TDAD Book 4: Star Light, Star Bright

by TheSojournReader

I wish I may, I wish I might...make it through the darkest night. Rachel has to fight; for her dreams and for her health. But no one said she can't have a little fun along the way. This is the fourth book of my To Dream a Dream series.

21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21 (NOT the final chapter...next chapter is the last, I swear)

"What about him? Is he okay?!"

The world around her swims as anxiety fills her. She feels a steadying hand on her arm. Brittany is by her side, looking as worried as she feels. Finn went out for a jog. He should be back by now. Why isn't he back by now?

"He's turning into a boring adult." Noah grumbles.

Rachel blinks. "….what?"

"He's old enough to drink but doesn't get drunk much at all and barely goes out to bars. All he talks about is the wedding and careers and best places to live with kids and other stupid stuff." He stops ranting and stares at her desperately. "But I have an idea to save him."

"Save him?" She's a little lightheaded and her emotions are swirling thanks to the complete 180 Noah forced them to do.

"We should move out. Me and Finn and Sam. Get a place of our own, just us guys."

"Dammit, Noah, you scared the shit out of me." Rachel releases a slow breath, her heartbeat returning to normal. "Have you talked to Finn about this yet?"

"Well, no. He's so whipped he won't do anything without your approval."

"He's not whipped, he knows how to be respectful and be a partner in a relationship." Brittany snaps. "Not that you'd know what that's like."

Rachel shakes her head. "Talk to him yourself. If he wants to move out, he'll come to me and we'll discuss it. I won't stop him if it's what he truly wants."

Noah looks surprised. "You won't?"

"No, Noah. I won't get in the way of Finn's happiness. Or yours, for that matter. I love you both too much to do that. I won't like it, but I'll accept it. Besides, once we're married we'll be living together in our own home. And that's probably less than two years away."

He smiles. "Right! You'll live together the rest of your lives. Give me a year with my best friend."

"Once again, you have to talk to him about it. And if he says no, don't bug him about it. Let it go."

"Fine. That's fair."

The girls roll their eyes and head out of the kitchen. The girls roll their eyes and head out of the kitchen. They're stopped yet again, this time by Rachel's phone ringing. She pulls it out of her pocket and continues up the stairs to put her nail stuff away. A glance at the screen tells her it's Finn calling. She smiles.

"Hey! I thought you'd be back by now." She says cheerfully into the phone.

"Uh, yeah…" Finn starts "I planned to be. Sorry."

"No big deal. I was just a little worried." She slides the bin onto the shelf and flops on her bed. "So why are you calling instead of just coming home? Noah wants to talk to you about something he feels is very important."

"I'll talk to him. Could you, uh, come pick me up?"

Rachel sits up with a frown. "Sure. Why, though?"

"Um….I just….they won't let me leave without a ride."

"They who? What's going on, Finn? Where are you?"

"I'm fine. I'm perfectly fine. But can you come pick me up from the hospital? The same one you were at a couple years ago."

"The hospital?! Are you okay? Finn, what happened? What's going on?" She demands even as she rushes to grab sandals and her purse. She doesn't even bother checking her hair or clothes in this moment. All she cares about is getting to Finn as quickly as possible and making sure he's okay.

"A car ran a red light and hit me."

"You got hit by a car?!" Her motions freeze as her brain processes this horrifying news.

"Well not exactly. It was a low sports car so as soon as I saw it I was able to jump up so the bumper didn't hit my legs, but then I landed on the hood. They hit their breaks and I was thrown off the car and into the street. But the way everyone else on the street saw it made it look like I got hit dead on, so they panicked and called an ambulance and wouldn't let me leave without being checked over. Paramedics came….I was hoping it was Sam but it wasn't….."

By this point in his story, she's already downstairs and ready to go. It sounds like he's fine, but just in case he needs to lean on someone, it should really be someone bigger than her. With that in mind, she snatches the slice of pizza from Noah's hands and drops it back on the plate.

"Wha—" He glares at her, which only intensifies after she slaps a hand over his mouth, halting his question.

She glares back, lifting the phone so she can whisper to him. "Call a cab and put on shoes. Finn is in the hospital."

All irritation leaves his face and he jumps up to follow her directions. She continues listening to Finn's story.

"The paramedics said I look fine, just a few scratches, nothing serious. I don't even need stitches. But because all the witnesses said I was hit dead on by the car, they demanded I go to the hospital to get X-rays. Luckily I didn't even have to wait. They had an opening and took me right in. They took one of my head, torso, and legs. Just to make sure they weren't missing anything. All came back clean. No breaks. I don't even have any bruises yet, but they said I'll probably be bruised tomorrow. Only one scratch needed a bandage! I'm fine! But they won't let me leave alone. I need a ride."

"Why didn't you call sooner?" She can't help but ask. "I would have sat with you while waiting for the X-ray results."

"They took my clothes and phone when I first got here and I only got them back after the X-rays. And I didn't want to call and worry you. I wanted to be able to call and say with complete certainty that I'm completely fine."

"I'd rather be worried but know what's going on." She's distracted by Noah getting her attention. He jerks his head towards the door. Nodding, she follows him and they get in a cab. "I want to always be there for you."

"You are. And as soon as I was able to call, I did. Okay? You were my first and only call and you're coming, right?"

"I'm already in a cab. I'm bringing Noah because just in case you need to lean on someone to walk, it should be someone bigger than me. I don't want to risk not being able to keep you standing."

"I can walk on my own, I promise. But thanks. I love you."

"I love you, too." Her eyes well up but she blinks away the tears. He's fine. They hang up and she releases a heavy sigh, her head dropping back against the seat.

Noah nudges her. "Hey. Gonna tell me what's going on, now?"

"Sorry, yeah. He got hit by a car that ran a red light."

"Oh, shit!"

"Yeah, but he's saying he's fine. He says it was a low sports car and he was able to jump up to avoid the bumper hitting his legs but landed on the hood and was thrown off when the car slammed on their breaks. He had X-rays and they came back fine. Nothing broken, no stitches, just some scratches. He's fine." She repeats this as much for her own benefit as his. He's fine.

They get to the hospital and enter the emergency room. They're directed to a cubicle where Finn is already dressed and playing a game on his phone. He looks up when they enter and smiles.

"Hey!"

Even knowing he's fine, Rachel finds her emotions getting the better of her. She swallows down some tears and blinks to clear her eyes. Still, she can feel her face shifting with her battle to keep calm. Finn's expression softens.

"I'm okay."

She nods as she comes closer. He quickly gets off the bed and reaches for her. She halts him with a gentle hand. "Are you hurt anywhere that'll be made worse by me hugging you?

"No. I swear."

Needing no more prompting, she throws herself at him, hugging him tight. He holds her and rubs her back, whispering that he's sorry for scaring her and he's fine over and over. She hears him and focuses on listening to his heart and calming her breathing. Finn pulls back and kisses her gently.

"I promise that I'm fine. They're only super-fickle wounds."

The corner of her mouth tugs up. "Superficial."

"Oh. Right."

She can tell from his eyes that he knew the right word and said the wrong thing on purpose, trying to get her to smile and relax.

Finn gently rubs her back. "I can still tell how upset you are. I'm sorry this scared you. I'm fine. Please relax."

She nods slowly. The way Noah started his conversation right before having Finn call and tell her he was in the hospital made her overreact. It shook her to her core. Losing him…that's something she'd never survive. Not really. Finn is given a couple ice packs for where they suspect he'll be sore tomorrow, told to take it easy for a day or two, and released. At home, he regales the others with his heroic and highly exaggerated tale of jumping over a speeding car. They all had a good laugh through his story and everyone calmed down knowing he's truly fine. Rachel felt better sharing a bed with Finn. She woke up several times during the night. She'd roll over if her back was to him and make sure he's still alive and breathing. Only then would she be able to fall back to sleep, letting his deep breaths lull her.

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"Leave Rachel?" Finn asks, baffled by the request.

"No," Puck groans "not leave her, just….leave the house."

"Leave the house I already live in with her. So not get to live with my fiancé."

"Duuude you're not seeing the bigger picture. You're gonna get married in the next two years, right?"

"Right."

"Meaning you two will be moving out and getting your own place. Meaning we don't have much time to live together just us dudes. Three unmarried bros, no girls around, just hanging out. We can drink and play our games as loud as we want and no girl is gonna screech at us to turn it down."

Finn wavers. He likes the idea of living with just his best guy friends. Like a bachelor pad, except he's not a bachelor. Their own man cave before he gets married and shares everything with his wife. But he hates the idea of not living in the same house as her. He also hates not having her sneak into his room in the middle of the night. His favorite way to fall asleep is with her in his arms. Then again, he'll get that the rest of his life. Never again will he have an opportunity to live with just Puck and Sam. He ponders this for a minute before responding.

"Lemme talk to Rach." When Puck jumps up and stars pumping his fist into the air, Finn makes an important point. "Look, I like the idea of it. But only for like a year. Or until the wedding. Whatever comes first."

Puck shrugs. "Dude, why don't you, me, and Sam live in an apartment nearby until you get married? Then, after the wedding, we'll move back here and you and Berry can live in the apartment until you find a better place for the two of you."

Finn smiles. "I like that idea. Just let me talk it over with Rachel."

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As it's his senior year and he's been taking classes to become a teacher, two large chunks of this year will be spent student teaching. They call them internships at his college. Since he only wants high school gym, his internships will be at two different high schools in the city. He'll have a mentor teacher and learn about writing lesson plans and actually teaching kids. Finn is excited. And he's excited that he's excited. He'd been so worried that he'd get to this point and realize he'd made a mistake and should have been a mechanic instead, that to find he's excited about being a teacher makes him happy.

Sam is doing well at his job and mostly enjoying it. He often needs to vent and unwind at home from sad or horrifying sights at work, but he bounces back fast. He's on a tough schedule at the moment. He lives at the station for 48 straight hours, then he's off for 48 hours, then back on for 72. After a couple cycles of this, he's given a four day leave to rest. Other than occasionally groaning that he should have become a model instead, he's happy.

Puck is getting by with his job. He's started taking classes at the same college as Finn. His classes are focusing on handling finances for businesses and that sort of thing. That way he's better prepared once he branches out and starts his own business. He also still talks to his younger half-brother frequently. They visit from time to time, but mostly just talk on the phone. He's happier now that Finn and Sam agreed to move out with him. Rachel kept true to her word and didn't stop Finn. They had a long discussion about it. Neither really want to be separated, but Finn admitted to wanting to live with his best friends for a while. Just a year, he promised. Rachel explained that she's well aware that everyone moved into this house together specifically to take care of her so she could go to college in another state while sick. Given a choice, they probably would have split up to live in smaller groups from the start. Now they stay together because they're used to it and happy. So if anyone isn't happy, it makes sense for there to be a change. With that in mind, she made sure he'll still keep up with their weekly dates and help with wedding planning, then agreed to it. The others don't mind since that'll give them more room. They're not going far, either. Literally two blocks down is a big apartment building. It's nothing fancy. In fact, it's quite rustic and open. A large studio, really. They'll actually need to put up their own temporary walls so they have their own separate "rooms" to sleep in. The only real room with privacy is the bathroom. The guys don't mind any of it. They think it'll be a great experience. And since they're close to the others, they can still get together frequently and see each other all the time.

Santana has decided she doesn't have the temperament to be a nurse, so she's going into Child Protective Services. She wants to track people down, spy on people and report back, and get to "call them out on their shit". She never got to do it to Rachel's father, though she always wanted to. Now, she'll get to do it…..professionally…..to other failing parents. Quinn is going to work in public relations. Brittany and Mike are both well on their ways to becoming professional dancers. Blaine and Rachel are obviously on track to be on Broadway one day. Kurt still wants Broadway, but has been picking up more hours at and doing well with his fashion ideas. He enjoys it just as much as he enjoys performing. Tina is working on becoming an actress and talking a lot to Artie, who is still enjoying his film and directing classes at the Brooklyn Film Academy. Mercedes is still working hard on being a pop singer, not letting that dream go.

Everyone has their paths chosen and are working on making it happen. And everyone supports everyone else.

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Sue Sylvester admires Rachel's ambitious idea. But now that she's in the thick of it, trying to make it happen, she's a little overwhelmed. Not that she'll tell Rachel that. No. She'll make this happen for the girl and make it seem like it was a breeze. Her list is growing. It took weeks just to figure out how to start her search, but it's finally starting to pay off.

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Kurt burst into Rachel's room dragging Blaine behind him. His boyfriend is laughing, both men looking excited. Rachel quirks an eyebrow and sets her pencil down. She's been working on writing her own songs as part of one of her music classes.

"The fact that you haven't come running to me yet means you haven't heard. I can't believe you haven't heard! You!" Kurt rambles excitedly.

"What are you talking about, Kurt?"

"Funny Girl!" Blaine says eagerly.

Rachel's eyes narrow. "What about it?"

"They're reviving it on Broadway!"

"Oh my god, seriously?! That's awesome! When?" She bounces excitedly. It's her favorite show, after all. "And who is starring in it?"

Kurt sits on the bed next to her. "That's the best part. They're holding open auditions."

She gasps and the boys smile widely at her. "Really?"

"Really. Let's go sign up!" Blaine says eagerly.

"But NYADA—"

"Encourages us to audition, you know that. Blaine and I auditioned last year for that show and never got callbacks, remember? The one you refused to go to because you were too busy being TA for two professors?"

"I remember." She rolls her eyes. "Open auditions for Funny Girl?" The boys wait with anticipation before she finally smiles back. "Alright. It'll be a good experience to audition. Let's do it."

The boys squeal and hug her.

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Of course she called her mom for advice on what song to sing for her audition.

"Honey, you can't do Barbra for your audition."

"What? Mom, no! Fanny Brice is the most iconic role. This is the only way to do it."

"Yeah, Hamlet's an iconic role, and it's been done differently and successfully by Laurence Olivier, Kenneth Branagh, Richard Burton, Keanu Reeves—"

"Okay, Hamlet is different. This is Fanny."

"Yes, and they cast Barbra as Fanny because she was one of a kind. She was an original. If the producers are smart, they're not gonna be looking for some carbon copy. They're gonna want a fresh interpretation, someone that can put their own stamp on the role."

Irritated and completely thrown, Rachel stammers for a response. "Well, I've been going through Barbra's entire repertoire, so—"

"It's okay. You have time. We'll find something. I'll help you. You need to find a song that means something to you. Something that'll inspire you."

In the end, it was Finn who helped her the most.

"You're one of the most unique talents in the world. You always shine your brightest when you do something personal, something intimately important that defines you. So just do something that takes you back to the roots of your passion. That's what people want to see, and that's what makes the best impression. Make those producers fall in love with you in that moment on the stage. And I know you have it in you."

Rachel blinks. "Wow. Thank you. That was perfect advice."

"You'll be great."

Her first thought was "We Are Young" by fun. It's very personal. However, it's best as a group number with harmonies. Not being able to harmonize with anyone detracts from it in her mind. She thinks back further, to her roots. Glee club, obviously. Then she grins, knowing what to sing. Shaking off her nerves and knowing it's just an audition and that it's highly unlikely anything will come of it, she auditions by singing "Don't Stop Believing" as a solo. She tried to see it as a performance instead of an audition and that helped settle her down and just enjoy herself. When she got nervous at the beginning, she imagined Finn playing the drums, Artie playing guitar, and Kurt and the others standing behind her, all of them singing along as back up. Just imagining it gave her a boost of courage and joy. It felt good. It was fun. Until the song was done and she was standing on a stage alone in a silent theater with several adults staring at her blankly. Her stomach sunk.

"Well, thank you, Ms…" She glances down at the paper on the desk "…Berry. That was something….quite different."

The old man sitting beside the woman interrupts and reaches for the microphone. "Sorry. Rachel, suddenly something happened to you in the middle of the song. What was going on there?"

"I was thinking about my friends. Um, how I wouldn't be the person I am today standing in front of you, doing what I'm doing right now, if they hadn't shown me that I could. If they hadn't believed in me. If they hadn't supported me all these years, through everything life threw at me."

That drew smiles from the producers. She got a far more sincere "Thank you" from the female producer.

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Classes resumed as usual. Life resumed as usual. Rachel is both enjoying her time at NYADA and also looking forward to being done with it. She wants to get on stage and start that part of her life. She wants to marry Finn. They keep talking about when they should hold the wedding but haven't decided yet. They're both pretty busy, so wedding planning now is minimal at best. Thankfully, Kurt is helping. And Quinn is helping by toning down Kurt's more elaborate ideas. The only thing set in stone is the general location; they're going to get married back in Lima. It'll be easier for their families and other friends to join them. They've narrowed down themes and color schemes, but haven't fully committed to one yet. Rachel likes fancy. Finn likes rustic. Kurt is trying to fuse the two.

And then, weeks later, she got a call from one of the producers. She and Kurt had been in the kitchen baking cookies when her phone rang and she panicked. Kurt had to remind her to actually answer it. He listened anxiously to her vague side of the conversation. Then she hung up and turned to face him. She looked dumbstruck.

"That was one of the producers."

"And?" Kurt asks eagerly, quickly swallowing the bit of cookie he'd eaten.

"And I got a callback for Fanny!"

"You did it!"

The siblings grab each others arms and jump up and down laughing and shouting. Rachel kept repeating that she got a callback and how happy she is. Kurt kept repeating "you did it!" Their shouting drew everyone else that still lives in the house (Blaine, Brittany, and Santana). They all jumped around and hugged, cheering for her success. She ran all the way to Finn's apartment to tell him in person. The boys congratulated her happily. Then Finn kicked the other two out of the apartment, locked the door behind them, swept Rachel into his arms, and carried her to his bedroom.

Looking up at him as he pulls her clothes off, Rachel raises an eyebrow. "Are you gonna do this after every callback I get?"

"Absolutely." Finn declares. He gets the last of her clothing off and begins the process of taking off his own. Rachel poses for him on the bed. Seeing it, he stumbles, his feet catching in the legs of his pants as he attempts to kick them off. He tears off his remaining clothes and climbs on top of her. She starts laughing and he frowns until she points down. One foot is still trapped in his pants and dragging the inside out clothing onto the bed with them. "Fuck." He growls, kicking it off.

She only stops laughing when he kisses her. After, they hold one another's sweaty bodies and enjoy the quiet. Finn lightly strokes her bare back.

"You'll be great. You'll get it." He says softly.

"I'm 20. I haven't graduated NYADA yet. I have no stage experience outside of Glee."

"But you were born for the stage. You know it. Everyone who has heard you sing knows it." Finn whispers passionately.

She smiles at him softly. "I really don't think I'll get it, but I'll audition like hell." He chuckles at that, knowing she can do no less. "I'm looking at it as an incredible learning experience."

Finn smirks. "But it'd be awesome to get the role."

"Of Fanny Brice? It'd be a dream come true. Thank you. For believing in me."

"Always."

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Rachel convinces the others to keep her callback quiet and just among the framily. And no family outside of her parents. She doesn't want the added stress of their hopes and/or expectations, no matter how well meaning. She practices singing as often as she gets. When she's not doing that, she's running lines. She has plenty of friends around to read lines with her, but sometimes she likes going through them on her own. One such moment, she's reading lines while pacing in one of the dance studios. Cassandra July walks in.

"Well, well. If it isn't Little Miss David Schwimmer."

Rachel sighs. Cassie only calls her that once in a while now, and never seriously. However, it does signify that the woman is unhappy with her. Clearly the woman found out about her callback and isn't happy she didn't hear it from Rachel herself. "I'm sorry. I thought that I reserved this room."

"So you could stare at yourself in the mirror and run lines for your Funny Girl callback? You know this isn't normal, right? Running lines in the mirror isn't a typical step in the acting process. Actors less narcissistic than yourself actually prefer to rehearse with other actors." The woman teases.

"Who told you about my callback?"

"April Rhodes, of course. You know we're besties. She was having lunch with a woman who happens to be one of the producers of Funny Girl. They got chatting and the woman said some NYADA senior no one's ever heard of was slated to read for producers on Wednesday. And then I thought to myself, 'April can't be talking about Schwimmer. Schwimmer has her dance midterm that day.'"

"Please, Ms. July—" Rachel goes the more formal route to avoid making the woman think she's pulling on their friendship to benefit herself. "I cannot miss this callback, okay? This is a once in a lifetime opportunity."

"Right. I wouldn't dream of you missing it. In the meantime, I'm gonna change your midterm to tomorrow morning."

"What?"

"You heard me, David. 6:00 a.m. tomorrow morning you will perform the solo of the second act of Balanchine's 1941 masterpiece Concerto Barocco, which is widely regarded as the most difficult ballet routine ever devised while you're widely regarded as having one of the puffiest morning faces of any known human. It's gonna be a great combination."

Seeing the way Cassandra is smirking at her, Rachel realizes that it's okay for her to act how she usually does when it's just the two of them. She groans.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Seriously, I think it'll be good for you to get the midterm over with and one less thing to worry about. And why didn't you just tell me this yourself? Why'd I have to hear it from April? Who, by the way, swears she put in a good word for you."

"NYADA encourages us to audition and get outside acting experience, but nothing that interferes with our classes. And this directly interferes with my classes."

"True. But this is bigger than what most other students audition for. They're usually members of the choir, which is impressive enough. You're up against just two other girls for the lead role."

"But 6:00 a.m.?"

"Deal with it."

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They walk down the hall together, heading to Cassie's dance studio. "I didn't get my coffee this morning, so when you do inevitably face flop like a rag doll, at least, I don't know, try to make me laugh."

"I can try to land on a pie or a Whoopi cushion, if you'd prefer." Rachel deadpans.

"Nah. Too much hassle." Cassie pushes open the door and indicates that Rachel should walk through first.

Rachel is startled by how many other students are in the room. She looks around in confusion, trying to figure out if Cassie made everyone move their midterm to 6:00 a.m. just so they'd be annoyed with her or not.

"What's this?"

"This is your midterm."

"I don't understand."

"This is NYADA. We are the best of the best. And make no mistake, we will crush you to get the role ourselves. But we are also family. We get through it together and we celebrate each other when there's big news. And this is big news. You've danced your way through the fire for three years, going on four, and you're still standing tall. So we're gonna get you through this midterm so you can kick some NYADA ass at your first big Broadway callback!"

Everyone around her starts clapping and cheering, some holding up signs of support. Rachel laughs, hands over her mouth, overwhelmed by the unexpected support. "Oh, my God."

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The whole thing was a blur. She remembers sitting in the chair in the hallway, trying to keep her heart from leaping out of her chest. Then she was led into the room. She recalls blurry faces of many, so many, people sitting at tables facing her. Why are there so many people? And then the music started. It filled her. It settled her then lifted her up and she sang her heart out. This was followed by absolute silence. She waits. A smile.

"Thank you, Rachel. We'll let you know."

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Shelby paces their living room while talking on the phone. Scott is no longer paying attention to the football game; he is now far more invested in his wife's side of the phone call.

"Which is a great idea, but we don't have the funds to make it happen…." She rolls her eyes while listening to the response. "…..I know Rachel really wants this to happen, but we still have to be reasonable. We're not able to dish out that much money for this. If we had that much spare money, we'd be donating it to the foundation for a cure, not—I know…No…yes, I'm sure…Well no, not everyone is going to be interested and that's fine…It's fine, Sue!…No we can't force them!"

Shelby abruptly stops pacing and pinches the bridge of her nose. "No, Sue. We can't bribe people. Rachel will understand, I promise."

Scott grins, imaging Sue Sylvester pacing her own home as the two women talk. Shelby starts pacing again and turns away from him, only to stop again, her body going rigid.

"And no blackmail or guilt trips! I'm serious, Sue!"

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The wait is agonizing. The others help distract her with more wedding planning and her professors distract her with, well, classwork. She distracts herself by using the free sing class to vent her emotions. Or Callbacks on Friday nights. Or just around the house she'll break out into song and the others join her. Or yell at her to shut up, depending on what time it is. There are times she gets annoyed that Finn isn't living in the same house as her anymore, but knowing they'll be married and living together for the rest of their lives helps her settle down and let it go. He's having fun living it up living with just "the guys" for a year. She can give him that. And they still do their weekly dates and find time for just them. And then she got a call from one of the producers asking her to come in; not for another audition, but for a talk. Confused, hopeful, and still believing she has zero shot at the role as an armature, she went.

"I'm not gonna lie, Rachel." Rupert Campion, the director, says. "We're impressed with your talent but concerned about your lack of experience. You're very green."

"Well I do hope to play Elphaba one day." Rachel quips nervously, then regrets it and clears her throat. "I know I don't have any real experience. But I have the talent and the drive. I take direction well and I'm eager. I've also won NYADA's Winter Showcase every year since I was a freshman. I promise, you won't regret choosing me."

Mr. Campion and the producers share looks that Rachel can't quite read. Amusement? Disbelief? The man turns back to her and smiles.

"Luckily for you, April Rhodes has been singing your praises to us. While she's not part of this show in any way, we've all worked with her at some point and we respect her opinion. So…..congratulations, Rachel Berry. You got the role of Fanny Brice on Broadway."

A breeze could have knocked her over. Stunned, she blinks hard and attempts to swallow despite her dry mouth. "I—I got it? I got the part?"

"You got the part."

She feels the smile spread across her face and she begins to laugh, tears of happy disbelief welling up in her eyes. The others clap for her, smiling warmly. She thanks them profusely, once again swearing that she won't let them down. They have her sign some paperwork, which they took their time explaining to her since she's never had to do anything like this before. She frowns at the page detailing rehearsals.

"Rehearsals start early January?"

"That is correct. Six to eight hours a day, depending on what we're focusing on."

Nervously, she looks to Rupert. "Mr. Campion…..not to sound ungrateful or anything, but…this means I can't finish at NYADA. This is my senior year."

He sighs. "That is true. This will be your priority. Your job. This is the career you're choosing, correct? You're just starting it sooner than your classmates."

"Is that going to be a problem for you?" One producer asks her snippily.

"No, ma'am. I'm prepared to drop NYADA for this role." Her stomach twists slightly. She came so close to graduating…

"Good. We'll have you come in in a couple weeks to meet the rest of the cast and do some table reads, alright? Until then, wrap up whatever you need to at NYADA so that you can focus on this show."

"I will."

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Rachel took a taxi to Finn's apartment. On the way, she called her mom.

"Hi, honey, how's it going?"

Her fingers are twisting the material of her shirt. She responds quietly, unintentionally hushed by her continued awe. "I got the part."

There's a moment of stunned silence on the other line. "You—you got Fanny? Oh my God, Rachel, I'm so proud of you! I'm so happy for you! You did it! You made it on Broadway!"

"Well, I got a part on Broadway. I haven't made it just. I haven't even attended a single rehearsal yet. Speaking of, it means I'm going to have to drop out of NYADA."

"Oh….yeah, I suppose you will. That's a shame. But honey, it's worth it."

"I know. It just….that part kind of sucks. The rest is amazing."

They talk until the taxi pulls up to Finn's apartment building. Sam is working, she knows. She also knows that Finn is here but is uncertain if Noah is here. She'd much prefer to talk to Finn in private and there's very little privacy in their studio. She walks up the stairs to their floor, still in a slight daze. She got Fanny. She got Fanny. She got the lead role of a popular Broadway show on her first try, before even graduating NYADA. She never even had to work her way up from a chorus member first. Just straight to the leading lady. She knocks on the large door and Noah rolls it open.

"Wassup my Jewish American Princess?"

She smiles at him. "Hi, Noah. Things are good. Can I talk to Finn first?"

"Oh, the fiancé. Of course you're not here to see old Puck."

"You're calling yourself old now? And you said Finn was turning into a boring adult? I think you were just worried that you're turning into a boring adult at 21."

His eyes widen and his shoulders tense. "You take that back!"

"Or what? Gonna prove me right by lecturing me?" She teases.

Noah turns his expression into one of mock rage and charges her. She laughs and tries to get away. He's faster and grabs her, tossing her over his shoulder. He carries her to the kitchen, where he sets her down. Finn looks up from his snack and his face brightens at the sight of her.

"Tell your woman to watch her mouth."

"Tell your best friend to stop calling himself old."

Noah jokingly glares at her, then points two fingers fingers at his eyes, then at her.

Finn comes closer and rests his hands on her waist. "I didn't think I'd get to see you today."

They both ignore the mutter of "sap" from Noah as he leaves the room.

"Yeah, well, something came up."

"What?"

"The Funny Girl director asked me to come in to talk."

Finn looks at her expectantly. She stays quiet, finding herself unable to speak. His brow furrows and he looks at her closely. Then his eyes widen.

"You got the role."

"How did you—"

"You got Fanny!"

"Yeah, but how—"

Finn sweeps her into his arms. "You did it! I knew you'd get it!"

She laughs and they embrace. Then the tears come pouring down her face. "I actually got a leading role on Broadway, performing in my favorite show as my favorite character. I haven't graduated NYADA yet and I'm not even old enough to drink yet! What if I fail? What if I do horribly? What if I let them down? What if—"

Lips press to hers, cutting her off. Finn deepens the kiss, gently guiding her backwards until she bumps into the kitchen counter. He only pulls back when she's breathless.

"You are Rachel Barbra Berry. You are insanely talented and hard working. You earned this. You deserve it. And you will do a fabulous job. I have no doubt about that. You're already a star. Now everyone else gets to see it."

"I couldn't do this without your support." She whispers.

And then she tugs him down and kisses him. Her hands move to the waistband of his jeans and unbutton them. As she unzips them, he gently grabs her hand.

"Whoa, hey, not that I don't want to, but Puck is here."

"So be quiet."

He smirks. "I know I can be, but can you? Cause normally, you get pretty damn loud."

"Shut up and kiss me."

"Yes, ma'am."

She frees him from his pants, puts her hands on his shoulders, and jumps, knowing he'll catch her. He adjusts her on his waist more comfortably for both of them. He slides into her, her skirt helping keep everything hidden. Which turns out to be a good thing.

"Ahem. I just…want a beer. Pardon me."

Noah pushes past them and opens the fridge, grabbing a beer. He purposely takes his time opening it and teasingly asks "So, how's it going?"

Rachel buries her face in Finn's shoulder. Finn growls his response to his roommate. "Great. Go away."

"And blast the tv? Got it." He winks.

Rachel snorts, amused despite herself. Finn pushes her back against the fridge and she gasps, all humor forgotten. At least until the bottles in the fridge begin clinking with every thrust. Then she's back to stifling a laugh. Finn pauses his actions with a sigh.

"We need our own place."

"As soon as we're married. But for now—"

"My room."

After making sure her skirt is still covering everything, Finn moves them to his room and lays on the bed. Noah was true to his word and is blasting some action movie. That allows Finn and Rachel to focus on their own action.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"You've been gone a long time." Blaine comments upon her return. "How long was that meeting?"

"Um, it was a while, but then I made a stop before coming home."

Santana breezes into the room. "Hhmm. Wild bed head hair, clothing askew, and rosy cheeks? Gee, I wonder what stop you made."

Rachel rolls her eyes. "Yes, fine, I went to see my fiancé."

"See or screw?"

"Both, obviously." Brittany tacks on.

"Et tu, Britt?"

"I don't know what that means." The blonde frowns.

"I want to know why you went to him before coming here." Kurt comments, setting dinner on the table.

"Because I wanted to celebrate with Finn."

Everyone freezes. "Celebrate? Does that mean—"

"I got the part!" She squeals.

They jump around the kitchen squealing, laughing, and hugging.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel is both grateful and nervous about how NYADA handled the news of her landing the leading role on a Broadway show. They praised and congratulated her. Then they sat down to work out how they can help her graduate NYADA without interfering with her rehearsal schedule or cutting graduation requirements. They looked through the standards needed to be met before graduation and decided that a bunch of them could technically be met by her rehearsals and the fact that she's going to be a freaking leading lady on Broadway in a matter of months. Her schedule will be hectic; she imagines she'll be tired a lot. But it'll all be worth it in the end. Carmen Tibideaux made a point of telling Rachel that she won't be getting a golden invitation to the Winter Showcase this year, considering she'll be too busy and already has a job lined up. Rachel was fine with that. She won three years in a row, after all. She talked it over with her framily, too. She wanted to warn them she might get snippy in the near future and asked them to be forgiving but to also gently call her out on it when necessary. Finn had another concern.

"Babe, we've been planning for a wedding with no date. Why don't we set a date for after the show opens, so that it doesn't interfere with rehearsals and stuff? We can even stop wedding planning for a while so you're not pulled in so many different directions."

Rachel bites her lip, thinking it over. It's reasonable and would probably be the best option. Despite this, she can't let go of a different thought.

"I—I was thinking about our wedding, too. And how the show is now kind of…taking up a lot of time. But on the other hand…..I—I keep thinking about opening night and starring on Broadway and my name in lights and all the announcements and advertisements."

"What about all that?"

"I want the name they announce to be yours. I mean, to be mine, my married name. The name I'll have for the rest of my life. I don't want my first show to be starred in by Rachel Berry but all others be Rachel Hudson."

"Didn't you talk about Berry being your stage name for a while?"

"That was back in high school. I want your name and only your name. Rachel Hudson starring as Fanny Brice in Funny Girl."

Finn is looking at her like she set the moon and stars in the sky herself. "Wow. Okay. Um, so, you want to get married before opening night?"

"Yes. I know we'll have to kind of rush a little. Do you mind?"

"Mind marrying you sooner?" He laughs. "Babe, I'd drag you to the courthouse this afternoon if you'd let me."

"Opening night won't be until at least next summer. Maybe fall? So we should get married right after the school year ends. Late June? Or July?"

"Just give me a date, babe."

"I'll talk to my director in a few weeks and have a better idea of when opening night might be. Then we'll plan the wedding for before that."

"And honeymoon. You're gonna be super busy performing and I'm gonna be starting teaching, hopefully, so we should make sure we get in our honeymoon and celebrate and relax before starting our careers."

"I agree."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Thanksgiving break is a combination of their usual Thanksgiving family traditions, followed by Finn and Rachel's engagement party that Saturday. Everyone came. Family, friends, even Mr. And Mrs. Schuester and Sue. It was fun and exciting. Rachel also celebrated getting Fanny with all of them. Mr. Schue asked for permission to tell his students about her; he wants to motivate them by pointing out that a student who sat where they're currently sitting has landed a lead role on Broadway by working her butt off.

The time between Thanksgiving break and Winter break is largely spent with Rachel meeting with professors to work out how to get in some classes and assessments between rehearsals. She also met with her director, producers, and fellow actors. With a planned opening date in September, Rachel tells Kurt and the others to help plan her wedding for mid July. July gives them time to plan and enough time to get married, have their honeymoon, and still have time before opening night. Kurt promises he's happy with largely taking over wedding planning. Rachel and Finn get final say on everything, but having Kurt help make the little choices and narrow things down for them is very helpful. She also talks to her director and producers. She makes it clear that she's getting married before opening night and wants her married name to be on the marquee and all advertisements. She had to swear that she'll actually get married and not back out and want to change her name back to her maiden name. She'd laughed and sworn that it's not even a remote possibility. It takes a little convincing, but they agree. All news about the show for now will say "Rachel Berry, soon to be Hudson", but that anything permanent like posters (which won't go up until the summer anyway) will have her name listed as "Rachel Hudson". In the meantime, she's fine with being referred to as Rachel Berry-Hudson. Satisfied, she left the meeting fighting the urge to skip as she went.

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Rachel's 21st birthday was a big celebration. She grinned, realizing this is a year of many big celebrations. This one is special because they didn't know if she'd live this long. She's legally an adult and old enough to drink. It was a Friday, so she and her friends celebrated the whole weekend. Her mom had wanted to come celebrate with her and it took a lot of fast talking to convince her mom to let her celebrate with just her friends her birthday weekend and have a family celebration her first weekend home of winter break. Reluctantly, her mom agreed. All of her friends were able to come. Blaine, Artie, and Tina couldn't drink since they're too young, but they still had a lot of fun. And they were the "designated drivers" meant to keep the others safe and out of jail. They started at Callbacks, where she got plenty of free drinks from the patrons and employees who know her, and they all sang a lot. Already tipsy, they headed to the next bar. And then the next. Eventually, quite drunk, they decided to walk Central Park until they sobered a little. They stopped at a diner and had greasy food and milkshakes in the hopes of preventing hangovers; or at least bad ones. On Saturday, they participated in a group scavenger hunt that was music themed and took them all through the city to different bars and other locations they'd never been before.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel Barbra Berry (soon to be Hudson) is over the moon. She's twenty-one years old. There was a time when they didn't think she'd ever live this long and here she is healthy. She feels good. Strong. She's in her senior year of NYADA and will get to graduate. She's marrying Finn. She landed the lead role of her favorite Broadway show. She decided to use her happiness to make others happy whenever she can. Despite her full schedule, she goes out of her way to help her framily and spend time with them. Her life is amazing and she wants their lives to be just as amazing.

The nightmare is truly behind her.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Her life becomes a chaotic web of rehearsals, classes, wedding planning, time with her friends, and very rare downtime for herself. She's busier than she's ever been in her life and hopes to never be this busy again. However, she's still enjoying it. She's getting her dreams. Of course, she wasn't expecting them to all happen at once. Winter break went too fast. The lull before the storm. She met with Sue to discuss progress on her project. She spent time with family and friends. Dylan and Ollie made her promise that she'll save tickets for them once her show opens (which made her hug them both tight since they're growing up and still want to hear her sing). She relaxed as much as she could knowing how busy she'll continue to be. Rachel is stressed and exhausted and overwhelmed but so happy she couldn't care less.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Sue Sylvester sits in her office with her head in her hands, breathing deeply. There's a knock at her door but she can only manage a grunt. Whoever is on the other side takes it as permission to enter. Thankfully it's William.

"Hey, Sue. Do you have—hey, are you okay?" Will Schuester takes a seat across from her.

Slowly, Sue lifts her head. "Not really."

"What's wrong."

"It's this project of Rachel's." She says, lifting up the papers in front of her for him to see.

Will frowns. "I thought it was going well! You said you and Shelby had a whole long list of people to contact."

Sue swallows hard before responding. "We do. We have a list of people who currently have or have had aplastic anemia. The truth—the painful truth— is that there are few people with the illness, fewer still who are still alive, and even fewer able or willing to travel. From the data we've collected, it looks like not many of the survivors live to old age. There's a trend. Look at this graph. The x-axis is number of years past date of remission. The y-axis is how many patients are still alive. Look at the drop. It's terrifying." And heart wrenching, but she'll leave that part unsaid.

"This can't be right." Will grabs the chart she's looking at and frowns. "Wait…that's…so there's less people alive the longer it's been after they went into remission? But that won't be Rachel." Will insists.

"Of course that won't be her." Sue snaps. "It won't be Rachel. She'll live longer. She'll live to old age. There's no way she doesn't get to live a nice long life. It's not a definite thing, Will. It's just a trend I noticed in the data."

Will looks at her sympathetically before offering her a hug. Sue hesitates briefly before accepting that a hug from a friend would be nice.

"Rachel is far too stubborn to let that happen. She'll be one of the ones who escapes that trend."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel peeks into every dance studio until she finally finds Cassandra. The woman is sitting on a piano bench taking off her heels. Rachel gets her attention by loudly stomping down with the cane she's holding. Cassandra looks up.

"What's that?"

"It's a gift. I got it at the Broadway Flea Market. It is Debbie Allen's original cane from Fame—the movie."

"Hmmm."

"I wanted to thank you for what you did."

"The number? That's NYADA tradition. We do that when one of the tribe gets a Broadway audition. Not that most, or any really, get leading roles from those auditions. You just have to stand out, don't you." The woman teases.

"Not the number. I wanted to thank you for everything that you've done for me since I started here. So…..thank you." She hands the cane over to Cassie.

"I've busted your ass since freshman year."

"You made me a better dancer. And that's why I came to NYADA, to learn and be challenged and to work with the best of the best. Not many professors were willing to challenge me freshman year, what with me being sick and all, but you pushed me anyway and I always appreciated that. Not the insults, but the rest." She grins.

"I saw something in you, the first day, and I thought to myself 'This one's special. This one might make it.' And that's why I'm so relentless."

Rachel raises a skeptical eyebrow. "You saw that in my first dance class here? Dancing isn't my strength, singing is. You hadn't heard me sing yet." When Cassie looks down and clears her throat, Rachel's eyes narrow. "Wait, you heard me sing before I came here? I mean, other than my audition song?"

"Well Carmen did make several of us professors watch a video of you singing to determine if we felt it was worth the hassle of bringing a sick student here."

"What video?" Cassie begins doing stretches. Rachel grabs her arm and spins her around. "Cassie, what video?"

The woman groans. "Ugh, from Hummel's vlog."

Rachel's jaw drops. "You—you know about the vlog."

A flush of red graces the woman's cheeks. "Fine. Yes. April Rhodes found his vlog after meeting the two of you and shared it with me."

"But that was years ago!" She gasps. "You watched videos of us singing years before we came here? So you also saw other videos….."

"Whatever. I may or may not have known your whole freaking story and been routing for you long before you were ever a student here and may have bullied my coworkers into allowing you to come before going into remission. But I th—"

Rachel cuts her off by hugging her tight. Cassandra hugs her back and whispers in her ear.

"I knew you'd make it. Not just health-wise, but Broadway. In those videos, I saw your strength, your bravery, your ambition, and your talent. I saw your star quality early on. And I knew you'd survive and make it to stardom. I wanted to help make that happen."

"You did." Rachel says with emotion.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Snick. Snick. Whoosh. Rachel smiles at the now lit candles. They'd been buried in the back of her closet for years. She hasn't taken them out or even looked at them in a long time. But now she feels like she could really use the peace they bring…assuming she can avoid thinking about why she owns these candles and the recording. She closes her eyes and just breathes in the scents, letting them bring her to a happy, calm place. She's grabbing the iPod with the recording when her bedroom door bursts open. She quickly shoves it behind her, out of sight.

"Do you have any super tampons I can have? I only have regular and that's not gonna cut it. Especially overnight." Santana groans as she flops on the bed.

"Um, yeah. In that bin over there." She indicates with a jerk of her head.

"Thanks."

The Latina grabs a couple tampons from the bin before booking it to the door. Rachel nearly breathes a sigh of relief but never gets the chance. At the door, Santana suddenly slows and turns back to her with a furrowed brow.

"Berry, are those the candles I think they are?" She doesn't come closer. She sniffs the air and takes in a long breath through her nose. "Why did you light these? Are you not getting enough attention from landing a lead role on Broadway on your first try? Do you need to remind us of when you were on your deathbed?"

Rachel ignores her jibes and gives a sigh, her shoulders slumping forward in slight embarrassment. "I just—with everything going on, and being so busy, I need a moment to unwind and I want—I want to be reminded of how I got here. None of this would be possible without you guys. Without your support."

Santana's smirk vanishes and her face softens. "Damn. Had to get all sweet and sappy on me. You can't just let a bitch be a bitch?" She sighs and slides into a sitting position beside Rachel. "Okay, that really is sweet. Do you have the recording?"

Sheepishly, Rachel holds up the iPod. "Right here."

"Good. Play it."

The two friends sit side by side, gently leaning into one another, eyes closed, breathing in the scents that remind them of the forest they spent much of their teen years in, and listening to the recording of their friends talking, laughing, and singing. Unbeknownst to each other, both girls start out fighting to focus on the positive memories and not think about the reason why this was made four years ago. Neither wants to think about how five years ago Rachel was literally on her deathbed and her friends got her these candles and made this recording specifically so she could feel like she was with them in their spot; to give her something happy and comforting to focus on as she passed away. It takes several minutes, but the tension fades from both of them and small smiles form on their faces. The comforting scents and the sounds of happy friends brings them peace. Rachel is first to feel a couple tears slip down her cheeks, dripping over her growing smile. They're how she got here. They were her comfort, her anchors, her cheerleaders. And they still are. Just for happier things now. She can do this. She can handle anything with them by her side. She opens her eyes and is only mildly surprised to see a single tear making it's way down Santana's cheek, even as she smiles contentedly. Rachel wipes it away. San's eyes blink open.

"We really do have an amazing group for friends, don't we?"

"We really do." Rachel agrees.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Shelby walks into Sue's office and shuts the door behind her. Sue knows what the problem is before the woman says a single word. She braces herself. Shelby tosses a paper onto her desk.

"They're dead. All of them. Every person on the list you gave me died. None of them survived, Sue."

"I was afraid of that. Many of those on my own list have passed away as well." She holds up a paper with red lines through many names. "But not all. People survive Aplastic Anemia, Shelby."

"For how long?!" Shelby demands. "The doctors mentioned having to redefine what 'healthy' means and possibly being weaker than she'd normally be after going into remission, but to see so few people actually survive—-" She cuts herself off to swallow back a wave of emotion.

Sue carefully folds her hands. "It looks like most died from AA directly. The rest…well, their bodies were left weakened and when another illness came around, like the flu, pneumonia, bronchitis….their bodies couldn't handle it. Weakened immune systems and all that."

Shelby slumps into a chair in front of Sue's desk. "Do we tell her?"

Sue cocks an eyebrow. "Do you really think she doesn't already know? Or at least suspect?"

"What do you—"

"Don't play dumb, Shelby. Yes, she wants to bring other people who have or had AA to the benefit. But I think…." She licks her lips "…I think she also wanted us to learn of this on our own. She wanted us to know but didn't want to be the one to say it."

"That she could die from a weakened immune system or weakened body? Despite being in remission?" Shelby snaps.

"It's a possibility. And one she clearly wants us to be aware of and accept."

"I will never accept—" Shelby starts hotly.

"Neither will I." Sue interrupts firmly. "And neither will Rachel. You know your daughter. She's strong and stubborn. She's finally getting her dreams. She won't let anything stop her from living them."

That seems to settle the mother down. She nods slowly. "Yeah. You're right. She already told me about all the immune support supplements she's been taking to avoid catching anything and how she and the others still rigorously clean their house to prevent the spread of germs."

"She's taking supplements, cleaning, avoiding people or places that could make her sick, she's eating well, she exercises regularly, and she gets plenty of sleep. She's taking steps to make sure her body remains strong and resilient. She'll be fine."

"I know she will be. But I've been contacting people or families of people who had or have AA only to realize all of them passed away…..it set off all of my deepest fears. I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize." Sue says softly. "I had my own meltdown when I first realized the same thing. But I have new lists and more people on them are still alive and kicking. Not many are interested in coming to the benefit, but most want to at least donate towards the cure. Rachel really wants this to work out. I was thinking that maybe—"

"No, Sue," Shelby interjects with a knowing smile, "I've already said you can't bribe any of them."

"Damn it."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kurt eyes Rachel's furrowed brow and knows what she's doing even if he can't see her computer screen. She's curled on the couch with her laptop and a stack of wedding magazines, but looks unhappy and frankly, stressed. He knows rehearsals are going well, so that's not the problem. Things at NYADA are hectic but good. Wedding plans are falling into place nicely, other than—that. With understanding, Kurt slips out of the room without her noticing.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Winter melts into Spring. By the time the world around them thaws, Rachel has gotten used to her hectic schedule. She and Finn have also finalized most details of their wedding and sent out invitations. They're not worried about it being somewhat short notice. Everyone they want to be there will be there. They've even planned out their honeymoon and made the reservations. Kurt did a fabulous job helping with wedding planning and seeing all the pieces come together makes Rachel tear up with happiness and excitement. All she's missing is her wedding dress. They're getting married in a beautiful barn. Rachel was appalled at first, but Kurt took the time to explain what it'd be like. No animals. Everything would be cleaned out so it wouldn't smell. Since the location is already rustic, the decorations are fancy. Chandeliers and beautiful lights will hang from the barn. Plus all the flowers and other little decorations that'll give it a Rachel-approved "fancy" look. A perfect blend of both Finn and Rachel's preferences. The reception will take place in the same barn, but can also overflow outside. And outside makes them both happy because there will be views of beautiful hills and a distant mountain. And since the reception will go into the night, there will be sparkling stars overhead. Just in case it's cloudy, they're planning on having plenty of lovely lanterns and fairy lights set up to light the festivities.

Rehearsals are going well. She doesn't attend classes often anymore, but is getting her work done and completing her mandatory assignments. She had a really fun photo shoot for advertisement purposes that she had Santana and Brittany join her at. She's getting along with her (some much older) costars. Even though she has it nearly memorized, she rereads the script every morning while eating breakfast, while on the bus, taxi, or train, and every night before going to bed.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"I can come help." Her mom insists.

"Thanks, Mom. I appreciate it and could really use your help. But at the same time, I don't have a lot of free time to go looking at the moment." She says in frustration.

"I know. But this is your wedding dress, honey. You're gettin married in just a few months. You need a dress. Give me the next day that you're free, even if it's just a few hours. I'll take off of work if it's a weekday."

Rachel opens her phone calendar and looks through her busy schedule. She swipes at her eyes, hating that she's this upset over not finding a wedding dress yet. They've been looking. For months. At first it was causal because she had plenty of time. But once she decided she wanted to get married before her opening night, time became limited and she started searching in earnest. The other girls, even Quinn, (and Kurt, of course) have been helping her search. It was fun for a while. But as time ticks away and she has nothing to show for it, it's becoming stressful. Finn tried to help by promising that she could wear pajamas and he wouldn't care. She'd thrown a pillow at him. Rachel finds a day where she's off and the next day she only has to work a couple hours. She tells her mom the dates and the woman promises she'll be there to help her look for a dress. That calms her. Reinforcements are coming.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Kurt nudges Rachel, making her scoot over to make room for him. "You mom is coming in two days, right? To help us find you a wedding dress?"

"And my Nana. She wanted to come, too."

"That's sweet. Do you have stores planned out?"

Rachel huffs. " A few, but the day I have the most time the store I want most is closed and the other day it closes before I'm done rehearsal! The other two stores were supposed to be the backups. I'm running out of time, Kurt. I need a dress."

"It'd be nice if you knew someone who knew someone who could pull a few strings." He says vaguely.

She gives him a weird look. "I guess, yeah."

"Then I guess it's a good thing you do."

She drops the wedding magazine she was reading and glares at him, too stressed to be amused. "What are you talking about, Kurt?"

"Rach, I work at . We're dedicated to fashion. We don't normally do anything wedding related, but I still work with fashion gurus. The best of the best. I may have talked to Isabelle and she may or may not have made a few calls on our behalf."

Eyes widening, Rachel sits up straighter. "Are you saying—"

He smiles cockily. "When your mom and grandma come in a few days, we'll have a fashionable and exclusive wedding store all to ourselves. Isabelle convinced them to open just for us. She said they fell over themselves to accommodate her in exchange for a positive review in ."

Rachel throws herself at her brother, hugging him tight. "You're the best brother ever."

"I know." He replies smugly.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They're treated like royalty. The store owner and his two assistants bring them chutes of champagne on silver trays and fawn over them. Rachel's mother, grandmother, brother, Santana, Brittany, and Quinn are all there to help out. They never go to the other two stores. They don't need to. They find the perfect dress for Rachel there. They even find bridesmaid dresses. Which is good, since she has a lot of bridesmaids who will need to get their dresses soon. Luckily Finn has a lot of groomsmen, so it all balances out.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel nervously clears her throat to get the man's attention. He looks up from the notes he was reviewing and smiles at her.

"Rachel! My youngest star. I'm surprised you're not heading home with the others. What can I do for you?"

"Um, I—I needed to ask a favor of you. I know I already told you that I'm getting married this summer and thank you again for helping me schedule the wedding and honeymoon so that I'm not missing much rehearsal here. I really appreciate it."

"And I already said you are welcome. So what's this new request?""

"More time off? Just a few days."

He raises an eyebrow. "Rachel…." He sighs. "I know you're young and new to this, but most actors, new just starting out actors, don't ask for this much time off. Especially on their first ever show."

It's a gentle reprimand, but it has her shaking nonetheless. She hates when people are disappointed in her. Heart thudding and mouth dry, Rachel nods her understanding. "I know. I really do. And I swear these are special circumstances."

"Like getting married." He agrees. "True. Alright, what's this other special circumstance?"

"Every June I participate in…..and help run….a benefit. It's always on a Saturday in June. I can catch a flight after rehearsal on that Thursday, but I'd need to be there for the benefit rehearsal on Friday and the benefit itself on Saturday, then I could come back on Sunday and be ready for rehearsal on Monday." They never rehearse on Sundays and even Saturday rehearsals aren't every week.

Mr. Campion frowns. "What kind of benefit?"

"It's to raise money for a cure for Aplastic Anemia." At his confused look, she elaborates. "It's a rare blood disease where the body doesn't make enough blood cells; red, white, or both. It's fatal and there's currently no cure, but there are treatments."

He crosses his right leg over his left and bounces it. He looks at her speculatively for a moment. "For you to be a part of and help run a benefit like this, you must have some close connection to it."

Here we go. "Yes. Me."

His foot stops bouncing. "Come again?"

"I had Aplastic Anemia. Actually, I had a more painful variant of the illness called Danton's Aplastic Anemia. I've been in remission for years, though."

"Re—You were sick but you're now in remission." He looks away then back to her. "You said it's fatal? And no cure? I guess the treatments worked, then?"

"For me. Yes. It took a long time, though. I was sick for years."

"How long?"

"I was first diagnosed early in my sophomore year of high school. So, almost four years."

He stares at her in shock. "Shit. I'm so sorry to hear that, Rachel. But you're good now?"

"Completely healthy." She promises. "I've been in remission for three years."

Mr. Campion looks at her apologetically. "I'm sorry, but you do realize I now have to inform the producers and possibly the investors, right?"

"What? Why? I'm healthy, I promise."

"This is a major undertaking, Rachel. And we were already taking a chance on you. To add in a history of health issues…..I don't know."

Her heart squeezes painfully in her chest and she has to actively fight down a wave of panic. She can't lose this. Especially not over something that's gone and a nonissue. "What—what do I need to do?"

"I really don't know. I need to talk it over with them. In the mean time, you came to ask about the benefit. Yes, I believe that'll be fine. What do you do for the benefit? Is it a marathon or walkathon or something?"

Despite her heart still screaming in fear, she smiles slightly. "No. We sing. My friends and I met in high school in glee club. We love singing and performing. So we perform for an audience and they donate money for a cure."

He smiles warmly. "Tell me more about this benefit and Aplastic Anemia."

She does. She tells him what the benefits are like and how much money they usually raise each year. She gives him the basics of what AA does do the body, about Danton's, but focuses on the symptoms. She keeps it short and to the point.

"Honestly, if you want to see it second hand, my brother made a vlog and had a whole section dedicated to talking about my illness. I'm in a lot of the videos, but not all. It was his way of venting, but it also drew a decent audience who kept asking about how I was doing so he gave regular updates. It turns out it even inspired someone." She tells him about Myron. Rachel has spoken to the kid twice since the benefit.

"Thank you for telling me all of this."

Rachel isn't sure she feels the same.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rupert Campion, director of Funny Girl, sits on his couch with his laptop on his lap and a glass of whiskey in his hand. Kurt Hummel created a separate playlist of videos dedicated to Rachel's health battle so it was easy for him to find them. He started at the beginning, figuring he'd watch one or two just to get an idea of what his young star went through. It's now 1am and his current video is from when Rachel was in stage four. Stage fucking four. And dying, according to the young Kurt. He's watching the video Kurt made in Rachel's hospital room shortly before she was expected to die. He's struggling to wrap his mind around the image of the frail girl on the screen compared to the healthy young woman he saw earlier this evening. He can't even imagine what it was like for her. For any of them. He coughs to clear his throat but can't help the wave of emotion that wells up in him when yet another mild attack hits the girl in the video. Seeing how much she suffered really moves him. He takes another swig of whiskey and clicks the next video. And the next and the next. He watches her come so close to death only to fight her way out of its grasp. He watches her fight to live. He watches her slowly get better. He watches how she keeps her head up through it all. He watches as she continues to live and enjoy her life as best she can, never letting go of her dreams. By the end of the videos he is exhausted and shaken.

He had no idea. He didn't realize how strong she truly is. And how incredible this Funny Girl experience actually is for her. She's living a dream she feared she'd never live to see happen. He's proud of her. He rubs his forehead, dreading the meeting he already called for tomorrow to discuss this with his producers.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel was a wreck all night. She spent the night with Finn so he could help distract and comfort her. She barely slept; just kept tossing and turning. In the morning, rehearsals go normal, though Mr. Campion keeps giving her odd looks. She hates the idea of being treated differently now that he knows. She also feels it isn't fair since she's healthy now. She has been healthy for years. At their lunch break, Mr. Campion calls her to him.

"We would like to speak with you, if that's okay. It won't take your whole lunch break, I promise."

"Sure."

She follows him to a room where the producers are already sitting waiting for them. He indicates that she sit at the table with them and then sits beside her.

"Ms. Berry, we wanted to start by saying how sorry we are to hear about what you went through. And how happy we are that you are now healthy." Sidney Greene, head producer, starts them off.

They all nod seriously. Rachel doesn't know how to react or what to say so she stays quiet and merely gives a small nod.

"However," Josh Green says reluctantly, "it does raise some concerns. You're in remission. What if you relapse?"

"Then I'll probably die." Rachel responds bluntly. "It'll be my third diagnosis if that happens. Every diagnosis lowers your odds of surviving. I may never relapse. I may relapse tomorrow. But I'm not going to stop living over a maybe."

"We understand that, but we have a lot riding on this."

Pulling on the strength Finn gave her last night, Rachel squares her shoulders and lifts her chin. "What do I need to do?"

The producers share a look. "We need a letter from your doctor confirming that you are in remission and show no signs of relapsing."

"I can do that. You'll have it within a week."

"Good. The next thing we need is not just for our benefit, but yours."

"And what's that?"

"Regular checkups."

Rachel smiles slightly. "I had monthly checkups for a year after going into remission. For the past two years I've been getting blood tests every three months. We'll do that for another couple months. After that, it'll be every six months. Then once a year. Trust me. I've already been in remission and relapsed within five months, was sick for over a year the second time, and now I'm in remission again. They're watching my blood levels far more closely this time around because I already relapsed once. I take vitamins and supplements, I eat well, I exercise regularly, I get enough sleep, I get regular checkups, and I keep note of any changes in my body and report them to my doctor. Not that I've had anything to report in the past three years. I know this is new to you, but it's not new to me. I've been living with this for six years. I'm a pro at it."

They share another look and smile in relief. "Okay. That's very comforting. You're clearly well prepared and have everything well in hand. We're glad to hear that."

Rachel nods, some of her tension fading. "Anything else?"

"Just one." Michael Grebhard says with a smile. "Tell us more about this benefit. We want to make sure they get a cure for you as soon as possible."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mr. Campion leads her out of the room after the meeting ends. She'd love to book it out and go grab lunch now that her stomach is no longer flipping. However, his body language is giving away his wish to talk to her but also his hesitance. So she walks at his pace and waits patiently. When they get to the theater, he finally turns to her.

"Rachel. I—I'm going to ask you something and it's more than okay if you say no. I won't be mad or offended or upset in any way. I'd completely understand."

"What is it?"

"Last night, I watched the videos. All of them. I know it's a little odd because we don't know each other very well, but would if it'd be okay if—" Rachel steps into him with a smile and hugs him warmly. He chuckles and hugs her back. "How'd you know that's what I was gonna ask?"

"Everyone who watches those videos needs a hug afterwards. I get it. Hell, the rare times I rewatch any of them, I need a hug after."

She steps back and he's smiling warmly at her. "I know we've only known each other a few months, but I feel the need to say…..I'm proud of you. And impressed. I will never doubt your strength or your resolve."

"Thank you."

"So how'd you convince your mother to let you leave Ohio to go to college in New York, while still sick, without her?"

Rachel laughs heartily and dives into a dramatic retelling of that battle.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel, Finn, Brittany, Quinn, Mercedes, and Mike all graduate within a two week span. The group talks in depth to work out who can go to whose graduation so that everyone has at least a couple people from their group going to support them and celebrate with them. They also talked and decided they'll do family celebrations right after graduating, but they'll have a large group graduation party in early summer, right near the benefit. Kurt is annoyed he's not graduating. He's still a semester away since he started a semester late. He'll graduate in December, which bugs him. Then the following June they'll celebrate Blaine, Tina, and Artie graduating. Santana isn't completely sure when she'll graduate. She's been balancing college and working at the Broadway diner, but is contemplating picking up additional classes so she can graduate sooner.

All of Rachel's parents are coming for her graduation, then staying for Finn's graduation two days later. They arrive the day before Rachel's graduation and settle into their hotel before going to the house to greet the kids and join them for dinner. Her director gave her the day off from rehearsals so she could graduate and celebrate, but expects her back the next day. She did manage to wheedle out some time so she could go to Finn's graduation, but she has to go to work before and after. She's fine with that. Rachel is proud of them. Finn is graduating cum laude and Rachel herself is graduating summa cum laude. When Rachel walks across the stage to accept her diploma, her friends and family cheer wildly. She flushes but grins and keeps her head up with pride. The fact that her classmates are cheering for her nearly as much touches her deeply. She walks past Cassie and catches her grin and wink. Carmen Tibideaux has an especially proud smile when Rachel shakes her hand.

"I knew you'd be spectacular." The woman whispers.

"Thank you. For everything." Rachel responds just as quietly.

As soon as she steps away from Carmen, but before the next name is called, Rachel turns to where her family is sitting. She holds up the rolled paper in her hand and grins in an "I told you I'd do it" kind of way. Not that they ever doubted her. Just her health. Their cheers get louder. She can clearly hear Finn's call of "That's my girl!" over the others. Not hearing another name being called, Rachel glances back at the stage in confusion. All of her professors are smiling at her. Carmen Tibideaux leans into the microphone.

"For those who don't know, Rachel Berry will be performing on Broadway in late summer. She will be playing the role of Fanny Brice in Funny Girl. Though, by then, I've been informed that her name will be Rachel Hudson. NYADA is very proud to have a student receive a leading role before even graduating and we wish her the best. We know she will continue to astound her audiences."

This is followed by applause and cheers from everyone. Rachel smiles and gives a slight bow, not really sure how to react. She returns to her seat as the next name is called. After, she victoriously tosses her cap into the air with the others and laughs. It's weird not graduating with Kurt and she doesn't like it, but she ignores the feeling and focuses on being proud that she has graduated college. She can officially focus on her career (and wedding, of course). She gets so many hugs and is stopped by so many classmates that it takes longer than expected to leave campus. Her family is understanding, finding the whole thing amusing. When they finally escape, her mom wraps an arm around her shoulders.

"Think of it as practice for once you're famous."

"Well, she's already famous on campus." Blaine says with a smirk. He loves teasing her about that.

Rachel shakes her head in amusement. It's a little embarrassing to admit that he's right. She's always had attention on campus for various reasons. Having a service dog with her, fainting or getting attacks on campus, nearly dying in dance class, and her incredible talent. By her senior year, most had forgotten about her illness and just knew her because of her talent. She won every Winter Showcase, she won every Midnight Madness she was challenged to, and, of course, she won a leading role on Broadway while still a student. Most of her classmates (especially the younger students), admired her and watched her with wide eyes wherever she went. After getting the role of Fanny, some of her more over the top classmates started treating her like a celebrity. It both amused her and made her a little embarrassed. It even earned her grudging respect from those who were nasty to her in the past. They have a celebratory dinner at a nice restaurant, with several tables reserved before heading home (or to their hotel).

At rehearsals the next day, she is surprised by her costars and producers throwing her a small party at lunch to congratulate her on graduating NYADA. She has gotten to know Paolo, Poppy, Monica, Joe, and Brittany. Paolo, her costar playing the role of Nick Arnstein, is quite a bit older than her and had some reservations about playing opposite someone so young and inexperienced. It took him a while to really warm up to her, but after she performed well at rehearsals again and again, and accepted direction and criticism well, he finally decided she's worthy. Rachel accepted that with a smile and the quiet hope that he loosens up more and stops seeing her as a child. She's 21. They had a nice lunch to celebrate her graduation before getting back to rehearsal. She appreciated their kindness and thanked them all. The next day she quickly changes into a nice dress before hurrying out to make it to Finn's graduation ceremony. Her coworkers teased her about "cleaning up nice" and how Finn is "one lucky man". She'd chuckled and waved as she hurried out. She'd been amused to find that Mr. Greene was serious about making sure she gets there and back quickly, so he hired a car service to drive her there and back. Finn is fine with it. He's glad she'll be able to be there to watch him graduate. They're delaying a celebratory dinner until after her rehearsal is over and she can join them.

The only other graduation she was able to attend was Quinn's, and that's only because rehearsals were cut short that day so that the producers and director could go to a meeting with investors. She felt bad not being able to go to Brittany's, Mike's, or Mercedes' (on the other side of the continent) graduations, but the group split up and made sure at least a couple of them were able to go to theirs. Everyone had at least a couple friends attend their graduation. Someone recorded every graduation so that those who couldn't attend could at least watch a video of their friends walking across the stage to accept their diploma's. They then made a compilation video of all of them graduating. They're going to wait until next year, after everyone else's graduations, then share the video with everyone including Mr. Schue and Coach Sue.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Myron could not return for the benefit this year. He's still alive, but not currently doing well enough to travel. Rachel made sure to at least call and talk to him. She told him about Funny Girl and promised him tickets to her show, which made him very happy. Friday, she goes to rehearsal early. She walks through McKinley's halls before the others arrive, remembering her years here. She even chuckles when she gets to the spot where she fell apart sobbing when Finn broke up with her. Now she's marrying him in just a few weeks. Weeks. She's so excited she can barely contain it. Add in that her show opens on Broadway in less than two months and she's a bubbly mess of excitement. It makes her very happy that she spent years taking it one day at a time as she fought to live and now she's taking it one day at a time to remain calm from being too excited. She shakes these thoughts away as she comes upon the choir room. Rachel leans into the open doorway and watches Mr. Schue talk to his students. Sue is sitting onto the far side, near the piano, looking bored.

"Which is why it is so important that when you sing, you sing with—"

"Passion." Rachel finishes for Mr. Schue, walking up beside him with a smile. Her old teacher spins around and starts laughing. She leans into his side as he hugs her, but addresses the kids sitting before her. Did she look that young when she sat here? She's not that much older than them, and yet…."If you're not passionate when you sing, you just won't have any sort of impact on your audience. They need to feel it, not just hear it."

"She's absolutely right."

A kid raises her hand. "Uh—who is she?"

Rachel realizes she doesn't recognize the girl. She must be a freshman or a sophomore who didn't sing at the benefit last year. Another kid hits her arm. "How unobservant are you? She's in the pictures on the wall."

"Wait, pictures? What pictures?" Rachel asks, grinning. The kids point. Rachel heads over to the wall to find a whole section of the choir room wall is filled with pictures of the original New Directions, including the ill fated Christmas picture where they tied up Mr. Schue and Coach Sue. She laughs. "God, we look so young."

"You were. You are." Sue says, coming up behind her. Then she whispers in Rachel's ear. "There are more pictures in his office. Look at those later, though."

Rachel nods and hugs her. She grins at the gasps she hears from the kids when their co-coach hugs her back. Sue doesn't hug. So to see this strange woman hug her is shocking. As she passes the piano, Brad takes her hand and smiles warmly in greeting. He's not a man of many words.

"Guys, this is Rachel Berry." Rachel clears her throat and gives him a pointed look. "Oh, sorry. Rachel Berry, soon to be Rachel Hudson. She's the one I told you about that's going to be on Broadway. Her show opens in September."

"August." Rachel corrects. "Things are going well, we're ahead of schedule, and the theater will be available, so we're opening in mid-August."

The same snotty kid scoffs. "I guess it's not hard to get on Broadway, then."

All four adults look at her in disbelief. Mr. Schue turns to Rachel. "Care to prove her wrong?"

"I want to hear her sing, first." Rachel insists.

The arrogant girl flips her blonde hair in a way that reminds Rachel of Quinn when she was a self-absorbed teenager, back freshman year of high school. The girl stands before them and sings "Blow Me (One Last Kiss)". She's decent. Not fabulous. Not even great. Just good. Rachel would almost say "average" but stays quiet. She's spent the past four years at NYADA singing with the best of the best. And she has spent the past few months singing with professionals. It may have skewed her views of talent in kids or at least the general public. She'll have to work on that. She applauds politely while the rest of the team cheers wildly for their teammate. She looks to Sue, who looks miffed, and Mr. Schue, who almost looks embarrassed, and understands. They had enough members to make a team this year, but not enough talent to win. That sucks. She stands and takes her place.

"Show 'em how it's done." Sue says. They all ignore the scoff from the arrogant girl. Rachel just nods.

Just to shut up any potential naysayers and put this arrogant freshman in her place, Rachel sings "To Love You More". The kids are slack-jawed, Mr. Schue looks proud, and Sue looks….vindicated.

Rachel turns to the arrogant freshman who challenged her. "I sat where you are. And I worked hard to improve my singing. I graduated from the New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts. They only accept the best of the best. They hold a Winter Showcase every year and it is a huge honor just to be invited. I won three years in a row, including my freshman year. I didn't get invited my senior year because by then, I'd already landed a lead role on a Broadway show and was starting rehearsals. I didn't have the time for it." She looks the girl over. "You made four mistakes. Your first mistake was challenging someone you never heard sing before. Your second mistake was choosing a song you clearly haven't rehearsed. You obviously know it, but haven't rehearsed it. I could tell. You were off key twice and couldn't hit some of the high notes and didn't change anything about the song to better fit your range. Your third mistake was not singing with passion. You sang with arrogance, but not passion. I was bored." Sue starts laughing. "Pick a song that means something to you and sing from the heart. You can be confident. You can't be arrogant. Confidence comes from knowing you worked hard and got it right. Arrogance comes from assuming you're better than everyone else."

"And my fourth mistake?" The girl asks with attitude.

"Challenging me." The other adults howl with laughter. At least Mr. Schue turned his back and is trying to hide it. Sue and Brad don't care enough to hide how amused they are. "I am very talented, which you didn't seem to realize despite knowing I landed a role on Broadway. I don't back down, I don't give up, and I always give my all. I chose a song I've rehearsed many times and knew I could sing perfectly. You half-assed that performance and you know it." The girl looks down in defeat. She smirks at the adults. "Can I hang in your office until the others arrive?"

"Of course."

In his office, she sees what Sue means. He has an entire wall next to his desk dedicated to pictures of the original New Directions. She smiles. Clearly, they're still his favorites. There aren't just group pictures here. There are pictures of the kids by themselves, pairs, small groups, and whole groups. Pictures of them performing, hanging out, at prom and junior prom, graduation, and even some pictures of them after graduating. Like the picture of her and Finn at their engagement party last fall. Dead center is a picture of her, alone, from sophomore year. Rachel would guess she was stage two at that point. Something prompts her to lift the picture and look at the back, wanting to check if there's a date to confirm her suspicions. There's no date. Instead, there are two word: the lynchpin. She frowns, not understanding it. Shrugging, she sits in his seat behind his desk and plays on her phone for a while. After about half an hour, Mr. Schue comes in.

"Sorry for interrupting your rehearsal, Mr. Schue."

"Never apologize for that. And I've told you to call me Will. You're an adult now."

"It's just so weird. You're Mr. Schue. Anyway, I won't apologize for interrupting, but I will apologize for how harsh I was with that girl."

"Samantha. And don't apologize. You did what Sue's been pushing me to do all year. I've just been too chicken. I hate upsetting kids and crushing their dreams. I've tried to inspire them and encourage them, but she just remains stubbornly arrogant that she doesn't need as much practice. You told her exactly what she needed to hear. And frankly, I think it was best coming from you. Someone older but not old, someone who has made their dream come true with their talent and hard work."

They sit in companionable silence for a moment before Rachel gestures to the pictures. "Nice pictures. I see we're still your favorites." She teases.

He laughs. "You guys will always be my favorites."

"Can I ask about this?" She points to the picture of her at the center. "The back says 'the lynchpin'. What does that mean?"

He smiles softly, but at the same time, a little sadly. "Less than a week after you were diagnosed your sophomore year, I was in this office watching you in the choir room. You, Santana, and Puck were talking about how you were struggling to accept your diagnosis and how to help you deal with it. It was a tough conversation to listen to. Then the others came in and you all ate lunch in here. The conversation became light and friendly, with you guys laughing and joking around. I watched and thought about how different the atmosphere in the room was then compared to the previous Friday when you'd told them about your diagnosis. I watched you interact with all of them and thought about how you were the lynchpin, the person holding all of us together. You, and Kurt, but mostly you, pushed for this club to begin. You drew in other members. You encouraged them to do better. You were friends with all of them. Yeah, all of them were friends, some closer than others. But when it came down to it, you were the one holding that whole group together. Without you, there'd have been no Glee club. Without you, that particular group wouldn't have all been friends. You brought them all together and kept them together. It started before you got sick; before they even found out about your home life. But after your diagnosis, your relationships grew stronger. Not just with you, but with each other. Without you, none of that would have happened. None of them would have been that close. So, you were the lynchpin. And I don't think it'd be a stretch to say you're still their lynchpin."

Rachel gives him a wobbly smile. "I remember thinking once that life threatening illnesses either draw people together or push people away. I got lucky to be surrounded by people who drew in tighter to face it together instead of fleeing in terror."

"I think that's pretty accurate. But again, while you being sick is a big reason why you all became so close, it started before you got sick. You drew them in; not the illness."

"I've really missed you, Mr. Schue. Will." Then she grins and jokes. "When I win my Tony, if I forget to thank you in my acceptance speech, accept my thank you now. Thank you for being an amazing and supportive coach. You helped me get here."

He laughs and hugs her. "You're very welcome. But I'm pretty sure you would have made it even without me."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

They apologized to Mr. Schue for not being able to do another musical re-do, but they were just too busy this year. He understood. Rachel and her mom sang "Try Everything" by Sia to open the benefit. Not long into the benefit, she goes back out on stage alone. For a moment, she stands at the microphone and just stares out at the audience and the cameras recording it for their live audience.

"We started this benefit six years ago. The idea came after my friends and I researched how close they were to a cure. At the time, they said the cure could be available anywhere from 10 to 30 years. It's been six and they've now narrowed it down to 10 to 20 years. One of my friends suggested that we hold a benefit to raise money to send to the foundation to help hurry the cure along. And that's what we did. I'd like to think that our donations are what shortened the wait for the cure by 10 years. And I'd like to think we can shorten it even more with more money. Things in my life have literally never been better. I've never been this happy. Things have never been this good. I want that to continue. I don't like the threat of relapsing and getting sick again hanging over me. I want the cure so that that never happens. I already faced it twice, I really don't want to face it a third time."

She takes a moment to gather herself and let her words sink in before continuing.

"But the cure isn't just for me. It's for everyone currently sick, everyone like me who is in remission and just praying they don't relapse, and for anyone who gets sick in the future. It's for all of us."

Behind her, the curtain goes up. About twenty people of all ages and skin color sit in chairs on bleachers so they can all be seen. Rachel looks back at them, smiles, then faces the audience again.

"It's for us. Those currently fighting and those who already fought and survived. Everyone currently on this stage falls into one of those two categories. We all have or had Aplastic Anemia. From eight year old Makayla to 78 year old Marsha. All of us intend to fight and live. So for those of you who are donating, we thank you."

Everyone behind her repeats it in a strong voice. "Thank you."

Hearing little Makayla's voice nearly breaks Rachel's heart. When she met these people this morning, she was devastated to see the young girl amongst them, holding her mom's hand and staring at everyone with wide eyed. Thankfully, the girl has the more common AA and not Danton's. Makayla's mother had been horrified to learn of Danton's and relieved her daughter doesn't have it. AA is bad enough alone.

"You'd think this is a lot of people here. This isn't. There are 23. We started with a list of over 300. As we started contacting people, we discovered that most had passed away. Of those surviving, many were too sick to travel. A lot just didn't want to come but did offer to donate. These were the only ones we were able to contact who were still alive, well enough to travel, and willing to participate. Some came because they didn't know about any benefits for AA and are excited at the possibility of a cure. Some came for a sense of community. Aplastic Anemia is a rare disease. There aren't really support groups for it, because there just aren't enough people in one area to form one. These wonderful people behind me are from all across America. Meaning community support is minimal. Finding someone else with the same illness to talk to or commiserate with is very challenging. Now, we can build an online community of support for people with Aplastic Anemia. The Danton's variant I had is even more rare. Of this group, only Bruce also had it."

A man in his forties raises a hand and nods to Rachel.

"Having support is more important than you realize. Aplastic Anemia is very difficult to live with. It is draining. You have very little energy. For those of us with Danton's, it's very painful and scary. It makes living a normal life nearly impossible. Knowing there's no cure and we may die is stressful. Knowing we could faint or get an attack at any time is stressful. Knowing we could bleed out from a small cut is stressful. The fact is, living with any form of AA at any stage is stressful and difficult. Without support, it's that much harder. I was very lucky. I was surrounded by family and a large group of wonderful friends from the very beginning. I had a huge, dedicated support group keeping me going. I needed that. I would not have survived without them. I know this, because I nearly gave up."

She takes a breath and glances at the people behind her. She already talked to Makayla's mom to make sure she was okay with her saying all this blunt, hard stuff where her daughter could hear and possibly get upset. The mom said that she and her husband have been talking to their daughter very honestly and have been very upfront about her illness from the beginning. They phrase things gently, but they don't lie to her or hide anything.

"Maybe I'm wrong, but I think that facing any life threatening disease alone is nearly impossible. You need support. We need support. We need to vent, we need to laugh, we need to cry and yell, we need to be held and hugged, and we need to be yelled at right back."

There are some subdued chuckles at that.

"I remember the moment I nearly gave up. I was stage four. I was sixteen. I was in the hospital, literally on my deathbed. They had already said I probably wouldn't make it through the night. I was in so much pain and so tired and so stressed and so weak…..to know an end was in sight was…..a relief. A scary sort of relief, but relief. I wanted to let go. I didn't want to be in pain anymore. I didn't want to be scared anymore. I closed my eyes and I could feel myself slipping away. I remember how it felt. It's not as clear now, since it was five years ago, but I do remember. I remember feeling myself fading. I remember reaching a point where I knew that if I let go, that'd be it. It'd all be over. I wanted to. I was about to. But I could still hear my mom humming a soothing melody to me." Rachel closes her eyes and hums the same melody from memory. As she goes on, tears slip down her cheeks. She keeps humming until the end of the tune. In the front row, her mother's face is soaked with tears and she's gripping Scott's hands for dear life. "I could feel my boyfriend holding my hand, like he was trying to anchor me. I knew my brother was there. I knew I was being held. I knew fighting would mean more pain, more fear, more uncertainty, and more stress. But I'd get to stay with them. Them, who had been by my side, supporting me, loving me, every step of the way. They fought by my side. The least I could do was continue to fight for them. So I did. I fought. And I lived. For them."

She ignores her soft tears and looks behind her at the other survivors and fighters.

"I'm not alone. I hate that I'm not alone in this, but I'm not alone. I spoke to all of these wonderful people at one point or another, even if it was just this morning. All of them said the same thing; they would have given up if they didn't have at least one person at their side loving them, supporting them, and asking them to keep fighting. They kept fighting for the people they love. We all did. Some still are. We don't give up, not just for ourselves, but for the people who love us. And we'll never stop."

She uses the opportunity of the applauding to dry her face. "We're going to sing now. Well, I'm going to sing and they're going to join in if they feel like it. Some said they will, some said they won't. That's fine. I'm just happy to have them joining me on stage."

Rachel takes a moment to center herself, then nods to Will. He nods back and cues the music.

"You're broken down and tired
Of living life on a merry-go-round
And you can't find the fighter
But I see it in you so
We gonna walk it out

And move mountains
We gonna walk it out
And move mountains

And I'll rise up
I'll rise like the day
I'll rise up
I'll rise unafraid
I'll rise up
And I'll do it
A thousand times again

And I'll rise up
High like the waves
I'll rise up
In spite of the ache
I'll rise up
And I'll do it
A thousand times again

For you
For you
For you
For you

When the silence isn't quiet
And it feels like it's
Getting hard to breathe
And I know you feel like dying
But I promise we'll
Take the world to its feet

And move mountains
Bring it to its feet
And move mountains"

No one behind her has been joining in. She glances behind her and they're staring at her with wide eyes and smiles. Oh. So they didn't realize she could really sing. Grinning, she waves for them to join in. Most do.

"And I'll rise up
I'll rise like the day
I'll rise up
I'll rise unafraid
I'll rise up
And I'll do it
A thousand times again

For you
For you
For you
For you

All we need,
All we need is
Hope
And for that we have
Each other
And for that we have
Each other

And we will rise
We will rise
We'll rise,
Ohh oohhh
We'll rise

I'll rise up
Rise like the day
I'll rise up
In spite of the ache
I'll rise up
I will rise
A thousand times again"

She waves to them to indicate they should sing louder with her.

"And we'll rise up
High like the waves
We'll rise up
In spite of the ache
We'll rise up
And we'll do it
A thousand times again

For you
For you
For you
For you"

They get a standing ovation and loud cheering. She smiles and indicates that they should bow. When they hesitate, she playfully glares at them.

"You earned this. If not for the song, then for your fight. For your strength."

They soften and finally accept their accolades with a bow. Some shyly, some playfully, some seriously. When the applause dies down and the audience retakes their seats, Rachel speaks again.

"Just remember, we fight for you; for our loved ones. Now, it's been a few years, but I do remember what it's like to have AA. So, while we do have another song to sing, we're going to take a break. Those who have AA probably need it." She waves for them to start filing off the stage and smiles at them helping one another as needed. To distract the audience from this slow procession, she keeps talking. "I remember early in my junior year of high school, I performed at our show choir's sectionals competition. I shouldn't have, I was stage three. Actually, I may have been stage four at the time, we're not certain. I found out less than two weeks after that that I was stage four. Anyway, I was asked not to perform because I needed to rest. But I begged and cried until they gave in and let me. I sat on a stool, sang one song, had to be half-carried off stage, and fell asleep before my boyfriend could even carry me back to the green room down the hall. So, naps may be in order for some of them. We actually set up a quiet room with cots just for any of them who could use a nap. I napped a lot while I was sick. One of my coaches actually bought a comfortable reclining chair for her office for me to nap on during the school day, even if she claimed the chair was for herself. She only bought it after I got sick and I never once saw her sit in it. It was my chair and I knew it."

Immediately after leaving the stage herself, she went straight to her mother for the embrace they both desperately needed. She knew it'd hurt her mom to be reminded of it, but she'd needed to hum the song to accurately paint the picture of the moment for the audience. She needs them to donate more money so they can make a damn cure already. If that means she bares her soul on stage to strangers and cries and makes others cry, then so be it.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel is called onto stage and handed a slip from a smiling Will. She reads the paper and both laughs and groans.

"It looks like a group of people pitched in to donate a lot of money to request that I sing a specific song. It just so happens that this group of people is my director, all my producers, and my cast mates." She'd already told the audience about her Funny Girl debut and tied it into how lucky she is to have survived and be living her dreams. She also said she was under very strict orders from her director and producers to not sing a single Funny Girl song. Like, she'd risk being sued or dropped from the show. She looks to the closest camera. "From the bottom of my heart, thank you for the donation. I honestly didn't know you all would be watching this live, but I suppose I should have realized it was a good possibility. And also….how dare you." She playfully wags a finger. "This is a challenging song that I haven't practiced or even sung in a long time. Luckily, I know it pretty well. But first, Finn! This is in no way representative of how I feel….weeks before our wedding."

Finn doesn't know the song well enough, but Blaine does, so he sings the man's part. Mercedes offers to sing the soprano parts. The music starts and she puts on a mildly panicked expression while singing the very fast song "Getting Married Today". She's very proud of herself for not tripping over the quickly sung words. She also took it as a performance challenge, considering it's coming from her Broadway bosses and costars, so she really went all out.

"But please, on my knees,
there's a human life at stake"

Rachel slowly sinks to her knees, pleadingly. As she sings the next lines, she continues to very slowly slide further down until she's flat on her stomach on the stage by the end of the verse.

"Listen everybody,
I'm afraid you didn't hear or
Do you wanna see a crazy lady
Fall apart in front of you
It's isn't only Paul who may be ruining his life
You know the both of us could be losing our identities
I telephoned my analyst about it and he said he'd see me Monday
But by Monday I'll be floating in the Hudson with the other garbage"

She pops her head up and instead of singing the next line, says it in a clear, loud, deadpanned voice.

"I'm not well"

The audience, who had already been chuckling through her performance, laughs harder. She quickly gets to her feet while singing the rest. When Mercedes starts singing her next part, Rachel crawls under the piano, pretending to try to escape, and screams a rather hysterical "OH, SHUT UP" from the back of the stage, out of sight. The audience is in tears from laughing so hard. In all, while it was an unexpected challenge, it was very fun to sing and fun for the audience to watch. She's glad they requested it. And more glad to know they're watching and supporting her.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The cast and crew of Funny Girl sits in the audience seats watching the live benefit being projected on the stage curtain. They hooted and laughed through Rachel's performance. The director agreed to shorten rehearsals today and give multiple breaks so they could watch the benefit if they wanted. They were all impressed with the talent of Rachel's friends, and of course Rachel herself. The fact that she could pull off "Getting Married Today" with no warning or prep and put on a funny performance with no slip ups is a sign of a true star in their minds. This also showed that she can improv well, which is good to know. And damn can her mother sing! They intend to ask Rachel about her mother when she returns.

They watched the beginning together and many cried or at least teared up while she gave her speech with the other AA survivors on stage with her. They'd had no idea. She'd been vague when telling them about her illness and the reason for the benefit. Now they understand a little better. Now they understand their young star's passion and zest for life a little better.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Finn walks out on stage holding Rachel's hand. Will has already set up two stools for them and Finn leads Rachel to one of them before grabbing the microphone and addressing the audience.

"This next song I'm gonna sing is damn near perfect for Rachel. She's not singing it with me, but I want her on stage with me while I sing it. For the record, she has no idea what I'm going to sing and has never heard me sing this before. So you all know about her health issues, obviously. It's why we have this benefit. But if you just looked at her, would you think 'oh, that girl's been through the ringer'? No. You'd just see a healthy, beautiful, confident woman. Yeah, that's because she is all those things. But more than that, it's what she shows. Outside this benefit, she really doesn't talk much about her time sick and she tires to avoid discussing it with people who don't already know unless she can't avoid it. So most people who meet her would never suspect what she's been through. And even most of you watching have no idea that there are other things she has suffered through besides her health. Things you'd never know she went through because she keeps her head up and smile on. So when I first heard this song, I immediately thought of Rachel."

He takes his seat and waits for the music to begin.

"Walking in the room
Turnin' every eye
Perfect make up on
Got her hair just right

You would never know
She covers it so well
But the caution in her glance
Might be the only way to tell

She don't look like what she's been through
You would think that she's alright
But she has a way of hiding
All the hell she's had to fight
Where her smile outshines the darkness
You'd believe your lying eyes
She don't look like what she's been through
But she's been through the fire
She's been through the fire

Freckles on her skin
Lines on her face
Silver in her hair
But every hair in place

If she let you in
You may see her scars
But she'd never let you know
Just how deep they are

She don't look like what she's been through
You would think that she's alright
But she has a way of hiding
All the hell she's had to fight
Where her smile outshines the darkness
You'd believe your lying eyes
She don't look like what she's been through
But she's been through the fire
She's been through the fire

Burned down to the ground
But came out like a diamond
Shining in a crown

She don't look like what she's been through
You would think that she's alright
But she has a way of hiding
All the hell she's had to fight
Where her smile outshines the darkness
You'd believe your lying eyes
She don't look like what she's been through
But she's been through the fire
She's been through the fire

She's been through the fire
She don't look like
What she's been through
If you only knew
What she's been through"

During his standing ovation, he ignores the audience to hug his crying fiancé.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Rachel and Santana playfully argue over whether "Every Breath You Take" is a romantic song or a creepy stalker song. They sing it together and have the audience vote; creepy or romantic. Rachel is hyper and laughing a lot, bouncing around on stage. Santana shakes her head.

"What am I gonna do with you? You're far too hyper."

She bounces off stage calling over her shoulder. "I'm just so happy!"

Kurt, who had been walking on stage for his next song, laughs at her and asks sarcastically "Gee I wonder why?"

Santana sighs. "How do we gonna calm her down?"

"We don't. Let her be happy."

"That's not just happy, that's super hyper!"

"Let's see," Kurt dramatically taps his chin with his finger. "What could Rachel be so happy about? Well, she's been in remission for three years and has never felt better. She just graduated from the New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts at the top of her class. She's getting married in a few weeks to her high school sweetheart and love of her life. And oh yeah, her Broadway debut, where she's the freaking leading lady, is in less than two months. What could she possibly be so happy about?"

The audience is chuckling. Santana rolls her eyes but smiles and leaves the stage so Kurt can sing his song. As much as she complains about Rachel's hyper-ness, it makes Santana truly happy to see her friend so happy. She deserves it.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

After more performances from various groups and solos (including Rachel and Finn singing "I Just Can't Stop Loving You" in a very sweet performance), those who have or had AA rejoin Rachel on the stage. Since they all had a chance to rest, they stand for this song.

"There are plenty of tear jerker songs we could have sung, but we decided we wanted something more powerful. We had to do this song. It's a must. We wanted our last song together to be strong." Rachel informs the audience. "Instead of imaging this song being sung to an ex-lover, we're imaging singing it to Aplastic Anemia. We're going to sing 'Survivor' by Destiny's Child, but we shortened it a little and I changed the lyrics to everything but the chorus. I left the chorus alone. And the first two lines are perfect, so I left them alone, too."

The group behind her sings ooohs while she sings, then joins in on the chorus.

"Now I got you out of my life
It's so much better
Thought the meds wouldn't work
But they did work
Thought I'd have to go it alone
But I didn't
I was surrounded by
People who love me
You thought you could take me out
But you couldn't
You thought you would wear me down
But you didn't
I had friends around
To keep me going
You think you'll come back again
But I'll fight you

I'm a survivor,
I'm not gonna give up
I'm not gonna stop
I'm gonna work harder
I'm a survivor,
I'm gonna make it
I will survive
Keep on surviving
I'm a survivor,
I'm not gonna give up
I'm not gonna stop
I'm gonna work harder
I'm a survivor
I'm gonna make it
I will survive
Keep on surviving

While you did your best
You didn't know I was blessed
I still have success and lots of happiness
I'm not gonna let you take me down
You're not gonna put me in the ground
I'm not gonna let you take all the joy in life
I'm not gonna let you take the best of me
I'm gonna fight this and finally be free
'Cause my momma taught me to be stronger than you

I'm a survivor,
I'm not gonna give up
I'm not gonna stop
I'm gonna work harder
I'm a survivor,
I'm gonna make it
I will survive
Keep on surviving
I'm a survivor,
I'm not gonna give up
I'm not gonna stop
I'm gonna work harder
I'm a survivor
I'm gonna make it
I will survive
Keep on surviving"

In the final chorus, those on stage with her, her fellow survivors, all sang with strength. It was not only wonderful to hear, and made some tears well up in her eyes, but it also gave her the chance to let them carry the chorus while she sang a little more artistically, belting and holding certain words, adding in runs, and basically just singing her heart out. Between that and the strong singing of the others, it still managed to be an emotional and inspiring performance. The audience was on their feet before the song even ended.

"I'm a survivor"

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A/N: First, sorry for being wrong. I added a lot more detail than I originally intended, so this is NOT the last chapter. The next chapter is, I swear. And it's done, I just need to do some editing, so probably in a week (possibly a little less?) it'll be up and book 4 will be done. There will be a book 5. That will be the final book of this series. I keep coming up with more ideas for it, so it might be longer than I planned, but that's fine. You know me and alternate endings...I never planned to kill off Finn. I just needed her to have a moment of panic over the thought of possibly losing him. And the readers, too lol. But while writing the end of the last chapter, I had the idea of how the rest of the series could go if he DID die. It'd be very sad and dramatic and it'd be MUCH shorter. So I MIGHT write it as an alternate version (after book 5 is done, obviously). Might not. We'll see.

Next, I feel the need to explain why I said Rachel getting the role was partially because of April Rhodes. From what I recall from watching the show, Rachel had to really fight to convince the director to cast her. She was also a lot younger. Having her get the role in her senior year made more sense to me AND worked better for my story. And it made sense that if these directors have never heard of Rachel Berry before, and she knows famous April Rhodes, why not have the superstar fight the battle for her?

Third, about the benefit songs: Rachel sang "Rise Up" by Andra Day with the other AA patients. For "Getting Married Today", I pulled from three sources; Glee, Carol Burnett, and a random video I found on YouTube. Mercedes sang the soprano parts in the Glee version, just as she did in my story, the hysterically shouted "OH, SHUT UP!" was from Carol Burnett's version in Putting it Together (which is very funny, I highly suggest you go watch it), and her sliding onto the floor on her stomach and crawling under the piano was done by a talented woman in a video I saw on YouTube. I feel bad for forgetting her name, but it was very funny and well done, so I used it. Finn sang "She's Been Through The Fire" by Brian Rhea (I found it by accident and loved it and thought it was perfect). And finally, "Survivor" by Destiny's Child. I apologize for how poorly I rewrote the lyrics. That's freaking hard to do! But I wanted to make them fit as best I could. I wrote it in one session and just kind of hoped for the best. Also, I was basing it off of Kelly Clarkson's Kellyoke version. It's awesome. Go watch it.