Chapter 53

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As Elliot sat in her room, keeping a watchful eye over little Serena as she lay sleeping peacefully in her bassinet, his mind was so filled that he didn't even know where to begin! He looked over at Olivia, and tears immediately rushed to his eyes that he quickly wiped away.

"It was Harlan in that house, El. We found him in the basement where Liv was kept, Bronwyn did the kidnapping and brought Olivia right to him!"

"How could I let this happen again?" He thought just as the baby began to stir, her tiny cries coming from the bassinet. Elliot immediately got up and walked over to her, leaning over the bassinet. "Hey there little one." He said, lifting her in his arms. "What's the fuss, huh princess?" The baby whined for another few seconds before she began to quiet down and settled into his arms as he walked the room with her against his chest. He kissed the top of her head, inhaling her brand new scent while Olivia was dreaming.

"This..." He laughed. "Oh man, oh man! ...tell me you are as surprised to see me as I am to see you…"

"Don't do this!" she begged as he punched her in the face, then squeezed her neck before he ripped off her bra through her shirt.

"I'm gonna do you so good, baby!"

"No, nooo!" She cried panicking while she tried to ignore the pain ripping through her from the labor...

"It's happenin bitch, might as well enjoy it!" He said, causing pain as he squeezed then turned and ripped her pants from her body and tore her panties off, discarding them. He placed himself between her legs and she could feel him hard against her and it made her sick; she could not let this happen again. Could not allow herself to be further violated by this man and so with everything in her, she fought him…

Just that fast she startled awake, nearly jumping out of her skin, a cry emitting her lips as she struggled, breathing in deep, panicked gasps and pulling at the oxygen tube that was attached.

Elliot quickly nestled the baby into her bassinet and rushed over to Olivia.

"Liv, Liv it's okay, calm down!" He said, speaking soft yet firm, holding her down as much as he could without traumatizing her further but he needed to calm her. She was in tears, "Olivia, honey stop! Look at me; it's just me...it's just me baby!" When she stopped struggling and looked at him, realizing she was safe...

"Where's my baby? Elliot, give me my baby!" She cried through her tears. Elliot hadn't seen her so on edge in a long time and it alarmed him! He quickly went and lifted Serena from her bassinet and put her in the crook of his arm to hand her off to her mother.

"Liv it's alright, she's right here." He said as he settled the baby in her arms. She took hold of her and unleashed more tears, Elliot standing by her bed and watching her, his heart breaking in a million pieces as all of what he'd been told was suddenly confirmed right before his eyes, Harlan had raped her again and it took everything in him to keep calm for Olivia.

"Please...I just want to be alone!"

"L-"

"Elliot please!" She whispered as she held Serena close. Elliot wanted to stay, he wanted to tell her that he was here for her, that they all were but he knew that this wasn't the time. She needed to gather her thoughts, so much had happened in just the last 24 hours and she'd given birth to a baby that she still didn't know if Harlan was her father on top of almost dying. As much as he just wanted to take her in his arms and hold her, to love the pain away; she needed some time and it was with this that he kissed her head as she cried silently and he walked out.

"You're okay!"" She cried as she cradled Serena close to her. "Oh god, you're okay!"

In the hall, Elliot sat down in one of the chairs and dropped his head into his hands as tears started to flow and again, he wiped them away. There was no time for this, not when Olivia was so fragile; he had to be there for her, he'd deal with his own stuff later.

For now, he took out his phone and called Olivia's lawyer. They would be starting soon on the paternity case and he had to let her know that Olivia wouldn't be there and why.

In Manhattan at the hospital, Brian's mom was busy fawning over him. He'd had a rough night last night, the doctors having trouble stabilizing him as his blood pressure dipped dangerously low throughout the night and now, it was barely borderline but it was improved and his mom sent a prayer of thanks.

As she prepared for court, she dreaded leaving him, her baby. But she figured that if all went well, she'd be bringing him good news, news that could possibly help him to wake up and she knew that if he turned out to be the father of Olivia's baby, it would be just what he needed to get on the road to recovery.

"Today's the day!" She said to him, trying to sound optimistic as she adjusted his pillow to make it nice and comfortable. "Momma's gonna go to that courtroom and get your little girl!" But he couldn't hear her. The seizures he'd suffered lately had all but killed his brain and every day since they'd started he took in less and less and now, it was like talking to a log. The doctors warned her that he was headed in this direction but she wanted to believe that her son would pull through. That with time he'd be fine, regardless of what the doctors said and she would keep believing that.

"She'll be just what you need to come back to me!" And she kissed his lips before she went on her way.

"What do you want me to do? I am her attorney, so I can get the results if she wants." Carolyn told him.

"That's just it, I don't know what to do but I do know that if we wait…"

"That's not an answer but, I get it. Look, Elliot, as long as you understand that Olivia is my client and that I can't discuss the results with you-"

"No, no, I get it...just please, get the results and I'll have her call you when she wants them... thanks Carolyn." and he hung up the phone, praying that he'd done the right thing before he stood up, starting to go into Olivia's room but decided against it.

"She just needs a minute to let it all settle in man, she'll be okay!" Fin said.

"I know. Would you keep an eye on her? I gotta take a walk, get some air!"He said.

"Don't worry about it!"

"Thanks…" deciding instead to go pay Bronwyn a visit.

When he reached the 5th floor, he stopped at the nurses station to flash his badge and get Bronwyn's room number. Told that it was 529, he walked along the corridor until he came to it, a guard posted outside her door and Nick standing by the window to her room.

"So this is where you disappeared to, huh?" He said to Nick.

"I had to see to it that this bitch was down!" He said as he stared into her room and without turning around "I thought you were with Liv?"

"I was...but with everything sinking in-"

"Will this ever just end?"

Downstairs, Fin sat outside Liv's door for as long as he could before deciding that he couldn't wait anymore and went to her. He knocked twice before he heard her tell him to come in, she thinking it was a nurse and surprised to see that it was Fin.

"Hey" He greeted simply as she sat there in bed, holding her sleeping daughter. He looked over her, the stitches below her eye and her cut, swollen lip standing out along with the bruises to her face and neck and for just a moment he got angry but it was quickly replaced by joy at seeing her holding that beautiful baby.

"Fin...I can't right now, I just…" She said, trying to keep her tears in as she looked down at her daughter who was thankfully sleeping.

"It's okay, you don't have to be strong with me baby girl." He said as he approached the bed. She's gorgeous!"

"Thanks...I take it you know about him?"

"Saw the eleven holes you put in him!"

"He…" She swallowed the sob in her throat but her tears… "can I borrow your shoulder one last time?" the tears were about to burst again and she needed comfort.

"Do you even have to ask? Come here!" He said as he sat beside her and took her in his arms, her cries filling the room as her tears soaked his jacket. "It's alright Liv, just let it out; let it all out!"

"I hate him!" She cried "...and I wish to god that I could kill him again!"

Over at Darrell's apartment, Amanda had finally decided to get up and out of bed, taking a shower and now sat in the living room, curled up on the sofa in her pajamas.

Darrell's mom had arrived yesterday morning and after seeing her, Amanda just wanted to be left alone. Darrell looked so much like his mother; his smile, his eyes, the slope of his nose; she couldn't handle it and thankfully his mother understood and gave her some time.

For the first time since Friday night, she gathered the bag they had given her at the morgue and dumped its contents on the coffee table in front of her.

She began looking through the various things; his wallet where he kept a receipt from their first date. They'd gone to play paintball; she remembered that she'd never had so much fun in her life she thought as she wiped a tear that made it's way down her face.

She spent the next few minutes going through the bag, among the things inside included his cell phone with a screensaver of them engaged in a kiss on their wedding day and she fell apart. But what made her lose it above all else was the chain she later pulled out of the bag. He'd wore it around his neck and it had his wedding ring on it, just like hers had. Lying down on the couch with the ring and holding it close while she sobbed, she just wished that she had told him not to go. She wished that he'd just stayed, made love to her until they were both too tired to do anything except lie there and think about their future children and talk about how cute they'd be and then drift off to sleep with it in their minds.

As she lay there on the sofa thinking of Darrell, she didn't know that she was missing the burner phone that had been in the bag. Fin had taken it when he and Amaro had brought Olivia by and he was now waiting for it to be unlocked although he didn't need it at this point, he'd found all he needed when they'd searched the mansion!

Later Olivia came out of the bathroom walking slowly with a limp. She nearly passed out from the pain of urinating! Between the birth ripping her open and the doctors trying to control the bleeding afterwards she'd gotten a ton of stitches down below and right now, she was feeling every single one.

"You alright?"

"It's a good thing I'm old because I am…"

"Lemme guess, never doing this again?" Fin laughed. "The way I see it, unless you got that taken care of, Mr. Supersperm'll fix that in no time, better watch it!" She smiled briefly and gave a curt laugh.

"Thanks for watching her." She said as she slowly sat in the chair opposite him

"No problem. I think this is the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. You did good, Liv!" He said as he put Serena in her arms and she grew quiet.

"Fin what if I can't protect her?" She said as she looked down at her with tears in her eyes. He took a spare blanket from the closet and draped it over her legs. "What if one day…"

"What if one day she's happy and content? She's got a mother that loves her and a guy that although he has the propensity to be a huge asshole, he's a great father and he's gonna love and protect her like his own. Don't waste you time on 'what ifs' baby girl, just concentrate on what's in front of you, you'll be alright!" Olivia hugged him just as the baby started to whine. "I'm gonna go and let you tend to her. You remember what I said, and if you need me, you just call!"

"I will, and Fin?"

"Yeah?"

"If you see El, would you send him in?"

"Will do." By the time Fin left, the Serena's whines were escalating to cries. Olivia quickly unhooked her gown on one side and let it fall, putting Serena to her breast and though it was painful, she watched as she latched on and began to feed, and she sat back in the chair to get comfortable as she held her.

"You know, throughout my pregnancy I wondered if I was doing the right thing with having you, then I wondered if I was doing the right thing with keeping you; then giving you up and now… I'm so sorry I ever thought of letting you go!" She said as tears fell and she held the baby's tiny hand and kissed it. "I love you so much, even more than I thought was possible; you're only a few hours old and I already can't imagine my world without you in it...my Serena. One day, when you're old enough I'll tell you about your grandmother. You're named after her and she would have loved you almost as much as I do! ...I don't know if you're Brian's or his, you honestly dont look like either of them, but I do know that it doesn't matter who's you are. You're mine and that's all that counts, I love you baby!"

After he went to see Bronwyn, Elliot talked with Nick before he went to call his kids. He couldn't reach the twins so he talked to Maureen and Kathleen for what seemed like forever. He'd decided not to tell them about the kidnapping and instead just focused on Liv and the baby, both of them being so happy that Serena was finally here and telling him that they'd both come by to see Olivia when she felt up to it before they said goodbye and told their father they loved him. Afterwards, he decided to take a walk around the hospital before making his way back to Liv's room where he saw Fin on the way.

"Headin out?" Elliot asked.

"Yeah, I gotta check in on Amanda then get to the precinct."

"Thanks for everything, Fin, I mean it!"

"You just keep Liv and that little girl happy! By the way I think she's okay now, she asked me to send you in if I saw you."

"You talked to her?"

"Somethin like that. I'll see you later." He said and left. Elliot hurried down the hall and went straight for Liv's room. He knocked as he entered and was surprised to see her in the chair and nursing.

"You're breastfeeding!?" He said, both a surprised statement and a question.

"I thought I'd try it; it's better for her than formula and she seems to be taking to it pretty good." She said and stroked the baby's hair. " but gosh, it hurts like hell!" Elliot came and kneeled in front of her, taking Olivia's hand and kissing it before he took Serena's hand, letting her wrap it around his finger and he sat there for a minute.

"She's got a grip!"

"Not just with her hands! I never thanked you for what you did."

"No need, it's what anybody would do."

"You're not just anybody." She said and took his hand, pausing before she spoke again. "I wanna move on. I wanna put all of this behind me, I can't make a good life for her, or for us if I don't… I should have told you what he did to me; months ago I should have told you but I didn't- I didn't know how." She was in tears which made Elliot get teary. "I'm so sorry!"

"Hey, I love you, you understand? More than anything else in this world, I love you! You have nothing to be sorry for; whatever he did to you, I still love you and I will always love you. I will always want you and I'll always need you. You are my life and I don't know how to be clearer about that!" She kissed his lips, sweetly and lovingly, telling him without words and when she was done, their lips parted and their foreheads touched as they held each others faces close and tears ran down hers.

"What about Serena? If she's Brian's, his mother-"

"Will have a hell of a fight!" He said and they let a brief silence settle between them.

"Tell me again"

"That I love you more than life? Because I do; and that includes the little goober now, too!"

At the courthouse…

"...the honorable Robert J. Young deciding. You may be seated." The bailiff said. As the judge got comfortable and the courtroom got settled, Mrs. Cassidy looking over at Olivia's lawyer's table and then around the courtroom, she failed to see Olivia.

"...or that damn boyfriend of hers...what are they trying to pull here?" She thought and began whispering to her lawyer.

"Is there a problem?" Judge Young asked Joanie's lawyer.

"Actually sir, there is. It seems that Ms. Benson has chosen to skip out on the hearing and we fear she may have left town." Max Pooley, Joanie's attorney told the judge.

"Ms. Jeris? Care to address this?" Judge Young asked Olivia's attorney.

"Gladly your honor. Sergeant Benson is in the hospital. She went into labor last night and gave birth just after seven this morning with complications. I assure you she has not "skipped out" on this hearing and in fact, I've been instructed to collect the results in her absence." Joanie's eyes went large.

"Are she and the baby alright?" Judge Young asked, concerned.

"Yes sir. Everything turned out well, I'll tell her you asked." She smiled and sat.

"Very well, if everyone is satisfied, we can begin."

"So, the slut tried to hide the fact that she'd given birth to my grandchild? No worries, Olivia. You'll pay for that too!" Joanie smiled smugly.

More to come, kids.