First mate's log:

March 18, 1974

It turns out that Mrs. Brady isn't pregnant. Bobby and Cindy misunderstood when she was talking about "an addition to the family." No, Mr. Brady isn't adding an extension to their house. Mrs. Brady's nephew Oliver is coming to stay with the Bradys for a few months, while his parents are traveling for work. He'll be here tomorrow. Peter said it'll be fun to have a little cousin around, as long as he's "not as much of a twerp as Bobby is sometimes."

Oliver is eight, so maybe he can be friends with the Hinkley kids, although they don't come over to this island much. Yeah, I'll be like an uncle to him, if he wants, although I'm gonna be busy with my own kid pretty soon.

Carol Brady's diary:

March 19, 1974

Oliver is here! He enjoyed his flights, even the bit of turbulence, because it was exciting. He even liked riding in the boat from Blenford to our island. He was very chatty and eager about the whole "adventure." He had lots of questions about "the desert island" and the jungle animals, so I guess Jack and Pauline have told him about some of our adventures here. Mike told him that things aren't that wild these days, but there are less civilized parts of the island of course.

When we got to the house though, Oliver became much more subdued. I think he felt shy about meeting all his cousins at once. (He doesn't remember much about the wedding day of course, just the cake going everywhere.) Luckily, the children were all very welcoming. In fact, I thought Oliver would feel overwhelmed with the attention, but he loved it.

I'd asked for all his favorite foods, so Alice made one of them (spaghetti and meatballs) for dinner tonight. We'll do our best not to spoil him, but it's hard not to make a fuss over him. He's a very bright, cute little boy, with glasses and bowl-cut blond hair, a bit like the singer John Denver. He also looks like Jack as a little boy of course.

I do worry he'll get homesick, and miss his parents, no matter what we do for him. But I think we can at least help him adjust to his brand-new life. And, yes, it's Spring Break right now, but I will get him registered at the grammar school next week.

March 20, 1974

I haven't met Oliver yet, but Peter says his cousin is a jinx. There've been all these accidents since Oliver moved in.

I said, "Those are probably just coincidences." I felt defensive on Oliver's behalf, because people used to think I was a jinx. Yeah, I was clumsy when I was younger and sometimes I "ruined rescues," but it wasn't always my fault. And sometimes I had good luck and made things better. I remember what it was like to be blamed for things. And Oliver is just a little kid adjusting to his new home.

Peter shook his head. "You'll feel different if he ever shows up here and breaks plates or something."

It's not like Peter has never broken a plate, or me neither. But I didn't wanna argue about it. Mary Ann was resting at home, while Kalani cooked, but I did tell my wife about it later.

She murmured, "That poor little boy," and said that Oliver is welcome at the Pizza Parlor anytime.

March 21, 1974

Poor Oliver! He's not having an easy time settling in. In his eagerness to make his cousins like him, he's been trying to help them. Unfortunately, he doesn't always think things through and he sometimes knocks things over or causes other accidents. That doesn't mean that he's a jinx, as the kids think. Well, not Greg and Marcia, who are old enough to be sensible about this. But the younger four were complaining about him in the family room earlier today, and Oliver overheard them.

I gave Peter, Jan, Bobby, and Cindy a lecture about how there are no such things as jinxes. All right, I'll admit to you that I somewhat believe in good and bad luck, but I don't think it's embodied in a person. And we went through the whole thing about superstitions with the tabu idol Bobby found in Hawaii.

I hope they'll start treating Oliver better, and of course I did my best to reassure him that he's not a jinx.

March 22, 1974

Peter told me about the "latest disasters," at his house, even though his mom said that Oliver isn't a jinx. I wanted to change the subject, but then Peter said he hopes Oliver doesn't go with them on the TV studio tour tomorrow. (I'm of course giving him the day off. He's just getting extra hours this week because it's Spring Break.)

"I remember a boy who broke his mom's favorite vase and didn't get to go on a camping trip with his buddies."

He looked self-conscious and mumbled, "That was different."

"Yeah, because the boy was older and he was breaking a rule about playing ball in the house."

He sighed. "OK, OK, I get your point. I'll try to be nicer to him. But if he wrecks BITV, I'm not responsible."

I doubt it will be that bad. Well, I hope.

March 23, 1974

Oliver didn't want to do the studio tour, because some more accidents happened and he was more convinced than ever that he was a jinx. I told him I wouldn't go on the tour without him, and I got the kids and Alice to agree. (Mike indeed had another meeting on Blenford, so he took us over and back to the big island, but he couldn't join us at the studio.)

Oliver reluctantly gave in and we all had a great time. We even got to be extras in a comedy! There was a scene with old-fashioned Keystone Kops silent-movie kind of slapstick. So we wore costumes that looked like they were from 1910 and really hammed it up. I will admit that the pie fight probably helped the children get out some of their aggression towards Oliver, but he had as much fun as any of us.

And now our Brady Bunch is officially in the double digits.