Wei Wuxian couldn't die.
He shouldn't die! Not right now! Not before the Sunshot Campaign!
Not while he was still so young…
Pan Wukun's heart pounded rapidly.
She was not even officially CPR-certified. All she had was whatever CPR basics her certified cousin taught her with a pillow when they got bored at a family party once.
But she needed to move quickly.
Please let this work. Wei Wuxian can't die! He just can't!
Pan Wukun pinched Wei Wuxian's nose shut and pried his mouth open.
First. Two rescue breaths. I need to get the water out of his lungs.
Pan Wukun planted her mouth on top of Wei Wuxian's.
Everyone made startled gasps.
Jiang Cheng gripped his sword's hilt. "You dare take advantage of him like this?!"
Before Jiang Cheng could draw his sword, Lan Xichen held an arm out to stop him. "Wait! Pan-xiushi must be trying to save Wei Wuxian!"
Pan Wukun blew air into Wei Wuxian's mouth. After two breaths, she shouted, "Help me remove his robes!"
Jiang Cheng's face turned red from anger and embarrassment. "What?! First, a kiss, and now you want to undress him too?!"
"It's not like that! I have no such intentions!" Pan Wukun squeaked. "Please! Time is of the essence here!" she pleaded.
Jiang Cheng grumbled but helped Pan Wukun as she asked.
Next. Thirty chest compressions.
Pan Wukun's hands pressed down on Wei Wuxian's bare chest.
Wei Wuxian…please. Please don't die! Please don't die! This world still needs you!
Crack! - Wei Wuxian's sternum and ribs broke.
"Stop it! You're hurting him!" Jiang Cheng tried to pry Pan Wukun off of Wei Wuxian. But before he could grab her, he was pulled back by Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji.
"That's supposed to happen! I need to reach his heart to make it beat again!" Pan Wukun shouted. If she didn't get Wei Wuxian's heart circulating soon, he'll be braindead!
Pan Wukun didn't know how long she repeated the cycle of two rescue breaths and thirty chest compressions.
But Wei Wuxian coughed, water spewing out of his mouth. His eyes shot open and he gasped for air.
"Wei Wuxian!" Jiang Cheng cried in relief.
Everyone else cheered. Lan Wangji's shoulders relaxed. Pan Wukun patted a hand on her chest, sighing in relief.
Wei Wuxian rubbed his head, groaning. "What? What's with all the cheering? Is there a celebration I don't know about?"
Wei Wuxian tried to sit up. "Gah!" He winced and clutched a hand to his chest.
Jiang Cheng and Pan Wukun moved to support him.
"Sorry," Pan Wukun said. "I had to break your ribs and sternum earlier to save you."
"Really? Was such violence so necessary, Pan-xiushi?" Wei Wuxian joked.
"Wei-gongzi will need to be taken to the healers back at the Cloud Recesses," Lan Xichen said. "He will need rest and they should be able to help him treat his broken bones."
Lan Xichen turned to Lan Wangji. "Wangji. I have to stay here and check up on everyone and analyze the Waterborne Abyss situation. Can I depend on you to lead the injured back to the infirmary safely?"
Lan Wangji nodded. "Yes, xiongzhang."
Jiang Cheng lifted Wei Wuxian into his arms, careful not to hit and bump Wei Wuxian's chest.
"Aw, Jiang Cheng. Are you practicing on me for your future bride?" Wei Wuxian teased.
"Shut up! You almost died and you still have the energy to joke around? I'm trying to make sure I don't make your injuries worse!" Jiang Cheng shouted.
"You didn't say no," Wei Wuxian said in a sing-song voice.
Jiang Cheng huffed. "You are lucky you are injured." Otherwise, he would have smacked him.
Wei Wuxian snickered.
Pan Wukun rolled her eyes. Yes, Wei Wuxian was definitely fine.
As Pan Wukun started to walk back toward Meng Xingyao, her legs wobbled. She collapsed to the ground.
"Pan-xiushi!" the others cried in alarm.
With the adrenaline wearing off, Pan Wukun was hit by qi exhaustion.
Shit. She used up an awful lot of spiritual power swimming in Biling Lake to save Wei Wuxian. Now she couldn't even move her limbs to stand up.
"Wukun-ge!" Meng Xingyao tried to lift Pan Wukun up. But she was just too heavy for him.
Lan Wangji came over and lifted Pan Wukun into his arms.
With one arm still holding on to Pan Wukun, Lan Wangji made the sword seal with his hand, commanding Bichen to fly out of its sheath. Bichen floated horizontally above the ground so that Lan Wangji could set his feet atop it. He flew on Bichen, carrying Pan Wukun with both arms.
Pan Wukun's head lay against Lan Wangji's shoulder. - So this is what sandalwood smells like…
Her eyes drifted closed.
Pan Wukun was alone in the infirmary.
Alone.
With Wei Wuxian.
Heavens save her.
Wei Wuxian chattered away at Pan Wukun. "Over the past month, I had to copy two of the most boring chapters of the Lan Clan precepts in the Library Pavilion under Lan Zhan's supervision!" He made a pained expression, covering his mouth with a hand. "He kept using the silencing spell on me! No fun at all!"
"And I wasn't allowed to leave the Cloud Recesses either!" Wei Wuxian shuddered. "Can you imagine? Being stuck inside the Cloud Recesses for an entire month? Bland food and no alcohol. I couldn't even go out to get any Emperor's Smile and some real food!"
A wide smile spread across Wei Wuxian's face. "But at least that month ended on a good note. I introduced Lan Zhan to erotica for the first time!" He snickered. "Can you believe he's never seen erotica before? So sheltered!"
Pan Wukun didn't answer, simply nodding along so that Wei Wuxian wouldn't bother her about ignoring him. She already learned that lesson in Caiyi Town. Her limbs were sore and she was tired as fuck. Yet she was forced to suffer in Wei Wuxian's company.
If only Meng Xingyao was here, then things would be bearable. But he checked in on Pan Wukun more than enough times already. Hopefully, he was handling himself well on his own within the Cloud Recesses.
Thankfully, things did not blow up in Pan Wukun's face with Meng Xingyao and Wei Wuxian within each other's vicinity. All Meng Xingyao did was be courteous and formal with Wei Wuxian before leaving the infirmary, thank goodness.
Apparently, Jiang Yanli and Jiang Cheng had visited Wei Wuxian in the infirmary while Pan Wukun was still unconscious. Jiang Yanli had brought two baskets of food and treats, one for Wei Wuxian and one for Pan Wukun.
Pan Wukun thought, Oh Jiang Yanli. So kind and generous to someone she doesn't even know. And her cooking? Delicious beyond words.
Wei Wuxian gave Pan Wukun a sly grin, his hand hovering next to his mouth like he was sharing a secret. "Nie Huaisang, my fellow disciple, has an entire erotica collection to share!" He laughed. "We should look at it together over a drink of Emperor's Smile sometime, Pan Chun!"
Pan Wukun stared at Wei Wuxian incredulously. "Pan Chun?"
Wei Wuxian hummed. "I saved your life and you saved mine. That makes us close enough to be friends now, doesn't it?"
"What? No! Saving another cultivator's life is just part of the job! Nothing special!" Pan Wukun argued.
"But you almost drowned saving me. We have a special bond in almost drowning together. Why wouldn't I want to be friends with you?" Wei Wuxian responded.
Pan Wukun scowled. "Because I don't-"
"Wei-gongzi. Pan-xiushi. It is time for lunch." Two GusuLan sect healers entered the infirmary with food trays.
Wei Wuxian grimaced at Pan Wukun but he flashed a smile at the healers. He didn't like having to eat more of the bland food from the GusuLan sect's kitchens. But he held his tongue, especially in front of the people in charge of caring for his body.
For Pan Wukun, it wasn't actually bad. It wasn't unlike the vegetarian dishes she and her family ate during gatherings at Buddhist temples. She especially loved the GusuLan sect's mushrooms.
One GusuLan healer was assigned to each patient. It was important for one healer to work with one patient at a time. Cultivators had a golden core and spiritual energy to maintain, adding a whole other spiritual body system to maintain aside from the usual body functions non-cultivators had. It was very delicate work.
"Continue resting here for a few more days and your spiritual energy should be fully replenished," Pan Wukun's healer said to her.
"That's good to hear." The sooner Pan Wukun was out of here and far away from Wei Wuxian and the Cloud Recesses, the better.
Luckily, the healers only had to check Pan Wukun's limbs to observe the state of her spiritual energy and meridians. They didn't have to undress her at all, thank goodness. Her secret was still safe.
Wei Wuxian's healer placed his hand on Wei Wuxian's chest. "Wei-gongzi, your ribs and sternum are recovering nicely. Another week and you will be able to resume your studies without issue."
Wei Wuxian pouted. "Aw. Not even a single break in studying for me after recovering from such grievous injuries?"
"If you need further time to rest, Wei-gongzi, I can request Grandmaster Lan to extend your stay here at the Cloud Recesses. That way, you will be able to catch up with your studies in good health," the healer said.
Wei Wuxian rapidly waved his hands in protest. "Nonononono, it's fine! I'm able to study quick enough to still finish within a year at the Cloud Recesses!" No way in hell he was going to spend even an extra second living under the restrictions of the GusuLan sect's three thousand rules with no alcohol and spicy food.
"Very well." Wei Wuxian's healer continued his medical examination.
Pan Wukun relaxed in her bed. At least she could leave knowing that Wei Wuxian was going to be okay.
Pan Wukun's healer cleared his throat. "Pan-xiushi, if you don't mind the healers asking, we are quite curious about the mouth-to-mouth breathing method you used."
Pan Wukun faced the healer. She must've recovered enough to be in a good enough position for the healer to be asking her such things. She didn't mind engaging with people's inquisitiveness when it didn't involve personal affairs. She nodded at him to continue.
The healer brightened. "Thank you, Pan-xiushi." His expression turned contemplative. "Usually, we would've used bamboo tubes and have two people alternately blowing into them. Or blow irritating powders into the victim's nose. We always have tubes and powder on hand for drowning and hanging incidents."
"Yes, I know." Pan Wukun was taught this era's CPR method by Pan Heng, of course. There was also a CPR method to save hanging victims before they died and became hanging ghosts. - People from ancient times were a lot smarter than we give them credit for.
"But the method you used worked much faster. With bamboo tubes, it would've taken thirty minutes or even as long as half a day to resuscitate Wei-gongzi," the healer explained.
"Yes." Pan Wukun knew that too. That was why it was necessary for her to give Wei Wuxian mouth-to-mouth.
Pan Wukun hurriedly turned to Wei Wuxian. "It was not a kiss, Wei-gongzi! It was merely a medical procedure I learned a long time ago. I was just saving your life."
Wei Wuxian giggled. "Aw. And here I thought my face was pretty enough to practice with for your future maiden."
Pan Wukun turned away from Wei Wuxian, rolling her eyes. That was Wei Wuxian for you. He couldn't resist making a joke or teasing others when the opportunity presented itself.
"Pan-xiushi," one of the healers said. "Once you've fully recovered, would you be willing to teach us your mouth-to-mouth breathing method?"
Pan Wukun regarded the healer calmly and thoughtfully.
It wouldn't be her first time teaching others mouth-to-mouth CPR. She already taught Pan Heng to the best of her abilities.
The GusuLan sect had so many resources (and money) at its disposal. Surely the sect could provide Pan Wukun with a generous reward for her CPR lessons?
But most of the canon characters were at the Cloud Recesses right now. Did she really want to stay at Gusu any longer than she had to?
Teaching others mouth-to-mouth CPR...She should return to Xuhou to do that sometime. Pan Heng would make sure to teach the villagers, but Pan Wukun could always go back to help out (she missed everyone so much).
"I'll think about it," Pan Wukun finally said.
The healers nodded. "Understood."
The doors to the infirmary opened.
The healers turned around and saluted. "Er-gongzi."
Lan Wangji greeted the healers. Then he placed a basket of loquats and a pouch of coins on the table next to Pan Wukun's bed. "Qi Ting and Qi Xin said that you forgot something."
It was the same basket of loquats Qi Xin had gifted Pan Wukun and Meng Xingyao back in Caiyi Town. The pouch of coins must've been payment for Qi Ting's escort job.
Pan Wukun bowed her head. "Thank you, Lan-er-gongzi."
Wei Wuxian clapped his hands. "Oh! Oh! Loquats! Pan Chun, can I have some too?"
Pan Wukun looked at Wei Wuxian blankly. - There was no stopping him from calling her by her birth name, was there? - She looked back at the basket of loquats.
Wei Wuxian did almost die saving her. He didn't even really know her and yet…
…She and Meng Xingyao couldn't finish that entire basket of loquats by themselves anyway. She hated wasting food.
Pan Wukun sighed. "Go ahead."
Wei Wuxian cheered. "Many thanks, Pan Chun!"
Before Wei Wuxian even started moving towards the loquats, his healer hurriedly stopped him. "Wei-gongzi! You cannot move your upper body too much! Your ribs and sternum haven't completely recovered yet!"
Pan Wukun allowed Wei Wuxian's healer to gather some loquats to give to Wei Wuxian.
Wei Wuxian munched on the loquats happily. Then he paused, turning to Lan Wangji with a single loquat in hand. "Lan Zhan! Catch!"
Lan Wangji caught the loquat with one hand and immediately tossed it back to Wei Wuxian. "No."
Wei Wuxian shook his head. "I knew you were not going to want it. But I still had hope…Oh well!"
Wei Wuxian tossed Lan Wangji's loquat to Pan Wukun instead. "For you, Pan Chun!"
Pan Wukun caught it and mumbled, "What's the point of passing me one? I already have an entire basket."
Wait. Coming from Wei Wuxian, did this mean anything?...No, it was just a friendly gesture!
But he passed it to Lan Wangji first because…
Wait. Lan Wangji was here.
Then it hit Pan Wukun.
She had to give Wei Wuxian mouth-to-mouth CPR. Yes, it was a life-threatening situation. But her mouth still touched Wei Wuxian's!
…How did Lan Wangji feel about that?
Pan Wukun glanced at Lan Wangji. She couldn't read the expression on his face. It appeared stoic as always. But you never knew with Lan Wangji and his barely perceptible microexpressions. - Damn it! I don't have Lan Xichen's Brother Reader abilities!
Pan Wukun inwardly panicked. - Lan Wangji has developed feelings for Wei Wuxian at this point, right? Please don't let this jeopardize Wangxian! Please don't let Lan Wangji kill me for this in the future!
Pan Wukun shut her eyes and took a deep breath.
No. No. This wasn't the time to lose her composure. She needed to think.
Calm. Calm. Do not freak out in front of everyone.
Pan Wukun peeled the loquat and silently chewed on it. Eating always helped her calm herself.
"Lan Zhan! I haven't properly thanked you for saving us from the Waterborne Abyss yet! Carrying both Pan Chun and me on your back at once? Wow! You're so strong! Underneath those robes, you must have a lot of muscles!" Wei Wuxian praised.
Lan Wangji's ears turned pink.
Pan Wukun turned her head away. - Please, you two! Don't flirt in front of me. I can't handle this third-wheeling!
"All three of us should dine together at this Hunan restaurant in Caiyi Town sometime!" Wei Wuxian rubbed his hands excitedly. "I've heard their spicy food's the best!"
Lan Wangji replied, "No" while Pan Wukun said, "No thanks".
Wei Wuxian sighed in disappointment. Then he crossed his arms behind his head with a grin. "I won't give up that easily. I'll keep asking until you accept. I've got to properly express my gratitude."
Pan Wukun rubbed her thumbs. - Gratitude, huh?
Lan Wangji had saved her life along with Wei Wuxian's. If he hadn't they would've-
No. Don't go there.
Pan Wukun grabbed a handful of loquats from the basket. Still seated in bed, she bowed from her waist to Lan Wangji and held the loquats out to him with both hands. "Please consider it a gift of gratitude for saving our lives at Biling Lake."
Lan Wangji paused at Pan Wukun's words, considering the loquats carefully. He glanced at the nearby healers. Then he nodded and tucked the loquats away into his robe's qiankun sleeve.
Wei Wuxian gaped at Lan Wangji. "Eh? So you accept the loquats from Pan Wukun and not me?"
"It is considered rude to reject gifts of gratitude for saving another's life." Lan Wangji turned away from Wei Wuxian and left the infirmary.
Wei Wuxian puffed his cheeks and crossed his arms. "And yet Lan Zhan refused to eat at the Hunan restaurant with me."
Pan Wukun sank back into her bed and sighed.
Now it wasn't just Meng Xingyao, Jiang Cheng, and Wei Wuxian who knew about her existence, but Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen too.
Just what had she gotten herself into?
Walking down a path within the Cloud Recesses, Lan Wangji chewed on a loquat. It was sweet and tangy.
Ahead of him, Lan Wangji caught sight of Lan Xichen.
Lan Xichen beamed. "Wangji! I see that you decided to try eating loquats!"
"Pan-xiushi gave them to me." Lan Wangji held out a loquat to Lan Xichen. "Would you like one, xiongzhang?"
Lan Xichen's heart warmed. "Of course. Thank you, Wangji!"
So Lan Wangji had accepted Pan Wukun's gift of loquats. Lan Xichen approved.
Lan Wangji had learned good manners and the sect's rules from his older brother and uncle well.
"Be respectful and humble."
"Be amicable and unedited."
"Have affection and gratefulness."
"Have courtesy and integrity."
"Be grateful."
"Wangji, how do you feel about Pan-xiushi?" Lan Xichen asked.
He noticed that Lan Wangji's lips set in a tight line. "Ah…you are not sure whether you enjoy or despise Pan-xiushi's presence."
"Mn."
So it wasn't out of friendliness, but adherence to the sect's rules that prompted Lan Wangji to take the loquats.
Qi Ting and Qi Xin actually gave Pan Wukun's loquats and coin pouch to Lan Xichen first. Then he passed them on to Lan Wangji.
Lan Xichen hoped that Lan Wangji would take interest in others, including Wei Wuxian. He wished his brother befriended people he could trust and confide in. But Lan Wangji was keeping his distance from his peers as usual.
Lan Xichen smiled softly at Lan Wangji. "Pan-xiushi warned us about the Waterborne Abyss, getting us and the sect disciples out of danger. He even risked his life to save Wei-gongzi. He can't be such a bad person. Appreciate the good people."
And Pan Wukun was even thoughtful enough to give some loquats to Lan Wangji. That was a good sign to Lan Xichen.
A good chance for friendship.
Lan Xichen allowed Lan Wangji a moment to mull over his words.
But even then, Lan Xichen would not force his brother to befriend those who discomforted him. "Whether you welcome Pan-xiushi's company is up to you, Wangji. Trust in your judgment."
Lan Wangji nodded. "Yes, xiongzhang."
Wei Wuxian lay in bed, humming idly.
He was so bored.
There was no erotica. No Emperor's Smile. No papers to doodle on. No Lan Wangji to tease!
Wait. Pan Wukun was still here.
Wei Wuxian looked over at Pan Wukun, whose back was turned to him.
"Pssst, Pan Chun. Are you asleep?" Wei Wuxian made sure that his voice was soft enough not to awaken Pan Wukun but loud enough that an awake person could still hear it.
Pan Wukun didn't answer him, breathing steadily in bed.
So Pan Wukun was asleep. Shame Wei Wuxian couldn't have some fun with him.
They probably already had enough fun at Biling Lake, haha.
…Biling Lake.
Wei Wuxian's fingers brushed his lips.
Did mouth contact with Pan Wukun count as his first kiss?
Wei Wuxian's face and neck grew warm.
No! No, it did not!
Pan Wukun even said so!
Besides, Wei Wuxian was still saving his first kiss for his future lover…Thanks to Pan Wukun, he still had the chance.
If it weren't for Pan Wukun, he wouldn't even be here right now.
Wei Wuxian grabbed two of the loquats Pan Wukun gave him and tapped them together. - Ok. He was less bored now.
How generous of Pan Wukun to save his life and give him loquats.
Pan Wukun was a really cool guy. It wouldn't hurt to get to know him more.
But Pan Wukun was so adamant about refusing Wei Wuxian's friendship. Even when they had almost died together. So stubborn!
Wei Wuxian smiled mischievously.
No problem. He was just going to have to win Pan Wukun over with his charms.
Pan Wukun kept her back turned to Wei Wuxian, unable to bear facing him.
She put her mouth on top of Wei Wuxian's. Wei Wuxian's!
No! No! That wasn't a kiss!
Sure, MDZS was a romance story. But her mouth touching Wei Wuxian's meant nothing! Nothing!
Being bridal carried by Lan Wangji meant nothing either!
Nothing, damn it!
Wait. Her mouth met Wei Wuxian's before Lan Wangji's…
Oh no…
Pan Wukun inwardly shuddered.
What if Lan Wangji got drunk one day and she was in his presence? He would pull Bichen on her ass!
All kinds of frenzied and panicked thoughts ran through Pan Wukun's head of Lan Wangji stabbing her with Bichen like a shish kebab.
No! No! What have I done?! Why do I keep getting dragged into shit?
Lan Wangji, have mercy on me!
Lan Wangji lay flat on his back in bed, his eyes focused on the ceiling.
Wei Wuxian. Wei Wuxian…
Such an infuriating young man.
On the last day of copying "Highest Justice" and "Standard Etiquette", Wei Wuxian tricked Lan Wangji into seeing erotica of a man and a woman, even two men!
Images of Wei Wuxian appeared nonstop in Lan Wangji's mind.
Wei Wuxian grinning at Lan Wangji in the moonlight before drinking an entire jar of Emperor's Smile right in front of him. Oh, how his throat bobbed…No, bad thoughts!
Wei Wuxian laying unconscious on the shore of Biling Lake with his chest exposed…
Warmth spread through Lan Wangji. His ears turned pink.
Pan Wukun's mouth on Wei Wuxian's…
The warmth fizzled away, replaced by a cold iciness.
Lan Wangji's mood soured.
But why was he being irrationally upset?
Pan Wukun had only done it to save Wei Wuxian's life. But Lan Wangji couldn't help the irritation he felt.
At Caiyi Town and Biling Lake…Wei Wuxian laughed and joked in Pan Wukun's presence.
Pan Wukun and Wei Wuxian were now in the same infirmary room together.
Wei Wuxian had called Pan Wukun by his birth name.
Lan Wangji's hands tightly gripped his blanket. A frown settled on his face.
Did Wei Wuxian just mess around with every person he aggravated?
Lan Wangji wasn't sure how to feel about this Pan Wukun yet.
But he knew exactly how he felt about Wei Wuxian jesting with Pan Wukun.
(Why? Why was he feeling this way?)
Remember the rule!
"Do not harbor doubts and jealousy."
"Do not harbor doubts and jealousy."
Lan Wangji's hands threatened to nearly tear his blanket apart.
He didn't like it. He didn't like it at all.
A/N: The (www.) trio has finally been assembled. Get it? 'Cause "Wukun", "Wuxian", and "Wangji" all start with "W". It's related to the LAN and Wi-fi joke with regard to Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian's names.
Links to the research I did on Ancient Chinese CPR can be found on the Archiveofourown and Quotev versions of this fanfic. But here are the important notes.
On a Goodreads review of Vol.1 of MDZS's official English edition published by Seven Seas Entertainment, user Ling pointed out that the original novel's reference to "Qingtan" revealed that MDZS took place sometime during the Wei-Jin period (200-400AD). Sadly, "Qingtan" was translated to "symposium" instead in the Seven Seas version so English-speaking readers wouldn't have known this.
For the sake of the plot, the MDZS world has not developed mouth-to-mouth resuscitation yet. So this MDZS fanfic will be set before the Jin dynasty (265 ~ 420 AD).
Just a heads up that this fanfic has irregular/sporadic updates.
Sometimes I update within 2 weeks. Other times, 2 months. Longest I've been gone is 4 months, I believe.
It depends on how busy I get and how long it takes me to finish writing the new chapters while organizing the story outline.
*August 23, 2022 Edit: So a reader on archiveofourown pointed out to me that MDZS doesn't take place during any specific real-world time period and has dubious historicity. So now this fanfic won't follow a specific historical time period. But it'll still be in ancient China or at least an era resembling ancient China.
Another reader also pointed out to me that it's possible, but not required to break ribs during CPR. It probably depends on the situation, whether the CPR rescuer is professionally trained, and how brittle the victim's bones are.*