The Mayhem Critic
Aloha, my fellow readers. It is I, the great James Stryker bringing you yet another great and hilarious chapter of The Mayhem Critic. It's October and you know what that means? It's the first annual Halloween Havoc for The Mayhem Critic. Throughout the month of October, I will be reviewing a couple of terrifying features that will chill your bones. My first movie to review for Halloween Havoc is the 1983 thriller Psycho II, the sequel to the 1960 Hitchcock thriller Psycho. Is it the sequel that we've asked for or does it have to be a forgotten gem? We'll find out today in the new chapter of The Mayhem Critic. Enjoy.
P.S.: I do not own anything involved in this story. All material belong to their respective sources. Psycho II is owned by Universal Pictures.
Episode Thirty-Three
Psycho II
We see Sean a.k.a. The Mayhem Critic sitting in his living room once again, this time he is seen wearing a Halloween baseball cap, a t-shirt with a skull on it, blue denim jeans and a pair of white Adidas sneakers. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. I'm Sean the Mayhem Critic, the critic that rips movies a new one. Well, it's October and I wanted to do something special and here it is…. IT'S HALLOWEEN HAVOC!"
(We get an intro parodying the intro to Rod Serling's Night Gallery. Instead it says Sean J. Archer's Halloween Havoc in Eurostile Extended Bold font. The intro ends with Sean wearing fake vampire teeth and the camera hits him in the face, knocking him out)
"Throughout the month of October, I will be taking a look at a few terrifying tales that will curdle your blood. Our first tale, let's talk about one of the most iconic horror movies of all time. Psycho." Sean said.
(Clips from the 1960 film Psycho is shown)
Sean: (Narrating) Based on the 1959 novel of the same name by the late Robert Bloch, the film was directed by the master of suspense himself Alfred Hitchcock and the screenplay was written by Joseph Stefano. It tells the tale of a young woman, played by the late Janet Leigh, who ends up staying at the Bates Motel after embezzling money from her employer. The motel is run by a seemingly innocent man named Norman Bates, played brilliantly by the late Anthony Perkins. Here's something about Norman, he has a slight mommy complex.
Norman Bates (Played by the late Anthony Perkins): A man's best friend is his mother.
Sean: (Narrating) This movie has the most iconic shower scene of all time.
(The scene where Marion Crane gets killed in the shower by "Mother" is shown)
Norman Bates: Mother! Oh, God! Mother! Blood! Blood!
Sean: (Narrating) The film ends with one of the biggest twists ever where we see that, spoiler alert for those of you who haven't seen Psycho, Mother is dead and we see that "Mother" is Norman Bates dressed in drag. He has a split personality. The film was one of the most iconic films of all time with a classic music score by the late Bernard Hermann. The acting, the directing, the music and the cinematography were pretty good. The film also had one of the best endings ever where we see Norman Bates sitting in his cell with that creepy smile on his face. The film had the perfect ending, there's no way that they can continue this.
"Well, with a film that good, there's no way that they could make a sequel out of this. Well, someone in Hollywood got a case of sequelitis and they did. Which brings me to today's topic…Psycho II." Sean said.
(The title is shown as well as clips from the movie are shown)
Sean: (Narrating) Released in 1983, 23 years later after the release of the original. The film takes place 22 years after the events of the original film. There was a sequel to the book called Psycho II, which was unrelated to the film. We get two returning characters from the original and we get some new faces. I did not know that there was a Psycho II when I first saw the film on AMC. The one film I first known about was Psycho III and Psycho IV: The Beginning.
"Is this the sequel that people have been asking for or should it be forgotten? Let's take a look at the film to find out. This is Psycho II." Sean said.
(The film starts and we see the Universal Pictures logo in black and white)
Sean: (Narrating) Our film opens in black and white. Wait a minute, this movie's in black and white? I thought it was in color. Look, it's 1983. We stopped using black and white in movies. Well, sometimes. No, actually the whole film is not in black and white. It's just the movie's way of showing what happened on the night Marion Crane died.
"Really, movie? Do we need to know what happened? Look, we know what happened. Do people who haven't seen the original need to know? You know what? Let me do it for you."
(Cutaway Gag)
Taylor: (While taking a shower) Ah, there's nothing like a nice relaxing hot shower after a long day from work. I just wish that Sean was there to join…
(Sean, dressed as his mother, enters the bathroom and attacks her with a Cosmopolitan Magazine)
Sean: Here's your magazine! Here's your magazine!
(Taylor screams, we see the ink from the magazine in the water. Sean leaves the bathroom as Taylor slumps down. We get a shot of the ink from the magazine going down the drain)
Taylor: Seriously, Sean?! God! I'm dating an idiot!
(Cutaway Gag Ends)
"There! I had to do it for you, movie!" Sean exclaimed.
Sean: (Narrating) After the movie let's us know what happened in the original, we see that the movie goes to color after we get a shot of the Bates house and what we get is not the traditional Psycho music score from the late Bernard Hermann, but instead we get a more somber, melancholy and tragic music score from Jerry Goldsmith. Not a bad choice. The film was written by Tom Holland…
(A photo of Tom Holland, the actor who plays Peter Parker/Spider-Man in Spider-Man: Homecoming is shown)
Sean: (Narrating) No, not that Tom Holland. The other Tom Holland.
(A photo of writer/director Tom Holland is shown)
Sean: (Narrating) There we go. Yes, the same Tom Holland who's known for directing Fright Night, Child's Play and Stephen King's The Langoliers. The film marks the American debut of the late Australian director Richard Franklin, who directed the 1991 film FX 2 and in 1984 he directed the movie Cloak & Dagger, which was also written by Tom Holland and it starred Dabney Coleman and future Psycho IV: The Beginning star Henry Thomas.
"Don't worry, I won't be making any E.T. jokes when I get to review Psycho IV." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) After the opening credits end, we see that it's been 22 years after the events of the first film. We see that Norman Bates, played by Anthony Perkins, is being released. But not everyone is happy about his release, people like…
Lila Loomis (Played by Vera Miles): What about his victims? Don't they have any say? Can you restore them?
"Ugh, people like her." Sean said, rolling his eyes in disgust.
Sean: (Narrating) Lila Crane, I mean Lila Loomis, once again played by Vera Miles, speaks out in the courtroom and ordering the judge not to release Norman Bates out on the streets and she has a petition.
Lila Loomis: Doesn't that give me the right to speak out?
Judge: Has the District Attorney advised Mrs. Loomis about her rights in this matter?
(Cutaway Gag)
Sean: (as the District Attorney Yes, your honor. I explained to the crazy old lady that her petition don't mean jack shit and she can stick that petition up where the sun don't shine.
(Cutaway Gag Ends)
Lila Loomis: Why are you people just sitting here? Don't you realize they're going to release a homicidal maniac?
"Oh, God. Can somebody please hold her in contempt of court, please?" Sean pleaded.
Sean: (Narrating) So, the judge tells Lila Loomis "Fuck your petition, we're letting him loose.", and Norman is released.
Lila Loomis: Are you satisfied, Doctor? Turning a murderer loose on an innocent public?
Dr. Bill Raymond (Played by the late Robert Loggia): Mrs. Loomis, Norman was not convicted of murder. He was found "not guilty" by reason of insanity.
"Norman was found "not guilty" by reason of insanity? You know, back then you can get away with something like that but now there's no way in hell that you can get away with that shit." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) So after Norman's released, his psychiatrist Dr. Bill Raymond, played by the late Robert Loggia, and for some reason they let him go back to the place where the murders started. You think that's a good idea? You don't do that. It's like putting Ed Gein back to the farm, and yet they're fine with it?
"That's just dumb." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) As he returns home, Norman finds that the motel is run under new management and trust me we'll get to the guy in a few moments. But anyway, let's get back to Norman. He returns to his house and as he tries to settle in, it triggered some old memories back to his childhood, like the time he poisoned his mother.
Mrs. Bates: Norman.
(Norman turns to the door and gasps)
Mrs. Bates: Norman, what did you put in my tea?
(The cup shatters)
Mrs. Bates: (Gagging) I'm gonna get you for this, Norman. I'm gonna show you what happens to bad little boys who poison their mothers. I'm going to kill you!
(The door opens and we see a hand on the floor and the door closes)
"Yeah, not a bright idea." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Anyway, we see that Norman is starting his new job at a nearby diner, where he meets a nice old lady named Emma Spool, played by the late Claudia Bryar.
Emma Spool (Played by the late Claudia Bryar): I'm the one who urged Mr. Statler to give you the job. I think it's very Christian to forgive and forget, don't you?
Norman Bates: I sure do.
Sean: (Narrating) We're introduced to the diner's waitress named Myrna, played by Lee Garlington and the cook named Ralph Statler, played by the late Robert Alan Browne.
Mary Samuels (Played by Meg Tilly): (On the phone with her boyfriend) Scott, we have to talk about it sometime.
Ralph Statler (Played by the late Robert Alan Browne): Step on it, would you, girl? You're being paid to wait on tables, not gab on the phone.
"Come on, there's a guy out there waiting for his Frisco melt and fries and you're busy talking on the phone with your boyfriend. Save the dirty talking for later and deliver this man's food." Sean said, imitating Ralph Statler.
"Yo, I asked for a salmon sandwich, fries and a beer. Me!" Brian yelled out.
Sean: (Narrating) Norman, then meets this waitress named Mary Samuels, played by Meg Tilly. Who you might recognize her as the sister of Jennifer Tilly. And we see that Mary has been having some boyfriend troubles.
Mary Samuels: I've been living with my boyfriend for over a year. And all of a sudden, he tells me we're through. And then I just phoned him to ask him why and he wouldn't tell me. All he'd say is that I couldn't come back to our apartment.
"Well, could it occur to you that your boyfriend is sleeping with another woman? That's why he kicked you out of the apartment." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Norman then offers Mary a place to stay and asks her to stay at his motel, and she does. As Norman and Mary arrive at the motel, we see that things are not running a tight ship here and Norman meets the new manager of Bates Motel named Mr. Toomey.
(A clip from Stephen King's The Langoliers is shown)
Craig Toomey (Played by Bronson Pinchot): Scaring the little girl?!
Sean: (Narrating) Wrong Mr. Toomey. I'm talking about Warren Toomey, the new manager of Bates Motel. He's played by Dennis Franz from NYPD Blue. Norman meets Warren Toomey and he doesn't like how he's running the motel.
Norman Bates: What kind of a motel are you running here?
Warren Toomey (Played by Dennis Franz): (Sighing) The kind that makes money. People come here to party. They stay a few hours and then they leave. (Scoffs) What more can you ask from a motel so far from the beaten track, huh?
"Boy, how sleazy could this guy get?" Sean asked. "Man, just watching this guy makes me feel so dirty. I need to take a shower."
Sean: (Narrating) So, Norman fires Mr. Toomey…
(A clip from Stephen King's The Langoliers is shown again)
Craig Toomey: I have an important business meeting in Boston this morning at 9 o'clock!
Sean: (Narrating) Wrong guy! He fires the sleazebag and after he fires him, Mr. Toomey does what any reasonable person does, taunting Norman Bates.
Warren Toomey: At least my customers have a good time. What'd yours get, Bates, huh? Dead, that's what they got! Dead! Murdered by you, you loony!
"Dude, are you nuts?! Don't taunt the guy! He was in the nuthouse for 22 years. You don't want to end up dead like the seven people he killed." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Norman heads to his house and finds Mary waiting for him. She calls her ex-boyfriend and she learns that he's already moved another woman in with him. Called it! Then, Norman offers Mary a sandwich and she finds a knife in the drawer, handing it to Norman. Oh, come on! Don't give any sharp objects to a guy who would use a sharp object on you.
"It's like handing Batman a gun and he doesn't even like guns. You just don't do it." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) The next day, we see that Norman is at work chopping some lettuce for Mr. Statler, and guess who arrives at the diner? It's Mr. Sleaze himself Mr. Toomey.
(A clip from The Langoliers is shown again)
Craig Toomey: You're one of them too, aren't you? A Langolier?
Sean: (Narrating) Again, wrong guy! We see that Warren Toomey enters the diner and then he proceeds to fuck with Norman.
Warren Toomey: (On Norman) Yeah, well, I hope he washes dishes better than he runs a motel.
Sean: (V/O as Norman Bates) This coming from a guy that allows drugs and sex at my motel. No if's, and's or but's but you're gonna die.
Sean: (Narrating) Then he proceeds to be rude to Mary and he keeps harassing her about Norman.
Warren Toomey: I'd like some of what Norman got last night./ What was it like?
Mary Samuels: What's what like?
Warren Toomey: Screwin' a psycho? (Snickering)
Mary Samuels: Would you mind removing your foot?
Warren Toomey: Hey, I suppose you didn't spend last night alone with him in that house, huh? You got strange tastes in men, honey.
Mary Samuels: Just because two people sleep under the same roof doesn't necessarily mean they've made love.
Warren Toomey: (Scoffing) Since when, huh? Or are you the kind that doesn't, uh, kiss and tell?
Mary Samuels: You really want to know what Norman's like?
Warren Toomey: Yeah.
Mary Samuels: Better than you'll ever be, fat boy.
"Ugh, can somebody kill this guy, please?" Sean pleaded while rubbing his temple.
Sean: (Narrating) But Norman's life into society appears to be going well, but all that's going to change when Norman gets a note… A note from beyond the grave… A note from "Mother".
(Norman picks up the note from "Mother" that says, "Don't let that little whore in my house again! Love, Mother". Norman runs out of the kitchen after reading the note)
Norman Bates: Cut it out, Toomey!
Mary Samuels: Norman?
Warren Toomey: Are you talkin' to me, whacko? Come on. Come on! Huh?
Sean: (V/O as mother) Come on, Jimmy. Let's go home.
Brian: (V/O as son) But mom, I almost got the high score on Ms. Pac-Man….
Sean: (V/O as mother) Fuck your high score! We're leaving!
(Norman looks over at the counter and looks at the knife, then looks at Toomey)
Warren Toomey: Oh. Oh, that's… That's beautiful. Go on, psycho, pick it up. Come on, pick it up! What's the matter, you lose your nerve, huh? Or do you only attack women, huh? Go on, pick it up! Show us what you're really like. Come… Come on, loony.
"What are ya, a serial killer? I'll fight ya. Anytime, anywhere. What are you gonna do, kill me?" Sean asked, imitating Warren Toomey.
Sean: (Narrating) After the drunk Toomey leaves, Norman tells Statler that there was a note that Toomey left on the wheel, but the note is gone and nobody believes him.
Norman Bates: I'm telling you, it was right there.
Ralph Statler: Sure it was.
Norman Bates: Don't humor me. I'm telling you there was a note on that wheel from my dead mother.
(A cuckoo noise is heard in the background)
Sean scoffs and rolled his eyes. "Right. If your dead mother sent you that note, then I'm Tommi Rose from I Am Frankie."
Sean: (Narrating) Later, Norman is at home enjoying a nice peanut butter sandwich and tea until Mary arrives to stay at his house because her friend's boyfriend is sleeping over. And she gives him some fudge as a gift. Mmm, fudge.
Norman Bates: Did you… Did you have dinner yet?
Mary Samuels: Yes. And I'm exhausted. I'm going to be right after I take a shower. If that's all right with you.
Norman Bates: Oh, oh, sure.
"Oh, go ahead. Take a shower. You had a long, exhausting day and you deserve to relax. It's not like a case of voyeuristic tendencies is gonna come creeping up Norman's ass." Sean chuckled.
Sean: (Narrating) And what do you know, voyeuristic tendencies came creeping up Norman's ass when he starts acting like a peeping tom just to see Mary naked. Dude, there's a little thing called the Internet and there's a site called Brazzers if you want to see hot chicks naked and use them for your wanking material. Anyway, Mary feels like that she's being watched, so she checks downstairs and finds Norman playing on the piano.
"Hmm, well I guess Norman is not up to his old tricks. Looks like there's hope for this guy." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Anyway, Norman finds an unexpected visitor at the motel honking their car horn, turns out it's that drunk sleazebag Mr. Toomey…
(A clip from The Langoliers is shown once more)
Craig Toomey: (Gets up after Albert hits him in the head with the toaster) I'M GOING TO BOSTON! I'M GOING TO BOSTON!
"Knock it off!" Sean yelled.
Sean: (Narrating) We see the drunk sleazebag, the unemployed Warren Toomey has returned to taunt Norman some more and move out of the motel, then this happens to Mr. Toomey when a figure in a black dress appears.
(Toomey looks up and sees a figure in a black dress standing in the room with a knife. The killer slashes Toomey in the face and stabs him to death)
"Dang, Dennis Franz took like 50 bullets from Detective Bullock in the pilot episode of NYPD Blue and he's still standing. In this one, he gets slashed in the face and stabbed to death. Boy, he sure did go out like a little bitch." Sean chuckled.
(A clip from NYPD Blue is shown)
Det. Andy Sipowicz (Played by Dennis Franz): Ipsa this, you pissy little bitch!
"Note to self, never piss off Dennis Franz." Sean said, with a scared look on his face.
Sean: (Narrating) The next day, we see that Norman is renovating the motel and his doctor arrives to talk to him about what's been going on at his job.
Dr. Bill Raymond: I got a call from Mr. Statler. He said you quit your job at the diner.
Norman Bates: Yeah. Well, I just figured I could make more money with the motel. You know, once I get… Once I get it back into condition that is.
Sean: (Narrating) Uh, do you think that it's a good idea for you to start renovating the motel and re-opening it after what happened 22 years ago? Don't you think that some shit might happen again?
"I'm not okay with this. In fact, let me ask Robert Loggia if that's okay. Is that okay, Robert Loggia?" Sean asked as he looks away from the camera.
(A clip from the Family Guy episode Brothers and Sisters is shown)
Robert Loggia: Not okay!
"Thank you. See? Even in spirit, Robert Loggia agrees with me." Sean said.
"Ugh, doesn't Norman know he's playing into someone's trap?" Brian asked.
Sean: (Narrating) After Mary and Dr. Raymond left, Norman is left alone as he continues to renovate the motel, until he hears a noise coming from his mother's room and sees someone standing in his mother's room.
(Norman sees someone in his mother's room)
Sean: (V/O as Norman) Mother? Mother, is that you? It has to be you.
Sean: (Narrating) So, Norman enters the house and goes to his mother's room, only to find it exactly as it was 22 years ago. Then he finds another note from "Mother" and hears a noise in the attic, only to find himself locked in. And while all that's going on, we find two teenagers named Kim and Josh. Kim is played by Jill Carroll from the 1988 horror film The Unholy and Josh is played by Tim Maier… who I've never heard of before. We see that Josh and Kim are sneaking in the Bates house through the cellar window doing what teens do.
"Okay, with this being the 1980s and the slasher film craze is going with Friday the 13th and Halloween. With the original being a psychological thriller from Hitchcock, this one is more slasher horror. We have some of the traits of the slasher film. We have two teenagers." Sean said.
(We see Josh and Kim sneaking in through the cellar window. And a check symbol is shown)
"We got that. Let's see here: teens smoking pot?" Sean asked.
(We see Josh lighting up a joint and another check symbol is shown)
"Okay, that's two. Now all that's left is that they're two horny teenagers having sex and we have the perfect slasher film." Sean said.
(Josh and Kim start making out. We see Josh unbuttoning Kim's shirt, then he slips his hand inside her blouse and touches her breast. Three check symbols is shown and a ringing noise and the sound of the alarm blaring is heard)
"We have breast touching! He's touching titties! That counts! We got a perfect slasher film. Review's over. 5 out of 5. I'm Sean the Mayhem Critic and I'll see you next time for Halloween Havoc." Sean said as he leaves the room before the credits roll and Jerry Goldsmith's music score from Psycho II starts playing.
(Record scratches)
Sean immediately returns to his seat and sits back down before continuing the review. "No! I'm not gonna do that to you. We've still got a lot of film left."
Sean: (Narrating) But Josh and Kim's private time is interrupted when they hear a noise coming from the other room. They go to check it out, only to see a female figure pacing in the room. They try to escape but they end up making some noise as the figure checks it out and she's armed with a knife. Kim escapes but Josh is not too lucky.
(The female figure stabs Josh to death as Kim escapes)
Sean: (V/O in a female voice) Stab. Stab. Stab. Stab. Stab. Stabbing you.
Sean: (Narrating) Meanwhile, Mary finds Norman in the attic and he tells her that somebody locked him in, thinking that it's someone pretending to be his mother. So, he takes her to his mother's bedroom, only to see that it's back to it's state of disuse.
Norman Bates: (Stammering) It was all fixed up. It wasn't like this. The… The note. This… The dresses are… (Checks the closet)
"Yeah, how long until Norman goes back to the nuthouse?" Sean asked.
Sean: (Narrating) Right when Norman is about to go cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs, the sheriff and the deputy arrive to speak to Norman. Sheriff Hunt, played by the late Hugh Gillin and Deputy Poole played by Chris Hendrie, speak to Norman about the girl's boyfriend who was murdered in the cellar.
Norman Bates: (Stammering) Well, what… what were they doing in the cellar, anyway?
Sheriff Hunt (Played by the late Hugh Gillin): Oh, what kids do today, I guess. Smoking dope, messin' around.
"That's what teenagers still do today!" Sean exclaimed.
Sean: (Narrating) Sheriff Hunt continues to question Norman and Mary about their whereabouts when the boy was murdered and Mary lies to the sheriff telling him that her and Norman were out walking together even though Norman was locked in the attic at that time.
Norman Bates: Why did you do that?
Mary Samuels: Do what?
Norman Bates: Lie to the Sheriff. You weren't with me this afternoon.
Mary Samuels: I had to do something. He was going to arrest you.
(Norman sighs and sits down in a chair)
Mary Samuels: Norman.
Norman Bates: It's starting again.
"Wasn't that the tagline for the movie?" Sean asked before the clip from the trailer is shown.
(The trailer for Psycho II is shown)
Announcer: Psycho II.
Norman Bates: It's starting again.
Sean: (Narrating) Back at the Sheriff's office, Lila goes to speak to Sheriff Hunt to warn him about Norman and she suspects that he's the one that murdered the boy.
Lila Loomis: It's all over town what he did to that boy.
Sheriff Hunt: Mrs. Loomis, I can't arrest a man without proof. Especially one with an alibi.
Sean: (V/O) Wait, wait, wait.
"Hold it. I neglected to mention some vital information about Lila Loomis nee Crane. Remember Sam Loomis from the first film? The guy who was dating Marion Crane. Well, apparently she married Sam Loomis. So, your sister gets stabbed to death by some guy with a mommy complex dressed in drag and you sleep with her boyfriend and marry him?" Sean asked, then starts to applaud. "Bravo! Bravo, lady. You have class. You marry your dead sister's boyfriend. It's just like saying that my best friend's brother died and him and his sister-in-law get together and they get married. No, you don't do that. That's not okay. Is that okay with you, Robert Loggia?"
(A clip from Family Guy is shown)
Robert Loggia: Not okay!
Sean: (Narrating) Later, back at the motel. We see that Mary is looking for some brandy in the motel while Norman is about to have a mental breakdown. She enters the motel only to come across…
(Mary turns on the light, only to be surprised by Lila)
Lila Loomis: Why did you lie to the Sheriff and say Bates was with you this afternoon?
Mary Samuels: Mother.
Sean was busy sipping on a bottle of Mike's Hard Black Cherry Lemonade, then he starts doing a spit take after finding out that Mary is the daughter of Lila Loomis. "What the hell? No, no, no, no, no, no. There's no way that Mary is related to that crazy old, dead sister's boyfriend marrying, big-mouthed lady. It can't be. I did not hear her call her "Mother". I'm going to keep sipping my Mike's Hard Lemonade and forget about it.
Sean takes a sip of his hard black cherry lemonade some more.
Lila Loomis: Why did you lie to the Sheriff and say Bates was with you this afternoon?
Mary Samuels: Mother.
Sean does another spit take after Mary calls Lila "Mother".
"Holy shit! She did! She called her "Mother"! She's related to her!" Sean yelled while pointing at the camera. "Vera Miles, you've lost your mind!"
Sean: (Narrating) So, Mary Samuels is Mary Loomis, the daughter of Lila and Sam Loomis. Turns out they're working together to drive Norman off the deep end and send him back into the nuthouse. They were the ones who have been making phone calls and sending notes to Norman. Hell, even Mary posed at the window dressed as Norman's mother, making him thinking that his mother is still alive. But because of Mary's growing friendship with Norman, she is convinced that Norman is no longer capable of killing. But her mother is not convinced and that he's back to his old ways.
Mary Loomis: Mother, he's innocent.
Lila Loomis: Innocent? He killed your aunt, didn't he? Not to mention the six other people.
Mary Loomis: Mother, that was 22 years ago.
Lila Loomis: Mary, people don't change.
"Unlike you." Sean scoffed. "And another thing, how the hell did they find out what his mother looked like, her handwriting and all?"
Sean: (Narrating) Back at the house, Norman is getting cleaned up in the bathroom and he's having a little trouble with a clogged toilet. Well, maybe flushing it would help…
(Norman flushes the toilet as it starts overflowing with blood, then we see blood oozing from the drain of the bathtub)
"Jesus! Talk about bad plumbing. Either that or the house is haunted." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Nope, it was just a bloody rag that Norman and Mary found in the toilet and Norman is horrified, only to believe that he killed the boy in the cellar but Mary says that he's innocent. As she sends Norman downstairs to fix themselves something to drink, Mary feels like that someone is watching her.
(Mary looks through the hole in Norma's room while Rockwell's Somebody's Watching Me starts playing, until we see an eye peeking at Mary and she starts screaming. Norman runs upstairs as Mary continues to scream)
"Well, she does have that horror movie scream like her Aunt Marian." Sean said, chuckling a bit.
Sean: (Narrating) Thinking that there's somebody in the house with them, Norman and Mary stay in the same room. Later that night, Norman and Mary are trapped in the room, Mary wakes up only to see Norman standing by her bedside with a knife and Norman starts to lose his mind.
Norman Bates: (While looking out the window) Mary.
Mary Loomis: Yes.
Norman Bates: I'm becoming confused again, aren't I?
Mary Loomis: Of course not.
(Norman turns to Mary and threatens to kill her)
Norman Bates: Don't lie to me. Not you.
Sean starts laughing. "I'm sorry but that was just over the top. I mean, every time I watch this scene, I start laughing at how over the top Anthony Perkins gets in this scene."
Sean: (Narrating) But it doesn't end there because it gets funnier and this is the whole scene and I hope I can keep this together. I hope people can keep this together when I mention this scene because it wasn't in the script. Anthony Perkins felt that his character and Mary needed some kind of intimate moment together so he has this written specifically for that moment. After Norman goes psycho on Mary, Norman fears that they might take him away again and then.
"Just… just watch. I'm gonna try and not laugh my head off from that scene. Play it." Sean said, taking a deep breath.
Mary Loomis: (Starts acting motherly to Norman and holds him) Don't worry, Norman. I won't.
Norman Bates: You smell good.
Mary Loomis: I do?
(Sean stifles a laugh)
Norman Bates: Yeah.
Mary Loomis: What do I smell like?
Norman Bates: You smell like, like the toasted cheese sandwiches…
(Sean struggles not to laugh)
Mary Loomis: What?
Norman Bates: …that my mother used to bring me when I was in bed with a temperature. She used to do lots of nice things for me before she went… Before she became…
Mary Loomis: Shh. Just remember the good things she did for you. Only the good things.
Norman Bates: I can't. They're not there anymore.
Mary Loomis: Of course they're there.
Norman Bates: No, the doctors took them all away. Along with everything else. Except, except those sandwiches.
We cut to Sean, who's now breaking down laughing from watching the scene.
"Oh, God bless Anthony Perkins. He just hams it in that scene. Except those sandwiches." Sean breaks down laughing again. "I'm sorry. Those sandwiches."
(A clip from Family Guy plays)
Robert Loggia: Eight fucking hours later.
Sean: (Narrating) The next morning, Dr. Raymond comes to visit Norman and gives him some info on Mary and telling her that Mary is the daughter of Lila Loomis and that they're the ones that were leaving the notes and making the phone calls. And it looks like Norman needs to snap back into reality because Norman is telling him that he saw his mother. Back with Mary, we see her confronting Lila to tell her to stop calling Norman. You know, I think their plan is gonna backfire. Oh, and Dr. Raymond has the body of Norma Bates exhumed to prove to Norman that his mother is dead and that she's never coming back to life. Then, Norman confronts Mary with what Dr. Raymond told him. And the phone rings as Norman gets a phone call from his Mother. Oh, for Christ's sake, it's not your mother! How many times are they going to tell you that it's not your mother?
"Can somebody please send him to the nuthouse?" Sean asked.
Sean: (Narrating) But hey, it gets crazier when Norman claims that he's been getting calls from his real mother.
"Trust me, it's an even longer story at the end. It's difficult for me to believe something like this." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) Anyway, Dr. Raymond follows Lila to the Bates Motel and tracks her down at the house so she can continue her plan to drive Norman insane by heading down to the basement to pick up her "Mother" costume and then we get one of the most satisfying deaths ever.
(While retrieving her "Mother" outfit, Lila turns around and looks up, only to see a shadowy figure armed with a knife walking towards her)
(A clip from Alfred Hitchcock's Psycho is shown. The scene where Lila finds the body of Norma Bates and she starts screaming is shown. We cut back to Psycho II as Lila screams. The figure murders Lila by plunging the knife into her mouth. We see the tip of the blade going through her skull and comes out the back of her head)
"Well, I guess Lila Loomis… have said a mouthful." Sean said, putting on his sunglasses as he imitates David Caruso from CSI: Miami.
(The theme from CSI: Miami and part of the show's opening starts playing)
Sean: (Narrating) After that satisfying yet gruesome demise of Vera Miles' character, we see that the police are at the swamp and they find a car with Toomey's corpse inside. Then, Mary runs to tell Norman that they found a car and convince him to flee. And then, we see that Norman has finally lost it when he starts speaking to "Mother".
Norman Bates: No, Mother. Mary's still here with me. I like her. No. No, of course not. Not as much as you. No, I… I won't do that. You can't make me kill her.
"Well, somehow Lila's plan worked. Norman is going crazy." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) While hearing Norman talking to "Mother" about whether or not he should kill her, Mary heads down to the cellar to put on the Mother costume to get Norman off of the phone. But that fails miserably when Lila and Mary's plan backfires.
Dr. Bill Raymond: (Grabs Mary from behind) Gotcha.
(Mary screams and stabs Dr. Raymond in the heart. He falls over the banister to his death. The knife plunges deeper into Dr. Raymond's chest after the handle of the knife makes contact with the banister)
"Aw, shit! All that Robert Loggia wanted to do was to tell Mary about Minute Maid orange tangerine juice with calcium. Babe, that was not okay!" Sean yelled out.
Sean: (Narrating) So after Mary freaks out and kills the wrong guy, Norman sees Mary dressed as "Mother" right when his sanity snaps.
Norman Bates: And I'll cover up for you. Now give me the knife.
Mary Loomis: Stay away.
(She stabs Norman's hand)
Norman Bates: I always have, because I'm your dutiful son.
Mary Loomis: Stay away.
(She stabs Norman's other hand)
Norman Bates: And you're my loving mother. So, please give me the knife.
(Norman grabs the blade as Mary pulls it away, wounding him some more.
Norman Bates: It's time to go to the fruit cellar now, Mother.
"Okay, I don't know which one is psycho: either Norman or Mary. I mean, look at her. She's trying to kill Norman with a knife after she murdered his doctor while she was dressed as his mother." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) With the two of them in the fruit cellars, Norman knocks over some charcoal and he comes across Lila's corpse. Then Mary tells Norman that he killed them all and she tries to kill him, but not until the cops shot her. So, yeah. Lila and Mary's plan fucking sucked. Anyway, Norman survives. Mary and Lila are dead and Norman has regained his sanity.
"Well, I guess that's all for Psycho II. Now, here's what I think of…." Sean said.
(A shadowy figure walks up to the Bates house)
"Oh, crap. I hope I'm not losing it but it looks like that Norman's mother is still alive." Sean said.
Sean: (Narrating) No, actually it's the sweet old lady Emma Spool, the co-owner of Statler's Diner. She comes by to visit Norman to check on him to see how he's doing and then she drops a little bombshell about Norman's real mother.
Norman Bates: So, are you really my mother?
Emma Spool: The name Spool doesn't mean anything to you?
Norman Bates: No. Should it?
Emma Spool: It was Norma Bates' maiden name. The woman you thought was your mother was my sister. I had you when I was very young out of wedlock. I couldn't handle a brand-new baby, especially, uh, being by myself. I… I had some trouble and the State put me away for a while.
"Okay, wait a minute. So, Norma Bates a.k.a. Norma Spool, the sister of Emma Spool, is not Norman's real mother and this sweet old lady Emma Spool is Norman's real mother and she had him out of wedlock and the State put her in the nuthouse. And get this, Emma Spool was the one who committed those murders to anyone who would harm her son." Sean said before taking a deep breath. "Uh, did I stumble onto soap opera plot territory here? Is this some kind of rushed plot twist here? Look, the original Psycho had the greatest plot twist ever. In this one, it's like what the hell were they thinking."
Sean: (Narrating) So, after Emma Spool reveals to Norman that she's his real mother. Ugh, I'm glad they scrapped that one in Psycho IV: The Beginning. Well, looks like Norman took the news pretty….
(Norman picks up the shovel and strikes Emma in the head with it, killing her)
Sean starts breaking down in laughter. "Oh, my God! That's one of the most hilarious death scenes I've ever seen in the movie. First, we have Vera Miles' gruesome yet satisfying death scene and now we have this sweet old lady getting bashed in the head with a fucking shovel by Norman Bates and when he hit her, the chair breaks and he starts whistling. If only, I can make this more hilariously inappropriate. I got it."
(Norman hits Emma in the head with the shovel to the tune of the Super Mario Bros. theme)
"Oh, man. I'm going to Hell." Sean laughs.
Sean: (Narrating) Norman pretends that Emma Spool is Norma Bates and carries her to Mother's room and we see that he's back to his old tricks once more.
Mother's Voice: I'm not sleepy. Put me in my chair.
Norman Bates: Yes, Mother.
Mother's Voice: And now, turn me to the window. I want to keep my eyes on you. Make sure you don't start playing with filthy girls again.
"And I don't want you on your laptop looking at those filthy sluts on that Brazzers site." Sean said, imitating Mother.
Sean: (Narrating) With the motel back in business, the film ends with one of the most all-time concluding shots that's poster worthy. The image of Norman Bates observing his surroundings while 'Mother' is seen looking down from her bedroom window with a dark cloud rolling by in the sky complimented with Jerry Goldsmith's eerie music score. A classic image that will be used on VHS covers, DVD and Blu-Ray covers. Roll credits, the end.
"And that was Psycho II and I enjoyed it." Sean said.
(Footage from the film is shown)
Sean: (Narrating) As much as I like the original film, I find it to better than the original. Although, there was a sequel to the book called Psycho II by Robert Bloch before the script for this one was made. It was pretty confusing. The movie does an excellent job delivering shocking thrills and a great storyline. The cinematography was pretty good. I would just like to note that Dean Cundey, the movie's cinematographer who worked on a few of John Carpenter's films like Halloween, Escape from New York, Halloween II, Halloween III: Season of the Witch, the Back to the Future trilogy and Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, did a great job on this film. Now, let's talk about the acting. The late Anthony Perkins is amazing as always as Norman Bates. Originally, he had no intention of doing a sequel and believe it or not, originally Christopher Walken was supposed to play Norman Bates but eventually Anthony Perkins returned and thank god he did. The supporting characters are also memorable as well. Meg Tilly has a great chemistry with Perkins and Vera Miles' performance was good even though I don't like with what they did to her character. And let's talk about Jerry Goldsmith's music score, it's amazing as always. It's haunting, dramatic and suspenseful and probably one of my favorites from Goldsmith, when you get a chance give it a listen. Yeah, it's one of the best sequels ever and when you come across this little gem, give it a watch. And yes, there's Psycho III and Psycho IV: The Beginning. But I'll talk about them later. That's why I'm giving Psycho II 4 knives out of 5.
"Well, that's one film down and a few others to go. And Halloween Havoc is still on the way. I'm Sean the Mayhem Critic and I'll see you guys next time." Sean said before getting up from off of his chair and leaves the living room.
Mayhem Critic Tagline – It's starting again.
And that was The Mayhem Critic's review of Psycho II. I hope that you all like my review of the movie. Next time on The Mayhem Critic, Halloween Havoc continues when Sean takes a look at the 1984 supernatural comedy Ghostbusters. Don't forget to review this story, add this to your favorites and follow it for future updates. I'll see you guys next time for the next chapter of The Mayhem Critic. Till next time, my fellow readers.