Hazbin Hotel: Part 1
"Once upon a time, there was a glowing city protected by golden gates, known as Heaven. It was ruled by beings of pure light. Angels that worshiped good and shielded all from evil. Lucifer was one of these angels. He was a dreamer with fantastical ideas for all of creation. But, he was seen as a troublemaker by the elders of Heaven. For they felt his way of thinking was dangerous to the order of their world."
"So, he watched as the angels began to expand the universe in their ways. From the dust of Earth, they created Adam and Lilith. Equals as the first of mankind, but despite this, Adam demanded control, and Lilith refused to submit to his will. She fled the Garden. Drawn in by her fierce independence, Lucifer found her and the two rebellious dreamers fell deeply in love. Together, they wished to share the magic of free will with humanity, offering the Fruit of Knowledge to Adam's new bride, Eve, who gladly accepted. But this gift came with a curse. For with this single act of disobedience, evil finally found its way into the Earth. With it, a new realm of darkness and sin. And the order Heaven worked to maintain was shattered."
"As punishment for their reckless act, Heaven cast Lucifer and his love into the dark pit he had created, never allowing him to see the good that came from humanity, only the cruel and the wicked. Ashamed, Lucifer lost his will to dream. But Lilith thrived, empowering demonkind with her voice and her songs. And as the numbers of Hell grew, so did its power."
"Threatened by this, Heaven made a truly heartless decision. That every year, they would send down an army, an Extermination, to ensure Hell and its sinners could never rise against them. But Lilith's hope remained. And her dream was passed down to their precious daughter, the Princess of Hell."
Charlie finishes narrating, she closes a book titled "The Story of Hell" and looks out to Pentagram City.
"Don't worry, Mom. I'll make you proud." Charlie soberly looks out the window to Pentagram City burning to the ground, just as Lobo and Vaggie come into the room.
"Charlie?" Lobo asks in concern as the key Charlie is holding transforms into KeeKee who scampers away, and Charlie turns to them in surprise.
"Aah! Oh, shit. Did you hear all that?" Charlie asked as Lobo and Vaggie chuckled at her startled reaction "Uh, yeah. We have been standing here since you started reading the book." Vaggie said as she and Lobo walked to the couch and sat next to Charlie.
"Sorry. I get pre-tty worked up after an extermination happens. The story helps me calm down" Charlie said.
Vaggie chuckles "Don't worry. We enjoy your theatrics. Are you okay babe?" Vaggie asked.
"I'm fine. Just... thinking, ya' know? Family stuff." Charlie sighed. As Lobo rubs her back in comfort "Did you hear from your mom?" Lobo asked her.
Charlie shakes her head in dismay. "Oof… how long has it been since you last talk to your mom?" Vaggie asked.
"Not that long, only...four...years, she's off doing something important, I'm sure! But, this kingdom was something she really cared about. Something I care about."
"Well, at least you're not alone in this because you have two other people that share your dream as well." Vaggie said
Charlie smiles for a moment before frowning as she sighs. "I just hope that what I'm trying to do here will work." Charlie said before Lobo poked her forehead drawing a yelp from her.
"What did I say about doubting yourself? Remember that you have friends who have faith in you. No matter what happens, just know that we will find a way to achieve your dream." Lobo said.
Charlie smiles as she kisses both Lobo and Vaggie then hugs them "Thank you the both of you. What will I ever do without you two's." Charlie said.
Vaggie chuckles "Alright, come on babe. Alazia says she has something to show us." Vaggie said as they got up as Vaggie and Lobo left.
A loud bell rings throughout the city, and Charlie turns to the rebuilt Bell Tower at Heaven Embassy. She looks on with sadness, knowing that it's another year before the Extermination comes again.
The scene turns static before it fixes itself to reveal a sinner stabbing another demon to death with a knife before Alazia caught their attention. "Well, hello there, you wayward Sinner! Do you like blood, violence, and depravity of a sexual nature? Of course you do, that's why you're in Hell! But what would you say if I told you there was a place to stay that had none of that? Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, a misguided path to redemption! Founded five days ago by Lucifer's delusional daughter, Charlotte Morningstar!"
"Come place your fate in her inexperienced hands, as she tries to work through her daddy issues by fixing you! Here we offer fun things, such as somewhat functional staff and 24-hour pest control. Custom rooms, and just look at this tacky parlor! Enjoy riveting conversation with our singular resident. Wow! All this, and more at the Hazbin Hotel! Your last desperate attempt at salvation starts here!"
Alazia turns off the television as she looks back to the couch, Charlie, Lobo and Vaggie were surprised of the commercial being poorly misleading and very offensive to their nature.
"So, what do you think?" She asked looking proud of herself
Vaggie couldn't comprehend what she saw. "I'm sorry. What the fuck was that?" she said as Charlie smile apologetic "Uh, Yeah. One note, Alazia, I mean, first off, thank you so much for making this seriously amazing, but um, maybe the tone is a bit off. We want people to want to come here. This makes it look, um…"
Lobo interrupted Charlie as he shook his head "The word you're looking for is bad." He said as Alazia grinned widened "Funny. I was going for hilarious." Alazia said.
"It didn't explain anything about how we're trying to save demons from extermination, which is the whole fucking point." Vaggie said as Charlie nodded "Vaggie is right Alazia, the commercial was to let sinners know we are trying to help them."
"Well, my dear, I haven't been active in hell for some time and everyone remembers me from my radio show, the proper medium to express oneself. But, you insisted on this noisy picture box advertisement." She said as she tapped the television twice with her microphone staff. "So, I had a little fun with it."
"Oh, fun? You had a little fun with it?" Vaggie said as she stands up "Well, this is not what we want to represent us. When you showed up here a week ago, you told us you would help run this hotel. Instead, you're mocking us. Nobody's gonna wanna come to a place where a powerful overlord like you thinks is a waste of time." Vaggie said
Angel Dust raises his hand from the couch, catching everyone's attention. Vaggie raised an eyebrow "What? Angel."
"If'n you're filming a commercial, can I suggest you take better advantage of the two talented celebrities you have here?" Angel Dust said as he takes a bottle with one arm before pointing all two arms at himself then one at Lobo but Vaggie doesn't like where this is going.
Vaggie sighs before facepalming "Angel, you're a porn star." Vaggie said.
"A famous porn star, I'll have the horniest sinners knocking these walls down to get in." Angel Dust said
"We are not filming a porn as a commercial. Angel, we are trying to redeem Sinners, not encouraging them with more sins." Vaggie said.
"Why not? Sex sells don't it? I swear if you film me going at it with 'Mr. Big Dog' here, you'd be rolling in participants willing to stay at this tacky hotel." Angel said.
Lobo shakes head "For the last time Angel it never gonna happen." Lobo said as he rubbed his forehead.
"Angel, I appreciate you wanting to use your special skills to, um, attract folks to the hotel, but I really don't want to exploit you in that way." Charlie said.
"Oh, please, baby. This body was made to be exploited. I got the arms, I got the stamina, I got the legs. I got the lung capacity. (laughs). Oh, I got the legs. The gag reflex, the holes, the chest fluff everyone thinks are tits." Angel said before he smirked, "Or how about you have Big Dog over here in his boxers oiled up and you have every Sinners and Devils lined up knocking on the hotel door waiting to get in." Angel Dust said.
Charlie and Vaggie were about to comment on that before that image popped into their heads. Both girls suddenly blushed as blood started to run down their noses at the hot image. Angel crackled at their reaction as Lobo deadpanned and Alazia tilted her head as to why they would find that revolting description appealing.
Charlie rubbed her nose as she turned to Vaggie "Pitch that idea to Verosika and see what she can do with that." Charlie said as Vaggie nods.
As she was about to speak Charlie's phone rings as she fishes her phone from her pocket and notices it was a call from her dad. "Hold that thought! I'll be right back." She said as she walked away. Charlie breathes nervously and answers the call.
"Hello? Dad?"
–Back with the group–
"Hey, I have a question. If freaky face over there is so powerful, then why can't she just make people stay here?" Angel Dust said."
Alazia teleports next to Angel Dust "Oh trust me,-" She said as she smiles in a mischievously creepy look with dark magic floating around her. "-I can."
"Why do you think I'm here?" Husker said as the camera moved to Husk at the bar. "You actually think I'd be cleaning bottles and listening to you fucks bitch and moan all the time if she wasn't forcing me?"
As Husk cleans a bottle, Niffty pops up from behind the counter with a hand raised. "I like being forced. If it is with Lobo." She said as she giggled crazily. Husk rolled his eyes "Keep that to yourself, Niff." Husker said.
"What? You don't love being here with me, Whiskers?" Angel said pretending to be hurt as Husker glares at Angel "Call me Whiskers again and I'll jam that bottle down your throat." Husk said as he pointed the bottle at Angel.
"Kinky. Come on, keep talking dirty." Angel said as he motioned Husk to keep talking. Lobo sighs "Angel. Let Husk do his job. And, no, we can't force sinners to stay here. They need to choose to come on their own without outside influence." Lobo said as Vaggie smiled and nodded.
Angel rolls his eyes and crosses his arms "I'm choosing to be here and I think it's all stupid. We're in hell, Big Dog. That's kind of the end of the road for us sinners, ain't it?" Angel said.
"Well, Maybe it doesn't have to be. Just because nobody has made it out before doesn't mean it's not possible." Vaggie said as Angel Dust places a hand on her shoulder, giving her a deadpan expression while the latter makes the same one.
"Hey, whatever means I can keep crashing here rent-free. Crack is expensive." Angel said.
The scene pans over back to Charlie who seemed really happy with the news her father brought to her. "Yeah, I can totally, yeah. I'll head over there right away. Okay? I won't let you down dad." Charlie hangs up the phone and gasps in excitement.
"Yes…YES!" Charlie giggles in excitement when she hears about the news until she calls Lobo and Vaggie in gibberish, waving very frantically that freaks Lobo and Vaggie out a little. "Lobo! Vaggie! Holy, shit!"
"Ah! what?" Vaggie said as Lobo raised an eyebrow as Charlie waves for them to come to her for some exciting news.
Charlie mumbled excitedly "Get over here you twos." Vaggie sighs happily while Lobo chuckles as two comes to Charlie while she is jumping around in a very happy mode. As Angel Dust drinks in the background, Lobo and Vaggie meet Charlie.
"Alright Charlie what's going on? What got you so worked up now?" Lobo asked.
Charlie breathes in and out to calm her nerves so she can explain, but she was explaining so fast due to her excitement. "My dad just called, he said that the leader of the Angel Army wants to meet. He asked if I could go instead. Uh Lobo, you think you can come with me?" Charlie hyperventilates and grabs Lobo and Vaggie to get up close.
Vaggie, however, was confused since the Angels were already done with their extermination and won't be back for another year. "But-but, the extermination just happened. What could they want this soon after-" As Vaggie went on, Charlie was in the mood to get her hotel project to work, and remained hopeful that she started singing.
I can do this! Somehow, I know it! I'll get Heaven behind my plans!
"Charlie, hold on…" Lobo said.
There's just no way I could blow it. Not this once-in-a-lifetime chance!
"Charlie It's just a meeting." Vaggie said.
To change their minds And touch their hearts Or... whatever angels have!
"This could be bad…" Lobo and Vaggie said at the same time. As Charlie grabbed Lobo and Vaggie hands and twirled them around.
Cheer up, Lobo! Vaggie! This could be swell! Something tells me that today will be a happy day in Hell!
Lobo and Vaggie were disoriented as they tried to get their bearings. "Okay, but just don't... sing to them. Lobo make sure she doesn't sing to them." Vaggie said as Lobo nods.
Just before Vaggie could say another word, Angel Dust, Alazia, Niffty, and Keekee were already at the door where they can see Charlie singing out in the destroyed Pentagram City, as Angel Dust turns back to Lobo and Vaggie as he is still drinking from a bottle. "That bitch is halfway down the street!" Angel said.
"Is she doing what I think she is doing?" Lobo said as he deadpans as Angel chuckles "Oh, she's dancin'!"
Vaggie rubs her forehead "Ugh, no…"
The scene cuts to Charlie making her way down the street, oblivious to the destruction and bodies of dead demons everywhere as she continues to sing her song. "There's a warm, fuzzy feeling. That wafts through the air. Every street is so revealing. It's hard not to stare!"
Charlie comes to a window of a sex dungeon where a Hellhound is humping against an imp wearing a sadomasochism mask. They notice her, and Charlie awkwardly flees before continuing to sing.
"It's a realm so appealing it beats anywhеre. If you don't mind the smell…"
Charlie accidentally steps on a dead shark demon that was releasing a very bad smelly fume into her nose. She cautiously avoids the corpse and presses on the street.
"It's a happy day in Hell!"
Charlie waves at a demon who was holding a newspaper before she catches his attention, revealing himself to be a meth addict with a spoon full of meth. "Hi, mister!" the Demon looked at her "Go fuck yourself!" He said
One demon opens his window, revealing his apartment on fire "There's an endless trash fire that's burning my soul."
"Hello."
"And a ton of barbed wire to shove in his hole!"
"Ah, excuse me!"
"Doing what is required, we all have our role."
"I'm not doin' well!"
"Another shitty day in Hell!"
Charlie climbs on the trunk of the destroyed car and faces the other direction. "If I can show them the dream I've dreamed. That any soul can change!"
From the Hazbin Hotel, Lobo and Vaggie come onto the watchtower watching Charlie from afar before Lobo teleports next to Charlie.
"Those angels' minds are hard to change." Lobo sang.
"Then they will know everyone can be redeemed. From the evil to the strange!"
"They're bloodthirsty and deranged!" Vaggie sang.
"I can hear all their stories. The lost and displaced. And I know that they're more of an acquired taste. But! if I open the door and I give them a place. At my Hazbin Hotel. It'll be a happy day in Hell!"
A truck comes by, Lobo and Charlie hitch a ride from behind so they can get around the city such as the porn studios, and the Cannibal Town.
"From the porn studio. Where the cinephiles go. To watch award-winning demon bukkake shows! To the Cannibal Town. Where they don't wear a frown 'cause."
Charlie was almost shot in the eye with blood from one of the corpses that the cannibals were eating on. As Lobo Pulled her back as she smiled at him.
"Holy shit! Oh, my gosh! Thanks babe."
"And I don't give a crow that. His blood almost got in my eye! Cause I know I can spare them. From Heaven's genocide! "I can do this, I just know it!"
Sinner #1 "There's an endless trash fire that's burning my soul.
"I'll get Heaven behind my plans! There's just no way I could blow it."
Sinner #2 "I kinda like the barbed wire that's shoved in my hole."
"Not this once-in-a-lifetime chance! To change their minds."
Right at the moment, a slug with a trenchcoat comes into picture, exhibiting his nudist body in front of Charlie, then Lobo places his hand on her eyes to shield her from that horrifying sight.
Trench Coat Demon "And touch my parts!"
"Uh... No thank you. I'm just gonna…" Charlie said as she pulled Lobo along.
"Fulfill my destiny!
Trench Coat Demon "Your loss, bitch!
"I can already tell! Today is gonna bе a fuckin' happy day in Hell!" Charlie has gotten to right where she wants them to be, the Heaven Embassy with the watchtower. She opens the door to peek inside.
"Hello!" Charlie said as she and Lobo entered through the door and found the whole embassy deserted. They walked to the front desk to check in.
Charlie comes to the front desk with no one but a single bell. She taps the bell to ring it, and at the instant, a golden scroll and feather ink pen floats from above over to her.
"Oh, okay…" She signs it then passes it to Lobo "Also creepy."
The scroll and feather flies up before disappearing. Right then, the twin doors slide open to show Charlie the meeting room, and they enter inside the dark room with no one around.
"Uh...hello? Is anyone here?" Charlie said as Lobo tried sensing the room then he groaned "Ugh don't tell me who i think it is." Before Charlie could ask what's wrong the lights suddenly switched on, revealing two angels at the end of the room. With one being Lute and the big boss leader of the Angel Army, Adam who Lobo packed up.
"'Sup!" Adam said, scaring Charlie "Holy, shit!" Charlie almost fell down after getting surprised by the sudden appearance of two angels in the room. Lobo caught her as she thanks him before turning her attention to Adam
"Hi, I'm Charlie. My dad asked me if I could meet you." Charlie said as Adam looked unamused. "Yeah, I know."
"Okay, well." Charlie begins as Adam eats his rib like a buzzsaw. "It's nice to meet you."
"Totally. It's nice to meet you, too." Adam said sarcastically as he reached over to give Charlie a handshake, and as she was about to shake his hand, her hand slipped right through, revealing him to be a hologram, fizzing on and off after being touched, which freaked Charlie out.
"Ha! I fucking got you." turns to Lute "Did you see that?" Lute nods once. "Ha. Good shit."
Charlie was trying to get something straight with Adam being a hologram. "Uh...so, wait. You aren't here?"
"No, you think I'd come down here after the fight I had with bitch face over there?" Adam laughs as Lobo smiles, not fazed by Adam's weak argument "No, I mean, I love the vibe, totally, I love your tunes. Pretty fucking hardcore, don't get me wrong. But! It's such a bummer! man. Everything down here just so "eugh", ya know?" chuckles "Ew."
"Right. So, I'm happy we've got this opportunity to meet. There's a project that I've been working on that I really want to talk to you about-" Adam puts his finger on Charlie's lips to quiet her down for a moment. Lobo growls at the disrespect Adam is showing to Charlie.
"Hey, hey, hey, hey, slow down. We've got time. How about we get to know each other a little. Mmm. How about lunch? Are you hungry? I got you." Adam takes a plate of ribs he's been eating toward Charlie. "Here's my personal favorite. You'll love it."
"Uh...thanks." Charlie said as she went to take a piece of a rib, but Lobo grabbed her hand. "Remember Charlie they are just holograms they are not here." He said as he swiped his hand at the plate as his paw passed right through them, also revealing to be a hologram, as they fizz on and off from the touch.
"Ah you fucking bitch why did ruined the surprise. I was hoping she would fall for that trick you asshole." Adam said as he slammed his hand on the table which Lobo growled in anger. Charlie holds Lobo's hand and whispers to him trying to calm him down.
-Back to the Hotel-
The scene cuts back to the Hazbin Hotel, where the workers and residents are summoned by Vaggie to discuss their poorly misleading commercial. Angel Dust is constantly looking at Husk with a seductive gaze while Husk is glaring daggers at him.
"Okay, so Charlie and Lobo are dealing with something very important, so while they are gone, we are making a new commercial. One that represents her vision and what we're doing here. So, we need a camera." Turning to Alazia "Alazia?"
Alazia snaps a finger to conjure up a camera for Vaggie; however, the camera is a folding-type old camera from the 1930s with no recording films at that time. Vaggie is unamused. "A video camera?"
"Hmmm." Despite her extreme distaste for modern technology, Alazia adheres to Vaggie's request and snaps her finger again, conjuring up a video camera that's poorly used with pieces of tape stuck together.
"Alright people! Let's do this!" The scene switched into the camera point of view recording the bar scene with Husk behind the counter reading a script in his claws with Angel Dust at the opposite counter. The camera whirrs back to get a better focus of the two. "And…Action!" Vaggie said
Husk carefully reads the lines on his script, bringing the script closer to read. "Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Can I help with anything?" Angel lays on the counter "I've been a bad boy, and I need a big, strong daddy to put me in my place…on the path to redemption!"
Husk groans with displeasure and reads the script again. "Well, you come—" Husk was cut off as Angel Dust moaned "Oh, yes!" Husk eyes twitch "to the right place."
Vaggie has had it, and stops recording. "Cut! Okay, Angel, I need you to be less horny if possible, and Husk, can you maybe not have a script in front of your face."
"I ain't no actor! I can't memorize this shit!" Husk said anger
"Well, we could improv this shit, baby cakes." Angel said as he gets closer to Husk's face "Rrawwr." He purrs seductively. Husk gets irritated by Angel Dust and shoves him out of the counter painfully hard. "Whoops." Husk grabs a bottle and drinks it.
"Husk, come on." Vaggie said as she palms her face. This was going nowhere.
-Back with Charlie and Lobo-
Cutting back to Charlie's meeting with Adam, she looked bored, propping herself on her elbows while listening to Adam exaggeratingly boasting himself and his sex life. Lobo tuned him out as he takes a nap.
"So, I was playin' this gig, and for some fuckin' reason, this virtue chick was diggin' on the drummer, and it's like, "do you know who I am? I'm fuckin' Adam. I'm the original dick!" pointing to his penis down the table "All dicks descend from me. You think you want drummer dick?" Lute shaking her head "No way! I'm the Dick-fuckin' master!" eats a mouthful of ribs sloppily "So, anyway, then we fucked, and it was awesome. What'd you do this weekend?"
"Wait, your name is Adam? Like the first man Adam, that means you…Oh…." Charlie puts the pieces together, realizing this is the reason why her mother left him, making her wince. "That explains so much."
"I know. I fucking rock." Adam said as he held a rock pose. Charlie brushes off the awkwardness from Adam and gets to her subject of matter in hand.
"Well, Adam, sir. Mr. Adam, sir." Charlie said
"Call me, Dickmaster." Adam said.
Lobo snorts "More like Cuckmaster to me." Lobo said chuckling as Adam gained a tick mark. Lute had to bite her lips from laughing as Charlie reprimanded Lobo but was smiling as she turned back to Adam.
"Adam. You seem like a smart" (paused) "well, stand up guy." Charlie said as she saw Adam picking his teeth "Uh-huh."
"And I know you are the leader of the angels. And you are a big thinker, a revolutionary. A— A genius!"
'I mean, your words, babe." Adam said as he felt his ego grow.
"Who would really love to put his name on something." Charlie said
"Fucking love putting my name on shit! Shit's the best!" Adam said smiling.
"It's a solution to our biggest problem!" Charlie said.
"Oh, Herpes. Yeah, that's a bitch." Adam said.
"You must be talking from experience huh Adam." Lobo said with a smirk as Adam growled.
"No! Our... other biggest problem." Charlie said, trying to divert them from fighting again.
"Oh…uh..ugly people? Math? Global Warming? Nah, wait, that's Earth's problem." Adam said.
Lobo and Charlie stare at Adam with deadpan annoyance at how ignorant he is.
"Ummm…"
-Back to Hazbin Hotel-
Cuts back to the hotel. Niffty tries to stab a bug. "Stab! Stab! Stab!" She tries to stab the bug, but misses, and starts stabbing the bug multiple times before Vaggie stops her
"Alright Niffty! Your line is "We have the cleanest rooms", okay?" Vaggie said as Niffty nods her head. "Got it. I'm ready."
Vaggie turns the camera to Niffty. "And. Action!" Upon saying action, instead of saying the line, Niffty freezes and stares blankly at the camera without a breath or blinking from the scene. Vaggie panels away, looking puzzled. Angel also peers in. Close up on Niffty making a blank stare with an ominous shrinking pupil. Angel slowly backs away, already creeped out.
"Uhh, cut." Vaggie said as Niffty snaps out of it and back to her cheerful self "(giggles) How was that?" Niffty asked.
"Well, Niffty you actually have to say the line, so let's roll again." Vaggie said as Niffty nods her head "Ok!"
Vaggie held the camera back up "Action!" Niffty freezes again, leaving Vaggie irritated, as Angel comes close to her face.
"You're doing great, Vagina." Angel whisper with a smirk.
"Cut! Alright, uhh maybe we can try to fix it in post." Vaggie said irritated.
"Do you even know what that means?" Angel asked.
"I'll figure it out!" Vaggie said. The next scene cuts to a dark room with Vaggie sitting in front of a broken TV, watching the poorly edited shots of the commercial. She groans with frustration before Alazia enters the room.
"Seems like you're having a bit of a trouble there, hmm?" Alazia said amusingly.
Vaggie groans "Ugh, esta pendeja 'this asshole'... Why are you even here Alazia?
Alazia takes a seat on a couch next to her. "For entertainment." Alazia said as her shadow slips out of her form before reappearing behind the couch, making laughing gestures. "I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful and (shadow disappears) fail spectacularly, like you are doing now. Good job!"
Vaggie was getting ticked off by Alazia and her carefree insults, stands up and turns the camera toward her. Vaggie points the camera to Alazia "And here is Alazia, the egocentric piece of shit that—"
As Vaggie was viewing the camera scene up to Alazia's face, the video camera glitches violently from green to red and Vaggie freaks out, dropping the static camera on the floor. "UGH!"
"I wouldn't try that, my dear." pointing to her face. "This face was made for radio." As Alazia explains, her pupils turn into the shape of radio dials, and the scene goes nearly static before fixing itself back to normal on Vaggie. She has had it with Alazia insults and walks up to her.
"That's it. I don't care who or what you are. If you're staying here, you're going to make this work, because it won't be so (imitating Alazia's voice) "entertaining" (back to normal voice) to watch over an empty hotel, will it, shitass?" As Vaggie returns to her chair
Alazia approaches her "Fair enough. I'll tell you what. Let's make a deal." Alazia said.
"Pfft, you think I'm that stupid making a deal with a demon like you?" Vaggie said.
"Not for your soul, just a simple deal. I do this for you, and you never ask me to engage with this frivolous television technology ever again." Alazia said.
Vaggie had second thoughts of letting Alazia do the work for her.
"Or…Charlie and Lobo can come back to absolutely nothing. Your choice."
Vaggie glances away for a brief moment before making her decision Vaggie *sighs* "Fine."
Vaggie picks up the camera and gives it to Alazia, which she evaporates with a clap of her hand.
"Now then!" Alazia snaps her finger and transforms the hotel into a film set with the hotel staff into a 50s style film crew. Ink demons conjure up as additional background characters.
"Alright everyone, let's make a fucking commercial." Vaggie said wanting to show her worth to her two most important people.
-Back With Charlie and Lobo-
Cuts to Charlie and Lobo looking exasperated with another of Adam's sexist rants of women and his masculinity.
"When you take her out for the fifth time and she still expects you to pay the check but you're like, (high pitched-voice) "Hey, I thought you wanted equality."
Charlie gained a tick mark as she had enough "NO! our shared problem of overpopulation in Hell!" Charlie said.
'Ohh, well that's not a problem! We got that covered! (turning to Lute who stood at attention) Lute, how many demons did you kill this year?"
"Got a good 275 this year, sir." Lute said.
"275? Woah! Badass! Awesome job, danger tits! Pound it." Adam raises a fist for Lute to make a fist-bump, which she did.
"Uh no, not awesome. Those are my people, you know that right?" Charlie said.
"Oh yeah. That must suck for you!" Adam said as he bursts into laughter
"Keep laughing cuck but remember who the one that bodied your exorcist and fucked your shit up. Hmm." Lobo said.
Adam points a finger at Lobo as he fell into the trap Lobo set up "Fuck you you caught me be surprised and I didn't go all out asshole. I would've won." Adam said.
"But these are souls...Humans souls just the same as the ones you have up in heaven." Charlie said.
"They're not the same. They had their chance and they earned damnation." Lute said as Lobo shakes his head. He knew Adam programmed these womens to hate the sinners.
"You're wrong. Sinners make mistakes, sure, but everyone makes mistakes." Charlie said.
"Angels don't make mistakes." Lute said.
"You really think that." Charlie said.
"I know that." Lute said.
"Yeah, I've never made a mistake in my fuckin' life." Adam said.
"I don't know man getting cucked twice seems like a mistake to me cuckmaster. Tell me how Abel and Cain are doing. Oh my bad touchy subject." Lobo said as Adam snarls at him.
As Lute comes around the table, the scene turns slightly darker with ominous red. "The only reason you're still here is because daddy gave you and your hellborn kind a pardon from an exorcist blade. How does that feel, to know how little you matter?"
"Oops, almost out of time. Guess we should get into it." Adam said.
Charlie eyes widen "Oh fuck!" Charlie rushes to present her plan as fast as she can.
"Okay I've got a lot to get through and not a lot of time and I feel like you weren't hearing me before so here it goes." Charlie coughs as she starts making a fast-talk, which is close to singing as she gets the stuff out on the table to show them what she means.
"I know Hell's population is out of control. It's a bad situation. It's taking a toll. If we rehab these Sinners. And cleanse all their souls. At my Hazbin Hotel." Charlie rambles through the stacks of paper to get something.
"Wait, I'm getting ahead of myself!" Charlie said.
"Right! Extermination! I know you guys fly down. Just to kill once a year. And it must be annoying. To schlep all the way here. If they join you in Heaven. That trip disappears! You can wave that chore farewell. (deep breath) It'll be a happy day in" Charlie sang before getting cutoff.
"Let me stop you right there." Save us all precious time. If what you're suggesting. Is letting them climb. Up the ladder. Oh, they'd rather cross the Pearly Gates?" Adam sang.
"Well, uh—" Charlie said.
"Sorry, sweetie. But there's no defyin' their fates! 'Cause Hell is forever. Whether you like it or not. Had their chance to behave better. Now they boil in the pot. 'Cause the rules are black and white. There's no use in tryin' to fight it. They're burnin' for their lives. Until we kill 'em again!"
"Okay, but—"
"Just try to chillax, babe. You're wasting your breath. Did I hear you imply? That they don't deserve death? Are they Winners? Are they Sinners? 'Cause it's cut and dry."
"Well, actually, if you take a look," Charlie said.
"Fair is fair, an eye for an eye! And when all's said and done (Said and done) There's the question of fun (Fun) And for those of us with Divine Ordainment. Extermination is entertainment! Bow-now-now-nownow. Guitar solo, fuck yeah! (Adam sings guitar solo)"
Lobo picked up Charlie after being knocked down by Adam."Ugh…"
"Hell is forever. Whether you like it or not. Had their chance to behave better."
Eight golden mirages of Exorcists appear, surrounding Lobo and Charlie from all sides. "Where the hell did you people come from?!" Charlie asked.
"Now they boil in the pot. 'Cause the rules are black and white. There's no use in tryin' to fight it. They're burnin' for their lives. Until we kill 'em again! Fuckin' Hell's forever. And it's meant to suck a lot. So give up your dumb endeavor. 'Cause you don't have a shot!"
Charlie gets so angry that she turns into her demon form, making growling noise as she burns her papers. Lobo notices this and feels anger towards Adam.
"Long as I've got your attention. I guess I should probably mention. That we made the determination. To move up the next Extermination!'
"What?!" Both Lobo and Charlie shouted.
"Can't wait a whole year. To slaughter those little cunts. I know it's just been a week. But we'll be back in six months!
Despite being a hologram, Adam grabs Charlie and Lobo throws them right out of the door.
"Um, wait, you-you— Ugh, SHIT!" Before Charlie tries to get to Adam, the door closes while he continues to do a guitar solo shredding. Defeated, Charlie slams a fist on the door.
Lobo gets up as he notices Charlie shoulder shaking as he can hear her sobs. Lobo walked up to her as she turned and hugged him as she started crying. "I screwed up Lobo. I-" Charlie chokes on her words. "I'm sorry I made the Extermination move up to be Six months from now. If I didn't sing to them maybe-" Charlie said before Lobo cuts her off by lifting her face.
Lobo's heart clenched at her sorrowful face as he wiped the tears with his thumbs. "Listen to Mi Amor 'My Love' Adam was being an asshole before you started to sing. And besides, we still have six months to find a way to do this." Lobo said as he pulled her close as Charlie smiles and kisses him.
"Can you teleport us back to the hotel babe." Charlie asks as Lobo nods and teleports them back to the hotel. As the two return to the hotel. Vaggie runs up and hugs them "Lobo! Charlie! How did it go, did they listen?" Vaggie asked.
Charlie winced "Oh, they sure did hear it But-" Vaggie cuts her off as she dragged them both "Oh come here, we have something exciting to show you both." Vaggie said as she led them to the group as she sat Charlie in the middle of the couch with her and Lobo on her side.
"Alazia pulled some strings and it's about to air." Vaggie said as Alazia chuckles "I pulled a few limbs too, hahaha!" Alazia said.
"Wait, the commercial? You all made a new one?" Lobo asked as Charlie brightened up.
"Yeah, one of my better performances if I do say so myself." Angel said, looking proud.
Charlie beams brightly "That's... that's amazing."
Angel Dust shushes her "Sshh, it's starting."
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel - Vaggie said before the TV cuts to the News report. The group except Alazia and Niffty get annoyed and angrily complain.
"Breaking news in Hell today! We have just received word from the Heaven Embassy that the next Extermination is happening sooner than ever before. Do you know what that means, Tom?" Katie said.
"No, what does that mean, Katie?" Tom said.
"It means we're all royally fucked!" Katie said as her eye twitched. Screaming can be heard from Sinners as the time on the Clock Tower reduces to 176 days till the next Extermination.
'Wait, what? Why?!" Angel said as Lobo and Charlie looked at each other with a frown.
A drone scouts an area until it finds a dead Exorcist corpse with its head missing. The drone scans the corpse.
"Is this the one that Lobo had killed?" Adam asked Lute as she shook her head.
"Negative sir we found this body away from we fought Lobo. This was one killed by an angelic weapon. Sir it seems someone is using our weapons against us. We should just go down there now and destroy them!" Lute said.
"No, no. We can't risk them catching on. But, don't worry, when we come back, there won't be a demon left alive to pull a stunt like this again!" Adam said as he destroyed the projector, causing its light to disappear only showing Adam's glowing evil smile.
-Couple days later-
Charlie pacing back and forth in panic mode. Keekee was in the shot, walking alongside her owner.
"Okay. So the extermination is coming in six months instead of a year. No big deal. Just a little setback. Nothing we can't handle. Just angels cutting our timetable in half. But who needs a whole year to save souls? Am I right?! [Starts to panic.] And next time when they cut the time in half again, and again, we'll just handle it, right?!"
Lobo grabs Charlie, calming her down. "Yes. We will. Right Vaggie?" Lobo said as Vaggie nods.
Angel interrupts them "Oh, please, ya had less than half a chance when you started all this salvation bullshit. And now… (phone vibrates with violent threating messages such as "fucking bitch") Ain't no silver lining this time toots."
"Sure there is! We just...have to look a little harder for it!" Charlie said.
"Well, while you're lookin', the rest'a hell's goin' nuts." Angel waves his phone in their faces. "People are already freakin' out about the news. Look at what's happenin' in the Doomsday District." He scrolls down an article with the bottom showing a demon screaming in front of a fire. Suddenly a pink message appears. Charlie gets closer to read it.
"Err, what is a...Donkey Show?" Charlie asks as Angel panics and retreats the phone back. "Aah, heh, nothin'. My boss, Val, is just freaked out about the news too. Like I said, everyone's losin' their shit." Angel said hoping she buys it but Lobo caught on and shook his head.
"Yeah, that's true. Sinners are desperate. Maybe desperate enough to try anything to escape the extermination?" Vaggie said.
Charlie gasps "This is the perfect time to recruit more sinners for the hotel!" Charlie said, getting starry-eyed.
"Cute idea and all, but you really gonna go out in all of this?" Angel said as he waves the phone with the place still on fire and demons in panic.
"Well, it's not like people are just gonna show up on our doorstep" Charlie said before she was cutoffed as a massive explosion made Charlie scream in fright from behind, getting their attention.
They turn to see a freshly made hole in the wall, then cut to outside to see Madame Pentious zeppelin armed for battle. The scene cuts inside to see her and the Egg Boiz scattering around.
"Show yourself Alazia. Come and face" Pentious pauses for a moment when she notices Alazia absent from the freshly made hole. She then looks to see her sipping coffee on the balcony of the second floor. "Oh there you are - Face my wrath!" Madame Pentious yelled.
Alazia tilts her head "Who are you?" She asked.
"Who am I? Who am I?! I am the great Madame Pentiousssss!" Madame Pentious said as Alazia dissolves into fog as she descends to the ground, materializing aside Angel, Vaggie, Lobo and Charlie who are in the scene watching Madame Pentious's zeppelin.
"Inventor, architect of dessstruction, villain extraordinaire" Madame Pentious said as one the Egg Bois walked over "Ooh you tell 'em boss lady."
Niffty appears on Alazia's right shoulder, clearly unamused "Great another woman" Niffty said as Alazia scoops Niffty up and drops her to the ground. "Ha, well if all that's true, you'd think I'd have heard of you." Alazia said.
"I attacked you literally last week, remember." Madame Pentious said as Alazia cocks her head.
Madame Pentious gained a tick mark. "We've fought like... 20 times."
"Well, you must have been really bad at this." Alazia said as Madame Pentious had enough "Silence! Now cower! For when I've ssslain you, the almighty Vees will finally acknowledge me as their equal."
Niffty reappears on Alazia's shoulder again "Ooh! Wait, who are the Vees?" She said trying to remember as Alazia pats Niffty head "Oh, nobody important my dear." Alazia said.
-Vees Headquarters-
A large crowd is in front of a store as they watch an advertisement on the tvs facing the window showing off a spy drone.
Ad: New VoxTek designer voyeur scopes, Peeping on the neighbors has never been more stylish. VoxTek! Trust us with your money!*
Crowd immediately enters the store and stampedes out with boxes with voyeur scopes. then cuts to random people watching their computers laptops and phones, and reveals their eyes signifying the work of hypnosis.
Ad: This week's episode of "Yeah, I Fucked Your Sister, So What?" is brought to you by VoxTek. Trust us with your entertainment!*
Shifts to Vox tapping his fingers as we enter a large room with tvs showing off numerous consumers as "trust us" repeats and overlaps. electricity courses as Vox stands up from his chair laughing maniacally from his viewer's consumerism.
"Muhahaha! Now that's good television!" Vox laughed as suddenly his screen-face shifts to reveal an icon of Velvette, another one of them Vees, signifying she's calling, with a clown horn ringtone. Vox courses the call from his screen to his hands via his electric powers and transfers it to one of his many screens to reveal Velvette in her studio, her hair into a large ponytail. Vox then sits down on his chair.
"Hello there, Velvette! How are you this hellish morning?" Vox asked
"Oh, cut the shit, Vox. I need you up here now!" Velvette said as Vox looks to one of his screens as he gets his coffee cup and drinks from it.
"Whatever could be the problem, my dear?" Vox said before Velvette sneers at him "Your little boy toy is wrecking my department, while I'm trying to pull together a show for my boyfriend-" Velvette said off-screen as he see several workers running and screaming, and objects being tossed, as Valentino is heard cursing.
Valentino screamed in the background "FUCKING BITCH!"
"Just get your ass here, NOW! ...Damn it, Valentino!" The call ends, and Vox's smile fades away as he gets up, sighing, fixing up his bowtie. "Oh god. Here I go, Valentino.' Just another fucking day with Val. Hey-hey-hey. Fuck my life." Vox then walks up to a platform, which rises up.
Cut to an elevator with a smiling Vox with the world bubble saying "trust us!", before opening to reveal a frowning Vox in the same position, sighing, and then putting on a smile for a crowd of reporters that overlap one another before pointing their microphones to him.
"Mr. Vox! What are your thoughts about the new extermination deadline?" One of the reporters asked.
"My dear people! We at VoxTek Enterprises have always been at the forefront of innovation. And now, with this new oncoming threat, we are shifting our focus, to your protection. We are pleased to announce-"
The screen zooms to him and an ad featuring the VoxTek logo, now gold and with angelic wings, with the tagline reading-
"VoxTek Angelic Security is coming soon! Trust us, with YOUR safety." Vox uses his left eye to hypnotize the crowd the same way as his consumers.
"Uh sir, when did we begin working on Angelic Security?" One of Vox managers asked.
"Thirty seconds ago." Vox said as he walks off "Try to get that bitch Carmilla on the books and cancel all my appointments today. I have a fire to put out upstairs."
He then morphs his body into electricity and generates itself into the security camera on the wall.
Cutting to Velvette's studio. The staff cleans everything up as she looks to four designers holding up dresses to show her
"Ugh. No. Unacceptable. You're fired. What is this? WRIST RUFFLES?! Is this 1750?! BURN IT like the witches who wore it!" As she sends the designer away, Vox appears next to her.
"Velvette! I can see you're busy. Tell me, where's our hot-headed friend now?" Vox asked.
"Up in his tower, waiting for a flat-faced prince to calm him down!" Velvette said as Vox sighs "And uh, what's got him so out of sorts today?" Vox asked.
"Who knows? But he tore up my best model! And you know, the show can't wait for that unlucky bitch to pull herself back together! Melissa! Get over here!" Melissa nervously runs onto the platform, and Velvette uses her overlord powers to change her outfit by swiping her hand, one after another until she spots the one she wants. "No. No. Hideous. I want to die. Eww. (gasp) Yes! That's the one." Velvette said.
"Ahh, looks like you have everything under control here." Vox chuckles.
"Of course, I do! Fuck you! (flips him off) Now shoo! Take care of the piss baby!" Velvette said, trying to get the show ready for her boyfriend.
Vox shook his head as he pondered on what Velvette saw in that guy. Vox goes upstairs and is greeted by two moth demons who open the door for him. Once he enters. he finds Valentino sitting on his couch surrounded by a fog of red smoke. When Val notices Vox, he sits up with fury in his eyes.
"Fucking FINALLY! [throws drink] Kitty! Another drink!" Valentino exclaimed.
The Robo Fizzie next to him nods as it quickly heads off screen and reappears with the drink.
"Ugh! Can you believe what that piece of shit did? THE UNGRATEFUL WHORE!!!" Valentino screamed.
As he speaks, he tosses the drink at Vox, who moves away making the drink, hits the door, and shatters on the floor.
"Uh, which whore are we talking about this time?" Vox asked.
Valentino gets up "Fucking Angel Dust!" walks up to him "Who the hell else would I be talking about?!" walks past him "That fucking SLUT walked out on me! "turns to Vox "ME! I fucking made him!" Vox walks a little way away "Without me, he's just a bag of meat with some mildly entertaining holes."
"Oh! Angel quit?" Vox asked uncaringly.
"NO! He didn't fucking quit! It's worse!" He takes Vox's phone "He MOVED!!!" As he says that, he tosses Vox's phone to the wall making it shatter in half.
"He thinks he can just walk in here, work, and then go home somewhere else? Can you FUCKING believe that?!" walks to the closet "He thinks he can run off and shack up with Lucifer's bimbo daughter and her mangy mutt boyfriend!"
"Angel is... living with Charlie and Lobo? Also don't let Velvette hear you say that or she'll rip you a new one ." Vox question.
"Like I give a shit. That BITCH and the other BITCH she's got this hotel and" As he speaks, he opens the closet full of guns, drugs, and pictures including a poster of himself. Valentino brings up two long pistol guns: a long revolver and a semi-pistol.
"Which of these makes me look sexier?" Valentino said as he turned to the closet.
"Heh. What are you doing, Val? You're not going over there. You know Velvs is going to flay you if you touch her boytoy." Vox said as he speaks, his left eye changes to show his simmering anger, but Valentino is busy loading his guns.
"That slippery twink is gonna remember who owns him. I'm gonna FUCK everyone in that rancid shit hole, I swear to god!" Before he finishes, Vox grabs him by the collar and shoves him to his face, clearly furious.
Vox's voice distorted "VAL-" then he calmed down "Hehe. Think about it." Vox then walks Valentino towards the window, taking away one of his guns and putting it in his pocket. "Our brand is perfection. And what do you think chasing whores around town will do for our image?"
Valentino thinks "Uh...fuck it up?" He said as a stereotypical 'winning' ding is played.
Vox nods "Right! Do you want people thinking you can't control your employees?" Vox said as Valentino shook his head "No!"
"Exactly! And hey, you still have him under contract. He isn't going anywhere! SO...you should…" letting Valentino catch on "Do nothing?" as a sound like winning at a casino is played.
"Great idea! Now that's why they pay you the" pinches Valentino cheek "Big bucks."
Valentino pouts "Ugh. But I really wanted to shoot someone." As he speaks, Valentino gets a cigarette holder, and Vox lights it with his electricity powers.
"Well, lemme call up the lowest earners this month." Vox said as he walked to the TV's.
"Ohh, you know me too well." Valentino chuckles and blows smoke "Ya know...Angel isn't the only one spending time at this Ratty Hotel with the devil's princesa and her perro."
"Oh? Who else is there? Someone who owes you money?" Vox asked.
Valentino chuckles, "Someone who owes us much more than money ...the Radio Demon bitch is there."
Upon hearing those words, electricity courses through Vox's head, and he scratches the desk so hard it leaves scratch marks. Vox made small ominous chuckles before turning to Valentino, two red lines appearing on the left side of his lower lip.
"What did you just say?" Vox said as his voice distorted.
"You heard me." Valentino said.
"Alazia" Vox walks to him "came back...and she is with Lucifer's *glitches* daughter, and that wasn't the" grabs him by the collar "FIRST FUCKING THING YOU TOLD ME?!?!?!"
Valentino frees himself from grip "Hey! killing Alazia is your kink." Valentino said as he walked to the desk and turned on the television. Vox teleports to the center screen, which is a recording from a VoxTek Voyeur scope high in the sky. The scene, from a drone point of view, shows Alazia using her powers to attack Madame Pentious zeppelin, laughing maniacally as she hears Pentious screaming.
"Arrgh! Oh! Please! Stop!" Madame Pentious begged.
"Um...Alazia! I think she's had enough." Charlie said.
"Nah. She's got a few more hits in her." Angel Dust said.
Madame Pentious falls from the zeppelin in front of Alazia, face first on the ground. Alazia twirls her staff "Thanks for another forgettable experience." Alazia said as she turned around.
An Egg Boi falls and breaks into pieces in front of Charlie. "Thank you... for letting your guard down!" Madame Pentious said using her tail, she grabs a bit of Alazia's suit and tears it off. "Aha! Yah! Oh, shit…"
Madame Pentious looks up to see Alazia's shadow transform in front of her and Alazia apparently makes an elk bugle. The next shot shows a massive green explosion as Madame Pentious is seen flying off to the city screaming as she disappears from sight. "Madame Pentious blasting off again" as a twinkle shined.
"Well, it looks as though I need a visit to the tailor! Best of luck, chums." Alazia said before Vaggie stops her "Wait, you're leaving?! Alazia! We need your help! We need you to do your job."
Lobo gestures to the hole on the wall "We need a wall."
"Of course! Can't let my new project fall into disrepair already. What would the papers say?!" Alazia said.
With a snap of her fingers, black ink demons appear with construction tools as Alazia walks away. Angel takes an interest and looks at one of the larger muscular demons, shoving Vaggie away as he walks up to him.
Angel Dust giggles "Hey, sweet cheeks. Whatcha doin' later? I love a man with a giant ...tool." Angel said as Lobo and Vaggie looked unamused at his flirting while Charlie giggles.
The screen zooms out to reveal Valentino scowling at the current events, leaning his face against the screen.
"See?! Look how he flirts with that guy, and he's not even paying! Who is that? I'm gonna fucking kill his whole fucking family! Vox?" slams his fist on the table "VOX!"
Vox was paying little attention, as his left pupil turns into a tilde as he eyes Alazia leaving, her appearance static and out of focus as the screen becomes a bit static.
"That fucking stupid bitch is back!" Vox yells.
Valentino grins as he realizes the situation and walks to him "Yeah! I thought she was gone for good too!" Valentino said.
"It's been four years since that bitch has been gone!" Vox said as Valentino leans up to him and pinches his cheek, Vox clearly pissed to care.
"You're still pissed that she almost beat you that time?" Valentino said amusingly.
"Uh, FUCK YOU." Vox said, pissed.
"Just saying." Valentino walks around him as Vox rages "Things have changed a lot since she left town!" Vox said.
"THAT'S for sure." Valentino said.
"I gotta send a message of who's REALLY in charge of things now!" Vox's face fills the screen as Valentino laughs in the background. The next shot shows Vox grinning as he marches to his chair.
"Welcome home! I'm gonna make you wish that you stayed gone!"
As Vox sang, electricity courses through his arm as he sits on his chair, and turns to face the numerous screens.
"Say hello to a new status quo"
Vox presses a big red button, and 4 cords latch themselves to the ports on the back of his head, connecting himself to his TV networks.
"Everyone knows that there's a brand-new dawn, turn the TV on!"
"Camera, speeds, rolling in three, two…" The director said.
Chorus: "Wel-come to the show!"
"Top of the hour and we're discussing a certain has-been who has been spotted cavorting around town after a four-year absence, Did anybody miss her, did anybody notice? More on tonight's program. So, the Radio Demon is back in town! Why is she hanging around? What does that mean for your family? Well, handily, I've got good news! She's a loser, a fossil, and I don't mean to sound hostile."
Vox Chorus: "But the demon is a coward!"
"You can take that as gospel. Pulling my viewers? Impossible! I'm visual, she's barely audible! Stop giving her the time of day! Don't listen to a word she'd say. I hope she had a nice vacay!"
Vox Chorus: "But she should have stayed away!"
Cut to Alazia who had just finished getting her coat tailored. She notices the crowd watching the advertisement of Vox. She smiles and walks away with an idea as Vox continues singing.
"While she hid on the radio, we pivoted to video!" pulls out an uncooked bloodied deer head from an oven caked in blood "Now her medium is getting bloody rare!"
In a hallway in V Tower, Vox jumps, twirls and then pulls Valentino and Velvette towards him. Valentino smiles while Velvette looks annoyed.
"Hell's been better since she split, Where's she been? Who gives a shit?!"
Cuts to Alazia making her reappearance, as she starts his radio broadcast from a radio station attached to the top corner of the Hazbin Hotel.
Alazia- "Salutations! Good to be back on the air. Yes, I know it's been a while since someone with style treated Hell to a broadcast. Sinners rejoice!"
Vox- "What a dated voice!"
Alazia "Instead of a clout chasing mediocre video podcast."
"COME ON!" Vox screamed.
Alazia- "Is Vox insecure, pursuing allure? Flitting between this fad and that. Is nothing working?"
"IGNORE HER CHIRPING!" Vox said.
Alazia "Every day he's got a new format!"
"YOU'RE LOOKING AT THE FUTURE!" Vox said.
Vox and Chorus: "She's the shit that comes before that!"
Alazia- "Is Vox as strong as he purports? Or is it based on his support? He'd be powerless without the other Vees!"
"Oh, PLEASE." Vox said.
Alazia- "And here's the sugar on the cream. He asked ME to join this team!"
"Hold on!" Vox said.
Alazia- "I said no, and now he's pissy! That's the tea."
As Alazia continues with her radio broadcast, Vox gets so pissed that his screen face starts to glitch and crash as he gets angrier.
Vox glitches "You oold timey BITCH! I'll show y-you suffering!"
Alazia "Uh oh, the TV is buffering!"
Vox couldn't handle his anger, causing him to overload his circuits with static electricity.
Vox- "I'LL DESTROY YOOOOU-YOU LIT-T-LE-"
Vox's screen face and voice overloads and crashes, before Vox involuntarily lets out an outburst that overloads everything from the TV screens to Valentino and Velvette's phone to everywhere in Pentagram City, causing a citywide blackout with the exception of the Hazbin Hotel.
Alazia "afraid you've lost your signal.
The camera zooms in on the hotel, and then zooms into Alazia's radio station.
"Let's begin."
Alazia slowly turns into her true demon form with every sentence.
"I'm gonna make you wish that I stayed gone!
Alazia puts down her staff for the first time.
"Tune on in. When I'm done, your status quo will know it's race is run! Oh, this will be fun!"
Alazia makes one last evil laugh before cutting off Vox's signal throughout the city, leaving the Overlord dismayed that Alazia is still as popular and powerful as she was last time.
"FUU-UU-UCK!" Vox screams before the scene cuts to the emergency meeting with Vox, Velvette, and Valentino to discuss a matter with Alazia as a Robo-Fizz, Kitty, passes out drinks to each of them.
"We have a problem. Alazia is getting close to little princess Morningstar, so our main concern now is ensuring that no deal is ever struck between Lucifer's" slams the table "BRAT and that smiling bitch!
Velvette is on her phone texting Lobo "You know if you do anything to Charlie Lobo will gut you and I won't stop him right."
Valentino was putting so much glue on his revolver to decorate with glitter and marbles. "Put something inside them. That's how I get the bitches to behave." Valentino said.
"Well, maybe someone on the inside isn't such a bad idea. Do you think Angel would?" Vox said.
Valentino crosses his arms "That lanky prick won't even return my calls."
"We need someone who Little Miss Bleeding Heart would take in." Vox said.
Velvette rolls her eyes "Yeah, No i'm not going along with your little scheme. If it was a no name shit then yeah but since it is my boyfriend and Charlie. Better find somebody else to help you." Velvette said.
"I employ every down on their luck loser this side of Hell. Who the fuck is left?" Valentino said.
Vox scoffs "I think, I have... JUST the one." As Vox slowly turns around, the sharks in the shark tank swim up to his shoulders, his right-hypnotic eye gleaming with a sinister grin for a plan he has in store.
-Back at the hotel-
Alazia's black and white demons are currently fixing the hole in the wall as Lobo, Charlie and Vaggie return. Charlie throws herself onto a couch, exhausted.
Angel Dust looked at the three and raised a brow "Soooo? How'd it go?"
Vaggie sighs "Not a single new recruit." She said.
"Yeah well, who would wanna use their last days not fucking and fighting?" As Angel checks his phone, Lobo and Vaggie hear a knock on the front door. They both look at each other and nod. They walk over to it and open the door, only to find Madame Pentious behind it, holding her hat. "Why, hello my dears-"
Madame Pentious is cut off by Vaggie punching her in the face. She falls when Vaggie brings out her spear and Lobo brings out Casull 454 and Jackal as their weapons pointing at her. Madame Pentious cowers in fear with the tip barely at her neck, and the guns aimed at her head. She held a peace sign gesture
"Wait, wait, wait! I come in peace." Madame Pentious said, a little terrified.
"What are you doing here Pentious?" Lobo asked her as Charlie appeared behind Vaggie. "Hey guys, what's the problem?" gasps "Oh! Hello again!"
"I didn't come looking for a fight. I uhh.. I heard that you're helping people, people who want to be better?" Madame Pentious said nervously.
Charlie lets out a gasp and runs over to grab her hand and leads her to the door of the hotel. Charlie gasps "You heard right! Welcome to our home of healing, our resort of restoration, our-"
Angel Dust appears from the door and cuts off Charlie. "Are you fucking nuts? This cagna *bitch* was trying to kill us like literally 6 hours ago! And now you wanna bring her in here to live with us?"
Charlie nods "Absolutely! This place is about second chances, and who deserves one more than this slithery… slippery… special woman!"
Angel Dust turns to Vaggie and Lobo "Aren't you supposed to protect this place?"
Charlie gives her lovers a puppy-dog eyes, begging them to give Madame Pentious a chance to live in the hotel. The two cave in as they can't say no to her.
Vaggie sighs "I guess she's not much of a threat without the war machine," Madame Pentious' cobra head lifts with anticipation "or even with the war machine." Madame Pentious' cobra head flaps down with depression, sighing.
"Honestly she is more like a kid wanting attention than anything else so she is practically harmless." Lobo said.
Charlie was so happy that she hugged them, lifting them up in the process and twirling around once as the two felt their backs popped.
"Oh! Thank you thank you thank you thank you! Madame Pentious! Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!" Charlie leads Madame Pentious to the door inside of the hotel.
"Oh no darling! Thank you! You won't regret this." Madame Pentious said.
Angel follows soon afterwards "Eh, I give you a week, tops."
Charlie gives Madame Pentious the tour of the hotel, introducing Husk to her, the wall she blew up before it was fixed.
"So, this is the bar and the bartender. This is the curtain, and this is the new wall after you broke the last one, heh, and oh! Oh! This is the-"
Vaggie grabs Charlie to calm her down again "Babe, you don't have to show her every detail."
Charlie gave a sheepish smile "Sorry, I'm just so excited to have our first real guest!"
Angel Dust looked offended. "Uh, what the hell am I then?" Angel said.
"Well, you're an important part of our family here Angel, but you uhm, uh…" Charlie said as she tried to find the words.
Vaggie rolled her eye "Constantly make us look bad, sexually harass the staff, and have literally never once tried to improve?"
Charlie sadly smiled "What she means is, it's just nice to have someone interested for once."
As Charlie walks back to Madame Pentious, Angel Dust looks downtrodden, likely feeling sad about Vaggie's comments and Charlie's unintentional dismissal of him.
Lobo saw this and walked up to Angel and patted him on the shoulder "Look Angel don't take it the wrong way. But sometimes your actions will come back and bite you. Just think before you speak ok pal." Lobo said as he walked away to catch up with the girls.
Niffty is seen playing with Keekee with a string when Charlie and Madame Pentious approach. Keekee hisses at the sight of Madame Pentious and scatters away while Niffty turns to meet her.
"Over here we have our maid Niffty." Charlie said as Niffty looked unamused. "Oh great, another woman." She said.
Niffty gets up and she sees a cockroach as she pulls out a needle "Heh heh. Stab. Stab." She said as she chased the cockroach.
"We're about 80% sure she's harmless, and over here we have-" nearly bumps into Alazia "Oh! Uh, Alazia! Our gracious facility manager! You've met our newest guest Madame Pentious…hehe.."
"Ah yes! You're the one who ruined my coat!" Alazia said as Madame Pentious can feel Alazia's anger on her. Alazia's eyes glow red in the dark with a violent temptation to rip her apart. "I definitely remember you now."
Madame Pentious gulps nervously.
"Well, I guess this is a great time for your first lesson!" Clears throat "How to apologize! The first step to becoming a better person is to admit when you are wrong, why don't you give it a try?"
Madame Pentious swallows her spit "Yes..uhm.. Ms uhm.. Radio Demon Mam, please forgive me for attacking you and ruining your very lovely coat.. uhm.. here." As a token of apology, Madame Pentious hands back the small fabric she tore from Alazia's coat. Alazia takes it and inspects the damage.
"Ah-Ho! Not many people have been able to take even this much off me, it must have meant quite a lot to you." Despite being generous, Alazia spontaneously combusts the fabric tear into green flames, leaving Madame Pentious and Charlie stunned.
"Hah that two people who got the drop on you huh Alazia." Lobo said, smirking. Alazia turns to Lobo "Haha. Fuck you." She said before Charlie and Vaggie got in between them so they didn't start a fight.
The scene cuts to a group gathering introducing Madame Pentious to the hotel.
"Now, with a new resident, I think it's important we all get to know each other! So we are going to play a little game. Everyone, follow me. My name is Charlie *claps twice* I like to sing! *claps twice* and when we get to know each other it's the greatest thing! *claps twice*"
"My name's Madame Pentious *claps twice* I like to build *claps twice* and despite my stupid Egg Bois, I think I'm very skilled! *claps twice*
When it was Angel's turn, he looked disinterested, looking up from his phone. "This is stupid."
"This- is not- stupid! *claps twice* It's just a game! *claps twice* Madame Pentious did it well so now please try to do the same! *claps twice*" Charlie said.
"I am too sober for this." Angel said.
"Well, get used to it and learn how to play, this is gonna be your whole day! *claps twice*" Vaggie said.
The next scene cuts to an act with Angel Dust wearing a trench coat and a hat as he reads a script. Madame Pentious is also acting as an innocent child wearing a sailor suit, licking a comically large lollipop.
Angel Dust looks at the script "Oh, I'm a bad man on the streets who never got enough hugs, now, where's an innocent kid I can sell crack to?" Then he looks at Charlie and Lobo "Wow, who wrote this?"
"It's great right? Keep going!" Charlie said
Angel Dust shakes his head and goes back acting "Hey you." He said as Madame Pentious points at herself "Who, me?"
"Yeah, you look like a kid who could use some… devil's dandruff??" Oh, for fuck's sake.
"Not me! I have to go home and study!" Madame Pentious said.
"Come on kid, it'll make you cool like me …the crackhead." He winced internally at the jab.
"The only cool thing here is to say no to drugs! Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before marriage!" Madame Pentious said.
Charlie stands up and claps* Yes! Oh bravo! Bravo!" She chuckles "Wow, Pentious! At this rate, you'll be redeemed in no time."
Angel Dust looked hurt at this and turned away "I... I'm going to bed." As Angel heads back up to his room, he overhears Charlie congratulating Madame Pentious. Looking back at them, he looks sad.
"I am so proud of you Madame Pentious! That was amazing!" Charlie said.
"Thank you! Thank you! You like me! You really like me!" Madame Pentious said as this is the first time someone actually encouraged her.
In Angel's room, Fat Nuggets is asleep on his bed until Angel accidentally throws his coat on top of him. Fat Nuggets grunts and crawls out of the coat, as he watches Angel lie down on his bed.
Angel glumly looks at his phone and sees all his voice mails from Valentino. Angel sighs and begins to play them. Valentino's voice mails switch back and forth between a friendly, apologetic tone and a barrage of screams threatening violence.
Valentino (voice message):
"Angel baby, come home! It's not the same without you here, I miss you! Come back-"
"ANGEL, YOU BITCH! IF YOU DON'T COME HOME, YOU'LL BE FUCKING GREASY TRUCKERS FOR THE NEXT YEAR-"
"Hey, amorcito, I didn't mean to yell, but you know how crazy you make me-"
"YOU FUCKING SLUT!"
"Hey, Angie! About earlier-"
"-KILL YOUR WHOLE FUCKIN' FAMILY!"
"Work's really stressful!"
"-LITTLE COCKSUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!"
"You actually think you can change?"
Red smoke appears from seemingly nowhere, and circles around Angel until Val stops talking, ending with the smoke clinging around his neck and chin like hands before fading away.
"Addict trash like you doesn't change. I'll see you soon, baby."
Angel sighs as Fat Nuggets gets on the bed next to him.
Angel Dust looked at Fat Nugget "...Sorry, not now, Fat Nuggets."
Angel gets up and leaves his room with Fat Nuggets looking worried. Angel goes to Husk's bar, picks up a whole bottle, and starts drinking alcohol. Out of the corner of his eye, he notices something slithering away.
He follows, finding Charlie's office door opened, and takes a peek inside. There, he discovers that Madame Pentious is setting up a small camera in one of the bookshelves, a camera that belongs to Vox. Angel realizes what she's been doing and slams the door open.
"You slippery little shit!" Angel said as he pointed his finger at her.
Madame Pentious yelps
"You're working for the Vees? I fucking knew there was something shitty about you." Angel said
Madame Pentious averted her eyes "I don't know what you're talking about!…whore bug!"
Angel, sufficiently angered, tackles Madame Pentious on the ground. He punches her in the face before wrestling with her.
"Get your aggressively average body…OFF OF ME!" Madame Pentious's uses her eyes' spiral hypnotic powers on him. Angel becomes momentarily hypnotized.
Angel Dust shook his head "Fuck!" Angel backs away. He then quickly snaps out of it. He now has Madame Pentious cornered. Right then, Lobo Charlie and Vaggie woke up after hearing the scuffle.
Charlie yawns "What's going on?" She said as she saw Madame Pentious' face bruised.
Angel points his finger at Madame Pentious "This little bitch is a traitor! She working with the Vees" Angel said
"Preposterous! I would never betray you. You... are my best friends!" Madame Pentious said as she hugged both girls and Lobo.
"Uh huh, then explain this!" Angel lifts off one of the books to reveal a camera, much to Charlie's shock. Madame Pentious realizes that her cover is blown and scurries away. She brings out her wrist watch to make contact with Vox.
"Ah! Ah! Abort! Abort! S.O.S! Agent Pentious in need of immediate evacuation!" Madame Pentious said to Vox.
Vox immediately picks up "Pentious? Wait… you were caught?!? It hasn't even been a day!" Vox laughs.
"Please! You've got to get me out of here!" Madame Pentious pleaded.
"I can't believe we thought you could handle even something this simple! Do us a favour, if they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself! You MISERABLE FAILURE!" Vox said before disconnected.
Madame Pentious started crying "I... I… just make it quick I guess…not that I deserve it."
Madame Pentious lies on the ground, with Vaggie holding a spear ready to pierce the skull.
"Gladly." Vaggie said right before she could put her out of misery, Lobo stopped her by grabbing her spear and shook his head.
"Wait! ...Pentious?" Charlie extends her hand towards Pentious
"It starts with sorry, that's your foot in the door. One simple sorry, spoken straight from your core. The path to forgiveness, is a twisting trail of hearts! But sorry is where it starts!"
Madame Pentious- "Who could forgive a dirtbag like me? I don't deserve your amnesty."
Angel walks into frame with dual Tommy submachine guns in both hands with Vaggie trailing behind, holding her spear.
Angel Dust and Vaggie- "Can't we just kill him? "Shoot him and spill his blood?"
Lobo- "That's an option you could choose."
Angel Dust and Vaggie- "Works for us."
Charlie and Lobo- "But who hasn't been in her shoes? It starts with sorry.
Madame Pentious- "Sorry."
Charlie- "Dig down deeper and say one sincere sorry!"
Madame Pentious- "I'm so sorry!"
Charlie:- "And your journey's underway!"
Charlie and Madame Pentious- It'll take time to cover your/my vast multitude of sins. But sorry is where it begins. It starts with sorry.
As the song ends, Niffty is seen standing in the hallway in her bedwear. "I hated that song! Why are you so lame?!" Niffty kicks her on one of her tail 'eyes' and walks away.
Charlie happily sighs "Good first day! Let's get some rest!" As Charlie and the others leave with a wrist watch communicator still left in the office, Alazia appears from the shadow of the dark hallway with a malevolent smile. She comes and picks up the watch before contacting Vox on the watch.
"WHAT?!?" Vox pauses when he realizes that Alazia is the one calling him, showing fear in his screen face as Alazia laughs.
"You'll have to try harder than that next time, ol' pal!" Alazia crushes the watch with her bare hand as Vox incoherently rages at her as the watch becomes incapable of creating audio, before Alazia retreats back into the darkness, chuckling.