What We Do In The Shadows: "Jen..."
Summary: There are unexpected consequences when Laszlo seeks a new human familiar…
Part CVI…
"Hey, hey…I'll take one of those while it's still warm!" Eloise, stopping Claude in his white uniform with tray of ribs headed for the main table.
Uniform no longer white…
"Sorry…" Eloise, squeaking a bit as she eyes the stain on his whites. "These are just so good. And I'm on a strict carnivore diet."
"Uh…Sure, ma'am. No problem, it'll clean right up." Claude, avoiding a direct stare. Lowering tray, Eloise taking a rib and plate eagerly…She eyeing him a mo, even as she starts chowing down.
Cute…If a bit hefty…Looking him over. "Maybe I could help you there."
"Oh, no…It's fine. Excuse me, ma'am. Gotta get these over." Claude hurries off.
"Sure, pal. But keep 'em comin'. I'll be lookin' for ya." She beams. Eyeing him again with puzzled look.
Cut to camera in kitchen corner a bit later…
"Well…That's her." Claude smiles. "And damn, if she's not a werewolf again, like last time. And still a knockout, though she was white last time. Hmmn…?" eyes questioner.
"Oh, about…Fifty-sixty years ago. She must have reincarnated…Oh, no…" he raises finger, grinning. "I'm not dumb enough to try to guess her age, even if you guys swear you won't tell her I did."
"But it's her. Isn't she something? Do you guys know anything?" eyes the crew.
"Look, I know she works with them but she's not part of your documentary clients, really. Well, how's about her name at least?" careful look.
"Eloise…That's cute. She was 'Nora' last time. Weird about the werewolf repeat. Some kind of Fate thing? Or does she just attract them. Pheromones or hormones or something? I mean I haven't become a vampire again, and the VH thing is really part of my Redemption, so…"
What?" pauses.
"To be honest, I'm not really sure…But I wanna help her, of course. And hey, I have a direct link to the afterlife. And Doc VH on my side, plus Dracula. We'll find something. Is she having troubles?" anxious look.
"Look, I was straight with you about me. She's not one of your folks, if you know anything…?"
…
"Jan Horton…Mr. Laszlo Cravensworth, one of the new owners and our hosts tonight." Professor Devers introduces the two, Jan among several new arrivals from the Staten Island Historical Society. "Laszlo, Jan here may look young but she's one of our key board members and she's an expert on Staten Island history." The young-looking, indeed just out of teens, but for the sober adult outfit, brunette smiling at Laszlo…
She eyeing the camera crew, just a bit nervously…Guys, Samarta, pleading look. Fellow journalist, vamp seeking redemption here, explain all later. Then redirecting look to Laszlo who eyes her.
Hey, Las…
"Really? Fascinating. I've studied the local history for some time…" Laszlo, slightest of nods her way.
Cut to Laszlo just a bit later, he and some of the crew having slipped down to the basement, he on a quite comfortable, if not the White King of the living room, sofa…
"Well, I'll be damned if I weren't already… It's my old girl Rita, you know the one who had a 'lesbian relationship' in the 18…90s with Nadja while she and I were getting it on well ourselves. I don't know what this may bode. Though I suppose she might actually have taken an interest in Staten Island history, though she's not lived around here for many years. I say, be an interesting thing if she went to that much trouble to join the Society years ago to keep tabs on me and Nadja. Or perhaps at the behest of Simon Devious, the little wanker wouldn't be above anything. Though I can't believe a nice girl…Really nice, in the sexual department…Like Rita…Would go for being a spy for that true wanker. But I had to play the genial host and human fellow and couldn't get a chance to question her at length. Though we did get in a quick one on the basement stairs.
Cut to shot of Laszlo and Rita/"Jan" in passionate embrace on the basement stairs…
"Fortunately, Nadja has not as yet seen her so…Appreciate it if you chaps would also keep it buried."
Cut to Nadja, still later, on the living room sofa…
"Guess who came to our party, in the guise of a member of that Historical Society, playing human…None other than my old friend and lover, Rita, calls herself 'Jon or Jan or something now. And she's married…To a human, can you believe it? Some fellow who runs a hotel chain in upstate New York and must be awfully busy not to notice his girl/wife is a vampire." Shrugs. "Some humans, clueless."
"Anyway I spotted her talking to Laszlo from the great hall and didn't recognize her. Fortunately for her I was in a good mood and let it pass, him talking eagerly to another woman, un- or fully human. But after I showed Char the basement and we got a load of Nandor's ridiculous battle reenactment…And spoke a bit with that nice daughter of Dracula, Althea, back upstairs…I caught up with ole Ri and we managed to slip off to talk. Just talk, she's married now and plays it respectable. Though I suspect there's still some life in the old vamp girl yet." Nods.
"You will be so good as not to mention her to Laszlo…Not that I have anything to hide, of course…Not yet." Smile. "But he might be annoyed to find out we'd deceived him back in the 1890s days. Thanks."
"Not really time to start a new or revive an old relationship, anyway." She notes, a bit wanly.
…
Samarta, having slipped away as 'Jan Horton', to "view alone what wonderful things you've done to the old place"…With part of crew upstairs in bedroom…
"Ok…We gotta be quick. No, I am not spying for Simon, that's over. Yes, I did join the Historical Society as 'Jan' to spy on your guys in a vague way. He had hopes then of having their old place condemned. Anyway, he has no idea I've come and your guys don't know my relationship with him, nor that I'm past that so…Please, as fellow journalists of a sort? I'm really here to help. Yes, for the Vampire Hunters…Seems you need an active good deed of some sort to get your Redemption ticket stamped and this is mine. Not to mention, to cover all this? What a potential scoop, huh?" she beams.
"Yeah, I did go by the name Rita in the last hundred or two years…I thought it sounded neat and after 1400 years you get tired of the same name. 'Rita' kind of added a little spice, you know? Yes…" sigh. "I have had a 'relationship' with Laszlo…" faint smile. "And Nadja…" shrug. "It's hard to be alone and Immortal, you know. And well, I've always been a little jealous over the past hundred plus, of their relationship. It's really hard to find a good mate, you know? Especially an Immortal one. And especially when you look…Well, kinda vulnerable even if 1600 plus years old. Even the vamp boys saw me as easy prey." Grimace. "But Laszlo, well…You know him, he's just such a charmer." Beam. "Not that I want to break them up, hey, I'm risking my existence and chance at Redemption to help 'em. But he is such a cutie, I couldn't help wanting one last quickie back there." Hmmn?
"Oh…Nadja's great too. To be honest, I'm more inclined to guys and was really just experimenting. And in any case, if you ask me…? She's not really big on girls though her demon likes to try a spectrum in her sexuality. Oh, I should keep a note of that, huh? As a potential important factoid on vampires…Bisexuality or at least a keen willingness to experiment…In Las' case even with animals, I've gathered. Bestiality…Nods. I've heard that's big with some. Never got into it myself. Maybe cause as a human I lived with animals all the time."
"My what? Husband?…Oh, Bill. Yeah…I got a husband, human. Upstate. I needed an address and some kind of family when I broke into journalism. He's a nice fellow, bit clueless but very, very hard-working, real family guy type, good provider. It's kinda for convenience on both sides as he was from Canada and needed a green card? Though I am fond of him…He reminds me of my dad, Uraic, one of Alaric's commanders?" smile. "But come on, let a girl have a private life. He's not my cow, I swear."
"Anyway…I can't tell you exactly the details but I am here on behalf of the Hunters to help support this mission. Kinda 'Mission:Impossible', you know…I used to love that show. And this time I get to be in disguise." Grins. "But, I promise you guys an exclusive when alls over if I survive. Just put me on the byline or credits? Great. Well, we best separate before Laszlo or Nadja comes looking for more or an explanation. Nope, he didn't even ask why I was here." Slight wince.
"Though I suppose that's about typical for vamp hookups."
…
"So, are you enjoying yourselves, Dr. Acura…Miss Acura?" Laszlo beams at the Acuras/Draculas.
"Very much so, Mr. Cravensworth and again thank you so much for inviting me and my daughter." Acura nods, smiling.
"Well, thank your ole friend Nandor…Where is he, by the way?" Laszlo looking round.
We do have a truce on for tonight I believe that includes no out of the way staking…
"He went upstairs with that other lady…Didn't catch her name, sorry, sir." Althea notes, sipping punch.
Oh…Nandor, you dirty dog, Laszlo considers with smile. Still, best to be careful there. Nadja hates to see women under thrall taken advantage of unless she's the one taking advantage or part of the three-, four-, etc, some and a thrallee like Martha, very enthusiastic and all can often get a bit overexcited…Leading to death by extreme…Exhaustion. Death by overexcited vampire attack and bloodletting. Death by overexcited vampire attack and general tearing up of enthralled one. Or, and more often than one might suppose, death by accident…Dislocation of neck in severe sexual coupling, smothering in mattress, joyously tossing about a room.
Heck, one or two vamps have been the victims in a case or two I've heard tell of…These enthralled types can get pretty horny.
"Oh, there he is, with the lady…" Althea points.
"Hello…Have you met my fiancée and former wife, Marwa…" Nandor addressing waiter.
Martha…Marwa/Martha hisses.
"Right, Martha." Nod.
"And he means former girlfriend now fiancée, of course." Smile.
"Ah, Nandor!" Laszlo calls.
Acid test…Stay close…Nandor hisses to Marwa/Martha…
"Laszlo? Philippe…We are very good friends now…The doc and I." Nandor notes to Laszlo. "Miss Althea…" smile. "Miss Acura here is a brilliant cavalry commander, Laszlo. Her last charge shattered my ranks."
Althea, slight blush, smile… "Just applying some things my dad told me about the battle, sir."
"Modern women…They can do…Anything." Laszlo smiles. "My wife Nadja is the same way…Can take up any subject. Dick!" he calls to Professor Devers, now briefly chatting with Jen's David, Jen, Ginny and Jacqueta Zeller, and Jacqueta's friend Brittany. "Come over and meet Philippe Acura and his daughter, both true fellow buffs of history!"
David eyeing Jen who rolls eyes…History, honey?
We were gonna leave twenty minutes ago…And Susie's pooped.
You'd think he was the enthralled minion wishing to guard the Master…
"Sure, go…" she nods.
…
Colin, solus, having retreated to his selected miserable room in the basement…
"So…Nandor has his Redemption. Little Guillermo gets a fortune and even manages to stand up to my pointing out what a worthless fiend he is…Kinda deplorable there, given he's hanging out with an enslaved young woman. Guess he was more than just a dweeb, a true predator. And Laszlo and Nadja happy in their new home…Surrounded by their little army of brain-dead minions. But with the so-called great Van Helsing laboring on their behalf from the afterlife with the present life Dracula, his daughter the Slayer, and a crew of Vampire Hunters determined to 'save' them."
"And all the support I have? Simon Devious and his motley crew of losers."
"Life and especially, Unlife, are just not fair…But…" Colin puts up a hand. "As an EV, I'm used to having to fight against the odds and show patience. Believe me, I'm the model for Patience strangling the sculptor of Patience on a Monument. I can patience you to death and have. Though it's hard, really, I won't deny it. Well, the game's only begun and Redemption can be forfeited. Lets remember, now our hero is all 'oooh save the innocent, sacrifice for all'. That can be a great advantage to a scheming putz like me." Nods.
…