the demonesses asks."
"I think he is," Verosika chuckles as she leans towards her ex. "What's the game, Blitz-o?"
"Every year, you STD spreaders go up topside for easy pickin's while spring break is a prime time for crime of all kinds! So I bet... you succu-bitches can't fuck as many people as we can off by the end of the day," Blitzo smirks.
"Yeah-Wait what," Joseph said, shocked.
The succubi laughed at Blitzo's challenge while the imp glared in determination until they stopped laughing. "Oh? You're serious," Verosika asked.
"Uh please excuse me real quick. I need to chat with my boss for a moment," the sinner told her while chuckling nervously before he pulled his boss away. "Boss! What are you thinking," he whispered to Blitzo. "Killing many people than them fu-having sex with them?! Are you insane?!"
"Calm down, Zoseph," the boss told him. "We're professional assassins. We can kill thousands of fuckers by sunset or before the miss pop bitch has her period."
"Okay, gross gross. Also, people up there are always horny! Like horny toads horny! Literally, everyone in the living world is always horny and they will have sex with anything! And I mean anything! This is a bad idea."
"And how do you know so much about the living world?"
"Hello! I'm a sinner! I was born in the living world!"
"You are?"
"What?! Don't remember my uh… last mess we were in?! We were being chased by gangsters, got into a fight with a dude who hates sinners, and I almost died! Don't you remember any of that?!"
"Eh. Only remember the important stuff."
"The point is this is a terrible idea! I mean she's only gonna be here for a week. Why not just let her have it till then?"
"Wow! You make an excellent point. A brilliant point. Well done, kiddo. Now, here's a tiny, tiny question… WHO SIDE ARE YOU ON," Blitzo yelled at his employee while choking him furiously before he pushed him away and turned back to Verosika. "Now, what do you say, skank?!"
"Game on… bitch," the pop star smirked.
"This isn't gonna end well," Joseph said.
Later at the IMP headquarters, Blitzo explained their plan to win the bet against Verosika to his employees while drawing a goofy cartoon drawing on the whiteboard. "Alright, shut your assholes! Here's how we're gonna do this shit! First, we find a fuck ton of clients. We portal up. We have our fun murder time as per usual. We pile all the bodies into a big fuckin' canoe. We push said canoe into some water. We light it on fire to attract the sharks and eagles 'n shit. Maybe a goose, too! Fuck it! They come and eat the bodies, we win the bet! We rub it in that sloppy bitch's drunken whore-ass face! Do you have… any questions," Blitzo asked after he was done explaining as he threw a point stick through a window.
"Uh yeah. Why was that nonsense," Moxxie asked.
"That wasn't a question."
"That wasn't a plan."
"This wasn't a good idea to begin with, boss," Joseph added.
"Oh shut up, Joe. I didn't see ya trying to stop me," the employer told him.
"I did! You ignore me!"
"Sir, that presentation makes no sense whatsoever," the annoyed imp said.
"I'm sorry but that was a flawless presentation of what we should do, Mox," Blitzo told him. "It's not my fault you got a smooth little brain upstairs."
"A what now?"
"I'm callin' ya slow, Moxxie. God, why don't you learn to take criticism, you talentless baby dicked troll," the boss said, annoyed as he's poking at his employee's chest.
"Ha! Troll," Joseph laughed.
"Well, why don't you take an art class," Moxxie said, angrily as he climbed onto the meeting table and pointed down at his boss.
"Why don't you see how EXPENSIVE they are," Blitzo yelled as he grabbed and threw Moxxie back into his seat.
"He's right, Mox! Come on! You should know that," the sinner agrees. "Drawing arts and animation is very difficult to master and very expensive to learn about. People who do them deserve more credit and respect! So show some flippin' respect, Mox!"
"Hey, is there a way I can come with you guys this time," Loona asked.
"Yes," Joseph cheered.
"NO," Blitzo yelled as he grabbed the sinner by the face and pushed him away. "Absolutely not, I forbid it. Not gonna happen. Sorry, sweetie. Spring break is no place for young, vulnerable goth girls. You know the kind of FREAKS up there who'd drool all over you!"
The crew simultaneously breaks the fourth wall by glaring disapprovingly at the reader. Except for Joseph who looks away while blushing guilty because he has feelings for Loona.
"Well, I can blend in with humans easily enough. Just let me tag along," the hellhound told them.
"Wait, say that again," Blitzo asked while he was surprised.
"I can… blend in?"
"Do you have a human disguise," Millie asked.
"Yeah, don't you?" The imps and sinner nervously look at each other, eyes side to side. "You four have been screwing around on Earth this whole fucking time… without human disguises?!"
"Okay! New plan," Blitzo says as he draws another goofy drawing and displays it. "Loonie can help lure the humans to us, and we'll take care of the rest. Okay, how about that?"
"Flawless logic," Millie commented.
"Brilliant as always," Joseph agreed.
"I think you're missing the biggest issue, sir. Isn't it crucial to have a client who demands enough kills to win this bet? We aren't just going up to massacre," Moxxie complained.
"Why not?! Works every time on Grand Theft Auto!"
"I'm not sure what that is but this is real life! Not virtual reality!"
"I got it covered, Mox. Follow me," the imp boss shouted as he lured them outside.
Loona was still annoyed by them running loose in the living without disguises as she lashed out at Joseph, "Them I get but you?!"
"Wh-I-Uh-I-I'm still new here! I thought they didn't need disguises because they're professionals," the sinner said in his defense.
"You should know that they're not by now!"
"Look, I don't know all the rules in Hell! Heck, I don't even know any of the rules at all!"
"You are so fucking stupid."
"Ye-Yeah… I know…"
When they all headed to the streets, Blitzo immediately put up a ratty flyer reading spring break victims fifty percent off. "Now we wait," the boss told his crew as they waited for clients.
"Brilliant idea, boss," the sinner cheered. "A discount! Everyone loves discounts! We'll be swimming in clients in no time!"
"Sir... there is no way we are going to get enough clients by the end of the day with one poorly spelled, bad grammar flyer," Moxxie complained.
Suddenly, after Moxxie was finished, they all looked to see a long line of demons. Blitzo smugly and elbowed the annoyed imp before he strolled toward their clients. "Now, who's first," the imp boss smirks.
"Whoa! That was quick! And he knows it would work," Joseph told Moxxie while the imp was very annoyed. "I have to say he's one helluva boss!"
Later, the crew prepared themselves for their killing spree in the living world. Joseph carried the deadly melee weapons for his victims and was ready to go until Loona pulled him away. "Lo-Loona," he said her name while blushing a bit. "Wh-What are you-"
"Shut up and listen," she told him, annoyed as she pulled out the grimoire and turned to a transformation page. "Learn this spell and memorize it. I know those idiots will never do this but I want you to learn so you can be more useful out there."
"Oh wow uh… I… Thank you, Loona. I really appreciate it."
"Just please don't forget it. We can't have another dumbass around here." When Loona walked away, the sinner began studying and memorizing the spell from the grimoire for a while until the time had come to begin the challenge.
When they arrived in the human world, the crew hid behind rocks under a dock while examining the group of people partying at the beach during spring break. Blitzo told his employees about the plan while whispering, "Now, remember, we can't be seen, alright? And loose shots will likely cause a panic, so Loona can help with leading targets to a better spot to off 'em. You got the list, Loonie?"
Loona skims a long list in her hands and gives it a sniff, picking up the senses of every target. "Got it. Joseph is gonna help me out with luring in the targets."
"No, Loona! He can't go out there looking like that!"
"Joe."
"Oh right! I'm on it! Here we go…" The sinner took a deep breath as a flash of red light transformed him into a human form, surprising the crew. "Whoa! I look so much better than what I originally looked!"
"Wow, kiddo! You look absolutely disgusting," Blitzo smiles. "Well done! Loona?"
"On it," Loona responded as she stood up, and in a swirling flash of blue light, she transformed into her human form, shocking the imps and causing the sinner to blush.
"Ohhhhh, Loonie, look at you. You look…downright awful! I'm so proud," her adopted father smiles cheerfully, making Loona look away annoyed.
"Yeah, Loona… Yo-You look so hot," Joseph commented, causing both Loona and Blitzo to stare at him angrily. "I-I mean to a public view! Others will be very attractive to ya because you look gorgeous!" The sinner laughs for a bit until he looks away embarrassed.
"We're gonna have a talk about that, young man. Now fetch!"
Loona spotted the list of targets in front of her as she smirked. The hellhound tells the sinner about who's the targets as the two lure the victims to isolated areas so they can be killed by them and the crew. After they killed them, the gang put the corpses in bloodstained trash bags and closed them up. "I lost count! How many did we kill," Joseph asked.
"Thanks to Loona and ya help, kiddo, we got twenty kills in the bag," Blitzo told him.
"Awesome! We'll be done in no time!"
"That's the spirit, Joe! I like to see that waily snatch organism that many-"
Suddenly, the crowd of party people all gathered at the beach stage as Verosika Mayday emerged in her human form while she entertained the crowds. "Alright, spring breakers! Y'all ready to get fucked up and make some BITCHIN' BAD CHOICES," she shouted through her microphone, encouraging the audience. "This is your final boarding call. All aboard." The screens on the stage showed 'Fuck you, Blitzo' in front of everyone, causing Blitzo to growl like a rabid animal. The pop star began singing her seductive mating song to the crowd, causing everyone to make out with each other while Verosika's crew helped encourage the people to become more sexual.
"God DAMMIT!! That bitch started her goadish mating call! Now, she's gonna win all these sex maniacs," Blitzo yelled, angrily.
"Yeah I saw that coming," the sinner said.
"How come you didn't TELL ME?!!!"
"I did! You didn't listen!"
"EAT SHIT!!! We gotta pick things up, guys!" The imp boss spotted a vomiting man and asked Loona, "Is he on the list, Loonie?"
"Huh? Yeah… I-I think so," she responded while she was distracted.
Joseph notices the way Loona responds until he's shocked to see her walking towards the crowd. "Loona? Wait Loona! Where are you going," the sinner called her but she didn't hear him, causing him to chase after her. He pushed through the crowd of horny humans to look for his best friend while ignoring how disgusting the audience was.
Luckily, he spotted Loona headed towards Vortex so he rushed towards her until the sinner was stopped by a disguised demon as he was smirking seductively at him. Joseph plays along as he smirks back at him as well. The demon leans in to give him a sloppy kiss until the assassin brutally punches his privates and he falls to the ground in pain. "I'm straight, dumbass," he told him before he ran after his friend.
Joseph rushes over to Loona while she's chatting nervously with Vortex as he's listening in and waits for the perfect time to jump in. "Oh yeah? I wish I had friends," the disguised hellhound chuckled nervously. "I mean… No I mean, I don't… I… I don't have-"
The sinner immediately jumped in as he emerged between the two hellhounds. "Ha Loona! I was so worried about ya when you ran off," he smiles at her before he introduces himself to Vortex. "Hi! My name is Joseph! Nice to meet ya!"
"Sup, man. My name is Vortex. But my friends called me Tex," he introduced himself as well. "So, are you two together?"
"Wh-What?!"
"Huh?! N-No! Nononono! We're not together," Loona responded while she blushed a bit.
"Ye-Yeah! I'm… I'm sort of her best friend! Right?"
"Ye-Yeah! Yeah! He's uh… my best friend? Well uh… my only friend."
"Am I… interrupting something," Blitzo shouted as he shoved the sinner away.
"Nah, man. Just having a conversation," Vortex told the imp.
"Conversation leads to HPV," the boss pokes at the big hellhound, angering Loona and worried Joseph.
"Whoa whoa whoa, boss! They-They weren't gonna do that man," the sinner told him. "They were having a friendly chat-"
"And you! Slacking off on the job, partying instead of killing, you lazy selfish horny virgin bitch," he yelled at him, causing Joseph to blush embarrassed after what Blitzo said.
"Blitz, get the fuck out of here! You're gonna get us all into shit," Loona told her adopted father.
"I just wanted to see what was so important that you'd be distracted from your job."
"What? I can't have a break," she asked, annoyed as he pulled him away.
"We have a parking spot on the line!"
"Guys! Guys! Can we take this conversation somewhere else?! People are staring," the sinner told them while a few of the people stared at them for a second before looking back at Verosika's performance.
"Hey, dude. Why don't you chill out," Vortex told the imp, causing Loona to blush a bit.
"Why don't you stay out of it?! Okay! This is our business! Literally," Blitzo yelled.
"Fuck Blitz! Why can't you stay out of my face for like five minutes," Loona groaned frustrated, worrying Joseph.
"Because I adopted you! And that should mean something!"
"Come on, guys! Please don't fight. I hate seeing those I love-"
"SHUT IT," the imp and the hellhound shouted at him, scaring the sinner.
"What does that matter?! You're not my real dad! I was almost eighteen," Loona yelled at Blitzo.
"It still counts," the imp responded.
"Well, it shouldn't! I didn't need you then, asshole! I don't now!" The two look away from each other as Blitzo is torn from what she said to him.
It was silent between the two while Joseph was saddened by what Loona said to her adopted father. "Loona… Blitz… Blitz… she doesn't mean it," the sinner told his boss.
Loona felt bad about what she said to him as she tried to say something to him, "Uh… Blitz… I'm-"
"Enjoy your break, Loonie," Blitzo told her as he walked away. "I'm gonna go kill something!"
"Nonono! Boss! Come on! Don't go kill something out of sadness," Joseph told him as he ran off after the imp. He was going after Blitzo until he looked back and watched Loona walking away with Vortex. "Huh? Wait Loona!" Suddenly, the sinner is stuck in between as he turns in both directions, struggling to choose. "No wait Blitz! Wait Loona! Ah Blitz! Grr Loona! Boss! Best friend! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO?!!"
Then, the stressed sinner spotted Millie looking around among the stacks of beer kegs as he ran towards her. "Millie! Millie! I need your help," Joseph called her.
The female imp spotted him and rushed to her coworker. "Joseph! There ya are! Have ya seen Moxxie," she asked him, worried.
"What?! Where is he?!"
"Ah don't know! We were off killin the targets but somehow we got separated! Ah can't find him anywhere!"
"Oh my Lord! First Blitz, then Loona, and now Mox?! Why are we falling apart," he cried as he fell to his knees.
"GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER," Millie yelled as she slapped him in the face three times.
"Ow. Thank you, Mill. I needed that. Now, where's Mox?"
Suddenly, a barrel close by starts to wobble. The sinner rushes over to open it and tips over, revealing Moxxie sliding across the spilled beer. "Moxxie," Millie calls her husband.
"Mox?!"
"Millie," the drunk imp greeted his wife cheerfully. "Hiiii! Hey, when did you get four heads? I wanna kiss 'em." Moxxie makes smooching noises, causing Millie to smile.
"Drinking on the job, Mox? Do you not have a heart," the sinner told him as Millie helped her drunken husband up. "Great! First, Blitz is out there killing out of sadness! Second, Loona is out there with a dude-I mean she's out there not working! And now, our precious little Mox is drunk! This can't possibly get any worse."
Then suddenly, a fish monster emerges from the ocean behind the trio. Everyone panicked and screamed while running away from the deadly creature. "Oh my Godzilla," the sinner gasps.
"Oooooh! Fish," the drunken Moxxie said before the monster's tongue grabbed the imp.
"MOX!!!" The monster pulled Moxxie up as the drunk imp cheered at his doom before being pulled into the fish's mouth. "Don't worry, Mox! I'mma coming to save ya-" Joseph was interrupted when Millie killed a guy and threw a Molotov cocktail at the sea monster, causing it to lose balance and fall over. The sinner stood there surprised as Millie went over and attacked the monster head-on.
Blitzo rushed over to Joseph's side to see what is happening. "Zoseph! What did you do," the imp asked angrily.
"How the hell do you think I even caused this," the sinner complained.
"That fucking amulet incident!"
Oh so you do remember!"
Millie soon tossed her drunken husband to the air while Moxxie closed his eyes and spread his arms as he flew. Joseph stands at multiple spots until he catches the imp in his arms as the monster's sliced tongue almost hits a human. The man celebrated for not being crushed until Blitzo shot him, scaring the sinner and making Moxxie laugh hysterically.
Millie was battling the giant sea monster on her own and winning while the rest stood by and watched. "I love that woman," Moxxie said while being drunk.
"Oh, she totally pegs ya, doesn't she," Blitzo asked, smirking.
"Hell, I would definitely let her peg me too," Joseph smirks.
"Wait what," the imp boss is surprised by what the sinner says until Joseph looks away, blushing embarrassed. "Well well well. Looks like someone is very kinky!"
Finally, Millie successfully killed the monster by slicing off its stomach from the inside before she tiredly made her way back to shore. "Ohhh yeah! Way to show off, Mils," Blitzo cheered.
"You're the most badass out of all of us, Mill," Joseph shouted.
"Is Mox okay," Millie asked with concern.
"Oh yeah. He's fine," the boss rolled his eyes.
"Well, he's still drunk but he's okay, Mill," the sinner told her while he was still holding Moxxie.
"Thiiiis is fun! I'm sooooo… drinky," the drunk Moxxie cheered as Millie hugged his head while Joseph smiled at the two.
"Okay, this is too wholesome for my liking," Blitzo annoyed.
"Come on, boss. You like this," the sinner told him. "You could use a beautiful wholesomeness in your life."
"Yeah yeah whatever."
"Blitz-o…"
The IMP crew all turned toward Verosika and her crew. "Oh perfect! That must be the whores," the boss said, annoyed.
"That was handled rather… obvious… Don't you think?"
"Well, we're assassins so we can handle anything," Joseph told her while carrying Moxxie. "But what's weird is how did a hellish-like monster end up in the living world?"
"I don't think this belonged to any of us," Millie said as she revealed the pop star's flask before tossing it back to Verosika. "Would be a shame if anyone found out you guys were behind a giant monster fish in the human world."
"Oh Satan! You're gonna be so FUUUUCKED," Moxxie laughed drunkenly.
"Hahaha! I love this drunk Mox," the sinner laughed.
"Yeah, well… you three nasty-ass gremlins will be in shit for not being in disguises," Verosika told them.
"Really? You're gonna pull that card? Listen, hottie, I am a sinner and I know everything about humans. I know they're a bunch of idiotic, simple-headed, weak-minded losers! No one is gonna believe a bunch of drunk and stoned people who saw demons running around. Hell, those spring losers mistook my friends here for something else! Tell 'em what they called ya, Mox!" Joseph tossed his drunken coworker to the ground in front of the pop star.
"A human called me a possum… I am not a possum," Moxxie said before his face planted in the sand.
"Listen, love. We're gonna tell anyone about what actually happened here. All we want from you is to give my boss his parking spot back and all will be forgotten. Do we have a deal?"
"… Fine," she agreed, angered.
"WE FUCKIN WOOOOON," Blitzo laughed triumphantly.
"Ah hell yeah," the sinner cheered.
"Fuck YEAH," Millie cheered as she picked her drunken husband up.
"IN YOUR FACE BITCH," the boss laughs at his ex's face.
Joseph and his friends celebrated their victory while Verosika and her crew walked away. Then, the sinner looked over to see Loona and Vortex saying goodbye to each other until she became sad. "Come on, Loonie Tooney! Let's go back and park our fat fuckin' car in our fat fuckin' space," Blitzo called her while he and the others dragged the bags of dead bodies into the portal.
The sinner rushed over and walked beside Loona. "So uh… how it goes between you and Vortex," Joseph asked her.
"He uh… He's gonna invite me to some cool parties," she told him.
"Oh cool! So uh he seems like a cool nice guy. I'm sure you two would make an awesome couple-"
"He has a girlfriend…"
"Oh uh… I… I'm so sorry, Loona."
"It's fine… I guess…"
"Well uh… if it makes you feel better… I truly meant what I said earlier." She looked at him, confused. "Yo-You's like a best friend to me. I… I always care about my friends, Loona."
She smiles a bit at his sweet words. "Thanks, Joseph."
"Anytime, Loo." Joseph wrapped his arm around her shoulder. The hellhound slowly begins to growl at him touching her, causing the sinner to separate from her while he's very afraid of her. Finally, the IMP goes through the portal as Loona falls backward while Joseph backflips.
Verosika and her crew are walking away as Joseph jumps up from the portal with Blitzo in his arms while the imp is mockingly flipping her off, angering the pop star.