Chapter 58: Is Either One the Path of Love?

The blinding light was not something Asuka expected to find herself trying to adjust her eyesight to as she found herself and Shinji surrounded by the filming walls that were set up. She also knew she could not continue to look up to the brightness without the risk of being blinded. Turning away from the immediate source of the light shining on her face gave her a view of what she was laying upon.

The mountain of dried husks she saw so long ago, when she had been forced to face the truth, were still there. She was now at the base of these mounds but did not have a view of what was keeping her pinned to the ground either. The only reassuring detail she could accept was that she could not feel anything writhing above her or threaten to crush her under its weight.

Asuka had a reason to focus her attention to the object above her as he asked, "Can you see now?"

The question made her open her eyes as soon as she heard an all too familiar voice. One that she had done everything to push away, but never could. The one she tried to tell herself was never there or mattered in her life but continued to come back at every opportunity it had.

Asuka could try to rationalize the nature of the voice all she wanted but she knew Shinji Ikari for too long to completely deny him from her life. She wanted to forget that he was ever part of her life but there was a small part of her that hoped he would reach her. How she would allow herself to handle what came next was the choice that lay upon her.

This realization allowed Asuka to attempt bringing back some semblance of what she was before by asking, "You really do live up to your name don't you?"

The correlation was not lost on Shinji as he admitted, "I didn't want to make you think I weighed you down before. But I ended up doing that, didn't I?"

Asuka wanted it to be that simple. She wanted to return to a time where she could vent all of her frustrations onto him. There was even a perfect basis for her to make that argument and he would probably accept every bit of blame as he always did.

She could not make herself face him in return but Asuka was forced to accept why she was here in the first place by answering, "I let this all take hold of me. I thought I was fixing everything. But now I'm trying to be fine with everything coming to an end."

Before she had a chance to sink into sorrow for what she had done, she heard Shinji reveal his own regret, "And I didn't do anything to set you free either. When I should have been strong enough to try."

Asuka was hoping that more of her old self was returning but found herself trailing in realization, "Like you could have even done anything... But... you were trying... You actually cared all those other times. You never hated me even when you should have."

This exchange became a revelation for the two pilots. Neither one of them ever considered what would have been best for one another but one crucial aspect neglected to allow it. Asuka had herself closed off from so many before being forced into the world as a deluded version of herself. She never thought about allowing what made her a person to be challenged before and because of this all the people around her suffered.

Shinji knew this too, and he told her as much, "You expressed yourself the way you knew. I'm the one who should be punished for what I did."

A piece of her was set back into place as soon as she heard that. She knew not everything up to now was her fault but she did not have anyone else to confirm it. Here it was being said by the one who wanted to use her.

Asuka knew this but could not find herself willing to stand again as she reasoned, "I was out there being a doll for anyone to use. Then they tried to make me run away from you."

She heard the voice of Shinji confess, "It's my fault too. I tried to tell myself you were the one for me. That the version of you that was out there was what I wanted. Instead I just hurt you worse than you ever did me."

Tears rolled down Asuka's cheek as they were both overwhelmed by the revelation of what they had done to one another. What they had become was completely changed in ways never considered before. Much of it came from long before she could have ever had a say in the matter.

Another piece of her old self was reawakened as Asuka came to comprehend the root of this confusion, "You're as weak as I thought. But I was weaker."

She could hear the sincerity he had as Shinji asked, "We're both free now aren't we? The real you is back?"

Pieces of her old self continued to align themselves but Asuka could not call herself content either. The world around her had changed so much and she could not say she comprehended all of it. Not just the revelation that sent her reeling before but the state of the world as it was now.

She knew he wanted to hear her own reflection however as Asuka answered, "It is. Everything is so different. You are Shinji. But not the one I knew."

Asuka looked up to Shinji's eyes and saw him in a state of relief. It was far more than the hope he simply would not be slapped or hit; it was the hope she finally did not hate everything. That despite the massive change of the world around her, she remained and was willing to live with any that came.

Shinji finally managed the apology he needed to make, "I'm sorry I never gave you the choice before. It should be yours now."

Fully in control of herself and aware of what was in front of her, Asuka accepted, "I guess if I ever had a choice again... Things might have been different."

Hearing this implication made Shinji ask, "You think you'll be fine with where we are now?"

Asuka felt as though she was mustering a comeback to his sorrow but stopped short by answering, "You saw the entirety of someone else before me. I didn't even let my true self be seen for so long."

Shinji knew it was the most Asuka could manage as far as making an apology at this moment and reiterated his fault, "And you're not a doll. I didn't respect you enough. I wanted to use you for my own escape."

She knew he was feeling the same amount of regret as she was, but Asuka felt herself becoming more of what she should be as she asked, "And what if I stayed that way? What if I was that perfect little doll you wanted me to be back then?"

It was harsh but it was also reality. It forced Shinji to confront the greatest regret he had even if he could let go of Asuka completely just as she was made to. Neither of them was better off having cut each other away but they could not see themselves as a necessary part of the other. Only confronting what they had done would provide any semblance of a future.

A short time passed before Shinji accepted the judgment worthy of him, "Then I'd be everything you accused me of."

This made Asuka look back on her times with Shinji asking, "Then I guess we were never supposed to be worried about each other anyway were we?"

This became the ultimate basis for the sincerest apology Shinji could imagine telling her, "No. I don't want to keep seeing you this way, Asuka. I don't want anyone to be like this."

It was not a denial of what she had gone through, it was a promise. It was a dedication to ensure neither of them would allow themselves to be harmed again. She was now armed with the ideal she would never belong to someone and remain as she was. The only change she would ever permit now was the change she would be willing to make herself.

Asuka grinned. It was not a dedication meant only for her. They were both part of each other's lives in ways they only now determined. The lives they shared did not only belong to them, they belonged to everyone they cared for. That hope extended to more than the ones they would proclaim their love for.

Just as she came to cumulate all of the realizations she had, the mountain of husks began to move. The very tops of them did not collapse so much as they began to form upon one another. The light she was supposed to find as a promise for a future was being blocked from her view.

The encroach upon her and Shinji became a haunting reminder of her time in the belly of Maelstrom. How the Angels' violation of her threatened to turn her into a monster that would destroy everything she even remotely respected. She would not permit it this time.

The light that blinded her before was being eclipsed by the appendage that dragged the mountain of body husks. It became a sight that managed to summon a strength in Asuka unlike any she thought possible before. Bringing her hands to Shinji's chest, she pushed him to her right side as he fell to the ground while she stretched out her hands.

Asuka could not say when it happened but, in an instant, had the arms of Unit-02 as she reached to the gathering of husks to manage a mighty parting. She could once again see the light that was guiding her path out of the pit she resided in and was prepared to take it the first chance she had. Any challenge that came her way would not be accepted. She would not be subject to anything other than her own will and what she chose.

This was a promise she made to herself as Asuka reached for the light and proclaimed, "Shinji... You... really are... an idiot!"

Unit-01 found itself flung to the ground as the Angel it was on top of split itself upwards. Shinji only needed a brief glance before realizing it was not the Angel protruding its jaws, but Unit-02 splitting the Angel in half from the inside. It was a haunting sight that left him alarmed as he realized the energy beam shot towards his location hit Unit-02 directly where it stood. He feared that his struggle to free her would be for nothing, but another second was proven otherwise.

Unit-02 stood against the battering of the energy beam from before but stood completely changed from the attack. It stood in its original form while steam left its scorched armor from the heat of the attack. The white plating placed upon it from the belly of Maelstrom was no longer present and it had reverted to its original form.

What remained of the plates that it took from the belly of the Angel melted into a substance that gathered into the palm of Unit-02's hand. In a quick grasp, the substance changed into a massive double-bladed sword it raised to its side. Looking across the field, Asuka immediately saw the situation and what she would have to do.

Grinning in excitement for the situation she announced, "Your fun is over four eyes!"

Unit-02 rushed forward and whirled the blades in its hand as it came up to the first Angel it could reach. One of the blades connected with the familiar hexagonal AT Field but Unit-02 pulled its arm back before making another sequence of strikes. One blow after another pushed the Angel back before it was finally knocked back as it took a mighty slice to its that split its mouth in half.

The severe injury caught the attention of the Angels while Kensuke saw Unit-02 for the first time in a long time asking, "Asuka?"

She heard this while proclaiming, "Like I'd ever take this lying down!"

The Angel in front of Unit-02 was subjected to another series of strikes that threatened to cut it to pieces. As soon as it hit the core however, Unit-02 found an opportunity. It was split across the middle but Unit-02 jerked the red sphere out of the Angel's head to take it for itself.

Unit-01 took hold of its sonic glaive to give a new offensive while Shinji watched Unit-02 commit an action he only knew of secondhand. The helmet of Unit-02 snapped open as it emitted a mighty roar before plunging its teeth into the core it held. Several onlooking Angels took advantage of the distraction by firing energy beams towards it only to make it roll forward to avoid being hit. Tossing the core to the side, Unit-02 ran towards the nearest Angel in a flurry of sweeps with its blades in a frenzy few ever saw.

The sight of Unit-02 commanded Shinji's attention while he felt Unit-01 take hold of its glaive and made its own rush to the nearest Angel. His unit made a mighty lunge into an AT Field before making a slice to the ground and found the penetration it needed to step towards the Angel. Unit-01 took hold of the top of the glaive before thrusting the blade into the core of the Angel's head.

Looking out across the field, Shinji realized how the situation had reversed. Asuka and Unit-02 were free and unleashing their rampage across the field. Kensuke and Unit-04 arrived just in time to make a difference. Their combined might as a group had become enough to strike down an invasion of Angels that were prepared to overwhelm his unit. He only hoped this meant Misato would still be alive by the time he could find his way into NERV.

The struggle within NERV's headquarters was not as climactic as it was outside but key pieces were put in place. The will of SEELE was being invoked after so many delays but now met with resistance from the individuals who fought for the human race all along. Many of those resistors were only now preparing themselves for what would be a decisive struggle.

While loading his pistol, Takeshi asked the soldier nearest to him, "Have all personnel been given their sidearm?"

He was pleased to hear the confirmation, "Everyone here is cooperating sir. We should be prepared for whoever is trying to stop us."

Takeshi briefly reviewed the gathering of soldiers and NERV operators asking, "I trust everyone here is prepared to shoot attackers on sight?"

Shigeru prepared his pistol, answering, "Whenever they show up."

Misato took hold of one as well, adding, "I'll drag whoever I need to."

Hearing her announce her intention made Takeshi ask, "Are you sure about this Major? You just recovered."

It did not take much thought for Misato to assume there was more to his concern but kept herself from revealing her frustration at the idea as she dismissed, "It's a better idea than hiding back here."

Ikuko followed behind her while announcing, "Whatever you think you can pull off, you're not doing it without my permission."

Misato thought this was the point where she would snap in anger but seeing her mother reach for a gun from Hawk's holster made her realize her intention. She raised it with both hands while changing her focus to the door in the distance that would lead everyone into the halls. She was not preparing to stop anyone and Misato felt a weight fall on her upon seeing her mother at the ready.

She could not keep herself from voicing her initial protest to the idea however as she confronted Ikuko, "Mom, are you seriously thinking about going out there?"

Ikuko remained firm in her decision, "You can drop the worried daughter act. Just this once I have to try and be the parent you needed me to be in your life."

It was the closest thing Misato could imagine hearing in this moment to being accepted by her mother. In an isolated incident she knew she could not deny the assistance of anyone but the idea of Ikuko prepared to fight alongside her was a harrowing idea. The scenario left Misato with a grievous feeling at what she had to permit in such a demanding time.

Both knew it was not the right time to argue about another matter entirely but Misato still raised an important outcome awaiting them, "You do know what this means you have to be okay with now right?"

Misato found determination mirrored in her mother as soon as she answered, "I have a lot to live with when this is over. And you are not going to be dead for that."

Takeshi watched over the conversation hoping he would not have to interrupt but saw Makoto make his way up to him. "General, if you want my opinion, I don't think we can pass on any assistance we can get at this point."

Takeshi swept his view over the personnel before announcing to everyone in the room, "If circumstances were different, I would have made sure this wasn't necessary. Right now, if we don't follow that demand then we just prove SEELE's cause to be more viable than ours. That is why we cannot afford anything other than complete cooperation. It is the only way we are going to come out of this alive. Is that much clear?"

Several of the operators joined the soldiers agreeing, "Yes sir!"

Walking away from the others, Takeshi prepared to guide the charge in his fight for the continuation of humanity before several soldiers made their way to the door to the halls. Ikuko walked alongside Misato as the two prepared themselves for what would be a demanding conflict before stopping short of Takeshi's area. Neither of them would have a chance to lead the assault but it gave Misato the opportunity she was looking for to get a sense of the advance.

Even individuals like Maya, Makoto, and Shigure who were not expected to be on the offensive were prepared to give their support. Until Instrumentality began to take its course Misato knew they would have a real fighting chance in this hour. So much of what was happening left her in a state of unease at first, but she kept herself from losing her focus by tightening the grip on her pistol.

The personnel in NERV continued to gather but both Porter and Hawk were left out as one kept the other from moving. Porter tied Hawk's hands behind his back and prepped him into a chair just as soon as he regained his wits. He tried to stand up but found too late how hard his struggle to escape would be.

Hawk groaned before calling out, "Your struggle is only going to make the end less pleasant for you all."

He saw the NERV personnel gathering to the exit, but Porter shot down the intimidation Hawk attempted by turning to him and condemning, "I don't know what made you give up on the cause. But placing us all in this sort of danger is disgraceful."

Being stuck in his current position only gave Hawk the luxury to shut his eyes and turn his head away before condemning, "The choice is yours if you are going to fight until the last man standing. You only deny yourself the end of it all."

Porter heard the exit open in the distance forcing him to attention for the final charge before leaving his former partner with the parting words, "I didn't want this situation to come to this. There have already been so many splits before and this is just another one."

Turning away and making his way to the door, Porter heard Hawk leap out of his seat but fell to the ground. His ties to his wrists and ankles kept him from moving any closer or attempting to interfere with Porter's exit. He was left on the floor as his glasses fell off and looked to the distance where the others were making their exit and into the conflict at hand.

Aoi made her way to the others apologizing, "I had to make sure Kaede would not have the opportunity to interrupt us."

Ritsuko turned around to led the way down the halls accepting, "It's fine. I know you had to deal with her."

Satsuki heard footsteps making their way down the halls warning, "We must remain focused on extracting the First Child before we can concern ourselves with any other personal matters."

Determined to fulfill everything she wanted from this mission, Ritsuko pushed ahead while announcing, "I will ensure the First Child is ours."

Looking around the corner to see NERV personnel under the control of Legion making their way down the lower levels, Fuyutsuki questioned her intent by asking, "And you believe you are the best choice?"

Ritsuko revealed the leverage she had by explaining, "The base is currently inoperable without manual inputs anywhere. I am the only one besides the Commander who has the access codes to the First Child's room."

Fuyutsuki accepted the responsibility for the two by praising, "And that is what allowed us to trust you as much as we have Doctor Akagi. Take Mogami with you and secure the First Child right away."

Parting from the gathering, Ritsuko prepared her pistol while telling Aoi, "We have our mission."

Aoi followed alongside her as she entered the door to the stairway while asking, "I trust you can comprehend where we must go when we are finished?"

Ritsuko reflected on her assignment by accepting, "We acquire the First Child and then bring her to the Commander. All we need is a secure path to Terminal Dogma."

Aoi followed Ritsuko in their ascent up the stairs accepting, "They will be prepared for this. Everyone has planned as far ahead as possible."

Misato followed the leading personnel in their ascent through NERV's halls reminding, "Pretty sure Porter can give us a rundown of what we need to look for. You still have that much info, right?"

Porter recognized the request made of him by answering, "We have to locate and secure the First Child. Gendo needs her before he can accomplish Third Impact. The sooner we get between them, the better our chances will be."

As the only one unfamiliar with NERV, Ikuko asked, "And the First Child is nearby, right?"

Takeshi recalled what he knew of the base layout answering, "In a secure location not too far from the Commander's office. No doubt there's already personnel up there waiting for either us or him to show up."

Misato prepared to take charge of the advance by raising her pistol announcing, "Then we better move! And fast!"

Both Aoi and Ritsuko made their way into the room with nothing but the darkness to serve as an initial sight. Not a few feet away from them, however, was the sight of the child they had been looking for. Rei Ayanami, the First Child, remained seated on her bunk waiting for the first order to be used by her superiors.

Aoi stepped towards her to announce, "First Child. The Commander requires your presence."

The exchange of gunfire continued in the background while Rei questioned, "It will not require sending me into the conflict outside?"

"It is for a more significant development." She made her way over to Rei before reminding, "I know you have your own desires Ritsuko. But it is imperative that we have her prepared whatever the cost might be."

Aoi heard the click of a gun before Ritsuko told her, "That will be my duty."

She did not even have a chance to turn around as a bullet flew through her head and sent her crashing to the ground. Rei was unmoved as she saw Aoi's body hit the floor recognizing the gate that awaited her. It was immediately clear her coworker was not the one she was ready to harm as she saw Ritsuko adjust her aim.

Rei tried to comprehend her situation by asking, "Is this what you are here for?"

Ritsuko kept her gun aimed at Rei before answering, "I thought I belonged to him once. Good on you for deducing that much."

Her plan was interrupted as soon as she heard the door behind her open. Satsuki entered before raising her gun towards Ritsuko. The sight of Aoi on the ground made Satsuki wince at what had happened but quickly returned her focus to Ritsuko preparing to fire.

Ritsuko did not allow any further silence between them to settle as she turned around but found her motion came too late. A pair of bullets hit below her collarbone before she fell to the ground right beneath Aoi. Out of pure instinct, Ritsuko reached for the bullet wounds to keep herself from bleeding while seeing several figures make their way to her location. Satsuki was the one who looked over her as she waited for her to bleed out.

The members of NERV under the control of Legion secured Rei while she took the opportunity to tell Ritsuko, "It seems only fitting. All along you discarded the part of yourself that was a scientist and finally cast it aside when you had the chance."

Despite the injury threatening to shut her body down, Ritsuko found herself agreeing, "And to be... betrayed... by the aspect of my mother... that saw herself... as a woman..."

Satsuki looked up to see Rei being secured by the NERV personnel before praising, "You attempted to be first. That was an ambitious play on your part."

Rei could not conceive what Ritsuko was referring to when she referred to "him," but knew she would not have a chance to speculate now. She was guided past the bodies of Aoi and Ritsuko before being brought to the doorway only to be stopped. The sound of gunshots resonated through the halls again and the controlled NERV personnel would not allow harm to come to her.

Misato kept her back to the corner before popping back out to fire into the crowd. She saw another two personnel fall from her shots but it was unfortunately a minor achievement as she saw how many more continued to make their appearance. Even with the support of the soldiers making their way to her she found herself wondering how much longer the hold would last.

She turned to one of them asking, "Do you have any idea how many of them are out there?"

One of the soldiers reported, "There's probably three of them for every one of us. I hate to think these might be more favorable odds."

Misato prepared another clip cursing, "We got this far only to get stuck."

It might not have been the best decision for her to continue pressing forward along with the other soldiers but Misato had so much she did not want to lose in this final hold of NERV. She prepared herself for what she knew would be another danger for the human race, everyone with her, and most of all her baby. Misato had committed this far to making a new life for her and the boy she loved through so much that came before and what she was subjected to now. None of it was intimidating her as she determined her reason to continue living.

She heard another soldier make his way towards her observing, "It's just an endurance test for us at this point. Unless the Commander shows his face soon, we are not going to push them back any time soon."

Misato glanced at the doors down the hall realizing how close she was only to be faced by sheer numbers that kept her and the rest of the human race from achieving its salvation. It seemed to be a perfect allegory for her life up to now. Being forced to endure more and more until she could finally achieve the happiness she wanted.

Recommitted to her offense and prepared for what was about to come, Misato accepted the condition and announced, "As soon as he steps out, that's when we're getting him."

Only three Angels remained. The combined might of the three Eva units was a sight few had ever seen before and lived up to their designation as the defining hope for humanity. There were even fewer instances where Shinji could imagine he felt confident that he was about to achieve a victory with absolute certainty. On the day where he was facing what were supposed to be the final Angels, he imagined things would have been more impossible than they were now.

The three Angels recognized the danger they faced from the Eva units as they built distance between their opponents. It only took another glance for them to realize the Angels were not backing away in retreat. As soon as they hovered over the body of Da'at, their purpose began to be revealed.

Sweeping the blood off the blade of Unit-02, Asuka proclaimed, "Those freaks are picking now to retreat? What a joke!"

Kensuke determined now was the time for him to utilize the last bit of power he had in his drills as Unit-04 charged forward while he warned, "Hang on! This is gonna get messy!"

Pulling both of his arms back and igniting the drills, Kensuke threw every bit of strength he had into Unit-04. What should have marked his third kill was interrupted as he found himself colliding with an AT Field. He expected this would be the case as a predecessor to reducing one of the Angels to a pulp. It was a long time since he found himself caught by surprise in the middle of battle.

His drills met with another AT Field and used what little power they had to force their way through the field. Unit-04 did not have enough. The moment both of its drills were drained of their power was the moment Unit-04 was pushed to the ground.

Unaware of what was holding Unit-04 back, Asuka blade one slice after another on the field asking, "What the hell are you doing? We can't let up!"

To Asuka's disappointment she realized her strikes were unable to penetrate the AT Field. She threw all of her strength into her strikes only to find the barrier would not allow her to approach her angelic enemies. Seeing the futility of this attack made Kensuke give a brief laugh before realizing how dire the situation had become. The fact the three Angels waited until now to retrieve the same defensive strength Iblis became the ultimate warning the battle was taking a dire turn.

Unit-01 rushed forward with its glaive in hand to assist Unit-02 but found its effort was not contributing to its penetration. The combined might of the two units was uncompromised but did not earn them a single step forward. It was an intimidating sight for Kensuke to accept but both he and Shinji were baffled by what was happening behind the field.

The three remaining Angels twisted their tails on the ground before digging their tips into the back of the body of Da'at. One bit on to the neck where the head used to be before the other two bit behind it and began to meld. The body of the three Angels formed an elongated head with three cores at the top and brought down the six wings along the back of the body before stretching out from under the ground. It was an intimidating sight to the three Eva pilots as they saw the new form of Da'at ascend further to the air with a renewed sense of life.

The newly replenished Da'at did not levitate the same way as it did before but seeing it rise upright was in itself a haunting image. Unit-01's glaive and Unit-02's sword landed in the ground without an AT Field to meet as contact while looking up to see what broke away the barrier. They were afforded a brief window as they saw Da'at look down upon them and stretched its arms to both sides while the hole in its chest prepared a gathering of energy that took aim upon its enemies below.

Unit-01 and Unit-02 backed away as they saw the energy expel from the chest and blaze across the ground. The combined devastation was greater than any of the individual energy shots the Angels gave before as it shot across the ground to ignite a series of explosions. The three Eva units made their escape from the devastation while flames soared around their vision.

Asuka made Unit-02 grip its blade as hard as she could while maintaining her gaze on the final Angel but found the other two were not so prepared for what was the greatest challenge they were faced with. Not since the devastation brought by Ramiel had anything come close to the sort of destruction left to her imagination. She could not let herself be intimidated in the face of danger but the other two pilots were left on their own to face their opponent.

Kensuke was shaken by the attack before seeing the energy clear and observed, "That thing... It can kill us all..."

Shinji felt Unit-01 turn around before he looked up to Da'at asking, "How? How can it be like this?"

A/N: This one was a doozy to say the least. I ended up realizing how many loose ends I had and only a certain amount of space to do so. Things might be feeling a bit rushed but hopefully everything still feels like it contributes to the escalation.

I like to think the return of Asuka was at least handled as best it could be. You might have been able to guess that her double bladed is basically the same thing as the mass production Evas used. Her return also made me realize how easy the battle was about to be so I basically made another move with the three Diemay Angels fusing onto Da'at's body. Can't say I can picture it that well in my head but I hope it at least makes some sense.

Not sure I have a lot of other thoughts to add but I can now tell you that we actually are a handful of chapters away from the ending. If that's going to be enough, then I hope everyone is looking forward to the grand finish. I hope to see you all then.