A/N: Thank you all for reading. I will be doing some gradual editing so if you see old chapters update that is why. I don't think any edits will be large enough for you to need to reread those chapters. My updates will be less frequent, not daily, but hopefully larger chapters. Tell me what you think about the characterization! Your reviews are very motivating.
By the time Hermione had been released from the hospital wing she knew that there was more to the last 6 months than anyone was telling her. She could feel the life debt she owed to Narcissa Malfoy. There was a suspicious magical warmth in the back of her consciousness that she couldn't quite locate. Her mind library had been nearly untouched except for a stack of books on a table next to the armchair. No matter what she did her hands passed through the pile as if she were a ghost. She knew those must be her memories. Now she just needed to figure out why she couldn't open them.
There was a third magical link she could feel that was faint, felt velvety and fresh like Harry's magic, wrapped like a ribbon on her left pinky finger. She had considered asking him about it but something in her mind told her to keep it to herself. Was it another life debt? It wouldn't be so farfetched to think she owed one to Harry but in that case she would have felt this one long before. The fact that she could feel Mrs. Malfoys apparently had a lot to do with the amount of magic she had exerted to save her. The complexity of magical bonding was far beyond her comprehension at the moment.
Then there was the new found affection Harry was showing her. It was not unwelcome and no one seemed to be surprised about the fact. Ron, who she expected to feel a bit put out, hadn't said a single thing against it. Although the ginger was also a bit more affectionate than usual and had reminded her that she nearly died so he needed to 'get his hugs in now'. (That had earned him smack to the shoulder and a laugh.) Harry was by her side nearly the whole day and a half in the infirmary while she let Madam Pomfrey fret over her.
As the week wore on, however, things began to grate on her. From the sudden change in conversation topics, to the way Harry was always hovering at her side, she could feel the tension of holding back secrets. There was a distinct notion that although Harry had affection for her he did not make any overtures about wanting to date, though everyone assumed that they had some kind of arrangement. She had also noticed some pitying looks sent Harry's way from a very unlikely pair, Ron and Draco.
Even stranger was the Potions Master. From what she had been told she had taken it upon herself to risk her life to remove his mark. Something that truly had never crossed her mind and had apparently brought her under the ire of the Headmaster. The man in question treated her only slightly differently. Professor Snape did not berate her or Harry in class to her utter surprise. She had attempted to make eye contact with him across the Great Hall or during Potions but he acted like she didn't exist. Hermione would have given up on him but for the sensation of desperately wanting his attention. It was unnerving.
By the following Friday, Harry had asked her to meet him in the Room of Requirement after their classes. The serious look on his face had worried her but Hermione had agreed and given her best friend a hug while he kissed her forehead before he left the Great Hall for his afternoon classes.
The rest of the day continued without incident until she was making her way up to the 7th floor to meet Harry, running late after stopping to talk to Professor Flitwick about a report. In her haste, she turned a corner at a near run and slammed straight into the solid form of Professor Snape. They fell unceremoniously into a heap on the floor. The groan he let out sent a shiver down her spine.
"Oh! Professor, I'm so sorry!" Hermione hurried to say as she pushed herself up, only to realize that she was sprawled across the man and a liquid heat had washed over her. Their eyes locked and for a moment she thought she saw something in his eyes that was far more than the stoicism he always had when she was present. Up close she could really see how much younger he looked. It had escaped her notice at first but the girls in the common room had been commiserating over the Professor's appearance the last couple days.
His hair looked healthy and thick, her fingers itched to run through it. He looked his age, she would guess, which was a huge improvement considering how much older he looked before. It had always surprised her that Professor Snape had been classmates with the likes of the Marauders. His skin was healthy and didn't have the slightly malnourished pallor that it once had; probably due to a vitamin D deficiency with how much time he spent in the dungeons. There was something very austere about him, he looked sturdier and stronger. His eyes were rimmed with long pitch dark lashes that Hermione instantly coveted. She stared into his black gaze that flashed with something like desire. The warmth in the back of her mind flared and met the liquid heat head on making her gasp from the intensity. He was frozen beneath her, barely breathing as she traced a finger down the center of his brow and to the tip of his nose. Hermione dared to touch her finger tip to his shallow cupid's bow when she was thrown off of the Professor with such force she hit the wall next to them.
"20 points from Gryffindor for running in the halls and a detention tomorrow with Filch for unseemly behavior towards a teacher!" He growled at her as he rather gracelessly got to his feet.
Hermione rubbed the back of her head and fought the sudden onslaught of tears from the pain and the verbal abuse. She glared up at the Professor whose face softened in worry.
"Miss Granger, are you injured?" He offered her a hand but she ignored it, using the wall as leverage to pick herself back up.
"I'm fine." She snapped at him, frustrated by the dizziness that took her vision once she was upright again. "I guess I should see Filch tomorrow before classes to talk about my detention."
Hermione didn't look at him, not wanting to shed any tears in front of the former spy. Remembering what had supposedly happened between them, she finally looked up. He was closer now, scrutinizing her with his dark eyes. With no room to step back, her body went still as he grabbed her chin, examining her. "I suggest you head to the hospital wing. I apologize for the force of my removal of you, Granger."
His apology took her by surprise while the heat of that magical connection flared again at his touch. Could she owe him a life debt? Could both people feel it if they made one? It was so intense in a way that her life debt to Mrs. Malfoy had never felt, even in her presence. She felt the anxiety attack coming on and slipped from his grasp, "I-I'll go see, Madam Pomfrey."
Then she was off. She didn't see the stricken face of the Professor, who stood flexing the fingers that had dared to touch her. Hermione also didn't notice that Professor Dumbledore had witnessed the exchange from a sheltered alcove down a side hallway. Instead Hermione took a lap from where she knew the Room of Requirement was and the Hospital Wing. Once she was reasonably sure that Snape had returned to the dungeons, she went to the Room of Requirement, entering into a room similar to the common room.
"Hermione," Harry greeted her warmly, getting up from the cozy couch to wrap her arms around her. The feeling on her pinky emitted a smooth, coolness that soothed her immediately.
Suddenly feeling overwhelmed by everything, she wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his chest. The tears came unbidden and rather than asking what was wrong, Harry pulled her towards the couch and into his lap, shushing her gently. It didn't take long for her to grow tired and frustrated with herself.
"Hermione, did something happen?" Harry tipped her chin up to meet his gaze, so reminiscent of the professor that it sent a shiver through her body. He pulled her closer, thinking she must be cold.
"I just feel so lost, Harry. Most people are treating me the same but the people that matter, you, Ron, Professor McGonagall; you all look at me like I might break. Then there's Professor Snape!" Hermione summoned a table with a full set of tea for them. She busied herself with making their cups.
The hand Harry had been running up and down her back stilled, "What about Professor Snape?"
"He is avoiding me! I've tried to talk to him and ask him about the ritual, maybe learn more about the Dark Mark but I swear he sees me in the hallways and turns the other direction!" Hermione ranted. "Then I bumped into him before I came here and he takes house points and gives me a detention! You would think he would be more grateful!"
Harry sat up straighter and grabbed her by the arms, making her look at him. "Hermione, did anything else happen?"
She was surprised by the tinge of panic in his eyes. Without thinking she lifted her hand and cupped his cheek with the hand that held the invisible bond. It seemed to sing in her bones at the contact. His eyes softened immediately as he leant into her touch. "Harry, nothing happened. I actually had to apologize because I knocked him over. It was quite awkward. He pushed me off so hard that I slammed into the wall but I'm okay. It was more shocking than anything else and he did apologize for that."
"Are you sure you're okay?" Harry's brow furrowed with concern.
"Yes. Frustrated but otherwise I'm fine. What did you want to talk about Harry?" Hermione allowed herself to relax in his embrace.
Harry's expression turned serious. He shifted so that Hermione slipped from his lap and sat next to him. The warmth of his hand as she laced their fingers together was familiar. That feeling of magic around her pinky was bright. She examined her pinky with interest. It's definitely a bond with Harry. But what was it for? The information was just out of her reach.
"Hermione, it's about your parents…"Harry started, grabbing her attention. She searched his eyes and saw only sorrow in them.
Hermione felt tears begin to well up in her eyes, unbidden. There was a thick pain in her chest at the mention of her parents, "What happened? I sent them away. They are safe, aren't they?"
Harry kissed her knuckles and then met her eyes, a few tears already slipping from the corner of his eyes. "They are gone, Hermione. You sent them away but they…you said they passed a few weeks before term."
The air left Hermione's lungs. She remembered distinctly altering their memories and sending them to Australia after finalizing a deal with their ministry. The tears cascaded down her cheeks and a sob choked her words, "But I-I sent them a-away Harry! They were supposed to be safe far FAR AWAY!"
She jumped up and wrapped her arms around herself, feeling like her chest was being torn in half. "Did HE send Death Eaters to them? Why didn't the Order know? Couldn't Professor Snape have warned us if they were going to be attacked?"
Her entreaties only made Harry look more sorrowful and apologetic. "I don't have answers to that, Hermione. I had barely found out that they were gone before Snape was attacked. You kept it a secret. I have no idea how they died."
"No no no no no NO! Don't lie to me! Why wouldn't I tell you? It must have been his followers, who else could it have been!" She grabbed him by his shirt, forcing herself to speak through the sobs. "How could they not have known?! W-why did the Order let them die? Why did you let them die!"
She pounded her fists into his chest but he held fast until she was sobbing mournfully against him, sinking to her knees. Harry was also crying, as he held her. "I'm so sorry, love. I'm so sorry."
"I couldn't even save them. I should have been able to save them. What good is magic if it can't keep the people I love alive!" Her voice sounded broken, stuffy and moving towards fury. Hermione was swiftly rushing from denial to anger. The magic in question started manifesting around them. Furniture and books were soon strewn around the room. "It should have been ME!"
She barely registered her magic flying out of her. Harry stumbled backward but still caught her when she crumbled to the floor, weeping loudly. Steadfast, Harry pulled her into his lap and held her through her grief.
Severus stood against the railing of the Astronomy Tower, his fingers flexing against the cold metal, the only barrier between him and a long fall. He knew that Potter was informing Hermione of her parents. It was the only explanation for the intense waves of grief that had started an hour earlier. The bond had flared up and urged him to go to her but he had ignored it, bitterly. She would not want comfort from him.
Keeping himself away from her had been for her peace and his own. She knew she had wanted to ask about the ritual but he wasn't yet ready to be alone with her after her memory loss. He'd been occluding to the point of dysfunction. But had tamped it down to only when she was nearby, whether in class or the Great Hall. Potions class with her was torture all its own. He had caught himself looking at her while she worked, admiring the curve of her neck, the exact movement of her hands, even the sound of her voice. All while seeing Potter pander to her every whim.
At the thought of the cursed boy he scoffed. Of course the boy had a bond with Hermione too, it couldn't just be Fate's gift to him to attach him to the young woman. Instead it was yet another trial he would have to weather on his own. When Narcissa had informed him of the bond he had nearly punched a wall. His control of his emotions flagged at the revelation.
It was late in the afternoon, a day or so after his kidnapping. Poppy had sent him an owl to remind him to change the last bandages on the lashes on his back or she would be forced to come to his quarters to do it herself. Severus had insisted he would be able to do it. In reality he had to summon Narcissa with a house elf to assist him.
"Severus, you stubborn cow," She had tsked and sat him down quickly. "I know it must be difficult for your Bonded to not remember you but you cannot neglect yourself. You should have stayed in the infirmary at least another day."
Narcissa nagged him over his shoulder in the way only a good friend could without being rebuked.
"What do you make of the bond Narcissa? I know you can see it. I'd considered bringing you here to look at it but I daresay we have been quite busy." He sneered, only to wince when she tore the bandages off more rough than necessary. The Potions Master felt her finish adding a bit of dittany to the last wounds that were finally free of infection. The softness of her hands as he bandaged her was soothing enough to make the tenseness leave his shoulders.
Once she was done she took a seat in front of him while he pulled his shirt back on. "It's a deep bond, very strong. Without knowing the components of the ritual there's no way to figure out the specifics. Draco gave you the book with the original ritual but I'm sure you noticed that the girl had really only kept the structure of the ritual. Her changes were significant."
"I had come to that conclusion as well. If she regains her memory we would have more information. If she doesn't then I will have to work even harder to find a way to break the bond." Severus dropped his head into his hands, trying not to think of Potter and how he had so comfortably held the young woman in his arms.
"Severus, you're not the only one who has a bond with her," Narcissa eyed him as he jerked his head up.
"She has another bond?"
"Yes. Other than yours and the life debt she owes me, there is a smaller, weaker bond. I don't know what it is but it seems to be fairly recent as well. Not more than a year old. It's not a soul bond, but there is a tinge of darkness to it." The Malfoy mistress frowned as she tried to recall the bond. "It seems familiar. Like something mentioned in a book I read or said in passing without fanfare."
"Who is the bond with?" Severus already knew the answer. The girl was predictably self-sacrificing.
"Harry Potter," She confirmed his prediction.
"Of course! Of course I become magically bonded to a woman only for her to run into Potter's arms!" He stood up and practically stomped his way around the room, trying not to give in to the urge to break something. Severus knew it was childish but the angst ridden teen in him had reappeared at the familiar pain of losing to a Potter.
Narcissa smacked his shoulder, "None of that. Your compulsion toward Miss Granger is deeper and stronger, practically sentient. I'm almost certain Potter has no idea he is bonded with her. It seems your little Gryffindor Princess has been playing with bonds long before the one she used on you."
He crossed the room and poured firewhiskey into two glasses, then handed the other to Narcissa. Severus sipped at his drink, not wanting to sit but finding it difficult to not start pacing. He felt her eyes on him, inquisitively taking him in, "You shouldn't concentrate on breaking the bond, Severus. It may come in handy later. Look how it helped you just yesterday"
The dark man glared at her and scoffed. "I will not risk her life again. Yesterday was unfortunate and entirely my own fault."
"I didn't want to have to say this, but Severus the bond may be unbreakable." Narcissa said forcefully.
"Don't tell me that." He gritted out.
"I have seen bonds all my life, Severus. I know the depth and strength of them. I have never seen one so embedded, entwined, and powerful as the one I see wrapped around you." Narcissa sighed heavily. "You cannot break the bond unless she also wants to break it. Draco said the effects of the bond are uneven. The hold it has on you is stronger to prevent you from breaking it. The only way to free the both of you is for her to be the one to break the bond and to do that she has to: 1. Remember the original ritual, 2. Want to break it for her own gain, and 3. Make sure breaking the bond will not damage your magical cores. And that's all if the ritual itself wasn't so convoluted that she can figure out how to reverse it."
Severus felt another harsh wave of grief that pulled him out of his reverie. As far as he was concerned, nothing was impossible when it came to experimental magic. He would not entertain the thought of forcing the girl to stay bonded to him. Another pulse of sadness and rage rolled over him. He couldn't help himself and sent soothing magic through the bond, hoping it would help her calm down. The brave girl had truly been through too much.
He hated how helpless he felt. Worse was the disgust he carried with him as he continued to desire Hermione. The memories of their passionate kisses and her saying she wanted him had plagued his mind. He knew it was all because of the bond, regardless of any foolish thoughts he had about her before it. The bond was thrumming inside him, frustrated at the distance he had kept from the object of his affections.
The man recalled the collision with the young woman earlier that night. The weight of her on top of him as they fell to the floor sent heat straight to his core. He could still smell her vanilla tinged scent on his robes. When she had touched his face and then dared to touch his lip he was focused on how beautiful she looked without the haunting shadow behind her eyes. He couldn't get away fast enough.
The sound of her smacking into the wall because of him had registered too late. He had already taken points from her and given her a detention. She had refused his help with obvious anger but his worry had taken hold of him and he had touched her again, imploring her to see Poppy. The guilt weighed heavy on him. He had hurt her so much already. Yet there was so much still for her to find out.
Not for the first time he cursed the Headmaster. When Severus finally tells her about the old man's manipulation the shadow would be back in her eyes in full force. It would only get darker as the days progressed.
Harry tucked Hermione into her bed in her room. She had cried herself into exhaustion. He berated himself for telling her about her parents without finding out more about their deaths. Not being able to answer her questions made everything so much worse.
He brushed her hair away from her face and sat with her, contemplating how she would react when she learned more. The death of her parents had been a factor in her journey to the Astronomy Tower. The realization made his stomach turn. This time they would all be there to make sure she didn't take it that far.
Hermione stirred and gripped his hand, blinking sleepily as she moved further into the bed, "Stay, I don't want to be alone."
Harry acquiesced, kicking off his shoes and placing his glasses on her bedside table. Then he turned down the covers so he could join her. He wrapped an arm around her as she curled into his side and placed her head on his shoulder, breathing in against his neck. Laying next to Hermione only solidified his feelings for her. With a kiss to her forehead he settled into sleep, knowing in his soul that he was right where he needed to be, bonds be damned.
Draco cast a stasis charm on his potion and took a look around the room. At the table in front of him Hermione and Potter had also cast their charms and had started to write down the homework assignment. He watched as Potter stood close enough to Hermione to bump his arm against hers repeatedly. The Slytherin had observed the two Gryffindors obviously flirting during the entire class.
He dared to glance at his godfather a few times while he brewed and had only caught him once staring at Hermione with a disconcerted expression. Without the knowledge of the past 6 months it seemed that Hermione wasn't so averse to the attention from the Boy-Who-Lived. Looking at the Potions Master now as he surveyed the room, he could see how his knuckles grew white from the firm hold he had on his biceps when he crossed his arms. Draco would never say it to him, but he felt a touch of pity for his godfather. The bond would grow unbearable before long, especially without Hermione getting near him.
"You had all better hope your potions are stable or they won't survive until next class. If they don't you'll get a zero for the day. Dismissed!" Snape called out and then returned to his desk.
"I'll take that, Hermione." Potter smiled stupidly at Hermione who blushed. God the boy was an idiot.
With a swish of his wand Hermione's bag was in the air between them, "Chivalry doesn't suit you Pothead, especially with that hair."
"Jealous a girl actually likes me, ferret?" Potter shot back with a smirk.
Draco rolled his eyes, "You sure she likes you or just doesn't want to break her back with all the books she has in here?"
"Draco! There aren't that many books this time!" Hermione argued, laughing along. It had taken a couple days but she had warmed up to the friendship again, especially once she realized they were partners in Arithmancy.
Hermione took Harry's hand and pulled him towards the classroom door, behind Dean Thomas and Ron. Draco followed with her bag bobbing behind him. He turned one last time to look at his godfather. Their eyes met and Draco would swear on his fortune that the Potions Master was in physical pain. Stopping at the door, mindful of any other students nearby, he addressed him with his title, "Are you alright, Professor?"
"Catch up with your friends, Draco." The man stood and turned to clear the chalk boards, shoulders stiff.
"Never thought you would call a group of Gryffindors my friends, did you Professor?" He attempted to break the tension.
The Professor paused, and turned. "You'd be surprised. I had hoped you might one day find a friend in that house. Nothing better than a Gryffindor to remind you how important subtlety and self-control is."
Surprised by his answer, Draco tilted his head and asked, "Did you ever have any Gryffindors as friends, Uncle?"
There was a flash of something in his godfather's eyes that quickly disappeared. "Just one."
"I think you mean two. Whoever the first one was and Hermione," Draco reminded him, "We'll get her to rights soon enough. I'll keep Potter's hands to himself."
Before Snape could respond, Hermione appeared behind Draco.
"Draco, come on. We'll be late for lunch." Hermione smiled at him, then looked at the front of the room, "Have a good day, Professor Snape."
Draco watched her smile at Snape before turning back to him. Hermione took him by the hand and led him out of the room. As he walked he thought about the way Snape looked at Hermione, and how his eyes had softened at the smile directed at him.