In the Darklands, the Koopas liked to classify themselves based on their various characteristics. Some had wings, some were strong enough to throw heavy objects like hammers, some had sharp spines on their shells. They were the things that made them unique, the things that made them a valuable asset to their kingdom.
Bowser, like all other Koopa kings and queens before him, came from a lineage known as Dragon Koopas. As the name implied, Dragon Koopas were the strongest of the strong, the toughest of the tough, and one would be remiss to forget the fact that they could literally breathe fire. Unsurprisingly, these were the traits that Bowser liked most about himself.
To be king over a race of such shell-headed morons required a certain… resilience. Kamek had ingrained that notion in him from a very young age. There would not– could not– be any sign of weakness, not if a Koopa King wanted to keep his head attached to his shoulders. Fortunately, that seemed to be an easy concept for Bowser to grasp. Every aspect, from politics to combat to etiquette, was drilled into him like a Monty Mole into soil (though, admittedly, his etiquette was not quite up to snuff, but Kamek was satisfied enough). Each waking moment of his princehood was dedicated to becoming a king who was impossible to defy, a king who was impossible to dethrone.
And it all led up to this moment. The beginning of the worldwide conquest that he and Kamek had always dreamed of. All he needed to do was grasp it with his clawed fist and refuse to let go.
Bowser could hardly keep the sadistic anticipation out of his smile as his Clown Copter soared through the pitch black night sky. His foot army was barely visible below him, rows upon rows of Koopas in heavy metal armor that glinted in the faint starlight as they marched in perfect sync. They were a force to be reckoned with, and the king couldn't wait to unleash his full might upon the unsuspecting Mushroom Kingdom.
Was it wrong to find thrill in the conquest? To look forward to the pathetic cries and shrill screams of the Toads? To feel the rush of invincibility when victory was his? This was all for the betterment of his kingdom, afterall; becoming the most legendary Koopa King in the Darklands' history was just a bonus.
"No one will stop me. No one can stop me," Bowser murmured to himself. The cool night's air blew through his cropped red hair and he took a deep inhale of the smoke-free atmosphere. It was strange, but not entirely unpleasant.
The skies ahead were mostly clear, and Bowser calculated that he'd reach the Mushroom Kingdom shortly before the rest of his army. Of course, a few of his Magikoopas should already be in place, ready to start casting his dark spell the moment he eliminated the Princess Toadstool and gave them the order to proceed. But this is where the king should be, at the front of the lines, for the glory and honor of the Darklands!
All too soon, the hazy outline of the Mushroom Kingdom's castle faded into view along the horizon, highlighted by the first balmy rays of dawn. Bowser's grin grew, like a Spiny Cheep-Cheep who had spotted his prey.
"It's showtime."
The first moments of the invasion made it clear there was only going to be chaos. Descending like a storm, Bowser led his army through the Mushroom Kingdom's border with zero resistance. His shadow barely passed over the Toads, many of whom were just waking from slumber, and sent them scrambling for cover. Those who carried baskets or bags dropped them, scattering their contents and leaving them abandoned, while the hundreds of pairs of pounding, stubby feet created a base rhythm to accompany their shrieks.
"Gwahahaha!" Bowser's deep, booming laugh rang out over the town. Those power-ups were as good as his!
The king wanted to stay and watch his army finish the job, but he had a specific target, and there was no time to waste. That didn't stop him from spitting an occasional fireball as he went, though. Steering his Clown Copter higher, he scaled the steep, winding mountainside until he was at the castle. Its bright, whitewashed bricks and reddish-pink tower roofs were frankly an eyesore that Bowser was glad to have a hand in destroying.
He quickly located the easiest and weakest entry point, which ended up being a large, round stained glass window. Based on its position in the exact front and center of the castle, he guessed it shed light right into the Princess's throne room. Without another moment's hesitation, he conjured a mighty fireball and hurled it right at the colorful masterpiece. It shattered instantly upon impact, and the shrapnel that blew was swiftly half-melted by the heat. Bowser's new entryway dripped with red-glowing lava as he descended into the castle, and the rising sun cast him as an ominous dark silhouette. For good measure, the Koopa King unleashed a ferocious roar that rattled the delicate crystal chandeliers hanging from the throne room's ceiling. There was a chorus of screams in reply, much to his satisfaction.
His heart pounded with exhilaration, sending fire coursing through his veins. At the same time, his eyes darted around the throne room as a hundred things happened at once. There were about two dozen Toads gathered, some in more official attire, but most in the blue and yellow uniforms of the royal guard. Bowser quickly disregarded them, even as the dignitaries flew out of the room and the guards took a defensive position. He landed his Clown Copter and hopped out over the side, at the same time looking past all the guards and straight to the throne, which was a bit taller than he'd envisioned. But then came the real surprise.
"Careful, Princess!" a Toad with red spots and a blue vest exclaimed. He was standing next to a short, pudgy man with a bulbous nose and red cap. Bowser was a bit surprised to see a human, but he was only there to dispatch the so-called Princess Toadstool. However, both the Toad and the man stood protectively in front of a figure that no amount of intel could have prepared him for.
Time stood still as his breath caught in his throat, and a jolt of some unfamiliar feeling struck him deep in his chest. He couldn't stop his blood-red eyes from widening as they locked onto a pair of equally wide blue ones.
The Princess wasn't an ugly little Toad, after all.
She was unlike anything he'd ever seen. She stood tall– probably came to Bowser's shoulder if he hunched– and she carried herself with a strength that was somehow both delicate and defiant. Her gentle curves were draped in pale, pink silk, and her jeweled accessories matched her striking sapphire eyes. They were set in skin that looked clear and smooth as porcelain, and framed by soft locks of long, silky hair. Finally, her golden crown sat upon her golden head, sparkling in the dawn, leaving no doubt as to her position. This was Princess Toadstool, and King Koopa was unable to look away.
Oh.
In that instant he forgot his purpose. All he could do was stare, and her gaze in turn froze him in place. He would lose himself in those jewel-like pools if he looked for too long.
But the princess broke the spell first.
"Mario, Toad, heads up!" she cried, making a dash behind her throne. She hopped into the air above it with her fist raised, and bumped an invisible block.
Clever girl, Bowser thought as a handful of power-ups came bursting forth. His eyes lit up with interest when a multi-colored Power Star was among them. He'd definitely be taking that. Before any of them could reach a power-up, Bowser spat a quick fireball. It instantly disintegrated the magical items, apart from the invincible Power Star, which was sent flying across the room by the impact.
The princess yelped in alarm as she jumped back to avoid being burned. Bowser used the momentary diversion to plow through the royal guards like they were nothing more than weeds, then made his approach.
No distractions! Complete your mission and fulfill your destiny! This conquest is too important!
"I've come for you, mage," he announced out loud, letting the final word drip with rueful disdain. She was still the white-magic wielder, even if Bowser had been taken aback by her appearance.
The princess blanched, taking a cautious step away. She shook her head and murmured "Impossible," as her eyes filled with panic.
"You're not gonna touch her, you– you big, ugly turtle thing!" the pudgy human declared, stepping in front of her with a steel in his eyes.
"Yeah!" the Toad agreed.
Bowser threw his head back and laughed at the audacity of this mere, sniveling human. "And who are you supposed to be? A peasant trying to play hero?"
"Name's Mario, and I'm not here to play," the human– Mario– spat. He rolled up his sleeves and shot Bowser a glare so fierce it was almost intimidating. "I'm not gonna let you hurt these innocent people!"
"Wow. You're either stupid, or you're really, really stupid," Bowser commented. Then, without any warning, he lunged forward, swiping at Mario with a massive, clawed hand. The human was surprisingly agile, however, and dodged to the side, narrowly avoiding the blow. Bowser snorted a puff of angry black smoke and went for a tail swipe to continue his momentum. Again, he leapt out of harm's way, and Bowser ground his teeth.
"I've stood up to big bullies like you before!" Mario declared. "You're nothing but a coward for picking on someone smaller and weaker than you, and I'm not afraid of you!"
The Koopa King's eyes flashed with wrath. "Then you'll die braver than most," he snarled.
He rapidly closed the distance between them, unleashing a flurry of attacks with a renewed ferocity. Kicks. Punches. He even tried to bite. The pudgy little man kept dodging them by just the tiniest, most infuriating margin.
Finally, finally, one of Bowser's round-house punches landed squarely, sending the man sprawling across the floor. After the initial shock, Mario tried to get to his feet, but only succeeded in pushing himself halfway up with shaky arms before he collapsed again.
Bowser scoffed. "You're a bit of a nuisance, I'll admit," he grunted. "But nothing more than an insignificant insect. So make like a bug and get squashed!"
The king raised a massive foot to stomp the life out of him, but halted when he saw a flash of pink from the corner of his vision. He whipped his head around just in time to see Princess Toadstool vanish around a corner.
"NO!" Bowser roared, furious at being duped.
Mario rolled out of harm's way and quickly shook himself. He leapt right in Bowser's path with a defiant scowl.
"I told you, I'm not here to play," he stated. "You have my brother, and I won't rest until he's safe!"
Bowser inhaled, a blaze of heat rushing up the back of his throat. "Agreed. Playtime is over!"
Bowser unleashed a stream of some of his hottest fire, sending Mario scrambling for shelter. Using the flames as a cover, Bowser didn't hesitate a second. He tucked himself into his shell and spun himself towards the unsuspecting man like a torpedo. The pathetic human didn't stand a chance.
The impact was concussive. The man's eyes popped open in utter shock as he was launched backwards with the force of a cannonball. He flew right into the princess's empty throne, knocking it over with a thunderous crash and landing on the floor once more. Except this time, he didn't get up, or even attempt to.
Bowser didn't bother to check and see if he was dead or just out cold, because he was already charging after his escaped target with long, determined strides. He knew he could catch up quickly, because–
SMACK!
Right as Bowser turned a corner, a sharp pain shot up his shin. He howled and glared down to see the Toad from earlier with a frying pan in his grip, the cause of his injury.
"WHY YOU LITTLE–"
King Koopa thrust the Toad away with a furious swat. He went flying and crashed into the opposite wall with a squeak. He was probably only stunned, but again Bowser refused to stop and continued after the princess.
Keep it together, shell-head! Just finish the job and collect those power-ups!
As he stormed through the bright, stained glass halls (with only a slight limp), Bowser's thoughts raced. Nothing about his mission had changed… but it sorta had. He couldn't quite place his claw on the feeling until he rounded a corner, came to a grand dining hall, and was once again face-to-face with Princess Toadstool.
"Stay back!" she warned. She stood at the opposite end of the room, arm outstretched as though she were halting traffic. "O-Or I will have no choice but to use my magic against you!"
Bowser came to a stop, but not really because of her threat. The moment he laid eyes upon her again, saw the stubborn determination masking the fear in that beautiful face, he realized he couldn't complete his mission. He knew he couldn't destroy her.
Because there is another trait that is common to all Dragon Koopas: Raw, insatiable greed.
"Is that so, Princess?" Bowser asked her, a heavy dose of snark in his tone. "I had anticipated you using your magic, but I figured it would have happened sooner. After all, if you wanted, you could have stopped me from pounding that fat little human back there instead of running away."
She blinked a few times, taken aback by his blunt observation. "Y-You, I–"
Bowser took a step forward, making her jump. "You know what I think? I think you don't actually know how to control it. In fact, I think right now you're bluffing."
When he took another step closer, Princess Toadstool threw up her other hand. "Mario volunteered to be a distraction! A-and I led you here on purpose, away from my Toads! So now that there's no one who could get hurt, I won't hesitate to use my magic right now– unless you surrender!"
Her efforts to intimidate him were adorable— pathetic and pointless, of course— but still adorable. He saw right through her the moment that peasant stepped forward instead of her in the throne room; she had no idea what kind of power she possessed, not really. She had undone his spell before, but did she truly even understand how? If she had, he would be having to fight a much harder battle right now.
"I'm afraid surrender isn't an option," Bowser decreed, his voice low and menacing.
Toadstool's bravado faltered, and her eyes darted around as she looked for an alternate escape route. Bowser seized the moment that her hesitation granted him and charged forward before she could flee. He grabbed her slender wrists, refusing to let go even as she struggled and screamed.
"Let me go!" she cried, straining against him with the ferocity of a Chain Chomp.
"I'm not gonna hurt you," Bowser told her, surprised at himself that the words were actually true.
What was he supposed to do, then? She was the reason he was here at the castle instead of burning the village to the ground with the others. And it wasn't like he could just let her go, not with the power she possessed (even if it was mostly dormant at the moment). The bottom line was that he simply couldn't leave until the threat to his spell was neutralized, but that strange, indecisive feeling still tugged at him whenever he looked at her.
So really, there was only one other option.
"You'll be coming with me," Bowser declared in a split-second decision. The princess squealed in surprise as he slung her over one of his bulky shoulders.
"No! Stop it! Put me down!" she demanded, kicking and clawing at him.
The Koopa King ignored her and made his way back to the throne room with his new captive. After scooping up the Power Star with a slick flick of his wrist, he strutted to his Clown Copter with an arrogant swagger in his step. Reaching it, he stepped over the unconscious bodies of his victims, hopped in with both his prizes in his grasp, and gleefully started his reascent as he'd previously left the engine running.
"Let me go you brute! You monster!" the princess continued, pounding on his shell with her small fists. "Someone please help!"
Bowser shoved the Power Star into a compartment so the princess couldn't access it, then plopped her down so he could pilot the copter back to the Darklands. Just before they could reach the broken window and make their escape, however, Bowser felt the copter tilt violently to one side. The king grunted and looked over the edge to see, much to his disgust, that the ugly peasant human was back, clinging to the side and attempting to climb in.
"I will-a save you, Princess!" he declared as he struggled to scale the side of the copter. He was already looking to be in pretty poor shape from Bowser's previous attack, with his ragged, singed clothing and a few faint bruises starting to show, yet still he persisted.
"GRAH! You just don't know when to quit!" Bowser seethed, taking his free hand off the copter controls and using it to swipe at Mario. The human avoided it, though just barely as Bowser's claws grazed his overalls and snapped one strap clean through.
"Mario!" Princess Toadstool exclaimed, reaching for him. "Be careful!"
Her worry for the peasant made Bowser bristle with irritation. He blocked her from reaching Mario with a beefy forearm, then used a foot to try and kick the man back to the ground. The Clown Copter was left hovering precariously with no pilot, and the sudden motion of Bowser trying to stop two people at once made it rock like a ship in a treacherous sea.
The princess screamed and held on for dear life. Bowser almost went over the side himself, had it not been for him digging his claws into the rim. Mario was not so lucky, however, and fell off the copter like a deadweight. He landed flat on his back, knocking the air and the fight out of him.
"And stay dead you little piece of scum!" Bowser raged. He took control of the Clown Copter, forced Toadstool to have a seat, then steered them towards their exit. At the last second he paused and unleashed all his remaining fire, completely engulfing the throne room and trapping those inside.
"NO!" the princess screamed as she covered her mouth in horror.
The flames and smoke chased them out as Bowser finally exited the castle through the broken window. Soaring back into the brightening sky, the view before them was much the same. Half-demolished houses, burnt rooftops, and– most importantly– every Toad was either a stone statue, or being chased by a Magikoopa on a broom who was about to turn him into one.
"It worked!" Bowser exclaimed, slapping a hand on the copter's dashboard ecstatically. "Gwahahaha! My empire is as good as guaranteed!"
A soft whimper drew his attention. He glanced down to where the princess was overlooking the scene as well, but instead with tears forming in the corners of her eyes and her chin quivering as she held them back.
Bowser smirked. "I wouldn't waste your tears on them, princess. I've still got six worlds to go, and this was the tamest campaign I have planned."
"Why?" she sniffled, turning her glassy blue gaze up to him. "Why?"
"Why not? With your kingdom under my control, and your power-ups in my arsenal, the Darklands will be the most feared kingdom in the entire history of the Eight Worlds!" he guffawed.
"You're horrible!" she retorted, cheeks burning red. "We've done nothing to you!"
Bowser eyed her up and down. "Not sure what part of 'campaign' you don't understand, sweetheart, but this ain't a personal vendetta against the Mushroom Kingdom or something. Although I guess you could say I find your Toads particularly annoying."
"Whatever you have planned," she continued, voice trembling, "you won't get away with it! The other kingdoms will not sit idly by!"
"Funny enough, but I think if you'll look back over at your burning kingdom, you might say I already have."
The princess stifled a sob and turned away, hugging herself. Bowser felt a twinge of some uncomfortable, unfamiliar emotion prickle the back of his neck. Shrugging it off, he returned his attention back to flying. Nothing would ruin his victory here today.
The sun continued to rise, and the scenery continued to change as Bowser took the shortest route back to his castle. Kidnapping the princess hadn't originally been in his plans, obviously, so he was anxious to return home, regain control over the situation, and figure out what he was actually supposed to do with her; now that the moment of impulse had passed, he wasn't sure how he could logically explain why he had taken the princess in the first place.
That, and the fact that his Clown Copter was a one-person vehicle, leaving little space for an additional (and unwilling) passenger.
The princess had wedged herself as far away from him as possible, hugging the wall and keeping one wary eye on him after her quiet sobs had eventually died down. Even so, her lacy dress and hair kept tickling his legs everytime she shifted. Occasionally, she peeked over the side of the copter to get a view of the landscape. Bowser figured she wasn't stupid enough to try and jump, but he still kept an eye on her in turn.
He also watched her long, golden locks flutter in the breeze and dance in the sunlight. He wasn't used to seeing such lengthy hair before, not since Koopas tended to keep theirs short to avoid getting it tangled in their shells– many even chose to go bald. So to see hers so free and playful was almost mesmerizing.
All things considered, she hadn't been making too big of a fuss. She was undoubtedly keeping her emotions in check in order to put up a brave face in front of him, or maybe she just knew it was better not to annoy her captor. Either way, it left the two passengers in a quietness that Bowser felt was beginning to get awkward.
"Sooo, you got a name?" Bowser asked, breaking the silence.
The princess jumped and only blinked at him in silence with those wide, sapphire eyes.
"Well?" he pressed with a sharp tone.
"I-It's P-Peach," she stammered quietly, so quietly that Bowser had to strain to hear her.
"What's that? Peaches?"
"N-No, i-it's," she paused, took a deep breath, and closed her eyes. When she opened them, they were filled with determination. She straightened, raised her chin, and began again, "I am Princess Peach Toadstool of the Mushroom Kingdom," she stated clearly, holding Bowser's gaze.
Bowser curled an eyebrow at her, intrigued. Apparently Peach had rediscovered her bold streak. "Well then, Peaches, we're going to be arriving at my castle soon. I don't want any funny business, got it? Otherwise, it'll be your people who pay the price."
Peach's eyes shot silent daggers at him. "Haven't they already?"
"You know as well as I do that they're only stone right now. But stone can be crushed, now can't it?" he reminded her with a sneer.
The color drained from her cheeks, but she didn't dare break their eye contact, even as she pressed her lips into a thin, angry line. Bowser only scoffed and shook his head at her.
As they neared Bowser's castle, the sky darkened to a sooty gray and the landscape below transformed into a desolate wasteland of lava flows and charred, lifeless trees. The air grew thick with smoke, causing Princess Peach to cough and fan herself.
"Home sweet home," the Koopa King murmured.
The silence between them stretched until the formidable silhouette of Bowser's castle loomed before them. Its dark spires and broad, black brick walls made for a far more imposing palace than that of the Mushroom princess. Just before Bowser made ready to descend to it, however, she spoke.
"What… what are you going to do with me?" she asked hesitantly.
Bowser blinked, momentarily thrown off by the question. He had been considering that question the whole flight, yet… he still didn't have an answer. At least, not one that made sense.
"That's… classified," he replied slowly.
Her expression wavered between frustration and fear. "'Classified?' What kind of answer is that?"
Bowser bared his teeth and growled, attempting to mask his uncertainty with anger. "The only answer you're getting!" he snapped.
Peach had no more questions after that.
Bowser landed the copter far more steadily than its previous ascent had been. It touched the smoothened stone of his airship courtyard with a mechanical hiss as the rotors whirred down to a stop. The Koopa King stretched his stiff muscles and rolled his neck after such a long yet exciting day.
When Bowser exited his copter, dragging along a struggling princess with one hand and carrying his Power Star in the other, there was a legion of Koopa Troopas ready to greet him and congratulate him on his victory. At the front of them was Kamek, who wore a rare grin and stood with his hands folded behind his back, straight and proud.
"Felicitations on your astounding victory this day, Your Awfulness!" the Magikoopa exclaimed. However, his smile quickly fell when he saw what Bowser held. "Er… what have you got there, sire?"
"A Power Star," Bowser replied lightly.
"N-No sire, I mean the… uh…"
"Oh, the princess?" Bowser licked his lips. "She's… that's… classified."
"Classified." Kamek deadpanned, crossing his arms across his chest.
Bowser snorted an angry puff of black smoke. "Yes, classified! So enough of your questions, you treacherous old hag! She is a political prisoner, and you should have had the dungeon ready by yesterday!" he barked.
Kamek jolted. "O-of course, Your Surliness! I-if I may advise you, however, I would recommend you give me some time to prepare a proper cell." He leaned closer to the king, cupping his mouth with a hand and whispered, "A magic-proof cell?"
"Fine," the king grumbled. "Bring a cage to my throne room, then. Between me and the thousands of Koopas attending the victory celebration, we can keep an eye on her until you're done."
The wizard bowed. "A wise course of action– as always, sire. I will strive to complete the project, post haste!" he pulled out his wand to teleport away, then paused. "And I would like to seek a private audience with you later, sire, if I may."
"Yeah?"
"Just to… discuss some matters best kept away from prying ears." Kamek's gaze briefly flicked between the princess and Bowser. Then, he vanished in a flash of purple smoke without another word.
Bowser gave a disgruntled hmph before turning back to the gathered crowd of expectant Koopas.
"My army!" he began in a booming voice, making the princess in his grasp wince. "I return to you on the wings of victory! The Mushroom Kingdom is OURS!"
There was a thunderous roar of approval from the crowd. Bowser took in their praise with his chest puffed out, inhaling it like a sweet aroma. "I also come to you with a great prize," he continued. "I present to you the rarest power-up in the Eight Worlds: the Power Star!" he raised his hand so that the bright, multi-colored light shone above them like a beacon.
More applause at this, sprinkled with some "oohs" and "ahhs."
"With it, and all the other power-ups now at our disposal, the Koopas will be invincible as we march across the Eight Worlds, conquering every kingdom along the way!"
The crowd's cheers were near-deafening. "Long live the Darklands! Long live King Koopa!"
"Thank you, thank you." Bowser handed the Star to an awaiting Magikoopa, who was to secure it in a secret location. "Now prepare yourselves for the most epic victory celebration in the history of victory celebrations! Onward!"
As Bowser gallantly marched on to his throne room, surrounded by the screams and cheers of his subjects, his feet had never felt lighter. He was a champion, a legend, and now everyone knew it!
Even the intriguing, pink-clad princess that he had forced to come along.