Chapter warning: Dealing with menstrual period
Other than being a cultivator, Pan Chun also learned the ways of the farmer.
As a resident of Xuhou, Pan Chun was expected to do fieldwork and help meet the farming quota. The farmers were charged taxes and expected to forfeit a portion of their crops to the region's governing body. Pan Heng, even as a rogue cultivator, chose to help out as well.
Pan Chun worked in the rice fields and took care of root crops. She used a hoe to tend to the soil, remove weeds, and harvest the root crops. These tasks helped build her arm strength and increase her stamina, apart from her usual cultivation training.
Pan Chun also led an ox to plow fields and dispense fertilizer. It took her a while to get used to the smell…
The female ox designated to Pan Chun was affectionately named Blossom. During their first meeting, the farmers patted Blossom's side and grinned at Pan Chun, explaining that she would be under her care from now on. When Blossom, chewing on some hay, looked into Pan Chun's eyes, it was love at first sight. And they became inseparable since.
Pan Chun, being a suburban woman, had never farmed before. She didn't have much exposure to it in schooling or popular media either. Historical C-dramas and web novels generally covered stories of the upper class and nobility. In a way, she could understand why. People wanted to lose themselves in the romance of the rich and luxurious since peasant life wasn't very glamorous. Farming was hard work. Really hard work.
Pan Chun wiped the sweat off her brow as she tilled the field. Finishing her work with aching arms, she rested against Blossom's side, panting. Her hands were caked with dirt and her forehead was drenched in sweat. "This heat is unbearable!"
Blossom, who had been drinking from a pond, turned her head back to Pan Chun. "Moooo."
Pan Chun patted Blossom's side. "Ah. You hate this heat too, don't you, Blossom?"
"Mooo."
After resting, Pan Chun rode atop Blossom, pulling out her dizi for practice. The dizi's tunes resounded through the rice terraces, where other farmers worked steadily with their dogs and oxen. Blossom's tail flicked lazily as she walked on the trail back to the barn. It was truly the idyllic farmer's life.
Growing drowsy from the day's farmwork, Pan Chun tucked her dizi away into her sash and lay down, sprawled out on Blossom's back. The gentle rocking of Blossom's relaxed and steady gait lulled Pan Chun to sleep.
Once Blossom reached the barn, she stopped walking, causing Pan Chun to wake up. Pan Chun noticed that she had not fallen off Blossom with her face planted into the dirt somewhere on the farmland. Touched, Pan Chun held the ox's face in her hands and nuzzled her cheek against it. "You kept me from falling, didn't you? Good girl, Blossom!"
"Moo…"
So this is what it feels like to have muscles. - Pan Chun poked and squeezed her arms. As her body gained muscle, her breasts got smaller. Good, she wouldn't have to wrap as much cloth around her breasts. That made cross-dressing a lot easier.
Years of farmwork, sword training, and punching trees with her bare fists made her hands rough and callused. Practicing flying kicks ended with a lot of ass-landing. She ran laps around the perimeter of Xuhou to increase her speed.
Her training was so rough that her blisters got blisters. Sometimes it hurt so much that she wasn't able to do the house chores and farmwork or hold chopsticks, meaning Pan Heng had to feed her. Not wanting her to feel embarrassed, Pan Heng always reminded her that recovery and knowing one's limits were necessary for cultivation training. "Collapsing from exhaustion isn't going to make you stronger. Rest."
In a secluded and closed-off area of the forest, Pan Heng set up logs, pitfalls, and other traps. Keeping an ear out for tripwires and strange noises stressed Pan Chun out. Every little sound set her off. But this was necessary for training her reflexes and instincts.
"You can't afford to be so jumpy in this line of work! Jumping at every little noise tells malevolent beings that you're easy prey!" Pan Heng would shout at her.
"Fuck! Fuck!" Pan Chun would shriek as she dodged throwing knives and narrowly missed getting squashed by flying logs.
Now, with a golden core, Pan Chun was finally ready to take the next step in her cultivation training.
"How you implement my teachings and your cultivation skills will make the difference between life and death." Pan Heng told her. Meaning, she better take this training fucking seriously because slacking off could mean the literal death of her.
With the fear of a painful death in mind, Pan Chun listened, and she listened well.
Pan Chun studied cultivation spells, hammering them deep into the recesses of her memory. She had practice making talismans for the past few years, only because there were so many spells and incantations to remember. But without spiritual power, they had no effect. So the first time a talisman caught fire in her hand was alarming but cool. She was a bit squeamish about having to draw blood from her thumb with her teeth or a blade. But a cultivator had to be resourceful when there was no ink around.
Cultivation spells certainly brought a new element of excitement - and pain - to spars. Pan Heng shot offensive cultivation spells at Pan Chun, who used spells to counter him. She would attempt to plant a flame talisman on him, but he always managed to step out of her reach and smack a paralysis talisman on her without trouble. Damn, he was fast.
And of course, it wouldn't be a xianxia world without Qinggong, the Lightness Skill. It was how people leaped and glided around so much in wuxia and xianxia stories. She literally felt as light as a feather, maneuvering her body easily in the air. It was amazing.
Then came the whole "flying on swords" business...
"What kind of cultivator is afraid of heights?"
Pan Heng stared at Pan Chun in disbelief. She looked back at him nervously as she stood on Weifeng, which was still planted on the sweet, solid, and safe ground.
"I thought you'd gotten over the fear of heights you had as a little kid," Pan Heng said.
Pan Chun had been afraid of heights since the time when she really had been a child the first time around. It stayed into adulthood and wasn't going to leave so easily.
"S-Sorry. But this is the first time I'm riding atop a sword on my own, A-ge." No Pan Heng on sword, no safety grip. It was all up to her to make sure she didn't end up splattered like paste on the ground. Fuck.
"Don't worry. If you fall, Weifeng will catch you. Besides, you're a capable cultivator, you'll be fine, A-Chun." Pan Heng nodded at her in encouragement.
Pan Chun concentrated intensely, channeling her spiritual energy into Weifeng, making it slowly lift off the ground. She went higher and higher, getting further from the ground. Pan Heng was becoming a mere speck below.
"Trust in the sword! Trust in yourself!" Pan Heng shouted up to her.
Pan Chun gulped. - Ok. Calm down, Pan Chun. It's just like skateboarding, but in the sky, and if I fall off I could die haha… - Too bad she didn't even know how to skateboard either.
She was so high up! So...high... -Shit! Shit!- Pan Chun wobbled on Weifeng, her arms flailing. - No! No! - Her foot was-
Pan Heng shouted in alarm, "A-Chun!"
Air whooshed past Pan Chun as she plummeted towards the ground, screaming.
Weifeng rushed to reach Pan Chun as she got closer and closer to the ground.
Pan Chun's arm shot forward. Her arm lurched in her shoulder socket as she grabbed onto Weifeng's handle just in time. She dangled from Weifeng as it slowly and carefully lowered itself to the ground.
Pan Heng ran up to her, panting. "Told you Weifeng would catch you."
Pan Heng carefully inspected Pan Chun's left shoulder, arm, and neck. "Good. Nothing's dislocated." But they were feeling sore so Pan Chun massaged them with her other hand.
All that cultivation training and she still couldn't even fly properly on a sword. Really? Even other kids her age who didn't have an adult mind were excited to fly swords and showed no fear of doing so. Damn it. Just how pathetic was she? Pan Chun laid a hand to her face, her head turned towards the ground in shame. "Fuck. Fucking shit...I'm sorry."
Pan Heng sighed and ruffled her hair. "Skills take time to learn and fears take time to overcome. We'll work on it."
Weapons training wasn't so bad.
Some cultivators wielded secondary weapons alongside their swords. Other than the sword and the bow and arrow, Pan Chun studied the art of the staff. She would block and deflect with a bamboo stick, trying to fend off all of Pan Heng's attempts to whack her.
One day, during sword training, Pan Heng took Pan Chun aside. "You have a good grasp on this sword style. I think you're ready to learn a different sword style now."
Each sect had a distinct sword style. Pan Heng happened to know two sets of sword forms. Wait. Did this mean…?
"You've been in two sects?" Pan Chun asked.
"Yes." Pan Heng didn't explain any further than that.
"These new sword forms are only to be used as a last resort, understand?" Pan Heng moved the wooden sword in a series of sharp, aggressive jabs.
This new sword style was definitely different. Unlike the first style Pan Chun learned, this new one focused more on offense than defense, more on stabbing and incapacitating the opponent than deflecting and blocking.
Pan Heng finished his display of the sword forms. "Be certain that no other cultivators witness you using these forms. It's not worth the trouble dealing with their questions."
Was this other sect too famous or infamous in the cultivation world? Just what had it done that Pan Chun had to avoid any witnesses? But then again, there wasn't much of a point to indulge her curiosity about it. Pan Heng knew the cultivation world much better than she did. Whatever advice he gave her to avoid attention from other cultivators was good advice. "Understood."
"Listen, A-Chun, as a cultivator, you're going to see some horrifying shit." Pan Heng pointed a tree branch at the drawing of a vicious ghoul nailed to the tree.
Pan Chun gripped her notebook and writing brush tightly, shifting in discomfort in her seat. Oh right. She was going to have to deal with ghosts. Real ghosts. A lot. Listening to ghost stories was one thing. But having to personally deal with them yourself was another! "That's not very reassuring."
Pan Heng tapped the tree branch to his hand. "Wasn't meant to be." He turned back to the drawing and drew squiggly lines coming out from the ghoul. "Listen closely, A-Chun. Don't let their killing intent freeze you in fear. Immobility leaves you vulnerable to attack."
That might be a problem, Pan Chun thought. She was so afraid of ghosts as a young child that she walked down the dark hallway to her father's room with a blanket draped over her. She was too scared to sleep alone in her room. Thanks a lot, Scooby-Doo.
First heights, now ghosts and man-eating beasts. Being a cultivator, Pan Chun was going to have to suck it up and put her fear for a lot of things aside.
No one said becoming a cultivator would be easy.
Even so, I can't quit, despite how scared I am. I just can't.
"This is how you make a campfire."
Pan Heng was teaching Pan Chun how to survive in the wilderness. It was essential knowledge for night hunting.
Pan Chun and Pan Heng sat around the campfire, roasting the fish they caught at the river.
"Many monsters lurk in the forests at night." Pan Heng bared his teeth and held up his hands like claws. "Big scary beasts that could eat up humans like-"
"A-ge, I'm going to have to ask you to leave out the graphic descriptions while I'm eating."
"What's the matter? Not in the mood for a scary story?"
"Nope. Especially when I'm eating." Pan Chun chewed the fish in a way that it crunched very loudly, loud enough to drown out another person's voice.
Pan Heng got the hint and grabbed a stick of fish to munch on too.
After they finished their dinner, they sat together in silence, listening to the crackling of the fire, the chirping of crickets, and the sounds of the forest at night.
Pan Heng added a branch to the fire, silently looking at the flames. "...I was a rice farmer's son."
Pan Chun turned to Pan Heng with shock. - Well, this is a first! Pan Heng's never liked talking about his life before Xuhou!
"My father and I delivered rice to a sect near our village. I'd ride with him on our donkey-pulled wagon. Heh, he'd scold me for bouncing around on the rice bags." Pan Heng smiled softly. "Eventually, I became such good friends with one of the sect members that the sect leader offered to recruit me."
"So the sect accepted you as a cultivator? That's how you got your cultivation training?" Pan Chun asked.
"Yes."
"Then you learned a different set of sword forms from being in another sect..." If Pan Heng was opening up a bit, then maybe he'll finally tell her?... "Which sects were they?"
Pan Heng shrugged. "Eh. I told you. Can't remember. It's all in the past. It's not important."
Pan Heng said nothing more, and Pan Chun knew not to pry.
For as long as Pan Chun knew him, Pan Heng never dressed in the lavish robes that cultivators were known for. Instead, he wore the shabby clothes of a rural villager.
Pan Heng said that he was originally from a rice-farming family. That explained why he was so knowledgeable about farming rice for Xuhou. But why stay in a remote mountain village like Xuhou? Why wasn't he out fighting supernatural creatures for glory and cultivating to immortality? He didn't sound very fond of the cultivation world whenever he spoke of it. Maybe he grew tired of sect politics and decided to retire in Xuhou.
Pan Heng stood up. "All right. As I told you earlier, you're going to have to put your wilderness survival skills into practice. I've left you distress signal talismans in case of emergencies. Is that clear?"
"Understood. I can handle myself for a few days, Pan Heng." She could do this. It was going to be like a solo camping trip. Plus, she was camping in a part of the forest Pan Heng made monster-proof since she didn't have her sword yet. The campfire would keep away wild animals and her hunting gear would provide an adequate measure of defense and sustenance. Yes, she could certainly manage this.
Pan Heng nodded. "I'll leave you to it then." He turned around, in the direction of Xuhou.
"One last thing." Pan Heng turned his head back to Pan Chun and pointed up at the sky. The night sky was dotted with countless stars. "There are People beyond People, and Heavens beyond the Heavens [1]."
Pan Chun put a hand to her chin in thought. "So...what you're saying is that things are bigger than what's seen on the surface?" she guessed.
"Hm. Close. But my point is," Pan Heng turned his body to fully face Pan Chun, "there will always be someone or something stronger than you around the corner. Be ready and never become complacent with your abilities."
Ah. That's what Pan Heng meant. Being from another world and cultivating without the resources of a sect, Pan Chun was at a disadvantage. She'll definitely have to be careful. She nodded her head decisively. "I will."
"In the path of cultivation, always remain diligent and humble. Remember that."
It was weird, being a teenager again. And with being a teenager again, came the resurgence of...puberty.
When Pan Chun saw that spot of brown on her underwear, she cursed quietly to herself. Her life before having the period again was good while it lasted.
So that left Pan Chun with a problem. She had no idea how women dealt with their periods in ancient times or within a xianxia world. And Pan Heng was a man who still had no idea of her true gender. So there would be no help from him. She had to seek help from the people who definitely knew their stuff.
So one afternoon, Pan Chun approached the village women at their local gathering. In the midst of their housework and conversations, the women paused at Pan Chun's arrival. The teenage girls blushed and looked away. Meanwhile, the adults and elderly eyed Pan Chun with surprise and suspicion. "Hmm? What does this young man want?"
Pan Chun bowed respectfully. "I apologize for intruding upon your space, Aunties and Ladies. But I need your help with an important matter."
The women's murmurs increased. Was this young man asking for one of their daughter's hands in marriage? Didn't men usually ask for help from other men?
The eldest of the village women, Cai Jinghua, spoke directly to Pan Chun. "What is it that this young one wants?"
"My thanks for hearing this young one out. Allow me to explain. One day, I was out at the market and speaking with the ginger seller and his wife. Suddenly, the wife clutched her abdomen with such pain!" This story was true. The lady winced and held onto her husband's arm for support, her other hand on her abdomen because her cramps were that horrible. Fortunately, the ginger seller was a kind man and rushed to comfort his wife and help her rest. Witnessing that reminded Pan Chun with dread that she was going to have to endure the same pain eventually.
Pan Chun's expression grew anguished. "I wish to know how to relieve my future wife's pain. I cannot bear to stand by idly while she suffers."
The young adult village women nodded in understanding and giggled among themselves. "Such a polite and loving young man! Whoever marries him shall be lucky indeed!"
The teenage girls kept their heads down, focusing on their housework with new vigor, their blushing faces hidden from Pan Chun's view.
The village grannies gave each other sly looks that Pan Chun couldn't quite read.
And so, the village women showed Pan Chun how to sew loincloths and cotton dudous. They taught her which herbs and substances helped relieve period pains. "Trust us. These will help soothe your future wife's pain."
Ever since Pan Wukun made her own cotton dudou to wear, she never had to wrap layers of cloth around her breasts to flatten them again. It was so relieving!
In gratitude, Pan Chun made packs of protection talismans, which hid a "fiery" surprise. The aunties and grannies gave some to their daughters, nieces, and granddaughters, including the newly wedded wives just in case their husbands mistreated them.
Whenever her period interrupted training, Pan Chun would rest as needed. She explained to Pan Heng that training with a golden core was exhausting more of her energy than before and he didn't suspect a thing.
Until...
"So what's with those baskets of bloody rags you keep tossing out recently?" Pan Heng asked nonchalantly.
Pan Chun choked. - Shit! He saw that?!
"If you're seriously wounded, just tell me. No need to die from blood loss on account of your pride," Pan Heng said.
Pan Chun rubbed the back of her neck. "Well, I'm not actually wounded, you see…" - Shit! I can't let A-ge inspect my body for wounds! Think fast! Think fast! - "I've been...helping the butcher cut meat!"
Pan Heng was skeptical. "Oh really? You always look nauseous when you see the butcher bring a pig out for slaughter. You run as far away as you can and cover your ears so you don't hear the pig squealing. You can't stand the smell of freshly slaughtered meat." He looked at Pan Chun directly in the eyes. "I'll just go ask the butcher myself. Hear what he has to say."
Pan Chun quickly stepped in front of Pan Heng. "No! No, that won't be necessary."
Pan Heng stared down at her sternly. "Pan Chun."
Uh oh. He said her full name, enunciating it in a low voice. Pan Chun had enough experience with her father to know that Pan Heng's patience was running thin.
"If there's a problem you're having trouble dealing with, I need to know as your guardian." Pan Heng crossed his arms and tapped his foot in waiting.
"I-I...because-because-!" Pan Chun stammered. - Ah! There's his warning scowl! - "Because-because I'm actually a woman!"
A few moments of awkward silence passed before Pan Heng freaked out. "Wh-what?!" he sputtered.
Pan Chun sighed. "Yeah, that's right. I'm a girl. A female. A woman."
"But the blood…" Pan Heng trailed off, still looking lost.
Pan Chun inhaled. Ah. Of course, only women knew the full details about the menstrual period in this era. "It's the menstrual period. You know, a woman's time of the month."
Pan Heng's cheeks rapidly flushed. "Ah. So that's what it is."
"Well? Are you angry? Knowing that I've hidden that I'm a woman for so long?" Pan Chun asked.
Pan Heng didn't quite look at her, staring blankly out into space. "No, just...very shocked." He awkwardly cleared his throat. "I haven't done anything to make you uncomfortable, have I?" He would never forgive himself if he did.
Pan Chun shook her head. "No, you haven't. If you had, I would have told you off or kicked you in the shin if it was a severe offense."
Pan Heng snorted. "Yes, I'm certain you would have."
Pan Chun drummed her fingers on the table. "So does this change things between us? Are you still going to continue training me in cultivation?"
"Women become cultivators too. You being a woman changes nothing, except..." Pan Heng placed a hand to his chin with an amused smile. "Rather than a younger brother, I have a younger sister."
"I'm mentally older than you are," Pan Chun deadpanned.
Pan Heng rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Yeah."
Pan Chun lightly punched Pan Heng in the arm. "Don't go easier on me in training just because you know I'm a woman now, 'kay?"
Pan Heng punched her back in the arm. "Wasn't planning to."
Glossary
[1] There are People beyond People, and Heavens beyond the Heavens (人外有人，天外有天 rén wài yǒu rén, tiān wài yǒu tiān): "There's always someone better than you." (Source: The Chinese Idioms and Phrases section of the Glossary page on immortalmountain wordpress.)
A/N: Yeah, that part about walking down a dark hallway covered under a blanket is true. My mom would leave for work early in the morning. I would have to quickly walk down a dark hallway to my dad's room because I was too scared to sleep alone in my room. It was a short walk and my blanket wasn't even white. It was a fluffy pink one with a picture of a bear on it. Little me really thought that would fool ghosts lmao. And yeah, I'm pretty sure I was first introduced to the concept of ghosts through Scooby-Doo when I was a little kid, because I don't remember my parents talking about ghosts around me or even telling me about them. But my cousins told me that the adults in our family said that I saw a ghost as a little kid, but I don't really remember that either...