On the day of your birth, you receive new clothes, several toys, cake and ice cream, and the experience of having not-quite but almost actual friends over. The true present, however, is a tiny dog. It is the ugliest canine you've ever laid eyes on in this life, it growls like a tiny chainsaw, and it appears to have a murderous grudge against socks, and an only slightly less intense dislike for shoes.

You name him "Moblin."