The Mayhem Critic
Hello, my fellow readers. It is I, the great James Stryker bringing you another hilarious chapter of The Mayhem Critic. Today, this is a co-review with fellow reader Boris Yeltsin and we're both movie buffs. Today, we're going to be reviewing the 1989 film The Fly II, the sequel to the 1986 movie directed by David Cronenberg. Today, the Sean the Mayhem Critic and his friend Brian take a look at the 1989 sequel The Fly II and ask the question, does The Fly really deserve a sequel? So here it is, the new chapter of The Mayhem Critic. Enjoy.
P.S.: I do not own anything involved in this story and all material belong to their respective sources. The Fly II is owned by 20th Century Fox and Brooksfilm.
Episode Seventeen
The Fly II
(Before the review starts, we get an intro of the Mayhem Critic. It starts with a shot of Sean's house after we see the sun shining. We then see Sean getting up out of bed and getting ready to start the day while Tears for Fears' Everybody Wants to Rule the World play out. Next, we see Sean going to a movie theater while reading a newspaper, he reads an article about Kim Possible, the live action movie for Disney Channel and the cast they picked out to play Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable, the two actors are revealed to be newcomer Sadie Stanley and Sean Giambrone from ABC's The Goldbergs. A shocked look appears on Sean's face as he throws the newspaper down and enters the movie theater to go see Teen Titans Go! to the Movies and realizes what he's about to go see and runs out of the movie theater)
We see Sean a.k.a. the Mayhem Critic sitting at his desk once more, this time he's wearing a Cincinnati Reds baseball cap on his head. "Good evening ladies and gentlemen, I'm Sean the Mayhem Critic. The critic that rips movies a new one. And sitting right next to me and joining me for another guest co-review is my friend Brian. Who you might recognize him from our review of Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers the Movie."
"Hey, Sean. Thanks for bringing me here again." Brian said as he shook Sean's hand.
"Let's talk about David Cronenberg's The Fly." Sean said as clips from the 1986 remake start playing.
(Clips from The Fly (1986) are shown)
Brian: (Narrating) It's one of the great sci-fi/body horror films ever.
Sean: (Narrating) The movie tells the tragic tale of Seth Brundle, a brilliant scientist who transforms himself into a fly after an experiment gone wrong. The movie was a perfect mix of sci-fi, horror and drama.
Brian: (Narrating) The movie was a big hit and it won an Academy Award for Best Makeup and a Saturn Award for Best Actor. It's still considered one of the best horror films ever and one of David Cronenberg's finest work yet.
"But you can't talk about The Fly without bringing up The Fly II." Sean said.
(The title card for The Fly II is shown, as well as clips from the movie)
Sean: (Narrating) Released on February 10, 1989. The film had very little to do with Cronenberg's film, David Cronenberg did not return to direct the sequel. The film is directed by Chris Walas, who was known for creating the makeup effects for the first film.
Brian: (Narrating) The film picks up after the events of The Fly. Tells the story about the son of Brundlefly. Although, there were several different ideas that were thrown around for The Fly II. One of these ideas involved cloning technology to bring Seth Brundle back from the dead and Veronica Quaife dealing with the evils of the Bartok company. Originally, Jeff Goldblum and Geena Davis was supposed to return for this sequel.
Sean: (Narrating) There were a few changes to the movie and no one reprised their roles for the movie. Except for John Getz. But nobody who worked on the first film returned for the second one.
"So, does The Fly deserve a sequel?" Brian asked.
"Well, let's take a look at The Fly II and…try not to get our hopes up." Sean said.
(The film opens with the 20th Century Fox logo. Instead of the traditional Fox fanfare music, it is replaced by the sound of flies buzzing)
"Hold on. I think there's a fly buzzing around the room." Sean said as he pulls out a can of Raid bug spray from underneath his desk and starts spraying around the room while Brian starts coughing.
"Dude, really?!" Brian asked, coughing.
Brian: (V/O) We're literally going to start the film off with the sound of flies buzzing?
"Could be worse. Could've been this." Sean said.
(The 20th Century Fox logo is shown. Instead of the Fox fanfare playing, the song Lollipop from Riverdale starts playing)
"Well, yeah. There's that." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) The film opens to the evil Bartok Industries. You know, the same Bartok Industries that was mentioned in the first film that financed Brundle's teleportation experiments and we see that Veronica Quaife, once again played by Geena…you're not Geena Davis.
"Wait a minute. If that's not Geena Davis, then who the hell is that?" Sean asked.
"That is Saffron Henderson. She's a Canadian voice actress and singer." Brian said as a photo of Saffron Henderson pops up.
"What has she done?" Sean asked.
"Well, she played the voice of Kid Goku and Kid Gohan in the English dubs of Dragon Ball and Dragon Ball Z. And she's done some live action work as well. In fact, the same year she was on another horror movie." Brian said until Sean began to realize what movie she was on.
"Holy shit and shove me in it. Now I remember who she is. She played that rocker chick J.J. on Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan." Sean said, rubbing his head.
"Yup, the one who got her head bashed in with her own guitar." Brian said.
Brian: (Narrating) Anyway, we see that Veronica, played by Saffron Henderson, is going into labor. Please be human, please be human.
Sean: (Narrating) And we see that Stathis, once again played by John Getz, looks on. For about one minute.
Stathis Borans (Played by John Getz): Something's wrong, goddamn it. Do something, goddamn it! Help her!
Dr. Jainway (Played by Ann Marie Lee): You're too excitable, Mr. Borans. I'm forced to have you taken somewhere you can calm down. Screaming will not help anyone now.
"Oh, yeah. The doctors at Bartok Industries know what they're doing…NOT!" Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) The doctors kick Stathis out of the movie, for awhile. Don't worry, we'll see him again later on in the film. As Veronica is giving birth to the Brundle baby, we're introduced to the evil Anton Bartok, played by the late Lee Richardson from The Exorcist III: Legion.
(Veronica pushes out the cocoon and screams)
"Oh, God! This is just like her nightmare! It's happening for real!" Brian exclaimed.
Brian: (Narrating) So, Veronica's nightmare came true as she gives birth to a squirming larvae sac, then dies from shock.
(The monitors flatline as Veronica dies)
Doctor: She's gone.
"Wow! An established well-liked character being killed off on the opening scene. Boy, this movie is getting good." Sean said in a sarcastic tone. "Like when have we seen that before ever in a movie?"
(A clip from Halloween 5 plays where Michael stabs Rachel with a pair of scissors. The next clip plays from Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers plays where Michael kills Jamie by impaling her on a corn thresher and disemboweling her. The last clip from Halloween: Resurrection plays, showing the scene where Michael kills his sister Laurie Strode by stabbing her and throwing her off the roof)
Sean and Brian, who are both fans of the Halloween film franchise, both look at the camera in disgust.
"Never. Play. Those. Scenes. Ever. Again." Sean said.
Brian: (Narrating) But wait, there's something moving in the cocoon, and we see the offspring of Veronica and Brundlefly. Despite being a monstrous cocoon, it turns out to be a perfectly human baby.
(The doctor is seen holding the seemingly normal baby boy)
Sean and Brian stayed quiet for a bit.
"Okay, you definitely know that joke is coming." Sean said.
(The scene plays again, this time with the song Circle of Life from The Lion King plays)
"Hey, originally we opted for the Map Room score from Raiders of the Lost Ark." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) After we see the birth of baby Brundle, we get our opening credits and we get to listen to composer Christopher Young's music score. Which is alright. I mean, I like Howard Shore's music score from the first one better. But this guy composed the music for Hellraiser and Hellbound: Hellraiser II and Tobe Hooper's Invaders From Mars. But the music is still pretty good.
Brian: (Narrating) We see that the film was written by Mick Garris, Jim and Ken Wheat and Frank Darabont.
"Whoa, hold it. Jim and Ken Wheat. They're the ones that wrote the first Riddick movie Pitch Black and A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master. And Mick Garris directed film adaptations of Stephen King stories like Sleepwalkers with Madchen Amick and The Stand with Molly Ringwald. And Frank Darabont was the executive producer of the first and second seasons of AMC's The Walking Dead and he also directed film adaptations of Stephen King's novels like The Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile and The Mist.
"Yup." Brian said.
"Boy, this is going to be a good movie." Sean said with a smile on his face.
Sean: (Narrating) After our opening credits, we see Bartok having a meeting with the scientists about the child.
Anton Bartok (Played by the late Lee Richardson): I want you to take care of him as if he were my very own. You will all answer to Dr. Jainway. She, in turn, will answer to me. I, in turn, will answer to nobody but God. From God's mouth to your ears. That is the chain of command.
"And you, in turn, shall answer to Satan." Brian said.
Brian: (Narrating) Jainway…
(A photo of Captain Kathryn Janeway from Star Trek: Voyager pops up)
Brian: (Chuckles) Wrong Janeway. Her last name is spelled differently. She's one of the lab turncoats for Bartok Industries, she's played by Ann Marie Lee. And you already know Mr. Evil CEO Man Anton Bartok and Sean mentioned that Lee Richardson was on The Exorcist III: Legion. We learn that the child of Veronica Quaife and Seth Brundle is aging faster than any normal human being. We also learn that his physical and mental maturity is highly accelerated and he has a photographic memory like Olive Doyle from A.N.T. Farm.
Sean: (Narrating) We learn that his active genes are just boring as human ones and the mutant genes are dormant.
"Oh, no. He's got the Robin Williams' Jack disease." Sean said, referencing the Francis Ford Coppola film starring the late Robin Williams.
Brian: (Narrating) And then, we're introduced to little Martin Brundle, who's 4-years-old. He's played by Matthew Moore.
Anton Bartok: What a handsome young man you are. Do you know who I am?
Martin Brundle, age 4 (Played by Matthew Moore): Yes. You're one of the people who lives behind the mirror.
Anton Bartok: Well, my name is Mr. Bartok. I'd like you to think of me as your dad. Martin? What's that behind your ear?
(He does a magic trick and holds up a quarter)
Anton Bartok: Aah! Hey!
(Martin giggles)
"Not only Anton Bartok is an evil CEO. He's also a great magician. Move aside, David Blaine." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) We skip ahead to when Martin looks about 10-years-old and mind you that he's three. Martin at age 10 is played by Harley Cross. We see that the lab techs make him do tests that he easily pass and that they give the kid free reign to create whatever the hell they want just to annoy them.
Dr. Shepard (Played by Frank C. Turner, credited as Frank Turner): You've outdone yourself. But what else does it do?
(Martin squirts water from the helmet on Dr. Shepard's face)
"Ooh, bad idea to be spraying water on Beverly Marsh's father's face." Sean said.
(A clip from the Stephen King miniseries It plays)
Alvin Marsh (Played by Frank C. Turner): (After chasing Beverly out of the house) You get the hell right back here, Bevvy! And in front of God, I'll whip the skin off of you!
"He'll learn it's not all fun and games though." Brian said, sipping his wine.
Brian: (Narrating) Also, we learn that Martin tend to piss Dr. Jainway off because he has to take some shots for him to stay alive.
Martin Brundle, age 10 (Played by Harley Cross): How come I don't have Zone Four clearance?
Dr. Jainway: Because you're only a Zone Three project. You're fidgeting again!
Martin Brundle, age 10: It's normal behavior. I read it in a book for mothers.
"Jeez, Dr. Jainway can be such a bitch." Sean said.
"Yeah. Some mother for this kid." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) We see the adventures of Martin Brundle as we see him granting himself Zone Four access by creating himself a keycard and sneak around the Bartok complex because the idiots at Bartok do a great job at keeping track of him.
Brian: (Narrating) While exploring the complex, Martin enters a room filled with laboratory animals and makes a friend, an adorable golden retriever.
Martin Brundle, age 10: You know, I've got this disease. It's so rare there's only been two people who've ever had it – my father and now me. They've even named it after him. It's called Brundle's Accelerated Growth Syndrome.
"So, Martin's got BAGS." Sean rolled his eyes.
(A clip from Ghoulies plays)
Rebecca (Played by Lisa Pelikan): That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
Sean: (Narrating) Not only he sneaks around the complex, not once but twice as we see that Bartok has continued research on Seth's telepods and we see his furry friend that he made friends with a scene before. Not only have the scientists managed to reassemble the telepods but they attempt to test it out by using the dog.
"Oh, dear. This isn't going to end well. We've seen this happened before when Seth attempts to teleport the baboon." Sean said.
(A clip from David Cronenberg's The Fly plays, showing a scene where Seth teleports a baboon with gory results)
"Oh, boy." Brian said, knowing what might happen.
(The dog is teleported to another telepod. The door to the other telepod opens as the scientist checks)
Scientist: It worked! He's moving around! He's still alive!
"Well, so far so good." Sean said.
(However, the dog comes out mutated and bites three of the scientist's fingers off)
"OH, SHIT!" Sean and Brian both yelled out.
(Martin screams as Dr. Jainway and Bartok notice that he was watching)
Dr. Jainway: How the hell did he get in here?
Anton Bartok: It's all right. It's all right. It's all right.
(Bartok tries to comfort Martin)
"Oh, shit! Martin, it's okay. It's just a dream. You didn't see anything, it was just your imagination. Just go back to your room. Your friend is alright." Sean said, imitating the character Anton Bartok.
Brian: (Narrating) We time skip to two years later and we see that it's Martin's fifth birthday.
Sean: (Narrating) We also see that Martin's body has matured to a body of a 25-year-old. Grown-up Martin is played by Eric Stoltz, who was 27-years-old at the time.
"A little fun fact about Eric Stoltz, he was originally cast as Marty McFly for Back to the Future in late 1984. But he was replaced after about a month of filming when Michael J. Fox agreed to divide time between the movie and Family Ties." Brian said.
"Originally, he was supposed to be Marty McFly. Now, he's Marty McFly." Sean said as a comedic rimshot is heard and the sound of crickets chirping is heard while Brian gives him a look. "Get it? His name is Martin and he's a fly. That's why he's called…eh, forget it."
"Well, let's see what Uncle Anton has as a birthday gift for the big boy, huh?" Brian said.
Anton Bartok: Say the magic word and make the mirror disappear.
(Bartok hands Martin the champagne bottle and Martin throws the bottle at the two-way mirror, breaking it)
Brian: (Narrating) Actually, Bartok presents Martin with a bungalow on the facility's property. So, yeah. Martin has his own place.
Martin Brundle (Played by Eric Stoltz): You mean, this is mine? This is my place?
Anton Bartok: Your place. Your private place. No more mirrors, no more prying eyes.
"Unless you count Donald Trump and the NSA. Oh, and we will be monitoring your Facebook feed and your Twitter as well." Sean said, imitating Bartok again.
Sean: (Narrating) But all this hospitality comes at a high price though when Bartok offers Martin a position at Bartok Industries and he wants him on board for the telepod project as tests tend to screw up. As tempting this offer sounds, Martin is feeling uneasy about working on the telepods.
Martin Brundle: I don't like these things.
Anton Bartok: It's because of the dog, isn't it? How long are you gonna hold that against me?
"Uh, until the climax of the movie. That's how long I'm gonna hold that against you." Brian said, imitating Martin Brundle.
Brian: (Narrating) Martin won't be starting from square one, so Bartok presents him with some videos of his father to that documented his progress with the telepods.
Seth Brundle (Played by Jeff Goldblum): (On video) I don't know. It's possible that the teleporter has somehow improved me.
"They didn't bring Jeff Goldblum back for the film. That's actually a deleted scene from the first film that they figured out a way to use in the second film. And it's actually pretty neat, I have to commend them." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) After listening to the ramblings of his father, Martin decides to test the telepods out by successfully teleporting a telephone and it still works. Wanting to teleport living things, Martin goes in search of organic matter until he runs into Beth Logan, played by Daphne Zuniga.
Beth Logan (Played by Daphne Zuniga): Are you new here?
Martin Brundle: I've been here five years.
Beth Logan: Five years, and they still have you working nights.
"In case you're wondering, yes, that's the same Daphne Zuniga who played Princess Vespa in Spaceballs. A little fun fact, Mel Brooks was a secret producer of The Fly and The Fly II and he suggested her for this one." Sean said. "And another little fun fact, I almost met Daphne Zuniga at the Comic Expo last year in my city, but I was sad that I didn't get a chance to meet her because I could've told her how much I've enjoyed Spaceballs and The Fly II. But I did end up meeting Julian Glover from Game of Thrones and Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Ralph Macchio from The Outsiders and The Karate Kid, John Ratzenberger from Toy Story and Cheers and Wallace Shawn from The Princess Bride and Toy Story."
"Lucky bastard." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) Martin befriends Beth and he borrows her cactus to test out the telepod.
"Watch the needles." Brian warned.
"Yeah, because I've seen people hurting themselves on cacti before." Sean said.
(A clip from TruTV's World's Dumbest Daredevils plays, showing a clip of a guy jumping from out of a pickup truck and into some cacti)
(The teleported cactus comes out looking weird)
Beth Logan: What's that?
"It's a cactus. What the hell do you think it was?" Sean asked.
Brian: (Narrating) Luckily, Beth isn't upset that her cactus got messed up in the telepod and tells Martin that he could keep it and she tells him that he should beta-test the program. Martin and Beth taking a liking to each other and they become friends. Also, let's establish another character here. An asshole security guard named Scooby, I mean, Scorby. He's played by Garry Chalk.
"Garry Chalk is also a voice actor who you might recognize him as the voice of Optimus Prime and Optimus Primal in Beast Wars: Transformers, Beast Machines, Transformers: Armada, Transformers Energon and Transformers Cybertron. Also, he voiced the character Grounder in The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog and Dr. Robotnik in Sonic Underground." Sean said.
"It's Dr. Eggman." Dave said.
"You shut up, Dave! We're sticking with Robotnik! Eggman is a silly name and I didn't care for that name and we're gonna keep calling him Robotnik." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Also, we see that Scooby, I mean, Scorby, has it in for Martin… because… he's trying to bully Martin.
Scorby (Played by Garry Chalk): Hey, Marty. What's the good word? Got yourself a girlfriend now?
Martin Brundle: No.
Scorby: Too bad. Nice ass.
"Ugh, hope he gets killed at some point." Brian said.
"Agreed." Sean said.
Brian: (Narrating) The next day, Martin gushes about sleeping for two hours. This is because his accelerated growth condition may be slowing and him being more normal because he used to never sleep.
(Dr. Jainway gives Martin a shot, but the needle breaks)
Martin Brundle: Aah! Ow!
Dr. Jainway: Uh! That's what you get for not sitting still!
"Bitch, who the fuck are you yelling at?! My god, these people at Bartok Industries are assholes! Assholes that deserve a good killing. And note to self: cancel my appointment with Dr. Jainway." Sean said.
Dr. Jainway: Now, let's try it again.
Martin Brundle: I don't think so.
"And to think I was gonna see her for my leg issues." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) We have more important matters to discuss. Let's see what's going on with Martin and Beth. We get a montage of them dancing and working on the telepods and Beth teaching Martin how to fish while country music is playing.
Brian: (Narrating) After that montage, Beth invites Martin to a party at the specimens division. And when Martin arrives, something else catches his attention when a group of observers talk about a certain specimen that they kept for two years. And curiosity has the best of him when Martin decides to check out what everyone was gawking at, and lo and behold.
(It is revealed that Bartok kept the mutated dog alive and studied)
"Oh, God. What is Chris Walas doing to us? As a lover of both dogs and cats, this has got to be one of the saddest scenes ever just to see that poor dog suffer." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Martin gets pissed, thinking that Beth is aware of the dog's imprisonment and does what a person does on Facebook to stop being friends with them. He unfriends her.
Beth Logan: I thought we were friends!
Martin Brundle: I thought we were too.
Beth Logan: Look, I didn't know that animal…
Martin Brundle: Stay out of my sector! You no longer have clearance.
Sean starts laughing a bit. "Yeah, he's just like a 5-year-old."
Brian: (Narrating) Martin head's down to the animal's holding pen to go see the deformed dog and the dog remembers him…
"Okay, so the film was written by two directors who worked on film adaptations of Stephen King novels and Frank Darabont was one of them. This guy directed The Shawshank Redemption and The Green Mile. Oh, no. This is a really sad scene." Sean said.
(Martin tearfully euthanizes it with chloroform to end it's suffering)
Sean: (V/O) Oh, Jesus!
"This movie received a certain amount of backlash mostly because of this scene. Many viewers were disturbed by the dog's appearance and sad fate. In the DVD commentary, director Chris Walas said that the audience would feel more sympathy for mutated dog than a human." Sean said.
"You mind telling that to David Cronenberg? There was a deleted scene involving Seth merging a cat and a baboon together and it comes out deformed and he ends up beating it to death with a metal pipe." Brian said.
(The infamous deleted scene from David Cronenberg's The Fly plays, showing Seth beating the deformed monkey-cat to death)
"Next?" Brian asked.
Brian: (Narrating) After putting his friend to sleep, we cut to Martin scanning himself in the telepod and Bartok questions him about the "incident" in the Specimens Division.
Anton Bartok: Someone broke in and caused some damage. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you?
"Stick to your story, kid. It's not a lie if you believe it." Sean said.
Martin Brundle: No.
Dr. Jainway: He's lying.
Anton Bartok: Of course he's lying.
"Oh, come on. It's not like you caught him with sprinkles on his face and lying about eating them." Brian said.
(Cutaway gag)
Sean: (as Bartok) Martin, an unfortunate incident has happened in the kitchen. Do you by any chance have anything to do with the sprinkles?
Brian: (as Martin with sprinkles around his mouth) No.
Sadie, Sean's friend: (as Jainway) He's lying.
Sean: I know. Our dear Martin is growing up.
(Cutaway gag ends)
Sean: (Narrating) And speaking of growing up, Martin forgives Beth and grants her clearance to the lab again. He even presents her with an adorable little kitten.
"Awww, isn't that kitten cute? I'm naming him Milo." Sean said, smiling.
"It's not a tabby, is it?" Brian asked.
"It is. It's a tabby." Sean said.
"Nice." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) Now, I'm sure that Martin won't do anything to the kitten….
(Martin takes the kitten)
Beth Logan: Where are you going?
"Martin, what the fuck are you doing?" Sean asked.
Beth Logan: Martin, you can't do that.
Martin Brundle: It's all right. Initiate the sequence.
Beth Logan: No, I can't.
"He can't possibly be serious." Brian said.
"Martin, I swear if something bad happens to the kitten, I swear on the six-armed god of yoga." Sean said.
Martin Brundle: Trust me.
Sean then pulls out his Beretta M9 pistol from out of his desk while Brian picks up his golf club.
"My friend, this is not going to be your lucky day. You're going to end up like your father." Brian said.
(Beth presses the button on the keyboard to initiate the sequence and teleports the kitten. The kitten comes out of the telepod and meows. The kitten is revealed to be looking normal)
Sean is now seen holding his cat Riley.
"Wow, it really works!" Sean smiled and looked at Riley. "Yeah, it does."
Brian: (Narrating) The kitten turned out fine and the success of the telepods impressed Beth and she asks him how did he do it and Martin says a bunch of scientific babble and teaching the computer to learn how to love the flesh.
Sean: (Narrating) And speaking of flesh, Martin and Beth become lovers and…
(We cut to a sex scene between Martin and Beth)
Sean: (V/O) Oh, my God.
(A dramatic sting plays)
Sean: (V/O) Oh, my God!
"BAD TOUCH!" Sean and Brian both yelled out as an alarm goes off and Sean picks up his phone.
"911 Emergency? I know this is going to sound crazy but Princess Vespa is having sex with a grown man and he's 5-years-old. You have to go over there and arrest her. HURRY!" Sean freaks out.
Brian: (V/O) Well, I guess you can say that Martin lost his virginity at a young age.
(A comedic rimshot is heard and a clip from David Cronenberg's The Fly plays)
Veronica Quaife (Played by Geena Davis): You're disgusting, as always.
Sean: (Narrating) After an inspirational boink, we cut to Martin devises a potential cure for his condition, which involves swapping out his mutated genes for healthy human genes from point A to point B. But then, a crisis emerges when Marty McFly is showing signs of his mutation when he noticed some white stuff coming out of his arm and he knows that it's not an infection.
Brian: (Narrating) Meanwhile with Beth, she is suddenly transferred across town when Scooby, I mean Scorby, breaks the news to her.
Scorby: We've already sent your personal effects over. I guess that's what you get for fucking around with Bartok's pet freak, huh? (Hands her the videotape) For your eyes only.
"Anton, you're a shithead." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) They also cut access between Martin and Beth. And like most 5-year-olds in the 80's, he knows how to rewire electronics and he's able to communicate with Beth.
Beth Logan: Martin, I was transferred. They found out about us. Bartok knows about us.
Martin Brundle: How could he? We've never told anyone.
Beth Logan: Because he saw us! He videotaped us in bed!
(We cut to Martin storming into his house in anger)
Sean starts chuckling a bit. "I'm sorry. The way he entered his home was hilarious. If Bartok filmed me and my girlfriend in bed, this is what would happen." Sean said.
(Cutaway gag)
(Sean enters Bartok's office. He is armed with an MP5K)
Sean: Bartok, you spying son of a bitch! Time for you and your goons to die!
(Cutaway gag ends)
Brian: (Narrating) Turns out that Bartok has kept Martin under surveillance for his entire life and Martin throws the mother of all temper tantrums just like a 5-year-old and they bugged his home with video cameras. He kicks the door to the surveillance room down and chases the technicians out of the room and catch up on some history of himself and the startling truth about his father's fate.
(Martin watches a video, which was footage from the 1986 film)
Seth Brundle: (On video) A fly… got into the… transmitter pod with me that first time when I was alone. The computer got confused. There weren't supposed to be two separate genetic patterns, and it decided to… splice us together. It made us a human fly.
Sean: (Narrating) After learning about his father's fate, Bartok confronts Martin and explains to him why he's been lying to him for all of his life because he's been waiting for his inevitable mutation and his plan to use Martin's body and the telepods for genetic manipulation for profit.
Anton Bartok: This was planned from the day you were born. We'll do everything we can to make it as painless as possible for you.
"Dude, you lied to Martin. He trusted you. There's no way he's going to reason with you." Brian said.
Brian: (Narrating) Martin makes his escape but Bartok send Scorby to stop him.
Scorby: You want out? You have to go through me, Marty.
Sean: (V/O as Martin) Sure, don't mind if I…
(Scorby punches Martin in the face)
Sean: (V/O as Martin) Ow! You crotch-grabber!
Scorby: I enjoyed that tape of you and your girlfriend. Girl goes like a jackhammer, doesn't she?
"Run Marty, run!" Brian said.
(Martin grabs Scorby and throws him out the window)
Sean: (Narrating) Martin escapes from Bartok Industries and figures what better place to hide out at. Well, on Beth's houseboat. He sees Beth and tells her about what's going on with him. Beth agrees to help him and with Bartok on their tail, the two are on the run and they go to visit the one man that would be able to help them out. A certain bearded douchebag.
(Martin and Beth arrive at Stathis' house)
Beth Logan: (Clears throat) We have to talk to you, sir.
Stathis Borans: I said, piss off!
"Some host he is." Brian said.
Martin Brundle: Seth Brundle was my father.
(Stathis opens the door and sees Martin)
Stathis Borans: Striking family resemblance. A little big for five years old, aren't you?
"Well, Jeff Goldblum is one tall motherfucker." Sean said.
Brian: (Narrating) Stathis lets them in and we see that he's been having better days. More like having one too many chicken sandwich sandwiches. Beth and Martin talk to Stathis about a cure for Martin. And Stathis proceeds to be a drunken douchebag.
Stathis Borans: Brundle stole my girl. Your mother. Got her pregnant. Caused her death. Dissolved my hand and my foot with fly vomit. I had no love for the man. He bugged me.
"Booo!" Sean and Brian both yelled out.
Stathis Borans: As for the cure he was working on… he dragged your mother kicking and screaming into that telepod that they might be fused together in one beautiful body. So your mother blew his brains out with a shotgun. There's your cure.
Beth Logan: You bastard! Where's your compassion?
Stathis Borans: (Chuckling) I had to give it up. It cost me an arm and a leg.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the least helpful man on the Earth!" Brian exclaimed, imitating Kevin McCaffrey.
Brian: (Narrating) Stathis eventually tells Martin and Beth that the way to cure Martin is to sacrifice another life to restore his humanity. And he gives them his jeep as a going-away present.
Sean: (Narrating) Meanwhile, back at Bartok Industries. Bartok is trying to use the telepods but he is unable to use them because Martin has installed a password and he booby-trapped it. Which means, type in one wrong password it'll erase all internl programming. So, in order to use the telepods, Bartok needs Martin for the password.
Anton Bartok: Clever. Clever boy.
"That is a genius idea. I should have my laptop booby-trapped so no one could use it. But I have some important fanfiction stories that I don't want to lose." Sean said.
Brian: (Narrating) Meanwhile, Martin and Beth are still on the run from Bartok and they're holding up in a motel room, where Beth wakes up to see Martin's condition drastically changes.
Beth Logan: Y-You need help.
Martin Brundle: (His voice is deepening) You don't think I can take care of myself?
Beth Logan: No. You can't walk. I… think you're getting worse.
Martin Brundle: I'm getting better. My body is growing… stronger. I feel good.
Beth Logan: You don't know what you're saying.
Martin Brundle: I do know what I'm saying.
Brian: (Narrating) It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye.
(Martin removes his human right eye, revealing an insect eye)
Martin Brundle: I can see so much better now. Beth, if you stay awhile, I'll show you a magic trick you'll never forget.
(A clip from Scary Movie plays)
Shorty (Played by Marlon Wayans): Run, bitch, run!
Sean: (Narrating) All this is getting freaky for Beth. So she says, "screw running" and ends up calling Bartok. Bartok and his team arrive and he questions Martin for the password. Martin doesn't tell Bartok, so they send Marty McFly back to Bartok Industries, where Martin is enveloped in a cocoon.
"And cue the final transformation." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) Since Martin is completing his metamorphosis, Bartok doesn't need him for the password, so he interrogates Beth for it.
"Dumb idea, even she doesn't know it." Brian pointed out.
Brian: (Narrating) Back with Martin, we see that Dr. Jainway is alone in the room with the cocoon examining him and he emerges from his cocoon. Well, that was quick. So much for it being at least a week. And thus, "Martinfly is born and he goes after his first victim.
(Dr. Jainway screams as Martinfly kills her after he emerges from his cocoon)
"And the body count has started." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) And this turns into your standard sci-fi horror flick. With the original film being a sci-fi horror tragedy, this becomes a sci-fi horror action flick. With Martin on the loose, Bartok sends Scorby and his security team armed with MP5 assault rifles to stop Martinfly. Oh and they send in their Rottweiler, that Martin doesn't kill but pets him because he cares for animals, dammit. Instead, he goes after Beverly Marsh's abusive father and kills him and throws him at one of the security guards like a ragdoll.
"Another thing I like about this movie is the design of Martinfly. Don't get me wrong, I like it better than the design of Brundlefly from the first film. Plus, Chris Walas wanted to show off the nifty creature effects and gore. In fact, I like this part coming up right now." Sean said.
(Martin fly appears and spits acid on the guard's face and the guard tears his face off)
"Wow, he doesn't fuck around." Brian said.
Dr. Trimble (Played by William S. Taylor, credited as William Taylor): Just tell them to kill it!
Anton Bartok: Don't be an idiot. I need a live subject for study. Martin's no use to me dead.
Scorby: He might be right, Mr. Bartok. Your Martin's already killed three people.
Anton Bartok: Well, that's tragic and sad, but I haven't come this far to lose everything now.
(Martin cuts the power)
Anton Bartok: Clever. Clever boy.
"You were saying, old man?" Sean asked, imitating Scorby while holding an uzi.
Brian: (Narrating) Martin goes through the air duct and breaks into Bay 17, where he confronts Bartok. Scorby shoots Martin, injuring him. And Martin throws Hargis, played by Andrew Rhodes into an elevator shaft, where this happens.
(Hargis' head is crushed like a watermelon underneath an elevator, instantly killing him as Beth screams)
"Oh, my God! Dude, that was the best kill ever." Sean said.
"Fun fact, this was the scene that gave some controversy with the MPAA, they originally gave the movie an "X" rating because of the movie's graphic violence." Brian said.
Sean: (Narrating) But Scooby, I mean Scorby, isn't going to take this shit anymore as he starts shooting like a madman and tries to go after Martin.
Anton Bartok: I want him alive, damn you!
(An enraged Scorby points his MP5 at Bartok, then reloads another clip)
"Screw you, Bartok. I'm killing the damn thing!" Sean exclaimed, imitating Scorby once more.
Brian: (Narrating) Scorby looks for Martin and tries to kill him, but instead he kills Trimble.
Scorby: (After he accidentally kills Trimble after thinking he's the fly monster) Fuck!
"Fuck! He was the only black guy in the movie. I'm black, does every movie got to have a black guy that dies first?" Sean asked.
"I can see how you'd think that way. A lot of horror movies tend to do that. Why? I don't know." Brian said, taking a sip of his beer.
Sean: (Narrating) Martinfly grabs Scorby-Doo and snaps his spine like he's Tom Hardy from The Dark Knight Rises.
Anton Bartok: Scorby? Scorby? Where are you?
Sean: (V/O as Scorby) Over heeeeeeeeeere!
(Martin throws Scorby's corpse out in the open)
Brian: (V/O as Martin) Anton!
Sean: (Narrating) And now, only one man left as Martin comes face to face with Bartok, who's armed with a Desert Eagle.
Anton Bartok: Don't do anything rash. I won't hesitate to kill you in a second if I have to.
"Oh, really? You think that a measly Desert Eagle could stop him?" Brian asked.
(Bartok shoots Martin)
"Oh, he's dead. Roll credits. Movie's over." Sean said.
(The end credits are shown)
"He's not gone, not by a long shot." Brian said as the movie continues.
Sean: (Narrating) Okay, I'm kidding. Martin lives after faking out Bartok. He grabs the evil CEO and forces him to type in the password.
(Bartok types in the password. The password is revealed to be "DAD", activating the gene swapping progam)
"Awww, the password is "Dad". The dad he never had." Sean said.
"So, sad." Brian said.
Brian: (Narrating) Martin enters the telepod, dragging Bartok along with him. Martin gestures Beth to activate the sequence while Bartok protests not to activate it. Beth activates the program, teleporting Martinfly and Bartok to the other telepod.
(The door to the other telepod opens up, revealing Bartok as a freakish, grotesque monster)
Sean: (Narrating) With Bartok transformed into a hideous monster, Martin is restored to a fully human form. As for Bartok, he's kept in the same cell where the dog used to be, living the rest of his life as a mutated freak.
"Ironic. Who's laughing now?" Brian asked.
Sean: (Narrating) And the film ends with Bartok crawling around and we get a shot of a fly sitting on the dish.
"And that's how the film ends. Well, there was an alternate ending where Martin and Beth are sitting on Beth's houseboat and Beth asks him if how he's feeling better, much better. But they stuck with the ending where they want to show us how fucked up he looks. Doesn't matter which ending they used, I liked both endings. And that was The Fly II and I think it's a pretty underrated sequel." Sean said.
(Footage from The Fly II is shown)
Sean: (Narrating) This film received negative reviews from critics and many believe that director Chris Walas is set out to repeat the success of the original film.
Brian: (Narrating) Think of the movie as an old 50's monster movie with a lot of gore effects and that's what Walas was going for and the movie is appreciated by many fans of the horror genre.
Sean: (Narrating) And just like underrated sequels like Psycho II and Ghostbusters II, this is one that I really enjoyed. Although, there are some parts that are dumb like the computer making this video game beeping noise. I like that this one was much different than the original. With the first film being sci-fi with horror and drama, this one was a generic monster movie. But coming off The Fly, it really comes off a letdown.
Brian: (Narrating) The acting was pretty good. I enjoyed Eric Stoltz performance as Martin Brundle. And some of the memorable scenes come off as effects eye candy or humor with awkward dialogue.
"A good but underrated sequel. A great follow-up to The Fly. Now, there was a follow-up to The Fly II called The Fly: Outbreak. In that one, it involves Martin Brundle trying to cure the mutated Anton Bartok but he ends up starting an outbreak. Plus, it's a comic. Anyway, check out The Fly II and give this one a chance. That's why we're giving it 3 projectile vomits out of 5. That is it for today's review, I'm Sean the Mayhem Critic." Sean said.
"And I'm his friend Brian." Brian said.
"And we'll see you guys next time." Sean said.
Mayhem Critic Tagline- Clever. Clever boy.
And that was the Mayhem Critic's review of The Fly II. Special thanks to Boris Yeltsin for co-reviewing this movie with me because we both like the sequel and it was pretty underrated. Anyway, next time on The Mayhem Critic, I'm either going to be reviewing the Disney Channel original movie Zombies or since Mother's Day is coming up, I will be taking a look at the Top 11 Moms in Television. See which TV mom made the cut. Which one should I do next? Don't forget to review this story, add this to your favorites and follow it for future updates. I'll see you guys next time for another Mayhem Critic review. Till next time, my fellow readers.