In Metropolis, several Vindicators hung out at Dirk's (Sun Boy) parents' house. In the living room, Dirk's parents had put posters of Sun Boy all over the place, a large trophy case, and an assortment of Vindicator artifacts and memorabilia. It was basically a museum dedicated to their son. Thom (Star Boy), Tasmia (Shadow Lass), Ayala (Light Lass), Tinya (Phantom Girl), and Reep (Chameleon Boy). All of them were eating laced brownies, drinking, dancing, listening to music, and being obnoxious to each other. A prominent poster of Jose' Conseco was in Dirk's bedroom. Other Vindicators were elsewhere in the house making a mess of the kitchen and engaging in fraternization in the bedrooms.

"Not that one," Dirk's mother said to Thom as he went for a brownie.

"Cuz I'm Black?" Thom assumed.

"You're allergic to sugar, remember? Try that one," Dirk's mother said, pointing out a sugar-free brownie.

"You're allergic to sugar? How do you live?" Dirk asked amazed.

"What you kids do for the galaxy is just great," Dirk's mother gushed.

"You're not concerned we're getting high, drinking, and listening to rebellious music?" Tasmia wondered.

"Fuck no," Dirk's father smiled. "We're with you, guys. Polite society is overrated. Dirk's mother and I always preferred personal interaction over this self-absorbed society we're in but then we've always been rebels."

"Tell them how we met, dear," Dirk's mother requested.

"In person," Dirk's father replied.

"Holy shit," Thom said stunned and nearly choked on his sugar-free marijuana-laced brownie.

Tasmia turned to Dirk. "The fuck is wrong with you? You look miserable."

"I'm just dreading the moment my parents get out the baby videos...again," Dirk said embarrassedly.

"Well, how do you think they'll react when they hear you're going to get fired," Tasmia teased.

"What? No way! Who said that?" Dirk freaked out.

The wall of the house suddenly exploded with all the Vindicators being dragged out into an open field. Rokk (Cosmic Boy) summoned them all to him using the metal on their belts. "Getting really tired of all of your shit," he said annoyed.

"Let's take him!" Dirk said, having nothing to lose. He fired a stream of fire at Rokk which he easily dodged. Rokk could use the magnetic pull of the planet to glide faster than most could react. Tasmia took out her sword and then cast rings around Rokk. The rings then spun creating a black tent around them.

Rokk crushed and twisted the rings deactivating them. "Scatter," he said as his sword scattered into thousands of metal shards. The metal shards tore through the black tent shredding it. Gim (Colossal Boy) became a giant and charged Rokk. "Senbonzakura Kageyoshi," Rokk said as he summoned ten very large blades from the ground. These blades were three times as tall as a man and incredibly sharp. They were formed and molded by the metal underneath the ground, a favorite technique of Rokk. The large blades then scattered into millions of tiny shards. The shards surrounded Gim's entire frame and then sliced into him from every possible angle. Gim fell to the ground a bloody mess.

Reep then turned into an alien-dragon creature and screeched at Rokk. The million metal shards sliced into Reep's wings dropping him. Ayala fired lightning from a lightning bow she had manifested. The lightning bolt was blocked by a wave of metal shards that automatically shielded Rokk from damage. Ayala attempted several rapid shots at him. Rokk created a magnetic energy field around him, absorbed the electricity, and then shocked several Vindicators at once. Jan turned the metal shards around him to plastic making them inert. Rokk summoned more metal shards and fired them all at once at him. Jan turned them into plastic as well, but their initial momentum still remained.

"Oh, shit!" he realized as he was slammed into the house by the plastic shards.

"I got this," Val (Karate Kid) declared and then showed Rokk some sick moves. Rokk took control of the metal weights around Val's ankles and threw him into a nearby lake. Lourno (Triplicate Girl) attempted to get the metal off her clothes. As soon as she did, she divided herself into three. A few metal shards, however, had managed to get into her clothing. Rokk slammed the three Lourno copies into each other causing two of the three to disappear into smoke with the original knocked out.

Thom fired on Rokk multiple times. Each time, he hit a few shards that immediately dropped to the ground. Without realizing it, metal shards got into his gloves. Thom fired again but this time the metal in his gloves suddenly became heavier. Thom hit the ground with a thud as his hands were weighed down. Tinya (Phantom Girl) attempted to escape only to find she couldn't phase as Rokk controlled the magnetic field around her.

Rok created a dome magnetic field around all of the Vindicators and created dozens of sword blades floating around him ready to stab them all from every direction should they try to make a move. "This lack of professionalism and debauchery among you all must end," Rokk ordered them.

Ultra Boy then teleported to the scene. "Dragonshit!" he called out and then noticed his team was fucked up. "Hey, man, only I can kick ass on my own team," he said offended.

"I still outrank you, Jo," Rokk reminded him.

"Then kick my ass. Then, I'll kick their ass," Jo replied.

"Very well," Rokk allowed. "Take charge," he ordered.

Jo gave Rokk a mocking salute and waited for him to fly off. Jo then quickly healed all of the Vindicators smarting from the ass-kicking they had just received. "Vindicators, recover. We're going to the club."

Mars

Alex and Kelly drove down the streets of Midvale and came to their house. As they drove, the townspeople gave them a friendly wave. Alex and Kelly exited their car wearing wedding dresses. Their car had "Just Married" painted on the rear window. Upon entering the house, Alex and Kelly danced a bit and then had a romantic kiss.

"What a fine pair we are," Kelly noted.

"What do you say to blueberry pancakes, crispy hashbrowns, bacon, eggs, freshly squeezed orange juice, and black coffee?" Alex asked as she took the wedding dress off revealing normal civilian clothes underneath.

"Sounds great," Kelly smiled as she took her dress off revealing a business suit underneath.

"To our wedding day," Alex toasted as they clinked glasses of orange juice.

"A special day," Kelly agreed.

"A day of great significance," Alex added.

"To us both," Alex said.

"Naturally," Alex replied.

The two then kissed romantically. "Well done, us," Kelly said pleased. "Well, I'm off to work. Plenty of clients in Metropolis."

"Have a good day, dear," Alex said as she left.

As soon as Kelly left, Alex heard a knock on the door. Eliza entered the house. "Forgive me for not stopping by sooner. I didn't know you were in town, yet."

"We just arrived and settled in," Alex said forgivingly.

"Can I persuade you and Kelly to join my bridge club?" Eliza asked hopefully.

"Well, we still have some unpacking to do," Alex evaded.

"So, you living in this big house all by yourself?" Eliza asked, looking around.

"You know I'm married now, right?" Alex rolled her eyes.

"I don't see a ring," Eliza noted.

"Well, I assure you, I'm married...to a woman," Alex told her.

"How many years have you been together?" Eliza wondered.

"Well, it just seems like we've always been together," Alex said thoughtfully.

"I wish Jeremiah would remember our anniversaries," Eliza shook her head dismayed. "So, what do you have planned?"

"What do you mean?" Alex asked confused.

"For your wedding night," Eliza said obviously.

"We're going to use a prosthetic penis to get me pregnant," Alex said bluntly.

"Well, in that case, you won't need to do much then, but it's still fun to set the scene," Eliza said knowingly. "I was reading about this article in Catco magazine about Lesbian bed death. Let me go get it."

"That's quite alright," Alex resisted.

"I'll be right back. You'll thank me for this," Eliza said and then quickly left the house to go get it.

Earth-Metropolis

In the club, Val (Karate Kid) contemplated Tinya (Phantom Girl) as she danced to her heart's content. One time, Thom, Jon, Val, and Tinya confronted a large green-colored three-eyed alien causing a ruckus downtown. Jan got bitch-slapped to the ground as the alien didn't find his helium trick very amusing. The alien then threw a large piece of broken equipment down the street. Tinya phased at the right moment allowing it to go through her as she ran toward the scene. Val worked some fancy Karate moves to keep the alien off-guard. As the alien tried to punch Val in the face, Tinya grabbed Val out of the way. She then phased her hand into the alien's chest and pulled out his heart.

"Don't pick on my friends," Tinya lectured as the alien fell to the ground dead.

At the same time, an image of Tinya doing the same exact movement was seen on her home planet of Bgztl. "Oh my God!" the locals shouted as they saw a faint image of Tinya holding the bloody alien heart in her hand.

Back on Earth, Tinya was completely impressed with herself. "And he's down! Boom! That felt great! Did you see me take his heart out?" she said ecstatically. "Oh, wait, did I ruin your moment, Val?" she asked concernedly.

"Not at all. A wise man knows to be humble before your god-like powers," Val said amazed and horrified at the same time. "Besides, you looked hot."

Tinya got close to Val with a flirtatious gaze. "Val, you're the best Vindicator fighter. Nobody can finger you," she complimented.

"Oh, well, thanks," Val said not bothering to correct her word usage.

The people of Bgztl were routinely scandalized as Tinya killed fools with extreme violence whether it be by pistol in her own martial arts. Whenever she would take a shower or get romantic with someone on Earth, her image could also be seen on Bgztl doing the same exact movements. Police attempted to arrest her for public indecency a number of times but couldn't actually grab a hold of her. When Tinya would occasionally visit her home planet, her image would appear on Earth doing the same exact thing. For instance, her image could be seen making out with her Bgztl boyfriend floating in midair in the Vindicator common room. Whenever this happened, the boys all took a seat on the couch to watch.

"Nice," Jo, Dirk, Thom, and Gim all said at once as Tinya's clothes came off.

It got so bad it created a global incident. Brainiac 5 hauled Tinya into his office to chew her out. "Your mating practices with Ultra Boy were seen in the city square on Bgztl. You have several warrants for your arrest for public indecency."

"As a Vindicator, I thought I was immune from prosecution," Tinya said unconcernedly.

"Your skills are invaluable, but your leadership potential is thwarted by these incidents. The girls believe you to be an exhibitionist slut and the boys see you as their personal porn star. You could potentially break into the top ten Vindicators if you were to be more discreet," Brainiac 5 said.

"The S-Class is on an entirely different level than me and the A-Class are a bunch of immature idiots," Tinya said confidently.

"I encourage you to be magnanimous with Ultra Boy. At least then, it can be justified as marriage preparation," Brainiac 5 said.

"Sure, as soon as he starts being the same," Tinya said resentfully. "If you're done chewing me out, I have a club to get to."

Brainiac 5 dismissed her from his office and then accessed all the cameras inside the club to keep an eye on his Vindicators.

Mars

Kelly went to work dealing with several clients and then was visited by Jeremiah. "Kelly, are you looking forward to this evening?" he asked her.

"Dinner with the Danvers, of course!" Kelly suddenly realized.

"Family dinners with the in-laws are a rite of passage for newlywed couples. Kara and Mon failed completely with their constant bickering, profanity, and discussing politics at the dinner table," Jeremiah said.

"Sounds like them," Kelly said not surprised.

"I owe my success to being a keen judge of character," Jeremiah said.

"Like Lillian Luthor and Hank Henshaw?" Kelly wondered.

"Precisely," Jeremiah agreed. "No skeletons in your closet, are there?"

"All of my skeletons are completely out of the closet loud and proud," Kelly assured him.

"Glad to hear it. Your future in this family depends on it," Jeremiah warned.

At the house, Eliza was still with Alex. "You don't have a song, something you played at your wedding?" Eliza asked surprised.

"No, nothing special," Alex shook her head.

"I have you covered with my 1950s records," Eliza said helpfully. "What about seduction techniques?" she asked as she read a Catco magazine.

"Oh, I have those," Alex said, actually uncertain of herself.

"Of course, you do," Eliza said condescendingly.

"Just out of curiosity, what does it say?" Alex asked curiously.

"Give her eye contact. You're always looking around the room for weapons, and escape routes; try to relax," Eliza advised. "Get yourself a sense of humor. You're so serious all the time. Have a positive attitude; you're always doom and gloom. Be honest and open; you're always keeping secrets from everyone. Learn to relax; you're always looking like you're about to get into a fight or draw your pistol. And smile more often."

"What else does it say?" Alex asked, not completely buying into this.

"It says the death rate of single lesbians is twice that of married ones," Eliza said.

"Wow...that is so fucked up," Alex said dismayed. She then got a call from Kelly on her cell phone. "Yes, honey?"

"Listen, about tonight, I must confess I'm a bit nervous. More so than my last patient complaining about being under someone else's control and hearing voices," Kelly admitted.

"I have it all under control," Alex lied.

"It's just I get a little tongue-tied when it comes to your parents. If tonight doesn't go perfectly, it could be the end," Kelly said dramatically.

"It's just one night," Alex rolled her eyes.

"I just want to impress your parents," Kelly said concernedly.

"All you need to do is impress the wife," Alex corrected her.

"Wonderful, we're on the same page," Kelly said pleased.

"Until then," Alex said and then hung up.

Earth-Metropolis

At the club, Jo and Dirk suddenly teleported in green and red light and stated their catchphrases as they did: "Dragonshit!" "Jose' Conseco!" The whole club stared at them except for Tinya, Val, and Tasmia who were used to their antics.

"Why do they call it a club? I thought a club was an ancient wooden instrument you use to kill baby seals," Jo said confused.

"In ancient times, cavemen would leave their clubs outside as they went to gatherings," Dirk said incorrectly.

"That sounds like bullshit. Only a Durlan would believe that," Jo doubted.

"That's racist," Tinya scolded and then hung out with Val at a table.

"This is great, just hanging out. Why would people be so eager for solitude when they can...," Val said conversationally.

"I'm not into you," Tinya told him.

"Excuse you?" Val asked shocked.

"What were you saying?" Tinya asked with a confused look.

Val went into a long explanation about chakra pathways and gates. "That's not right," Tinya said.

"Well, we can agree to disagree and that's fine. Sorry if I was a bit too forceful," Val apologized.

"Don't apologize. I like it when you open up," Tinya replied.

"Really?" Val asked surprised.

"You're one of my best friends," Tinya said.

"How long have I been in the friend zone?" Val wondered.

"You have been since we were kids," Tinya continued.

"Wait...what?" Val asked confused.

"Don't storm up and close up. I want us to always be honest with each other," Tinya said.

"I am completely calm and relaxed," Val said defensively.

"You want a girl whose world revolves around you, and I can't be that, right now. My world isn't closed off anymore. I have other people that need me," Tinya said.

"The fuck?" Val wondered.

Tinya then phased back to Earth. "Sorry about that. I was just dumping my fuck-boy."

"I completely understand," Val realized.

"Can we start over?" Tinya asked.

"Of course," Val smiled.

Mars

Jeremiah and Eliza came by for dinner later that evening. Alex and Kelly greeted them warmly as they came in. "You two being gay is so exotic," Eliza said fascinated.

"At least neither of you is communist," Jeremiah narrowed his eyes at them.

"Oh, hush, Jeremiah," Eliza rolled her eyes.

"I'll get dinner ready," Kelly said helpfully.

Alex sat down with her parents while Kelly was in the kitchen. "If we make the bullet wider rather than longer, we can kill twice as many people, and lose half as many men in the field," Jeremiah said conversationally.

"You're truly a pioneer in ballistics," Alex humored him.

"Does Kelly need help in the kitchen?" Eliza asked concernedly.

"I'm sure she's fine in there," Alex said unconcernedly.

"Let's sing some songs from your childhood," Eliza suggested.

"Seriously?" Alex asked horrified.

Kara, Mon, Brainiac 5, and Shrinking Violet (Salu) instantly teleported to Mars near the barrier with several equipment trucks. The trucks reassembled on the spot to form large radio towers. The Martians already had red-colored dome structures set up. The barrier encompassed the size of a small town with several thousand Martians trapped inside.

Brainiac 5 immediately sent drones into the barrier only for them to disappear and not come back. "I'm not getting any readings and communications are jammed," he reported.

"I'm going to need a cup of coffee," Kara said anxiously. She assumed Alex was somewhere inside that barrier.

"What's your assessment?" Mon asked Brainiac 5.

"Significant cosmic microwave background radiation," Brainiac 5 reported as he scanned the barrier. "Radiation levels are within safe parameters for organic beings...for now."

"I feel the barrier doesn't want me to enter. I feel like defying it," Mon considered.

"Hold that thought," Brainiac 5 requested. "I'm detecting a longer wavelength superimposed over the noise here."

"Meaning?" Mon asked impatiently.

Brainiac 5 turned on a computer tower with a small screen showing Alex inside the barrier. "Did you just...pull that machine out of your ass?" Mon wondered amazed.

"Holy shit," Kara said stunned as she came back with her cup of coffee. "Salu, shrink to the subatomic level and attempt to get underneath the barrier," Kara ordered her. Salu nodded and then shrank down to the point of being unseeable. She presumably made her way through the Martian tunnel system underneath the barrier.

"I'm not confident about this mission. There's no reason to think the perimeter doesn't extend subterraneously," Brainiac 5 told her.

"There's no reason to suspect that it does," Kara said argumentatively.

"We don't know enough about the threat to send in a high-level Vindicator," Brainiac 5 pointed out.

"My sister is in there. Everything and everyone are expendable including me," Kara said deadly serious. "What do we got?"

"Radar, lidar, sodar, infrared," Brainiac 5 listed off.

"Cycle through," Kara ordered.

The television monitor then showed Alex and Kelly in a suburban house inside the barrier goofing around like they were in a sitcom. "What...the...fuck?" Kara wondered.

"It does appear to be her," Brainiac 5 considered.

Kara then saw Jeremiah and Eliza on the screen. Upon seeing them, Kara had to take a moment to herself. "I'm fairly certain those two are dead," Mon said insensitively. Kara closed her eyes in grief, focused, and then came back into the conversation.

"Is this happening in real-time? Is it recorded, fabricated?" Kara questioned.

"I don't know," Brainiac 5 said honestly.

"Well, what the fuck do you know?" Kara snaped.

"My equipment registered high levels of cosmic microwave background radiation and intertwined was this broadcast signal," Brainiac 5 explained.

"Are we recording this?" Kara asked.

"Never stopped," Brainiac 5 replied.

Inside the barrier, Kelly was nearly done with dinner as Alex stalled Jeremiah and Eliza. "Dinner is served," Kelly announced.

"Breakfast for dinner?" Jeremiah questioned.

"Holy shit," Alex said softly, totally dismayed.

"How very...African," Eliza excused.

"Let's have a toast," Alex suggested. "To my lovely and talented wife."

"To my esteemed in-laws," Kelly toasted.

The four of them clinked wine glasses and sat down. "So, why don't you two have children yet?" Eliza scolded.

Alex nearly spat out her drink. "Well, we have been having sex...," she trailed off.

"When, where?" Jeremiah questioned.

"Patience, Jeremiah, they're setting up their story," Eliza allowed. "Let them tell it."

"Yes, our...," Alex struggled.

"Yes, exactly what is your sex life?" Jeremiah pressed.

"Oh, just leave the poor girls alone," Eliza scolded.

"No, really, I mean, I think it's a perfectly simple question, honestly." Jeremiah objected. "Why are you two having sex? Why? Damn it, why? Why are you...?" he shouted and then started choking on his food.

"Stop it," Eliza rolled her eyes at Jeremiah as he continued to choke.

"You should probably do something," Kelly said to Alex.

"Why? He's being an asshole as he usually is," Alex said scornfully.

Jeremiah continued to choke and fell out of his chair. "Alex, seriously," Kelly said concernedly.

Alex sighed and went over to him. She pulled him back up and then squeezed his midsection so he would cough the chunk up. Jeremiah quickly recovered and looked around dazed. "Oh, just look at the time," he said, wanting to leave.

"Yes, we'd better get going," Eliza agreed.

"Are you both alright?" Kelly asked them.

"We had such a lovely time," Eliza lied.

"Thanks for coming," Kelly said sweetly as they left.

As they left, Alex stopped her blank stare. "You know, we're quite the queer couple," she said of herself and Kelly.

"I don't think that was ever in question," Kelly smiled.

"We're not wearing rings," Alex noted.

"Well, can you remedy that?" Kelly asked as they sat together on the couch.

Alex concentrated and then created rings around their fingers. "I do," they both said together.

"Let's live happily ever after," Kelly said as she kissed Alex.

Outside the barrier, Kara and Mon eyed the TV monitor showing Alex and Kelly on the couch in real-time. "That was some really cheesy bullshit," Mon said unimpressed.

"Yes, yes it was," Kara said fascinated.