Chapter X

Grueling

That had been the most apropos term to use for the feeling he had felt long since IA had shown their hand.

At first, all seemed well with the introduction to Lieutenant Gates, but things had gone downhill quickly from there. They had been loaded up into the NYPD van they had all been standing next to, and before they knew it, they all found themselves back at the Twelfth Precinct.

And since he wasn't NYPD per se, he was separated from his team, directed to sit still in one of the interrogation rooms while the others got into who knows what.

Once he had sat down, he was quickly assaulted with the last time he had been on this side of the table, how it had been all summer before he and Beckett had seen each other. Naturally, Kate had been quite upset with him over not calling, but in his defense, he thought she was still with Demming, so what was the point in him calling? He knew that was a weak argument, but still, it killed him to see the two of them acting all lovey-dovey in the precinct and he didn't get to bring her coffee anymore.

He wouldn't allow his heart to get easily broken, so he ran when she turned down at least a chance for some normalcy to return to them, and maybe more, after his invitation to the Hamptons. As far as he was concerned, the two of them had moved on, even though his heart had sung a vastly different tune.

But when he came back, he found out they had split, and he had to find a way to get back in, and start chipping away at the wall he helped erect over the course of those long three months. Things got better, he ended things with Gina, and then in walked Josh.

Bleugh.

That name still left a sour taste in his mouth regardless of the fact that he was way out of the picture, and that kiss… well, any of those kisses that they shared since he came walking back through Montgomery's front door after that tumble out the window.

But back then,

Woah, back then? Back then felt like it was months ago.

But it was back to the timeless banter and innuendo, all the while he was thinking that maybe he was getting through to her, showing her he could be more than just a class clown… be somebody serious, somebody real.

The real him.

But then they caught a dead taxi driver, a dirty bomb, and a freezer that nearly took the both of them out.

That last one, he was sure she'd almost confessed her true feelings before the cold took her.

Then his lights went out and he was brought back to the sight of Josh. Josh, who wasn't supposed to be here, at all. And since he was there, Kate was hopeful about him staying, and not flying off with Doctors Without Borders, that she and the doctor had a chance.

And that was the only time he'd ever swear hearing words like that would shatter his heart right where he stood. And with that revelation ripe in his hand, he realized that she was happy, he didn't fit in anymore, at least, not in the way he wanted to, so he was going to leave, once and for all.

But then the next four days happened, and everything got turned on its head.

If he had known all it would've taken her to realize how much he meant to her to have his blood at a crime scene and disappear for a day, he would've done it sooner. But then again, they might not have been there earlier, the right feelings may not have been there before that bombing case.

Who knows for sure?

All that mattered was that their minds were both spoken, with no hesitation from either of them, and now with the knowledge of how she truly fit at his side, he was missing her something fierce as he sat on the chilled steel chair in Interrogation 1.

He was grateful that he had already gone through the first round of questioning because they were relentless.

More like, she was relentless.

Victoria Gates was no officer to trifle with, that much he had learned from the strenuous questionings she had for him. But, with him being a writer, it was easy for him to craft a story that provided a reason for him being at Montgomery's house so late at night, just two friends catching up after such a debilitating case, talking about their next golf excursion with the mayor and possibly Judge Markway.

It was easy for him to evade the other questions, he was just a measly writer after all, not someone who could pose a threat to anyone, much less take out an entire strike team composed of ex-Navy Seals and other various military backgrounds, so the good Lieutenant left him be in the box, with a whisper of being back soon to question him more after checking his story with the others.

And so that's where he had been waiting, mindlessly typing on the metal table as he was already thinking of a scene to draw inspiration from the events of six hours ago.

Six hours?

Oh brother, is that how long he'd been in here? He couldn't really remember to tell the truth; he was still coming down from the Kate Beckett high when they loaded up and left for the precinct.

I wonder what kind of questions they're getting right now, can't be getting off lightly like I am, he thought, especially not Montgomery.

He was worried to a degree about Kate and the boys, but he knew they would all be fine. They had followed proper procedure in approaching and securing the scene, it was all just a matter of presenting it as if Castle had just been on the sidelines, hunkering behind Montgomery while the detectives took out the invading force.

He was halfway through writing a pretty emotionally charged scene between Rook and Heat in his head when his focus was interrupted by the brief opening and sharp clang of the interrogation room door closing behind the new member in the room.

"Mister Castle." Her voice was clipped, as if adding the pleasantry was too much work for her to address him as such.

He looked up from his hands that had just finished "writing" on the table, giving her a curt nod as he looked up at her, "Lieutenant Gates."

She crossed the room, pulling the chair opposite him, the unpadded feet scraping against the floor as she brought it to a comfortable position, dropping a manila folder on the table in front of him in the process.

"It would seem, Mister Castle, that your story checks out… for now." She paused for a moment, as if to catch him off-guard with her information, but he showed no indication of shock, just a man who knew the truth was being told, which made her all the more suspicious, but there wasn't much she could do.

She carefully discarded the glasses she had been wearing onto the table as she looked at the writer, "You are free to go, but please Mister Castle," she gave him what he could only ever consider a hyena-esque smile as she spoke, "don't leave town."

He would be pumping his fist in the air right now if it wasn't for the handcuffs that still left him attached to the table in front of him, or the two wounds in his arm, or for the fact that it would make him look a tad bit more guilty than what he was ever suspected of before. But he was proud, and thankful for his team, no… his family, having his back.

Because that's what they were, weren't they? They all got along so well, Ryan and Esposito were probably the best of friends he could ask for, friends that didn't want to be friends with Richard Castle just for the sake of knowing him, or because of his money, or connections.

No, he regarded the two men almost as brothers.

Whereas Montgomery… he had once thought the man to be like a father figure, but right now he wasn't sure where he stood. He still regarded him as a friend, of sorts, and he knew that no one in this life is ever truly innocent, everyone falls once in a while. But that didn't make the pill any easier to swallow. And he could only imagine how Kate felt right now.

Oh.

Kate.

"Is there a chance I could speak with Detective Beckett a moment before I leave the comforts of the Twelfth?"

The lieutenant seemed to ponder his question for a moment, before relenting, producing a key from her pocket and unclasping the handcuffs from his nearly chaffed wrists. "You'll have five minutes, no more, no less."

His wrists were slightly sore, but he still gently rubbed at them, enjoying the sensation of being free as he stood to follow the stoic woman out of the room. "Thank you, Lieutenant Gates."

Instead of responding, she gestured to one of the interview rooms, blinds all shut around it, which was a rare sight to see, even when relatives of victims were brought in to provide any pertinent information in investigations, but this morning was a special case, and he apparently had no idea how special until now.

As he crossed the floor of homicide to his destination at the end of the hallway, he was silently hoping that he truly would get some alone time with her before he left, with no extra officers in the room to intrude on their privacy. But the hope was quickly dying out as he walked along, noticing the extra hustle and bustle on the fourth floor today.

Two officers were standing guard at one of the conference rooms, with all of its blinds pulled down, preventing any outside observers from viewing who was inside. He speculated that Montgomery was probably in there, it would make the most sense to have two officers standing guard for the subject of Internal Affairs' investigation.

When he finally reached the door, he tried to tamp down his excitement to see her again, control the bounce in his step and the seemingly extra breath he never knew he had before. Finally, he resorted to a deep inhale and exhale, before gently rapping his knuckles on the opaque glass window of the door, before stepping into the room.

The first surprise was that there were no other officers in the room, which was doing wonders for his hope of having some privacy. The second, however, was a sight he never thought he'd see, Kate Beckett, pacing, idly chewing her thumbnail as she walked from end to end of the room.

Adorable, was all he could think of as he drank in the sight of her, she was worried, sure, but the pacing and chewing her thumbnail did something to him. Something that he liked.

But then when the door closed behind him, her head shot up to see who had entered the room, and a bright smile broke out across her face when she saw it was him, and he couldn't help but do the same thing as he closed the distance between the two of them, bracketing his hands on her hips when he found himself standing in front of her, then feeling her arms drape over his shoulders in return.

He was half-expecting a kiss, but today was nothing short of plenty of surprises being thrown his way when he found her resting her forehead on his shoulder, dark curls tickling the bottom of his jaw as he rested his chin atop her head.

What a feeling this was, such a warm feeling… a complete feeling.

A kiss, would've been great, but a warm embrace like this? Her head resting in the crook of his neck, breathing in his familiar scent as his nose enjoyed the sweet smell of cherries?

Oh yeah, he could get used to this, real fast.

"Did she tear you a new one too?" Her voice was muffled in his shoulder, but filled with mirth as she asked him.

He couldn't help but let out a small, rich chuckle that he felt reverberate through her. "She tried, but I laid on the 'Castle' charm pretty thick… I'd like to think it worked."

She lifted her head from his chest, rich hazel eyes staring up at him, ripe with skepticism at his statement, but a smile also played at her lips, "Sure Castle, I'm sure it wasn't me and the boys saving your bacon, yet again."

The smile left his face, leaving a pout in its wake, but the humor was still alive and dancing in his azure eyes that stared down at her, "Hey, I thought I did pretty good!"

"I'm sure you did Castle," she patted the side of his cheek, "I'm sure you did."

The playfulness that once danced across her face, had now dropped, in its place stood the token mark of regret, bottom lip lightly tucked into her mouth, before she promptly returned her head to its previous resting place on his chest.

"What's going to happen to him Castle?"

Knowing exactly who she was talking about, he sighed as he pondered what would become of the man.

It wasn't exactly something that was pressing on his mind since there was no threat to his life before now… and IA wasn't involved, tearing up every single possible thing in sight, hoping to catch a thread to tug on and have the whole story fall apart.

The whole situation did not sit well with him, but he knew that everyone had to pay penance for their sins, and Montgomery was no saint unfortunately, but he did come clean with him, and Kate… but the courts and investigators wouldn't see that as any kind of favor in the proceedings of prosecution.

And it wasn't just the precinct that would be affected, Evelyn and the kids would take a toll to him being thrown into prison.

Not to mention all of the time spent in government buildings leading up to the final appointment in court, would certainly take its toll on them, and if IA felt like it, they could call into question his methods of operating the Twelfth Precinct, some prosecutions and arrests while he was Captain there, could be thrown out. But he doubted that.

The whole thought process was making him restless and had manifested itself in the form of rubbing idle circles in Kate's back as she relaxed further into him, silently grateful for his touching comfort.

"I don't know."

He wished he could provide more assurance, but truth be told, there wasn't much he could offer, just his presence, and for now, that seemed to be enough.

He couldn't help but smile, the happiness in him returning at the feeling of having Kate wrapped around him, that fuzzy feeling that encased his heart when she was so close, fleeting thoughts rushing through his mind as he listened… Thoughts about the past, present, and future all had his mind held prisoner, but mostly it was the past, that admittance of feelings in a… bathroom of all places.

He hadn't realized he laughed until she had pulled back from him and looked up at him suspiciously, her eyes flitting between his left and right eye as she was trying to glean any information she could just out of his eyes looking back at her.

"Something you want to share with the class, Castle?"

He looked down at her, smiling brightly, the one that made his eyes nearly disappear when he did, "Nothing, just… thinking about the bathroom confessional."

She smiled back at him, the tip of her tongue just barely sticking out of her cheeky grin, "Not the best place, I admit," she shrugged, "but when have we ever had the best timing?"

"Point taken," he sighed, thinking about all the inopportune times between the two of them over the years, making a compelling argument for her statement. But all that mattered was they wouldn't have those moments anymore, and that thought made Rick happier than any other could've in the last three years, causing an even brighter smile to bust out across his face.

"You know…" he trailed off, allowing his thumbs that rested on her hips to sneak under her jacket, dancing along the bare skin, smiling at her brief gasp at his touch, "We still have a few minutes before Gates will be coming to drag me out of here."

After gaining her composure, Kate just smirked at the writer, playfulness sparking in her eyes, "A few minutes Castle? That's all you can last?"

But before he could reply, the door opened, causing the two to look at each other regretfully before practically flying away from each other as they stared at the door, ready for Gates to enter to escort Castle out of the building.

And she didn't disappoint.

"Mr. Castle… Detective Beckett," nodding as she addressed each of them, before promptly redirecting her attention to the writer.

"It would seem that your mother and daughter are awaiting your presence downstairs, I hope that you were able to talk about whatever it was that you deemed important."

Castle carefully side-eyed Kate, allowing himself one last look before he had to leave her side for heaven knows how long. "Yes sir, I was." He wasn't going to make the mistake of calling her ma'am again, that's for sure, he got a brief lecture from the woman about how to address her, and that wasn't helping his image of the stern woman.

As she turned to leave the room, Castle reached out and grasped Kate's hand, pulling it up to his lips, dusting a kiss to the knuckles on her hand, bringing that shy smile of hers to come shining out that he loved more and more every time he saw it.

With a promise from her that she'd call him when she was finished being grilled for the day, the two parted ways, Castle on the coattails of Lieutenant Gates, silently following her so as to not further disturb her, and Kate sat back down on the couch in the room, waiting for the next round of questions, cracking her fingers one-by-one as she continued to test the limits of her patience.

Regardless of how he felt as he walked away from her, he knew he had some work to do, and his first step was getting his mother and daughter somewhere safe, because if the news vans were any indication when they were leaving, Bracken would have seen that his team failed, and would strike again. And he wasn't sure who was a target, and who wasn't, so he had to prepare, and establish a plan to bring a stop to the vile man, and the thumb drive was the key, according to the captain and the now deceased Smith.

As soon as Castle had stepped into the elevator, he had already felt himself feeling not quite himself riding it down all alone. As of recently, he had been riding it down with Beckett, so it had been quite a while since he had ridden solo downstairs. As the lights ticked down with each floor passed, he found himself rocking back and forth on his feet until the elevator came to an abrupt stop on the first floor.

As soon as the doors had opened, Castle was quickly assaulted by the shouts of his daughter recognizing him, followed by the sight of a flurry of red coming crashing into his chest, arresting him on the spot in the lobby of the precinct, arms wrapped tightly around his chest.

"Hey pumpkin," he wrapped his arms tightly around his daughter as he placed a kiss to the top of her head, happy to have his daughter's hugs back after the past few days.

"Richard darling, you must really stop getting yourself into trouble with the police," the older redhead quipped as she sauntered in a traditional Martha Rodgers style up to her son to envelop him and her granddaughter in a family hug.

"It's good to see you too, Mother," he smiled, happy to have his family there, to know that they were safe, even though there was bound to be quite the discussion after the relief of him being okay had dissipated.

Alexis had remained mostly quiet as she had wrapped herself around her father, still trembling with the fear that she wouldn't see him again after the phone call from Detective Beckett that still echoed in her mind. But she had relaxed more once her dad had started to reaffirm to her that he was okay, that he wasn't going anywhere, that there was no way he'd ever leave his family behind.

Except for the fact that soon, very soon, he would have to do just that. He would have to get them somewhere safe until Bracken was arrested because he still didn't know who the man was targeting, and that mystery was one he wasn't going to let the Senator solve.

"Alexis?" Her dad's soft voice was like music to her ears, causing her to look up at him, blue eyes matching blue eyes as they stared at each other, softness sparking in his eyes as he looked at the most precious thing in his life, but… there was something else lurking in the background, something like… regret?

The moment was not lost on Martha, she had separated herself shortly after the brief family embrace, leaving father and daughter to be together for but an extra moment, but the look she had seen in her son's eyes, she had seen once before, one that she had hoped she'd never see again… ever.

"Richard, what's going on?"

She could see him shifting nervously, lightly transferring weight between each foot as he worked up the courage to say what was on his mind. The sight was almost comical, and in a better situation, it would be, but something was weighing heavy on the writer, and he was struggling to get it out.

Alexis had picked up on what her grams was doing, and if anyone could get something out of him, it would be her, so she'd happily help to get him out of his shell.

"Dad?"

Castle, once again, looked down at his daughter, and at her sweet expression, teetering the line between her own pleading look, and his own signature puppy dog eyes that he'd use occasionally on Beckett, his shoulders sagged and he let out a sharp exhale. He could never fight against that look, ever.

"It's… complicated."

Martha raised an eyebrow at this, clearly not satisfied with his response, "Richard, really? Must we resort to more extreme measures to get you to open up?"

Castle's eyes widened, thinking in the past when the two of them had ganged up on him before, and had in fact, deployed more extreme measures than this, and he was not too keen on repeating that.

"No, no… it's just… I can't quite come home yet." He flinched back after he had finished speaking, squeezing his eyes shut and bracing for the impact from the two redheads.

"But… but you got hurt, and they just found you at the captain's house after going missing, you need to come home Dad." She was pleading once again, but for once, he was going to have to resist it, to keep them safe, he couldn't cave.

"I know pumpkin, I know." He brought his hands to rest on her shoulders, bringing himself down to look at her at eye level, "But, this case… this case has the potential to put us all in danger, and I know how to put a stop to it, so we don't have to worry about it ever again."

Martha sighed, having a semblance of an idea as to what he was doing. It had been a while since it had happened, but she knew what was going to be said next.

Alexis noticed her grandmother's change in attitude, glancing to the side briefly to size up exactly what she was doing, but was stopped by her father speaking again.

"Alexis," he waited for her to face him yet again, resuming when she did, "I need you and your grams to be safe, and that means going somewhere safe, that no one knows about."

Her brow furrowed at that, her dad usually wasn't like this, all cloak-and-dagger, unless he was being goofy about it, but he seemed deadly serious about it now. Plus, he made it sound like he already had another house that neither she nor her grams knew about.

"What are you talking about Dad?"

He knew he had to finish this conversation, but not here, they'll have the rest of it in the car on the way back to the loft, away from prying eyes and ears.

"Mother, did you drive here?"

"Of course I did dear, did you think I'd want to waste time to make sure that my boy was ok?"

He smiled at her sentiment before redirecting his attention to his daughter, "We'll finish talking about this in the car, okay pumpkin?"

The faintest hint of a smile played on the edge of her lips, "Okay Dad, but don't think you're getting off lightly right now," they all started towards the door, ready to get home and away from all the craziness, Martha and Alexis at the front while Rick hung back for a moment, pulling out his phone to send a secure message to Gray before catching back up with his family.

Once they had gotten in the car, Rick climbed in and huffed at the positioning of the driver's seat, shifting his accusatory eyes to his mother, who just shrugged at his gaze. Clearly not going to get anything out of her, he adjusted the seat, returning it to the comfortable position he had grown accustomed to.

Just as he had placed his fingers around the key to start the car, he remembered he needed to make a brief stop before heading home, and thankfully, it was on the way.

Since he was still armed when they had been shoved into the NYPD van, and had the flash drive, he had stashed them in an inconspicuous location in the rear of the van, to avoid any more questioning from IA or accusations, and he needed to retrieve the both of them… now.

He pulled gracefully out of the parking spot that his mother had selected, mind readying for the multitude of questions he was no doubt, about to asked.

"Dad?"

He pulled to a stop at a red light, granting him the opportunity to turn to look at his daughter, "I suppose you want me to finish that conversation we left behind, don't you?"

She just silently nodded to his question, goading him on to continue his tale.

"Alright then," he turned his face back to the road ahead, pressing down on the accelerator as the light turned green, paving the way for him to get to the NYPD garage.

"Before you were born, I used to be in a… different line of work, and I'd happily left that life behind when I found out I was going to be a dad to a beautiful baby girl," he reached his hand across the divide of the seats and grasped his daughter's hand, smiling at her as brightly as he could.

"At least that was the case, until four days ago."

Alexis' eyes went wide at him, but didn't say anything, not yet, anyways. She knew that if she said something now, he'd probably stop dead in his tracks and not bring it up again, and she wasn't about to risk that.

He drew in a sharp breath as he continued, clearly pained at how the situation had panned out, or at least, at first. "It was after that case that I had sent the two of you out of the loft… I had originally planned on enjoying a drink and alone time after a personal revelation, but then my phone rang."

He chuckled as he recalled the memory, "If it was who I thought it was on the phone, I was probably going to either throw the phone across the room, or happily answer it, but then I realized it wasn't my phone that was ringing."

At this, Alexis' eyebrow raised in question, no longer keeping up with her father if it wasn't his phone that he had heard ringing, and obviously answering, she thought that maybe, just maybe, it might've been Detective Beckett's phone, but quickly squished that thought because she had called Alexis just yesterday morning on her personal phone.

But her father was quick to finish the story.

"It took me a minute, but I realized it was one of the few remaining things that connected me to that past life, one that was a lifeline, so to speak." He shrugged, "But I don't know what good it does as a lifeline if when I answer it, it gets me involved in something like this."

He mindlessly made a left turn, making it obvious to the two redheads that he wasn't heading to the loft, which was concerning based on the conversation they were having.

"Richard, darling, where are we going?"

Castle glanced into the rear-view mirror to look at his mother, "Sorry, I've got to grab something just up here before we go home."

The two inwardly sighed at the new relief that he admitted it was time to go home after this little jaunt of his, especially after he said that he wasn't going to.

That was until they saw he had pulled into a parking spot opposite a parking garage that had NYPD plastered along the side of the building, sharing a glance to each other, silently agreeing that whatever he was about to do was a bad idea, turned to face him but already found he had quickly slipped out of the vehicle, letting the door shut behind him as he ran across the street.

"Grams?" She turned to face her grandmother in the back seat, hunched over the armrest as she looked at her, "What's going on with dad?"

Martha had remained mostly silent during the car ride, leaving the discussion between the two in the front, and she was going to stay that way unless she was dragged into the conversation, but it never happened, so she was content to watch the streets fly effortlessly by as Castle drove along.

"Alexis… your father, like he said, lived a different life before you came along." Alexis nervously nodded her head, clearly thinking that she was about to get some life-changing news about her dad, "How different?"

She sighed, "Oh kiddo, if you have anything like your father's imagination, I'm sure it's running reckless and wild right now so let me stop you there, right now." Once any traces of the nervousness she saw, at least, the hand-trembling kind, was gone, she pressed on.

"Do you remember when he killed off Derrick Storm? How he had said it was becoming too much like a 'job' to write about him?"

Alexis furrowed her brow at her grandmother choosing to talk now about her dad's books, "Yeah? But what does that have to do with this?"

Martha smiled at Alexis, clearly her intelligence was not putting the pieces together of her father and his literary alter-ego. "Well darling, it is hard to write about something like that when you don't have new experiences to draw from."

Happy with that little breadcrumb, she watched her grandchild's confusion deepen, and a bit of resignation because Martha wasn't going to spell it out for her, because after all, where's the fun in that?

Martha wished that she had a timer because at this rate, Alexis wasn't going to figure it out before her dad returned to the car from whatever it was that he was-

But her thoughts were interrupted by Castle barging in through the driver's side door, slightly winded from his sprint from across the street to the car.

"Alright, you two ready?" He pulled the seatbelt down and attached it to his seat, turning to check on his other passengers.

"Ready to go, kiddo." Martha piped from the backseat.

Alexis, however, was still facing her grandmother, out of her seatbelt and clearly not ready to leave, mind still running rampant with what it was that her grandmother was hinting at, and her father both. She was still fixated on what Martha had said about how Castle got tired of writing about Storm when it felt like a job, did Martha mean what Alexis thought she was insinuating? Did her father really stop writing Storm and kill him off because he wanted to sever ties with that part of his past?

Well, if it was, she was about to find out after she had twisted back around and strapped herself back into the seat.

"Dad?"

He turned his head to glance at her, "Yeah?"

"Are you a spy?"

A/N: Yeah, this one took too long, I'm sorry for that. Writer's block actually hit me pretty hard for this chapter, but I've got plenty of ideas for what's coming next. I knew I needed to get Castle back with Alexis and Martha, and now seemed like a pretty good time. Next chapter will have a little bit of everything, especially something to do with that little text Castle sent to Gray, I wonder what that'll be about? As always, reviews are appreciated and I hope I can get the next one to you fine people sooner. Have a great weekend everyone!