Chapter 74.

"They didn't give their names on the news, but they're Emiko and Plumm… Emiko being the older girl?

"How did you…?" Olivia wondered out loud.

"Because I think I may be their mother…"

"Before this goes any further. I'm gonna go." Olivia said, though she wanted more than anything to stay. If this young lady was telling the truth, hell, even if she wasn't... "I'm not a police officer; not anymore."

"But you were. You're the sergeant who was kidnapped a couple of years ago, right? Olivia Benson… you had a great reputation before you left the force. I just wish you could've helped me back then; it's why I chose to come here, instead of the FBI," Haru told them. "You people care and I need people who'll care…"

"Miss Abara-"

"Haru, please."

"Haru," Fin corrected. "If you are their mom…what are you hoping to accomplish?"

"This has kept me up at night, wondering, going back to such a disturbing past and having to relive it. Some days I thought about them and I wondered; maybe life was doing me and them favors by keeping us apart, wherever they were. When I saw them on TV, it was brief, but the FBI was coming out of that hotel with these two little girls in their arms wrapped in blankets. It just happened to catch my attention and I wasn't sure, but I couldn't get over how much they looked like me a long time ago."

She went on to tell Fin and Olivia that the story drove her crazy, especially when she went looking for it online and printed out that brief shot of the girls. It had been promised that they had gone to good homes after they'd been born, but to see them together and knowing that they'd been sold to a pedophlie crushed Haru's whole world.

When she was just eleven years old, tired of the physical, mental and horrible sexual abuse she suffered at the hands of her mom and father for years, Haru who was three months pregnant by her father father, ran away from home. On the streets, she hitched rides from questionable guys and did some questionable things that she as a woman should not have been made to do, much less being a minor child. She traveled all the way from Florida up to Maryland this way, trading sex in exchange for rides, the occasional meal or a few dollars here and there. In Maryland, she was sleeping in a bus station and that was where she met a thirty-two year old man who was so sick and evil, he made her father seem like a boy scout. His name was Jack Donaldson.

Immediately, he began a sexual relationship with Haru and eventually would ask her to sleep with people he said he owed money to, and Haru did it. She didn't want Jack to be hurt by these supposed men, but in a short time, he outright prostitute her. At eleven and a half, she had been with so many men she couldn't count them. Jack made sure that she'd do anything he wanted just to feel wanted and loved and he took full advantage of her in the worst ways. Then, at just seven months pregnant, after being beaten by a john that Jack had stolen from, she went into premature labor and gave birth to a son in a motel. The baby didn't survive, born blue. Jack took him and the placenta out to the woods and buried him. Over the next two years, Jack continued to pimp her out, and she got pregnant twice more- the father was anybody's guess.

After Emiko was born to her at twelve (turns out, their names were spelled wrong by ACS), Haru wanted to keep her, but Jack convinced her to give the baby up, telling her that he knew a couple who was desperate for a baby. Besides, she was nothing but a junkie whore and a kid. How could she take care of a baby? He convinced her that she couldn't give Emiko any kind of life and at first she refused, but after reminding her that she had customers and several beatings later, she relented and Jack took Emiko away, she was a week old. Less than a year later, he did the same thing with Plumm. Haru held on to her for almost two weeks, but Jack had taken her when Haru was entertaining customers, and soon after Jack took Plumm away, he got arrested for speeding, which led to discovering his many warrants, including one for a murder that happened seven years ago. and Haru was lost. When he got arrested, the other girls Jack had, they walked away and got with other pimps, the younger ones ended up with men like Abernathy but almost all of them continued that life until it took them.

"I was thirteen years old and I had started using after Plumm got taken away. I was a junkie that had given birth three times already. Jack was gone; for life I would later discover, and I didn't have a clue of what to do. I tried hooking on my own to keep Jack supplied with money for commissary, but got beaten more times than I got paid, but at this point, I was desperate. I got pregnant again from a rape; but I was so heavy into drugs at that point that I miscarried."

She got her life together when just a year later, she a hotshot of heroin from a john and ended up in a coma. She met an angel in a social worker named Sandra. She took Haru in and helped her to get her life on track for the first time ever. She helped get her into rehab and therapy. And it was because of Sandra that Haru got her GED. It was also never known because she'd spent her life being abused, but Haru was smart; very smart. Sandra had her enroll at community college where she got a full scholarship to attend University in New York City when she graduated. With her high scores on the LSAT, she got into Columbia law school, and was now completing her J.D. in May of next year.

"I wanted to become a lawyer to help young women like I used to be, and it turns out that my children…if they are my children, are like I used to be, only worse. Jack promised me each time that they were going to have good lives; a home with mothers and fathers who loved them. If I had known that he was going to sell them to this person, this… Abernathy who would abuse them before they could even walk…" her tears came down, and she wept with an overwhelmingly palpable sense of shame. "I should have protected them; I should have…"

"You were just a child yourself," Olivia comforted as she handed Haru tissues. "You did what you thought was the right thing for them at the time."

"I have to know," Haru cried. "For weeks I've been trying to convince myself that it's a mistake, that my children are somewhere safe with a family that loves and cares for them. I finally went to Sandra with and she agreed that I can't just ignore this. Maybe it's the universe giving me a second chance; giving my children a second chance. If they are mine, I want to be their mom. I know I'm young, but I'm ready, and Sandra has already told me that she's here for me wherever I decide to go with this. I want my little girls, they've suffered long enough without me!

...

"Hey," Elliot whispered as he touched Olivia's shoulder. "You okay?" He asked, seeing her in a state of what looked like total consumption by whatever was on her mind. But Olivia was so lost in thought, she didn't hear him the first time and it wasn't until he called her again…

"...what?" Embarrassed that she had apparently completely zoned out, she looked down at Fin who was now sleeping in her arms. "I must have…" she began, but lost her train of thought. "Is Serena asleep?" She asked anew as she put the baby down in his co-sleeper.

Elliot was alarmed, "Liv, baby she's right beside you in our bed." Olivia turned, looking over her left shoulder and feeling foolish when she saw Serena there, sleeping soundly and she shook her head, blaming exhaustion on her momentary memory lapse.

"What's going on with you? You've been distracted ever since you came home. Did something happen with those girls?"

Olivia looked at her children again, before she walked out of the room signaling for El to follow her. They ended up walking down the stairs to the living room.

"I stopped to see Fin on my way home and a young woman…she just walked in. She saw the story on TV and thought that they might be her daughters."

"Where's she been all this time?"

"It's a long story, but she's only twenty-three, and she had it rough. She had a stillborn at age twelve and when the girls were taken away by her pimp shortly after birth, she was told that they were bought by loving parents who were desperate for a baby…"

"...not knowing he sold them to Abernathy," Elliot said to no one in particular. Dammit, shit like this, he'd never get used to hearing.

"Being young and stupid, she took his word and thought all this time that at least her girls were in good homes, and then she saw the story about Abernathy on television and it crushed her. She's been wondering since they made the arrest if the girls are in fact her daughters…"

"And she's credible?"

"She has information that wasn't made public; the girls names are spelled wrong and according to her, Plumm is eight, not seven. She has birth certificates for both of them and they looks ridiculously like her; so much it's creepy,"

"...and you're upset?"

"I'm not upset… at least I'm trying not to be. El, she doesn't know how affected those girls are by what happened to them, and if she turns out to be their mother, I'm afraid for them that she's not prepared for it. What if she doesn't want the responsibility of two deeply damaged children?"

"...like you do?"

"I didn't say that-"

"But you're thinking it. You've made it clear from the minute you found out about those girls that you want to mother them,"

"And is that so bad?"

"No…no, it's not. I love that you're so passionate, it's one of the reasons I fell in love with you and one of the things that keeps me loving you. Those girls can't have anyone better on their side, but Liv, they do have someone. They have a mother who came forward because she wants to save her children…"

…

The next morning at the precinct…

"So what do we know?" Torres said as he stood at the white board.

"...besides that woman not being Carolyn, you mean?" Nick retorted, never turning to Torres. Fin, who was sitting on the table, had to interject.

"Amaro…"

"No, Fin, it's okay," Torres replied while trying to keep his cool. "It was an honest mistake,"

"One that could've been avoided if you'd just let the ME's office do their job before you scared the fuckin life out of me!"

"¿Cuántas veces tengo que decir que lo siento, hombre?" Torres said, raising his voice as he and Nick got in each other's faces. They were about to come to blows.

"Hey!" Fin yelled, putting himself between the two. "Take a breather!"

"Or better, why don't you go back across the bridge" Nick said, staring Torres down. The man didn't even blink at Nick's show of machismo. "...we have a young woman to get justice for,"

"Actually, we, across-the-bridge, have a young woman to get justice for. And I think I will go back to Brooklyn… Fin, I'll keep you updated with any leads." He said, glaring at Amaro, then grabbed his coat and left. Fin just stood there for a moment.

"What the hell was that?"

"We don't need him,"

"Actually, we did. This is Brooklyn's case, not ours. And the fact that he let us in, even after the mix up…"

"He had me thinking that she was dead!"

"And he's sorry about that, hell, I'm sorry about it. Nobody knows more than me how this has affected you, but Nick, give him a break. Carolyn will come home,"

"And what if she can't, Fin? What if she can't? I tried calling her again after seeing that Torres was wrong, and nothing. No callback, no text to let me know she's alright,"

"Nick,"

"I think I will take that break;" He said as he felt tears stinging his eyes. "I need some air!" He said and walked off towards the staircase before Fin could say anything.

…

Lying on the ground nearby, Carolyn thought about her life as she cried. She thought about her family; about Nick. He probably didn't even know she was missing yet. What he must be thinking. They'd just lost their baby and when she thinks of how she didn't give him the chance to grieve such a substantial loss with her... She'd completely shut him out and now… She screamed in frustration, in sorrow, in sheer terror at the final act that this monster was about to commit against her.

He cursed in his head as he was at his final foot of dirt. Why can't this be easier?

"Because easy makes it boring, Stanley. You know that." He laughed as he kept digging. Muffled screams and cries could be heard in the background and honestly, they made him feel powerful. Carolyn was horrified when she saw that he was digging a grave, and now she fought to no avail against her restraints. Finally, dirty and sweaty despite the relative cool fifty-five degrees of the greenhouse, Stanley stopped, holding the shovel at his side.

"Looks good if I say so myself!" He admired the dig, the hole seven feet deep but barely three feet by two feet wide. "Tight fit, but I think you'll be comfortable." He laughed before he tossed his shovel overhead out of the grave. Giving the hole one last look, he turned and climbed up the ladder to get out before pulling that up as well and dropping it on the floor of the greenhouse. Taking a moment, he looked around the large space, resting a bit with his hands on his hips, when he decided that the hole was just what he wanted. Satisfied, he reached down to the ground and dragged the hysterically crying woman to the freshly dug hole. It was Carolyn, naked and badly beaten with her hands and feet tied.

"Any last words?" He asked as he caressed her face. But of course he couldn't hear her with the gag in her mouth. He decided to remove it, just to hear her cries for his own shits and giggles. The second he removed it, he was met with more screams. They were hoarse screams by now, but still, she was every bit as terrified as her eyes met his.

She begged him not to do what he was about to do. She pleaded with him on behalf of her family, her fiance. She begged him for her life. She looked to Stanley with pleading eyes as she begged him to have mercy, to not put her in that grave but he was unmoved as he smiled, fawning over her left hand.

"I bet your fiance saved a lot of pennies to buy you this ring," he said as he turned it this way and that. Carolyn just lay there on the ground, her hands tied behind her and she cried silent tears as she thought of the day Nick had proposed.

"Shhhhh!" He fished the ring box from his inner pocket but obscured it with his hand. "This isn't the way I wanted to do this," he kissed her hand then got down on his knee."

"What are you-?"

"Do you know how much begging I had to do for your father to say yes?"

"My father? ...what?"

"I called him a week ago. Carolyn, if you'd given me the chance, I wanted to do this romantically, something you could remember and brag about. I love you Carolyn. You are the one for me and I wouldn't ever, ever risk losing you." He revealed the ring box and she cried even harder as she stood there, her hand in his as she realized.

"What are you doing?!" She asked stupidly, in tears. "You were planning to do this all along and I ruined it... Mi amor, lo siente!" She cried and he immediately got up and held her.

"No querida. No lo arruinaste. It doesn't matter how I got here, all that matters is I am. And I want you to be my wife more than anything. I knew that from the second I met you, when I stole a look at you on that elevator," she laughed through her tears, remembering that day. "You're everything to me Caro, and I want you to marry-"

"Yes!" She said in tears. "Yes, I'll marry you!" She threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tight and kissing his face. "Put it on me?"

"I thought you'd never ask!" He opened the ring box to reveal a two carat, cushion-cut diamond set in a diamond encrusted platinum band. She gasped at the ring as he put it on her hand, being absolutely in love with it.

"No getting rid of us Amaro!"

"Wait..."us"?" His heart was beating fast and he was at a loss for words. "Are you..."

Teary eyed, she nodded. "I just found out this morning. Are you happy?"

She felt so completely loved that day, and she decided that she'd focus on that love as she went to her terrible fate.

"...I think I'll keep it …a little souvenir." She heard Stanley say, bringing her out of her beautiful reverie and back to her harsh reality.

That ring was all she had to remember him; the only bit of comfort she had to take with her, and he'd decided that it would be best with him. She began sobbing as he forcefully tried to remove the ring from her finger, but she wouldn't let it go that easily and bawled her fist and twisting and turning, trying to fight as she screamed her protest.

"Please don't take it. Please, don't…"

"Give me the fucking ring!" He spat while struggling to get it from her hand. Eventially, he grew tired of fighting her and broke the finger that held the ring, quickly bending it backwards and snapping it. She screamed internally, taking heavy breaths through her nose as he took the jewelry from her now-broken finger and smiled as he leaned forward, delivering a lingering kiss to her ear and neck.

"Corpses don't need nice things." He said and stood up, pocketing the ring.

"I think I'll leave the gag off." He said and used his foot to shove her naked body into the freshly dug hole. She landed hard, breaking her right shoulder and left wrist as she hit the hard dirt below and cried out. She whimpered painfully there in the tiny hole, unable to move from her cramped and folded position.

Stanley was amused by all of this and he laughed, then took up a shovel full of dirt. At that moment, she saw a millipede crawling and she began to scream and cry even louder, but Stanley was unmoved and threw the dirt in the hole, hitting her in the face as the spray of dirt came down on her. He began to swiftly fill the hole, throwing one shovel full after another as she screamed, eventually gagging and coughing as the dirt came down until she started to hyperventilate.

Some time later, he had finished. The grave being completely filled and he was now planting the last of a bunch of tomato vines over the area. Patting the soil of the last plant, he stood up to admire his work. You couldn't even tell that underneath there was a grave that a live woman had died in and now it was morning. Stanley was feeling like a million dollars, and why shouldn't he? He had proven that his lair was a success and in the process, killed the test whore. Harlan would be proud! This killing made him feel something more than the previous ones. Yes, this killing made him feel a sense of power, even moreso than he'd already felt.

Looking at his watch, he made note of the time and knew he couldn't be late. Carefully, he put away his tools before he left the greenhouse and went for a shower.

Later, he cracked a sly, slight grin as he continued scribbling on the pad in front of him and cleared his throat.

"No sir, Chief Wilson. Not a problem." He said out loud to an empty room. He sat there, fully dressed as though for a work day, when in reality, he hadn't worked for the bureau in just about two years. He'd snapped when Elliot had him reprimanded and he was demoted just after Serena's birth. Unable to deal with all of the embarrassment, one day he walked out after giving his superior some choice words, and he never came back. Neither did his already fragile mind.

God, he couldn't wait until he got hold of his real marks.

…

Wide awake, Joe, bored as damn, decided to use his phone to do some research before he had to be at Joanie's house later this morning. He wanted to gather his own information about Olivia Benson, sort of scope her out before he made his next move against her. Joanie didn't tell him much, aside from Olivia being Serena's mother and that she was responsible for the death of Joanie's only son. Apparently she convinced her then-lover, Harlan Lewis to kill her son so they could have Serena, but then Olivia turned and killed Harlan after the job was done?

These people were beyond strange. But hey, fifteen thousand is fifteen thousand, right? Joe figured that once he'd earned his money, he'd definitely be going back to Oregon, hell, maybe Alaska. His buddy told him that they're looking for loggers up there. Who knows, some time in the forest might do him good!

"Let's see what the internet says about you, Olivia Benson!"

He'd be so sorry that he went looking.

…

"...surgical." Kathleen said into her phone as someone knocked at her door. "Yes…" she looked through the peephole and saw that it was Elizabeth. She unlocked the door and walked away as Lizzie came in. Yes…yes I can be there tomorrow morning…uh huh, I have the address. Okay, I'll see you in the morning." And she hung up.

"See who in the morning?" Lizzie asked as she took the half bagel from Kathleen's plate and was about to tear into it when Kathleen snatched it back and took a big bite.

"Still nosey, I see,"

"I was gonna eat that,"

"So was I," Kathleen chewed, laughing. "What are you doing here?"

"It's so good to see you, dear sister…"

Kathleen hugged her little sister. "Aww, you know it's always good to see you!" She said.

"I know!" Lizzie said as she again stole the bagel from Kathleen's hand. "I don't have class until 11, so I thought I'd come and bring you shoes back and give you the ticket for your dress at the dry cleaners…" she said as she was putting jelly on the bagel. "It'll be ready tomorrow."

Kathleen pushed the ticket back to Lizzie. "You can hold onto this…"

"Come on, I'm a broke med student. Don't be like that," Lizzie smiled slyly as she slid it back.

"At least I got my shoes back for free…"

"Oh my god. So, the guy I went out with last night, he LOVED me in those shoes! I dont know if he has a fetish, but he took me home and fucked me all nigh! I am so sore, but I feel so good!"

"And to think, you were so quiet growing up…" Kathleen said, getting a ha-ha from Elizabeth. "did Mo tell you about the creep I ran into at whole foods last night?"

"She said it sounded like you weren't taking your meds,"

"God, she marries a doctor and thinks she is one! For the record, I am taking my meds and there was legit a bona-fide, Nordic looking creep in Whole Foods. You should've seen this fucker…"

"Just be careful. You know there's always some weirdo running around the city. "

…

"So what do you say, Princess," Elliot asked Serena as he was filling her cup with orange juice. "would you like to go to school with the four-year-olds?"

"Ummmmm…" Serena put a spoonful of oatmeal in her mouth and chewed, thinking about it while Elliot put the orange juice container down on the table. "Daddy?"

"What's up?" He asked with an elbow on her high chair.

"If I am with the four-year-olds, will you or mommy still take me to school?"

"Of course we will; every day."

"...and come get me?" She said, putting a bite of banana in her mouth.

"Just like always…" he was saying to her as his phone rang. "One second, sweetheart," he said as he went to the island counter to retrieve his phone. "Jack, hey. What's going on?"

"Nothing good,"

"Care to explain?" He said as he sat and picked up Serena's spoon to feed her.

"You know that situation we've been watching for two years? Well it's no longer dormant."

Elliot dropped the spoon he was holding, just as it was headed to Serena's mouth,

"Daddy is clumsy!" Serena laughed as Elliot was lulled into a stunned silence while his mind went to a million different places at once. "Don't worry daddy, I can feed myself. I a big girl!" Elliot heard her say, but it was like she was a world away.

How can this be?

"Stabler, did you hear me?"

Elliot had to bring himself back to reality where he looked at Serena. "...you're sure?"

…

Poor Joe. He sat in the dining chair of his studio apartment, literally in shock.

Is this real? He thought, after seeing everything he saw online. All of this apparently started with a man named William Lewis and it spiraled; that's the only word Joe could think of to describe what it must have been like for that woman- a complete spiral! How was she even holding her life together at this point? He wondered.

"No, no…" he said to himself as he got up from the small table and ran his fingers through his hair then down his face. "It could still be like Joanie said… couldn't it?" He had to know for sure. What she was willing to pay him was good money. Was it sketchy money? Yes, but he damn sure didn't want to be mixed up in anything that would drive an innocent woman crazy.

"This is stupid! There's no way that this could be misrepresented, Joe, you've seen it with your own eyes. Face it man, that old lady lied to you and you fell for it! …but what exactly happened to her son? …don't do that, Joey! You ain't a dummy and this woman, this Joanie, she's bad news."

He thought this as he paced back and forth across the small apartment. Dammit, having a conscience may end up costing him fifteen thousand… "Fuck it, I have to know!" He grabbed his coat, cap and his keys from the bowl on the dresser and headed out the door.

tbc…