Fiona looked around the ballroom. It was lit in a soft orange glow making everything feel golden. The music was soft and hummed throughout the giant room. Closest to the stage was the dancing area, tables and empty spaces for those mingling spread out in perfect patterns surrounding it. Despite being surrounded by so many people, namely humans, it radiated a sense of comfort to the princess. She had long long ago memories of evening balls, they were fuzzy at best, over time she wondered if they were even real or just the recollection of a childhood dream. There had been afternoon parties, or events that began a few hours before sunset that she could attend at least some of. But nothing felt as awesome as those past nightfall. It was something about the peace the night sky brought, mixed with the spectacular glow of the many candles.
She watched as people gathered with each other in groups, others danced. She had danced herself, though her children seemed far less willing to dance with her than they had in previous years. Fiona had been called off of the dance floor to speak with people, which she happily did - as was her duty. Her favourite time of the night was yet to come; when people started filtering out, the children had been put to bed, and she could drop some responsibilities. There were a couple more hours until the kids would be taken to their rooms, and another beyond that before enough of the crowd would leave.
The ogress had taken a moment of peace. No one was left sitting on the raised area specifically for the royals. She had taken her seat, just to watch and take in the event. She closed her eyes, tapping her foot to the rhythmic tempo of the music.
"Fiona." Lillian approached her, breaking her daze. Her mother's eyes were sparkling. "The reporter wants to speak to Felicia."
Fiona immediately looked over to where the reporters were huddled. There was an area in the corner for them. A man with a microphone stood in front of a rather impressive camera setup. A tapestry was hung behind him. A small group of people were gathered around him, watching - and occasionally squealing at - the various important people he interviewed. They had followed everyone arriving and seemed incredibly interested in everyone's nonsensical business. Shrek had questioned it, like he did every time. It was simply what was done. It connected those who ran the kingdom with the people it inhabited. She had always known this.
"Felicia?" Fiona couldn't hide her surprise.
"Yes. She looks lovely tonight, doesn't she?" Lillian complimented her granddaughter again.
After finding out about the ball they were to attend, Felicia made the compelling point that they were thirteen now, they should get to choose what they wear. Fiona had agreed on the condition that it was royal attire, they were not allowed to follow in their father's footsteps just yet. They had already been allowed to wear their regular clothes for visits to Far Far Away, except for events. Farkle had complained about Felicia's bargaining; he wasn't interested in picking out royal clothes. Fergus also claimed to not care, except he had some very specific instructions that he couldn't match his siblings, in clothing colour or style. Her daughter, however, had made some surprising decisions about her appearance. She chose a deep blue gown, with a grey pattern on the bodice. Blue wasn't a colour she had been dressed in, whether that be regular clothes or the fancy kind. She had also insisted her hair be left loose, a contrast to having Fiona sweep it up into a ponytail, or sometimes the stylists would braid her hair to match Fiona's. Of course, a compromise had to be made with a blue bow, pulling the hair from her face away to the back of her head - half up, half loose, she had begrudgingly accepted.
Fiona had teared up, needing to clandestinely wipe her eyes, when she saw her daughter. It was a moment she had forgotten she was excited for. It was enough for Felicia to even get a little excited for the ball. They did take after their father in that respect; the beauty of the event didn't strike them in the same way it did Fiona.
"They're speaking to a lot of the young ladies here today. They want to speak to the princess," Lillian explained.
"Oh." Fiona found herself surprised again. The reporters often left out her family. It wasn't something that bothered her… on the most part. They often enjoyed being left alone. The princess searched the crowd again to find her family. She spotted them. Felicia was twirling around in her dress, the boys were laughing. Artie had just stranded Shrek in the middle of everything. Her husband was looking at her. They met each other's gaze, he was most probably silently wishing for her to come to his rescue.
"We shall have to show her pictures from your interviews." Her mother was smiling gently at her. It was a shared understanding.
"Yours too," Fiona added. It was the newest generation of princesses' turn.
The ogress headed out into the waves of people to reach her family. The excitement rushed over her. She supposed her mother would have far more interviews and photos to reminisce on. Fiona only had a few, but she remembered them to be fun. She would twirl in front of reporters, curtsey, and blush as they complimented her. She was even younger than her daughter, but she was asked very simple questions. Fiona had never considered this much for Felicia, but against her forgotten expectations, it was happening!
Moving through the crowd was easy, everyone always sidestepped quickly for her. Much like they did for Artie. She ignored the eyes that followed her - always seemed to follow her - across the room. She was met with her husband, relief in his eyes. She assumed he'd want them to swap places. This time she had to disappoint him.
"They want to speak to Felicia!" Fiona tried to speak above the music without shouting.
"Wha-?" was the response.
Fiona raised her eyebrows, she knew he heard her. "They want-"
"Me?" came the excited squeak of her daughter.
"No." Shrek shook his head, interrupting any confirmation Fiona was about to make. "Them?" He threw a thumb in the direction of the reporters, gaining a nod from his wife. "She's not doing that. Yer not doing that."
"Why?" Felicia was quick to protest.
"Don't listen to him," she addressed her daughter directly. "Of course you can!" The ogresses beamed at each other.
Fiona took her daughter's hand and led her away from the middle of the fuss.
"What do I say?" Felicia asked eagerly.
She pulled a lock of hair over Felicia's shoulder. "You answer their questions. Remember what you've been taught." Fiona's eyes lit up, realising she'd been waiting for this moment. The moment she could brief her own daughter on a reporter. Sure the triplets had been placed in front of reporters before, but it was typically with herself. This was new territory for them. A lot later than it had been for her, but Felicia wasn't the heir, nor did they live at the castle. It was Fiona's turn to be proud. "You'll do great. You have to be smart and brave, and yourself."
Felicia pushed off Fiona's hand. "I know." She turned towards the reporter, he smiled invitingly at her. Heads turned. "What will they ask?" The nerves seemed to hit her.
"I don't know. Honey, you'll be fine. They'll be nice to you," she assured as she always did. Fiona pushed her gently, forcing her into movement.
"Why do they want to speak to me?" Felicia whispered as she moved towards them. Fiona could barely hear it above the event. Her daughter walked slowly.
"Grandma says they're speaking to all of the young ladies here," she responded.
Felicia swivelled on her heels, eyes wide. "I'm a young lady?" There was a hint of humour in her voice, but the hesitation seemed to front.
"Of course, you're the princess," she lightly reassured her, throwing an exaggerated glance to the reporter station. "And you look especially beautiful tonight."
Felicia considered her for a moment, before turning and continuing her walk to the people who awaited her. Fiona followed. She recalled her mother standing aside, listening to her own interviews. Sometimes she would be critiqued for an answer, but it was mostly in pride.
"What's she doing?" Shrek was suddenly behind her as Felicia was separated into the hot seat. It startled Fiona, she glanced back at him, shooting him a glare. Her husband's skepticality wasn't going to ruin the moment for her and her daughter. She smiled at Felicia as she caught her nervous gaze.
Felicia dipped into a curtsey as they formally greeted her. It was bouncy and quick. Not the gentle glide she was trained in. Fiona knew she could do it, she had done it earlier when the ball had begun. Felicia had curtseyed to so many people as the night went on, and she was nervous. If anything it was endearing. Fiona smiled at her again. It wasn't like they expected perfection from her child anyway. That was a perk that came with the species.
"How are you enjoying this evening?"
First question was easy enough.
"It's wonderful. I love the music. Everyone is so good at dancing." Felicia landed the answer. Fiona only hoped they wouldn't ask Felicia about her own dancing.
"Yes, yes. Exactly. It's quite impressive, eh?"
Felicia nodded in response. It was an invitation to elaborate, but no matter. The reporter would need to ask another question.
"What a ballroom, huh?"
Fiona raised her eyebrows at her, hoping to catch her gaze. Silently encouraging her to speak more.
"Yes!" Felicia didn't look toward her mother, instead she looked out to the vast ballroom. She scanned the whole room, then craned her neck to look up at the intricate ceiling. The action wasn't the most princess-like, but that didn't matter. The interviewer looked up with her. Fiona quieted the voice.
"I suppose that's very different to what you're used to."
Hm. The ogress couldn't help but dampen her smile. It was territory she didn't expect. She certainly didn't want Felicia to be prompted to speak about their home life. Fiona didn't care to look at what the common folk gossiped about her and her family, but at the same time she didn't want to fuel anything either. They liked their privacy. The hand she didn't realise was resting on her lower back seemed to tense up. She glanced back at her husband again; he was staring intently at his daughter, brow furrowed.
"Well…" Felicia gave a glance to her parents, smirking. "It is a little different to back home. But we stay here all the time, I'm used to it!"
The man laughed. "Yes, of course. We all know you visit."
Fiona let go of the breath she had been holding. She exhaled a small laugh of her own.
"It's a beautiful kingdom!" Felicia exclaimed. That was something she had been taught to do; praise the kingdom whenever given the opportunity. Fiona could feel her heart swelling with pride. The younger ogress seemed to ease up with her response.
"Ah, beautiful. I agree, I agree. I'm sure everyone else could agree too." He looked to the small crowd around him. Everyone smiled, vocalising their opinion. "Princess, let me ask you one more question…" he spoke clearly.
Felicia nodded. The man smirked before he physically wiped it off of his face with a slight hand movement. Fiona's brow furrowed - the last question was often the hardest.
"It really is a beautiful ballroom, in a beautiful kingdom. Tell us… tonight…" He gestured to her. "...do you feel…" The man turned to the camera lens, exaggerated in his head movement. "Beautiful?"
Fiona's world suddenly fell silent, but not enough to block out the low sniggered laughter the immediate crowd made. Felicia's eyes suddenly found her. Despite doing so well before, the hesitant smile was gone. Shrek began to move - move forward to retrieve her. The ogress grabbed onto him, pausing his movement. Fiona did the only thing she could, she forced a smile onto her own face and nodded exaggeratedly at her daughter. Yes. She willed her to say it. Her daughter was beautiful, and Felicia had made it clear enough that she thought so to her family.
Felicia hesitantly looked back towards the man with a microphone in her face. She tugged the corners of her lips upward, nodding hesitantly. "Yes."
"Well you heard it here folks, Princess Felicia feels the most beautiful tonight! Take a look, tell us what you think!"
Felicia was looking desperately toward her again, brow furrowed, faded smile frozen on her face. Fiona felt herself on autopilot, she raised her eyebrows, twirling a finger in the air. Felicia had been twirling since she put on the dress. It would deflect the comment, it would show confidence, it would… Fiona's brain suddenly quietened as she realised her daughter didn't care to twirl for them. Felicia's eyes were welling up with tears, she stared at her mother.
"Okay, she's done," Shrek mumbled, pushing past Fiona's feeble barricade.
Fiona didn't stop him as he barged into the offender. "Time ta go!" He firmly took his child by her shoulders and steered her out of the spotlight.
The mother hurried after them. She barely threw a glance back to the reporter. It vaguely registered within her that their exit was blunt. It didn't matter. Bluntness was what they deserved.
Felicia wriggled her way from her father's grip and walked away from them, fast. Fiona was about to take off after her, but Shrek didn't let her shoulder past him. His mouth was sewn in a firm line, he was angry. Of course he was angry. His skepticism had been proven right. She was angry too, she would have to speak to her mother and Artie about it. Shrek glanced at her. "This is why ya didn't wanna be queen, right?" He spoke in a low voice. "Ye didn't want this t'happen."
It was enough to give her pause.
"Dad! Can we go outside?" Farkle's voice barely registered in her mind.
"Go get yer sister and we'll go." Shrek threw Fiona a glare. "Where's ye brother?" He addressed his son. Leaving her where she stood.
He was mad at her.
He was right. It was too late; talking to her mother, Artie, anyone, it didn't matter. The damage had been done. Fiona would fight a bear if it meant protecting her children. She was fearless. But she couldn't protect her child now. Not from those humans. She had once almost stormed out of her own wedding ball, she almost left in the middle of the night during a storm, she refused to take any professional help with the triplet pregnancy and infant care to stop them being raised in a castle. Where did that person go?
Fiona looked back to the reporter and the crowd. They had moved on. Tearing down a child was nothing to them. It wasn't like what was stored in her memories. Everyone always used to show so much respect, the crowd would coo at her and be awestruck of her. That's because they truly did believe she was beautiful, she reminded herself. It was different. Her childhood in that very ballroom was so different. She scanned the room for her daughter. She had found her way back up the steps to where the throne was, where the royal family were seated. She shooed away her brother, sitting by herself. Her arms were folded across her middle, hands clasped onto her forearms.
Things had just been so good. They had worked out a strange harmony with everyone in Far Far Away. Sure, there were comments and looks, but it was nothing special, nothing new. Why would that change?
She slowly began walking over to her forlorn daughter. She had to fix it. She needed her daughter to know how beautiful she really was, how the room lit up when she smiled. From the very second she was born, her parents had their breaths taken away by her. She couldn't allow her daughter to feel the way she did about herself.
"Honey, look at how beautiful you are." Fiona smiled at her as she took a seat beside her. "You know better than to listen to them." She threw a thumb in their direction, watching her daughter hopefully. Felicia didn't meet her gaze, she didn't even try to smile back. She was deflated, slumped in the seat. She had ripped the bow from her hair, allowing it to fall forward and curtain her face.
Fiona lifted a lock of her hair to move it from her face and Felicia shook her off. "Leave me alone," she mumbled.
Perhaps Fiona was too late. The mother didn't move from her seat, but she clasped her hands together, falling into silence. Her eyes naturally picked out her sons, they were with their father. Making their way towards the courtyard. The boys looked like they were invested in a conversation with each other, clandestinely pointing at people around the room, sharing sniggers back and forth. The world was different for them. Sure, people doubted them, in the never ending underestimation humans seemed to have for ogres in general. People made their comments when backs were turned and stared in equal measure, she knew all of this. However, their physical appearance wasn't scrutinised under the same magnifying glass as their sister. Princesses were held to different standards than princes. Felicia was scored by her grace, poise and beauty, something she didn't get high marks for in the judgemental human gaze. Fergus and Farkle excelled in their strength and swordsmanship. They were both thrilled retelling the stories of how people gasped at the distance they could throw their javelins at. Of course, Felicia excelled at those physical things too, sometimes over her brothers, but no one but her parents particularly cared about that.
Despite everything, her children didn't care too much about how they were perceived. They were in Far Far Away for short bursts of time. Herself and her husband always did their best to shoot down any remarks made. Shrek had always told them that ogres were proud to be ugly. The uglier the better even. Except, it didn't quite work for them. Fiona knew that by ogre standards, she wasn't ugly at all. In fact the logic almost looped back around on itself and made her ugly all over again. But at their age, it didn't matter too much. It never seemed to matter too much. Perhaps it had started seeping through the cracks.
"I'm sorry," Fiona spoke softly. Fiona wanted to tell her about how she was kept away from the world for that very reason. She wanted to explain her thought processes around not living in the castle or being in this royal world all of the time. But… her daughter was thirteen and heartbroken because of the situation she was thrown into. None of Fiona's explanations or excuses would do anything now. "You were very brave. You answered everything perfectly." She gave the debrief she was once excited to do in a sullen voice.
Felicia didn't respond, she didn't acknowledge the older ogresses' presence. Her daughter was probably mad at her too. She supposed it was reasonable to expect a parent to protect you, rather than encourage you into a situation that ended up leaving a sting. She supposed they could relate to each other in that way. Fiona blinked her thought process quiet. That wasn't fair. Her own parents did protect her. As much as Fiona detested being locked away in her room every night, it worked. Her parents managed to keep her from the hurt her daughter was feeling. Fiona's memories of the kingdom and its people remained rose coloured and cheery. Which led her right into this trap.
Fiona sighed to herself. She allowed the music to filter back into her consciousness as the song changed. It was upbeat and quick. The melody had her tapping her foot, watching the giddy dancers. It almost felt selfish to allow herself to enjoy the ball considering what Felicia was feeling. She couldn't help but be brought back to her childhood room, standing with her elongated ear pressed against the crack of the door, listening to any wisps of the ball that made its way up to her bedroom. She would wonder whether her parents were enjoying themselves without her, wondering if they would watch any children at the event and wish she could be there with them. Her conclusions varied depending on her mood. Fiona realised in that moment that her parents most probably tried to block the feelings out, and enjoy what they could of the event despite her desperate longing. If her child wasn't sitting right beside her, perhaps she could pretend it didn't happen too. Alas, she was rooted to her chair. She couldn't abandon her daughter, even if they sat in silence for the rest of the ball.
Her gaze drifted to the reporters, a new girl in the hot seat being questioned. The girl twirled, Fiona could hear the faint cooing of the crowd. A frown took over her face, she was glad Felicia was staring intently at the ground. The mother began painting an argument in her mind. How she would love to go and shove a finger into his chest and reprimand him. She was thirteen and she is beautiful. Who was he to speak to the princess like that? The fantasy seemed to jolt energy within her, enough for her to brace her arms to stand-
"Ye wanna go outside?"
Her husband's voice startled her. In all of her rage induced daydreams, she had missed the spectacle of the ogre making his way across the room once more.
Felicia didn't respond.
"Ye don't wanna get up?" Shrek asked her, gesturing out to the crowds. Fiona could tell he was trying. Shrek would take any excuse to sit on the sidelines and zone out. "No?" he prompted from the lack of response. He sat down on her other side. "Yah, if I were wearing that, I wouldn't either. It looks heavy."
Fiona sprung him a glare, opened her mouth to chastise him-
"No it's not!"
The older ogress sat back in her chair. Her husband threw her a glance. He had it under control.
"Really?"
Felicia punched him in the gut. "I'm strong enough."
"Oh aye." He chuckled. Not even sparing a flinch at her action.
They lapsed into silence. He got her to speak, that was something. Fiona resisted the urge to fill the quiet, to continue trying to fix things. There were times where the children needed space and their own thoughts - something she had learned the hard way.
Shrek leaned down just a little, still looking out at the room in front of them. His voice was low, "Yanno when yer out and a group of humans appear an' they've got a couple sticks t'poke ya with, maybe a torch or two…"
Felicia looked up at him, her attention captured.
"Ye know what I told ye about bein' scary and confident before ya even get spotted by 'em?"
She nodded at him. She was as confused as Fiona was, trying to connect the dots.
"Go on…" He nodded at her to demonstrate her learning.
Their daughter pointed to her head. "You've gotta get scary up here first."
"Yah, exactly. Ye gotta feel scary an' confident t'be scary an' confident. And then those humans will think yer scary. Right?"
She nodded again, eyes trailing down to the ground as the dots connected in her mind. She didn't want to be having a conversation about it but it was too late. Fiona was as surprised as Felicia was disappointed at his tact.
"Well…" Shrek continued pressing her. "How did ya feel when ya put that dress on? That is what you are."
Felicia focused hard on the ground, curiosity wiped from her face. She didn't respond.
"So when one of those guys asks ye how ye feel, you tell 'em." He gave her a slight nudge. "If ye feel it, get ye mindset in place, and you tell 'em right… They'll get the message."
She didn't move her gaze, but her expression softened.
"It's the same logic." He shrugged. "Those humans couldn't tell a stink that comes from their own fart." His words brought a smile onto her face. He leaned closer to her. "Thas a secret we ogres know. They didn't learn that, ask yer mother."
"That's how we can use it against them." Felicia met his gaze.
"Exactly." He sat back in his seat, his daughter now engaged in the conversation. "As soon as ye feel the way they want ya t'feel-"
"You're toast." She giggled.
"Aye. An' not the good kind." They smiled at one another for a small moment. "Yanno, some guys like that once told me I wasn't scary." He shrugged again, trying to maintain an air of nonchalance.
Felicia's eyes widened. "What?"
"Aye. An' can ya believe that I believed 'em."
"Really?"
"Yah." He scoffed, throwing a thumb at himself. "I'm the scariest guy I know."
"You're the scariest guy I know too!"
Fiona almost jumped in with her own agreement but held her tongue. This wasn't her conversation. She'd already dug a hole so far, she worried she'd never get out.
"Ye didn't answer me before, how did ya feel when you put on that dress?" He flicked at her skirt, making a mock disgusted face, making her swipe at him and giggle.
The small laughter was short lived as she realised she needed to respond. Felicia became self-conscious again. She shrugged. "I don't know… pretty?" she offered.
"Yah, yer beautiful," he complimented her. "An' if ye know that, and show that. Just like bein' scary. They'll all see it."
"Really?" She was unconvinced.
"Really really."
Their daughter's eyes trailed away again. She didn't look back at the ground, she looked out to the crowd, scanning it. Fiona followed her gaze to find the reporters again. She imagined her daughter figuring out how to redo the situation, giving them a piece of her mind. It seemed she was growing into quite the opinionated, stubborn ogress. The humans in the kingdom that called them royalty seemed to stifle it. Well, Fiona found herself stifling it. Not that it wasn't unwarranted. They really couldn't be as free spirited in front of the people who expected some level of perfection. It wasn't just about them, it was about their extended family too. That was why Fiona didn't want them to be raised in a castle. Sure, they would vacation to visit their family and need to dress up and play royalty every now and again, but they could be themselves the rest of the time. Fiona knew all too well that it would have been the reverse had she chosen to stay.
Fiona suddenly caught her daughter throwing her a glance. The mother sucked in a breath to apologise, though Shrek pointed out her brothers, capturing her attention again "No point in letting 'em know they ruined yer day. Go get ye brothers and cause mischief or whatever ye get up to."
Fiona met his eye.
"Don't tell ye mother I said that." He chuckled at her.
Felicia smirked, glancing again at Fiona. She lifted herself from the seat and hopped down the steps away from them. Yes. Fiona had dug her hole. They could talk about it in private later. Or… she could consult with her husband on what to do. That was certainly something different.
"Thank you…" Fiona smiled at him gratefully. "I'm not sure I could've fixed that."
"Well… ye forget the most important part. She's an ogre princess. She knows a little more than all the other ones."
. . .
Some parents have a little habit of living vicariously through their children. Being locked in a tower from a young age is probably gonna make someone more susceptible to doing that. I love Fiona but Felicia is gonna have mommy issues for sure.
This chapter had many forms while it was in progress and I absolutely didn't expect the wholesome outcome. Some of this was somewhat inspired by The Jig is Up by fauxgre - thank you for pointing out Fiona's love of music and ballrooms.
I hope everyone enjoyed :)
Please leave a review! I know there are some essay reviewers among us here, but don't feel like you need to leave an essay if you don't have one. If you have a thought, even if it's one sentence, I'd love to hear it!
Thanks for reading!
