Sansa
That day, Sansa spent the whole day in her room embroidering and reading the books that her maids brought her. She didn't want to think about the last few weeks and what Joff had done to her. She was nervous all day long and had difficulty swallowing sips of tea, and it was even more difficult for her to eat anything. The maids said she had lost weight and turned pale. However, it was hard for her to force herself to eat. Whatever she touched made her disgusted. She tried to forget about where she was and what person she had become. Sansa was reading her favorite books about knights and their ladies. She kept thinking what an idiot she had been to think she would be happy with Joffrey. She fell asleep with fear and woke up several times during the night sweating, filled with terror. The scene of being raped and strangled and the feeling that she was about to die kept replaying in her head.
-Please, let me go-she screamed in her sleep. She felt like Joffrey was on top of her all the time, and when he wasn't there, she thought he would show up any minute. She put on several pairs of dresses, hoping that such layers of clothing would discourage him from using her body again. The maids looked at her strangely when she went to sleep in a thick layer of clothes when it was hot outside. Sansa, however, did not answer any of their questions only told them to bring books for her.
But when she started reading romance books, she couldn't find peace, so she chose the legends of Westeros. Even though they had never been her favorite books, she finally felt at peace. That day, she and her maids went for a walk to the seaside to admire the weather. Sansa barely ate a piece of bread in the morning and looked at the blue sea, thinking about how many kilometers separated her and her family now. If they found out what Joffrey did to her, they would do anything to kill him. Sansa had no doubts. A few days earlier, Joff had passed her without a word in the hallway, then flashed that evil smirk of his at her. Sansa wondered what they would do about her marriage and whether the council was willing to break off the engagement. On the one hand, it sounded wonderful, but on the other, she didn't want to be the king's mistress. Even though she spent many nights together with him, she felt that she had nothing in common with him and wanted it to stay that way. When she was close to Joffrey, she began to feel sorry for him and tried to understand the motives of his meanness, but she knew that this was disastrous, because he would never change and would use her favor as bait to further oppress her.
Sansa heard from courtiers that the fighting between the Lannisters and her brother had intensified recently, and how Joffrey had become enraged when he learned of Robb's successive victories. He became furious and during one of the dinners he smiled at her and said that during dinner he would serve her her brother's head on a plate. Sansa hoped that Robb would survive and that even if he failed to win the war against the Crown, he would take her home. She no longer had the strength for constant fear and all she had left was faith in the Gods who would no longer allow her to have anything to do with Joffrey. She believed that he had done too much harm to her for the gods to leave her with him for long. Some said gods didn't exist and truth be told, she doubted them too, but she knew she had no choice.
Returning to the palace, she encountered Joffrey again, who treated her like his greatest enemy and with contempt. People were gossiping that the king was looking for a new wife, so Sansa hoped he would forget about her as a lover. Even if he had to beat her to death because of Robb's victories, it was better than taking her to bed and forcing her to have sex. The maids took Sansa to her chamber and dressed her in a light blue tulle dress that Joffrey had given her. Even though the fabric was fine, Sansa felt like the dress that fit her was poisonous and disgusting... She had forgotten who she got it from. She remembered then that it was only a cloth. As the maids were fastening her corset, Sansa suddenly felt sick. She lost consciousness and fell to the floor.
She didn't remember anything from that moment. All she could see was the shimmering light of the sun before her eyes. She felt like a limp log of wood and fell to the ground. She felt very sick. When she woke up, the maids laid her on the bed and one of them, a light blonde who had recently worked at the castle, washed her face with a wet cloth. She stroked her cheeks in a friendly manner while Sansa mumbled something. Sansa heard comments in her sleep about how she hadn't eaten, but she didn't have the strength to respond. Suddenly she heard that all the maids had left. However, she had the impression that there was someone else in the room. Frightened, she quickly woke up and saw a fair-haired woman smiling at her friendly.
- Lady, you finally got up - the woman smiled and wiped her forehead with a wet cloth. Sansa was speechless, closed her eyes, and laid her head back on the pillow. - Lady, you have to eat, you haven't eaten for a long time and you're pale. "Maybe I will die and then he will never touch me again," she thought bitterly and shed a tear. She used to think that life was like a fairy tale in which she would play the main role. Then Joffrey appeared and fulfilled all her dreams, she was to become his queen and the mother of his children. She dreamed of a beautiful wedding, romantic love, and a passionate wedding night. Now she knew well that princes are not like knights from fairy tales, and the wedding night is full of pain, tears and blood, even if pleasure is felt, it has nothing to do with passion. The blonde maid stepped aside and soon brought her breakfast. Sansa wasn't even interested in what was on the plate, she instinctively took a piece of bread and quickly washed it down with water.
-Thank you,- she whispered. She would like to have the opportunity to get to know the servants better one day and have a friend like Shae, but she knew perfectly well that no one here was worthy of her trust. The maid realized that Sansa didn't want to see her and left the chamber, but before she could go outside, another maid appeared, shouting at Sansa.
-Lady, we need to get you dressed and ready. The king wants to visit you.
Sansa felt water in her throat and was unable to swallow a single swallow. She was stunned and felt like her worst dream had just come true. She tried to swallow the drink so as not to choke and started coughing loudly.
The door to the chamber first opened and then closed quietly. Sansa smelled a disgusting smell and then remembered that it was her fiancé's perfume. Joff smelled like an ocean of withered and decaying flowers, intense and distinct. She will always associate this scent with him. He walked slowly as if without soul and emotions, he didn't say anything from a distance. Sansa didn't even have time to get up and get dressed before her maids left. The terrified girl pulled her dress tight and pretended to be busy eating. When she saw Joffrey's pale and emotionless face looking at her from a distance as if a ghost was looking at a human, she quickly stood up and bowed before him. -Your Grace, I'm sorry I look like this, but I fainted and spent the last hours in bed, sorry, the maids wanted to dress me, I'll change my clothes if you let me - she said in a frightened voice Joffrey didn't answer, he just looked her over from head to toe with a critical eye.
-Did I allow this?- he asked, looking at her as if pursing his thick lips in disgust. Sansa stopped and looked at him in surprise, her pupils dilated.
-Your Grace, I'm sorry I... -Sansa moaned as Joffrey grabbed her hair tightly.
-You're so stupid... don't ever do that again- he said, grabbing half of her hair and pulling it towards himself with his hand. Some of them got stuck between his fingers. Sansa moaned loudly and squealed, tears falling from her eyes. -I will never do that again, I promise I will always dress nicely, Your Grace... I promise. Then Joffrey placed a finger on her lips and gently released her hair, he did it slowly, looking clearly into her eyes. Sansa watched in horror as her hair fell to the floor. Joff glared at her like she was his worst enemy.
-I don't care about what you wear, you stupid girl. You speak without asking, and I don't allow it - he said without emotion as if for him she was still the same Sansa with whom he hadn't spent all those nights.
-Forgive me, Lord-Sansa said quietly.
Joff pulled away and looked at her with contempt. Sansa looked at him terrified, thinking that what he was about to say would hurt a lot.
-I regret ever touching you,- he said dryly.
-You didn't deserve this,- he added and grabbed her hand tightly.
-Please, I…- Sansa couldn't control her tears anymore.
-Your brother is a butcher and a traitor. He had my men killed and then hung their bodies. Their families would be left destitute - Joffrey pretended to care about them for a while. He looked at her as if he wanted to order her to be hanged. Sansa began to shake, even though she wanted to act with dignity. She knew that Joffrey was more furious than ever and that she didn't have many ideas on how to calm him down. 'So maybe Robb will finally win the war and I'll be free,' she thought, staring at the ground, trying not to meet Joffrey's furious gaze.
-Your Grace- Sansa said with true compassion in her voice.
-Whatever my brother did, I'm sorry about it, he's a traitor,
and you are my true love and I never supported his actions - she felt like she had just stabbed Robb in the heart, but she knew she had to do this.. There was no other choice.
-I should have killed you a long time ago, I hate you- he said mockingly and grabbed her cheek tightly, forcing her to look into his eyes.
-I never wanted this. I just wanted to marry you. I swear-she said, a small tear falling from her eyes. She wanted so much to maintain her honor and not tarnish the values of her family, but she also wanted to live and survive. She hoped the gods would forgive her. She was weak but had no control over her situation. Joffrey looked at her as if he were seeing her for the first time.
-Your family ruined it. All. Your father wanted to take my throne, and the rest declared war on the crown. I was favorably disposed towards you, Sansa.- His pupils dilated greatly, forcing Sansa to look deep into his eyes. She had a feeling the king wasn't lying.
-I know, Your Grace. But I only wanted to marry you, I have nothing to do with intrigue, I swear- Sansa sobbed, and Joffrey wiped away her tears with his thumb, looking at her with an icy and indifferent gaze.
Joffrey grabbed her wrist tightly.
-I want to believe you, there is only one way to do it - something like intrigue appeared in his eyes, he looked at her with piercing eyes, as if he intended to study her reactions to potential imprisonment in the torture chamber.
-What should I do? – Sansa asked gently.
-You will send a letter to your family saying that you swear allegiance only to me- Joffrey announced, looking at her suspiciously.
Sansa was about to say something when Joffrey grabbed her tightly by the neck and pinned her against the wall. He watched with satisfaction as she blushed, then released her neck and delivered several hard blows to both cheeks. Sansa felt blood pouring from one of them. Joff wiped it off with his finger and then put it in Sansa's mouth.
-Or you'll taste your blood, you ungrateful whore- Sansa moaned in fear. The king squeezed her neck hard once more, then grabbed her head hard as if to tear it off, and forced the girl to kneel. She felt how hard he was pressing against her neck and how much her spine hurt now. He bent her like a doll and then forced her to kneel in front of him.
He quickly unbuttoned his pants and grabbed her chin tightly. Terrified by such a quick action, Sansa looked at him meekly.
-Take it, I want you to put it in your mouth - he said with satisfaction. Sansa walked up to his legs and raised herself slightly, opening her mouth. Joff stopped her, cupping her cheek again while her mouth was open. He scolded her when she tried to close it.
-Look at me with your eyes wide open, you little whore- he said, wiping a tear from Sansa's cheek. She felt humiliated, but she had experienced many such moments and knew that Joffrey was no longer her true and good prince and she was no longer the lady of his heart. Joffrey moaned as Sansa took his entire cock into her mouth. He quickly grabbed her head and forcefully penetrated her throat, examining the marks left by the beating, from which blood flowed. Her eyes were wet and puffy from lack of sleep and constant stress, her hair was disheveled. Sansa gagged and choked as Joffrey pounded harder and harder into her throat. She was prepared for the usual, but suddenly it turned out that it would be different. Joff let go of her as if she had been scalded and she closed her eyes in fear of punishment as she was sure she had done something wrong.
Suddenly, Joffrey released her like a toy and she quickly gasped for air and staggered to the floor. The king buttoned his pants and looked at her blankly. Sansa was still kneeling in front of him, brushing back her messy hair.
-Have I done something wrong, Lord?
Joff grimaced, clearly concerned about his erection problems. -That... that's not what I want right now- he told her quickly. I don't want you to please me with this now, I want you to do what I asked you today, preferably now.
-As you say, Your Grace.
-Get up.
Sansa quickly got up from the floor, wiping the blood from her cheek with her hand. Joff quickly grabbed her hand and rubbed her wound himself. He looked at her as if he had had enough of her. She felt like her heart was going crazy with pain and jumping hard. Whenever he appeared or touched her, she would tremble, no matter how much she promised to control herself. Joffrey moved a few millimeters closer to her ear, pressing his lips to her ear.
-If you choose me, you will suffer forever. Even if I promise to protect you.
-Why?- Sansa asked naively. Joff shook her hand and led her to the mirror. He brushed her hair back and brushed it back slightly. Then he pulled her tightly against him from behind. Sansa didn't move, even though her heart was beating like crazy.
-I love causing pain too much. This won't change- Sansa gently tried to free herself from his arms. She did it gently so as not to provoke him, but he noticed it anyway. He grabbed her waist tightly and kissed her neck.
-Neither for you nor for any woman - he said in a slightly aggressive tone.
-I understand, Your Grace. I want to give you lots of pleasure, Sansa said quietly.
These words irritated him. He grabbed her hair tightly and forced her head back. Sansa groaned in pain.
-Do not say that. You irritate me. I'm fed up with you. Be silent if you don't know what to say. You'll stop being so naive if you spend a few years with me, or maybe months will be enough for you. - he said, gripping her hair tightly. Sansa squeaked but didn't say anything.
-Forgive me...I...- she said in a broken voice.
-Are you afraid of this?- He suddenly let go of her hair and pulled her closer, turning her so that she was looking deep into his eyes.
-Very. I'm very scared, Sansa looked at her hands, wet with the blood she was wiping away and crying. Everything was blurry and looked terrible. Joff didn't answer. He looked at her with obvious satisfaction, then gave her an icy and contemptuous look and left her room. Sansa couldn't stand it. She burst into loud tears. She wanted so badly to go home, to be held by her mother in her arms. She wanted so much that no one would ever hurt her again.