When Subaru woke, he almost felt like he had never died, that he had never had his place in the manor disturbed. He was in a guest room, not as grand as the one he had woken up in the first time, but not as bare as his servant's quarters.
It took him a moment to remember that he had died, and that this was once again his first day in the manor. Luckily, he managed to get back here even with his stomach intact.
After Reinhard had left, Emilia offered to bring Subaru back to the manor with her, which he had eagerly accepted. She had been trying to figure out how to contact Ram when a dragon carriage rolled up to the ruins of the loot house, with Ram in the driver's seat. She apparently decided that Emilia's absence for most of the day was cause enough to cut the trip short and return to the manor.
The pink haired maid hadn't been particularly impressed by Emilia's declaration that they'd be taking Subaru back with them. He was pretty sure he had heard her say something along the lines of; "Lady Emilia, we cannot be taking stray dogs back to Roswaal's manor. It might have fleas, and we don't know where it's been."
Subaru knew her well enough not to take offence, but he had still argued with her for the sake of it.
The carriage ride had been uneventful, and when they arrived, Rem had said that Roswaal would be gone until the next day. At that point the emotions that had been driving Subaru gave out, and he practically crawled to the room Ram escorted him to.
It was still early in the morning, but if he went wandering, he'd probably run into Beatrice again. He had no desire to spend the morning recovering from having his mana sucked dry. He'd just wait until the maids or Emilia came to see him.
"So I'll spend my time productively. I need a plan." Not that his previous plans had worked out, but there was a first time for everything. What were his options?
Firstly, stay up late on the day of the attack, and see what happened. Hopefully that would let him raise the alarm, and if not… he'd have a better idea of what to prepare for next time.
He shivered. That would be accepting another death, and it wouldn't be as painless as when he died in his sleep. And, it would be another reset after the residents of the manor began to warm up to him. Where he'd have to save Emilia from Elsa again. Where no one would remember him.
He ruled that option out. It didn't even deserve to be called plan B. It would be plan Z, a last resort only, if he couldn't do anything else.
Second. He could warn Roswaal that the manor might be attacked, but despite his clownish appearance, Roswaal didn't seem like an idiot. He likely already knew that saboteurs could attack the manor, after failing to steal Emilia's insignia.
He already knew, but they were still caught off-guard, and Subaru still died. There wasn't anything he could say that would convince him that he needed additional precautions on that day, without seeming suspicious. After all, he was a strange person who appeared to stop an assassin out of nowhere. If he then went on to perfectly predict a second attack, he'd be suspected of working with those assassins to raise his reputation.
Or perhaps…
He felt an aversion to giving away his only trump card, but he couldn't come up with a better idea.
His third option, he could reveal return by death. Emilia wasn't the type of person who would force him to abuse the ability, and she was in charge, technically. He didn't even have to say how it activated. She'd probably be upset if she thought he had to go through a lot of pain every time he used it.
If I just told her, she could vouch for me, and that would make me seem much less suspicious. He put his hands against his face, acting as if mildly scandalised, Maybe she'll even give me a deeply personal secret that she'd never tell anyone, so that I could use it to convince her in future, if…
He slowed.
If the worst came to pass.
It wasn't a fool-proof plan by any means, but he felt confident in it's success. All he needed to do was wait for Emilia.
Which left what he spend his time on in the manor. He picked up a book from the desk, and leafed through it. There weren't many pictures in it, mostly portraits of noble-looking people. He hadn't put any effort into learning how to read. Maybe he would take Emilia's suggestion from last time, and stay in the mansion as a guest, so that he could spend his time brushing up on things he really should know.
Reading was a vital skill back on Earth, and he didn't think it would be any different in this world.
Also… Julius had mentioned that he had a good spirit affinity didn't he? Subaru vaguely remembered Puck saying something similar in his first loop, when he was searching for the insignia with Emilia. It would be a waste if he didn't capitalise on it.
Someone knocked on the door. "Stray mutt— I mean, honoured guest, are you awake?"
Ram's voice, and Ram's insults.
"I'm awake." he called. He put down the book, and opened the door. Ram stood there alone. Perhaps since he wasn't injured, they didn't see the need to both check on him.
"Lady Emilia requests your presence in the garden. If you require it, I will guide you there."
"It's fine, I remember the way." He replied. In fact, from his previous loop, he was familiar with the entire layout of the manor. He could probably make it out to the garden blindfolded, provided he didn't fall down a flight of stairs.
Ram's eyes hardened briefly, but it passed so quickly that Subaru thought he imagined it. She bowed, "As you wish, honoured guest. I will be in the kitchen preparing breakfast with my sister if you need anything."
Subaru's bedroom was tucked away in a far corner of the manor, so it took him a while to get out of the maze of corridors. When he reached the garden, Emilia was communing with her spirits, standing in the middle of the field, the lights dancing all around her.
"Heya. Morning, Subaru." Puck floated up to Subaru's eye level, and twirled in place. "I've been dumped here, since my presence scares away all the little ones. It seems I have a lot to thank you for. I hear you saved Emilia thrice yesterday."
"I didn't do much, honestly." Subaru admitted. "I helped Reinhard and Julius save her, I helped you save her, and I helped her save herself."
"Ah, but three third-saves add up to a full save." Puck said sagely. "It's a debt I won't soon forget. I owe you one."
"Yeah, about that." Subaru said. "There's something I want to discuss with Emilia, and you too, I guess."
"Uwaaa!? I am I not trustworthy to you, Subaru? After I've opened my heart to you so readily?"
"Oh, cut it out, you talking cat." He seized Puck out of the air, coddling him in his arms. "Your only good traits are your adorable face and loveable fur. And the ice blasting, that's pretty useful. But what's with that awful time limit!?"
"Having fun, you two?"
Subaru and Puck snapped to attention, as Emilia strode up to them. "Subaru, how are you? Did you sleep alright?"
"I slept wonderfully, like a homecoming after many weeks abroad. Actually, I was hoping to talk to you about something important."
He had considered how to go about admitting this, but eventually decided that plain and simple was the best bet. Puck would be able to tell if tried to hide things anyway.
"I can—" return by death.
The world stilled in the middle of his sentence. All sound cut off abruptly, he could no longer feel the wind on his skin, and he was held in place by a force he couldn't surpass. Even his eyes were unable to move, locked onto Emilia's curious face.
What's going on? What's happening!?
The colour slowly faded from the world, and from the edge of his vision, a black mist rose. It swirled, and reached out, in the form of a hand.
It approached Subaru, passing right through his chest.
What's it doing? Stop. Stop! Stopstopstopstop—
The hand closed on his heart, and the worst pain Subaru had ever felt shot through him. Rationality left him, and all he could do was scream incoherently. But the stilled world didn't allow even the quietest sounds to escape.
"Subaru? Is something wrong?"
He was gasping for breath. Why? He hadn't been exercising, he was screaming. Had been screaming. Had been trying to scream.
He gingerly raised a hand to his chest, feeling his heartbeat. It pounded heavily, giving him some measure of reassurance. He was no longer in pain, no longer felt like screaming. But he remembered, and he was afraid.
It had triggered when he started talking about return by death. It couldn't be unrelated.
"Sorry, just got a bit disoriented." If he couldn't tell anyone about his ability out of fear of that hand, then his grand plan was worthless. What could he do? How could he survive?
"Did you think of something you wanted? I can't really offer much, but if it's possible, I'll try and do it."
"Yes!" He said, louder than he intended. "I mean, yeah, I have got one idea. Julius said I had a pretty good spirit affinity, and I kind of wanted to learn how that worked."
Emilia brightened. "Of course! I'm a spirit arts user as well, I can teach you. Puck will help too, he's the one who taught me."
"I've been volunteered against my will." Puck said in mock outrage. "I guess I have no choice then. I'll work you to the bone while Lia is busy studying, and she can teach you a little in the evenings, if she has time."
Emilia pouted cutely. "I owe him too. I want to help more than just a little."
Puck started flying circles around Subaru's head. "What do I do? My daughter is asking for something so earnestly, but I can't allow her to get so close to such a nasty-eyed boy. What do you think, Subaru?"
"I think you should study for her, so that dear Mili can spend her time helping me study, wearing glasses like a senior in school."
"'Mili'? That's a cute nickname. Maybe I should start using it."
"Please don't" Emilia interrupted. "I don't want to spend all day helping you, but I'll be sure to teach you every day. I'll get my studies done without a problem."
"Lady Emilia!" Rem appeared behind them. "Are you alright?" She looked at Subaru with a strange expression. "I thought I…"
Ram was hurrying behind her, and caught up, tugging on Rem's sleeve. "I'm terribly sorry, lady Emilia, honoured guest. Rem got a bit confused. We are here to inform you that Lord Roswaal has returned."
"I don't mind." Emilia said. "I'm perfectly fine, Rem, though I don't see why you would think I wasn't. We'll be right in."
Rem glanced at Subaru again, but obediently followed her sister back to the manor.
That didn't happen last time. What changed? He shook his head clear, and followed after them.
As planned, he asked to stay as a guest in the manor, and be provided with materials to study with, namely paper, ink, and children's books.
Roswaal had acted strange at the request. It was like he was wavering between approving and disappointed. He had finally said, "I suppose I should have guessed from your work in the capital. You are not the type to leave things to chance, are you Subaru?"
Subaru wasn't sure what kind of idea Roswaal had gotten about him, but he had approved his request, and sent Ram to bring some simple books up to his room.
Emilia had gone up to her room to study, which left Subaru's first magic lesson in Puck's capable hands. They had gone out into the garden, 'So that we don't make a mess if you explode.' He was pretty sure the cat was joking, but he was a little apprehensive when he sat down on the grass.
"That explains us two, but what are you doing out here, little miss ghost librarian?"
"Betty has never heard of a goast, and she is older than the rude boy, in fact." Beatrice answered. "Betty wants to spend time with bubby, you have nothing to do with it, I suppose. Betty wouldn't be near you without the wind to carry away your stench, in fact."
"Aw, don't be like that. Subaru is trying really hard you know."
"And what's this about my stench?" He sniffed his clothes. "I'm still clean."
"Betty is referring to the miasma hanging over the rude boy, in fact. The mark of the witch, a sign of her interest in him, for good or ill, I suppose."
"The witch?" Subaru asked. "Do you mean Satella?"
"Most people wouldn't dare use that name, or even have to ask it. You must have lived an interesting life, Subaru." said Puck. "Don't worry though. If you were a part of her schemes, I would have picked up on it. So please, Betty, don't worry him like that."
Beatrice turned her head with a huff, utterly unrepentant.
Subaru wanted to ask more questions about why there was a mark from this world's literal devil on him, but allowed the matter to drop. He'd have time to investigate that later.
"Well, that aside, the first thing we'll do is check the affinity of your gate. An affinity is like the flavour of magic you can use. Most people only have one affinity, but some people have more. For instance, Roswaal has the affinity for all four basic elements, plus the two rare ones."
Subaru raised a hand. "Master Puck, why does this matter? I'm told my gate isn't that good. And what is a gate, anyway?"
Puck nodded knowingly. "A gate is an organ located in all living creatures. It allows mana to pass in and out of the body. Yours isn't that good? Then you won't be able to use your mana freely, and it will limit the spells you can use. But that's what the spirit arts are for. Instead of your own limited mana, you'll use the mana in the air, using spirits as pseudo-gates. Your affinity is important because spirits that share your affinity are easier to make contracts with. Even with a good spirit affinity, contracts will put a strain on your body. I'll be measuring that too."
He stretched out his tail, placing it on Subaru's forehead. "Myou, myou, myou, myou… Done! Your affinity is Yin, or shadow. Hmm."
"What's wrong? Is Yin a bad affinity to have?"
Puck shook his head. "No, it's just harder to find Yin spirits wandering around. We might have to teach you with a different kind of spirit. Luckily, your spirit affinity is just as good as you said. With a little bit of training, I'd say that you could contract three spirits easily. Maybe four if one of them was Yin-aligned, but that would be pushing it."
"So how do we start?" Subaru asked eagerly.
"Hmm. I guess we should start by getting your mana moving. You'll need to get the feeling for it, and even for a spirit arts user, it's handy to be able to cast spells with your own mana. Let's see… Betty, would you say Shamak would be a good choice?"
"A good spell to circulate mana, but the boy won't cast it correctly the first time, even with help, I suppose." Beatrice declared flatly. She placed a hand on Subaru's chest, and made the same sound. "Myou, myou, myou, myou… I suppose."
"…I see you slipped something in there at the end."
She hummed a little. "Prepare yourself boy, this might sting, in fact."
Subaru was suddenly hit by the same sensation she had used on him during his first visit to the manor, but to a much lesser degree. He kept his yelp of pain firmly bottled up inside him. Don't annoy the ghost librarian. Lesson learned.
"Hmm, in fact. The boy's gate is not very strong, I suppose. It cannot hold the mana back if it is forcibly called on, in fact."
"But don't worry Subaru." Puck said cheerfully, "Regular use of your gate can fix that. You'll need some support to cast your first few spells though, otherwise you could permanently damage your gate. Betty, should we try and get some spirits to help circulate it instead?"
Beatrice smirked, and Subaru felt shivers run down his spine. "The boy won't be able to form a contract without an understanding of mana, I suppose. He'll be recovered enough by tonight, in time for the girl's lesson with him."
"Eh, recovered?" Subaru interjected. "I think you skipped explaining a few things."
"We need you to feel your mana, but your gate is like a broken tap." Puck explained. "If we let out a little, it will all come out at once. You won't have any mana left in your body, and you'll find it hard to move."
"But I'll be fine, right? So let's do this! I wanna do magic!"
"Betty will wait at a safe distance, I suppose." She left, moving all the way back to the door to the manor.
"She's overreacting, right?" Subaru asked nervously.
"She just doesn't want to get smoke in her dress. Alright, I need you to visualise the mana flowing through your body." He landed on top of Subaru's head, and Subaru felt a chill wash through him.
"I'll have you know, I'm great at fantasising! It's what I do best!"
He closed his eyes, and focused inward. He found his mind drifting to the chill Puck had caused, settling somewhere in his core, where he could almost feel something, just out of reach.
"When your ready, pull the mana out, and cast 'Shamak'."
Subaru followed the cat's instructions, forcing his mind to grasp the energy inside him. "Shamak!"
There was a moment of calm, then Subaru felt something pulse.
"Ah, I see what Betty meant."
Subaru exploded. Black smoke engulfed the entire garden, playing havoc on Subaru's senses. He felt suddenly drained, and fell to the ground, without the energy to keep himself upright.
The smoke gradually cleared, leaving Subaru looking up at Puck.
"That went well. Did you get a good feel for your mana?"
"Yes." Subaru said, without his usual energetic tone. "But now I'm stuck. Um, help."
"Don't worry, you'll be fine in a few hours. You should take the time to feel your gate as it absorbs mana. I'll tell everyone not to disturb you."
"Hey wait! Don't leave me here!"
A few hours after Puck abandoned him to play with Beatrice, Subaru had enough strength to get up and go back to his room. He did have a better feeling for his gate, since there had been literally nothing to do but feel his energy gradually return through his core.
He eyed his bed. He kind of wanted to collapse right into it, but he decided against it. He sat in his chair instead.
"Honoured guest, here are the materials you requested." Ram entered the room, carrying an assortment of books and paper.
She placed them on the desk near him, and retrieved one piece of paper. "Ram has graciously provided a list of i-glyphs and ro-glyphs. I will read them out to you."
"Sure, give me a second." Subaru dipped a pen in ink, a little bit messily, but Ram didn't comment on it. As they went down the list of characters, Subaru filled in the equivalent in Japanese hiragana. The i-glyphs were mostly alternate versions of those characters, with a few exceptions, which Subaru had to mark with latin letters.
The ro-glyphs were more difficult, since almost all of them had to be marked with latin. Subaru didn't even want to imagine what the ha-glyphs were like. "If they're this place's stand-in for kanji, I'll never learn them all."
"If you are thinking of ha-glyphs, there are indeed thousands, but they are only used in technical works." Ram told him. "You will not need to know them to read and write in most situations, honoured guest."
"You don't have to be so formal, you know. That kind of stuff doesn't suit me."
"You are a guest here, it wouldn't be acceptable to treat you any differently." She said. "If that is all, I need to help Rem."
She bowed, and left the room.
Subaru watched her go. Well, it's only the first day, and I'm not a co-worker anymore. She probably doesn't trust me as much.
He turned back to his paper. He had an idea to make this slightly more interesting.
"Subaru? What's this?"
"Ah, Mili! I was just studying. These glyphs are kind of similar to characters I already know, so I've been making great progress."
"I see," She looked down at him, sitting on the floor, with small cards of paper scattered around him. "But I meant, what are those? I didn't know we had paper that small."
"I made them. There's a trick you can use to get smaller pieces by folding them repeatedly. They're flash cards. They help you study by testing your memory."
"Flashkards? I've never heard of those. How do they help?"
Subaru picked up his cards, and held the deck up to her. "They have a question on one side, and the answer on the other. When you see the question, you have to try and remember the answer, then check. If you got it right, you're better at remembering in future, and if you got it wrong, you need to study more."
She sat down on the floor next to him, and looked over the cards, turning them over in her hands. "I can't read these. I've never seen characters like this."
"Yeah, I'm using the writing of my homeland for the answer side." Subaru said. "So, is it time for my spirit arts lesson? I hope it's more fun than my one with Puck."
Emilia pursed her lips. "I've heard about that. Puck said you were fine, but…"
"It's okay." He affirmed. "I've got a hold of my gate now. But it wasn't a nice process. Hopefully I never have to do that again."
"We~ll, if you're sure. Puck said I was to teach you how to speak with spirits, so I've brought one with me."
She held out a finger, and a dot of blue light appeared over it. "This is a minor water spirit. It doesn't have a name or true awareness yet, and it is currently contracted to me. I want you to try and feel what it's feeling."
Subaru nodded, and looked at the dot intently. At first, he felt nothing, then, he became aware of a… trickling. Like water flowing through a rocky stream, washing away leaves and twigs, occasionally straining against the rocks at its side, but contained. The water appeared calm, but there was an undercurrent, like it was watching the edges of the stream in anticipation.
"Is it waiting impatiently so it can go?"
Emilia clapped her hands. "You got it! This one is very loud about what it wants, so I thought you'd be able to hear it."
"Ugh, that's not very nice." He said to the spirit. "It might hurt my motivation to continue."
The feeling changed, like water washing out a dirty cut.
Subaru blinked. "Did it… understand me? Is it apologising?"
Emilia nodded happily. "Yep! You're getting this very quickly. You might be able to contract a spirit tomorrow, once your mana recovers a bit more."
"Man, I thought spirits would be more noble, but this one feels like a kid." Subaru said, as the blue light began orbiting his hand.
"Most minor spirits are. Do you like kids, Subaru? You seem to be getting on with it re~ally well."
"Whether I like them or not, they sure seem to like me. Though they seem to walk all over me if they have the chance. Could you stop flying right up to my ears?"
As the spirit got closer, Subaru could hear a bubbling sound like laughter, and it would suddenly whip around to the other side of his head, making him dizzy trying to follow it.
"Alright, come over here." Emilia scooted over to the wall on the other side of the room, and the spirit followed. "We'll try and increase the range you can sense and communicate with them now. It's pretty easy, once you get the hang of it. Just reach out, like you did before."
Subaru was vaguely disappointed that Emilia wasn't sitting next to him anymore, but he squashed that feeling as it rose. He'd have time enough for that when the attack was foiled.
"Sooo, Subaru, how are your studies progreeessing?"
They were eating lunch, on Subaru's third day at the manor. Subaru had advanced by leaps and bounds, but he still hadn't managed to contract a spirit yet. He could talk with them well enough, but they lost interest in him well before he could bring up a contract. I have to hurry up if I want to be of any use, the attack is going to happen tomorrow night.
"I've basically got the i-glyphs down, and the ro-glyphs aren't giving me much trouble anymore." He said between spoonfuls of soup. "The ha-glyphs are going to be a long-term project though. Of course, it's just memorisation, so I'll have them down sooner than you'd think."
Roswaal smiled. "Of course." Subaru hadn't seen much of the lord, so it had been a surprise when Ram had told him that he wanted to have lunch in the dining hall. "I imagine tiiime isn't much of an issue for you, living as a guest here. What of your spirit arts? How has he been doing, Lady Emilia?"
"It's amazing!" Emilia said. "He's re~ally good with the minor spirits, they love playing tricks on him."
"I kind of feel like that's a point against me." Subaru muttered, audible to the rest of the table. They ignored him.
"I'm glad to hear it. But keep in miiind that you can always rely on the manor's staff if you run into trouble."
He put down his cutlery, and lifted a hand. "A message came for you, Lady Emilia. The knight, Julius Juukulius, wanted to share the situation with the bowel hunter."
Ram brought a folded paper to Emilia, and she took it, opening it in front of her.
Her brows furrowed. "She got away. Sir Julius said that she managed to escape into the city. When they started hunting for her, they found an abandoned safe-house."
"But she is still at laaarge." Roswaal finished. "A troublesome situation."
Subaru honestly wasn't surprised. Julius probably couldn't afford to go all out in the city, but Elsa would have no reservations.
"On a different note, I wanted to discuss something with you." Subaru had thought long and hard about what to do, now that he couldn't reveal return by death. What avenue would the attackers take, and how could Subaru prevent them? He had arrived on one potential answer. Poison.
If they poisoned the manor's food supply, then Roswaal might be too weak to fight back. That would add up, since Subaru had died on the same day they had gone to resupply. Thus, he would check out the village, and ask if anyone new had been poking around.
"I want to check out the local village. I've been getting too cramped up with my studies, and I think it would be good to go out and get some air."
Roswaal's eyes widened almost imperceptibly. "I see. If that is the path you have decided upon, I'm sure we can adaaapt."
"We are running low on a few things." Ram said when Roswaal looked to her. "We had planned to get them tomorrow, but we can do so today instead."
"Great! I'll get ready right away!" Even if the attackers didn't use poison, he could warn the villagers to be on the lookout for suspicious people.
"You seem quite eager to be going, Barusu."
"I wasn't lying when I said that I'd been feeling cooped up with my studies. And what's that name?"
"Barusu is the one who said I did not have to be as formal. I am merely following your wishes."
Ram was already waiting at the door, Rem standing beside her. Subaru hadn't interacted with the blue haired maid at all during his second stay. Probably all the extra work from me staying here. He thought to himself a bit guiltily. Ram doesn't carry her weight at the best of times, and now she's been looking after me, so Rem's probably been left to pick up the slack.
"So which one of you is going to come with me?" He asked. Last time, it had been Rem, but she might have more work to do. "I can help carry the things back if you need me to."
"That won't be necessary," Ram said. "We'll both be going. Rem will do the shopping, and I will guide you around the village."
"You don't have to do that," Subaru began, but Ram cut him off. "It would be unseemly if something happened to a guest while staying at lord Roswaal's estate. Ram will simply ensure your safety."
Subaru didn't think there was any risk in a simple village visit, but he supposed Ram was more careful with an 'honoured guest' than a new butler.
"Alright. Lead the way."
The two maids didn't talk on the trip. Rem walked ahead of them, and as soon as they reached the village, she went in a seperate direction.
"So, Barusu, what did you want to see?"
"I don't know. I'll just look around, and talk to a few people." Subaru replied, looking around. Where should I start? The village chief maybe? He might keep track of the comings and goings.
"Hey mister." Subaru felt a tug on his sleeve, and he looked down. One of the children— Lucus, if Subaru remembered correctly— stood waiting. "Come and play!" He pleaded, with a mischievous look in his eyes.
I guess I have some time.
Talking to the kids had been more helpful than Subaru could have imagined. They were pretty nosy tykes, and they were more in tune with the goings-on in the village than some of the adults he talked to.
Unfortunately, there hadn't been any leads. Arlam village wasn't a popular destination, and the children were keen to tell him all about the new people they had seen. There was the messenger who had passed through on the way to the manor, and a couple of regular merchants.
One of the kids was actually new as well, the quiet purple-haired one, but she was travelling with her sister, only staying in the village while her sister hunted in the forest. Subaru doubted any of them were responsible for the attack, which meant he was back to square one.
He would have to rely on plan Z. He was pretty sure he could squeeze a shamak out of his gate, which would help attract attention to himself.
"Did Barusu really come all the way out here to play with children?" Ram asked, walking up to him. She had gotten bored after the third game, and found a seat nearby. It was getting late now, so she came to check up on him.
"I've been working hard! A break is just what I needed. I suppose we'll be going back soon?"
Ram nodded. "As soon as Rem returns."
"Um." They looked down, to see the purple-haired girl standing with a puppy asleep in her arms. "Aw, look at her!" Subaru cooed, kneeling down. "Isn't she adorable?"
"No Barusu, we already have enough strays at the manor. You can't keep it."
"I wasn't going to suggest it! What do you take me for? And what do you mean, 'enough strays'?"
"Um," the girl said again. "Would you— would you like to pet her?"
"Ram wouldn't—" the maid began, but when she saw the girl begin to tear up, she sighed and relented. "Fine." She stroked the dog's side. It stirred, and opened its eyes.
Then it bit her hand.
She let out a gasp of surprise, which was the first time Subaru have ever seen her even a little off guard.
"I'm sorry! She's usually so good!" The girl said in shock. "I didn't mean—"
"It's okay, it's okay." Subaru said, patting the girl on the head. "Ram must have touched a sore spot."
He knelt down, and stroked the dog's ears. "See? It can tell when a nice person pets— Agh! Not again!" The dog bit him the instant he touched her fur. It seemed some things were just set in stone.
Ram looked like she wanted to stay and complain to the dog's adult owners, but having seen Subaru suffer the same fate seemed to mollify her. Rem healed the wound as soon as she saw it, a gift she only reluctantly shared with Subaru.
She carried a massive barrel of foodstuff with her on their way back to the manor. Subaru offered to help, but she stiffly declined.
Subaru didn't press the issue, and they walked back in silence.
"Ah, Ram, Rem. Good, I don't need to search for you." Roswaal stepped up to them, wearing a normal set of clothes for a change. "I've received some troubling news, so I'm going to have to depaaart for the night. I'll return by tomorrow, though it might be late in the evening."
Subaru's mind reeled. What could have brought on this change— Oh, right, Julius started a city-wide manhunt for Elsa. That probably required the Court Mage's attention. He chuckled quietly. The butterfly effect was real.
Roswaal leaned down to talk to Subaru quietly. "I'll be counting on you as well, dear guest. I hope you'll look after Lady Emilia in my absence." He floated off the ground, and shot off through the air.
That was strange. And wait, he can fly? Why did no one mention that to me? Can I learn to do that?
That night, Subaru sat at his desk, writing what he knew, in an attempt to organise his thoughts.
"There was nothing wrong in the village, and I haven't noticed anything out of place in the manor. Plan Z is looking more and more tempting. I'd try and warn Puck, but he can't stay up after five."
He sighed. If he died again, he'd be right back in the capital. He idly sketched what he figured was the shape of the route from his return point to the district Reinhard had been in. He had it mostly down, but he'd need to check a map to be sure.
He scrunched up the paper. No, plan Z isn't accepting a loss. If it works, I won't even die, and I'll have saved Emilia properly, with my own actions.
He nodded to himself. "Maybe I could make an excuse to stay up. Say I want to try and catch a yin spirit, they're supposed to be more active at night."
He yawned. It was late, and he was suddenly bone-tired. He yawned again. His hand was shaking. He looked at it a bit curiously. What was—
He collapsed onto the floor, the chair toppling over.
His eyes widened. Roswaal's gone. Shit. Shit! They're attacking now!
He clambered to his feet, and stumbled to the door.
I need to check on Emilia.
He reached inside himself to feel his gate. He might need to cast a shamak to get to her. With Puck's training, he'd be able to control the amount of mana that got expelled, but he didn't have enough for more than a spell or two…
His mana. It was vanishing.
He could feel it behind his gate, slowly emptying from somewhere else inside him.
"Help." he croaked, leaning against the wall as he walked down the corridor. "Beatrice, Emilia, someone. Help me."
The drain became almost too much to bare, then lessened, as another source started pouring mana into his gate.
He looked up, and hovering above his head, was the little blue spirit he had been training with over the last few days. It started sharing feelings at him. Concern, unsettlement, danger.
"Emilia." He said. "We need to get to Emilia. Before the attackers get her."
It bobbed quickly, then began zipping back and forth through the hall, never straying far enough away to cut its temporary contract with Subaru.
The little spirit was doing its best, but it wasn't enough. Mana was leaving Subaru's body faster than it could replace it. If he could get to Emilia or Beatrice, they could probably save him, if they were still alright.
Alarm. Alarm! Alarm!
The minor spirit blared the feelings at him, and Subaru didn't think twice, falling to the floor. Not a second later, he heard the rattling of chains, and something heavy struck the wall where he had been standing.
"Witch cultist!" Someone shouted from behind him. He knew that voice.
Adrenaline rushed through his veins, giving him the strength to get to his feet.
Rem was standing there, her face a mask of wrath, a rod in her hands. No, not a rod. It was a handle, to the flail that she had just swung at Subaru. "After taking our home away, after all that you did to us, all you did to her… and now she…"
She whipped the chain back, and swung with all her might, the iron ball crashing through vases on its way to take Subaru's head off.
Danger! Shield!
The mana from the spirit cut off, and a small shield of ice materialised between the ball and its target. The solid iron went right through it, but its course deflected enough that it missed, hurtling past Subaru's head.
"Rem, what are you doing?" Subaru asked weakly, with growing horror. The drain was stronger, taking almost all he had left. "You don't understand, there's an attacker in the manor! We need to—"
"An attacker." Rem repeated, deathly silent. "An attacker who weaselled his way into our home, who caused such pain to sister. Huma."
A barrage of ice tore through Subaru's limbs, and he screamed in agony.
It hurts! It hurts! Why, Rem? Why!?
"You stink of the witch, even if no one else can smell it. Only witch cultists smell like that. I wanted to kill you the moment I saw you." She was standing over him, one foot crushing his chest painfully. Tears were filling Subaru's eyes, and he couldn't see properly. He was on his back. Why was he on his back? His feet weren't hurting. He couldn't feel them at all.
"I didn't, out of respect for lord Roswaal, and sister. It hurt so much, seeing sister being friendly with you, even though I knew she was only pretending to be nice!"
"Rah- ahm?" He gasped out.
"Don't say her name! Don't sully her name with your filthy tongue!"
His mouth hurt now too. He tasted blood. Was that a tooth? His mana was almost gone. Darkness rose at the edges of his vision.
"Die, witch cultist!"
He collapsed onto the ground. The other pedestrians avoided him. One or two came to offer him a hand, but backed off when the saw the expression on his face.
"Hah."
He looked up into the clear sky, the sun shining brightly, in stark contrast to the darkness he had just been through.
"Haha. Hahahaha!" He laughed madly.
"I wanted to kill you the moment I saw you."
He got to his feet slowly, his body responding properly, without a trace of pain. His legs began moving automatically.
I was an idiot. Rem had been looking at me strange all week.
Even back during his first stay at the manor, she had been glaring at him. Ram had tried to pass it off as her hating his hair, but now Subaru knew the truth.
"I wanted to kill you the moment I saw you."
How could an assassin sneak into the manor of the most powerful mage in Lugunica? It was impossible. How could someone poison that same mage? Also impossible.
And Ram, she was acting strangely too. She was always keeping an eye on me, through my butler duties or while I was studying.
"She was only pretending to be nice!"
"None of it was real, was it?" Subaru asked emptily. The stay at the manor, the sense of achievement as he got better at his tasks, even the occasional praise from Ram at his writing.
"I wanted to kill you."
Where was he walking? He recognised a few of those buildings. Oh. This is the direction Reinhard is in.
He had memorised the path in case he couldn't stop the attack, but…
There hadn't been an attack, had there? After all, he already knew of someone who wanted him dead.
"I wanted to kill you."
She killed him the first time as well. She had been wondering if he wanted his hair cut then. Perhaps she had been intending to slit his throat with the razor. When he declined, she had settled for allowing him to die to whatever caused the mana-draining. A poison, maybe? When had she snuck it into his food? Probably at dinner. She saw a chance, and took it.
"I wanted to kill you."
"I wanted to kill you."
"Kill you." "Kill you." "Kill you."
"Just because I've been marked by the witch?" He whispered to himself. "Puck said it was fine. He could tell I wasn't a threat. But she still attacked me."
She didn't care. She hadn't even listened to him.
He was almost there. Just a few more blocks. But what could he do?
"Hey everyone, the blue-haired maid you all trust a lot is planning to kill me." If I said that, who would they believe? Not me.
Emilia would believe him, but the same naivety that caused her to see the best in him would also blind her to Rem's intentions.
He could try to explain to the maid, that he wasn't a witch cultist, whatever that was. They seemed to have hurt Rem and Ram deeply though. Would they listen to him, or just kill him the instant he brought it up?
He spotted Reinhard up ahead. He seemed so pure, a white-cloaked hero who could solve any problem.
Subaru wanted to vomit, to put as much distance as possible between him and this perfect existence.
"Sir Sword Saint." someone called, in a steady, level voice.
Reinhard looked over at him, and Subaru realised it had been him who had spoken.
"Hello." Reinhard smiled. "You don't need to be so formal with me. Is something wrong? You look pale."
"I'm fine." What should he say? He couldn't let Emilia die. He owed a debt, didn't he? Or was that gone too, along with everything else?
"An assassin will appear in the slums at sunset." he said. "The bowel hunter. She's targeting a royal candidate."
"That is grave news. You were right to inform me. But, do you need assistance? You seem… unwell."
Subaru smiled. It was filled with grief, with despair, and with anger with his entire situation, but it approximated a smile regardless.
"I'm fine. Please hurry, hero."
The words tasted like ashes in his mouth.
He turned without waiting for a reply, and set out into the city.
To start again.
To start again for the fifth time, from less than zero.
End of Arc 1
AN: This chapter ended up being longer than I anticipated.
To clarify, Roswaal believed that Subaru's ability worked like in canon. He got the impression that Subaru used his redo to get the loot house exactly right, with two knights there to save them. From there, he believed Subaru was finished up figuring out the mabeast threat, and taking some extra time to study, so he acted accordingly, leaving the manor to him.
From here on out, I'm going to try and stick to an irregular weekly schedule. We'll see if I'm able to keep up, if not, I'll adjust it.