Kor startled awake. He doesn't remember drifting off, but he must have, and just when he had started to dream of being snuggled in his Papa's arms, his eyes shot open.
The dream as left behind as everything of his home was.
His eyes slowly focused on this new place that was his home now.
But nothing about it felt like his home.
Well, almost nothing.
The bed wasn't soft with the goose feather pillows and the clean cotton quilts he was used to--quite the contrary with its brittle straw bedding, the coarse wolf pelt laid atop, and a rough and worn sheet made of jute--but there was one thing in this bed that Kor's drowsy brain could almost, almost feel of home.
Aphid.
In Kor's sleepy stupor, and in combination with the dream of being in his father's arms again, he had almost completely forgotten about everything that had transpired.
Almost thought he was in his father's arms again…that everything else had been the dream. The nightmare.
But it quickly settled on him, what with the stark contrast of his father's big and burly chest--a chest Kor could curl up on as a bed itself--and this boy's thin frame.
But despite this contrast, the lanky boy still felt of a warmth and of a safe haven almost equal to Kor's father.
Which must have been what allowed Kor to drift off, for the last he remembered, he was clinging to Aphid in a tight little ball, desperately trying to withhold another round of racking sobs—He did not want to call that hag upon them again with his noise.
Even then, he could still feel the bite of her slap, though maybe it was his inexperience with such a hand or the uncomfortable press of the hard bed beneath him. Either way, he didn't want to feel the sting of that wasp again.
Kor titled his head up to see Aphid soundly asleep. He must have scooted and lain them back, so he too could rest more comfortably, but Kor couldn't see how Aphid could be comfortable at all.
What with this bed, and this clingy child in his ribs… And those heated marks on his face.
The flush of Grelod's slaps had set in on Aphid's cheek, the corner of his mouth puffed with that wasp's sting.
Kor felt so incredibly awful; feeling like it was his fault.
He had no idea how Aphid had taken it in such stride-- oh no.
Was it because maybe he's used to it?
Poor Kor couldn't help but to quickly duck his head down and burrow even further into Aphid. He's never had a thought like that before.
He so wished to be home right now.
He just wanted to be home.
Snuggled atop his Papa, under the canopy of his Papa's bed; to be counting those star patches sewn upon the curtains—a calming technique Kolgrim used to wind a rambunctious or scared Kor down for bed.
But Kor was never scared like he was now.
Being scared at home was along the lines of letting his imaginations run wild, like after Stieg would tease him with stories of draugr popping from their footlockers or vampires waiting in the rafters…
Not like this.
Papa.
He had to come back.
He had to.
His voice.
His hugs.
His laugh.
Their home.
Those star patched curtains…
"Shh shh shh."
Aphid's gentle shushes suddenly pushed through Kor's spiraling thoughts.
"I got you..."
Kor's shaking sniffles must have woken him, and the being in his ribs, but the older boy made no complaint. He only tried to soothe the kid.
"I got you, Kor," Aphid whispered softly.
Kor, though, was breaking down again.
"I know I'm not who you want right now," Aphid continued to confort, gently wrapping his arms around Kor, "I know. But I'm here. And I know that doesn't make anything feel okay right now, but I'll hold you as best I can while it feels like the world is breaking apart, okay?"
"I…I j-just--" Kor whimpered, "I w-want to go h-hoooome. I want my P-Papaaaa."
"I know," the older boy soothed, "I'm so sorry."
Aphid scooted them up to the headboard, so he could better hold the boy in his arms.
"I'm sorry, little brother," he said and held Kor closely, "Just know that I'm here. I'm here for you, okay?"
An awakened Bark snidely remarked through the dim lit room.
"And Grelod's gonna be here for you soon, too," he whispered, grumpy.
"Bark, uh-uh," Aphid spoke back in a stern whisper, "None of that teasing right now, you hear me? I am absolutely serious."
"I'm not teasing," Bark replied, "He gets any louder and she's gonna come in here and whip his as-"
"Barakväll!" Aphid snipped, rather sharply this time. He didn't mean to so loudly, but it slipped out, and it was very quickly followed by a loud bang upon the wall of Grelod's room.
There was a dreaded silence. Aphid curled Kor against him, protectively waiting for those doors to fling open.
But they didn't. Mercy of the Gods, it was only a warning thwack.
Aphid felt terribly upset that Kor was getting such a dreadful dose of Grelod's mood on his very first night here, but he'd have seen it eventually.
The protective older boy just wished he could have at least prevented Grelod strikes upon Kor earlier.
"It's not always like this," Aphid whispered to the trembling boy, "She just has her bad days, is all—"
"I don't want the bad daaays," Kor whined as quietly as he could, but it was hard to whine quietly, "...I want to go hooome."
"I know," Aphid replied, and after fiddling in his mind for SOMETHING to distract the boy with, he figured a funny anecdote about himself could suffice.
"Want to know something funny about my home?" he asked.
"W-what?" Kor responded, but not with curiosity. The question didn't quite register in his ears yet.
"You want to know something funny? About my old home?" the older boy repeated, "And my name, which you may have noticed is a little odd, right?"
Kor's little brow arched, his flustered replaced with perplexity, and he nodded.
Aphid chuckled.
"All the sons," he explained, "were given peculiar, and often gross, names."
Kor's trembling suddenly stopped, and his shaky voice became a little steadier.
"…Really?" he asked.
"Yep," Aphid confirmed, "It was a tradition from some old superstition that our names warded off trolls. I don't have a clue who thought that, and why they thought an ugly name would ward off an uglier troll, but that's why I'm named after a pesky bug…"
"Really?" Kor asked again, a bit of disbelief in his voice.
"Mhm," Aphid replied, "It's true. All of Trollheim did it. I actually like my name though. My Mama chose it, because it sounded close to my Dad's name, Arvid—he wasn't born in our village, you see, so he had a regular name. He didn't like it, she said, but she won him over when she reminded him what the neighbor's son was named."
"What was he named?" Kor asked.
"...Skeever-Butt-Breath," Aphid stated and a high pitched, defiant whisper shot from a nearby bed.
"No he wasn't!" Eydis snipped.
Aphid had to hold his giggle at bay, but hints of it was in his whisper.
"I knew you were awake over there," he teased, "I'd be smelling that rat tail from your snoring mouth otherwise."
"Stop being gross!" Eydis hissed and flopped over.
Aphid chuckled quietly and finished his story.
"No, though he actually really was named Ratgut," he said, "And his dad's name was Hockspit…so being named after a bug isn't so bad."
"It fits," Bark remarked, "You're really bugging Eydis."
Aphid nearly slipped a full laugh, but managed to stifle it just in time.
"Heh," he snorted and commented, "That was a good one, Bark."
He, however, felt a trembling renewal in Kor, and Aphid's attention quickly drew back to the boy up against him.
But it wasn't a tremble of fear or cries.
Kor was quietly giggling.
Aphid smiled.
For the boy to giggle while in the midst of the absolute worst, and scariest, part of his life…This world wasn't going to take him down easily.
"I'm not bugging you, am I?" Aphid asked Kor.
Kor shook his head, his giggles ceased, but his little smile remained.
He shimmied more comfortably against Aphid and let out quite the sleepy sigh.
"Think you can get back to sleep?" Aphid asked softly.
After a moment, he felt a small nod, so Aphid laid back down, so the boy could cuddle back upon his chest.
And Kor did. He nuzzled down, wrapped an arm over Aphid's abdomen, and held to him tightly.
"…good night," Kor quietly whispered and shyly added, "thank you for being here."
"For as much as you need me," Aphid replied, "…and more. Good night, little brother."
The older boy then whispered out to the rest of the room.
"Good night all," he said, "I love you, brats."
They all replied in unison, but with slightly different replies.
"Nighty," said Eydis.
"Goodnight," Jaren said.
"Night," Bark spoke simply, but he was the only one to add, "And night, new kid."
All went quiet and Kor, fortunately, fell quickly back to sleep…
When he next awoke, it was to Aphid's careful whispering.
Morning had come, and the older boy and other kids were already awake.
Aphid was still in bed with Kor, still holding the kid against him, but he was whispering instructions to Bark on how to get the breakfast porridge started.
"Use the water I set aside," the older boy whispered, "It's right there—yes, there, the bucket on the hearth with the cloth over it. That one. It's the only bucket, Bark—Yes, there. Put the water in the pan and set the pan—carefully—on the rack over the—carefully! Please don't burn yourself—Oh, Kor."
Aphid noticed Kor stirring, and he realized the boy had slid off his chest and was sleepily looking up at him.
"I'm sorry," Aphid apologized, "Did I wake you?"
"…is it morning?" Kor asked, groggy.
"Yes," Aphid replied, "but you can sleep a little bit longer if you want."
"Aphiiiiid," Bark loudly droned, interrupting Aphid and Kor, "What do I do now??"
"Hush it down, for one," Aphid said, "Just let the water get to a boil and—Don't touch the pot!"
"…I'm awake," Kor finally replied, which pulled Aphid's attention back on him.
"Hm?" Aphid responded, his mind splintered between the conversations, but quickly recollecting, "Oh? Are you sure? You can rest all you need, honey, I got you--"
"Aphid," Jaren was suddenly beside the bed, and he was holding up a boot, "I can't tie my other shoe."
"I'll help you soon, little peep," Aphid replied, "Just give me a few—"
"Aphid," Eydis now chimed in, also now at the bed, exhaustedly brushing at her, and trying to pull it up, "My hair won't stay up."
"One moment, button nose," Aphid replied, and he once again put his attention on Kor, "How are you feeling? Would you like an extra pillow? I can get mine for you."
"I'm okay," Kor yawned and whispered as inconspicuous as he could, "…I need to pee."
"Aaah, okay," Aphid smiled, "You go on and handle that, freckles."
Kor nodded and slipped himself off the bed and headed for the relief room—He was shown it, and had used it, before bed last night. It was the small room behind the other set of doors next to Grelod's room, about the size of a closet.
As he slipped away, Bark had approached the bed now to tease Jaren about his boot ordeal.
"You can tie one," he said, "but not the other?"
"Don't tease," Aphid said to him.
"I'm not," Bark insisted, "I'm just wondering how that happens? Does one make you solve a riddle or something?"
"He's just learning, Bark," Aphid explained, "And he did really well on the first one alone."
"Thank you," Jaren quietly replied.
"Puh," Bark remarked, "I learned when I was, like, three."
"Barakväll," Aphid firmly reminded, "I said don't tease. It's first thing in the mornin'. Be nice."
Bark folded his arms and spun his back towards the older boy.
"Hmph," he humphed, "I can't ever do nothing."
"You can help with breakfast," Aphid replied, as he lifted up Jaren and sat him next to himself on the bed.
Bark spun back around, his arms spread out in exasperation.
"But what do I do noooow?" he whined in impatience.
Aphid held a finger up to his lips.
"Shhhush!" he reminded the boy of his volume, "Boy, keep your voice down. You know better. Is the water boiling?"
Bark huffed and, carefully, stomped his way back to the pot to peek in.
"Not yet," he said. Aphid knew it wouldn't be, but he also knew Bark would go back and forth with him if he told him otherwise. Bark had to see it for himself. Kids.
"Then we wait," Aphid stated, and of course the specifics just had to be known.
"For how long?" Bark asked.
"Until it boils," Aphid answered.
"That's not an answer," Bark huffed, "How long until it boils?"
Aphid gave a casual shrug as he demonstrated to Jaren the tying of his boot.
"Dunno," he shrugged, "It's not exactly exact, but I do know it will take longer if you stare at it."
If Bark didn't seem impatient before, he certainly did now. He flung his arms wildly about and gave a stomp of his foot.
"Wha—how??" he squeaked as quiet as he could in this exasperated fit, "That doesn't make sense!"
"Maybe it's shy," Jaren commented, and Bark stomped again, a little harder.
"That doesn't make sense!!"
Aphid's eyes shot to Bark. He snapped his fingers and pointed sternly at that foot of Bark's that had stomped.
"Simmer down," he said, "before YOU boil over."
Bark blew an impatient air from his nose, but he otherwise did simmer, knowing better than to do anything otherwise.
Aside from the plop he exaggerated as he sat on the end of the bed…
"Barakväll…," Aphid sighed, "…just one morning, please. Without trying to get us all bea—"
"ApHiiiD," Eydis whined at his side.
"WhAaAaaat?" he immediately mimicked her tone back to her, and Bark took joy in holding a shushing finger up at that older brother.
Aphid stuck a quick tongue out at him, before putting his own finger to his lips at Eydis.
She whined quieter, but whined nonetheless.
"My haaaair," she reminded.
Aphid encouraged Jaren to give a go at tying his boot himself, and then he scooted to the edge of the bed, where Eydis stood between his legs as he worked on her hair.
Kor returned at this time to see the pile of kids on his bed. He could hear them all while he was in the closet, and somewhat worried that Grelod could certainly hear them too, but she hadn't come out yet, or even banged on the wall.
"Hey, new ki—Kor," Bark beckoned the boy's attention, "…Check that pot, would ya?"
"Bark…," Aphid said, "Don't bother him."
Bark flung his hands up with that exasperation he seemed to display often.
"I'm not bothering him. I only asked him—"
"It always starts that way," Aphid said, whilst brushing Eydis's hair, "Just let him come back to bed, alright? Remember how exhausted you were—"
"I'm okay…," Kor replied, taking a peek at the water pot.
Truthfully, he surprisingly didn't feel exhausted. Numb, maybe, if anything.
"It's alright, Kor," Aphid assured, "Honest. You can snuggle back down if you want to."
"Mm.mm," Kor shook his head and returned to the end of his bed, "…I'm awake."
"Alright,…if you think you're sure," Aphid replied, braiding Eydis's side knot, "…Would you like me to give you a braid, Kor? I'm not the best at them but they hold."
"…No, thank you," he politely declined, "…but can I borrow the brush when you're done?"
Kor may not feel exhausted, but Aphid could tell the boy was running on muscle-memory and habit, real thoughts taking their time waking up with him.
"Of course," Aphid replied. He was already done with Eydis, and held out that brush to Kor, providing him the distraction he needed before a real thought could snag the boy just yet.
"Thank you," Kor blandly spoke, but startled a bit when Bark had thumped him with his foot.
"Bark!" Aphid hissed.
"Well?" the thumper asked.
"…W-What?" Kor replied with confusion.
"Was the water boiling?" Bark asked insistently.
"…Oh," Kor said, "...No, it's not, but it was getting clo—"
"Uuuuurgh," Bark growled, "We're never gonna eat."
Aphid chuckled slightly.
"Goodness," he said, "You're more impatient being involved than waiting on it, but breakfast comes every morning, does it not? Kor was about to say it's getting close, so it'll all be done in very soon, alright? Why don't you go set the table to pass the time?"
Bark sighed, but shrugged and hopped up to go do it nonetheless.
"And Barakväll…," Aphid said, the use of Bark's full name prompting the boy to halt with a small groan. He looked to the older boy reluctantly.
Aphid's eyes and tone were indeed very stern.
"Don't kick anybody again," he ordered.
"I didn't kick him!" Bark whispered as loudly as he could, "It was just a tap—"
"Heard what I said," Aphid said, "You want to tap, you use your fingers. Knocking them with your foot is rather rude, alright?"
"…fiiiine," Bark replied and went on his way to set the dining table.
"Oi, Mara have mercy," Aphid sighed and nudged the lingering Eydis forward, "We're done, button nose. You go on and help your cousin now."
Eydis checked her braid with a bounce, and seeming satisfied, she scurried off without protest.
"Thank you, Aphid," she cheerfully whispered, but she didn't go help her cousin…
Instead, she seemed more interested in heading straight to the raggedy teddy upon her bed and fiddling with its crooked ear bow.
Aphid began to say something to her, but decided not to bother, putting his attention on Kor instead.
"Do you like porridge, Kor?" he asked.
Kor sat on the edge of his bed and nodded a bit absently.
Aphid urged Jaren away this time.
"Go on and help Bark, little peep," he said and gently shooed him off the bed.
The older boy then scooted to Kor and wrapped an arm around him.
They were quiet for a moment, as Kor absently stared at the floor. Aphid let the moment linger before speaking.
"Porridge was the only thing," Aphid began telling Kor, trying to give him something to focus on besides the worn wood floor, "…that my mother couldn't cook."
"…hm?" Kor hummed.
"Mama was a good cook," Aphid said, "She really was, but porridge, as simple as it is, was not her specialty. Always too sloppy or too dry, and utterly flavorless. My sister and I, and even Dad before he died, always tried to choke it down, but we all knew it was awful. And Mama would say the same thing every single time she saw our apprehension: 'It's porridge or forage.' We'd all have rather foraged, heh, but for some reason, she seemed so determined to make us a good porridge, so we obliged her every time."
Kor seemed to be listening, a tiny smile etched the corners of his mouth.
"She never did get it right," Aphid finished with a chuckle, "but it did teach me how NOT to make it...or at least these kids never complain about it. You'll give me an honest opinion, right?"
Kor's smile widened and he nodded.
Aphid gave him a little squeeze return and patted his back.
"I'm gonna go get that porridge cookin' now," he said, "If you need me for anything at all, you can come get me, alright?"
Kor nodded again and Aphid stood to leave.
"Oh, by the way," the older boy remembered, "Your boots are under the bed. I tucked them under there last night. Bark once twisted his ankle pretty good on trippin' over his, so please forgive the hide-the-seek."
Kor nodded again, and Aphid gave his hair a little ruffle before heading off to cook.
But Kor remained seated as he was for a few moments. He was still feeling rather blank, despite the humor of Aphid's little story.
Aphid had utterly disappeared during those few moments though, but very soon returned to the cooking pot.
He looked back upon Kor with a smile and Kor smiled back.
As blank as he was feeling, he did know he liked Aphid. That boy emanated warmth and comfort, even at a distance.
Kor sighed. His Papa had that same aura about him…
He took another small breath and began brushing his hair. That blanketing numbness was at least keeping the tears at bay this morning.
As he groomed, and then idly groomed some more, Aphid cooked up their breakfast and the other kids finished setting the bowls, and cups, and utensils upon the table. Eydis had decided to join Bark and Jaren just as they had completed that task, and the three decided to start playing some sort of game with each other over who could stretch up the highest without leaving the ground.
Bark was winning of course, being bigger than the other two, at least until Eydis decided to cling her weight to him and stoop him down for tiny Jaren to win.
"Simmer it down, guys," Aphid reminded them of their increasing noise. He walked over and plucked a pin from Eydis's hair to lockpick that pantry again.
He did so and retrieved from the pantry a basket of apples and a knife.
He sat the apples down on the table, but slipped the knife behind his belt and he made his way back to the cooking pot.
"Almost ready," Aphid whispered with a smile to Kor, who was finally putting his ponytail in place.
Aphid stirred the simmering porridge once more, before he grabbed a pot rag and grasped the handle of the pot, carefully removing it from the rack. He toted it to the dining table, firmly instructing the other children to mind the hot pot. After setting it down on a trivet upon the table, he removed the knife from his belt and sat down to slice and dice those apples.
Kor thought maybe he should offer to help, as he had done with last night's dinner, but Aphid was making quick work already. Instead, Kor fished his boots out from under the bed and sat back down to put them on. He was just beginning to lace up the second boot when those doors finally flung open…
There was an immediate silence within the home, as it seemed to be the case anytime those doors opened. The three kids rough housing in the dining area quickly scrambled to their seats at the table, and Aphid paused with a cautious eye.
"Good morning, Miss Grelod," he said, "Breakfast is ready. I was just about to serve it up."
She didn't acknowledge him. Instead, she stepped out from her room a bit and seemed to be looking over all of them at the table, as if scanning for something specific. Aphid gazed back, looking for something specific as well. Trying to get a read on her. Grelod looked as if she was about to say something, but then her eyes turned towards Kor's bed, and upon seeing him, she seemed to have gotten the answer as to his whereabouts she was about to ask.
Kor had been looking at her as well, but as soon as her eyes had shifted to him, he immediately put his attention back on his boot. He kept lacing that boot, slowly, wanting to keep the reason for having his eyes elsewhere, but he could still feel her eyes still upon him.
Why was she staring at him?
Was he doing something wrong? He was just tying his boot. Perhaps maybe he shouldn't do it with his foot on the bed? Or did she know he was trying to avoid her gaze?
He saw her feet approaching in his peripheral vision, and the ice gripped his stomach in that moment.
Why was she approaching him?
What should he do?
He glanced up, not at her, but to Aphid across the way. The older boy looking back with a questioning look on this situation too.
Aphid was beginning to stand when Kor finally braved looking up at Grelod, her permanent scowl upon him indeed.
"…yes?" Kor pushed himself to ask and quickly remembered to add, "…m-ma'am?"
She suddenly sat down beside him, and Kor heard a gasp from Bark at the table.
"Aphid!" Bark whispered quite loudly, "She's gonna whoop him!"
Aphid could be heard clattering up from his seat and beginning to call upon Grelod, but either the old crone's ears did hear Bark's gasp or she simply saw how pale Kor had become.
"Relax, boy," she said with that voice always laced in impatience, "I already gave you quite the welcoming applause yesterday, hm?"
The silent moment after she said that seem to urge Kor to respond, but he had not a clue how to.
Yes or no?
But thankfully, she spoke again and released him from that awkward wondering.
"The world is harsh," she said, "as you've certainly come to learn. Perhaps a little late in life, but your first dose was quite a doozy. Losing all you've ever known in a night."
Kor hadn't a clue what she was saying this for. Her tone, though not riled, held no warmth in it.
He couldn't distinguish whether she was being sympathetic or going to remind him again that his father was gone for good.
He only nodded.
"The world doesn't allow you to time grieve," Grelod spoke again, "The world. Out there. Not for a moment. But, perhaps, …within here…, I could have let you have a night."
Bark's whispering could be heard again, faintly, but riddled in surprise.
"Is she…apologizing??"
"I am not soft," the old crone stated firmly to Kor, "…but I am not cruel either. No matter what you've certainly heard by now."
--and felt. A flash of the smackings crossing his the boy's mind.
"I am exactly what you children need me to be," Grelod affirmed, "and my job, while you shelter here, is to ready you for the world out there. I've a feeling your father never handled you like I did, no?"
Kor titled his head up to her. All her words were only registering only just enough, and he finally answered when it settled in.
"…No, ma'a—I mean, only…once..."
For a second, it looked as if she was about to roll her eyes, but then the smallest hint of a smile twitched her lips.
"Ah, good," she said, "Am I to take that to mean you listen well?"
"…u-um," Kor fumbled. Not because he wasn't listening, but the poor kid just did not know, for what felt like the thousandth time in a week, how to respond.
"Look… Kor," the old woman spoke, for the first time, with a voice that didn't have that under note of constant agitation. It wasn't kind either, but it probably as close to what this woman could mistake it to be.
"I can see you're one of those good kids," she said, "Maybe it's a trick of those innocent little dots on your face, or a trick of the light, or simply just a trick..."
Kor began to slowly shake his head, that, no, it's not a trick, but he honestly wasn't sure what she saying exactly.
"No?" Grelod repeated his shake of the head, "No, I can tell. But, Kor, understand—and you've surely learned this already, poor little orphan--the world doesn't take mercy on the good. The only thing we can do to lessen its hand, is brace for it."
Kor visibly looked utterly unable to absorb whatever this was she was telling him…
"You know what, nevermind it," Grelod sighed, "Go on to the breakfast table now, before one of them brats sneaks your food."
Kor nodded, quickly finished his lace, hopped up, and walked away…fast.
He had wanted to run the moment her foot set out that door…
Aphid was standing at the end of the table, serving the porridge into everyone's bowls, but turned to the rattled Kor with a soft smile, holding out an arm to shelter him.
"You can sit between me and Bark, right there," he said and gently ushered him to the spot.
"And here's your bowl—" Aphid started to say, but the sudden forceful shutting of that pantry door interrupted and startled him.
Oh no.
"Aphid…," Grelod's agitated voice returned.
Aphid's eyes actually widened a little.
He thought he had shut it, but it had apparently been ajar.
"…Yes, ma'am?" he answered her, turning around. He refrained from any nervous inflection in his voice, but there was a tenseness in his entire demeanor.
Grelod let it sink in for a moment, and she ensured he saw her hand upon the handle.
"…I'm going to have my breakfast with you brats this morning," she finally said, "you can put the tray there back in the other room."
It was obvious there was an unsaid "I caught you", but also an unsaid, "I'll let it slide…"
"Y-yes, ma'am," Aphid replied. His voice couldn't help but jump slightly with relief.
She must be in a much better mood this morning…
He quickly stashed away that tray, and debated stashing the knife away with it.
He knew she knew.
As he had said before, of course she did, but he wasn't about to parade being let off the hook with boldly toting THAT around.
But…he couldn't leave it where one of the kid's…
"Aphid!" Grelod called, "I said put the tray away, not organize the shelves. Get your skinny behind back to breakfast before you starve!"
"Yes, ma'am!" Aphid called back and quickly stashed the knife inside a pot before heading back to the table.
He finished serving the porridge to the children, and now Grelod, who sat on the opposite side of the table from Bark, Kor, and Aphid. She was next to Jaren, who was between her and Eydis.
Aphid was just finishing putting a scoop of diced apples in Eydis's bowl across from him, when Grelod called his attention once again.
"Aphid, boy, where's your bowl?" she said, "You are not going sit there, in my presence, eating nothing but bread. Trying to make the world think I'm starving you, no doubt. You get your gangly hide back up and get you a bowl of FOOD."
"Yes, ma'am," he immediately conceded and went right back to the utility room to fetch himself a bowl.
But as he was doing so, Grelod looked across the table at Bark.
"…Bark," she said, and he immediately flinched, pausing the spoon of porridge in his mouth.
"Yes?" he answered, "…um, ma'a—"
"Lift your arms," Grelod ordered.
"My…arms?"
"Yes, I said lift your arms, boy," the old lady instructed and demonstrated with her own arms, "…like this."
Bark seemed rather confused, but did as he was told.
"Mmhm," Grelod hummed affirmatively, "Look at that. Aphid, you ain't keeping up with feeding yourself or these runts! Look how slender Bark's arms are. A Nord boy's arms are suppose to get bigger as he grows, not smaller."
Aphid was returning with his bowl as she said this, only for her to halt him before he sat to instruct him some more.
"Get on back in there," she said, "and get that big frying pan out. These leeches need more than just porridge and apples if you're hoping for them to grow, you know. Go on and get the sausage out of the ice box. Oh, and grab the eggs, one whole basket."
"Yes, ma'am," Aphid said without any hint of exasperation, but he did pause just as he was about to turn towards the pantry.
"…Pan, sausage, and eggs, Aphid," Grelod reminded him.
"Um, yes," Aphid replied and looked back upon her, "Uh…it's just...I need the pantry key, ma'am."
Grelod raised a brow.
"Do you?" she asked, and that ask was laced with words she didn't have to say.
Aphid took a moment to gauge this. Had she not let earlier slide? Was she about to call him out on his lockpicking? She knows he does it, but was she now choosing to punish him for it on a whim? Maybe she hadn't slept off her mood.
"Yes, ma'am," he finally answered.
She stared at him for a moment longer, before removing a set of keys off her belt and holding them out.
"Mmhm," she hummed as he came around and obtained them, "Do the eggs after the sausage, and scramble them. You can use a splash of milk to make them fluffier."
"Yes, Miss Grelod," Aphid replied as he reached for the keys.
That was when she grabbed him arm, and a heavy pause weighed down the room.
The two stared at each other for a moment, as if exchanging quick words purely through the eyes.
Aphid was just about to break eye contact, losing whatever silent debate was happening, when Grelod released him and spoke.
"And butter," she said, "For the eggs, so they don't stick."
"Yes, ma'am," Aphid replied and set off to work on the larger breakfast, sighing when he was out of earshot from her.
The kids had been watching, tense, listening to this whole exchange.
However, when Grelod began eating upon her porridge, the other children seemed to relax as much they could and began eating as well.
Bark even began playfully teasing the listless Kor, who was only lazily twisting his spoon in the food.
"C'mon," he nudged, "You trying to save room for what's coming? I can eat all of it!"
"I…," Kor began to say he wasn't hungry, but he didn't know if that would upset Grelod.
And Aphid was now working so much on a whole spread.
"I can eat," Kor responded, and he took a bite of the porridge and apples.
Aphid did make a good porridge…
Kor took another bite and and listened to the sounds of breakfast around him. It was mostly quiet, aside from the occasional clank of a spoon and the kids trying to properly chew their food in the presence of someone who would strictly punish ill manners.
Breakfast was always a bit noisy at home.
Any meal, really.
Kor's Papa was an extraordinarily gentle man to all but his pots and pans, and the man couldn't seem to dip a spoon in a bowl without sounding like he was trying to dig treasure from the bottom. Meal times were noisy with Kolgrim.
Somehow, Kor managed not to inherit or mimic this unintentional behavior, but he never thought anything of it.
Until now.
Nothing was ever going to be the same.
Kor was just about to linger on that thought, when the sudden loud clanking of a frying pan bouncing off the floor erupted through the orphanage.
That sounded a bit like home at least…
"Don't you dent that pan, boy!" Grelod hollered over, "It's the best one we got!"
"Sorry, Miss Grelod!" Aphid called back.
"Are you okay?" the old crone actually asked.
"Yes, ma'am," he answered, "It just slipped out of my arm, is all."
"Well see that it doesn't fall off the cooking rack," she replied, "Last thing we need is a melted foot AND my good pan dented."
She grumbled lowly after that, "...been working for the past two weeks on dinging out the dent one of you mongrels put in my kettle."
"Miss Grelod," Jaren suddenly spoke to her, and his doing so gave Bark a startle for some reason…
The brown haired Nord set his green eyes sternly on the Redguard, as if trying to telepathically interject him, sure he was about to out just who dented that kettle…
But Jaren only said, "I can tie both my shoes now."
"Can you, hm?" Grelod responded.
"A useful skill for rest of your life," she praised with that ever present sarcasm.
Bark relaxed, but Grelod put her eyes upon him and washed him with nervous renewal.
"And how much have you learned," she put him on the spot, "…since you were three?"
…she had heard him earlier that morning?
Jaren tapped the old crone's arm.
"I'm five, Miss Grelod," he reminded.
"I know," she replied and lazily brushed his tapping away.
It was possible she was just making a slight at Jaren, but Bark decided to answer the question at hand.
"I, uh,…," he said, "…I can boil water?"
Grelod titled her chin up, paused, and then fully nodded.
"Also a useful skill," she commended.
"Oh!" Eydis decided to get in on this praise, regardless of whether it was genuine or not, "Oh, I can…um…I…I can braid my hair!"
"No you can't," Jaren commented, "Aphid still braids your hair."
Eydis was about to snip something back at the boy, but Grelod spoke before she could.
"Well, manipulation is of a skill too," the old crone said. Eydis seemed satisfied with the response, though she most likely didn't understand it.
"Kor," Grelod moved on to him, "Any useful skills?"
Kor looked as on the spot as Bark had been.
"Uh…I…," he fumbled, "...I…I don't kno—"
"He's a good helper," Aphid's voice spoke, literally, over him.
Kor startled, as he had not realized Aphid had come back to set plates out. The older boy had been reaching over him to set one down when he spoke, and Kor accidentally head-butted him in the gut upon the startle.
"Omph!" Aphid slunked and dropped the plate with a clatter, but patted the boy and apologized for startling him, "Sorry about that…"
"Mm, if that's help," Grelod remarked, "I've had enough gut wrenches in my life…"
"No, he really is a good help," Aphid assured, "He assisted me with dinner very well last night."
"He's going to be assisting you," Grelod replied, "with scraping the burnt bits off that pan if you burn them sausages, boy."
"They're not burning," Aphid replied back, setting down the other plates, "I just got them in the pan."
A loud sizzling pop was heard just after he said that. Surely to mock him.
His reaction to it must have been comical, as Bark, Eydis, and Jaren giggled at his bolting upright and the scoff that had escaped him.
Even Grelod…seemed to chuckle. She quickly covered her mouth and ordered the boy back in there.
"Get back in there before it hops out the pan," she said, a slight presence of a shake on her voice.
The other kids may not have picked up on it, but Aphid did.
Grelod must be in a much, much better mood.
Breakfast sailed on easy waters as Aphid finished cooking and serving up the sausages and eggs.
Once Aphid finally took his seat, the kids ate with Grelod in their presence as if she almost wasn't there.
The only differences to their usual behavior without her being their lack of wiggling about in their seats, the new kid among them, and Aphid actually eating food.
Well, aside from the bits he snuck underneath the table to the other children…
But it was...normal.
Perhaps abnormally normal, but no less wanted.
When all were finished, that was when Grelod asked to speak to Aphid in her room.
This paled the kids. Even Aphid.
The last time he was taken to her room, he had gotten the switch. All because he had absent mindlessly stepped out the front door one evening to toss out the mop water. She had been "gracious" to hide him behind closed doors. Aphid had toughened quickly to many of her beatings, but that wicked implement could still break him, so she had been…gracious…to hide his tears away from the other children. Was her apparent "good mood" going to be that act of graciousness again?
Aphid wondered if this was about the pantry, after all.
He thought that, or a belting, was what was going to happen when she snatched his arm earlier.
So why the calm demeanor since then?
Just to get breakfast out of him first?
What was with all this back and forth today? Was he just losing his touch with reading her?
"You see a ghost, boy?" Grelod said, noting Aphid's pale color.
Before Aphid could respond, she finally ended his mental spiral.
"We're just going to do things a little differently today," she explained, "Something you runts will probably like, so come on now, son, so I can discuss the ground rules with you. Without these mites nipping into the conversation every two words."
Do things differently?
Aphid's color returned, especially upon her use of "son", a rare endearment that he noted she only used for him, and when he was in no danger of her hand. But there was still perplexity upon his face.
She stood and motioned Aphid along with a curl of her finger. With her other hand, she made a shooing motion at the other children.
"The rest of you get these dishes in the wash basin," she ordered, "And clean yourselves up too. I don't need you all looking like gutter rats in public, even if we are in a city built atop gutters."
None of the children looked any less perplexed.
They're going out today?
"We're going out today," Aphid confirmed when he had returned.
He had the children gathered and all sitting in the foyer, explaining what he had been told by Grelod.
"Like…," Bark already interrupted, "…in the yard?"
"No," Aphid replied, and he pointed at the front door, "Out. To the market."
"Out there?!" Eydis smiled, excited, "We haven't been out there in foreeeever!"
"Not since Bark got us all in trouble the last time," Jaren remarked, looking to Kor who was sitting next to him.
"I didn't--! You're--!" Bark barked, "You're the one that told on us!"
"Ay, ay," Aphid snapped his fingers to stifle the constant interruption, "Quiet now. I'm serious. Listen up."
The kids sat at attention, their curiosity and excitement overriding their natural desire to grief Aphid. Kor was only casually curious, as he knew nothing of their routines.
"We're going to the market to buy us new clothes," Aphid explained, "and some other odds and ends. Miss Grelod won't be with us."
"She won't?" Bark questioned.
"She'll going to the keep," Aphid continued explaining, "She's got a meeting with the Jarl, so however long she's gone, I am completely in charge."
"Yay!" Eydis clapped, but Aphid shook his head, made a shushing motion, and indicated with a toss of his head that Grelod was still nearby.
"Now," Aphid said, "You three very well know the rules when going out, but it's been a while, and Kor is new here, so let's go over them."
He straightened to his most authoritative height and put on his most serious face.
"Stay by me," he began, "No screaming, no running, no bumping around, no asking for anything, and DO NOT set one foot on the steps to the lower dock."
"Kor," Grelod's voice suddenly entered the foyer just as she did. Kor startled slightly from his name being said.
"You be damn sure," she said, "you listen to that last one. You all are absolutely forbidden, understand? Or those two little pops I gave you last night will seem like a puff of air to the whipping you'll get."
Kor sunk a bit, again not accustomed at all to such strict stipulations, but he nodded to her warning nonetheless.
Grelod then handed a coin pouch to Aphid, whispered something in his ear, grabbed a shawl from its hook, and slung it over her shoulders.
"I'm going now," she said, and she looked over the children, "You all mind Aphid. If I even see a hint on his face that you've given him trouble, I don't care if he says he handled it, I'll handle it. But, by all means, get as much of your noise out before I get back."
She, somewhat, softly back handed Aphid on his upper arm as she passed him, which must have been whatever constituted as departing affection for her, and went out the door.
As soon as she was gone, Bark questioned her strange leniency.
"Why is she being so...nice?" he asked Aphid.
Aphid shrugged.
"She has good days," he said, "You know that."
"Yeah, no," Bark replied, "but she even, like, apologized to Kor this morning! She's never told us sorry for hitting us!"
"I've gotten an apology," Aphid teased, "…maybe it's you."
"Nuh uh!" Bark barked back.
Aphid chuckled and shrugged again.
"She told me she remembered some leverage," he explained, "that she has on the Jarl. The orphanage has been owed more funding anyway, so I suppose she's going to get it today."
"Gold?" Jaren asked.
"Mmhm," Aphid nodded, "Money."
"What is with grown ups and money?!" Bark huffed, seeming very aware of the frustrations a coin can cost adults.
Aphid gave his comment a sympathetic smile.
"I know it's hard to understand the whys of it all," the older boy said, "but just understand: more gold means less stress. And less stress means better moods. So I guess that's why Grelod is in a better mood."
Bark sighed.
"Gods, I hope the Jarl gives her all the coins," he said, "I hope they bury her in them, like, crush her—"
"Wheel it back there a bit," Aphid chuckled, "We're gonna have fun today, so let's not think of bloodshed, alright?"
"…fine," Bark replied. Aphid put his attention on Kor.
"Oh, Kor," the older boy said, "About those rules earlier. You guys can run and play, but please not too rough, and don't leave my sight, alright?"
Kor nodded. He wasn't in any headspace to analyze these fluctuating temperaments and rules. He was just going to mind whatever he was told.
But Aphid's strictness earlier must have been for Grelod's benefit.
Except for the strictness about the dock steps.
"But the stairs still stand," Aphid said of them, "Don't set a foot on them."
"Yeah," Bark remarked, "Don't even pretend you're going to…or Aphid will really smack you."
Kor did seem a little taken aback by that. Aphid would?
"I didn't…smack you!" Aphid corrected with a hint of hesitancy, "I swatted your behind, and it wasn't for pretending, it was for—"
"It's the same thing, Aphid!" Bark argued.
"It is not!" Aphid defended, though he didn't sound absolutely confident in that.
"It is so!" Bark continued, "You hit me! A hits a hit! And it was a hard hit! Grelod Jr!"
Aphid made an offended stammer and scoffed.
"Oh, coming from you?" he said, "Mr. Hitting Is How I Show I Like You?? It was a swat! And it was--"
He suddenly felt the need to explain himself directly to Kor.
"It was because he SHOVED Eydis down the steps," he explained, "She only fell a few steps, but he really, really hurt her." He put his stern eyes back on Bark. "And you could have done even worse. I said I was sorry for swatting you, but you were very very lucky I didn't outright bust your tail—"
"That means give you a spanking," Bark nonchalantly translated to Kor, "Aphid's a hick. Wait until he gets really riled, you won't understand a word he says, and almost nothin' ends in 'g'."
Aphid narrowed his eyes at that, but continued speaking, being slightly mindful of his accent.
"And you're very, very, VERY lucky that Grelod bought my 'the crate carrier accidentally knocked a stack over on you guys' story. But I'M the one who got in big trouble for it all, and that poor guy did too! Now stop tryin'…ing… to scare Kor into thinking I'm as loose handed as Grelod, and go get ready to leave."
"Or what?" Bark challenged brattily, "You'll 'swat' me?"
Aphid folded his arms.
"No," he spoke now with a confidence, "I'll sit you on the boardwalk bench for our whole outing."
"Uuuurgh," Bark groaned, "You're the worst."
Aphid rolled his eyes, though he slightly smiled.
"Can't win," he said, "Just can't win with you guys—oh, hey—"
He noticed Kor's quivering chin, his face reddening, a tear escaping down his cheek.
"Hey," Aphid said softly and knelt before him, "It's alright."
Kor shook his head.
No, it wasn't. He didn't like it here. He wanted Papa.
The numb he had been feeling today finally turned into a twist of his stomach.
He just wanted Papa.
But Aphid would have to do, even after what he just heard of spankings or swatting or whatever it was, as Kor dove from his seat into the older boy's arms.
He began grieving again, for all he'd never have anymore. Even if Aphid's gentle hold was familiar, it wasn't the same. He wanted Papa.
"Yeah, see," Bark spoke above this, "That's how I cried after Aphid hit me."
"Yer not helpiiiin'," Aphid reached over and thumped Bark on the knee, "Gon' make sure y'all don't have to pee before we go or somethin'. Anythin' but sittin'er. Git. All three of ya, git."
"Hear him, Kor?" Bark snickered, "Can't understand a word!"
"Ew," Eydis had and only remarked on a certain business, "I'm not going at the same time as them!"
"That's not what—" Aphid began to say but Bark interrupted him.
"I'll just go off the boardwalk, into the canal."
"Gross!" Eydis icked.
"Where do you think the buckets get tossed?" Bark replied, and Eydis slugged him on the arm.
"Stop it! They do not!"
"Ow—hey! You stop!" Bark shot back and began to raise a fist to slug her back.
"AH-AH!" Aphid pointed sternly, and Bark thankfully halted before he hit. Aphid certainly spoke clearly now. "Enough. Both of you, stop. Eydis, I'd put you on the wall—"
"For what??"
"But will you three" Aphid ignored her likely feigned ignorance, "please just do whatever it is you need to do so we can go? Before Grelod gets back before you do it…"
"ooookaayy," Bark sighed and the three kids hopped up and away.
Kor remained in Aphid's arms. He wasn't sobbing as hard as he had been a moment ago, but the tears still flowed.
"…hey," Aphid spoke softly after silently comforting him for a moment, "Did Bark's bit of exaggeration there scare you?"
Kor took a moment to answer.
"N-no. I…," Kor replied but held tighter, "I mean, yes. I mean, I don't know. I just want my Papa."
Aphid gently patted the boy's back.
"I know," he said, "…I know."
Aphid was well aware there was not anything more he could say of it. All he could do is reassure him he understood and let him feel what he needs to feel, but a mild distraction probably wouldn't hurt to help get him on his feet and out the door for some fresh air.
Well…as fresh as this perpetually damp city's air could be.
"Do you like hard candy?" Aphid asked.
"W-what?" Kor sniffled.
"Do like hard candy?" Aphid repeated, "Like, honey coins?"
"…Honey coins?" Kor repeated back. Clearly he hadn't a clue what that was.
"Ah, you're in for a little treat," Aphid said, "There's this little old lady, really old, like way older than Grelod even, that makes these hard candies she calls honey coins. There made out of honey, of course. You suck on them, and once you get it melted to the center, there's a little dab of maple syrup waiting inside to finish it off. They're really good—well, I mean, if you like honey and maple syrup that is."
Kor was quiet and still for moment, before he gave a shaky breath in and long breath out.
"I do…," he finally replied.
"You do?" Aphid repeated, "Then I'll get a whole little pouch, just for you. But you gotta promise you'll scrub your teeth extra good after eating them. Just like I tell Bark, just 'cause those teeth are falling out anyway, doesn't mean they can't come out clean."
Kor suddenly shook and made a noise that was indistinguishable from a laugh or cry.
It startled Aphid, and he thought perhaps the boy had broke into sobs again, but when the little boy pulled back from his cling on the older one, he was actually smiling.
"My Papa says—said...something like that," Kor explained, but Aphid could see the smile begin to fade into thoughts of things gone again.
Aphid smiled back at him.
"Little brother…," he said, "In time, it won't hurt so much. To see that your Papa is still around in this world. Seeing him in the way someone talks. Seeing him in their actions, and maybe even feel him in their touch. And I'm certain you'll see all these things, proudly, within yourself, too. My parents are alive in everything I do. It's how we keep them with us and as alive as we are… They carried us, and now we carry them."
Kor's absorbent eyes soaked in Aphid's words. Aphid wasn't sure if the little boy could grasp what it all meant, and Kor's somewhat blank expression made it harder to see if he did, but then the boy's small smile returned.
He calmly returned into Aphid's hug and snuggled a cheek upon the older boy's shoulder.
He didn't like this place, but he liked being here. In the comfort of this…big brother.
In this moment, he felt Aphid would be right. He felt like his Papa could even be standing just beside them, and even though it still hurt his heart to know he couldn't reach out and touch him, he was in the closest thing to his Papa's hug since the night he lost him.
A big brother couldn't replace his father, but he greatly appreciated this gain.
"Now," Aphid said, gently standing the boy back, after allowing a moment for the hug, "Let's get ready to go. And hey, if Fjora is on duty this morning, I bet I can get her to laugh. And trust me, you're gonna laugh hearing her laugh…"