5th of Sun's Dusk
We found the mage out on the ice pack. There's a boy in town that hauls food part way to his hidey hole that gave us good directions. It's been two days of freezing cold, driving wind, snow, and bears while we check every crack and crevice we can find. His little dug out is snug enough but he's sending us off to some Dwermer ruin. We've got to get through the whole Dwermer ruin all the way to the bottom and down below it into a big cavern so that we can locate some transcription device. The mad mage seems to think that the exact scroll I need is there. I'm willing to give it a shot. It's been the best lead that I've had so far. We're off in the morning after we stop and pick up some provisions.
6th of Sun's Dusk
We found the ruin after most of a day of searching. It's dark and we're all tired from walking in the driving wind. We're camping inside where the wind isn't so bad. Metal armor and a cold stone floor make for poor sleep. I woke up this morning to find that I'm mostly laying on top of the pup. Jenassa seems amused and Rayya just shakes her head. We're all in armor but I will say it was nice not to be cold and stiff. Eric looks at me and smiles, "Are you warmer now? You seemed cold last night, so I was trying to keep you warm." Damn it, pup, that right there is a thousand times better than all the candy put together. No time for this right now. Best to stay focused so I can make sure we get back out of here to deal this properly, We're making a run through this place as fast as we can go. Hang on, Kodlak. I'm coming. We'll go as deep into this mess as we get before we're too tired to go on.
7th of Sun's Dusk
It's hard to tell if it's the 7th or maybe later. I've slept and woken up, which now the definition of a day, regardless of how many hours may or may not have passed. I've been fighting dwarven machines and Falmer until my shoulders ache from holding my sword and shield. I can barely swing my sword. Jenassa is out of spells and has to sleep to replenish them. Rayya is just as exhausted. I can tell the pup is maybe even more tired than the rest of us but he's here, shoving stone benches to block the door so that we can all get some rest. We found a closet we can block off so we should be safe enough to sleep, if a bit cramped
8th of Sun's Dusk
I'm calling this the 8th because this far underground it's impossible to tell what time it is. You forget how much you depend on the sun. I think I drooled on the pup last night which he took with good humor. Maybe the twins are right about him. He does seem to be getting his footing in this new life. I have the scroll now. It took quite a bit of fiddling with that dwermer contraption to get to it once we finally found the thing. I don't have it in me right now to go deal with the mad mage again.
Unless I miss my guess, Alduin will show up as soon as I get to the Throat of the World with this elder scroll. If it's that intertwined, I think he'll be able to sense it when I get there with it. I'm headed back to Lakeview for some rest, a hot bath, a hot meal, and a long talk with the pup. I owe him some explanations and a bit more respect. He's been really solid, dependable and just nice to have around on this run through these ruins. Any man willing to follow me through that nightmare might just have enough stuffing to handle the rest of my life. I quit counting the Falmer when my count topped forty. We've leveled some Centurions, lots of Spheres, tons of spiders, bandits, and even a dragon. Throw in some of the local wildlife like Chaurus and it's been a mad dash to get a scroll.
12th of Sun's Dusk
We were underground longer than I thought. No wonder we're all starving. Lydia made stew. Bless her. It wasn't burnt this time but I wish she'd hire a cook, not just a bard. Even so I almost face planted in the bowl. Bath and then sleep. I'll try to write more later.
13th of Sun's Dusk
Picking up where I left off. It's nice having music here and I've paid the bard a bit extra to start schooling the girls. I refuse to raise ignorant louts of either gender in this house.
Eric and I had a long talk this morning when we woke up. He's quite happy with my life. He actually enjoys the insanity of it. I explained about Kodlak and Hircine and Alduin. Eric didn't flinch a bit when I told him I'd been a werewolf. Instead he hugged me and… it was nice. I think I might have found my strong shoulder to lean on. I've told him the rest of my plan. He knows that the Thalmor are dangerous but he's still game for it… All of it, particularly since it means we'll have to go to Hammerfell. He's never seen a desert and can't imagine anywhere being that hot. We'll go once the civil war here is sorted out. Skyrim will need allies once the war is over.
Once I'm done saving Kodlak again, which I shall remind him about when I see him again, I'll have to figure out what to do about this war. I feel the need to sit down with Balgruuf and the Circle to sort out how having the Harbinger fighting in a war is going to work. Or even if it will work. Since it's part of a larger war against the Elves I think Ysgramor himself might approve. I'd sit back and let them fight it out on their own but I need both the Empire and Skyrim to be as strong as we can make them if we're going to send the Altmer to join the Dwermer. We'll need every soldier I can save when our feet touch soil in Summerset.
God's help me but I think I'm leaning towards supporting the bearded monkey. I won't decide until I've spoken with Balgruuf and the Circle. I want to know what's between him and Ulfric. That might help me decide. I've seen Elisf, and Falk is still the one running things in Solitude. She's a figurehead, no more. Falk's competent enough to keep a scarecrow on the Jarl's throne but we need more than that to bind Skyrim back together. Elisf seems too prone to emotional outbursts. That's not what's needed right now. We need someone who's calm no matter what and nothing flusters them. If Ralof and Hadvar are any indication, a lot of this bitterness already runs too deep to be easily dealt with. The two of them grew up together, fast friends, until Hadvar left to join the Legion. Now Hadvar is back here, Ralof is a Storm Cloak and they hate each other.
14th of Sun's Dusk
We're off to the Throat of the World. Assuming that we make it back, I'll write a bit more later. I need to go make sure all the enchantments are full power, the potions are ready, and Jenassa has her spells ready.
Well, I'm still writing so we survived the battle with Alduin. I've learned DragonRend. I've learned a couple of other things too. I can put a beat down on that dragon. I haven't managed to kill him yet, but I'm getting closer to being able to do it. I've thrown him off his stride. He's off hiding in Sovengard, licking his wounds. A couple of dozen dragons showed up after the battle and they're flying now in the ancient dance, celebrating my victory as if I were truly a dovah. Paarthurnax is curious about my journal. I told him that I'm keeping records for the next Harbinger. Kodlak did it as did many of my predecessors in this position. I don't have them to talk things over with but their journals help and perhaps mine will help someone else.
I just hope Balgruuf doesn't laugh me out of the palace. I have the most insane favor to ask. Would you mind terribly if I use your castle to trap a dragon? That might be enough to make Hrongar spit his mead. That's not going to be an easy thing to ask for. I don't expect that he'll agree while he's still tap dancing between Ulfric and Tullius. It's too much of a distraction and makes it too likely that either or both might attack Whiterun while I'm trying to wrangle a dragon. I need one that can tell me where Alduin has his portal into Sovengarde so I can bring him bay there. While I think the Merry Band, Eric included, would be willing to follow me there, I don't know that they'll be able to nor do I think I'd want to ask them to do it. Even if I do manage to get there, I don't exactly have return passage booked. Portals aren't like doors. Many will let you in. Not all will let you out again. This might well be a one-way trip. With that in mind, I need to settle some things before I do this. I need to name a successor, set up a trust for the girls, leave Eric the house. I also need to settle some things between the two of us.
15th of Sun's Dusk
At least Balgruuf didn't laugh too hard. I feel like I should get bonus points for making Hrongir spit mead and Proventus almost faint. Farengar was dancing around with glee at finally getting to see one up close. All I have to go now is get both sides of a fairly nasty civil war to agree to stop fighting long enough for me to do what I need to do. Trap a dragon, make it tell me how to get to Alduin and then finish that big black beast off.
The first order of business, before I go and accost Tullius or Ulfric is head to the Temple of Mara. After some serious discussion, Eric and I have decided that if this indeed a one-way ticket, he'll take care of the girls until I can find a way back. He seems certain that I will. His faith in that is… calming. It's that kind of steadiness I've hoping for in a partner. The easiest way to handle everything in such a short time is for the two of us to get married. It won't be much of a honeymoon but I've got enough stuff made up that he can open up an arms business that should run for years. The only way to get better at smithing is to do it so there's tons of weapons and armor stockpiled in the basement.
Lydia and Rayya have agreed to stay on just in case the Thalmor come poking around. Jenassa says I have six months before she comes looking for me. I've got a letter to leave with Vilkas. I'm naming him as my successor as Harbinger until he finds a worthier candidate for the office. I know he doesn't really want it. I'll tell him that if I make it back, he can burn the letter. If I don't, he should open it and read it. If he promises me, he'll do it.
16th of Sun's Dusk
Wedding is tomorrow so I've got some time to do a bit of shopping and invite some people. I don't know that I want to get married in my armor. I think this occasion deserves something a bit more romantic.
18th of Sun's Dusk
It was a simple affair. Mostly it was Eric's family and the Companions who came. I keep looking at this ring and I can feel my ears get pink. I hope we weren't too loud last night. I think we were because we got a lot of smirks and looks when we left but Eric seems pleased with himself. Eric said he meant for me to have a night that would bring me back to him. Vilkas laughed when I said that I finally saw what he and Farkas had seen in the pup. "Yah… He's finally grown into his paws."
Arngeir isn't happy about this peace conference but apparently Paarthurnax told him to do or give me what ever it is that I want. He's not happy but he's doing it. I rather expect I'll have to hear him complain about it later.
Tullius went better than I expected. I half expected him to try to send me to the headsman again. I think he wanted too but didn't want to risk the wrath of the Companions. He's agreed to attend. He's less arrogant than Ulfric but his hands kept straying toward his sword the whole time. He's lucky I didn't skewer him. His twitchy sword hand nearly made me reach for mine but as Vilkas is fond of reminding me "Eyes on the prey not the horizon" so I made it out of there without an incident. He's a twitchy little man and I didn't like him much. Rikke was there too, and she got a glare from me the instant she tried to open her mouth. I don't much care what she has to say. There must have been something in my look because she snapped her jaw shut and left the room. I'll get to deal with her one of these days. This squeaky weasel might be a military genius, but he should avoid card games. He's got more tells than the town crier. He's scared and I think I scare him even more. Not without good reason. I'll see your Legion and raise you some Companions and my Merry Band.
I have to head back to Jorrvaskr to pick up the armor I had Eorlund make for me. Maybe if I look the part those two will realize who they're dealing with. I'm not quite the same ragged vagabond he rode in the cart with anymore. I have a new family now – close and extended. I have found my voice both literally and figuratively. I'm no ones fool or pawn. Once I look the part, we're off to see the bearded monkeys. He and Galmar had best both be more polite this time or there may well be a brawl. I haven't punched a Jarl yet and if I'm honest I'm rather looking forward to it. Ulfric's bigger and probably stronger but I'm faster and meaner. Let him try to shout at me like he did to Torryg.