Where were we? Oh yeah.

This is the story of Zach Florrick. He was the first born of a young marriage. He was a happy kid, he was nice to his parents and little sister, he didn't ask for much, most of the time he didn't have to. Zach has good memories of his childhood like Alicia marking his height on the door frame.

"Would I be as tall as dad?" Zach asked his mom as he approached 5 '7 at 13 years old, Peter was 6'2"

"Don't worry about that honey." Alicia told him in a motherly way. "I think you're more like my dad. You have curly hair like him too."

"How tall was grandpa?"

"About your height."

"Oh." Zach grew 2 inches more. Bummer.

Zach's world changed when his father went to prison. (The first time) He and his sister had to change schools and move to a different neighborhood. It wasn't easy being the new kid but Zach was fascinated by the new kinds of people he met. Including his first romance: Becca.

"Look, it's the trust fund kid." Becca teased him as he walked by.

"Me?"

"Yeah you, trust fund baby."

He smiled nervously. "I don't have a trust fund, well, I think we have a college fund."

"Ha ha ha" Becca laughed at him, not with him. "I wonder why they didn't name you Peter Jr. You're such a poster boy for being a Jr."

"So you know my name?" Zach felt some confidence. "What's your name?"

As much trouble Becca gave him, he will always cherish her memory as his first sexual partner. Not so fond memories with his second girlfriend: Nissa. He doesn't know how it happened but their relationship quickly escalated to a sexual relationship. He was the one with experience and in control until he wasn't. He broke up with Nissa and less than week later, Nissa told him she was pregnant. Shit! He felt like he was 3 inches tall when he faced Nissa's parents, but he did it. Disaster avoided.

Zach continued his high school years between his adventures and dealing with his parents up and downs, he thought he handled everything well. He was ready to leave the nest, he chose Georgetown which made Alicia cry. Was it because that's where she met Peter or because of Will Gardner? He didn't want to know, the timeline was fuzzy to him, no need to clarify it.

Once Zach started his college life, he felt free for the first time. Nobody knew his dad or cared about his family, no one was taking photos of him having a beer and posting them on twitter, nobody was gossiping about him. He was just Zach and he was doing great. Until his mom called him to let him know she knew about Nissa's abortion, in fact, all of Chicago knew. Zach felt terrible, he tried to explain to Alicia, she wasn't having any of it, he tried to call Nissa, she never answered or called back.

"I tried to do the right thing, dad." Zach called Peter, who was the only one willing to hear him.

"I know, son."

"How mad is mom?"

"She's mad because you kept this from her. And now she looks like a bad mom."

"Looks like a bad mom? This is about the campaign?"

"No, no. This is because you didn't trust us."

Zach almost threw away the phone. Trust them? Peter and Alicia never trust him to tell him what was going on.

"Come on, dad,"

"Zach, don't worry about it. Your mom only needs time to get over it."

It sure did. After 6 six months Alicia finally talked to him again. She asked him to come home for the summer, and he agreed. Zach felt out of place back in the apartment, Alicia had changed his room into an office and all his stuff was in the guest bedroom. He took a look around: his old books, his school sweaters and a tin box with a joint and a couple of condoms. He walked to Grace's room, she was sitting on her computer.

"Hey, are you busy?"

"No. What's up?" Grace turned around to pay attention to her big brother.

"Last year of high school, are you excited?"

"Sure."

"Here. You should have these." Zach gave him the tin box, Grace looked inside the box and her eyes opened wide.

"I don't…I'm not."

Zach laughed at Grace's reaction. "It's better to have them and not need them than to need them and not have them."

Zach felt proud of himself, he had outgrown Chicago. He knew he'll find a new home, his home. The chance came when he met Hanna in school, they fell in love, got engaged and moved to France because of her job. Zach spent the first year in Paris making love to his girlfriend and learning French, he spent the second year fighting with his girlfriend and looking for a job and a new place to live. He got a job with a web developer company and an apartment with 3 other roomies.

One day when it was his turn to do the groceries, he met Natalie. She made fun of his accent.

"D'où venez-vous?"

"Je viens de Chicago."

"Je jamais entendu parler." Natalie teased him about his Americanness.

They started dating, nothing serious. They were having fun, seeing each other now and then. Covid changed that, Zach got stuck in her apartment. They never stopped living together.

"Je m'en fiche du mariage." Natalie told him many times. "Et je ne veux pas avoir d'enfants."

Zach had to admit that he felt the same way as Natalie. Zach's failed engagement and his parents' marriage, put him off the idea of getting married. And being a father scared him too much, the world was chaos: pandemics, global warming, riots on the streets. Why bring a baby into this?

Life in Paris was expensive, and continental flight tickets too, so Zach's trips back to Chicago became rare, it was more common for the other Florricks to visit him.

After finishing law school, Grace visited Zach in the summer. Zach was happy to see his little sister again, but Natalie pointed out, it was weird that Grace skipped graduation and came to Paris one week earlier. Also Zach learned Grace was a drinker now, and a mean drunk as Zach found out one night.

"Wait, wait." Zach was sitting on his couch, Natalie next to him. "Dad gave you the house? Our house?"

"Yes." Grace was sitting on the dinner table.

"Why?"

"Because I asked him." Grace was on her fourth or fifth cocktail. "He and Ramona weren't gonna live there, he was gonna sell it anyway. Why do you care? You don't live in Chicago, I do!"

"Of course dad gave you the house, you're the favorite."

"Me?!" The younger Florrick exclaimed. "Please, you are their favorite."

"You're the baby."

"You're the first born! You couldn't do anything wrong. You could get caught smoking pot, come up with the stupidest excuse and mom would still give you a kiss on the forehead."

"Mom didn't talk to me for months."

"So what? She was mad at you for a few months, mom has been mad at me my whole life."

"What are you talking about?"

"Come on." Grace smirked. "Remember your graduation?"

"Are you two really going to compete about this?" Natalie rolled her eyes.

"My high school graduation? Sure, mom got there late."

"Mom took photos with you wearing your gown, she asked me to record the ceremony, she threw you a party."

"Okay, okay." Zach wasn't sure where Grace was going with this.

"Guess what mom did when I graduated high school? Nothing!" Grace raised her voice. "I got nothing. No one gave a damn. Capstone asked me not to go to the ceremony, they didn't want bad press because of dad's arrest. I went to the dean's office and picked up my diploma by myself, no photo, no party. Just a plane ticket to get the hell out of town."

"I didn't know."

"Of course you didn't know, you ran away like the coward you are." Grace told him. "You fucking coward!"

"Alright, I think you had enough to drink, Grace." Natalie stood up and grabbed Grace's drink.

"Oooohh. Am I getting a time-out?" Grace laughed, "Whatever."

Grace stumbled back to her room, while Zach sat in silence.

"Ne l'écoute pas." His girlfriend caressed his face. Zach half smiled at her. He wasn't a coward, right?

"You're not a coward." The very next morning Grace apologized over breakfast. "I'm sorry I said those hurtful things."

"Why did you say them?" Zach crossed his arms

"Because I was angry. But not at you."

"What do you mean…

"Zach, please." Grace reached out to his brother. "I was drunk, I wasn't making any sense. Please forgive me."

"Don't worry, Grace." Zach assured her. A few days later, Grace left Paris. Once again. It was just Natalie and him in their little world, but Zach had trouble getting back to his routine.

"Est-ce que ça t'a vraiment dérangé à ce point, ce que ta sœur a dit?" Natalie asked him.

"I don't know...Maybe. I think it bothers me because I think it's true. I want to do something else with my life but I don't have the courage to do it."

"Comme quoi? dites-moi"

"When I first moved here I wanted to be a writer."

"Alors écris, mon amour."

Zach didn't quit his day job, he knew his short stories weren't going to sell but he enjoyed those Sunday afternoons writing away and posting them online or submitting them to local contests.

The last time Zach saw his dad was during spring break, Peter rented a chalet for his family and invited Zach and Natalie to stay a few nights.

"You can always come back to Chicago. I can get you a job in the company."

They were sharing a cognac together in the garden, looking at the Alps.

"Dad, I'm okay." Zach could tell Peter was slightly disappointed at his life's choices.

"I got big plans coming, son. You can be part of them." Peter raised his glass. "You'll see."

Peter was arrested and killed in the summer of that year. Zach barely made it to the funeral. Alicia told him she could pay for his plane ticket, but he didn't take the offer. He paid for his own ticket but Natalie couldn't go.

Zach couldn't believe his dad was dead, that someone killed him. Peter was unbeatable, Peter was larger than life. Zach put his hand on the large cherry wood casket, he didn't know how to say goodbye, but he had to.

The reading of Peter's will upset Zach more.

"When did dad change his will?" Zach asked Grace after leaving the lawyer's office.

"I'm sure he changed it when he recognized Angie as his daughter."

"Of course, sure." Zach scratched his head. "But I thought it was gonna be equal parts."

"Angie is 8 years old, she still has a long way to go. Are you short on money?"

"No, that's not it. I'm fine." Zach loosened his tie, it was a hot summer in Chicago. "Dad is dead and I feel like I have nothing."

"Natalie loves you and you love her." Grace told him. "That's something."

Zach returned to France, to his lover's arms where he felt safe. He decided he was gonna write about his father and their relationship. He didn't get far.

"Qu'est-ce qui ne va pas?" Natalie asked Zach when she saw him hitting his head against the keyboard.

"Je ne peux pas…I tried to write something serious, something of value and this isn't it. This is more like my family's story mixed with a Dan Brown novel."

"Ma mère et ma grand-mère aiment les livres de Dan Brown." Natalie told him. "And he made a lot of money."

Zach's salacious version of his family was bought by a publisher. He picked: Z.Z. Cavanaugh for his pen name in honor of his grandfather and because he knew he had stopped being a Florrick, this was the end of the bloodline. Until Natalie told him she was pregnant and wanted to keep it.

"You said you didn't want kids, we agreed on that."

"Quand j'avais 26 ans. J'ai 34 ans maintenant, je peux changer d'avis sur le désir d'un bébé" Natalie told him.

"Now that I'm having success with my books?"

"Pensez-vous que c'est une question d'argent?"

"Not what I meant."

"Fuck you, Zachary." Natalie said. "How's my English for you?"

Natalie kicked Zach out of their apartment. She made it clear, she was choosing the baby over him and she could be a single mom without him. Alone in his hotel room, Zach wondered how different his life would be had he stayed in the United States, had he stayed in Georgetown. Maybe his life would've been like Grace's life and she was doing great.