The Gospel of Emily - (Hazbin Hotel, OC!MC)

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There was a time where I was forced to go to Church every Sunday.

It was a family tradition that lasted roughly eleven years, and then it slowly faded away when the church in town was hit by a scandal- the priest had been seen trying to lure some kids.

The sound beating given by the parents of said kids to the guilty preacher pretty much shattered any sort of respect the catholic families had for the place.

Mom was someone that was pious, quite kind, but always so strict about religious habits. She followed the rest to slowly 'phase out' of visiting the church on a weekly basis, preferring to pray from home or... anywhere but near that 'tainted place'.

And while I wouldn't say she was truly in the wrong for some of her decisions, I would say she could be overbearing at times.

So, while I grew up in a fairly Christian household, I hardly preserved any of the prayers and habits mom tried to burn in my brain.

I just found a job, moved out of the house, and I kind of stopped caring for religion as a way of 'faith' and more as one of philosophy. Morality was something fascinating and something that had been prominent during my studies in highschool - a time where 'kids' like me were subjected to the idea of doing drugs or having sex.

Admittedly, I had tried both but while some would blame societal pressure from 'my peers', I just gave it a try. Heck, I didn't even go on dates to get laid as I knew that would betray the main goal of my interest in sexuality and ultimately hurt someone.

The girl that took my first time wasn't even around anymore, having moved East and constantly bragging of her trips to Europe on her social media.

Meanwhile I had adopted a more 'settled' attitude and hardly took vacations out of town. Home was home, it wasn't much but it wasn't like I was planning to spend all my hard-earned money in frivolous holidays.

I had resolved to spend roughly five to six years working hard, getting either a promotion (difficult) or a raise (even more difficult), and then ultimately plan a way to get a family started.

All in all, Christianity as a philosophy could be a good way to keep my head fixed on my general plan: there were various strands of Christianity, there were various perspective within each variant. And I had books and books about those, keeping me enlightened that, despite what many would expect, the way that these books were written and were given legitimacy allowed for many freedoms due to how open to interpretation the Bible was.

Thus I spent my Sundays, roughly after lunchtime, re-reading some of those books and checking for new views on each of their lines. It was a seemingly-boring way to spend part of my weekend, but it was surprisingly pleasant to go through.

...

Still, nothing had prepared me to a particularly Sunday morning as I was resting, blissfully unaware that my monotonous life was soon to come to an end.

First came a knock at the front door. A bit of a foolish first step considering that rarely people slept nearby that area of their home. Then the door-bell rang a few times and I ultimately got forced by the noise to check what was going on. I didn't even change from my sleepwear, I had my half-sleeved blue shirt and shorts on when I opened the door and-

"Good morning, good sir. May I tell you about the joys of the Lord?"

The joyous loud voice, the bright light coming from behind the young man now standing in front of me and... the fact the woman hardly looked much human. Gray skin, angelic wings, an halo over her head- a general air of 'divinity' to her.

Still, while many would have been baffled by such sight and questioned many things, I was still tired and I had a single big question to ask back.

"Do you know that is four in the morning?"

The angel girl opened her mouth, then paused and looked a tiny bit nervous. "I-Is it too early? Gosh, I am so sorry! I am not used to visit mortals but... I am Emily, by the way."

"Duncan," I grumbled and I saw smile again. "Still, what did you say you wanted? The Gospel of the Lord and all of that?"

"Yes, I-"

"I read books on Christianity, I am fine with what I know," I rebuked flatly, causing Emily to pause, frown again and then smile again.

"Truly! Will you go to Church today?"

"Nope."

Her smile fell, and a confused look flashed on her face. I want to say she was faking all of that, but no- this angel was being outright open with her expressions that I could tell on the spot what was going on inside her head.

"Wh-Why not?"

"Stuff that you don't know and I don't see a point in bringing up, miss. So... are we done?"

"O-Of course not! I have to help you find your way back to the faith! The Lord is a good God and you can't just leave him-"

"I didn't," I flatly rebuked, glaring this time as Emily looked taken aback. "What tells you that I have to go to Church to be one with God? Should it not be prayers that connect humans to their deity? Or are you perhaps assuring that there is legitimacy in the notion that priests and bishops are 'chosen' by God and thus worthy of His trust?"

"N-No, that's not... I mean, God supports the Church but-"

"But is it wrong to assume that the Church is inherently the proper representation of God's will upon His believers?"

"I wouldn't go as far but... it is the house of God!" Emily whined back, causing me to roll my eyes at that and for her to look confused. "What?"

"The notion of 'House of God' applies to the fact that a Church is born to be a source of divine respect towards the rules of God. Would this be my House if my own rules are not respected? If not, then how would the Church be deigned as God's own House if the rules He professed are not respected by all?"

My words seemed to leave the angel hesitant once again, but I took this opportunity to put an end to this conversation.

"Look, Emily. Word of advice," I muttered as I saw the angel perk up at my words, gripping at my door handle as I didn't intend to get surprised as I stopped this talk at once. "Before you engage in whatever you are doing, you probably should look on the literature on the matter. If not whatever is available in heaven, then what is available on religious thoughts on Earth. With that being said, I am going back to bed. Good bye."

I closed the door, and I was glad that she didn't stick around to nag me more.

I thought I had done the impossible: I had beaten an angel, a faithful servant of God, in a simple theological battle. It was quite the tale to have with me, but I doubted anyone would believe it. Hell, I doubted I would have believed it myself after that Sunday, but...

I was soon to learn I may have started a bit of a feud with an angel that really really wants to get me to go back to Church.

AN

Duncan's Pragmatism vs. Emily's Idealism. A match of the century! Also, this is set after S1 of HH and... Emily has been assigned away from the Hell situation by Sera with the promise that Sera will help Sir Pentious now that he is in Heaven. That being said, Sera's plan to keep Emily away from Charlie and Co. may have pushed her into getting in an even more troublesome spot as Emily will now look into the 'literature' and will start to grow a bit of a religious backbone by debating Duncan and...

Well, there will be loods.