As usual all speech in italics is in the Old Tongue.
Chapter LXI - Then There Were Three
Taija had spent the day working on her taint-destroying web with Aleksi, tweaking it here and there, gradually refining it to be more robust and, more importantly, let off less waste heat. She was more than a bit worried about the sheer amount of heat that might be generated, it was all very well with what she could channel by herself, but if the Choedan Kal did actually have as much power as Rand and Tel said then that would be different matter. If she could keep pushing improvements to her web then that would hopefully be less of a problem.
Rand had given everyone a week to get ready. Taija would have liked to have had longer, but she needed to get Rand and Aleksi, and Tel she grudgingly admitted, out from under the taint and they were all worried that the Forsaken might do something to disrupt preparations. Taija was conscious that, if the Forsaken had any idea what they were all up to, she in particular would be a target, but there was nothing she could do about that.
Still, there was one other important thing she needed to do before then and she'd decided that today was the day for it. She'd been putting it off for too long really, partly because she simply couldn't remember enough of it. She never did like ceremonies, but at least that had been solved.
That was why Taija went to her tent to grab the bundle that she got from the tailor in Cold Rocks Hold before she headed off to round people up.
Egwene was being lectured by the wise ones about something or other, probably dreaming, and seemed relieved when Taija asked them to let her borrow her for the evening. Of course the wise ones had already known Taija would be wanting her. Elayne was canoodling with Mat in a way that would probably outrage Nynaeve although Taija really couldn't see why, they were just cuddling. She'd done far worse in the past and at a younger age than Elayne too. Elayne was rather less keen on being bothered, but dutifully came along. Finally Aleksi was resting, but as always, smiled like the rock he was and sprung to his feet to follow Taija.
A bit of explanation later and, as the Sun started to set they were all getting changed.
It had been a while since Taija had worn that uncomfortable, black, knee-length coat. Technically 3,000 years. She still didn't like it, but some things were too important to neglect just because she wasn't keen on them.
Once everyone had changed into the black coats, Taija looked them over with some satisfaction. They looked a little awkward in the unadorned black, knee-length, high-collared coats but it was a nostalgic sight. With that, it was time to collect the others. Nynaeve first. Taija knew where she'd be, she was always with Lan at this time in the evening unless she'd been set a task or learning of some kind and Taija carefully hadn't done that today.
A quick web and Taija stepped through a gateway to Lan's tent where she could hear muffled voices inside. "Nynaeve, I need you for a moment please." She wasn't going to comment on whether Nynaeve might be a bit hypocritical in her occasional grumbling about Elayne and Mat.
The voices stopped and then after a short pause Nynaeve opened the flaps, looking irritated at being bothered. "What is it Taija sedai? Can't it wait?" She really could be more respectful at times, but then Taija had deliberately chosen an irritating time to bother her so, it was probably at least slightly justified.
Taija wasn't apologising now though, not for this. Instead s hepushed a bundled up black coat at Nynaeve. "Put this on please." The younger woman looked like she was about to argue and Taija firmed up her tone. "Now Nynaeve, this is important!"
For a second Taija thought she'd still try to argue then she scowled and retreated into the tent. Shortly to be followed by a stone faced Lan leaving it. He gave Taija an unreadable look and then stalked off into the dark. Not ideal, but oh well.
Taija waited impatiently for Nynaeve to finish and eventually she came out, still tugging on the coat, clearly unhappy at the way it looked on her. Like the girls she was wearing it over a dress, which looked faintly ridiculous, but that was their problem.
As soon as Nynaeve stepped out of the tent, before she could demand to know what was going on, Taija spoke, intoning the formal words. "Nynaeve al'Meara, aspirant to be aes sedai, you are summoned by the Hall of Servants. The world does not wait upon its servants, the aes sedai wait upon the world. Ask no questions, obey and come without delay for you are to be judged. Your worth shall be weighed and your worthiness shall be judged by those you aspire to have as you peers."
Nynaeve looked at Taija blankly for a second and Elayne gasped behind her. Then Taija remembered that her language was yet another thing that was gone from this world. She wasn't going to let that ruin this. She smoothly switched to what they called the Common Tongue.
"Nynaeve al'Meara, who wishes to become an aes sedai, you are being called by the Hall of Servants. The world won't wait for you, aes sedai must wait on the world. Don't ask any questions, just obey and come with me because you will be judged and assessed by those you want to become." It wasn't quite right, for fuck's sake, but she got the gist. Taija would have just used Nynaeve's language, but this was really important to her. She didn't want to lose yet another connection to her own time and this was all meant to be done in the Old Tongue as they called it. Still… Taija glanced at Elayne, "please could you translate in future."
Nynaeve was staring at Taija. "I didn't realise you actually knew my surname."
What the fuck kind of response was that?! Of course Taija knew her surname, she didn't walk around with her head that far in the clouds! "Shut up Nynaeve, just do as you're told and follow me."
Rand next. Taija Traveled to Caemlyn, still grumbling to herself on the inside, and led her gaggle of followers through the ruins of the palace to where she know he'd be. Of course she hadn't told him this was coming, but she'd given a heads up to the maidens guarding him via Amys and so she could be confident that he wasn't doing anything truly important. It was one of the funny things about this particular ceremony. On paper aspirants were meant to be summoned at an inconvenient moment to demonstrate their dedication to service, but the organisers always made sure that it wasn't anything truly inconvenient. An annoying moment rather than something that would cause real problems.
Fortunately Rand was less churlish than Nynaeve. He just asked Taija if it was important and then put on the black coat, listened to the ritual words, helpfully translated by Elayne, and then followed Taija through her gateway.
They emerged a little way away from the space that Taija had prepared for this. As she led them into the enclosed area she was spinning various wards. Eavesdropping, channeling, Traveling, even a barrier that would obfuscate light for outside observers. It wasn't that she was going to be doing anything that was a real secret, but it was still meant to be a private ceremony, open to aspirants and aes sedai, real ones, only. She glanced over the rim of the space she'd made and then gave a tiny shrug before continuing.
When Taija entered the space she'd made, she gestured at the others to stop while she went to the raised platform, climbing onto it and settling down into the centre chair. It felt wrong sitting there in the middle. She was more than qualified, she'd been an aes sedai for over 150 years, she had a third name, no one would question it, but still… It wasn't her… Worse were the empty chairs on each side of her. A stomach churning reminder of everything that was gone. There should have been three of them there, that was always the way.
Taija couldn't think too much about that or she wouldn't get through this. It was meant to be a happy event, not a miserable one. She channeled and a pair of bright balls of light flashed into being above everyone's heads, banishing the darkness. Tugging on a tied off web behind her made the ancient banner of the aes sedai unfurl to hang down the wall over her head. Red background with the divided circle in black and white flying defiantly for the first time in millennia.
Taija took a deep breath, it was time to begin.
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Tel sat cross-legged on the wall of earth surrounding the space Taija had made. Inverted webs surrounded him, concealing him from sight, sound and smell. As long as he didn't move and she didn't start actively searching for intruders he'd be impossible to find.
It had been a risk doing this, but he just hadn't been able to stop himself. When Taija had awkwardly come to him to ask him about the words for the ceremony, it had set him longing after yet another loss. Of course it was typical of her to have forgotten the words, he was sure part of how she managed to be so brilliant was by filing anything she considered useless in her brain's waste disposal.
Tel didn't miss the way she glanced at the empty chairs. It was enough of a wrench for him seeing them and he'd had rather longer to get used to things. She looked so small and alone in the middle chair, she shouldn't have made it so big.
The gigantic banner gently fluttering from its hanging behind her, Taija began to speak. "We are gathered here today to witness the testing of two aspirants who wish to become aes sedai. They shall be called upon to demonstrate their worth. Their skill as channelers and their potential as servants of all. We th… I shall judge them under the Light of the Creator on behalf of the Hall of Servants." There should have been three of them there on those chairs. Perhaps there could be next time. Technically Taija didn't have the right to do this by herself, but then who else was there? Whatever he'd done to redeem himself, he'd given up the right to call himself aes sedai and every single other one was dead.
Tel listened as Elayne repeated Taija's words in her language. It was probably a good thing, Elayne spoke their language far better than any other noble or modern aes sedai he'd met. Taija on the other hand still sounded like an Andoran peasant and often made grammatical mistakes when she spoke their common tongue.
"The empty seats to my left and to my right stand for remembrance. They should be filled with my brothers and sisters. Our brothers and sisters, ready to serve alongside us. Remember that once they too would have been here." Taija sniffed and then pulled herself together. "Too many have been lost, to the Shadow, to the madness and simply to the grinding of the Wheel. They were loved and they will be remembered." She must have been feeling particularly mawkish to add that to the ceremony. Then again he could understand why she felt that way. So many people gone… So much had been lost… So many of them his fault...
"Nynaeve al'Meara, step forward."
Nynaeve shuffled forward, looking nervous and glancing around her. Of course. Taija hadn't actually told any of them about this. Not even in the abstract. How could she be so bright and yet so obtuse sometimes? Presumably she'd filed this away under 'pointless ceremonies' in her head and so put it to the back of the queue for teaching. That was why she'd had to come to him and ask him to remind her of the words she was meant to use.
He'd had to resist the urge to tease her at the time, but now… Seeing this. It was painful. She'd always hated anything overly formal, but he knew she desperately wanted their time back. Or at least the best bits of it and she was trying to do that here, despite everything. He should be there beside her. If he hadn't fucked everything up…
"Nynaeve al'Meara, for your service the world, the rediscovery of true healing and the use of the full five elements in it your character is judged to be worthy of calling yourself aes sedai. However, to be a servant, is not just a question of character. Many good and worthy people are not aes sedai and there is no shame in that. To join our ranks you must also demonstrate your ability as a channeler. To be aes sedai is to have precision and dexterity, true control over the flows that you command. Please embrace saidar and demonstrate your healing web."
After Elayne finished translating, Nynaeve looked even more confused, but Tel could only assume she'd obeyed. Nynaeve had strength to spare, but of course that wasn't really the test. He wasn't sure what the modern day aes sedai did to test their aspirants, although he was sure he'd heard they had a minimum strength limit. The test here was nothing to do with strength, aspirants would be assessed on how precisely they could form a web that was appropriate to their strength. True skill was shown through the art of spinning, not crude, brute force flinging around of saidin or saidar.
He watched Taija, her face was unusually stern, not showing any emotion as she surveyed Nynaeve. Of course Nynaeve would pass. If Taija hadn't thought she was ready, this wouldn't have happened.
A moment later Taija smiled and nodded. "Thank you Nynaeve, if you could step aside please."
Interesting, she'd just cut out half the exam. Normally there would have been a harsh interview about their future plans, morals and current activities. Practically an interrogation. Perhaps it was that Taija already knew Nynaeve very well, normally the test would be carried out by an independent panel. Or perhaps she just found the whole thing irritating. He'd probably never know, he certainly couldn't ask her.
Fortunately Nynaeve just did as she was told, Tel could imagine the explosion that might come if Taija was interrupted while she was forcing herself to go through with this ceremony.
"Rand al'Thor step forward." Of course Rand didn't look anywhere near as nervous as Nynaeve. Was it his odd flashes of memory from Lews Therin? Or possibly just the confidence he'd been growing into as the Dragon Reborn.
"Rand al'Thor, for your service to the world, taking the burden of being the Dragon reborn onto your shoulders, your character is judged to be worthy of calling yourself a servant of all. However, to be a servant, is not just a question of character. Many good and worthy people are not aes sedai and there is no shame in that. To join our ranks you must also demonstrate your ability as a channeler. To be aes sedai is to have precision and dexterity, true control over the flows that you command. I have spun a ward between us. There are gaps in it. Please seize saidin and touch my forehead with a flow of air without triggering the ward."
That was an impressive show of trust. Taija hated being touched by the vast majority of people, whether physically or with the Power. Tel wondered whether Rand realised.
A moment later the boy seized saidin and channeled, ultra fine flows of spirit feeling out for the invisible ward separating him from Taija, probing with careful delicacy, knowing that more than the lightest brush would trigger the ward. Tel watched with satisfaction, Rand had learnt well. Frighteningly well in fact, the sheer amount of talent he had was incredible.
As for Taija, it was an impressive bit of testing on her part actually. He'd told her he thought Rand was good enough when she'd asked about the words, but she'd just told him it was none of his business and she'd work it out for herself. That had hurt, like so many things hurt these days. Still, it was a clever way for her to assess the spinning of someone whose webs she couldn't see.
A second later a flow of air slipped through the ward to gently touch Taija before Rand released the Power.
Again, Taija smiled and nodded. "Nynaeve, come stand by Rand."
With the two in front of her, she rose from her chair, raising her voice. "Nynaeve al'Meara, Rand al'Thor aspirants to the Hall of Servants, kneel." Again, Elayne translated.
Both got down onto their knees looking up at her. She really did look beautiful standing there on the dais, that huge banner fluttering behind her. Like something out of a story.
Taija picked her way down from the platform, sparing another glance back at the empty chairs, was that a tear trickling down her cheek? It was hard to see from a distance. She went to Nynaeve first and pulled something out of her pocket. Of course Tel knew what it was as it floated over to Nynaeve, a small patch with a circle, half white, half black on a red background.
"Nynaeve al'Meara you have proven yourself worthy under the eyes of the Light and of the Hall of Servants." The patch pressed against her chest on the left, no doubt Taija was spinning a web that would attach it. "You knelt an aspirant, now stand and be welcomed as my sister. You are aes sedai. The first true one to be raised in thousands years, but surely not the last." That last bit wasn't part of the ritual, Tel really hoped Moiraine and Cadsuane never heard about it.
"You have earnt your position, wear the badge of the aes sedai with pride for all who meet you shall know that you stand a representative of the Hall of Servants, but remember, to be aes sedai is to serve."
Nynaeve clambered back to her feet a little awkwardly and Taija enveloped her in a tight hug, whispering something to her that Tel couldn't hear from his position. A moment later Taija had stepped away to face Rand.
"Rand al'Thor you have proven yourself worthy under the eyes of the Light and of the Hall of Servants." She pulled another badge out of her pocket and floated it to him. "You knelt an aspirant, now stand and be welcomed as my brother. You are aes sedai. The first man to be able to claim the title since the madness. Next week we will end that together and there will be many more to come." She glanced over at Aleksi.
Rand got to his feet smoothly and Taija embraced him too. Tel looked on with blurred eyes. He should have been there with her…
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Taija really hated this kind of ritual, but it needed to be done. At least she'd managed to hold herself together through it. The empty seats were hard, but they needed to be there, a reminder of what had been lost. She glanced back at them and scrubbed her sleeve across her eyes.
Hopefully she'd be able to palm this sort of thing off in the future. Still, she was more than pleased with how things had gone. Technically speaking she was no longer alone, even if she still felt the same yawning emptiness in her.
Taija ran her eyes over the rim of the wall she'd made. She was fairly sure Tel would be hiding there somewhere. She'd told him he wasn't welcome of course, but he was so predictable sometimes. In the end she'd decided not to look, she was just too tired. Tired of being angry, tired of seeing everything she'd lost and tired of being lonely. So she'd left it, what was the harm anyway?