Tokoyami stood numbly in the middle of the street, oblivious to passing time or the swarms of angered Curious fans and warriors crying out in despair. He found the whole scene difficult to process. Not because he wasn't used to seeing bloodshed, but because he was only left to wonder if there could've been a way to avoid all this. Seeing the outcome now, it felt far too pointless.
Was this his failure?
His chance to escape?
Or had he resolved to the idea that not everyone could be saved, no matter how much someone wanted to be a hero. Or whatever the hell he was at this point. And maybe, just maybe, as he gazed down at the journalist's broken body, blood pooling from her blue skin as the cold ground drained the last of her fleeting warmth, he asked himself if not everyone deserved to be saved, either.
But that's not fair.
Heroes are never supposed to kill.
Their deaths weren't caused by us, though. It's just that we weren't meant to prevent them, either.
When the shock of what all had transpired in front of him finally began to fade, he found that the Meta Liberation Army soldiers were simmering with hurt and rage. And that the only thing he could do in this situation now was run for his life like a dog with its tail between its legs. There was no place for him here. If anything, sticking around any longer would only result in more people getting hurt. By him. It didn't matter if he'd be defending himself from people with sinister intent – this had been his interview, and they rightfully view him as the enemy.
Tokoyami backpedaled away from the blood-drenched scene, slowly at first. Then he was running, fleeing from any responsibility he might've held in this wretched display.
What did that lady know anyway?
She called me a traitor.
A manifestation of darkness.
Brainwashed by villains.
Tokoyami reflexively wiped his hand over his eyes, and it came away damp with unshed tears. His feet took him away from the mayhem, out of sight from judgement. He didn't care where, or what he was supposed to do afterwards, until he came to a stop inside an alleyway, beyond the mess he'd left behind. He tried to lean against the wall, only to flinch away from the pain that such a simple motion had caused. He could still feel flecks of glass and rubble buried into his skin, and his arms were scarred and blistered from the explosions. His whole body ached. He desperately wanted to curl up somewhere and wait for this whole thing to pass. This was the League's problem, not his.
We were called here too, though. She was ready for us.
Tokoyami's shoulders slumped heavily. "Was this punishment for making it this far?" he mumbled.
But thinking about all that had just happened, all the heavy accusations and raw memories that had bubbled to the surface because of Curious's ranting, he reached a grim but determined conclusion.
He was still standing. She was already gone, and that was the end of it. If he stopped now, sat down and gave in to her angered followers or hid himself away, then there would be no getting back up. Even though everything hurt, there wasn't anything major enough to truly impede his movement.
"I'll keep going," Tokoyami said resolutely. "Even if there's nowhere for me to go, I'll keep going."
…Okay, that's great, but where?
Tokoyami's eyes trailed over the ground. It wasn't hard to notice the distinct red splatters that decorated the ground, a visible path left behind by the last person to stumble through here. He'd only hesitated in the streets for a few moments, but she'd been actively fleeing at the first chance, not even looking back at the damage she'd done with a power – an identity – that wasn't even hers.
He followed after it.
She… Toga had been such a mess. He knew all too well what kind of combat she was suited to, and that wasn't it. He'd never seen her get beaten up like this, and he felt… scared for her?
No. That wasn't it. Truthfully, he didn't know how to feel quite yet.
Do you think she could've gotten away before it had gone so wrong?
"She's usually good at that," Tokoyami panted, following the trail of blood through increasingly narrow spaces. "But… that wasn't a normal situation." I think I ended up learning more about her then I'd ever wanted to.
Dark Shadow squirmed at that. Emotions of shame and embarrassment welled to the surface, emanating from his quirk until Tokoyami felt the same things weighing him down equally. She learned a lot about us as well, though. That was… too personal.
Tokoyami felt heat rise to his cheeks under his ruffled feathers. I want to be madder at that Curious for exposing us like that –
– And for weaving lies into it to make us look bad! –
– But that's the thing. I don't think any of that was exactly wr…
The alley came to an end, splitting off in either direction alongside a high concrete fence. A nearby gate was swinging slowly on its hinges, blood smeared onto its lock. Tokoyami peeked his head into what was clearly someone's back yard, reminding him that people did, in fact, live in this city under siege. These unsuspecting neighborhoods were serving a new purpose as a base for this legion of megalomaniacs.
Tokoyami shook his head, forcing himself to focus. He didn't want to dwell on the broad, sprawling manner of this situation. He didn't want to think about the leaders orchestrating this event, or the thousands of everyday people that were backing them. Because if he dwelled too much on that, then he'd end up faltering. He couldn't afford to do that right now. No, not while he could see the end of the trail right in front of him. He didn't know how far she'd make it, but the end was a considerable distance away from the turmoil they'd left behind. Even in the state she was in, hiding in the most unassuming places was what she was good at. Not that it had done much good now.
The blood splatters, fresh and glistening in the daylight, led directly to a small utility shack nestled in the back of the barren little yard. Tokoyami approached the small structure cautiously.
"Toga…?" he called out uncertainly.
He expected a response – a cheery greeting or a call for help or anything, really. She was usually one to talk anyway, even in situations where she might be better off keeping quiet. But when he listened, there was none of that. The sliding door to the shed had been mostly closed, messy red fingerprints giving away her poor attempts at concealment. And beyond that, all he could hear was her breathing – forced and muffled, like every intake of air was a struggle.
Tokoyami opened the door.
"Toga!"
He knew she'd be in bad shape, had seen exactly what condition she'd last been in. And yet, without the dangers of oncoming attacks or a need to run away, he could finally see clear as day just how bad it had turned out to be by the end of the near life-ending encounter.
Toga was curled up in the fetal position on the floor of the shed. By now, her quirk had worn off – much to his relief – replacing his classmate's stolen identity with Toga's typical self. Only it wasn't typical, because she was hanging on the edge of death.
Tokoyami knelt down next to her. Blood oozed from the scathing burns and scars on her body, covering her entire face with a red mask. It poured even more freely from her nose, mouth, and ears, and he had to wonder at just how much internal damage had been caused by the string of internal explosions that had wracked her body. Everything after that initial moment of damage was just further insult to injury that sought to bring her down into an early grave. Judging by the splatters beside her head, she must've been coughing up blood mere moments before his arrival.
Dark Shadow emerged next to him, unannounced.
"What happened!" he wailed tearfully. "We were trying to protect her, right? So why'd she end up like this!"
"This isn't on us!" Tokoyami snapped, maybe a little too harshly. "We just got caught up in her trouble! It could be plenty worse." He didn't have the heart to believe those words, though. Crouched next to her listless body, his hands trembled uncertainly.
Is this what it was like for Toga when she and Twice had come across his battle-ravaged body following Overhaul's defeat?
"They took us to a hospital…"
"They took us back underneath them! I nearly died!" Tokoyami argued. Which seemed like a strange thing to do while someone was bleeding out beneath him.
"We need help!"
Tokoyami's bottom beak quivered. If he knew how to calm down, he would. But in the moment, everything felt too fast to comprehend, and every second ticked down to her oncoming demise. "S-sorry if this hurts!"
Tokoyami did his best to bundle her up in his arms. It was the best he could do, really. He was reminded of training sessions at UA where they'd be mock saving people, and he'd have Dark Shadow carry the victim dummies so that his own arms would be open. That wasn't to be the case here. No, his quirk wasn't big enough to hold her, even if he had noticed the growth in size and ability that had developed during the exchange with Curious. Furthermore, if an enemy approached them, he would need Dark Shadow to fend them off.
His arms burned at the contact and his muscles ached at the exertion. It had to have been worse for Toga, but she didn't make a sound, not even a whimper, and that concerned him. Even though they were almost the exact same height – a fact that had only ever bothered him in his entire time under the League – right now she felt pathetically small in his arms. Her clothes, frayed and tattered, felt like it was the bulk of what he was carrying. Her head slumped inwards, hiding her blood covered face, and the red stains on her new coat continued to grow until he could feel them seeping through.
"This is bad, Fumikage!"
Now that he had her bundled in his arms, his head was struggling to think of what to do next. Would every step he took hurt her? He couldn't just leave her here – those meta fanatics could trace her trail right here at any moment in much the same way as he had. If he left, that'd seal her fate for sure. Find someone? But nobody here was a damn healer! So much for Shigaraki wanting a balanced party, or whatever the hell he talked about. Maybe there was a civilian out there with a quirk that could heal, but they'd never help somebody like him.
"Why not? What kind of person are you?"
A vil—"A target!" Tokoyami choked out. "The only people here who are going to help me is the League!" And that's… that's sad, isn't it?
Tokoyami stood up, freeing Toga from the small space of the utility shed. Her array of syringes clinked together, and the sliced tubes of her device dangled from his arms. She left behind a considerable amount of blood that stained the ground, and he couldn't help staring at just how much had accumulated there in the short time that she'd been lying there.
Blood. He thought about her quirk. How she'd… used Uraraka's quirk. Could she always do that? Could she…
His heart was pounding in his chest so hard that he was certain Toga could feel it, even in spite of her condition. His arms were heavy, and he knew that setting her down would do little to change that. Not that it was even an option at this point.
I need to… to do something. Literally anything so that she's not like this. Tokoyami began to move, slowly at first, each step labored to the point of being almost painful. If she's in pain, I need to make it stop. She'd… technically do the same for me, right?
Tokoyami reached the gate with her in his arms and looked down at her again, just to reaffirm that her shallow breaths were still present. And for some reason, swimming in thoughts on what the hell he was supposed to be doing, he found himself hesitating on the gate threshold.
Hide somewhere. Find someone. A medic. A hero. The League. A way out. Revenge, but there's none to be had.
You could kill her.
A thought that didn't feel like his own.
A beat of stunned silence.
"What?" Dark Shadow whispered hoarsely, eyes wide with horror.
Tokoyami looked up blankly at his quirk. "What was that?"
"Fumikage, what'd you just say?"
His feathers prickled uneasily. "I didn't say anything."
"Why would you suggest killing her? Why would you think that?!" Dark Shadow rasped, tears coming to his glowing amber eyes. "I thought she was our friend! O-or the closest thing we have to a friend in all this!"
Panic rose in his chest, and his hold of Toga tightened. "N-no, that wasn't me! I would never—"
Toga let out the smallest of sounds, and Tokoyami realized just how strong his grip of her had become. He loosened it with a gasp. "I'm sorry!"
Dark Shadow coiled and squirmed over his head, behaving a bit too much like a panicked bird connected to him by a painfully thin leash. "What if we lose her? I don't wanna say goodbye yet!"
She's a villain.
Tokoyami shouted down his own thoughts. At the same time, his feet began to move again, quickly picking up the pace. "No! I mean yes, but no! I don't care anymore! I know she's done bad things, but so have I! But I can't let this be another one of my failures!"
Dark Shadow was beginning to sob, which felt uncharacteristic until he was reminded of just how emotional his quirk could be. It's just been so long. But this moment right here was bringing a lot out of both of them, especially following the turmoil of that damned interview that had had the audacity of calling him out like that.
He hated this and everything about it. Hated that he'd stuck his neck out for her. And vice versa. Hated the feeling that they were alike in any way, at least according to the journalist. But that wretched interview hadn't even done her any good in the end, either, considering that Curious was now a corpse.
"Why'd you have to act so reckless?!" Tokoyami demanded, directing his frustrations to the comatose Toga. No response. "If you'd just ran away from her, I would've covered for you, but instead you went after her! What did you think was going to happen, Toga?!" He wondered if there was anything different he could've done in that situation to have changed the outcome. To prevent people from dying, from his integrity from getting attacked, from Toga getting hurt.
Does she deserve this?
"No!" Tokoyami yelled, his throat raw and emotions unhinged. He was running now, desperately trying to find help of any kind. "You're not dying! I won't let it happen!" And, taking a deep breath, he cried out for the one person who he felt he needed.
"Twice! Twice, where are you?!" Tokoyami screeched, racing through the narrow streets in what he hoped was the right direction. "I – Toga – we need your help. Twiiiiiice…!"
He could very well be placing a bigger target on his shoulders by yelling like this, but he didn't care. Dark Shadow chimed in with him, calling out for Twice. He just thought… that if anyone could help her, it'd be him. He was basically the most adult one in the group, right? More or less. And Tokoyami knew he cared about his team mates, maybe a bit too much, but that wasn't a bad thing.
Whatever the case, their cries of desperation must've reached him.
Tokoyami raced past the opening of another alley, only for a familiar voice to bring him screeching to a stop. He fought hard with himself not to drop Toga on the spot, hanging on with only the adrenaline rushing through him keeping himself on his feet.
"Tokoyami? What's wrong? What'd you do!" Twice was standing on the other end of the alley, paused for a moment before breaking into a run to meet with him.
A spark of guilt jolted through Tokoyami. He could hear the accusatory tone in his voice, and even knowing that it was part of his split personality to be abrasive at times, it still hurt. Like it was his fault after all that this had happened in the first place.
Twice was by his side in an instant, and Tokoyami held out Toga's body as best he could without dropping her for him to see. "I-it was one of those Army leaders, the blue-skinned lady. She wanted to interview – to kill us! A-and we were surrounded and they kept attacking. I didn't want anyone to get hurt, I swear! Least of all her, but…!" Tokoyami stammered out his faulty explanation, but it felt lost to the expression of utter horror on Twice's face, thinly concealed by his mask.
"You… you have Toga. And she's…" Words came to Twice in broken chunks, like he was struggling to process what was laid out before him. Tokoyami crouched on the ground with Toga to give his arms a rest, and Twice crumpled to his knees next to him, a man that was losing something dear to him right before his eyes.
Twice was breathing hard, and Tokoyami could tell that he must've been running around for a while trying to find them. Honestly, it was amazing that they hadn't attracted any unwanted attention.
"When you two disappeared, I was… freaking out. Totally calm. I didn't know if you two were together or-or if you'd gotten separated from everyone else. It wasn't that long ago, how could it have gone so bad!" Twice sniffled loudly, gently accepting Toga from Tokoyami and laying her down on the ground with her head tilted up.
Tokoyami looked away sullenly, thinking about the thoughts that had bombarded him when he'd first found her in this state. "I… I'm sorry," he mumbled.
Twice looked up at him. "Oh no no no, you're hurt too! You of all people shouldn't be hurting like this, either! Not after everything you've been dragged through!"
Tokoyami stayed quiet, not sure what to say or do now that Toga was in the hands of someone who rightfully cared more than he did, as much as it mad his chest ache to realize this.
"Ahhhhh, this can't be happening! It's just like last time, I thought you were gonna die if we didn't get you outta there, and there was so much blood and you weren't moving and now the same thing is happening with Toga but no van is coming to pick us up to take you to a doctor! The only doctor we have is that creep and where's the fucking fairness in that and – " Twice just kept going off, rambling his worst fears while tears stained the inside of his mask. Tokoyami was made grimly aware that he'd never seen Twice so vividly upset. At least not to his memory, but it sure as hell sounded like something similar had happened when Tokoyami had ended up in a compromised state like this in the past.
"—Do you have any band-aids?" Twice sniffled, like that was the one thing that could help most in this situation.
"I-I, uh, yes!" Tokoyami stammered, surprised by the switch in focus to something more helpful than morning a tragedy that hadn't been set in stone just yet. He reached into the pouches strapped to his side, desperately pulling out all the medicinal supplies that Dabi had wanted him to start packing on outings. Rolls of gauze and bandages spilled out, followed by miscellaneous painkillers and antiseptics.
Twice looked over the contents like he was at a loss. "That's… that's not enough!" His head raised up sharply, locking eyes with Tokoyami. "Go find Compress! He has a med kit stored in one of his marbles! Ahhh, Toga, how are we gonna fix you? She'll bleed out any moment! No, shaddup, she's gonna pull through just fine!" He ran his hands over his mask, crinkling the spandex like he was trying to pull his hair from his scalp.
Tokoyami pushed himself up to his feet, wavering in spite of his desire to stand firm. "Are you sure it's alright to leave you here?"
Twice smacked his own head, making Tokoyami jump. "Dammit! You're still hurt! You shouldn't be running out there where it's dangerous! If you stay here you're a sitting duck. I don't want you to push yourself! Not after you already came this far to protect Toga! Let's give it up, the girl's already dead.
Maybe finding Twice was a mistake after all.
No no no, please! He's the best we have!
Dark Shadow, I shouldn't have to tell you how bad that is.
But look how much he cares, the quirk whimpered.
With one hand supporting Toga's head, Twice reached his other one out to Tokoyami and grabbed onto his wrist with a gentleness that he wouldn't have expected from someone in such a manic state. "Tokoyami, I'm going to protect Toga here. You can't carry her any further, right? I know I'm asking a lot, a-and I get it if you don't like us – really I do! What's not to love? – but it would mean a lot if you could bring Compress here. After that, you can do whatever you want! Or don't! Run away from this whole messed-up city for all I care!" As jumbled as his messages were, Tokoyami understood him load and clear. It felt weird, helping him like this, but he couldn't imagine doing anything else in this situation.
Tokoyami clasped Twice's hand. "I'll be back, I promise. You two hang tight here. I…" His hand tightened. "I don't want to see Toga die either." And Twice must've heard the truth in his voice, because his anxious expression relaxed to one of overwhelming relief at his declaration. The masked man let go of him and turned his attention back to Toga.
"Be safe out there," Twice murmured. Tokoyami watched him fish a handkerchief out of his suit, and it took Tokoyami a moment to register that it was the same one that Twice had been wearing over part of his head during the height of the Overhaul battle.
Tokoyami gave a firm nod of resolution, though it didn't seem like Twice had much attention to spare him anymore. His voice turned quieter the further away he got, so that Tokoyami had to strain to hear. "No, no, no, you gotta live! You… gave the whole League… you gave me a place to belong! A washed-up outcast like me… you were the only one… who made me feel needed! Dammit!" And then he was racing through the city streets again, on the lookout for wherever the rest of the League was. He only hoped that this was the right decision.
Once his two companions were out of sight, though, he realized that he didn't exactly know what direction he was supposed to be headed in. "Find Compress" would be easier if he didn't have to navigate a whole city of unfamiliar terrain. Twice said they'd all been separated, so how was he supposed to…?
His question was answered all too quickly by a spire of ice that erupted towards the sky. Todoroki? He thought briefly, remembering his classmate's grand display at the Sports Festival. But that didn't sound right. And then he watched as the ice was met by an enormous conflagration of blue flames that lit up the sky, melting rooves and scorching concrete. Even from a distance, he could feel the changes in starkly contrasting temperatures.
"I guess that's where we're going."
Tokoyami raced off towards the battlefield unfolding several blocks away, his feet pounding against the concrete. He had a new goal, and if it brought him back into the heat of battle, then so be it. It's nothing he shouldn't be used to.
But you still have to be careful, or else I can't protect you, Dark Shadow warned. This was starting to feel all too familiar, like they'd been over this one too many times.
I know, Tokoyami solemnly agreed, hoping that this time around he could stand by that and not let his quirk down.
As fire licked the air, he pushed forward as fast as he could, passing streets and yards while taking note of where he'd need to return to. Maybe if he hadn't had his eyes set forward to the blazing flames so intently he could've noticed the dark shapes moving in the shadows, slipping past him to reach the people that he'd just left behind.