When Jane woke early the next morning, she looked immediately at her hand which bore her wedding band that gleamed in the early sunlight. She had worn this ring for officially a year, yet in her heart she felt like she had worn it a lifetime. She ran her fingers over it thoughtfully, reflecting that in a year she had never taken it off, not even to clean it, or wash without it. It meant far too much to her to remove for any reason.
Her whole head spun with love as she looked over at her husband, as peaceful and undisturbed as he always looked in sleep. He lay stretched out in all the splendour of his naked male form with only a sheet tangled around his legs. Jane smiled and sat up awkwardly to pull the blanket back over him. His skin was cold to the touch, so she pulled another one around him from the bottom of the bed. Jane smiled as he stirred slightly, half dazed between sleep and waking, feeling around for her. He pulled her lazily into his arms, her back to his chest, and cuddled into her. Soon, she drifted back into an easy, deep sleep.
. . .
When next she woke, it was to a gentle rub of her hips. Opening her eyes, she saw Edward sitting beside her on the bed, playing with pieces of her curled hair.
"Good morning husband" Jane said, stretching sleepily. Her head felt groggy from sleep.
"Good morning, my love" he said, planting a soft kiss on her forehead. "Thank you for the extra blankets this morning"
"The least I could do"
She yawned, stretching lazily. Edward took her chin, tilting her head back and forth for observation.
"Well, it still looks as if you have been beaten up pretty badly. But your lip looks better- less swollen. Lets see about that leg"
He pulled back her nightdress and unwrapped the bandages around her leg. Jane craned her neck awkwardly to see, but saw nothing around her large stomach.
"Looks clean, no infection"
"All is well then?"
"Indeed, very well. Which is good, because I would hate for my wife to be ill on our first anniversary of marriage together"
Jane smiled up at him,
"You remembered"
"What do you mean? Of course I remembered"
"I've heard more than one story of men not only forgetting it was their anniversary, but spending the night out with women in houses of ill repute, not arriving home until very early in the morning"
"Well, seeing as I do not have a carriage with the horse being lame-"
A smack from Jane, and hearty laughter from him.
"I am only teasing you. But I do indeed know the places where the men you speak of go. What a horrible part of the city they are in. Grimy, and dirty, even for the very well to do who pay very well to have their secrets kept"
"You regardless sound familiar"
He shook his head, looking at his wife honestly.
"I only entered once to extract a man, whom at the time I considered to be a friend, before any trouble befell him. But why are we speaking of this today, of all days? Come. Enough time spent in this room. If you feel well enough, it is down to the dining room for breakfast".
. . .
Getting Jane dressed that morning was a worse ordeal than it had ever been. Jane felt weak and achy all over, so the simple act of pulling the dress above her head made her feel tired, and silly. Thankfully, Edward obliged in doing most of the work, his normally teasing manor regarding preferring to see her without the dress was abandoned for questions of comfort.
"Does that feel alright?" he asked, finishing doing up the back of the dress.
"Yes, thank you" Jane said, looking into the mirror.
The women staring back at her looked tired, with small cuts on her forehead, lip and cheek. Her hair was long and loose, and her complexion was pale. But still, Jane felt far happier than she looked.
"I look like a state, do I not?" Jane teased
Edward put his arms around her waist, looking into the mirror before them.
"I believe that is a loaded question for a husband"
"I'm serious"
"You look beautiful to me- and tired- and very pregnant- and a little scraped up- but still happy. Not like a state at all".
. . . .
Breakfast was a wonderful affair, mostly because Jane had regained an appetite that she had not had in days. She guessed that all the resting the previous day had done her some good.
Edward told Jane stories she loved to hear, of his travels, of bad nannies he had as a child, of foolish boyish activities. He guessed that due to her rigid and strict upbringing she loved to hear a story of even the smallest rebellion of which she was never allowed.
One day, Jane had told him the story of how all her hair had been cut off at the school when there was a lice breakout and the headmaster made all the girls do so for months afterwards.
"But why?" he had asked, in utter astonishment.
"Probably because it took our self confidence away, especially for the prettier girls. Also, probably because it kept us colder in the nights, having less hair"
"I ought to find that man and thrash him within an inch of his life" Edward had said angrily. To this, Jane made no objection, she only smiled slightly. He had always found this lack of objection very funny in a normally peaceful person.
This morning, however, he found his wife the normally happy, bright, communicative and wonderful person he knew her to be. She ate well, even objecting when he reached over to take her untouched bacon, claiming she was coming back to it.
Every time he looked at her, he felt a strong pride that was hard to describe. He was of course proud of her for everything, but the last few months had been so difficult and challenging that the fact she was here, in good spirits and as loving as ever made him stand in awe of her own strength. He only prayed that when she did give birth, she would continue to feel better and gain back her mobility. He missed seeing her stroll in the gardens, or leave for her long walk around the country.
. . .
The rest of the day passed very happily. Although Jane still grew tired very easily, she was not tempted to go and lie down for she was enjoying her husbands company far too much.
He sat in the drawing room with her and did something he rarely did- he played the piano and he sang. Jane loved hearing him play and sing more than anything in the world, but he did not like doing so himself and out of respect for him, Jane never pressed him to do so. Certain times, however, she relished in hearing him sing lowly when he did not think of himself doing it, or when he hummed in the night and she fell asleep to the sounds of his voice.
When he finished, he stood up and joined Jane on the couch, looking at her sweetly.
"I hope that has satisfied you until our next anniversary"
Jane cocked a smile at him.
"At one time, such claims of your superior voice and musical skills flattered you immensely. Now they only seem to embarrass you. Why is that?"
"It is not that you make me feel embarrassed when you ask me to sing. I do not really mind it, if you really want me to do so. It is only that it reminds me of a time when I did so for other people frequently, in an effort to make myself feel part of a world to which I did not really belong. Besides-" he said, looking to Jane, "I would much prefer to hear you"
"Well such will not happen because I have reason enough to make myself rightfully embarrassed when I sing. My voice is mediocre, if I am being a very kind critic"
"Well, even if that were true, the voice would still be mine, and I would still love to hear its sounds".
Jane could not help but grin slightly. She relaxed back into the couch, massaging her hands over her stomach affectionately.
"I do not think this little one will be inside of me much longer. I can feel you are restless to get out" she said, warmly. Edwards face glowed with anticipation at his wife's words. He too ran his hands along her, kissing her stomach lovingly.
"Oh Jane" he started, sounding soft and choked with emotion, "I never thought I would have children"
"But why?" she asked, turning on him, "How could you think such when you are someone brimming with love?"
"You forget Jane that I was surrounded by people in my life that made me feel like I was not worthy of any sort of love- not even my own. I promised myself I would never reconcile a child to dealing with that. And when I found myself in a position in life where I was married to someone I could no sooner picture having children with then a cougar or lion, well then I just knew I would never have them. I never thought for an instant, even in my quietest moments, that my life would end happily for me"
Jane shook her head at him sadly,
"Edward, so much of the hope of the future was taken away from you for so long- it is a wonder you survived it. Humans cling to hope above all else, and it was then the one thing you could not have".
"I was positive it was my punishment. My punishment for being reckless, and foolish in my youth. And then I realised something" he said, siting up straighter and looking to Jane. "All of it was to bring me to you"
"What do you mean?"
"I never would have meet you, Jane, had I not been forced to flee to Paris to escape my problems at home. For had I not made further mistakes that lead to me taking in Adele as my ward, I would never have had reason to advertise for a governess and you would have never appeared on my doorstep. It leads me to believe that God must have a predetermined plan for us, for I was put in this world for you, and you were put in this world for me. There is no other way it could have been for us. It just took me some time to get to you"
Jane's hand was already in her husbands, and she squeezed it lightly.
"No" she confirmed, her voice breaking slightly, "No, it could not have been any other way. I could not do this without you" she said, guesting around the room, "Or this" she repeated, touching her stomach. "It is strange to think I managed alone in the world for so long, for now my soul is bound so tightly with another that I know my life is not mine anymore"
He smiled his knowing, masculine smile which made her heart turn upside down. He stood up and bent before her, pulling her face towards his gently so that he could kiss her.
"I'm going to go and get some tea from Leah, alright? Then you can repeat what you just told me a hundred times over"
Jane smiled, holding his hand as he backed away until the last possible moment.
When the door had closed behind him, and his footsteps had long been lost down the corridor Jane felt a feeling she had never felt before. Below her waist she was completely wet, like she had been submerged in a tub of water. Jane pushed herself off the couch with difficulty and turned around to look where she had been sitting. The red couch was stained darker where she had been, and she felt something running down her leg. And then a pain in her abdomen, a sharp, panging pain that caused Jane to clutch the corner of the couch in pain. She could see her own knuckles were white. In that moment she had a dizzying realisation of what was about to happen. She sighed, breathing through laboured breaths. Another shooting pain.