A/N: Hello, my lovely readers! I've been trying to write two chapters and then post, but I threw that idea away for another time and decided to post this now. I've gotten some lovely reviews, but one stuck out to me the most. To the Guest review who said I turned Jacob into a narcissistic bastard, in a way I guess I did. What I was trying to do with this story was show that everyone is hurting in some way. Bella had to deal with abandonment issues and Jacob has to deal with his choices being ripped away from while still dealing with his past and current feelings. Jacob isn't a villain, he is merely living his life. Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. That doesn't mean he's a horrible person. Jacob didn't mean to push Bella to attempt and neither did Lauren. They were both just hurt and dealing with their own demons and didn't think how it would affect others. I hope you continue to read the story because everything goes up from here.

Okay, now that I'm done with that tangent, I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Reviews and tell me what you think! Happy reading!

WARNING: GRAPHIC MENTIONS OF SELF HARM, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, MENTAL ILLNESS, SUICIDE ATTEMPTS, VIOLENCE, GORE, SEXUAL SITUATIONS, GRAPHIC LANGUAGE, UNDERAGE DRINKING, UNDERAGE SEXUAL SITUATIONS, CHILD ABUSE, STALKING, AND TRIGGERING IMAGERY. IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED BY THIS OR DO NOT ENJOY IT, DO NOT READ.

Chapter Nineteen.

Bella's POV:

"When we were five, they asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up. Our answers were things like astronaut, president, or in my case, a princess. When we were ten, they asked again. We answered rockstar, cowboy, or in my case, a gold medalist. But now that we've grown up, they want a serious answer. Well, how about this, "Who the hell knows?" This isn't the time to make hard and fast decisions, this is the time to make mistakes. Take the wrong train and get stuck somewhere. Fall in love. A lot. Major in philosophy because there is no way to make a career out of that. Change your mind and change it again, because nothing's permanent. So make as many mistakes as you can. That way, someday when they ask what we wanna be, we won't have to guess. We'll know."

Jessica's speech still sits ingrained in my mind even as Dad, Embry, and I ate at the diner. Mom had called to congratulate me and give an excuse about why she couldn't make it. I tried to not feel too disappointed. We hadn't been close since I moved and of course, she'd want to be with Phil all of the time. I mean, I felt similarly around Embry.

He looked up from his plate and gave me a close-mouth grin, his mouth full of cheeseburger. I shoved a fork-full of chicken salad into my mouth and laughed while trying not to choke.

"So, Bells, you and Em have any plans tonight?"

"Not really-"

"Actually, we're going to La Push."

"Huh?"

"I think I'll go over myself. I haven't seen Billy in a few days."

"I don't think I want to-" Embry cut me off again by shoving a forkful of salad into my mouth. I glared as I chewed, my heart pitter-pattering as he smiled down at me.

What was he planning? Why was he being so sneaky?

My questions were answered when pulled up to his downtrodden house, which was full of light.

"What's going on?"

"I got permission from the council to use it for the night." He led me into the house with a hand on the small of my back and my heart started to pound.

As soon as we stepped through the door a loud, "SURPRISE!" thundered through the small house. Thirty of my friends and family filled the living room. Angela, Eric, and Mike sat on the couch and Lauren and Tyler stood against the wall. Emily, Seth, and Paul were in the middle of pouring drinks for people. Sam sat in a recliner. He waved a can of beer in acknowledgment and I nodded in reply.

"I'm so proud of you, Bells." Dad exclaimed as he pulled me into a tight embrace. Everyone cheered loudly. My eyes were ringing, and I couldn't stop the grin that took over my face.

"What is all of this?" I asked dad as Embry held my waist with a warm hand.

"Your graduation party."

"Wha- How-"

"Embry planned it. With help from us of course," Rachel exclaimed as she, Becca, and Angela walked over. They were all wearing matching shirts titled 'Rad Pack' and had a picture of all of us and Riley together from when they helped me on my first date with Embry.

"Riley helped too, but she had a family event and couldn't make it. She told me to give you this, though," Angela handed me a thirty-dollar gift card to Barnes&Noble. I took it gratefully, my hands shaking as my emotions ran rapid.

I turned to Embry as tears filled my eyes. He rubbed his neck bashfully, his cheeks pink.

"You did all this for me?"

"Of course. You deserve it, baby."

Even with everyone watching us, I pulled jumped and wrapped my arms and legs around Embry before kissing him passionately. He kissed me back just as wildly, holding me close.

A minute passed before dad loudly screeched, "O-okay, kiddos! Break it up!"

The party went on until midnight and then Charlie relented in letting Embry stay in my room with me. I slept better than I had in weeks with his arms wrapped around me.

If you had asked me months ago where I thought Jacob and I would be now, I wouldn't have thought here. My stomach was in tight knots of anxiety and I felt nauseous. I wouldn't be here if I hadn't had urgings from my therapist, but part of me felt a weight lift off my shoulders as I looked him over. The feelings I had were almost gone. There would probably always be a tiny piece of him in my heart, like Edward, but I wasn't in love with him. Not by a long shot.

We sat at our sacred spot on the beach, a tense silence between us. He looked tired with heavy bags under his eyes and his cheeks sucked in slightly. To put it lightly, he looked like shit.

"I know I look horrible," He said knowingly, a grim expression on his face.

"You really do."

"You don't, though."

"Hmm?"

"You look a lot better. Healthier, happier. It looks good on you." A smile spread across my lips as I thought of all the reasons why.

"Thank you…" Another tense silence set in until I blurted, "You know, It's not your fault."

"Huh?"

"My attempts. They weren't all you. It was just everything, you know? Edward and his family leaving, my friends distancing themselves. Even my mother and father have played a part."

"I set you off, though." Jacob ran a shaking hand through his hair, which had grown to his shoulders and looked unbrushed. "I came to the school when I shouldn't have. It was so wrong of me, Bells." I flinched as the nickname came from his mouth, but felt a warm feeling enter my stomach.

"No, you didn't. That was Lauren. She called me a slut."

"Aren't you good friends now?"

"Everyone has stuff going on behind the scenes. I was just the easiest target to take her pain out on."

"That doesn't make it right."

"I've done my fair share of bad things too. I led you on, for instance."

"I'm a hormonal teenage boy. It doesn't take much."

"Still, I used you to make myself feel better. When was I ever there for you? I've been dealing with my own problems, yes, but I never tried in my friendships anyway."

"Bella, you're a good person. Don't sell yourself short. I mean, you saw the good in those bloodsuckers of yours. And you fell for Embry."

"And you take care of your father and work a part time job to put food on the table, not to mention turn into a giant wolf and protect your tribe," I lay a hand on his shoulder and felt him relax. "Jake, you're a good person. You've just made bad choices lately. But you only did that because you thought I was using Embry."

"I just never understood what you saw in him." It didn't take a genius to figure out that he meant Edward.

"Em didn't either. But it was complicated… We shared similar interests. He was a bit of a nerd like me, I suppose."

"I can understand that. Leah is the only one that understands my love for tater tots… I mean, it's crunchy shaped potatoes. Kind of like a hash brown, but not." His eyes took on a glazed and happy look. That sunshine smile of his that I loved appeared on his face.

But as soon as it had appeared it was gone. "Shit, I really blew it, didn't I?"

"With Leah? Yeah, you messed up."

"I don't know why I kept arguing with her. She kept telling me to leave you alone, but I was so angry. I thought you just wanted to get back at me and use Embry in your fiendish plans. I mean, I didn't want to imprint. I hated the idea, but then it happened, and it was the best, you know? But I…"

"What?"

"I still loved you. It didn't just disappear. The feelings I had were so confusing… My head was a mess. On one hand, I wanted her so much but then you'd pop into my head and I'd feel sick to my stomach because why did I want my best friend when I had my soulmate? Shit, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."

"No, it's okay. It's good to talk about your feelings with someone."

"I still love you, I do, just not in the same way. You're my best friend and my first love, but that's all…" Tears suddenly trailed down his cheeks and he choked out a laugh. "I-I never thought it would end like this, you know? I thought one day I'd make an honest woman out of you and carry you through my doorway and make you Mrs. Bella Black."

"I-I did too… That day I caught you together… I was going to accept your feelings. I was ready to move forward, but then I all turned to shit. I was left again, and it hurt so much. The pain came back tenfold. And you didn't even care to come check up on me."

"I'm sorry, Bells."

"Let me finish please," His mouth snapped shut as he waited for me to continue. "I probably would have been better if you had explained and told me first thing, but you didn't. There's nothing that can change that. But a few weeks passed and suddenly I started hurting myself and then I came up with a plan to jump off a cliff," I swallowed and felt my anxiety rise. "Embry pulled me back when I jumped and calmed me down. He stayed with me through the night and next day. It was only after my second attempt that he told Charlie what was going on. After that, I started therapy and was doing great until that setback."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"It's a process. One blip in the grand scheme of things. I may get bad again, but I know that I have a strong support system to hold me when times get tough."

The breeze blew the smell of salt into my nose and I closed my eyes as I let good feelings wash over me.

"Let's move past this. Forgive and move forward."

"Do you think we can?"

"Yes, I do. We're Bells and Jake, right?" A cheeky grin found its way on my face and he grinned back. His hand slipped into mine and I felt a hole in my chest close up.

I've got my best friend back.

"Bells and Jake, best friends forever."

"Forever."

Embry's POV:

The last day of school. Finally.

As I exited the bane of my existence I felt a smile grace my lips.

I had all summer to spend with my lovely girlfriend. Wow, girlfriend. Bella was my girlfriend.

If I wasn't so insecure I would jump up and down and squeal.

Quickly, I slipped onto my motorcycle and started it up. As I drove out of La Push and back to Forks, I couldn't stop thinking of my girlfriend.

I'm so damn lucky, aren't I?

Seth's POV:

We were best friends. He was half-Quileute on his mother's side and stuck out like a sore thumb with his pale ass skin. He could play the guitar like a god.

And my tongue was currently down his throat as he held me against the wall behind the school, hands tangled in my long hair and teeth nipping at my bottom lip.

"Seth," Adam, my best friend, rasped out as I whined into his mouth. "Be mine."

"You really want to do this?"

"Of course, I do. I love you." We kissed some more, and his hand cupped my cheek.

"I love you too, Adam. Always have."

"Be mine?" Adam asked again, and I nodded before pulling his lips back to mine.

Third person POV:

"Sully, no! Momma said not to touch that!" Rebecca said as she pulled her son from playing in the toilet. He just cackled in reply before toddling in the other direction, no doubt trying to get into my trouble. Angela sat on the couch with Joey in her arms, running a hand through his hair. He smiled up at her as he sipped from his sippy cup, his dark eyes sleepy.

Billy sat in his recliner, snoring and dead to the world.

Angela felt warm here, holding Becca's son and listening to the background noise. This was the best background music.

As thoughts filled Angela's head, Becca entered the room again with a giggling Sully, a tired smile on her face.

Blushing, Angela turned her face towards the now sleeping boy in her arms and thought to herself, this is where I'd like to stay for a while.

Later Angela and Bella sat in the Swan living room, watching Romeo and Juliet for the second time that night.

"So, how was it?"

"How was what?"

"Hanging with Becca?"

"It was…fine," Angela said before smiling shyly. Bella caught it right away and nudged her teasingly.

"Just fine?"

"Mhm."

"Aaaalright. If you say soooo." Bella said in reply before they got lost in the movie again. Well, before Angela did. Bella's was filled with different plans on how she could get Becca and Angela together.

My best friend is going to get a girlfriend. Wow, they're going to call me freakin cupid after this.

Who would have thought that in the back of his mother's closet would be the information he'd been craving since he was five-years-old, and bullies made fun of him for not having a father.

Father….Charles Swan. Charlie, his mother had written lovingly in her journal. Charlie Swan, his dad.

There was a picture in her journal too and when he saw his eyes, he couldn't help but sob.

My eyes.

I had found him, finally. Now, I had to talk to him.

"Riley? Honey, I'm back." Victoria called as she returned from picking up his favorite Chinese takeout. Her arms were filled to the brim with food and her hair was tied in a lazy bun.

Riley didn't answer, eyes zoned in on the name. Charlie Swan.

Fuck.

"What are you doing?" She whispered darkly, and he turned around before putting a hand on his chest.

"Tori, you scared me!" He laughed but her face grew weirdly serious as she glanced at his birth certificate. "Baby, what's wrong?"

"Where did you get that?"

"I just found it. Charlie Swan is my father. My father! I've finally found him."

"I knew I should have hidden it when I had the chance." Riley's heart started to pound as her dead eyes stared down at him, blank and empty.

"W-what? Tori, what are you talking about?" Her mouth pulled back into a snarl and all at once she pounced. A crash, a scuffle.

Riley screamed.

"Tori! What are you doing! TORI!" Blood splattered onto the wall beside them.

Riley became deathly silent.

"Get back here, you little bitch!" Bree Tanner's father screamed as she shot out the door, blood dripping down her temple. She had had enough. Her mother was gone, and she had just been kicked out of school. She had nothing to lose anymore.

Bree would make a life for herself away from her mean father and be happy.

All she wanted to be was happy.

As she ran into the line of trees, she caught the eye of ruby irises.

Victoria disappeared into the shadows as she stalked her prey.