"Oh my god. Oh… MY… God. I just, I can't… Oh my god. OH MY GOD!" This was all Ginny could say since finding out that Draco was the new Head Boy. They were sitting in the Great Hall. Luna was at the Gryffindor table instead of with the other Ravenclaws.
"Ginny, that's enough. Calm down!" said Hermione.
"But.. Malfoy.. Head Boy.."
"Ginny, maybe we should change the subject for a while. Your head is full of wrackspurts. You just need to clear your mind.
Ginny looked at Luna. "But Malfoy's Head Boy!"
"Ginny, we get it. Can you please calm down now?" asked Hermione seriously, although secretly enjoying her exasperation.
Hermione looked over at Draco. He was sitting with the only other Slytherin that had returned as an eighth year; Blaise Zabini. They weren't talking. Draco was sitting with his head propped up on his arm, pushing some brussel sprouts around on his plate with his fork.
"He does seem different though, doesn't he? Like he's tired or just bored." It was true that in the prefect's compartment on the train that he didn't talk as much as he normally would have. He just sat in the shadows, letting Hermione take the lead. He wasn't his bossy self, parading around his authority over the lower years. He didn't even terrorize the new first years on the train in his usual fashion.
"Maybe the war got to him? Honestly, I don't think he wanted to fight. He looked scared when I saw him running through the castle. I got the idea that he just wanted to get out, not fight," said Neville.
"So what? You guys think he's changed? Ha, no way. He's still the same Draco-Bloody-Malfoy that he's always been. Just because he didn't run around murdering people during the battle doesn't make him a good person. Nothing's changed!" said Ginny.
"I don't think anyone's saying he's changed, Ginny," said Luna. "I think they're saying that maybe he's not as evil as we all thought."
"Well, whatever. I'm not going to be treating him any differently," said Ginny, ripping a huge piece of chicken off the bone with her teeth in a way that resembled her brother.
The four ate in silence after that. Hermione wasn't much for talking anyways. She was lost in thought. Has Malfoy changed? Or did he just have limits that he wouldn't have crossed if he hadn't had to? Could Luna be right about him not being truly evil?
Hermione hadn't noticed the golden plates and trays of food disappearing in front of her. She was only brought out of her deep thinking when McGonagall stood up and began speaking.
"Welcome back to Hogwarts, boys and girls. I'd like to say just a few words before you all head off to your dormitories to sleep off this feast." She cleared her throat and looked around for a moment before continuing.
"I'm glad to see all of you returning to Hogwarts during this sensitive period of time. The war has taken many of our number. We have all suffered great loss and misery from this battle. The brave witches and wizards who lost their lives defending our world have made the ultimate sacrifice. Because of their selflessness, our world has been made safer a safer place for us all. And let us not forget the returning staff and students amongst us who fought. We have suffered loss, yes. But we have also won this battle. Now is the time for healing and rebuilding the wizarding community to create a better future for us, and for the next generations. Together, we can get through this year and come out better."
She took another pause before wrapping up her speech. "I think that will be all for tonight. As it is Friday, we have the weekend to get acclimated to being back before classes begin Monday morning. Prefects, please escort our first years to the dorms. Good night to all."
Hermione, Ginny, Neville, and Luna got up and made their way through the crowd towards their dorms. Neville volunteered to walk Luna to the Ravenclaw tower. They said goodnight to Hermione and Ginny, and headed off. The two girls made their way up the marble staircase. When they reached the fourth floor, Hermione turned left into a narrow corridor towards her new dormitory.
"The password is 'clarity,'" she called after Ginny.
At the end of the corridor was a single door that led to the Head Boy and Girl rooms. A portrait of a motherly-looking witch with bright green eyes and brown curls pulled into a loose bun was fastened to the door, looking back at Hermione.
"Head Girl, dear?" she asked as Hermione flashed her badge at the witch. "Congratulations." Hermione heard a lock click and the door swung open. She walked in and was immediately reminded of the Gryffindor common room.
There were two couches made of black leather sitting across from each other with a coffee table between them. On the other side of the room were two squashy armchairs made of the same leather sat in a reading nook. There was a fire crackling warmly in the grate.
On either side of the mantle were two doors. The door on the left had the words 'Head Girl' emblazoned across the dark oak. To the right was a similar door with the words 'Head Boy.' Hermione walked through her door and saw that her trunk was laying at the end of her bed. Crookshanks was sleeping on the pillows, purring contentedly. She changed into her pajamas and grabbed one of her new school books, headed for the common room and settled on one of the couches in front of the fireplace, settling in for some reading before heading off to bed.
Then, the door to the common room swung open and in walked the new Head Boy, Draco Malfoy. He started walking towards into the room, rubbing his eyes as he went. He was only feet away from where Hermione sat before he looked up and realized she was there. He stopped dead in his tracks and they just stared at each other for a moment. Hermione was the first to break the silence;
"Good evening," she said stiffly.
Draco looked down. "Evening, Granger."
He sat down on the couch opposite from her. Hermione hesitated for a moment before deciding she would rather have some peace, and began getting up to head to her room.
"Granger, wait."
Hermione froze. What could Malfoy want from her?
She turned to face him, ready to defend herself from his usual verbal abuse. Instead, she was shocked to see a tired, frail looking boy starting back at her. This threw her off her guard.
"Is everything alright?" she asked cautiously.
"Can we talk?" he asked.
"About what?"
"I'd like to clear the air, since we're going to be living together for the next nine months."
"What is it? Are you going to lay out all your plans to make my life a living hell?" she asked defensively.
"Granger, you misunderstand me," said Draco with a small smile. "I just feel like I should explain some things."
Hermione was taken aback. "You don't have to explain anything to me."
"I want to," he replied.
"Okay." Hermione sat back down on the couch and crossed her arms and legs. "I'm listening."
"Well, to be honest, I'm not really who you think I am."
She waited for him to continue talking. When he didn't, she asked "and what do you mean by that? You're not Draco Malfoy? The same Draco Malfoy that's been torturing me for the last seven years? The death eater Draco Malfoy who watched his aunt torture me in his own drawing room and then try to throw me to Voldemort when she was done with me last spring?" You're not that Draco Malfoy?"
He winced at 'death eater,' but showed no other signs of discomfort. "Yes, I'm obviously that Draco Malfoy," he said patiently. "What I mean is that I don't really care about the things I've pretended to care about for years. I've had these expectations that I've had to live up to. I knew from a young age that Voldemort would make a comeback. My father was always telling me what an honor it would be to join him when that happened. I've had to be who I was expected to be; pureblood, proud, better. But I never believed that. You know who my family is.. Bellatrix, my father… they were right in his good books. Bellatrix was his right hand man. I've had to be this person that they wanted me to be. I've tried standing up to them in the past, but there were… consequences." Draco stared off in silence for a moment before continuing. "I've done some regrettable things in my past to protect myself from my family. But the truth is that I don't care about blood status. I don't care about money. I don't care about… any of it. I won't blame you if you don't believe me or can't forgive me. Hell, I wouldn't forgive me. But I really hope this year we can start over. I'd like to be better."
Hermione was shocked. "This is a really disgusting joke, Malfoy. If you think for a second–"
"It's no joke. I can understand why you think that. But I really feel awful for the way I've treated you. I hope that I can show you that I'm not that person."
"I really don't know what to say." Hermione was having a hard time finding words. "So… you're sitting here, telling me that this person that you say you've been pretending to be…"
"Isn't the real me," he finished. "I'm not going to say that I love Potter and Weasley. But this silly childhood rivalry has nothing to do with blood status, or who was on whose side during the war. It just came from the way things were. When I tried befriending Potter before the sorting, that was real. And I've never hated you. Well, actually I did for a few weeks during our third year after you decked me in the nose." Draco gave a small smile.
Hermione smiled back at that. "Yeah, well.. You deserved that one. You were being horrible about Hagrid and Buckbeak."
"Yeah, I really did have my moments." Draco sounded ashamed. "But now that the war is over and I can finally be my own person, I'm ready to live the life I want to. I'm ready to make amends. And I want to try to clear my name. I know that it will take time, and convincing, and a real effort. But I'm willing to put in the work."
"So, you were just pretending to hate Harry, Ron, and me? You were just pretending to hate muggleborns this whole time?"
"Don't get me wrong, I really don't like Potter and Weasley. But as for muggleborns? No, I don't hate them for being muggleborn."
Hermione uncrossed her legs and stared at her feet for a long while. Could this really be true? she thought. It was so bizarre and uncharacteristic. But at the same time, it seemed to be the most obvious thing in the world.
Malfoy was watching her closely. She was quiet for so long. Finally, he broke the silence. "Do you believe me, even a little?"
Hermione looked up, startled to see Malfoy sitting across from her. She had been so deep in her own thoughts that she had completely forgotten he was there. "Actually, the crazy thing is that I want to. But Malfoy, you've been really awful to me and my friends. I don't know if I really can."
Malfoy looked relieved. He smiled before talking again. "I know I've got a lot to prove and a lot to make up for. I'm really glad you haven't just written me off though. I promise, I'm going to try to make things right. I'm going to prove to you and everybody who I really am." He stood up. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'd really just like to go to bed. I feel like I haven't slept in a year. And I've got to have my energy to bully all the first years tomorrow," he winked.
He got up and began walking towards his room. Hermione said, "good night, ferret." Draco turned and smirked at her. "Night, Granger." And with that, he disappeared into his room and didn't come back out until morning.