Hey everyone! So I've (finally!) seen the FNAF movie! It was honestly fine for what it was… very inaccurate to the games and the lore (no spoilers though), and definitely not a "cinematic masterpiece" (to paraphrase my best friend), but it got interesting toward the end! For personal reasons on which I will not elaborate, I approve of Mike's sister's name.

I have always at least been intrigued by FNAF. I never really got into the fandom, but only recently started playing the first game (still have yet to beat Night 5!), and hope to go in order of release date from there! Because I find the lore to be extremely complex and I don't generally do well with non-linear plots (As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner was a doozy for me in high school!), this story will be far more based on gameplay. Each chapter will be based on a night in each game, going in order of release date. Furthermore, a different character will be the security guard in each chapter; I may or may not use any sort of formula to determine who. So we'll just have to see! I'll also try to make their reactions as close to the way that I would believe they would react as possible! As for whether or not they survive the night- I don't want to kill these characters off, but I also don't think every story deserves a happy ending, so guess we'll have to see about that, too! Also, human names will be used, except in the chapter titles.

I own neither Hetalia nor FNAF. If I did then Russia would canonically be the killer! (Which doesn't necessarily mean anything for this story ufufufu) All rights belong to their respective owners, and, as always, see the end of the chapter for citations! Hope you enjoy!

Night 1- America

As Alfred sat in his office chair, he couldn't help but notice just how… creepy the whole place was. Yes, he was aware that it was midnight, so it wouldn't be reasonable to expect it to be exactly the most cheerful place on earth at this time (yes, Alfred could be reasonable when he wanted to), but still… they could have at least designed the building so that turning on a light wouldn't make you lose power? As part of the onboarding process every employer makes new employees go through, he heard something about the need to conserve power, but nothing was really explained super well… although he very well could have zoned out. With Alfred F. Jones, it really could go either way- but still, there just seemed to be something… off about Freddy Fazbear's Pizza.

Just as Alfred was pondering his career choice (while rejoicing in the fact that his employment was at-will, meaning that he could leave at any time), the phone rang. It took three rings for him to realize what it was, as he was too terrified to think clearly, but once he picked up the phone, there was a delay (which almost made him think that it was a spam call), until he heard a voice say, "Uh, hello? Hello-hello?"

Well, Alfred thought, since I hear an actual voice, there's probably someone on the line. However, he was foolish enough to answer "hello" to a prerecorded message!

That message was apparently recorded by someone (who didn't leave a name) who had previously worked at Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, and that guy was giving Alfred a basic runthrough of what to expect. He read a message (which he was apparently legally obligated to read) that Alfred didn't take any comfort in, which said that if he gets hurt or dies, the company isn't responsible, and they make every effort to cover up any evidence that they were behind it. That's shady, I'm definitely quitting! Alfred thought, feeling panic rise up within him. However, the cocky American that he was had a gut feeling that nothing could happen to him, as the hero always wins, right?

After that part about the company, this guy (whom Alfred had now dubbed as "phone guy") said that the animatronics (which Alfred did know about before officially starting work) had a tendency to move around the restaurant because of some sort of programming error, and that because of the "bite of '87" (whatever that was) they can't do this during the day. However, before Alfred could even think about what questions to ask about this "bite of '87", Phone Guy said that he needs to avoid being caught so he isn't mistaken for an endoskeleton and stuffed inside of a suit! Alfred had never heard of such a thing, and really wished that the company had told him what he was in for, and he absolutely would have quit the moment he found out just how dangerous his job really was (although it was kinda too late for that now), but the message was over before he knew it. By that time, it was 2 am- time sure flies when you're listening to a scary voicemail, right? 4 more hours; the hero was pretty sure he could handle it.

Immediately after the message ended, Alfred started checking the cameras (but not before checking his battery- 85%. Not too bad). Three animatronics- a bear, a chicken, and a bunny- were on the stage like they were supposed to be. The curtain in Pirate Cove was closed. It didn't look like death was imminent. After that round of checking the camera, Alfred checked on his battery- 79%. For the sake of conserving battery, and because he had a feeling that the animatronics weren't quite ready to think about (if animatronics could think) taking his life, Alfred decided to wait until 3 to do anything else. So he set a timer on his phone and played Temple Run until it went off. If he didn't set the timer, he'd play it nonstop, which, in this situation, would probably cost him his life.

Once the clock hit 3 am, Alfred decided to check the cameras again. This time, although the curtain in Pirate cove was still closed, when he checked on the stage, he was relieved to find that the bear and the chicken were where he left them. However, the bunny had disappeared. Oh no… is the bunny going to end my life? Alfred thought, beginning to panic slightly. Oh wait… I'm the hero, right? Heroes don't panic when life-threatening situations happen! Right now it's the hero's job to search for that bunny, to save his own life and that of whoever comes after him! (It was during his moment of panic that Alfred decided that he would endure this terrifying night, but someone else would have to take it after that.)

As Alfred was flipping through the camera screens, the entire thing went black. Malfunction? Hacking? Whatever was the cause, Alfred knew one thing- he was screwed. None of the animatronics were anywhere to be found! He tried to think as clearly as possible so he could think through this emergency, but he just couldn't! Then he noticed his heart racing (which was normal for him, as he did have tachycardia [fast heart rate]), he felt dizzy, was shaking and sweating… this wasn't good. That was it- Alfred was going to die. At least, that's what he thought; fear has a way of preventing you from thinking logically, but when your life's on the line, is your brain really going to take the time and energy to think of all possible solutions and weigh the pros and cons of each decision? Probably not! Alfred's decision-making abilities were even less existent than usual, if that was even possible. In short, he was so terrified that he could not function.

When Alfred felt this way and his life was not in danger, normally he could do breathing exercises; however, in this situation, there really was no time for that. He had to not die! So Alfred pretty much had to power through this intense fear and remember what to do if he couldn't find someone on the camera… check the door light! Phone guy hadn't told him anything about it, but he did remember hearing something about door lights on Indeed!

Getting up from his seat, Alfred turned on the light of the door to his left… sure enough, he did see the bunny leaning in! How long was that thing there? Was it seriously there the whole time I couldn't see it? How long must one wait for another's flesh? Were the terrified thoughts going through Alfred's head. Judging that this was one of those situations in which closing the door is "absolutely necessary", Alfred pushed the button that said "door". Fortunately, that was a success; the door closed right before the bunny could move any further. Dude, that was close! he thought. He checked on the battery- 50%. It was already 4 am, but he wasn't so sure about how much longer that would last, because he knew that closing doors drains your battery! After doing one quick check of the door to his right and finding nothing, Alfred decided that he was going to wait a few minutes to check the light again; nobody told him how he would be able to figure out if an animatronic was still there if the door was closed, the sheer lack of information on how to do his job was amazing! However, Alfred can figure things out through experience; he had to trust that that would work.

Taking as deep a breath as he could, Alfred checked the battery again- 45%. He was glad that it didn't drain it as much as he had expected, but still worried that he didn't have enough to get him through the night. Not willing to risk the battery draining any more, Alfred checked the door light again. There was no shadow, but Alfred didn't really know what that meant. He was afraid that if he opened the door and the bunny was still there, it would kill him, but keeping the doors open was the way to conserve battery life, right? So, Alfred reluctantly opened the door- no "bunny" there! (Pun fully intended- totally not the right time for humor, but this is just a story, wouldn't do that irl.) Breathing a huge sigh of relief, Alfred checked the cameras again- the bunny had moved to the dining room, far away from him. Nobody else had moved. Alfred decided to take some time to recover from that trauma (but he made sure to set a timer so that he didn't take too much time away from survival, which was pretty much his job at that point!).

Once the timer went off, Alfred checked the time again- it was already 5! He checked the battery again- 43%! That gave him the confidence to focus on defending himself from the animatronics, so he was glad to see that the bear and the chicken were still on stage. As for the bunny- it took him until the west hall, but he did see a faint outline, but he knew what it was. Pirate Cove was closed. Conclusion- no immediate danger! However, Alfred especially did not want to die during the last hour of his shift, so he decided that he was not going to play any more games on his phone and was going to focus all of his energy on surviving.

Alfred repeated the same tasks he'd been doing for the past two hours, until he heard something that sounded like church bells, but he wasn't in church, so that's definitely not what they were, right? Checking the time, Alfred gasped- 6 AM! HE COULD GO HOME AND RECOVER FROM ALL THAT TRAUMA!

After punching out, Alfred skipped out of the restaurant (the one time in his life he was actually happy to be leaving a restaurant that serves unhealthy food!), humming a happy tune to himself. He was going to email his boss that he was quitting as soon as he got home- that is, if he survived the drive home! Just as Alfred was going to get into his car, though, he saw someone approach him- it was his friend Ivan!

"Privyet", he said. "What are you doing here?"

"Dude, I could ask you the same question."

"Oh, I just have to drop something off at the HR office! I am starting here as a nighttime security guard tonight at midnight!"

"Wait, what? That's literally what I just stopped doing! I mean… I was just working the 12 am-6 am shift, and it's over! I'm planning on quitting… how did you already get my job?" Alfred was too tired to think about what he was saying, so he wasn't really monitoring himself to make sure that what he was saying made sense.

However, Ivan seemed to understand what his friend meant, so he just smiled his signature creepy smile and said, "The boss had a feeling that you were going to quit after just one day, so he hired me to step in! Now, if you'll excuse me, I am really in need of dropping off this paperwork, but it should be quick! Afterwards, I shall give you a ride home. You're too tired to drive, da?"

"No, it's fine. After all, a hero never backs down!" He still had it in him…

"Nyet. You are too tired to drive- did you know that the effects of tired driving are virtually identical to those of drunk driving? You are in no condition to drive- I shall drive you home, and you may retrieve your car once you have gotten enough sleep. In addition, if I were to let you drive and you got into an accident, I shall never forgive myself."

Too tired to continue arguing, Alfred surrendered. So, waiting for Ivan to drop off that paperwork and leave the restaurant, Alfred nearly fell asleep standing up! Fortunately, he didn't have long to wait, and Ivan literally dragged him to his car, where he fell asleep before he left the parking lot.

Well… that was Night One! Let's see what happens to Ivan in Night Two… also, I feel like since FNAF is something I'm pretty familiar with, the story seemed kind of script-like. I read it before publishing it and tried to spice it up, but please let me know if there are any parts that could be more interesting. Also, was Alfred too OOC? I tried to incorporate his canonical character with his role as the security guard, but the nonexistent personality of the security guard in the game seemed to take over. So I'll try to do a better job with Russia!

References

Five Nights at Freddy's. Scottgames, 2014.

Himaruya, Hidekaz. "Hetalia: Axis Powers". 2009. Studio Deen: Dubbed by Funimation. I watch it on 9Anime.

I got the information about tired driving from a professor, not a scientific paper, book, or website. For privacy reasons I won't reveal her name or the specific name of the course, but I believe it was my introductory speech-language pathology course?