Chapter 17, part 1.
Alice lounged on an upholstered chaise longue on the deck of the villa where she, her family, and a bunch of other guests were housed for the three-days affair; she was swathed in a knitted wool blanket and enjoying a glass of an excellent Merlot while watching the sun dip beyond the tips of the trees and reflecting on the day that was just ending.
Despite her earlier misgivings, it turned out to be quite pleasant, perhaps because there hasn't been much idle time so far. Now was the first time since the early morning that she had a bit of time to take a breath—and it was only for an hour or so, before she had to go prepare for the rehearsal dinner. This was good—it didn't leave a lot of time to get pulled into her own puddle of darkness, although she knew the night would inevitably drown her in it again. For now, though, she felt okay.
Alice, Jake and their mom had gotten up early to get to the airport, and it was there that they met up with Oliver, Jake's boyfriend. Alice remembered that first meeting with a smile. In some respects, Oliver was very much like her brother: they both were incredibly vital, positive people that just brimmed with happiness which they shared with others willingly; in other ways, they couldn't be more different. If one were to ascribe to the stereotypical views on what was gay and what was straight, one must have come to the conclusion that there was no more hetero person than Jake: large, muscled, with a buzz cut and always wearing khaki or olive green cargo pants or dark jeans, and black rock band t-shirts; he looked completely macho. Oliver, on the other hand, was like a fashion peacock: his medium length hair stood up with the help of generous amounts of product and his slender frame looked slick in skinny light blue jeans, white button-up shirt opened all the way to the middle of his ribcage and a shiny gold jacket with black trimmings. Alice remembered Jake telling her that he had felt "a vibe" coming off from him but wasn't sure, and wondered how could he ever have any doubts; then she realized that Jake had met him at work, which meant that Oliver must have been in his paramedic uniform at the time, and it made more sense. Still, for Alice, who spent most of her time in the hyper-masculine environment of the military, it was clear that, even aside from his loud outfit, Oliver did not conform to the strict male and female binary; there was something soft and—at least stereotypically—feminine in how he carried himself. This, of course, was not proof of his sexuality—one needed only to look at Jake to see that those stereotypes were bullshit—but it was something new to Alice who had spent a lot of time with women being more stereotypically masculine but not vice-versa.
Oliver greeted them with a huge smile and then proceeded to give Jake a chaste kiss on the cheek and hug both Alice and her mom. It was clear that he was very excited to meet them—and to spend the weekend with his new boyfriend at the luxurious getaway.
"Oh, god, I just can't wait to, like, relax in a hot tub and get a facial and drink some gorgeous wine…" He kept saying. "Gorgeous" was his favorite adjective—he first used it to describe Alice ("Oh my god, you are, like, so gorgeous, girl, who gave you permission!"), making her feel both embarrassed and pleased, but soon she understood that in his vernacular, the word was like nice would be in hers—but at the same time, he seemed completely genuine in his enthusiasm. For Alice, who was much more mellow than that, it seemed bizarre, but apparently that was just his way and she soon learned to take it at face value.
There were more of Zach's wedding guests on their flight, though nobody Alice knew too well; they were all booked in First or Business Class, however, which, although the flight was short, was very nice nonetheless.
Once they arrived at the resort in Napa Valley, they were quickly put in a three-bedroom suite, where they had just a bit of time to freshen up before lunch; in the resort's renowned restaurant they'd met up with some of their friends: Aaron was there with his parents (but no Ike; he said the little guy would be bored here, and it was Sarah's weekend anyway), and so were Ian, Curt and Jeff, and some of their other common friends who were mere acquaintances to Alice. Everybody greeted Oliver with enthusiasm and not an ounce of awkwardness, which was what Alice had predicted but she felt relieved nevertheless.
Just after lunch, they all got packed up into vans and went on a tour of a few of Napa Valley's most prestigious wineries. They only got back half an hour before, and Alice took the time to relax a little bit, giving mom a bit of space to herself; Jake and Oliver went out on a stroll on the beautiful resort's grounds to steal a few moments together, just the two of them.
She was almost done with her glass of wine when she heard footsteps on the wooden deck and looked around to behold Aaron, looking handsome in a slate blue suit and a white shirt with a delicate print, made even more casual because it was paired up with white snickers.
"Hey!" He greeted her, coming to a halt next to her chaise longue. "Enjoying the peace and quiet for a while?"
"And desensitizing myself before dinner," she added with a smirk, lifting the glass that only had a kiss of red wine on the very bottom.
"Aw, come on, it won't be that bad." He grinned, leaning with his back on the balustrade, facing Alice. "A little birdie told me we'll be together at the fun table."
"The fun table?" She repeated, amused.
"Yeah, you know—all of the band, including its original and honorable members." He winked at her. "My parents and your mom will be at the adults' table."
Alice shook her head. "It was very nice of Zach to invite them."
"Yes, but I am not surprised—I mean, when we weren't at school, we were either at my house or yours. And your mom fed us whenever we went there, it couldn't have been more important for a bunch of teenagers going through the growth phase!"
Alice chuckled. "You may be right," she admitted. Being a graphic artist, her mom always worked from home, which meant that she was there when they got off from school, ravenous as only teenage boys could be; and she always had something delicious prepared for them to share. The Boyds did not have a nice basement where the band could practice, so, with their hunger satisfied, the party usually moved on from their place a few houses up the street to the Starrs. Aaron's parents both worked full time and weren't home until six or seven pm, so once she returned, Mrs. Starr's job had been to shoo them away to their own houses for dinner and homework.
Alice sighed, took the last sip of her wine and sat up, throwing the blanket off herself. "I guess it's time to get ready."
He looked at his watch. "You still have a bit of time, but yeah. Where are the boys?"
"Out to take a walk," Alice replied, grinning at the casual way he called them.
"Oliver seems like a very nice guy," Aaron noted, and the interest in his face told Alice that it was why he was here in the first place: he wanted to talk about Jake's boyfriend. "Though nothing about him is what I had expected."
"I know." Alice nodded, smirking. "His look is like straight from a Pride Parade—but I kinda love it."
"Me too!" Aaron enthused. "It's different—but nice different, you know?" He shook his head. "People always tell me I'm so metrosexual—but next to him, I'm like the most macho guy ever!"
Alice rolled her eyes. "You are a little bit metro," she acknowledged. "But that's what people love about you, so embrace it. Oliver certainly has—it's refreshing to see someone be so loudly who he is."
"Yeah. I hope a little bit of that rubs off on Jake—I mean, it seems like it already has, because look at him, getting out of the closet like a boss!" Aaron pumped his fist in the air. "Though I know he will never be like Oliver in the way he dresses—it's cargo pants for life for Jakey!"
Alice smiled sweetly, ignoring his last jibe. "I am very proud of him. It's not the end of the road—I mean, mom and friends are one thing, but there's still our two very conservative uncles and their families, not to mention the Marine Corps, but it's an amazing first step."
"He'll do great," Aaron declared confidently.
"I know." She stood up. "Alright, I really need to go get ready now—see you there?"
"See you there." He nodded and they parted with a smile.
She went back into the suite, where her mom was already dressed in a black pencil skirt and a flowy white long-sleeved shirt with tiny pink flower print, looking ten years younger than she was; and only the bit of grey in her red hair and wrinkles on her face belied that impression.
"Mom, wow, you look great!" Alice exclaimed. "Fancy but casual."
"Thank you, honey." Mom beamed, doing a little twirl. She didn't have much occasion to dress up and be among people, and until a little while ago the very perspective of doing that would stress her out; it was a testament to how well she was doing that she seemed excited, not nervous. "Now it's your turn, go on."
Alice smirked and retreated to her room to prepare. She had selected—or, rather, Deanna had selected for her—a dark green dress with a triangle décolletage, tied up in a knot on the side above the waist, and with an asymmetrical skirt showing the knee but a bit longer at the back. Low black pumps, black purse and black star-shaped earrings (Dee's birthday present) completed the look.
By the time she emerged from her room, Jake and Oliver were back and ready to go; Jake was wearing black jeans, a solid beige t-shirt and a dark grey blazer, looking tame and muted next to Oliver's loud magenta button-up shirt and skinny white pants. Alice smiled when she saw them, because they both looked handsome, completely different and somehow entirely right next to each other. Like yin and yang.
"Oh, god, Alice that dress is so gorgeous!" Oliver gushed when she joined them. "You and your mom both have such a sense of style, so classy and yet sexy, oh my god!"
Alice smirked. "Thanks, Oliver—you boys look very nice, too."
"Can we go now?" Jake asked, his expression a little pained.
"Let's go," Eileen agreed and led the way.
The rehearsal dinner was held at the same restaurant where the lunch was, only with bigger, round tables. Mom sat with Mr. and Mrs. Starr, with some other folks around their age, while Alice, Jake and Oliver were led to a table already occupied by Aaron, Ian, Curt and Jeff—the latter three accompanied by their girlfriends. Paired up as the others were, Alice ended up sitting right next to Aaron on one side, with Jake on the other.
The dinner turned out to be quite pleasant—thanks mostly to the fun company at Alice's table. The food was excellent, and the wine even better, and the conversation flowed around her casually and smoothly. Alice, as was her way, spoke little and listened more, and her friends didn't expect anything else from her, so the evening went by in a nice, relaxed atmosphere. There were a couple speeches from Zach and Chiyo, thanking their families and friends for their help in the planning of the wedding, but other than that, it was just a casual dinner; the bride and groom made a round among all their guests to ask how they were doing and if they were enjoying themselves, so Alice and the others could talk to them for a moment, but they spent most of the evening at their own table. Alice thought Chiyo's Japanese family looked a little lost, so it was little wonder that the bride would spend her time with them to make them feel cared for.
The dinner ended quite late in the evening, and everyone was more than a little tipsy on all the wine they'd consumed throughout the day; Alice didn't really police herself, either, and although she wasn't exactly drunk, she felt the pleasant little buzz of alcohol blunting the sharp edges of her emotions and allowing her to actually fall asleep without any additional aid she would usually use.
The next morning, the entire party split into a few groups: some went to test the nearby fairways, others stayed in to try out the available spa treatments, and a fair few gathered in the resort's lounge to play cards, talk and drink even more wine. Oliver convinced Jake and Eileen to accompany him to the spa, but Alice declined, not really fond of the idea of strangers touching her body, even in the most innocent way possible. Instead, she decided to get down to the resort's half-covered and half-open air swimming pool; it was on the roof and partially looking out onto the rolling hills of the wine country, and partially hidden under a glass covering that provided shelter from the wind and chill of the late October morning. The water in the pool was warmed up to balmy eighty degrees, making dipping in pleasant even though the air outside was only in mid-fifties.
Alice wasn't the only one in the pool, but the two other people kept away and talked to each other while splashing about idly; she couldn't remember if they were part of the wedding party or not, but either way, she ignored them and got a good couple dozen laps, treating it like a workout that it was, and not really recreational swimming. It wasn't until she started getting out of the pool when she noticed another person standing at the edge—Aaron, dressed in jeans and a polo shirt and watching her with a bit of an odd expression on his face. She had seen it on him before—usually in similar circumstances, like when they went out on a beach or something, when they were younger. She chucked it up to boys being boys and it even pleased her that he found her attractive, although it usually also made her feel weird—they were so close, she treated him like a brother. But that thought made her a bit uncomfortable now, too—maybe because he kept staring at her as she reached for a towel to wrap herself in. It definitely didn't feel like a brotherly look.
"Hey," she said, a little shyly, making sure that the towel was snug all around her.
"Hi", he replied, swallowing hard; she could see his Adam's apple move up and then down again. "Have a nice swim?"
"I don't get to swim very often in Colorado, so it's a nice change. Though it's a bit chilly," she admitted; now that she was out of the water, the skin on her arms and legs was showing goosebumps.
He nodded, looking around, and then grabbed one of the superfluous towels on a nearby chair. He approached to put it over Alice's shoulders. "Here."
"Thanks," she murmured, grabbing the edges and pulling it closer around herself. "I thought you'd be out, golfing or spa-ing or something."
"I can't golf," he admitted a bit sheepishly, stepping away to give her back her personal space. "I took a steam bath in the morning—it's excellent, by the way, I recommend you try it, it'll warm you right up—but by the time I got out, all the spa treatments were booked until lunch."
"Bummer," she agreed.
"Jake told me you came up here to take a swim, I thought I'd come and cheer you on, but you didn't seem to see me and then that couple started making out in the water and it just felt too awkward!" He laughed, regaining some of his normal warm and playful countenance.
"I'm glad I got out before they move on to something more," Alice joked, leaning over to her side to wring the water out of her hair. Short as it was, it retained a lot and a small stream spilled onto the tiles. While she did so, the towel on her shoulders slipped off and would have landed on the ground if Aaron didn't step up to catch it and bring it back up. In doing so, his hand touched Alice's collarbone and she felt a little shiver travel up her back. She straightened up and stepped away, catching the towel and pulling it up herself.
"Sorry," he murmured, his eyes trained on the scars that crisscrossed on her shoulder like a subway map.
Alice shook her head. She didn't particularly like anyone seeing her scars, even if they'd already had before; if there had been more people in the swimming pool, she wouldn't have come just because of that. "I'm gonna go change," she said, her words a little rushed. "See you at lunch?"
"Sure," he replied, giving her an odd look, but she ignored it and retreated quickly.
The wedding ceremony began at five in the afternoon, at the beautiful outdoor venue a little ways away from the main resort, with the rolling hills of red and orange foliage for a backdrop. The groom, handsome in a traditional black tux, stood at the wedding arch, facing the crowd of guests, all in suits and gowns; the entire scene was basked in the golden rays of the waning sun, making the colors more vibrant and casting long shadows. And then Chiyo came out, escorted by her father; she wore a gorgeous white and pink dress that was a mix of typical western wedding gown and a Japanese kimono—and it looked perfectly blended, the two styles completing and complementing each other rather than standing at odds. She walked down the aisle to the dulcet tones of a piano-and-cello arrangement of Pachelbel's Canon in D. The officiant married them with the old, traditional vows, but they both repeated them in Japanese. Alice thought it a sweet gesture for Chiyo's family who spoke very little English.
After the ceremony ended, there were some cocktails and hors d'oeuvres passed around by servers in white suits as the happy couple received congratulations from everyone. It lasted maybe half an hour and then they disappeared to take some photos in the waning light of day, while the guests mingled, before the master of ceremony shepherded them all back to the resort's triple-Michelin-starred restaurant, now transformed into a wedding reception venue, with long tables placed in a U-shape, and lots of space for dancing in the middle. Alice was seated in between her mom and brother, opposite Aaron and his parents—although she only guessed it was Aaron's place, because he wasn't actually there, and she wondered about it until she saw him appear at the back of the room with a microphone as the DJ in the corner started playing an upbeat instrumental song that sounded vaguely oriental. The newlyweds glided into the room, greeted by a thunderous applause of all their guests—and there were more than two hundred people there—and then, as the song ended, they stood in the middle of the U-shape of tables and the lovely warm tones of Can't Help Falling In Love began. The music was clearly pre-recorded, but it was Aaron who sang the lyrics, and very well; his voice was not as deep as Elvis Presley's had been, but his raspy baritone lent itself very well to the sweet notes of the song. As he sang, he looked at the couple waltzing in the middle of the room, except once, when his eyes strayed to the crowd and stopped to rest on Alice.
Like a river flows
Surely to the sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things are meant to be
Take my hand
Take my whole life too
For I can't help falling in love with you
Alice looked down at her empty plate, suddenly embarrassed and scared. This could not be happening, could it? She could not lose another friend like this; and while the situation with Deanna was awkward, it was still passable because they'd only known each other a few months. But she'd known Aaron for twenty-seven years, were best friends with him all this time, and the thought that she might lose him because of some unrequited momentary infatuation made her physically sick to her stomach. But, as she peeked up from beneath her lashes, she noted his eyes were back on Zach and Chiyo, and she breathed with relief. Maybe it was a coincidence. Or maybe it was just a flush of testosterone from seeing her in her bathing suit before—she didn't really know how it worked for men. Either way, she had to make sure that he understood she only ever saw him as a friend. A good one, clearly, a soul mate really—but in a strictly platonic way.
But as the song ended, she looked around and saw couples everywhere holding hands, resting their heads on their other half's shoulders, looking into each other's eyes, and she suddenly felt lonely and bereft. She closed her eyes, knowing that if only things had gone another way—if she hadn't screwed up so badly—she would be sitting here with Karim next to her, holding his hand and looking into his eyes.
Suddenly, there was a touch on her shoulder and she jerked away, her eyes snapping open to look at Jake, a little wild.
"You okay?" He whispered, Oliver peeking curiously from behind him.
"Yeah, fine," she murmured, trying to shake off the longing and the grief. It was not the time nor the place for this. She forced a smile and shifted her gaze back to the happy couple, who was just taking a bow before their audience.
To Alice's profound relief, Aaron acted completely normal for the rest of the night. He laughed a lot while talking to friends, and danced with every girl who asked—although, Alice noted, he didn't ask anyone to dance himself. Nevertheless, he was back to being her best friend, and that was what mattered.
It was almost two in the morning and the party was already experiencing a bit of a lull. There were still people dancing—Jake and Oliver among them—but most of the party was already dispersing, taking their leave of Zach and Chiyo one by one, as minutes trickled by. Mom had made her excuses and retreated to her room before midnight, and Alice was starting to think she ought to follow in her footsteps, but for the moment she still sat at a table, a wineglass in her hand, alone, looking at the crowd dancing in front of her. She had declined to dance herself, even though there were more than a couple guys asking—and not everyone familiar to her. She let them off gently, joking that she could not possibly dance in those heels and dress, which was partially true—she was wearing an ankle-length light blue gown with a slit from halfway up her thigh and a pair of stilettos, a combination that would surely have her stumble and fall had she attempted to dance.
Someone approached her and dropped on the chair next to her.
"Hey, mind if I join you?" He asked belatedly, his voice drawling with a Southern accent. Alice looked him over—he was unfamiliar to her: average of built and height, he had brown hair and blue eyes and a face that was neither typically handsome nor especially interesting. His wide smile made him look pleasant and approachable, though.
"Sure," Alice agreed, taking a sip of her wine. She wasn't exactly drunk but she was feeling a pleasant buzz in her head that dulled the world around her and emotions inside her to a bland uniformity.
"I'm Joe," he said, reaching out to shake her hand.
"Alice."
"Are you Chiyo's friend?"
"Zach's." She shook her head and the room spun a little. "We grew up together, my brother was one of the original members of the band, back when they were just five teenagers playing in Aaron's basement." She gestured at Jake, dancing with Oliver on the other side of the room, close to the bar.
"Cool," Joe replied with a grin. "Must be really nice to know celebrities so closely. Yesterday was my first time meeting one, can you believe it—and I've lived in Los Angeles for, like, twelve years now!"
"So I take it you're one of Chiyo's guests?"
"Oh, yes, we work together," he answered dismissively, but it piqued Alice's interest.
"Oh really? So you're a researcher at CalTech, too?"
"Yep. We are trying to uncover mysteries of Cosmic Microwave Background radiation," he confirmed, his words just a bit slurred. "It's like, this thing that was left over from the Big Bang—"
"I know what CMB is," she interrupted him with a smirk. "I've actually done some work on it in the past, though I was just a research assistant, back then."
"No way!" He enthused, sloshing his wine in its glass in excitement. "You're a fellow scientist?"
"Technically I'm an engineer, but I dabble in science, too." She nodded vigorously and regretted it immediately, as it made the room spin even more. "I have a PhD in Computer Engineering, with a focus in Artificial Intelligence and Machine Learning."
"Cool!" He repeated with a beaming smile. "Where is your PhD from?"
"AFIT, but I did my undergrad degree at CalTech."
"No way! You're one of us!" He actually spilled a bit of his wine this time. "But what is AFIT? I don't think I've ever heard of it."
"Air Force Institute of Technology," she explained, draining her glass. "I'm an officer in the Air Force. Joined straight after finishing CalTech."
"Wow." He blinked quickly, giving her an appraising look. "You do not look like a soldier!"
"Technically I'm an airman," she corrected him with a smile and then stood up. "Excuse me, I'm gonna grab another glass."
"I'll come with you," he offered and followed her across the room to the open bar. He leaned on the counter, standing uncomfortably close to her so she took a step sideways while ordering.
"So how is it, being an airman?" He asked with the kind of smile that Alice did not like. "I bet it's all very strict. Aren't you glad to be here where you can relax and have a little fun?" And he shuffled a little closer to her again.
Alice rolled her eyes. Why were these things happening to her so often nowadays? "I am here to celebrate my friend's wedding," she replied, her voice harsh, as she took one more step to get him out of her intimate zone.
"Yeah, but you can, you know, let your hair down… I know you're here alone—I mean, with your brother, but I noticed you don't have a plus one…" He reached out and touched her shoulder.
She jerked away. "Stop," she warned him. "I'm not interested." And then she turned to the bartender who was just putting a glass on the counter before her. "You know what, I changed my mind. I think I've had enough." She pivoted around and started walking away.
"Oh, come on, don't be like that!" Joe called after her and then grabbed her arm.
Later, she could not remember making any sort of decision; it was as if her body reacted all on its own. She felt his hand on her, and five seconds later he was laying on the ground, face-down, her hand on his wrist, his whole arm twisted into an unnatural angle, and she was kneeling on his back.
"Owwww!" He cried out in pain. She blinked, realizing what she had done, and released him immediately, jumping up, teetering on the too-high stilettos. Only then she noticed the commotion around her, people gasping and gaping. And then Jake, Oliver and Aaron appeared next to her.
"Are you alright?" Aaron asked, stepping closer and reaching out—almost, but not quite touching her.
Jake was helping Joe up from the ground while Oliver, his face smooth and businesslike, took his arm into his hands to examine it.
"I'm fine," Alice breathed, her heart fluttering in her chest like a caged bird, her breath quick and shallow. "I'm sorry, I—it was a reflex," she said louder, so that Joe would hear.
"You broke my arm!" He howled, his face screwed up in a painful grimace.
"It's not broken, it's just strained," Oliver opined confidently.
"And what do you know?!" Joe protested plaintively.
"I'm a paramedic," Oliver replied calmly. "You'll be alright—it'll hurt for a bit, that's all, no damage."
"You're crazy!" Joe barked at Alice, and her blood boiled.
"I told you to stop!" She hissed, her cheeks coloring with anger. "I told you I wasn't interested! It's not my fault you don't understand when a woman says no!"
He yelped in pain; Jake, who was still holding on to him to steady him, squeezed his arms a little too tight.
"Not cool, man," he said; it was clear in his voice and face that he was trying to keep from exploding. "You shouldn't put your hands on a woman, especially after she'd already told you to fuck off."
"Jake." Oliver reached out and patted his hand.
Jake let go and stepped away, his expression dark.
"Come on, man, I'll get you an icepack," Oliver said to Joe, a warning in his tone. "You'll be good as new by the morning." And he towed the unwilling man with him towards the staff entrance.
"I'm sorry," Alice said, sighing, to no-one in particular. Her anger, as quick as it was to rise, had already subsided and she felt embarrassed. "I didn't want to cause a scene."
"Don't apologize." Aaron shook his head vehemently. "You had every right to put him in his place!"
"I overreacted."
"Maybe a little, but—he's fine, isn't he?" He said, his voice soothing.
Alice shook her head, her mortification growing by the minute as everyone continued to stare at her. "I think I'm gonna go to my room," she murmured. "Please give Chiyo and Zach my apologies." And then she turned around and fled.
Just outside, Jake caught up with her. "Are you okay, sis?"
"Fine," she lied. "It wasn't me who ended up on the ground."
"Yeah, well, he deserved it," he said with a note of vengeance in his tone.
"Did he?" She shrugged. "He just grabbed my hand, that's not exactly a crime…"
"Yeah, well… he shouldn't have startled you like that."
Alice didn't reply; she knew exactly what he didn't want to say. A reflex reaction like that wasn't normal—but it was one of the common symptoms of PTSD. The thought was distressing, though not new; only, until now, she was able to avoid it, put it away in the corner of her mind and never analyze it any closer. It would be much harder to do tonight, alcohol or not.
She woke up after a mere couple hours of sleep, dizzy and hungover, and decided not to go for breakfast. She told mom, Jake and Oliver that she didn't feel too well—which was true, but extended beyond the physical discomfort—and urged them to go without her, while she ordered room service. She did force herself to attend Zach and Chiyo's sendoff—they were leaving for their honeymoon somewhere on the Seychelles before noon. Not long after that, most guests packed up and went home.
Mom, as the only one who hadn't drunk the previous night, drove them in their rental back to San Francisco Airport, where she, Jake and Oliver got on a plane to LAX; Alice, after saying goodbye to her little family, walked instead to another gate to wait for her direct flight to Denver.
She sat down on one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs and pulled out her phone to kill some time. There was a notification of a Direct Message waiting for her on Twitter, and she opened it curiously. She had gotten a dozen or so of DMs after Aaron's tweeted about her birthday, but it'd been pretty quiet on that front since then—it could be a delayed reaction, she thought as the message was displayed on the little screen.
Hi!, it said. My name is Marc and I am the owner of the website In Layman's Terms.
Are you the Tinkerbell who had been writing all those wonderful, long, excellently-researched comments on there?
Alice raised her eyebrows. It had been her favorite science blog back when she was an F-302 pilot, and later while she was at AFIT; but she had lost it from view after she'd been reassigned to Atlantis. It was curious that the owner should remember her—it had been at least three years since she'd left any comments there. Intrigued, she switched from Twitter to a browser and typed in the well-remembered address. The website had a new layout, she noted—not as shabby as it used to be, looking much more professional. A few minutes of digging told her that in the past three years it had known a golden age—lots of articles with a great many comments, much more than when she had been active on the site. The last article, however, was from a couple months ago, and since then—nothing.
Hi Marc! Yep, that's me, she wrote back. I'm surprised that you remember me—it's been quite some time. However did you manage to find me?
He didn't reply right away; it was almost time to board the plane when a new notification came in.
I look for new sources of information out of habit and I stumbled across your profile because you were sharing so much of quality content!
Then I realized your handle was almost like that of an old commenter on my blog and wanted to check if it was you!
I have to wonder tho if the reason why you stopped commenting was bc of sth I did?
She smiled crookedly. Not at all. I went away for a while to a place with no wifi (I know, right?! The horror!). I've only been back a few months.
OMG, how did you survive such an ordeal? ;) Anyway, I'm glad it wasn't my fault! I missed your amazing comments. They were v. motivating.
Alice raised her eyebrows. Seems like I've missed the best times for the blog. There's been quite a lot of traffic recently!
You have no idea, he replied. I've been workin on popularizing science all this time and I've finally started reaching a bigger audience.
Unfortunately, I had to give it up. I still haven't announced it on the site, but I'm afraid I'm gonna need to close it.
She frowned, disappointed. Why? If you don't mind me asking. You've been doing a great job.
Thanks. My wife has been diagnosed with cancer a couple months ago. I don't have time to research and write science articles anymore.
She blinked quickly, heavyhearted. I'm so sorry. That's awful. How is she doing?
Not bad, all things considered. She's fussing over losing her hair, of all things! lol She's got a decent shot at beating the bastard.
That's great to hear! I hope she kicks its ass ;)
Thank you! I do feel a little bad. A lot of people were reading the blog. Feels like I'm somehow betraying or disappointing them.
Don't give it another thought. Of course you need to spend your time with your wife, not on some silly blog. People will understand.
She raised her head to listen to an announcement.
I gotta go—at the airport now, and they're calling my flight. All the best to you and your wife!
She stood up, putting the phone away, and headed towards the gate to board the plane. This time, unfortunately, it was Economy class for her—the happy couple only booked First or Business class for those who were commuting between LAX and SFO.
She took her seat next to a black-clad man with extra long legs—his knee was protruding to the left, into her own leg space—and a pair of earphones she could hear his loud metal music from despite the hum and hubbub of people shuffling all about; and on the other side of her was a (thankfully much smaller) blonde woman who looked around nervously since the moment she sat down.
Alice pulled her phone out again to check if Marc had replied, but since he hadn't, she switched it to flight mode and put it away. Then she took out her e-reader and tried to focus on the book, but her concentration kept slipping away. Finally, irked at herself, she shoved it into the pocket of the seat in front of her and closed her eyes, wishing she could just turn off her brain and drift off—but, despite having slept so little that night, she could not; as always, thoughts and feelings came unbidden, and she fought them off with all the strength she could muster.
They were already up in the air for a long while when the plane shook in a bout of turbulence, and suddenly the woman next to her yelped—and then Alice felt something cold and wet on her thighs.
Alice opened her eyes, miffed, and looked at the blonde, her face scrunched in a frown. A cup of water was laying on its side on the tray table, its contents pouring onto Alice's lap. The woman instantly snatched it up, but it was too late—Alice's pants were already soaking.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" The blonde gasped, looking at Alice anxiously. "I didn't mean to—I needed water to wash down my pill—I hadn't expected that turbulence—" And she looked around a little wildly as the plane shook again.
Alice worked on smothering her anger as she pulled a bag of Kleenex out of her bag to try and dry herself up a little. "Don't worry, it's okay," she told the woman, trying for calm but sounding more robotic than composed. "It's just water—it'll dry out before we land." Or so she hoped—she had no interest in parading across the airport looking like she'd peed herself.
"I'm so sorry," the woman apologized again. "I hate flying and it makes me extra clumsy. Ow!" She yelped again as the plane jumped up and down on an air current.
Alice looked at her with a bit of pity; she was white as a sheet, and her eyes were very wide.
"It's okay," she repeated, her earlier annoyance already forgotten. "There's nothing to be scared of—it's just a bit of turbulence. As long as you stay in your seat, you're completely safe."
The woman didn't look convinced, and when the plane jerked this way and that again, she shut her eyes, her hands on the armrests, knuckles white. "It doesn't feel safe!" She complained plaintively.
"Modern aircraft is built to withstand even the worst turbulence, much less the gentle swaying we're experiencing now," Alice told her, her voice soothing. "There hasn't been an airplane crash caused by turbulence since the sixties."
At this, the blonde opened her eyes and looked at Alice, surprised out of her fear. "Really?"
Alice smiled reassuringly. "Really."
"Wow. Why is that not public knowledge?"
Alice shrugged. "People love to be afraid, I guess. Why else would disaster movies be so popular?"
The woman laughed nervously. "You're certainly right. I just wish someone had told me that before!" She took a deep breath and braced herself as another turbulence shook the plane, but this time she didn't close her eyes. "It's still pretty freaky. I hate flying so much… how can fifty tons of metal fly through the air!? I wish I paid attention in school when they explained it!"
Alice smirked. "Well, it's rather simple. The engines of the plane move it forward, which makes the air move over the wings at great speed, pushing it downwards, toward the ground—and that creates lift that overcomes the force of gravity pulling the weight of the plane to the Earth."
The blonde looked at her, her eyes open wide. "You make it sound so easy!"
"Well, it's not that easy—it's all about the wings, really, and how they're built to reduce the air pressure on top while increase it underneath. They are also slightly angled and that helps to push the air downward, and if you remember Newton's third law of motion, the force of the air going down must be met with the equal and opposite force of the plane going up."
The woman blinked quickly. Alice noted that she had pretty blue eyes and long lashes that framed them very nicely. She was, in general, quite pretty, with her blonde hair twisted into a lush, thick braid and a heart-shaped face that looked kind and approachable with the little nervous smile that appeared every now and then on her lips. She was a bit older than Alice—late thirties, perhaps.
"Am I just dumb or are you like a science teacher or something?" She asked with a bit of a self-deprecating humor.
"I have a Bachelor of Science degree in Applied Physics," Alice explained. "And I'm a pilot to boot. So you're off the hook, I guess."
"A pilot? Really?" She looked a bit agitated.
Alice nodded with a smirk. "So, you see, if anything happens, I can always fly the plane myself," she joked. "Anyways, there's really nothing to fear. The odds of dying in a plane crash are something like one in two hundred thousand; compare that to the risk of dying in a car crash, which is like one in a hundred."
The woman flinched a little, her clear blue eyes clouding for a moment. "Oh, I know that. My husband just died in a car crash a few months ago, I've heard all the statistics…"
Alice sighed. "I'm sorry to hear that."
But the woman shook her head. "It's okay. I'm working through the grief—that's why I'm moving to Colorado. Kinda want to get away from our house for a while."
Alice smiled sadly. She understood that instinct all too well; in the first moments after Karim's death, she wanted to go back to Atlantis so badly—but now, when she thought about it, she thought maybe it was good she had been reassigned. To have his memory constantly around her like a ghost haunting would certainly not help in her current state… "Colorado is not a bad place to live," she said, trying to change the subject to something lighter.
"I've heard that, too." The woman acknowledged. "I'm actually excited to see what this new chapter will bring me. New beginnings can be enormously healing." She then smiled to Alice. "And hey, look! We've been talking all this time throughout the turbulence and I haven't near-fainted once!"
"It should be smoother now for a while," Alice said with a smirk. "We're out of the Great Basin, but you should prepare yourself for when we reach the Rockies. That's where most turbulence appears because the mountains break the air flows."
The woman shivered at the thought and then shook her head. "I am grateful to you. Here I was, being clumsy and spilling water all over you, and you not only did not bite my head off, which would be perfectly understandable, but you actually talked to me to allay my fears. And that to a perfect stranger! That's extremely kind of you."
Alice shrugged. "You were lucky, physics and flying are two of my favorite subjects," she answered lightly.
"Nevertheless, you were trying to sleep and I interrupted you so rudely!" The woman rolled her eyes at herself. "I will leave you alone now, promise."
Alice forced a smile. Actually, the conversation succeeded at distracting her away from her dark thoughts—but this was not something she was ready to admit to this stranger, friendly as she was; and so she only nodded and then they both lapsed into silence. Alice closed her eyes and tried once again, in vain, to drift off, but all she managed to do was throw herself into a downward spiral until, at last, she felt the angle of their flight change and she knew they were approaching the airport.
"It's almost over!" The blonde woman said to her in a low voice, her eyes sparkling, as she saw Alice look at her. Alice smirked and decided not to inform her that, statistically, most plane crashes happened during landing.
This time, they touched down without problems, however, and soon enough they were taxiing to the gate and Alice observed all of the nervousness lift off the blonde in the next seat, calm coming back to her face. Before they stood up to walk down the aisle towards the exit, she thanked Alice once again and then waved cheerfully before stepping off the plane. Alice spotted her again by the baggage carousel, but they merely smiled to each other from opposite sides of the conveyor belt and that was the last time they would see each other—or so Alice thought.