The morning sunlight filters through the hospital windows, casting a warm glow over the sterile room. Today is the day Maddie and I are being discharged. The past few weeks have been a whirlwind of medical tests, counseling sessions, and an overwhelming amount of paperwork to get Maddie placed into our care officially.
"Ready to go home?" Will asks as he helps me into a wheelchair. Despite my protests, hospital protocol dictates I leave this way. I glance over at Maddie, who looks tiny and fragile in her own wheelchair, her eyes wide with a mix of curiosity and fear.
"As ready as I'll ever be," I reply with a smile, though inside, I'm anxious about how Maddie will adjust to her new environment.
Maddie clings to my hand as we make our way to the car. Will lifts her gently into the back seat, and I settle beside her. Her hand never leaves mine. I can see the tension in her body, the way she keeps glancing nervously at Will.
"It's okay, Maddie," I reassure her softly. "We're going home now. You're safe."
She nods but doesn't let go of my hand.
As we pull up to our house, I see the familiar welcome sign hanging on the front door, a stark contrast to the cold, clinical environment we've left behind. I'm looking forward to being surrounded by the warmth and comfort of home, but I know that for Maddie, this is all new and potentially overwhelming.
"Welcome home," Will says softly as he opens the car door for me. I step out slowly, still stiff from my injuries. Maddie hesitates for a moment before climbing out, her eyes darting around, taking in everything.
Henry runs out of the house, his little face lighting up when he sees me. "Mommy!" he shouts, launching himself into my arms.
"Hey, sweetie," I say, hugging him tightly. "I missed you so much."
Henry looks curiously at Maddie. "Hi, I'm Henry. What's your name?"
Maddie shrinks back slightly, her grip on my hand tightening. "This is Maddie," I say gently. "She's going to be staying with us for a while."
Henry smiles brightly. "Hi, Maddie! Do you want to see my toys?"
Maddie gives a small nod, but she stays close to me as we walk inside. The house feels like a haven after the hospital. The familiar scent of home—lavender and vanilla—welcomes us, and the cozy furnishings offer a sense of safety.
Will brings in our bags and sets them down. "Why don't we get you both settled in?" he suggests.
I lead Maddie to her room, a cozy space we've set up next to Henry's. It's decorated in soft pastels with a few stuffed animals and books on the shelves. "This is your room, Maddie. You can decorate it however you like."
She looks around, her eyes wide with wonder. "It's... it's nice."
"I'm glad you like it," I say. "If you need anything, just let me know, okay?"
Maddie nods, still holding onto my hand. I guide her to sit on the bed, hoping to make her feel more at ease. "I'm going to be right next door if you need me."
The afternoon passes quietly. Maddie stays close to me, and I can see how nervous she is around Will. He's patient, giving her space and time to adjust. Henry tries to include Maddie in his play, but she remains reserved, watching from the sidelines.
Later that evening, as we gather for dinner, Maddie's anxiety becomes more apparent. Her hands tremble slightly as she picks at her food, and she keeps glancing at Will, her eyes filled with unease.
After dinner, while Henry is busy with his toys, Maddie and I settle on the couch. I can see the exhaustion in her eyes, the weight of her trauma pressing down on her.
"Do you want to watch a movie?" I suggest, hoping to distract her.
She nods, but as we start the movie, I notice her breathing becoming more rapid. She's trying to keep it together, but the strain is evident. I place a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "It's okay, Maddie. You're safe here."
Her eyes fill with tears, and she starts to hyperventilate. "I... I can't breathe..."
I pull her into my arms, holding her close. "Shh, it's okay. Just breathe with me, Maddie. In and out, slowly."
Will stands nearby, concern etched on his face. "Do you need me to call someone?" he asks quietly.
"No, I've got her," I say, my voice calm and steady. "Just give us a moment."
I continue to soothe Maddie, rubbing her back gently. Gradually, her breathing slows, and she begins to calm down. "You're doing great, Maddie. Just keep breathing."
Eventually, she relaxes in my arms, exhausted from the panic attack. "I'm sorry," she whispers, her voice trembling.
"There's nothing to be sorry about," I say softly. "You're safe now. We're here for you."
As bedtime approaches, I tuck Henry in, reading him a story until he falls asleep. Then, I return to Maddie's room, where she's curled up on her bed, looking small and vulnerable.
"Do you want me to stay with you until you fall asleep?" I ask.
She nods, and I sit beside her, stroking her hair gently. "You're not alone anymore, Maddie. I'm right here."
Eventually, her eyes flutter closed, and she drifts off to sleep. I watch her for a while, my heart aching for everything she's been through.
Later that night, I'm awakened by a muffled scream. I rush to Maddie's room and find her thrashing in her bed, caught in the grip of a nightmare.
"Maddie, wake up," I say gently, shaking her shoulder. "It's just a dream."
She wakes with a start, her eyes wide with fear. "JJ... he was there... he was hurting me..."
I pull her into my arms, holding her tightly. "It's okay, Maddie. It was just a nightmare. You're safe now. No one can hurt you here."
She clings to me, sobbing. "I'm so scared, JJ."
"I know," I whisper, rocking her gently. "But I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. We're going to get through this together."
Eventually, her sobs subside, and she falls back to sleep in my arms. As I hold her, I promise myself that I will do everything in my power to help her heal.