Chapter 2
General POV - Earth
More than half the Cullen family was assembled in the waiting room of the Forks General Hospital when Carlisle entered and motioned for Esme, Edward, Alice and Jasper to follow him into his office.
Alice was all but biting her nails nervously, her visions still clouded. Jasper was making plans to fake Bella's death to get her turned as quickly and as safely as possible. Carlisle was worrying about Bella's mental state. Esme burst out: "Well? How are they?" the moment they were alone, her worries equally on Bella and Edward.
But all of them kept thinking the same thing: What had Edward said to Bella to make her like that?
Everyone including Edward himself because he honestly had no idea.
"Charlie Swan has several fractures in both his legs where he was crushed underneath the debris", Carlisle stated somberly. "They will heal but it will take time, about three months at the very least I suspect. Bella only has a couple of scrapes and bruises but she's suffering from severe shock. She's largely unresponsive. When I mentioned her father's injuries though and asked if she wanted to see him, she started screaming and threw me against the wall with enough force to leave a crack in it."
"She threw you against a wall?" Jasper echoed incredulously.
"Without moving a muscle herself, yes", the doctor confirmed tired.
One week ago when Bella Swan stepped into their lives, everything had changed. Alice had seen her joining the family as Edward's mate immediately, before she even came to school. Edward's first reaction had been denial. He didn't want to curse any living human to a life like theirs. Then when her scent hit him he'd been convinced he'd never be able to spend any time around her at all to even get to know her. But aside from that first day where he'd almost ended her right then, Alice visions remained strong. So while Edward was gone the others got curious. Carlisle and Esme were so glad that there was one out there for their first son after all. Carlisle switched shifts with a colleague to be there when Bella came in for her checkup and Esme set up a cooking course when Alice predicted her looking for one. They only had brief chances to talk to her but knew her to be a headstrong, happy and kind person.
Alice was already living five years into the future, sure she would be best friends with Bella. When the girl had invited her to their first shopping trip, Alice was already busy planning the fifth one.
There was another thing she saw and that was that Bella, as a vampire, would be gifted. Extraordinarily so. So much in fact Jasper started pushing for turning her just for strategic reasons. She would give their coven a new offensive talent that could strengthen their position against the Volturi, who were already eyeing the three gifted Cullen siblings. Between Edward, Jasper and Alice they had a lot of supportive power but Jasper was the only one who could truly use his gift as a weapon. Bella's telekinesis, coupled with the support of her premonitions, would make her more effective than any of the Volturi's fighters. She had it all, range, speed and the ability to target several people at once. In Jasper's mind they needed to turn and secure her alliance while they still could. If her gift manifested this strongly already as a human, the danger grew that the Volturi or another powerful coven would learn about her and snatch her up first. If she was truly Edward's mate, that might mean loosing him too and if that happened, the Cullen clan might no longer be safe for Alice and Jasper to stay with.
Alice groaned. "Edward, what have you said to her? I see all kinds of bad things in her future now!"
Edward, who had a first row seat for the images of depression, destructive newborn rage and self-isolation winced.
"I said nothing to her that would justify that kind of reaction!", he defended himself.
"You're the last person who saw her before the... incident. It would help us if you recounted what happened", Carlisle asked calmly.
"I talked to her to confirm what she knew and that she would keep silent", Edward explained patiently. "Just as we discussed. Everything was fine there. She was... friendly. Bella asked about Alice' visions and I told her but she didn't seem very concerned. She seems to think there might be other reasons her future kept vanishing, like maybe the presence of the Quileute shifters were creating blind spots."
"There haven't been any shifters for many years", Carlisle said concerned.
"Alice, can you see the reservation?" Jasper asked alarmed.
Alice was silent for a moment but then to the surprise of everyone, she shook her head.
"I can see parts of it here and there but never the whole land at once." Now she sounded frustrated. "A walking blind spot. Great, just what we need now."
"What else did Bella say?" Carlisle wanted to know.
"That was it. But I had the impression that she was afraid of something or that someone was after her. In Forks she feels safe. Like that morning when she predicted her own death and came to us. She was counting on one of us saving her if necessary, if only because her getting so much as a scratch might end up... exposing us too." Edward looked down. "I told her that if anyone gave her trouble because of her gift, she could come to us for help. That's when she got upset."
"She got upset because you offered to help her?" Esme repeated confused.
"I don't think it was that. It's more like... She came to Forks to hide physically but hadn't realized that this meant she might not have to hide who she is anymore. Like nobody ever offered her that opportunity. She was overwhelmed. Bella fled and I wanted to leave too but changed my mind. She was crying and I wanted to make sure she got home alright. So I went to her house. She didn't see me. She'd calmed down and was watching a movie and everything was fine, I swear it. I came back here and than Alice had her vision."
Alice' vision had come too late to prevent what appeared to be a major mental breakdown of Bella, which triggered a small telekinetic storm that had collapsed half her house and buried her father under the debris. The vision gave them enough of a warning to make sure an ambulance arrived in a timely manner and to spread rumors and fake eyewitness accounts about a rare localized tornado. Jasper went to uproot a couple of trees to make the pattern more convincing. The last thing they needed was the inhabitants of Forks to start believing in the supernatural after all.
"Her father only seemed concerned about Bella. He kept asking to see her, to know if she was alright", Carlisle said. "Bella grew up here but moved away as she got older. Do we know if her father is aware of her gifts?"
"Chief Swan is really hard to read", Edward said. "If you haven't told him the tornado story yet I can listen in and see if he buys it."
Carlisle agreed, which caused Alice to perk up as her visions showed her the result of the coming conversation.
"He doesn't know. Edward will come back to report that Charlie was extremely confused but he had no other explanation. Don't let him see Bella yet though. She'll cry again if he does. I think she blames herself for accidentally hurting him."
"So it's not her father? The one she's afraid of?" Esme said relieved. Her reaction to Carlisle's words had worried her. She liked Chief Swan and didn't want to think badly of him.
"I don't think so", Alice said.
"Can't you read anything from her?" Jasper asked Edward. "Her room is within your range now, isn't it?"
Edward grimaced. "Her thoughts are terribly self-deprecating. She seems to think that there's something terribly wrong with her, that she'll hurt the people around her..." More quietly, more pained himself, he whispered: "She thinks she's been born a monster."
"Oh that poor girl", Esme made.
"But it doesn't make any sense!" Alice protested. "Bella is so good and kind and she doesn't blame any of us for anything we've done in the past. Why would she think of herself worse than of us?"
"I don't know", Edward made frustrated. "I... I caught a memory, once, of her curled up in some kind of white cell. Maybe..." He gazed at the others helplessly. He didn't want to finish that sentence but from the way Alice' face just sort of froze, he knew at least his sister understood his concerns.
Maybe she had been institutionalized before. Maybe that was because of her gifts, because she kept telling people how she would or would not die or catch them lying. But maybe, tragically, she really wasn't entirely sane.
"I will check her medical records", Carlisle said quietly.
"We have to turn her", Jasper said urgently. Edward made to protest but he kept talking: "No Edward, let me speak. Right now she's dangerous both to herself and to everyone around her. About the only thing that has a good chance of stabilizing her is you, if Alice' visions come true. But you can't be with her the way she needs you to as long as she's human. Chief Swan hasn't been informed yet about the full extent of her injuries or the lack thereof so we can say she actually had a dangerous head injury that was missed and killed her. We take her north, far away from any humans and-"
"No we won't!" Edward burst out. "Bella doesn't want to be turned!"
"She does, I saw her agreeing to it many times", Alice muttered stubbornly.
"M-Maybe sometime in the future but not now", Edward said. "She told me so herself just yesterday!"
"If she doesn't want it, we won't do it", Carlisle decided but Jasper didn't want to hear it.
"That was yesterday. Obviously something changed since then! And it's not just about her choice, this whole family could be in danger if-"
"Jasper", Carlisle said sternly. "If she doesn't want it, we won't do it. None of us will."
For all that they pretended to be a loving family, if it came down to it, Carlisle was still their coven leader and his word was law. This usually worked well only because Carlisle would never misuse his power. Today though, Jasper stared him down. He looked every bit the former Major he was and Edward was already shifting, instincts pushing him to adopt a fighting position.
"We can at least make the offer again", Jasper said quietly, coldly "If you won't do it, I will ask her." He turned towards Alice. "Well, what will she say?"
Alice managed to grow even paler and clutched at her mate's arm. "No...", she muttered, eyes wide. "No, you can't." She swallowed thickly, her visions too horrible to put into words. She just shook her head. "No, Jasper. Not now."
Edward's eyes widened as he saw what his sister saw: a vision of another telekinetic outburst, of Bella fleeing the hospital with bloody, bare feet, running, running until she eventually reached a cliff, the wind in her hair and then-
Edward gave a cry of rage and before anyone could react, he had Jasper by the throat, pressed against the next wall. The older vampire was surprised but decades of battle instincts let him react quickly. He had Edward on the ground a split second later, the ground cracking from the impact. A wave of calm washed over them so violent it had every human two rooms in all directions pause and stare into empty space in a trance-like state for a few moments.
"Eeeeedward... Jaaaasper... There's no need to aaaaargue", Carlisle slurred, himself wavering under the dampening effect of Jasper's gift.
"He's right", Jasper said overly friendly, releasing Edward. "It was just a test. If Alice says it won't work, then that's that. I just had to make sure. You understand, don't you?"
Edward stared up at his brother as the older vampire turned the chokehold into offering him a hand to stand up. His mind was muddled and he couldn't quiet remember why he was on the ground.
"Yeaaah... suuure."
"We're in a hospital. We should mind our manners", Jasper said and Edward just nodded stupidly as he was pulled upright.
Slowly, slowly the calm ebbed away into something more normal as the Cullens kept discussing what to do with Bella. Alice happily announced that Bella would be much better in a bit and might be able to receive visitors after lunch. They recounted the story they were going to tell Charlie and by the time Edward remembered the horrible vision, they were already halfway through planning all sorts of precautions to keep Bela's gift a secret. He shot Japser a death glare, silently telling him that he'd get him back for that. But Jasper merely raised a brow.
'Don't look at me like that. Alice said your Bella is suddenly getting better much faster. I'm pretty sure she was in my range when you attacked me too. Why don't you check on her thoughts now?'
And though Edward hated to admit it, Jasper was right. Bella's thoughts were much more coherent now. Jasper's blanket attack seemed to have pulled her out of the mental hole she'd dug herself.
"I'll go and bring her lunch", Edward excused himself, still angry at his brother but recognizing that he'd had no malicious intent.
"That's a good idea", Carlisle nodded. "We all want to help her but we can't do that if she doesn't tell us what's wrong. Maybe you can find out more."
Edward winced a bit. He already felt bad for having shared as much as he had about Bella's private thoughts. But if she truly was in danger, he wouldn't reject any help in protecting her. He'd just have to try and get her to actually tell him with words what troubled her.
XxX
Leia POV
Leia felt lost, stuck in a horrible pit of darkness, of by the stars, I'm the daughter of Darth Vader. Her thoughts were filled with terrible fantasies of turning to the dark side. Why, oh why had she thought it was a good idea to travel to Forks, to befriend vampires!? Supernatural gifts were way stronger in vampires and that, coupled with the natural bloodlust, meant that if she ever became one, she would be the biggest threat in the entire Twilight universe! She would become a villianess, more horrible than all the Volturi put together and then there was forever and, and, what if Earth finally did discover interstellar travel and this world was connected to the real galaxy after all and then she would be a hundred thousand times worse than Vader, who murdered children and killed her mother and-
And then a big fat bucket of white was dumped all over Leia's dark thoughts. All the fear washed away, replaced by an eerie calm. For about five minutes, Leia just laid in bed, totally relaxed, smiling serenely. The world was alright and she was alright and everything would be fine.
The calmness eventually faded away to something more natural and it didn't take long for Leia to put two and two together. Her thoughts were still sluggish and slow to restart.
What had happened? She'd been watching the movie and then... She couldn't quite remember. This looked like a hospital room though. She faintly remembered Carlisle visiting. He'd said... Oh, he'd said that her father was hurt. And he'd meant Charlie, of course. Charlie was hurt! Had she done that? She must have! In her panic she hadn't realized and she'd touched that well of power inside her and... by the stars. She'd attacked Carlisle! Oh, she would have to apologize so much to him! And to Charlie, she hoped he wasn't injured too much!
Leia shakily tried to stand. Her legs felt weak but she wasn't in any pain. Her gaze fell on a crack on the wall opposite of her bed and her eyes widened. Oh, she was in so much trouble now! There might be no Em- no organized force to hunt her down here but that didn't mean showing off her power like that couldn't be dangerous. And what would the Cullens think? What would Edward think?! What if they were afraid of her now?
...they should be afraid, probably. Leia should've never come here, never entered their lifes. She would just royally mess up everything. Before, she'd dreamed of a life as a vampire but now? She could never risk it. She didn't have Be- her sister's perfect control, she would be just any raging newborn with too powerful a gift. Her sister? By the stars. Her brother. She'd totally ignored that little tidbit but... She had a twin brother.
A week ago Leia had been an only child. Now she had two siblings. This was so confusing.
Leia wondered what she should do now. Should she go back to... back home? But no, her sister's mission was too important to disrupt. Leia would just have to avoid any witch-seeking Volturi and make sure to remain human. Switching back was a last resort, in case she was turned against her will. Leia could not be trusted with newborn powers. She wasn't... She couldn't. And as horribly selfish as it was, she would rather endanger Twilight than... than her home.
The door to her room opened and Leia's head whipped around. She stopped breathing for a moment when she saw beautiful, dazzling Edward enter with a tray of food in his hands. At once she was immensely glad for the wave of calm that enabled her to sort out her thoughts and more importantly, squeeze them back into the straitjacket that didn't allow any watchers to ascertain her secrets. She hadn't thought of any names, had she? She'd been careful.
"Hi Bella", Edward made with a lopsided smile. It looked a bit forced though. "How are you feeling?"
"Much better, thank you. And please tell Jasper thanks from me too. That was him, wasn't he?" she said, smiling involuntarily. Edward really was handsome.
There was a tiny scowl on his forehead but it was gone quickly. "I'll let him know. Are you hungry? You should eat something, you missed dinner." He put the plate down at her bed and Leia crawled back under the covers. For now though, she ignored the food.
"How is Charlie? And Carlisle - by the stars, I'm so sorry. Did I hurt him? Is he angry?" she worried.
"I'll tell you, but only if you eat something", he urged her. Leia had absolutely no appetite and the food looked... horrible. But she needed information and Edward was her only source right now so she shoved some of the offensive mush into her mouth quickly.
"You are allowed to chew, you know?" he made with a raised eyebrow.
"I'm eating so start talking!" she demanded.
The vampire gave a little chuckle but quickly became serious again. "Carlisle is fine, of course and certainly not mad at you. You damaged the wall more than you damaged him. Charlie... He'll make a full recovery, though it will probably be a while until he can go back to regular work again. He's mostly just worried about you." More quietly he added: "We haven't told him any details yet about your state."
Leia lowered her spoon guilty. "Because I was behaving like a raging lunatic?"
"I wouldn't have put it that way", Edward made with a little grin. It told her that that was exactly how she'd looked but he was trying to lift the mood and distract her. And it was working. Stupid dazzling vampire charms. She loved him for that.
"By the stars, I feel so horrible", Leia sighed and hid her face in her hands. "I really messed up. I hurt Charlie..."
Edward hesitated but then to her surprise, he slowly wrapped an arm around her, stroking her back reassuringly. Immediately Leia felt herself relax. She felt safe and cared for in his presence. As a... Before, she could've never spoken so openly, admitted to her guilt and weakness this clearly. But Edward, she could trust.
"Do you want to tell me what happened?" he asked quietly.
Leia shook her head slowly. "I can't... Not now, not yet. I have to... have to come to terms with this myself first." She gave him a watery smile. "The short version is that I learned something about myself this evening. Something that changes everything. I don't know what to do about it... If there is even anything I can do about it... But I can't tell you any details yet, I'm sorry."
"My family has rigged the side of your house to look like e a storm destroyed it. So you don't have to worry about anyone coming after you for your abilities. Nothing has to change if you don't want it to", he reassured her.
"Wait... I destroyed the house?" Leia echoed incredulously.
"Yes, but don't worry about that now", he hurried to say. "I have it on good authority that your grandfather insured the house against natural forces. There'll be a generous police that will cover everything, from the medical bills to building a new house and rent for the time in between. It's nothing that can't be fixed."
Leia gaped at him. "Your family is buying me a house?" Then she remembered how overboard Edward usually went with gifts and added: "You weren't supposed to do that until after our wedding."
Edward looked away then and Leia was delighted to see that her slip-up actually made him embarrassed. Such a shame he couldn't blush. If she ever needed any proof what Alice had seen for the two of them, it was gone now. Edward was supposed to be at her side, just as she'd hoped.
"I thought you were more averse to being around my kind now", he mumbled without looking at her.
"I'll make an exception for you", she replied immediately. But then she stopped and really thought about it. The whole problem... A big fat part of the problem at least was attachment. If she got close to Edward and then somehow lost him... If he left her like in New Moon or if they got into a war with the Volturi and he died... Not only would there be zero point anymore for her to remain in this world. She knew herself well enough to say she wouldn't go catatonic with grief. Instead, she might go into the other extreme and turn into a giant raging storm of death. It wouldn't even matter if she had supernatural powers or not.
This was Twilight. It was entirely possible that she herself would fall into the New Moon trap and believe Edward dead when he wasn't during to some misinterpreted vision. What if she turned into a raging death storm because of that or because he'd left her and then she'd go to hunt him down and she'd kill him-
Leia was close to hyperventilating and it took Edward calling her name three times before she realized he was clutching her arms almost painfully.
He let go immediately when she raised her gaze to look at him and she wished he'd just hug her close and tell her everything would be alright.
"Everything will be alright", he whispered softly and cupped her cheek. "Your gift is powerful but it's not powerful enough to seriously hurt someone like me. I promise."
"Maybe now it isn't", she said in a small voice. "But what if I get turned? What if I ... If I just practice and I start shooting lighting or, or fireballs from my hands ever time I get upset or something!?" Her head couldn't help but imagine him writhing in pain on the floor, enveloped in purple lines of energy and orange flames licking at his clothes. She could destroy a vampire, if she really lost it, she was sure.
Edward looked taken aback. "Bella... Don't you realize how surreal this is? I'm the one who is a bloodsucking monster. Not you. I'm the one struggling every second I am in your presence not to hurt you. And you are worried about hurting me?"
"You have the self-control of a saint. I'm the one with the bad temper!" she argued.
"I have killed people. Many people", he confessed quietly.
He... He had, hadn't he? Not by accident, not by loosing control but it wasn't that kind of control loss Leia was afraid of. As terrible as a feeding accident would be, consciously making the decision to hunt someone down for their blood was a whole different matter. Edward had killed people when he'd surrendered to his inner darkness, to his baser instincts. That was... That was pretty much the definition of falling to the dark side.
And then he'd come back from that.
...someone else had, according to her sister, come back from that too.
"...I think I have to watch the movies", Leia whispered.
"Movies?" Edward made confused.
"Yes." It would be difficult and it would hurt but... She had to do it. She had to know if there was hope. Hesitantly, she looked at Edward. "Would you... Would you do it with me?"
"You're asking if I... would watch a movie with you?" he asked.
Leia nodded slowly, trying to ignore the big fat lump in her throat. This was important, so very important. She didn't want to have another outburst like that. If she could watch it with Edward... It might be alright.
"Y-You mean... Like a date?" Edward stammered.
Leia's mind went blank.
...
...
...
"Sure. Like a date."
Had she said that out loud?
"I... just told you I have killed people in the past. And you want to ask me out?" Edward made sure.
This was so Twilight.
(Not the right time to fangirl!)
"Yes."
Her heart was beating faster. Just a moment ago she'd been overwhelmed with worries about getting closer to him. But just the mere thought of going on a date with Edward made all of her dark thoughts seem entirely irrelevant. She needed this. She needed him.
"...okay."
"Okay?" she echoed hopefully. Edward was smiling. She was grinning.
"Okay", he confirmed. "I'll watch a movie with you. After you're out of the hospital and cleared by Carlisle and I think you're stable enough to not cause any more tornados."
Leia pouted. That would take forever.
XxX
Edward POV
Three weeks passed. The insurance police Jasper 'organized' for the Swans retroactively paid for Bella and Charlie to stay in a small rented apartment while their house got rebuild. Bella was cleared to leave after just one day while Charlie had to stay for three more before he left the hospital in a wheelchair. In the middle of that René came to Forks to be a mother hen for the two of them, doing more damage than she did good. Eventually Bella convinced her that she really didn't want to return with her and change schools yet again. Edward was amused, embarrassed and a bit proud when she shamelessly shoved him forward as an excuse, claiming him as her boyfriend. A term he had yet to reject in any way, officially or unofficially.
When Bella returned to school she was... changed, according to his siblings but Edward had had the least interactions with her so far and had a hard time telling the difference. Certainly though he noticed that she was subdued often. She often thought guilty about Charlie and worried about keeping her power under control. As far as Edward could tell, involuntary outbursts like that were not a common thing though and certainly not triggered every time Bella was upset, like she'd feared.
Edward quickly became closer to Bella during school. True, his thirst was hard to surpress but every time she smiled at him, it was so worth it. News about them being an item spread like wildfire. What had started as a cover story became a fun game of flirting, gifting and proudly showing off a girlfriend that became more amazing with every minute - in his eyes at least.
Bella was completely unlike any teenage girl he'd ever met or heard the thoughts of. At times she seemed way older than her sixteen years. When they spend a free period together or he drove her to and from school, she could drag him into hour long, intellectually stimulating debates about politics, economics, ethnics and science that made him wonder if maybe she was one of those child geniuses. Such insight into such a variety of subjects usually only came with years of studying.
On the other hand, Bella was woefully unaware of any trends in modern culture, music or media, even more so than most vampires. It wasn't that she was uninterested in it, in fact she made him talk for hours in describing his perspective on various trends and modern history. If he didn't know any better, he might think she was a 1000 year old vampire queen who only woke up in the 21st century yesterday. And a queen she was, or at least she had the aura of one. She was confident, always had a reply and if anyone stirred up her righteous fury, she could even be a bit intimidating. When the first rumors started to go around about Edward and Bella, she was met with many glares and nasty jabs from the jealous crowd. Edward was initially concerned she would be bullied because of him. However he needn't have worried as Bella made a grand scene out of scolding the worst of the perpetrators in the middle of the cantina one day, ripping into them viciously with her words and exposing them as the small minded fools they were. If there was any doubt leftover in Edward's heart it was gone after that. He was completely and hopelessly in love with Bella Swan.
Bella seemed to feel the same way. She never said it so neither did he but she thought it often enough. Edward respected her wish not to answer to or comment on her thoughts unless they were obviously meant for him to do so.
She was still… guarded around him though. Whenever she first noticed him approaching, it was as if the pattern of her thoughts subtly shifted. Sometimes it was like she was thinking in code and wrapping her contemplations in riddles. She would rarely ever think of people by calling them by their name. Other times she would think about people with the same name or designation as if they were several different people. 'Dad' was someone she worried about and was afraid she'd hurt or had already hurt. 'Father' was someone she missed spending time with and wondered how he was doing. And then once he caught a spiteful, almost hateful thought about someone she called 'sire' in her head, blaming him for all her troubles.
Bella also sometimes thought about a brother and a sister even though Edward knew she was an only child. He was sure, he'd dug up every piece and bit of information he could find about her from her time before she came to Forks, trying to find out what she was so scared of. Charlie and René only had the one daughter. There were no half-siblings either. One day when Edward asked her about her life in Phoenix and if she missed anything, Bella mentioned a best friend named Leia, someone who was as close as a sister to her. So that cleared up that at least but she never mentioned a brother to him.
After that day in the hospital when Bella had refused telling him about the source of her worries he had not asked her again. He even made an honest attempt to ignore her thoughts or focus on something else when he noticed her slipping into her 'code speech', referring to non-existent family members, fantasy places or odd references to various night times. When he came to visit her he made sure to text her beforehand so she knew he was nearby. Bella didn't like it when he snuck up on her – something she told him quite sternly the first time, after she'd accidentally tried to bash his head in with her purse.
The more time they spend together the less 'code words' he caught from her and it worried him. He knew it wasn't because she was letting him read more. The opposite was the case, she was growing used to and better at hiding her true thoughts from him and soon she did it nearly all the time. This came with a tension between them. She was guarding a secret she didn't want him to know and as much as he respected her, he was dying to know what it was and hurt she wouldn't trust him. Especially since her strange premonitions had revealed quite a few private details about him and his family to her.
That it took so long for them to go on their first 'official' date was not Edward's fault. He offered to take her to the cinema barely two days after she was out of the hospital. However, Bella refused. She said that although it had annoyed her in the moment, his stipulation of waiting until they could be sure she had her powers under control was a reasonable one and she still felt unstable. Besides, she didn't want to go to a cinema. She wanted to do a full blown seven hour Star Wars movie marathon at home. That… was fine, it was a perfectly normal teenage dating thing to do, he supposed, though he worried if Bella would be able to keep up her focus long enough to really enjoy it. Edward had certainly done his fair share of hour long movie marathons himself with his siblings. (Vampires could get lonely and bored quickly, especially at night.) Obviously, they'd need to have the marathon at the Cullen house. They had the bigger screen and the sound hardware and a lack of nagging parents. Edward didn't quite trust his own self-control enough to ask for an empty house but there would be no more than two or three other vampires in the house while they holed up in Edward's room, with the rest going out to hunt or, in the girl's cases, go on shopping trips. It meant officially introducing Bella as his mat-, err, girlfriend to his parents and siblings and not having to force himself to behave too much like a human.
On the Big Day, Edward went maybe a tiny little bit overboard. Alice had somehow managed to talk him out of wearing a suit but it still took him almost three hours to get ready. He showed up on Bella's doorstep with enough red roses to fill three vases, which lead to Charlie giving him a very stern talking-to (with a couple of death threats mixed in.) Bella though gave him a wide, if a bit watery smile and a hug that would've made his heart jump out of his throat if he still had a beating one. He played a song he'd written himself for his Bella on the car ride but hurriedly had to switch to radio when Bella burst into tears upon hearing the piece. Something about stealing something that was not hers? He couldn't make sense of her jumbled thoughts but that wasn't the only thing that set Bella off this evening. There was something to this day, something he didn't quite get, some way in which this was important beyond being a first date.
"The Star Wars movies just… They hold a special place in my heart, you know? They're Charlie's favorites and so of course I know the gist of it but… I haven't seen them in so long it feels like the first time. The last… outburst I had though was when I watched the prequels so I just… I just want you to be there to make sure it doesn't happen again. I promise I'll do my very best not to destroy your house."
That was all she would say on the matter. Edward couldn't imagine what a science fiction movie had to do with her power outburst, something that she seemed to fear was more connected to her emotions than anything else. She was definitely unsettled by something though, her emotions jumping between joy and love and fearful anticipation and worry. She even made him promise to run away if it looked like she was going to cause another tornado (he did promise but also felt guilty because he knew there was no way he would keep that promise.)
They started off their day with Esme's home-made lunch, a huge plate of rice, vegetables and meat taking into account her special diet. Carlisle was there too and they were having an amicable chat about Esme's ongoing cooking course.
Afterwards Edward showed Bella around the house. She seemed to recognize nearly every room from a 'vision' but still took her time taking everything in, walking through the house in an awed sort of trance. Edward was pleased that she liked it and caught himself day-dreaming about seeing her glide through those room with the pale, perfect skin Alice had seen her wear, joking with his family as if it were her own. He wanted her to belong here. He wanted her to be part of his life, his family.
The two lovebirds curled up under a blanket with a hot cherry pillow to keep her from freezing when she leaned against him. They put in the first movie, A new hope and thus their marathon started.
Edward watched Bella's thoughts more than he watched the movie, which he had seen himself many times before. As it was so often, they were a mystery to him. Bella got completely invested in the story very quickly, practically quivering at the edge of her seat as she mentally cheered on the heroes. She reacted like a first-time viewer to many of the twists and turns of the plot. Yet there were also many references crossing her mind that Edward only knew from books and video games and the like, stuff from the extended Star Wars universe that wasn't in the movies. It was the little things: She was shocked that Grand Moff Tarkin claimed the Galactic Senate had been dissolved but also wondered about the intricacies of how the military dictatorship would work exactly with the Moffs holding so much power at a level of detail involving so many names she must've been an avid reader of many Star Wars books. She analyzed every bit of screen time the main protagonist Luke Skywalker had as if she'd never seen him before but she looked at an assembly of the rebellion leaders and recognized every single face by name.
When the Death Star fired upon the planet of Alderaan and blew it to smithereens, she stared at the screen in mute shock and Edward was stuck by how much grief her thoughts were filled with, how much empathy for billions of fictional people, whose death hadn't even been shown clearly on screen.
"Bella… It's just a movie", he tried to calm her, wrapping an arm around her as he pressed her against him.
"Just a movie... Yes, that's right… None of this really happened", she muttered. Edward actually had to pause the movie as she started rocking back and forth, repeating in her mind It's not real, it didn't happen, it's just a movie.
Edward caught a stray book that was floating past him and put it back in its place.
"We can take a break if you want", he offered even though they were barely a quarter through.
"No… No, I have to do this. I have to… To know what happens next", she insisted.
So Edward pressed play again and they followed the rescue mission and the meetup on Yavin 4 and the daring quest to destroy the Empire's super weapon. Bella was calmer for the rest of the movie. She fondly remembered her best friend, her sister enthusiastically telling her a slightly different, happier spin on the plot. This Leia person seemed an avid Star Wars fan, probably writing her own fanfiction from what Edward gleaned from Bella's thoughts. He wondered if her name was actually Leia or if she only made her friends call her that in homage of the Alderiaan princess.
They took a break after the first movie was over. A cheerful Alice came by to bring them cookies, which promptly made Bella fall into a slightly hysterical fit of laughter because it was so normal. She loved Alice for it and told her so and hugged the tiny vampire who gave her the largest grin ever and stuck out her tongue at him when Bella couldn't see.
'She confessed to me before you', she teased Edward in her thoughts. 'Jasper owes me a new mobile phone.'
'Cheater', Edward mouthed at her but couldn't find it in him to be truly mad at her.
The Empire strikes back was a roller coaster of emotions for Bella. When Luke nearly died on Hoth Edward had to save his CD collection from burying itself into his ceiling. She was so upset it was as if she was watching a real person, a friend close to her die. Edward had to tell her ten times that the main hero absolutely survived all three movies, yes I'm sure, before she calmed down again.
Bella seemed fairly disgusted and strangely ashamed watching the flirting between Princess Leia and Han Solo. She hungrily absorbed every word Master Yoda said and mentally plead the Force itself to intervene when Darth Vader set his trap. When the Sith Lord cut off Luke's hand and revealed his true parentage, she wasn't surprised at the reveal but she was surprised at the mutilation and she was enraged about it.
"How dare you hurt Luke like that!?" she shouted at the screen. "You knows that's your son! Can't you see he'd rather die than join you! Don't do that! Luke! NOOO!" She screamed when Luke let go of the railway, plummeting into the abyss below.
At that point they had to take another break because… Well, because Bella broke the TV. Somehow. It took Edward ten minutes to put out the fire and the screen was still emitting occasional cracks of lightning by the time he was done. Bella apologized profusely for the mess even though Edward reassured her many times that it was alright. Buying a new TV was really no hassle at all.
By that time Emmet and Rosalie had arrived home and the former had a mighty big laugh at Bella's accident. They actually had a half hour long discussion about the plot. Emmet was a big Star Wars fan and had the time of his life listening to Leia ranting about how horrible a person Vader was and how tragic Luke's story.
"I mean, he's so evil! I know he's supposed to turn around at the end or something but come on! How can anyone be such a monster!? He killed a bunch of children in the last prequel, did you know that!?"
"Vader is supposed to have an arc, from someone callous that doesn't care about anyone, over obsession for a person he sees as his property to actual empathy and putting his son's wellbeing over his own desires", Edward offered. He was a bit surprised at how passionate Bella was about Star Wars, especially since it didn't seem like she regularly consumed its content.
"He just cut off his son's hand!" Bella protested. "As someone who had the same done to him at that age too! And then he wants him to join him right after!? That's… That's delusional!"
"Well you do have to be a bit delusional when you want to rule a galactic empire with just two people", Emmet said. "Or really only one, since Palpatine was pretty much a hermit at that point already and Vader was the one running around the galaxy as Supreme Commander and whatnot."
"Is that what the dark side does!? Does it just turn people insane?" Bella wondered desperately.
"I think...I think the insanity comes first", Edward mused. "The dark side is like an addiction that covers the symptoms of an already decaying mind so the person doesn't notice they're loosing themselves. Anakin Skywalker in the prequels was already pretty broken in mind before all that dark side stuff happened, wasn't he? Between the war and the secrets and visions of his wife's death… Anyone would go a bit mad."
"So he's just…. crazy?" Bella's shoulders slumped. She sounded a bit hurt even when she said: "Is that why he didn't notice… Leia? He noticed something about Luke when he was chasing him in the last movie but he doesn't notice anything about her when she's sitting right there at the same table with him?"
"Vader doesn't even learn about there being a second twin before the end of the third movie and even then, I don't know if he realized it was Leia", Emmet said with a nod.
"But why not? Why doesn't he… notice her?" she asked in a small voice.
"Well, presumably Leia's adoptive parents knew about the Force and would've given her some hints or training on how to control and suppress her presence in the Force while Luke was actively encouraged to use his powers by his Jedi Masters", Edward offered. It didn't matter right now why but Bella obviously cared deeply about Star Wars and he'd be damned if he let Emmet show him up when it came to trivia knowledge! He might not be as much of a nerd as Emmet but a vampire's total recall did occasionally come in handy. "Leia Organa would've never actively used her powers around Vader and they were bound to cross paths once or twice seeing as her adoptive father is a senator and she was supposed to also be a diplomat. The only reason Vader even found out he had any children was because he researched the name of that pilot who escaped him and destroyed the Death Star. As soon as he heard the name Skywalker, of course the cat was out of the bag. But Leia carried the name of her adoptive parents. Then there's the fact that Obi-Wan hid him on Tatooine, the last place he knew Vader would ever want to return to. But Leia, hidden right under his nose on a planet that had no obvious connection to his own past or that of his wife, that wasn't an obvious conclusion to draw. Neither is the thought of there having been twins in the first place. That's not an everyday occurrence after all."
His words made Bella feel a bit better. Edward didn't know why she was so upset – maybe because she wanted the female lead of the movie to have a more prominent role? But then Emmet ruined it all by saying:
"I hardly think that's an argument. When Luke told Leia that he was her brother, she said she could feel it long before the fact. If she could do that, then Vader should've felt it too. If you ask me, that's just a plot hole."
'Or maybe he knew and just didn't care', Leia thought dejectedly. Her upset emotions made the chandelier quiver.
"Luke and Leia spend years together at that point, Leia and Vader wouldn't have crossed paths more than two or three times!" Edward hurriedly interjected. "There's actually a comic book of what-if stories, called the Infinities, in which Luke dies on Hoth and Yoda trains Leia instead. She actually has an even easier time completing the Jedi training than Luke does, who was already sort of a genius compared to the prequel Jedi. When she and Vader meet again, his reaction is pretty similar to the one he had in Empire strikes back. If anything, it's even more intense because he's driven well past the brink of insanity by the Jedi ghosts and the realization that Luke is dead. He dies on Dagobah in a duel between Yoda, Leia and Han and-"
"Wait, Leia helps to kill her father? How is that any better?" Emmet argued. "The whole point of the last movie was that Luke didn't want to fight his father and he died sacrificing himself for him when he opposed the Emperor instead!"
Edward sensed another minor breakdown building in Bella and interjected:
"No! The saga was just depicting a darker timeline because the premise was that Luke is dead. But the entire point was that there was still hope because Leia could do the job just as well!"
Emmet scoffed. "Luke is supposed to represent light and hope and all that, that's even what his name means. Leia comes from 'Leah', the 'weary one' and she's the one that suffers so much loss. Her greatest accomplishment is not falling to the dark side and let's be honest, that's really just because she never used the Force in the first place – I don't care about the sequels, they ARE NOT CANON I TELL YOU! Leia has way too much of a temper to make a proper Jedi-"
At that point the chandelier crashed down and pinned Emmet to the ground, whose last thoughts were of shock that he couldn't move out of the way as he found himself temporarily paralyzed. The many pieces of glass and crystal merely shattered upon meeting his marble-like skin of course but if he'd been human, he'd have been mincemeat. Bella stood above the big vampire with her hands balled to fists, fire burning in her eyes.
"Stop your useless jabbering, Emmet! I don't want to hear it anymore! There's no way for you to know what could have been. Whether Leia would've been a good Jedi or not, whether it's right or wrong for her to kill Vader, what is it to you!? You have to right to judge about her!"
Both Edward and Emmet stared at the small human girl agape as she dressed down the undead creature twice her size lying to her feet.
In that moment, Rosalie casually walked by, only lifting her gaze briefly from a magazine she was reading.
"I see, someone is really passionate about Star Wars, huh?" she made dryly.
Bella went red in the face as she noticed the audience. She closed her eyes, mentally counted to ten as Emmet slowly freed himself from bits of chandelier.
"I apologize", she said in a more settled voice. "That was uncalled for. I'm sorry, Emmet, for shouting and for throwing a chandelier at you."
"Wait, did you do that on purpose?" the vampire asked with gleaming eyes.
Bella crossed her arms in front of her. "Well yes. I was angry at you but I knew it wouldn't hurt you."
"That was pretty awesome, actually", Emmet made, sounding delighted. "I thought you were just shouting so loudly it made all the glass break! But it turns out you really do have telekinetic powers."
"Emmet!" Edward hissed, torn between relief that his brother was taking it so well and a need to comfort his upset mate.
Emmet held up his hands in surrender. "Alright, alright. Leia is just as great as Luke and women rule the world. I'll leave you to your date, sorry for intervening. I can lend you my TV to make up for it if you want?"
"I really think we have enough of Star Wars for today-" Edward said but Bella interjected:
"That would be great actually, thank you so much. I know I'm having a difficult time with all this and I'm really sorry but I have to watch these movies. And if I don't do it now I might either not find the strength to do it at all or I'll watch it someday when I'm alone and I don't know what will happen then."
"What's so important about some science fiction movie that you have to destroy half our house on top of yours to watch it?" Rosalie complained and was not quite fast enough to hide a disgusted curl of her mouth.
"I… can't tell you right now, I'm sorry. These movies are just really special to me." Bella averted her eyes, then took Edward's hand in hers.
"I'm sorry for causing such a mess. Especially for Esme… I'll have to apologize to her later too. But I really want to go through this with you. Will you watch the rest of the movie with me?"
"Of course", Edward told her as reassuringly as he could. "But why don't you eat some dinner first? Esme left something for you in the fridge. And don't worry about the mess. At least this explains why Alice insisted we had to order a new chandelier last week. It's due to be delivered tomorrow if I remember correctly. Esme won't be mad at you."
Bella sighed in relief and allowed Edward to take her to the kitchen. He was glad to note that she didn't beat herself up too much about the property damage. She'd warned him this could happen and he'd warned his family and they'd all been happy to welcome her anyway. It really wasn't a big deal to them. Bella ate her dinner while Emmet carried his TV over to Edward's room and she gradually relaxed a bit.
Before they could watch the next movie, they had to finish the rest of the second though. Bella went beet red at the famous kissing scene between Luke and Leia, her thoughts incoherently repeating that they were siblings.
"Please tell me there is never anything between those two", she begged him.
"There never is anything between them. She was just teasing Han", he reassured her.
"Thank the Force."
At last the credits rolled and the third movie started. Bella was extremely uncomfortable during the whole rescue Han arc, recalling a lot of explicit trivia about the treatment of slaves, especially in Hutt territory. By now Edward had picked up on Bella identifying herself with Leia Organa so he made sure to reassure her that she'd been at the palace nowhere near long enough to go through such treatment. He also made a mental note to pressure Emmet into never ever bringing up this scene to Bella, ever. At least Bella found quite a bit of satisfaction in watching Leia strangle Jabba the Hutt to death.
The news that there was a second Death Star stunned Bella into silence and again it was only Edward's reassurance that it would never be used and in fact wouldn't survive the movie that prevented another enraged rant. Bella was not particularly charmed by the man-eating teddy bears but changed her mind quickly when the ewoks became unexpected allies against the Empire. The final showdown between Luke, Vader and the Emperor had her watch in solemn silence, focused on nothing but what was happening on the screen.
Finally the third movie was over. Bella didn't say anything for a long time, just laid there curled up against him. She was musing about the meaning of the end, what Vader's decision meant, if it should excuse anything, how the Force played into it all and many more things. Edward left her to her thoughts, content to merely caress her hair and hug her close.
"Do you think... Do you think Vader could've turned his life around if he hadn't died on the Death Star?" she asked at last.
"I don't know... Maybe", Edward said slowly. He chose his words carefully, wary of upsetting her again. "As Darth Vader certainly it would've been impossible. The New Republic was founded shortly after and they would've demanded his execution. I don't think he could've escaped that, nor would he have wanted to. But if... If Luke somehow managed to sneak him out, if he replaced the suit with something less conspicuous and they just told everyone he was a captive they freed, he could've legally lived on as Anakin Skywalker. Maybe Luke could've convinced him to spend the rest of his life atoning for his wrongdoings, by fighting against the remnants of the Empire or helping people in need. I don't think there's enough time in one human lifetime to make up for everything he's done but that doesn't mean he couldn't start."
"Did you... ever try to make up for the lives you took?" Bella asked quietly.
Edward stiffened a bit. He did not like that comparison. It hit a bit too close to home. Ashamed, he admitted:
"I... No, not really. At that time, I... I was trying out the life style that is natural to my kind. But I was using my gifts to find the most despicable of humans. Murderers, rapists and the like. I justified it by telling myself I was doing something good by taking these people out. Even when I stopped and realized it was still wrong... I didn't really make up for it. I didn't... atone. I mean, I do donate money to the needy and all, the whole family does but that hardly counts. It's not really a sacrifice if it costs us so little."
"Why did you never atone?" his beautiful sun asked him. "What made you stop the first place?" She wasn't accusing him, she was just curious. Still trying to understand Vader's story.
It was not a question Edward was eager to answer. It would hardly make him look good in her eyes.
But she deserved to know the truth about him. To know that he was just a selfish, callous person. And if he was lucky... Maybe she'd run away... His heart clenched at the thought.
"I came across a woman one day that had been driven mad with grief over the death of her husband who died by my hand. I usually made sure to leave hints with the... the victim or at their living space hinting at their crimes so the police would find out and give closure to the victims of the human. But that woman, she knew exactly what her husband had done. She loved him anyway. She was pregnant and miscarried shortly after hearing the news that her husband was found dead. His victims sued her family and she lost the house, she lost... everything. Became a social outcast, took to the bottle... Her only sin was falling in love with the wrong person. The loss of that person utterly destroyed her.
It was the first time I'd ever come across a person who missed and was grieved by the death of one of my victims. Usually, everyone just hated them. But that encounter made me realize there was no way to make sure my actions wouldn't hurt any innocents. I... didn't really have the right to be judge, jury and executioner. She was the only case like that I encountered though and... Well, she killed herself so... There wasn't really an obvious way to make it up to the people left behind. It didn't feel right either to aid the families of my victims when there was nobody to help the families of their victims. Truthfully, killing these criminals... It had always just been an excuse. I didn't kill them because they were bad people, I killed them because I was thirsty and they tasted good. And I... I didn't stop because I suddenly found inherit value in human life. I stopped because I realized I was turning into the kind of person that disgusted me the most. Listening to the thoughts of so many people, day in day out, for over eighty years now... Most humans are boring or disgusting or both to me. So the truth is, I didn't atone because I thought what I did was wrong for me. Not that it was wrong because they didn't deserve it."
"Because they did deserve it", Bella surprised him. "I get it. They broke the social contract. If you don't play by the rules, if you prey upon the herd, you get kicked out of the group... You're not deserving of its protection anymore and if you're not protected, you may just fall prey to a predator. They were just unlucky they ran into you." She faced him openly and there was no fear in her eyes.
'Sometimes it's just luck that decides who lives and who dies. I have been very lucky so far. I don't even remember how many people I've killed... One dozen? Two? I didn't count...'
Edward's eyes widened in surprise and Leia quickly looked away. He caught flashes of memories, of being chased, of being terrified for her life and the lifes of her friends, of whirling around and pulling a trigger...
Heavens, what had Bella gone through!? He wanted nothing more than to ask her but he knew she'd stop being so open to him if he did.
"Vader was driven mad by his fear of losing the people he loved most. Vampires do that too, don't they? Go mad when they lose their mate?" Bella worried.
Edward nodded slowly. He desperately tried to figure out what she was getting at but he wasn't sure what he should do if he managed to figure out her convoluted thoughts. He loved Bella. She had grown so precious to him in such a short time and he didn't want to ever imagine being without her now. On the other hand, if she thought keeping her distance from him would prevent him from turning into a monster like Darth Vader and she left him because of that... Well, that would mean she would be safe, wouldn't it? She would be free to live her normal human life and go to college and... And have random outbursts of telekinetic power and would maybe get discovered by other vampires and be enslaved into a coven like the Volturi guard or hunted down by whatever mysterious organizations she feared or...
No. Bella was safest at his side. She must remain with him where he could protect her.
"When vampires lose their mate", he said carefully, "most become self destructive rather than aggressive. Some try and seek revenge but mostly they'll just try and find a friend or an enemy who will release them from their torment. That's certainly what I would do... I don't think my family would help me. I'd probably go to-"
"The Volturi. I know", Bella made quietly, calmly. "I saw you do that in a vision, long before I met you. You thought I had died when I stepped into a blind spot the Quileute shifters created. I had to fly all the way to Italy to rescue you before you ruined St. Marcus day with a glittering display of your naked skin." She poked him in the chest and smiled and Edward just stared at her utterly baffled. He'd been afraid to confess just how deeply his feelings for her ran, afraid to pressure her or scare her off. But she'd known all along.
Bella's eyes became sad again. "Promise me not to do anything foolish like that unless you actually see my corpse or witness me burning to a pile of ashes, okay?"
"Okay", he made hoarsely. "If you'll do the same." He struggled for words to diffuse the unexpectedly heavy atmosphere. "After all, if Vader had checked on Padmé more thoroughly, he might've discovered that the babies didn't die with her."
"... Yes", she made, still very much serious. "But that would've made for a very different story. In the end, the galaxy would've been far better off if he'd never fallen in love with Padmé."
This wasn't about Vader. This was about them, though Bella was surreally more worried about herself taking Vader's path as she was about Edward doing so.
"Bella, listen to me", Edward said, panic gripping his heart. He couldn't allow her to draw away from him. Not now, not anymore.
"It is better to suffer an eternity from loss than to have never loved at all. Screw the galaxy! I mean, let's be real, the Skywalker family is the best part about that universe!" He cupped her cheek, drawing in her gaze with his eyes and making sure he had her full attention.
"I love you, Bella. It's too late to change that now. I would do anything for you. I'll protect you with my life. And I wouldn't care if the rest of humanity went up in flames because of it. There's nothing you could do to drive me away... Except telling me you don't want me around."
Bella had tears in her eyes now.
"I'd have to be... so stupid to do that", she sobbed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you too, Edward. Please don't ever leave me."
"Never", he promised, feeling like a huge weight was lifted off of him.
"If you do I won't just take it quietly", Bella threatened him, her face buried in his chest. "I'll hunt you down wherever you hide. This planet isn't that big and I've got the Force to help me. I'd definitely find you."
Edward choked on a laugh.
"Of course you would." He kissed the top of her head. "My princess."
Bella, froze for a moment, a strange thought flitting through her head.
'Does he know?'
But then she relaxed again, snuggling closer to him. 'No... He just said that in jest.'
Edward looked down at his mate in slight confusion. He didn't comment though. She would tell him when she was ready.
XxX
AN:
Aww aren't they a cute couple?
There was just Leia in this chapter - but don't worry, we'll return to Bella soon. Originally I had meant to make this mostly Leia's story. However, I found there's surprisingly little conflict between Leia and Edward, especially now that they're together. So at some point, Bella's adventures became more interesting and I reached out in that direction again. Bella didn't change much in the first 'movie' but the things she did change will have lasting consequences later on and exploring that is pretty fun. On the other hand, Leia's presence is going to shake up more than just Forks too. Think about it, not only is she Force-sensitive and a person who has the potential to be a queen and general. You can also see her as a sort of alien from a technologically advanced alien civilization. Even ignoring vampires and the Force completely, that alone is bound to make waves. Actually, I may have to change the settings on this fanfic -romance is becoming secondary with all the stuff that's going on soon.
Please leave a review, it's candy for my soul!