The Misadventures of Kazuma and Aqua
Episode 2
War of the Idiots
Kazuma and Aqua stood before each other at an open field, with a bright red sunset in the distance, glaring at each other with a look of determination in their eyes.
"It's been years, and you STILL think you're better than me Kazuma-san?" Aqua asked.
"This final challenge will put an end to all of this, and I will win!" Kazuma said with confidence.
"Bring it on, Shut-in-NEET-Fuck!" Aqua said.
As the two continued to glare at each other, sparks flew in rivalry. As for the challenge, it was…
"Find the picture that makes this sound…"Meow!""
Kazuma and Aqua were screaming frantically and making other kinds of retarded noises as they were freaking out over a simple educational game on the PC.
"You picked the duck! "Qwack, qwack!""
"WROOOOOOONG!"
"SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!" Aqua screamed.
"HA! Suck it Aqua! I'm Number One! And you're Number ZERO!" Kazuma bragged with pride while rubbing Aqua's face.
"FUCK YOU, SHUT-IN NEET!" Aqua screamed as she jumped on Kazuma, tackling him to the ground.
The two started beating each other senseless in a fight cloud, screaming, swearing and calling each other rude names on top of that.
"HEY! You two better not be fighting against each other!" Rimuru Tempest (from the hit anime "Reincarnated as a Slime") showed up and scolded them both.
Next thing you know, Kazuma and Aqua are now hugging, holding hands and laughing together while showering each other with compliments, like Kazuma calling Aqua cute and beautiful and Aqua calling Kazuma strong and handsome.
Rimuru looks at the screen with a smile, "See? Ever since I started threatening them, they finally started getting along as friends!"
Kazuma and Aqua continued being friends, until YunYun showed up carrying a bag of trash, "Excuse me, but I need someone to take out the garbage." She spoke.
Kazuma and Aqua paused for a moment and looked at YunYun.
Kazuma and Aqua's fantasy
"I need either a cute and beautiful Goddess or a strong handsome man to take out the garbage." YunYun said in a cutesy, pleading manner, "Oh, who could they be?"
Back to reality
Kazuma and Aqua both made a dash towards YunYun, and both grabbed the garbage bag from her, and they both started fighting over it, much to YunYun's confusion.
"Wait, hold up! There is only one man who can decide who is best suited for this task!" Aqua said.
Both Aqua and Kazuma looked at Rimuru, who sighed in exasperation.
"Fine…I guess it's time for another edition of the "War of the Idiots"." Rimuru said with a shrug.
"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Aqua and Kazuma shouted in excitement.
WAR OF THE IDIOTS! – START!
Round 1: Who can survive the longest after stealing Milim's honey?
"Yay! Honey!" Milim happily prepared a big picnic packed with lots of tasty snacks and of course lots of…
"Huh?!" Milim immediately noticed that all the honey she packed was suddenly gone, "My…HOOOOOOOOOONEEEEEEEEEEEY!" she screamed like a banshee as she snapped in rage, her eyes glowing a demonic red.
Meanwhile, Kazuma and Aqua were running down the hedge maze while both carrying Milim's honey jars.
Suddenly Milim, who just transformed into her True Form, landed right in front of them, "You kiddies gonna die tonight!" she threatened.
"Aw hell naw!" Aqua ran to the left.
"Nope nope NOPE!" Kazuma ran to the right.
"Cowards!" Milim said she flew after them.
With Aqua…
"Gotta hide, gotta hide, gotta hide!" Aqua said to herself, until she found a pile of garbage. She had an idea.
"IMA BANANA!" Aqua "disguised" herself as a banana peel sitting next to the garbage pile, as Milim flew past her while making Nightmare Fuel sounds.
With Kazuma…
"RUN BITCH! RUUUUUUUN!" Kazuma screamed as he ran down the road, then climbed up to the top of the house.
At the top, Kazuma looked around for an escape route. He spotted a warp gate nearby.
"Yes! Home free!" Kazuma shouted triumphantly as he ran towards the edge of the rooftop and took one big leap towards the warp gate.
"I believe I can Fly" plays while Kazuma is leaping toward the warp gate in slow motion
Suddenly Milim appeared and pulled the warp gate out of the way, revealing a rock right behind it. As a result, Kazuma missed the warp gate and landed groin first on the rock.
"AAAAAAAAAH! MY "EXCALIBUR'S" STUCK IN THE STONE!" Kazuma screamed with a high-pitched voice, while in excruciating pain.
While he was stunned in pain, and with a "Hmph", Milim took this opportunity to snatch the honey back from him, "Now where's the other one?" she wondered.
Back with Aqua…
After losing Milim, Aqua got out of her "disguise" and started running down the maze while carrying the stolen honey. She noticed the exit sign in front of her.
"Yay! Home free!" Aqua squealed with joy as she headed for the exit.
Her joy turned to horror when she looked to the side and noticed Milim, who was preparing to unleash her dark magic on her.
"Oh…shit!" Aqua cursed in fear.
"DRAGON NOVA!" Milim shouted in a demonic tone.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!
The entire area was blown to smithereens, leaving nothing but a smoking crater where Aqua once stood. Milim stood there in silence for about a minute until a soot-covered Aqua landed headfirst in front of her, getting her entire top half stuck on the ground, leaving only her bottom half as she kept shaking her legs and her skirt lifted, exposing her "invisible panties".
Milim remained stoic as she stretched out her arm and caught the honey jars that Aqua had stolen.
"Yay! Honey!" Milim mood turned happy and cute again as she got her precious honey back, reverting to her Concealed form.
Meanwhile, Rimuru saw the whole thing and looked at the screen with a deadpan expression, "I call this round a tie."
Round 2: Who can spend an entire day without drinking alcohol
"AW HELL NAW!" Aqua screamed in rage, "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"
Aqua screamed as she grabbed her bottles of alcoholic drinks and jumped out the window.
Kazuma smirks smugly at the screen, "Told ya she wouldn't last a second."
Round 3: Who would win in a staring contest? Wiz and Kazuma or Spontaneous Bootay and Aqua?
Now it was a staring contest, with Kazuma versus Spontaneous Bootay and Aqua versus YunYun.
Aqua vs. Wiz
At first it seemed like Aqua was casually winning against Wiz, but its revealed that she had fallen asleep as she laid on the ground wearing wide-open eyes gag glasses over her sleepy eyes.
"Zzzzz…ah, sweet scotch…zzzzzz…ah, spicy cachaça…zzzzzzzz…" Aqua murmured in her sleep, as she dreamed about booze.
"I win!" Wiz said happily.
Kazuma vs. Spontaneous Bootay
"Hey honey, you look like you could be a one fine hunk of a man if you a few years older." Bootay said seductively to Kazuma.
"…" Kazuma was sweating bullets as he struggles to keep his eyes open while staring at Bootay's eyes and not focus on anything else.
"You know? It's a real shame you already have a cute girl, but honey let me tell you…your girl needs to drink more milk, cuz…she's lacking."
"…" Kazuma tries to ignore her words as he keeps his eyes on Bootay.
"Silence huh? Oh my, I guess you do have a thing for the petite underdeveloped ones. If I didn't know any better, I'd peg you for a creepy pedo."
"…" Kazuma was in tears as he struggled to keep his eyes open, as Bootay showed off her "assets while also keeping her eyes on his eyes.
"Sorry, that came off as rude an insensitive, but you really should tell your girl to…"
"EXPLOSION!"
Bootay screamed in horror as she was sent flying by a magical explosion, courtesy of Megumin.
"Nobody…messes…with my…man…" Megumin said as she collapsed in exhaustion.
"…" Kazuma collapsed as well as he still had his eyes open, except they were all red and teary.
"Well, didn't see that coming…" Rimuru said, "And since Bootay was taken out by an outsider, Team Wiz and Kazuma are disqualified."
Round 4: Who can endure ten servings of "Mystery Food X" and give Yukiko and Chie a GOOD review?
Kazuma and Aqua were both frowning in fear as they looked down at the dishes of "Mystery Food X" in curry form. A purple miasma emanated from the "curry", a sure sign that this stuff wasn't edible.
They look up and see Yukiko Amagi and Chie Satonaka (both from Persona 4) waiting for them to try out their "meals" made of "love".
Aqua secretly tried to sneak some red wine into the concussion disguised as curry, but Chie caught her in the act and snatched the bottle from her hand.
"Oh no you don't!" Chie said.
"Noooo…" Aqua cried.
Kazuma frowned hard in disgust as he reluctantly forced himself into taking a bite out of the curry. Unfortunately, as soon as he put that disgusting slop in his mouth, he started vomiting rainbows.
Meanwhile, Aqua pretty much suffered the same fate as she puked her guts out from forcing herself from eating that pile of toxic waste that those two psychos called "food".
Next up, Yukiko and Chie brought out their "special dishes": a "Mystery Food X" sandwich for Aqua and a "Mystery Food X" taco for Kazuma.
"O Heavens, PLEASE…end my suffering!" Aqua cried in despair as she forced herself to eat the sandwich.
"Why am I still here and still kicking? I wanna die!" Kazuma cried as he forced himself to eat the taco.
"Alright! Review time!" Chie said.
"So, how was the food?" Yukiko asked them.
"This sandwich…tastes like shit!" Aqua roared in anger, "And the worst part? There's no turkey in it! Stupid bitches!"
She throws the sandwich at Yukiko's face. The heir to the Amagi Inn didn't take that well however and…
"KONOHANA SAKUYA!"
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Aqua screamed like a banshee while running around with her butt on fire from Yukiko's Persona casting Agidyne on her, "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I DON'T GET MY TURKEY SANDWICH!"
"Kazuma-san?" Yukiko and Chie looked at Kazuma.
"The mashed potatoes are TOO SWEET, it tastes like a horse's ASS, THERE'S A PUBE IN THE MIX AND MY NIPPLES ARE HARD!" Kazuma gave a colorful critique about the taco.
Yukiko and Chie stared at him in awkward silence.
"Ten out of ten!" Kazuma sobbed as he reluctantly gave them a good review.
Meanwhile Aqua sighed in relief as she sat down in the water-filled kitchen sink to put of the fire in the background.
Round 5: Who can help an old lady cross the street the fastest?
Kazuma and Aqua stood before a crossing path across the street with two old ladies. Rimuru held up the flag.
"Ready…set…GO!" Rimuru waved the flag, starting the race.
Kazuma and Aqua kept cheering for their respective grannies as they slowly crossed the street.
"MOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!" Aqua shouted as she tried pushing the old lady she was cheering for.
"COME ON! DO IT! JUST DO IT! MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE!" Kazuma cheered for the old lady he was cheering for.
"LET'S GO!" Aqua rolled the old granny like a snowball.
Suddenly a taxi showed up driving down at top speed towards them.
"OH NO!" Aqua cried as she threw the old lady she was helping up, getting her out of harm's way as the Goddess of Water gets hit by the taxi. The old lady landed back on her feet and resumed crossing the street.
"HAHA! I'm gonna win!" Kazuma said as he strapped some rockets onto the old lady he was helping.
Kazuma's old lady was sent flying across the street thanks to the rockets, but ended up crashing into Aqua's old lady, sending her flying across and crashing against the building on the other end of the street, basically reaching the other side before Kazuma's.
"I did it! I WIN!" Aqua, who was covered in bruises from getting hit by the taxi, cheered and started doing her victory dance.
"Meh, you got lucky…" Kazuma pouted, while the old lady he was help screamed in horror while flying around with the rockets strapped to her in the background.
Round 6: Who has the longest "Excalibur"?
"Hey, wait just a minute!" Aqua complained, realizing what this meant.
"HA! You're a GIRL and I'm a GUY! I win by default!" Kazuma said with pride he opens his zipper revealing and showing off his "Excalibur" (Don't worry, its censored), rubbing his "victory" on Aqua's face.
Aqua glared at him in anger, "That's it! I'm getting the scissors!" she roared as she left to find the scissors.
Round 7: Who can make the best impression of Darkness?
Kazuma and Aqua both cosplay as Darkness and start imitating her.
"Hi, I'm Darkness, a crusader and also a perverted masochist!" Aqua said imitating Darkness' voice.
"Oh no! My accuracy is so horrid! Oh no! I'm getting mugged! But ooooh, it feeeels sooooo goooooood!" Kazuma said imitating Darkness as well.
"Oh my God! I'm getting devoured by a big monstrous toad! Oh, how wonderful!" Aqua said while poking her head out of a Big Toad's mouth.
"Oh please, swing those blades all over me and tear my clothes off so everyone can see my birthday suit! Oh, how lovely!" Kazuma said.
"Ooooh, pain makes me feel so horny!" Aqua said.
"Ooooh please, give me the best time of my life with both whips and candles!" Kazuma said.
Meanwhile, Darkness watched Kazuma and Aqua making their impressions of her and, looked visibly disturbed.
"Do I really sound like that?" Darkness asked Rimuru, Megumin and the others.
"Uuuuuuuuuh…" None had the courage to respond.
"Yes." Except for Megumin of course.
"Anyway, I call this a tie. Moving on." Rimuru said.
Round 8: Who can catch the legendary Golden Imp first?
The Golden Imp was a legendary creature said to grant eternal riches for anyone who captured it, so naturally Kazuma and Aqua were more than determined to capture this creature and put an end to their debt problem.
Unfortunately, capturing it wasn't going to be easy, as the Golden Imp is known for its high agility and evasion stats as well as its cunning nature, giving him a high intelligence stat as well.
Despite this, they will try.
The Golden Imp was just minding its own business as it walked down the street of a small village, when Aqua popped up from a rooftop.
"Get the Motherfucker!" Aqua shouted.
Kazuma let out a battle cry as he jumped out of nowhere with a giant net, but the Golden Imp reacted quick and dodged.
Golden Imp ran inside a tavern, thinking he was safe, only for Aqua to pop out from a vase, both dirt and plant on top of her head.
"The fuck!?" Golden Imp screamed in shock.
"Get in the net you filthy animal!" Aqua shouted as she jumped at him with her net, but Golden Imp dodged.
Aqua chased after the Golden Imp, causing chaos and destruction in the tavern as the people ran out in panic.
"Hey, what's going on…!?" The tavern's owner suddenly got caught in Aqua's net, as she missed the Golden Imp again.
The Golden Imp ran out of the tavern and ran down the railway, with Aqua and Kazuma in hot pursuit. The Golden Imp ran inside the tunnel and just when Kazuma and Aqua were about to go in, they stopped at the sound of a train whistle.
"Uh oh." Kazuma and Aqua said.
Sweatdrops rolled down the side of their heads, one on each
"PINGAS! PINGAS, PINGAS! PINGAS!" An irritating voice spoke from the tunnel, followed by train sounds.
"RUN BITCH! RUUUUUUUN!" Kazuma yelled as he and Aqua turned around and ran away from the infamous, dreaded PINGAS Train! The Golden Imp was riding on top of it.
"Having fun yet, bitches!?" The Golden Imp taunted, while giving them the troll face and "flipping the bird" at them.
Round 9: Who can outrun the PINGAS Train?
Kazuma and Aqua screamed at the top of their lungs as they ran as fast as they could, but it was no use…the PINGAS Train was simply too fast and…
Next thing you know, Kazuma and Aqua were both sent to the hospital after that unfortunate incident.
Round 10: Cosplay contest! ^_^
Kazuma and Aqua stood on stage as they stared at each other like they are about to have a duel. Rimuru, joined by Subaru (from the hit anime, Re-Zero) watched as they took on the role of judges.
Aqua started by dressing up as Sailor Moon, "I am Sailor Moon and in the name of the Moon, I will punish you!"
Kazuma followed-up by dressing up as Vegeta, "I am the Prince of all Saiyans! I am Vegeta!"
Next, Aqua dressed up as Saint Tail, "It's…SHOWTIME!"
Then Kazuma dressed up as Tanjiro Kamado (from Demon Slayer), then Aqua dressed up as Momoko (from Momo Kyun Sword), the Kazuma dressed up as Yuji Itadori (from Jujutsu Kaisen), then Aqua dressed up as Sakura Hagiwara (from Wanna be the Strongest in the World), then Kazuma dressed up as Natsu (from Fairy Tail), then Aqua dressed up as Sakura Haruno (from Naruto), then Kazuma dressed up as Katsuki Bakugo (from My Hero Academia), and then…
"Stop! STOP!" Rimuru and Subaru both shouted.
"Huh?" Kazuma and Aqua stopped in confusion, while dressed up as Byakuya Togami (from Danganronpa) and Vanilla (from World's End Club), respectively.
"Both of you are lame!" Rimuru told them.
"Come on Rimuru, let's show these losers how its REALLY done!" Subaru said.
Rimuru dresses up as Goku (from Dragon Ball) and Subaru as Luffy (from One Piece) and charge up their respective signature moves.
"GOMU GOMU NO PISTOL!" Subaru shouted.
"KA-ME-HA-ME-HAAAAAAAA!" Rimuru shouted.
Kazuma and Aqua screamed the "MLG Scream" as they got reduced to a skeleton and a puddle of water respectively by the sheer awesomeness of Rimuru and Subaru's cosplay.
Round 11: Who is the best wallet inspector?
Kazuma disguised himself as a "wallet inspector", which included a top hat, monocle and a false mustache and started going around annoying and scaring the hell out of everyone, claiming to be a wallet inspector.
Rimuru noticed Aqua doing nothing, "Why aren't you doing anything?"
"Wallet inspection is stupid!" Aqua said, "I want to inspect something way more fun!"
"And what would that be?" Rimuru asked.
"Distillery Inspector!" Aqua said excitedly.
"Oh…" Rimuru said with a bored tone.
A sweat drop rolled down the side of his head
While Kazuma was busy inspecting wallets, Aqua was going around inspecting distilleries and getting drunk while she was at it. It was like heaven to her.
TRIPLE ROUND!
Round 12: Who can survive a tea party with Webby (from Ducktales (1987))?
Round 13: Who can survive listening to Sephiroth talking about Rebecca Black?
Round 14: Who can survive staring at Shrek (from "Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life")?
Kazuma and Aqua found themselves having a tea party with Webby, Sephiroth and Shrek. While Webby was keeping up the cutesy tea party role play, Sephiroth would stop gushing or simping about Rebecca Black and Shrek was just chanting "Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life" over and over, like he's doing an occult brainwashing chant. Kazuma and Aqua looked at each other and both agreed…this was a mistake.
Round 15: 10-person tag team wrestling match! Aqua teams up with Darkness, Mitsuri (from Demon Slayer), Kokoa Shuzen (from Rosario + Vampire) and Webby (from Ducktales (1987), while Kazuma teams up with Megumin, Subaru (from Re:Zero), Donkey (from Shrek) and Happy (from Fairy Tail).
On the wrestling ring, in the red corner, there's Team Aqua, with Darkness, Mitsuri, Kokoa and Webby standing by Aqua's side, while in the blue corner there's Team Kazuma, with Megumin, Subaru, Donkey and Happy standing by Kazuma's side.
Rimuru stood in the center as he spoke into the microphone: "Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it's time for the main event! Are both sides ready for this?"
"Yeah!" Aqua shouted.
"Bring it on!" Kazuma shouted.
"Then…LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET'S GET READY TO RUMBLEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Rimuru announced as the bell rang, starting the match.
"Let's get ready to Rumble!" plays
Both teams let out a battle cry as they charged at each other, throwing everything they got, from Piledrivers, to Boston Crabs, to steel chair slamming, German Suplexes, the whole deal. It was absolute chaos as both teams decimated each other.
Mitsuri gave Happy the German Suplex!
Donkey gave Kokoa the Headbutt!
Megumin Piledrove Webby to the ground!
Subaru gave Darkness the Boston Crab!
Kazuma slammed Aqua across the ring with the steel chair, but then Aqua bounced off the ropes, turned around and landed a Hip Attack right Kazuma's face, sending him flying across the ring!
Aqua then slammed down on Kazuma, pinning him to the ground. Rimuru started counting down, but before he reached "three", Kazuma managed to push Aqua off him as they resumed the match!
"EXCUSE ME!"
The song stops
The wrestling match was interrupted by the sound of an inpatient YunYun carrying a bag of garbage, as she glared at Kazuma and Aqua.
"If you two are done with your little "lovers' quarrel", could ONE OF YOU, PLEASE, TAKE THE GOSHDARN GARBAGE OUT!?"
"Wow, what an asshole…" Kazuma said.
"But she's right, this war of ours has gone on long enough." Aqua said, "It's time to settle this, the definitive way! You know what that means, right?"
"Oooooooh yeaaaaaaah!" Kazuma smirked.
Final Round: RAP BATTLE OF THE IDIOTS!
Kazuma and Aqua stood before each other, this time both wearing shades, caps and golden chain necklaces and rings on their hands, and both holding a microphone, both ready to face each other in a Rap Battle!
The Boombox started playing as Aqua went first!
"Time to do this, bitches! Aqua's in the house and she's back to slay! You think you can beat me? I can rap all day! Time to time, you try to beat my rhymes, but you're so bad! It should be a crime! You think you're hot shit Kazuma Satou-san? But if you ask me, you're more of a Kazuma Snore-san! Stick with me and I might help you get out of your pathetic Shut-In NEET shell! But like you mortals say: You can't polish a turd!"
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHH!" The audience went wild at Aqua's sick mic drop.
Kazuma took a deep breath as he took his turn now!
"Oh boy, it's that time again! Time to wreck a Useless Goddess! Maybe after this, I'll give myself a big medallion! It can be a pendant of the bitch that I really hate! Lazy, annoying and alcoholic! You try to act big while I'm already famous, but when you're alone, you shove a bottle of booze up your anus! Now sit back, relax and enjoy the show! And let me show you, how a proper rap goes!"
Suddenly a third player enters the mix! Kazuma and Aqua looked to the side and saw the silhouette of the new challenger.
Here comes a new challenger!
"You guys are so lame! Let me show you how it's REALLY done!" The third player said as he walked out of the shadows, revealing themselves to be none other than Sephiroph (from Final Fantasy VII).
Sephiroph joins the Rap Battle!
"Greetings bitches! It's me! The One-Winged Angel! The epitome of swagger! Here to wreck the nagging of you two braggers! Now watch me blow you away in a flash! As I show off my absolute power and fat stacks of riches! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Aqua was having none of it as she started rapping again!
"Looks like the One-Winged Angel decided to come out of the shadows! But meh! Whatever! I'm gonna send him to hell! With my rhythms so hot, they'll melt your face off! Then maybe I'll grab a bottle of Martini as I laugh at your rotting corpse! Sephiroph, you're a joke! Have you seen the way you look? You look like something some edgy 13-year-old drew in a coloring book! You think blowing up the planet is the way to please yo mamma? Maybe you should shower, then maybe she'll keep you around for an extra hour!"
Sephiroph glared at Aqua as he started rapping again!
"Oh look, it's Aqua! The Useless Goddess of Water! You get humiliated, ridiculed, and treated as the butt of the joke by everyone around you! Yet you're as happy-go-lucky as ever, as if none of it ever happened! Seriously, just where does your confidence stem from? And now you tryin' to act cool in front of ME? Now that's a new low! Move aside you loathsome brat! Cuz Sephiroph's here! I'm tall, handsome, strong…!"
"Don't forget, he's a Momma's Boy!" Aqua intercepted with a smug grin.
"Shut the hell up, you booze-loving freak!" Sephiroph continued, "All you ever do all day, is freaking streak! Your so-called friends and worshippers don't love you! Your relationship with them is filled with lies! But when they see me, they send their panties flying! Come on, just try and hit me with your "Goddess Punch" and watch as you fail to even bruise me! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Kazuma stepped in.
"Oh geez, it's Sephiroph! I think I need my glasses, because now this room has TWO giant asses! What are you even doing here? You're giving me a fever! Go back home and hump some Rebecca Black! You act like you're slick! You act like you're swanky! But the closest you'll ever get is the coolness of Webby! Why do you even act like a villain, when all your momma needs are Netflix and chillin'? Now hands in the air if you think Sephiroph is whack!"
Kazuma and Aqua raise their hands, followed by Megumin, Darkness, Wiz, Rimuru and everyone involved.
"There you go Sephy, there's your feedback!"
Sephiroph scoffs as he continues rapping.
"Oh boy! Kazuma Satou! The Hero! The Legend! The Star! The Man of the Hour! It's a shame when you fight, all you do is sit there and cower as you watch your harem get wrecked! Even YunYun is cooler than you! If I were you, I'd be pissing my pants in fear! Stay away from me even if you were prepared! I'm the One-Winged Angel, everyone's worst nightmare! Are you visually impaired? Don't worry, no one really cares! You think you're cool? Well, let me give you a pitch! You're worthless, pathetic and a downright bitch! All your fans think you're weird and you bring shame to the word ISEKAI!"
Kazuma and Aqua snapped as Sephiroph just crossed the line right there and then. They look at each other, a nod, agreeing to put their differences aside and team-up against this jerky edgelord.
"Shut up Sephiroph! No one really likes you! You're a real mess!" Aqua rapped.
"How can Jenova like you when you don't even know how to dress?" Kazuma followed up.
"You may look like an angel, but you're more like a feral pigeon!" Aqua taunted.
"The person who made must have been a real emo!" Kazuma gave him the troll face.
"You're annoying, shameless! The bane of us all!" Aqua taunted some more.
"Why don't you go home and swing on your Sephy Ball?" Kazuma smirked as he flipped the bird at Sephiroph.
K.O.!
Sephiroph screamed in horror as Aqua and Kazuma's double team rap knocking him off the edge of the arena, sending him falling to his doom, "I CAN'T BELIEVE I SHAVED MY LEGS FOR THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS!"
Kazuma and Aqua proudly smirked in triumph as they just put that One-Winged Edgelord Jerk in his place. They gave each other a high-five.
"So, who won the war?" Megumin asked Rimuru.
"Honestly, I have no idea. I'll let the readers decide." Rimuru shrugged.
"Fair enough." Megumin said.
Everyone left as they carried on with their lives.
THE END…FOR NOW
YunYun stood there holding the bag of garbage, realizing that everyone forgot about her and the garbage yet again. She sighed in defeat, "Fine, I'll do it myself…" she reluctantly decided to take the garbage out herself.
A/N: And there you have it folks. A parody of SMG4's "War of the Fat Italians – 2016 edition". Hope you enjoyed it! R&R please! Also, next time: "Kazuma gets his "Excalibur" stuck on the door!"