Hey!

Quick warning for vomiting and nausea in this chapter, but nothing graphic. Also, references to chapter 17's events.

Enjoy!

Chapter 19 – Secrecy

From the second Loona made her presence known, she knew it was a mistake.

For her defense, she hadn't realized they were in Stolas' bedroom, she had just pushed the door open as soon as she heard them. There wasn't any evidence left of what happened earlier, even in the air, Stolas had made sure of it. But the owl was obviously not fine when she arrived, and Blitz was very oblivious about it.

She tried to act normally, and Blitz bought it with no problem, but Stolas… Stolas wouldn't meet anyone's eyes, and she could smell his unease. He definitely didn't tell Blitz what happened, and didn't seem to be fine about it either. Which… Fair, it definitely happened here even if most of the smell was gone. The balcony doors were still wide open, and there were candles lit up at several points, probably to cover up any lingering scent.

Stolas was quick to retreat to his bathroom with the excuse to change, but his gaze briefly met Loona's, and she suddenly smelt fear just before the door closed.

That was… Weird. Why did he look scared of her? It wasn't… Oh shit, was it because he was assaulted by hellhounds, and she reminded him of them?

"Is there a problem Loony?"

Blitz's voice cut her thoughts. She only realized now he hadn't followed the owl, which was probably best for Stolas, and blinked.

"Why?" She asked, defensive.

"Well, you look tense." He dropped his voice, like if he wanted to make sure the prince wouldn't be able to hear. "Do you… Smell anything weird on Stolas? He didn't overdo it today, right?"

Shit. She didn't want to tell him. It wasn't her place to. But the Goetia has been reluctant to share his problems with them from the start, so he probably wouldn't bring it up on his own. She decided to go for a half truth.

"He's still healing, from what I can tell, but… I don't know. It's more than that."

She wasn't even referring to his abnormal stress levels, there was truly something else in his smell, now that she was truly paying attention. She couldn't smell the owl himself, but he was here recently enough that she could sense something was off. Something… That has probably been here for a while, but she just never really paid attention. It was here this morning, when he joined them in the human world, during the previous sleepover, even when he came to IMP. It was…

The bathroom door opened and Stolas joined them, more composed but still not as calm as usual.

"Sorry for the wait! Let's join Via so we can decide together, shall we?"

The hellhound took the opportunity to smell him blatantly, and Stolas' stress level skyrocketed again, so she decided to stop quickly for his sake.

"Have you eaten today?" She asked instead.

The owl blinked, clearly not expecting that question.

"What?"

"Really Stolas, you're recovering and you're not eating?! What are you thinking?" Blitz immediately reacted without waiting for a confirmation.

"Ah, uh, sorry, I didn't mean to! It's just, I got up late, and got sidetracked, ha ha…"

"That's not funny asshole! Wait here, I'll grab some snacks, you eat them, and then we can join Via to start the evening! You hear me?"

"Are you sure? We're about to order food…"

"Not quick enough! Don't move! Loona, tell Via we'll join her in a few minutes!"

"Sure da… Blitz!"

He sent her a bright smile before leaving the room in a hurry. Loona didn't think he'd react that way, but she decided not to let such an opportunity pass. She turned toward Stolas, crossing her arm to give herself a bit more confidence. It wasn't her place to do this, but she felt like she had to try.

"So. Are you going to tell Blitz or not?"

The owl, who had relaxed a bit, tensed again.

"Wha… What do you mean?"

Ok, so straightforward she would be.

"I know what happened to you today. Why not tell Blitz? From what I understand, he's trying to help you."

Stolas was frozen, horrified. "How…"

"Your bed sheets from earlier are still in the laundry room. Guess they didn't have time to clean them today."

It wasn't the right thing to say, obviously, as the owl only seemed to crumble even more before her.

"Sorry, I… You shouldn't have seen… Smelt that."

"Yeah, well, I probably shouldn't have pried into it. But it's obvious you tried to erase all evidence of it here. Why can't you just tell Blitz? You're obviously shaken, even more so than from your wounds…"

Concern was appearing in her voice despite her tough persona, and it helped put Stolas a bit more at ease, but he vehemently shook his head.

"Please. Don't tell anyone."

"I won't, it's just…"

She could hear footsteps coming their way. Blitz was already back. She turned her head toward the door, and Stolas did the same, as the assassin burst in.

"Here! It's not much, but you better eat it all, understood?" The small demon said as he handed Stolas a few mice and some snacks akin to granola bars. "Tell me you didn't forget to drink too?"

"I didn't, but…"

"Let me grab you a glass of water just to be sure!" The imp added as he rushed to get the one on the bedside table to go and fill it.

Stolas blinked, then watched the food in his hands.

He couldn't. He… He didn't want to eat anything right now. Owls tend so swallow things whole, and the last thing that has been in his mouth…

He shuddered, putting the memories away while trying to conceal his emotions, and his stare met Loona's. She looked empathetic, but it wasn't really helping, on the contrary.

He didn't know if he would be able to go through the evening, especially if they were going to stay together. The fact Loona knew, and how she had found out, was piling up on top of everything else, and he was so close to completely loosing his shit.

Then Blitz was back with the water, frowning.

"Don't tell me you don't like these? The mice aren't good? It's what you eat usually, right?"

"Yes, yes!" Stolas quickly composed himself, trying to smile.

The imp was eyeing him suspiciously. Now that he thought about it, it was true the owl didn't eat much yesterday evening, and… He didn't eat this morning either, saying he'd take his own breakfast later, since they all left early for a Saturday.

"Then go ahead, eat and drink so we can join your daughter!"

Without thinking, the prince obeyed, eating everything as quickly as he could and gulping down the water to push everything down, trying not to think about it. Blitz went to put the glass back, and they all finally went to the living room.

Both Loona and Blitz were casting him worried glances, but he was doing his best to ignore it. Maybe if he acted normally, they wouldn't ask questions. He could feel the imp was about to speak, but then they entered the living room, and Via was quick to distract them all.

"Finally! I was thinking Loona managed to get you all lost!"

"Come on, I can't get lost in my own house!" Stolas laughed.

"You, maybe, but Blitz and Loona can."

The owlet had already grabbed snacks for everyone on her own since they were so long, and Voxflix was opened on the screen. They started to prepare for the evening. Stolas choose a comfy armchair next to the couch, to make sure no one would press on his wounds by accident, since they were still quite sore even with the painkillers. But as much as he was trying to compose himself in front of his daughter, glad for the distraction offered by the other two, he could feel the nausea growing.

Eating also reminded him of what he had to swallow earlier that day, and… No, he couldn't avoid the memory completely. Under the pretense of grabbing enough cash to prepare for the delivery guy, that Blitz proposed to meet once they were there, he slipped away, making sure no one was following him before emptying his stomach in the first more or less suitable container he could find.

Luckily, said container was a trash can with a lid, in a room no one should enter by the time the staff would be back to empty it, so it should be fine. Then, he used a portal to retrieve his money, and got back to the living room.

No one seemed to suspect a thing, not that he really met anyone's eyes when he returned to his seat, taking advantage of how everyone seemed to be lost in an animated discussion to choose what to order and what to watch. He hoped he would be forgotten, but of course Blitz turned toward him to ask what he wanted to eat, and he had no choice but pick something up. He went for something simple he could actually eat if he felt like it, and he knew Blitz was getting suspicious, but hopefully he would have forgotten about it by the end of the evening.

It went like this for the whole evening. Stolas was in his own bubble, not really following what was happening around. He wasn't pondering about anything either. No, he was just… There. But not really. He didn't want to think about what was going on, because he failed to stay away from Blitz tonight, but if he avoided thinking about it, maybe he wouldn't panic.

The others were chatting rather animatedly to pick up a show to watch while waiting for the food to arrive. Stolas would vaguely answer when asked something, but didn't really talk otherwise, and said he was simply tired and enjoying seeing them all getting along, which was true.

Once the food was there and the show started, there was less chatting. People were still reacting to what they were watching, but he felt like his silence would go unnoticed more easily that way. He even managed to drop his food discreetly through a portal hidden from the other's eyes so no one would notice he wasn't eating, but even if his face was turned toward the screen, he wasn't really following anything.

"Hey dad, are you okay?"

Stolas blinked, and realized the screen was paused in between two episodes. He turned toward Octavia's worried glance.

"I'm fine Via, why do you ask?"

"It's just that, you're usually a good audience when we watch shows or movies, but tonight you're really… Quiet? I don't think I've heard any comment from you. Are you enjoying the show? I'm sure we can still change if you really don't like it."

"Oh no no, don't worry! I just don't feel very energetic tonight. As long as you are all enjoying yourselves, it's perfect."

He was trying to offer them a reassuring smile, but even Blitz and Loona's faces were showing concern.

They were sharing the couch, he was the only one aside, despite said couch being big enough for the four of them. He was also wrapped up in a blanket, which was common for him when he was watching TV, but usually it was just on his shoulders.

Octavia shared a look with Loona, who shrugged, and she decided not to press it.

"Ok, if you're sure…"

They all focused back on the show, excited to see what would happen next, and Stolas simply floated back in his mind, not paying attention to anything. As long as the reactions were positive, even through annoyance, that was all that mattered. He couldn't even remember what show they were watching, despite having his eyes glued on the screen.

The three on the couch acted like if everything was normal, enjoying the show as much as they could, until Blitz decided it was getting late and everyone should go to bed. Usually, he'd wait much later for that, and would probably need someone to drag him to bed, but even if he tried to distract Via from her dad, he knew she had noticed his strange behavior. They all had, even if they did their best to ignore it.

It got Blitz worried, and it was weird to admit it even to himself. Stolas had acted like usual earlier, and he couldn't place exactly when his mood dropped down. He was so worried not to find the owl at first that he lowered his guard too fast afterward, and had probably missed a few hints, and now he felt bad for it.

He shouldn't have pushed for this evening, Stolas wasn't thrilled from the start. He was so sure it would cheer him up, but maybe it had the opposite effect.

Everyone wished each other a good night, and then the girls were out. Blitz managed to convince Stolas to go ahead without him, since he seemed so tired, and took care of all the empty boxes and trash from their dinner.

As he was grabbing Stolas', he noticed that the sauce leaked in a strange direction, like if the content had been emptied somewhere. The disposable cutlery that came with the food was perfectly clean, obviously untouched, and Blitz took a few seconds processing what that meant.

There was too much for Stolas to just drop everything in his mouth to swallow, so he probably didn't eat. He faked it while no one was watching, and he had missed it. Did that mean he hadn't eaten the snacks earlier? No, no, he had done so before him and Loona. Maybe it was enough for him, since he didn't eat much yesterday too? He didn't seem to want to order when he was asked, but probably did so his daughter wouldn't worry. Still, if it was all he ate today, and he wasn't even hungry, it was concerning. Except if royals could survive without food or something? But he didn't think it was the case.

He hesitated, and decided he'd bring it up tomorrow at breakfast, especially if the owl tried to skip it. For now, from what Loona told him from Stolas' scent, he really needed to sleep too. Not that the bags under his eyes weren't proof on their own, but Blitz tended to forget about these, with how good Stolas was at concealing them with make up.

For now, better not stress him out before bed. But it seemed like Stolas was afraid of what the imp would bring up anyway, because when Blitz returned to the bedroom, the owl was already in bed, curled up on himself, pretending to be asleep.

Well, the assassin wasn't 100% sure, but he was like 95% sure it was fake.

Still, he didn't want to be stressful. So he stripped, and hesitantly got in bed. Stolas was on his side of the bed, and his position wasn't really an invitation, more like a way to say he wanted to be left alone. Which was weird, because even with his injuries, he hadn't minded Blitz being close yesterday night, on the contrary.

He had managed to whisper with Loona before she left with Via, and she had confirmed Stolas was still hurt and in pain, but not excessively so. The bandages were still there, and even if the prince walked like usual, Blitz couldn't help but notice he hadn't used his right arm much tonight, despite being right handed. So yeah, definitely still healing.

The imp decided to lay down close but without touching, just in case, and started purring slowly. He stayed like that for a while, observing the prince, wanting to reach out but not daring to. Finally, the tension he could see in his frame seemed to go away, and only then, Blitz allowed himself to drift to sleep.

"Hey Loona, did you, em…"

The owlet was fidgeting with her fingers, looking shy. The hellhound was about to leave to go to her own room for the night, but the tone Via used made her sit back immediately.

"What? Go ahead, even if it's silly, I won't judge, I promise."

"Thanks. It's just… I know you don't really know my dad, but I was hoping, maybe you smelled something that could explain why he's acting weird? It's been going on for weeks now, but tonight… I think tonight was the worst I saw him be."

"Because he was all distant?"

"Yes! You noticed too, right?"

"Hard not to! I mean, I don't know him, you're right, but even I know he's not that calm. I remember last week when we watched a movie together, he was really into it."
"Exactly! But today, he just looked… Completely out of it. Like if he wasn't even seeing the screen."

"Same. Honestly, I'm sure if you ask him tomorrow morning what the name of the show we watched is, he wouldn't know."

"No, he can't have been that distracted…"

"Wanna bet?" Loona smiled.

She probably shouldn't emphasize on it. She was there to enjoy her friend's presence, sure, but also to help distract her from her father's strange behavior, and she was doing the opposite. But honestly, at this point, she felt like if, maybe, hinting some things to Via may help Stolas consider their help. If not, well, it's not like if she could deny the obvious, that would only make Via more suspicious if she started to realize she was the only one off the loop.

"I'm worried", the princess confessed. "I don't know what's going on, but I feel like it's only getting worse. I tried to talk to him about it, but the more I try, the more he brushes it off and overdo it to appear like if everything is fine. But I know it's not, I'm not stupid. Can't your dad find out what's going on, or, I don't know, talk to him? I'm sure he noticed too, maybe dad will feel more free to talk to him?"

Loona hesitated for a moment before shrugging.

"Maybe, but even if he did, he wouldn't tell us. Adult people thing or something. Dads don't like to show weakness to their kids, they want to appear tough so we can rely on them or some bullshit like that. Better let them sort their shit out."

"Do you think it's because of their relationship? I know dad loves your dad…"

"Adoptive dad!"

"But I don't know if it's mutual. Dad can be really dramatic, maybe that's what's been bothering him?"

It was only then that what Octavia suggested caught up in Loona's mind, and she couldn't help but bark with laughter at how far from the truth it was.

"Come on, they are both emotionally constipated, but even they aren't that bad!" She added, still smiling with all her teeth.

Via smiled back.

"You're right, and they're getting closer. It's still weird to see, but he really looks happy with him. Tonight though… Even if Blitz was there, he was distracted. You're right, there's something else. Like…"

She stayed silent for a moment, and Loona patiently waited for her to continue. The owlet cast her a glance and added:

"Several times, I felt like he moved like when he was injured, you know, after the attack. But it can't be, right? You'd smell it if he was hurt?"

The hellhound froze, taken aback.

Oh fuck.

She didn't know how to answer to that.

"You know, it's true we have a good sense of smell, but I usually don't pay too much attention. There's just too many information. Sure, if someone just got hurt, it catches my attention easily, but other than that, it's not that simple."

"So… He's not hurt?"

Loona pondered for a moment, before she sighed.

"I wouldn't say that. I can smell people's state of health, and he's… Not well. Is he eating normally when you're around?"

Via blinked.

"Not really, no, that's part of what got me worried."

The hellhound nodded.

"Thought so."

19/06/2024

It's chapter 19 and I'm posting it on the 19th, isn't it beautiful? =D

I'm still slowed down in my writing, but I guess I needed to calm down to find motivation again. Don't worry, there's still a few chapters ready in advance for Selfless, and I'm working on the last chapter for Lonely path too ;)

Take care and see you next week!