Unchangeable Chapter 8: Destruction, a naruto fanfic

A/N: Welcome to the longest chapter in this story! I don't know why it's so long and even longer than the last chapter which is only the second longest one. But chapter 8 is certainly an important piece. I think I'm really running out of ideas about what to say next TvT Do you think author's note is annoying like a commercial break? I guess maybe yes? I'll still include author's note here anyway because it seems pretty fun:D

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, but Aeko is mine, yayy

12:30. May 5th

He came again, only to discover that she had gotten into the habit of wearing ninja clothes to sleep again. But she had yet to sleep - Kurotsuchi was sitting on her bed dreamily staring at the window.

"Oh gosh, it has been a tiring day. Can I borrow your lap for a moment?" He yawned, climbing out from the already opened window and into her room.

"Pardon?"

"Yes, I can - I know you will let me, anyway." He nonchalantly slid onto the bed where she was sitting, and placed his head safely on her lap.

"What the fuck?"

"I find this more comfortable than your pillow."

She purposefully sighed with heaviness, gently touching his face. But before Deidara was even able to feel her touch she had pulled it with the most brutal force she could muster. "No, no, no you're destroying my handsome features! Stop!" She was still pulling his face aggressively while he tried to take her hands off yet without success. "You have nothing such as 'handsome features', Deidara-nii. You look ugly.", "Nooooo, I think you're pretty, and this kind of thinking has to be mutual!" The blond groaned in pain. "It is mutual. I do think I'm pretty."

"You're deliberately…"

"Yes, it is deliberate." She finally stopped tormenting the blond after a while with him begging and moaning.

He rolled his eyes and rolled himself out of this dangerous woman. "At first I was very tired and I thought you would be willing to take care of me or pamper me a bit or something like that, yeah. But you-" She covered her mouth to suppress her laughter. "Me? Pampering you? HAHAHAHAHA YOU MUST HAVE BEEN DRIVEN INSANE BY THAT CRAZY ORGANIZATION HAHAHAHAHA!" The image was so ridiculous she couldn't help cackling to tears.

He frowned, "But don't you remember anything?". The black-haired asked back, sounding innocuous enough, "Remember what? Today is a normal day. Probably an unlucky one because you visit me."

"Nooo, you cannot forget it's my birthday, un – you must have been pretending! But even if you do, I've reminded you of that. At least you have to give me something like a present!" He whined. "I'm not sure if I can offer you anything at all but what do you want?" She raised an eyebrow.

"You."

Kurotsuchi laughed as she replied to him, "I mean, yeah I ask things you like not to give you that. I ask for fun only. Haha I'll never be yours, you fool."

"One day you will eventually become mine without you giving yourself to me as a birthday present. Let's see who's the fool then." He frowned. "There's no 'one day' here. You're so funny." She challenged him.

He rolled onto her lap again and looked out into the sky from the window. Previously, she had looked in this direction, too. He realised that was the way he usually flew with his bird. She had watched. Perhaps she had waited. Or simply had looked and reminisced. Deidara smirked at his small discovery and continued to enjoy her warmth.

"What has happened here?" Kurotsuchi gasped as she had to constantly use her ability to find and rescue people from the designated area.

She was overwhelmed by the devastated scene in front of her eyes. Most of the inhabitants in that town were wounded, including children and senior citizens. Many had lost their lives, but more had lost their loved ones' lives. As the kunoichi briskly walked on the awfully destroyed street, she could see the shock and terror in the residents' eyes, she could hear woeful sobs everywhere. She saw blood, ruins and destruction. And she heard a plaintive, choked voice of an old man - he talked to a shinobi who seemed to be reporting the events that happened.

"A-A businessman w-wanted to build a f-factory here…"

"Calm down please, just tell me what happened."

"I'm trying but I cannot!" Tears streamed down the elderly's face. He wept, "I've lost my son and one of my grandchildren. How could you understand how much I'm suffering?" The young man immediately realised his mistake in being too hasty and in turn put a hand on the other man's shoulders in silence to show empathy.

"I couldn't see my beloved, endearing son again. I likewise couldn't hear the very loving, familiar voice of my grandchild. I couldn't pat their heads. I couldn't tell them stories. I couldn't watch them grow and succeed in their own path anymore." He wept and wept in agony.

"I understand, but I need you to offer me information so we can support not only your family but your neighbours and the whole town as well."

"Okay," he tried to regain his composure, "the businessman wanted to build a f-factory here next to the river to m-make things more convenient."

"So that means…"

"Yes, they would discharge c-chemical waste directly to one of our town's main sources of water. Of course, as citizens of this place since birth, our river being p-polluted was the last thing we wanted to w-witness."

The younger wrote something onto his note.

"And then?"

"We had mounted countless demonstrations in front of the office of this delirious guy despite his promises of a prodigal amount of money. He said he had to e-execute that project at all costs because their products were in very high demand but most of us refused to give up. Our dramatically negative reactions had clearly irritated that evil. After then, he hired t-terrorists to quell our most recent demonstration which is also the most intense..."

Much to Kurotsuchi's disappointment, unfortunately, because she was in a rush, she couldn't stay there for too long just due to her curiosity. She had to leave.

On her way to the rescuing centre, trees and houses were obliterated massively. Kurotsuchi had a very, very queasy feeling about the way they were destroyed.

"Mom, I'm scared. They were MONSTERS!" A child cried. "I don't think they've completely gone, mom. Even when things seem to be okay now. Dad… Where's dad?"

"He was still safe and sound," Her mother patted her on the back. "… in the hospital, I'll bring you to visit him when everything has calmed down. Also, don't worry, honey. The monsters have completely gone. They'll never come back. The evil has been arrested."

"You mean the businessman?"

"Yes."

"But the terrorists?"

"No one would be here to hire them again. By the way, you're hungry, aren't you?" The black-haired cut in as she offered them some food. "Thanks" The young girl received them with both hands gratefully and turned back to her mom. "They haven't completely gone. Mom, you have to believe me!"

"So where are they?"

"I can see they lurk behind the debris. They hide under the shadow. They lay beneath every centimetre of ground my shoes step on. Mom, they frighten me and haunt me in my nightmares!"

Kurotsuchi sighed and answered the child again, "I think only the latter seems like the truth. Yeah, don't worry, everything will be fine." As the child's voice did nothing but set her teeth on edge, she decided she must do something to make that little girl voluntarily keep quiet. "Now forget all that and eat something, you look like you've been starving for ages – you look way too thin, yeah kinda undernourished and you have to eat a lot more in order to grow up." The kunoichi stroked her hair.

"Oh… yes, kunoichi-san. You're probably right, I've felt ravenous all along."

Her lips pressed tightly in a moment of epiphany, 'Gosh so that's how dad tricked me into stopping my happy speech during family meals when I'm young? It's so effective I have not realised it until now!'. The mother looked at Kurotsuchi thankfully, "Sorry, my daughter has always been talkative like that. It must have disturbed you and the quiet atmosphere here" She smiled back and rolled her eyes, "No problem, miss. My father and grandfather both confirmed I'm talkative, too" The woman chuckled. However, a bizarre feeling of unease had been nagging at her all along, yet it was until now that she suddenly remembered the thing with which she had been so preoccupied.

"Oh, and I have this one question,"

As she walked and walked, observing the ruins caused and the remains left, her intuition spurred her onto something she didn't even know herself. But not long later, her heart couldn't help sinking after her brain finally reached a conclusion.

The patchy holes laying around. Trees burnt to ashes. Houses collapsing to dust. The ground shattered in an outrageous way. Given all her knowledge, experience and unforgettable memories etched deeply on every cell of her brain, that kind of damage…

She stumbled and fell.

"… was caused by crazy explosions."

"And I know this might conjure up considerable unpleasant feelings for you, but I will ask only this one more time - do you remember what the terrorists look like?" The woman turned to look at her daughter, and Kurotsuchi didn't bother to simulate surprise at her answer. "I cannot remember clearly, but there were two people who primarily wreaked havoc on this place. One is blond and the other, I'm not sure if he's human as such – he was a weird creature that looked like a human, but he had a metal tail. I can recall seeing the blond who had long hair dropping something from up high and-"

"Enough for me to understand. Thank you."

"Think nothing of it. It's good I can help you guys with any bit of things I know." The mother smiled weakly.

Surely, her queasy feelings have not been ill-founded.

How could she not believe it? As the black- haired continued to walk on the forlorn street, she wondered why gusts of wind in August always felt so cold.

September 6th again.

"Happy birthday again, Kurotsuchi." Naime quietly held her hand while everyone was eating. "I know you're still upset about that. To be honest, I was shocked just as you did when I found out about the story. But it's your seventeenth birthday today. At least on this very day only, you need to forget it a little bit, not for anyone but for yourself. For me also, if you want."

She replied tiredly, "What are you talking about? Why are you saying weird things on my happy day? Forget what?"

"You don't look genuinely happy." The brown-haired muttered. While others were too focused on the food, the girl perceptively noticed the subtle sadness hidden somewhere in her friend's eyes. She felt duty-bound to say something, even if it sounded quite personal. "I'm talking about the thing that has been festering you for like the whole month. If you don't believe me, ask Akatsuchi – even he can see that."

She rested her chin on her one hand, blinking. "I can never lie to you, Naime. Yeah, actually not that I'm bad at acting – I'm not even in the mood to." The other girl smiled. "True enough, but you look even worse on your birthday than on normal days. What's the matter?"

'He will come. Tonight.' She sighed, "His absence, it is… conspicuous." Naime patted her on the back, commiserating with her best friend, "Yeah, Deidara has always been noisy and obtrusive during parties. The atmosphere when he isn't here seems pretty unfamiliar. Oops, I mean not that I want him to be present here-"

They were having dinner in her favourite restaurant and she couldn't help staring at the chair on which Kaoto was sitting. 'It used to be Deidara's seat.' Kurotsuchi nodded in agreement with the brown-haired's words and yet for another time, she wondered how come the food in her mouth tasted so bitter.

1:30. She didn't close her window.

"Hi." He came in, "Thanks for welcoming me. Happy birthday, by the way. Oh, are you sleeping, hmmm?" The black-haired was curling in her blanket and seemed not to move at all. Deidara didn't think much and put a hand on her body. "You're too tired after your birthday party to wait up for me?"

"DON'T TOUCH ME AT ALL!"

He was startled and withdrew his hand quickly on instinct. "What? You're awake, Kurotsuchi. And you've scared me, too. What are you saying?" She still had her back against him, repeating her words, "I say don't you ever touch me again!" The atypical rancour and asperity in her voice had strangely unnerved the boy. "Why?" He frowned questioningly "What's wrong?". Deidara knew the girl in front of him was a weirdo and often behaved in silly ways, but today she sounded a bit more intense than he had thought.

'Damn!' The blond talked as if he wasn't aware whatsoever of the fact that the place he had attacked barbarically only one month ago was a town located in Iwagakure of which she was a part and enamoured - Kurotsuchi could never accept that.

"You are… a monster."

"Monster?" At first, he simply thought it was a novel name she had devised to call him in addition to 'asshole' and 'bastard'. Yet the word touched the tip of his tongue in a way he could not read. "Yes, I say you are a monster." She articulated every word carefully so it could be borne in on him that he had done something wrong by judging her voice, choice of words and intonation.

Yet he was a moron, after all.

"You're using it in the pejorative sense, mmm?"

She really, really wanted to roll her eyes. "Yes. But now fuck off. I don't want to see you anymore."

"Are you sick or something? Why are you talking about stuff I don't understand?"

"I say fuck off and I think you should understand what I mean."

"Why?"

"Because you're a monster!" She hissed, her voice muffled beneath layers of her thick blanket. She was still turning her back against him so that she wouldn't have to look at him. Well aware that she was feeling insecure, the girl elected to bury her face into the soft, comforting surface instead of facing and shouting at this abominable traitor standing right in her room.

"You're avoiding me."

"Why are we stating the obvious?"

"Why?"

"I'm not very interested in repeating myself but-"

"Why do you assert that I'm a monster?"

She stayed silent. There were thousands of things she wanted to say out loud, yet she didn't know how to put it simply. At long last, she murmured with anger, "I was appalled at your actions, Deidara. You're out of your mind. You're inhumane. I refuse to believe Iwagakure has produced such a shame. Last month, in a small town, I had to watch innocent people crying and suffering only because they wanted nothing but their rights…"

It was then that he started to have some clues about what she was talking about. "Oh"

"Of course you cannot remember much." She gritted her teeth, "What could you remember about your journey of killing people and destroying things other than the joy of causing your goddamn explosions?"

"Fuck off now. And never come to visit me again. I've tolerated enough." She growled, "I do miss you a lot – we both know that. But I've learnt that missing you is a wrong thing. It's natural but it's irrational. You're horrible and I shouldn't have let you come so close. It's that I'm stupid. Yeah, stupid. And I'm weak. And I'm so attached to you I was led into the sublime belief it was somewhat okay when I spent time with you but the reality-"

"Kurotsuchi, look at me." He tried to pull her blanket to his side, but she pulled it back. "No, I know I'm fucking weak when I look at your face and I'll give up and we'll say like goodbye after we've done things I feel ashamed of and always regret!" Probably Deidara didn't know that, but she was feeling embarrassed right now addressing such things so bluntly and explicitly. "I hate you Deidara. I've always hated you but now I hate you all the more. I cannot afford to make any other mistake. I cannot be weak."

"So," He offered, "What can I do now?". 'WHAT CAN YOU DO NOW?' She was riled. He knew why she was angry at him and knew very well that she despised his betrayal. And then he asked what he could do now? He thought he could do anything to redeem, that is to say, to exchange? What the fuck he thought he could do after he had killed and harmed people in her village savagely to calm her? He really considered her love and loyalty to her village to be that cheap? Was it that in his mind everything was super easy and he could get away with all his heinous crimes only because he was her friend, probably a secret one and her seemingly indissoluble, undeniable attachment to him? This boy in front of her was outright presumptuous.

"Don't even try to approach me. I hate you and I've been tricked enough." Everything was so hard. "I'm not tricking you or anything. I've said what I think and do what I think is acceptable."

"So killing innocent civilians is acceptable?"

"It's part of my job – I couldn't refuse just because I came from your village. At least I didn't try to kill you." She hated the way he always cited Iwa as her village. He was well aware it wasn't his anymore. It bored absolutely no relation to him. Not even the smallest part of his identity. He slowly put a hand on her shoulders from behind. "Kurotsuchi, I've said I treat you differently and I said I treated only you differently. Others wasn-."

She threw his hand away immediately and hissed, "Don't try to touch me again. Your words and ideas revolted me. I now reject your special care and love for me. I don't need a missing-nin to step into my life and mess with it. You're insane. You're very insane. You're so insane I cannot stand you appearing near me any longer."

"Kurotsuchi,-"

"What the fuck are you thinking? I cannot understand you! Okay now let's be honest: I think you are a barbaric monster who is selfish and doesn't care about anyone but yourself. You take delight and even pride in your stupid art that does nothing but cause pain, loss, destruction and a whole host of horrible stuff. You care about no one but yourself! What does art even mean if it brings no happiness and only serves to harm people around us? If benign and bereaved villagers being hurted is what happens so what is beautiful here? Is beauty blood, tears and death? Fucking NO, because we are human, flesh and blood. You're so insane you cannot feel pain. But not everyone is insane just like you – we have people to appreciate, love and care. And again, you don't care about anyone but yourself! You're a monster! You're crazy. You only want to see and delight in others' sufferings. Art is not about beauty, nor is it about entertainment. You have to look and watch it in depth! I seriously wonder when you will realise all that you've done is not anything like art but rather a repulsive, morbid passion born unwantedly after you joined the Explosion Corp."

"Enough, Kurotsuchi."

"Wow so I'm glad I'm making you impatient. So what now? You're going to kill me? I'm fucking ready to have a fight. Or you're just going to argue with me about art like you do with your equally stupid partner?" She scoffed, "If fear and terror is what you want to see in your victim's eyes, you'll never see in mine. Explosions are what? They're nothing less than asinine, empty, pompous displays of power. I hate the way you're so confident, overconfident about your strength and reputation that comes with your stupid 'art'. One day you'll die because of it. Die an ignominious death! You're no more than a silly boy who don't know-"

"Shut up!" He finally bursted out. She was so daring as to ridicule the purpose of his whole life – she had to count herself lucky she wasn't killed under his hand. Now he was angered, too. Of course, Deidara treated her differently but everyone had a limit. She knew full well she was crossing the line by slandering him and explosions and she still did it and refused to listen to him. That was a great offence and disrespect. The black-haired had been talking nonsense and incoherent things that meant nothing but a sacrilegious assault on his beliefs. He clenched his fists and glared at the girl in front of him, tolerance decreasing fast.

But it seemed that she was nothing but pleased when he tensed. While arguing, she gradually sat up. And now she had finally gained the courage to look at his face. Her black, sharp eyes fiercely clashed with his. She even smirked, as if she really wanted to challenge him and greatly enjoyed slamming his works. She wore ninja clothes, fully armed with weapons. She was ready.

Spark flew. But he didn't do anything.

"Wow?" She looked at him with distaste and something very subtle yet he could still see it, akin to… pain? "I've said what I want you to know. Now don't you have anything to say for me? Like other than 'shut up'?"

"You don't wanna fight?" She continued. He kept quiet. How come this talkative blond fell silent right this very moment? "You have nothing to say because what I've said sounds so right and you cannot controvert it?"

"You're arrogant. Explosions are of totemic significance to me whatever happens and whatever you say."

"You're arrogant, too. But there are too many things you're overconfident about I cannot mention all. The real world is very imperfect and not as you think."

Not only Deidara but Kurotsuchi also detested silence, especially the stifling, deadly silence that ensued. She lay down again and stopped looking at him.

"We're different, Deidara. Gosh, we're damn different. We clash and we could never fully understand each other. We have disparate goals and principles. We'll be an incongruous couple if we're together and I have to set the record straight: I know you love me or something less or more but that feeling wouldn't last long, I assure you – if you're so self-centred, or explosion-centred or something just as silly, you cannot deeply and truly care about anyone but you. And due to countless factors and undeniable facts, I can firmly assert we couldn't be together for too long. We couldn't have a happy future together so it's best we stop the present as soon as possible. Now I'm tired of missing and thinking of you. Leave me alone and I'll be able to let the feelings die. I don't ask you to not abandon me anymore. I don't need you to. I… hate you. It's not that hard to speak it out but yeah, I hate you. Don't come again. I will never find it in myself again to let you in and talk with you or do something just as intimate as we've done."

Her voice in the latter part made her words sound like a plea and he had seriously thought over it. The situation was now different – he had attacked one part of Iwagakure. He wanted to calm her, embrace her and pull her into a kiss like he had always done – expressing thoughts and emotions through physical contact and actions was the best way of fixing things. If one day everything would end then why shouldn't they value it when everything was still as it was? But he saw her eyebags and realised, "Oh and probably you don't know this, but your appearance and changes in your personality served to do nothing but deprive me of sleep for like weeks and it breaks me down a little bit everyday". She would resist him. She would hate him even more if he tried when she refused to permit him. She would lose sleep because of him. She would suffer and worse still, start to doubt herself when this kind of secret, unpleasant relationship still went on. She would feel like she was betraying her beloved village and overthink and cry and lose sleep and hate him again and again. All appeared quite dangerous.

"Okay, sorry anyway." Tough decisions were never too hard for him to make. "And I'll leave you. Alone... mmm" He breathed out, "I've made up my mind."

"For good?" She tossed around and looked at him directly. She wanted him to assure her.

"For good." Something in his blue eyes fluttered as the word he echoed had so strange an effect.

"Thanks." It was a promise. "Glad to see your back rather than your ugly face."

"But remember, I'll still love you, as always."

He disappeared. Maybe a bit too quickly and suddenly. She tossed around again and exhaled tiredly.

Winter Festival.

She walked alone on the crowded, bustling street. A small smile adorned her lips as she watched the beautiful things surrounding her – she was proud of her village. Two years before, Kurotsuchi had told herself she would never miss out on the joy of that very occasion again so that year she decided to go, with or without Deidara. She didn't know why yet today she still decided to be Kei, probably because she wanted nobody to notice her and say hi, or just because she was somehow used to being Kei in Winter Festivals. 'But this… reminds me so much of him.' The blond continued her way to buy food and enjoy simple things. It was a right decision not to give the festival a miss.

And she saw parents and their childrens, couples or two close friends together and a whole host of painful things, or at least they were painful to her, which had been the reason for which she hadn't visited this place three years ago. 'Deidara is not here.' Why was this kind of reality constantly leaping out at her? She felt strangely cold and her hand felt empty. 'Probably I'll ask Akatsuchi to come with me next year and not complain even when he visits nowhere but food shops.' She rolled her eyes before they unintentionally were set on a place.

"Hi, you're coming here again." The flower man beamed. She didn't know why her feet brought her there when her mind was busy wandering – they had to have a mind of their own or something! His kind, familiar face was right in front of her eyes and memories immediately filled her brain and chest. "SORRY MY GIRLFRIEND IS BEING A BIT PETULANT. DO YOU SELL ANY KIND OF FLOWER FOR PETULANT GIR-" "Oh, hi." She waved her hand in a genial manner.

"Where is your boyfriend?" He asked innocuously. She giggled lightly and answered, "Well, like, yeah we have… kinda broken up."

He blinked. "You guys broke up?"

"Yes…"

"Sorry I'm so rude."

"Nah it's a normal thing because people don't know things they don't see and hear, you know."

"But am I too nosey if I ask why? You guys looked like a perfect match. I thought this year you would marry, but oops sorry again. Yeah probably that's why my wife often complains about me – I'm so disrespectful." He immediately found himself talking clumsily, "Oh and by the way, do you want to get some flowers?"

"A bit nosey, but it's okay. We broke up because we inherently do not belong to each other. Things are very complicated to explain. I mean I know he still loves me and," she smiled, "..I still love him."

"All because of her. You know any type that suggests stuff like, umm, tenderness, yeah? I want her to look at the flower and learn something from it, like she should become less aggres-"

"But yeah it's fate, it's destiny or just something like that – we cannot control it so we give in. And about flowers, do you have any type for um, people who have broken up, like me?" She giggled again, "Broke up because they cannot control things and because they have fallen in love with the wrong person?"

The shop owner gave her an empathetic look. "I'm so sorry to hear that. But I can offer you sunflowers. I hope they can somehow brighten your day and help uplift your spirits after such events." She nodded, "But roses could also be a good choice, although often associated with romance and love, roses can also symbolise courage and strength during difficult times." "No, I don't want anything that relates any tiny bit to love. I want to forget him as soon as possible."

"So you'll buy sunflowers?"

"Yes."

He gave her a nice bunch and she paid for it. The man tried to change the topic, "And I have this one irrelevant question, where do you put flowers in your house?"

"In my bedroom."

"So you can see it as you wake up and remember what they mean? My wife does that, too."

'Actually I put them in the closet so no one can find out. Oh shit, I forgot that really, in my closet there are two bunches of flowers.' "Yeah, I mean, it's a good idea."

"Indeed."

"So, have fun today, even if it's without your boyfriend. Girls like you deserve better guys."

"Haha, thank you. Have fun with your wife, too."

"I'm not pleased you silently leave at night so frequently, Deidara." His partner told him the next morning.

"That will never happen again, Sasori-danna."

"What have you done?"

"Why do I have to answer you, yeah?"

"I suspect you."

"I've said that'd never happen again, danna."

Sasori rolled his eyes. "You should focus more on your work. I need not to warn you about the consequences of-"

"Okay, enough. I'll go collect clay right now, un."

The thrill of finding good clay surely helped him to take his mind off what had happened. His hand pressed the mass of clay he had recently found lightly and assessed its quality. "Great," he grinned. "Much above average." This was his true passion. Not long later, useless, inanimate clay would become living creatures which could move and cause destruction. Amazing, wasn't it?

"Is beauty blood, tears and death?"

Deidara couldn't care less. He just wanted to go on with what he was doing and witness beauty. It was beauty in his eyes. Art was simply something that was beautiful for one second, and then affected things around so much people had to fear it, respect and remember about it forever. It was so simple a concept yet hardly anyone could understand it. He deeply admired beauty and was satisfied he could use beauty for various purposes while he could still watch and enjoy it. Explosions were marvellous in that it could destroy, could kill, could vanish and flaunt its own greatness at the same time.

The blond concluded, only foolish people failed to see the beauty in explosions, and the girl he loved was obviously an idiot.

Although he couldn't say he missed her all the time, he could say 'a lot'.

It turned out to Deidara that Kurotsuchi wasn't the only one who's too emotionally involved in their relationship. When things were still okay, he had absolutely no problem with everything, still able to manage to finish his missions successfully, enjoy exploding and visit Iwagakure during unsociable hours. But after things had broken, he was utterly dismayed to notice that, whenever he killed an opponent and watched their parts of body covered with artistic yet transient blocks of smoke caused by him, he'd be reminded that there was a person who intensely abhorred what he was doing. That didn't cause much distraction, of course. But he knew she had messed with his mind. He hated the way something told him he wasn't right doing this inside his own gut just as he hated people looking down on his art.

Also, the blond hated the fact that when he suddenly wanted to see her as he always did on the spur of the moment, he could never leave to do that once again.

She didn't bother to ask herself why she had confessed that small fact to no one close to her but a flower seller.

Now that he had gone and never been a part of her life anymore, she felt… free. Free of restrictions inside her head, free of her scrutiny of her own self, free of self-recrimination as she no longer spent time with a traitor. Therefore, now love was justifiable – it came from one side only – her side. That boy didn't love her and he left her and the whole country. Nothing unusual had happened. Everything was simply an unfortunate story of a village being betrayed and losing a ninja full of potential. She was an unlucky girl who fell in love with the wrong person.

She told the flower seller that small fact, and certainly no one else would be aware of her feelings with him.

The black-haired opened her closet and looked at two bunches of flowers hidden in a corner. Kurotsuchi took them out, realising the flowers had dried out and some had fallen off the bunch. She suddenly felt a pang of nostalgia sweeping through her body. "Well, this bunch mostly consists of daisies and some colourful chrysanthemums in the centre." Her fingers gently ran over dried flower petals scattered around her place. "Violets' gentle and calming presence is often used to convey messages of sincerity, love, and peacefulness."

Eventually, she carefully got rid of all the stuff and went to bed to prepare for a new life. A life without Deidara whatsoever. Kurotsuchi couldn't be more excited.

Okay, now I'll criticize my own work even before anyone have the chance to:D I can see that the storyline is going a bit too fast, isn't it? Like they're visibly in love and suddenly a conflict crop up and they say goodbye forever in one night alone ಥ_ಥ Also, Deidara's conversation with Sasori is much too awkward (actually, I didn't care much about their interaction in the manga and the anime) but idk how I could fix it TvTT Moreover, I'm becoming more and more busy so I don't have much time to painstakingly take care of small details anymore (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)

By the way, sit up straight or you'll suffer from backaches;)