Hello lovely readers!
I hope you are all doing well and enjoying the summer.
I have added some new characters to this chapter and I am eager to hear what you think of them. I think their inclusion in the story will be very important. More to come soon!
All the best,
xoxo
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"Mommy?"
"Yes, darling?"
"What is this word?"
Henry stood from his table with his book in hand, though before arriving at his mother's side his finger slipped and he lost his page.
"Oh no"
"Here, I'll help you find it again".
She lifted him onto her lap and together they flipped through the book, Henry nodding to indicate that he had read that particular part of the book. As had been made evident to Jane early on, Henry was a very good student. He had taken to reading and writing easily, as had James, but the younger children were still to be tried. Emmy, only three, was not interested in reading when her father was always there to read to her. In fact, on the other side of the library Edward was balancing his daughter on one leg, his youngest sleeping child in his opposite arm, and a book outstretched in his hand. James was laying on his stomach at Jane's feet, reading his own book in the light of the fire. He seemed to be in his own world, not taking notice of his siblings being read to.
"Ah, this word?" Jane asked, pointing to it on the page. Henry nodded.
"It says heart"
"Heart?"
"Yes. The prince gave his heart away" she recited, and Henry smiled, but then he yawned and her face softened knowingly.
"Is it time for bed, don't you think?"
Henry would not be tempted to resist sleep, but James would, and sure enough he turned up and looked at his mother in disappointment.
"Just a little longer, please".
"No, it is time for bed now, sweetheart"
"But mother-"
"James" Edward corrected from across the room, "You mustn't talk back to your mother".
"I did not mean to, Father. I was only asking for extra time to read".
"When your mother or I ask you to do something we expect you to listen the first time, please".
"Yes, father".
"Thank you".
James closed his book and sat up, also moving into Jane's lap.
"Sorry mother".
She kissed his cheek, smoothing back his hair from his forehead.
"I know. But, the sooner we get you to bed the sooner you can wake up and read again tomorrow".
He laughed, burying his head in her shoulder, and though Jane was not entirely sure what was so funny she was quite amused by him. Across the room Edward stood, holding Emmy in one arm and balancing his still sleeping son in his other.
"Alright, say goodnight to your mother" he said to his daughter, and in walking over to her she received her goodnight kiss.
'Goodnight darling. Sleep well"
"Goodnight mommy"
"And goodnight to you" Jane said to Peter, kissing the top of his restful head.
The boys were already at their father's side, hugging his leg tightly.
"Goodnight father".
"Here" Jane offered, holding out her arms for their two youngest so that Edward could properly wish his sons goodnight. When he passed his two children over to his wife he picked up his other two sons, hugging them before laying them back on the ground.
"Let's get to bed, boys"
. . .
The Rochester's nighttime routine with their children had grown easier with time and experience. By that stage in their lives, Henry usually fell asleep on his own and James had become better at falling asleep independently as well, his only real problem being that he turned quite inquisitive at night, always having upwards of a million questions which needed to be urgently answered before he could lay his head down. That particular night, however, in spite of his wanting to stay up, James had fallen asleep almost the moment his head had touched the pillow- even before Henry had. When Edward had checked that both his older boys were asleep and well, he traversed back down the hall to where Emmy and Peter's rooms were. He opened his daughter's first, aware that her door creaked more than the others along the passage, and saw through the thin crack of light that the door let through that she was already asleep with her back to the door. Closing the door again silently, he made his way into Peter's nursery where he knew he would find his wife rocking their youngest to sleep. Sure enough, she was seated in the rocking chair in the corner, a scene only made visible through minimal light let in by the opening in the door. Peter was asleep in her arms and Edward suspected he had remained so while she put Emmy to sleep, yet being the mother she was, she could not simply lay him in his crib without holding him a few minutes at least. He leaned proudly against the door frame, smiling at his wife who mouthed that she would only be a minute longer. He nodded in response and backed away from the door, not bothering to latch it behind him.
In their room, it did not take Edward long to undress for bed. Being only September, it was still quite warm out, and with the roaring fire in the bedroom the lightest of linen nightshirts was all he could handle wearing. Once his day clothes were discarded and he was changed into his linen shirt, Edward got into bed and opened the book he had been reading on the history of Asian religions. Confused by reading through a passage he did not remember, he realised that his bookmark had been moved to a different page, and he grinned to himself as he flipped back to search for the section he last remembered. He only made it through perhaps two or three pages, however, before the door opened and Jane moved inside.
Edward Rochester had loved Jane Eyre, if not from the first moment he laid eyes on her, from the first moment they had spoken. In spite of being intrigued by the seemingly ghost-like figure on the path back to Thornfield Hall all those years ago, it was her conversation and her mind which had seized hold of him. From then, it had always been difficult to put into words the love he felt for her. It went beyond what the power of language could convey. She felt like an intrinsic part of him, yet he was well aware that she was far superior to him. He felt a constant pull to protect her, and keep her safe, and to watch over her, yet it brought him so much joy to see her move through the world as her own person. And then, he wanted her in every way a man could want a woman- body, mind, and soul. Yet, in spite of this almost divine love he felt for her, there was something incredibly human about her- and it was this which captivated him to entirely. Her softness, her curiosity, her rich and feeling soul allowed her to live with the vulnerability which was impossible for others to possess, let alone master. She was entirely her own person, and yet there were moments in which she was unsure, or tired, or weary where Edward was humbled in knowing that he was the person entrusted to care for her. While it would always be true that she deserved more love than he could give her, and certainly more patience, he knew that if other men loved her with all the power of their being, they could not love her more in a lifetime than he could in a single day. This was comfort enough.
All of this played through his mind as he watched his wife removing her stockings, first one and then the other. She folded them when she was finished, laying them on her nightstand before looking over at her husband. She seemed surprised to find him watching her, looking once at him and then back when she realised his eyes were fixed on her. She smiled in confusion.
"What is it?"
"It's nothing" he said to himself, knowing she had heard it all before. And perhaps she suspected as much, for she turned back to her task with a slight smile on her face.
"Are the boys asleep?"
"Fast asleep. James from almost the moment his head hit the pillow".
She took the pins out of her hair, shaking the curls loose from their bun.
"I thought he would be. Emmy was tired too"
While Jane finished getting ready for bed Edward opened his book and began reading again, though he was subconsciously aware of her splashing her face with water and dabbing it dry with a cloth before getting into bed beside him. He opened his arms to her automatically without breaking the sentence he was reading so that she could crawl inside of his embrace and rest her head on his chest. He placed his hand in her lower back, cradling her as her breathing became deeper and steadier. It was silent for so long, in fact, that he wondered if his wife had fallen asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he awkwardly struggled to turn the page of his book with one hand, but then Jane reached up and turned the page for him. When he looked down at her he could see that she was observing him curiously and he furrowed his brow.
"Have you ever tried growing a beard?" she asked, and the question was so unexpected that Edward laughed.
"Once, when I was a much younger man".
"And?"
"And the result was hideous".
"A mustache?"
"That was rather worse"
"Really? I think you would look handsome with facial hair"
Edward laid down his book again and turned so that he could fully face her.
"Are you saying that you'd like me to grow it out again just for you to see?"
She chuckled a little sleepily.
"I am just curious"
"You need not have that cheeky look on your face, Jane" he said, taking her chin gently between his finger and thumb, "I know you think that you are right."
"I am always right when it comes to you" she whispered, leaning in to kiss his lips briefly. The kiss was innocent at first, but as it deepened something changed, and she grew hesitant as some other, and more intrusive thought crossed her mind. When the kiss broke, he tilted her face up to his so he could read her expression.
"What's wrong?" he asked, brushing some of the hair from her forehead.
"Something that has been on my mind since we left the Eshton's house a few days ago. It is not important"
"Tell me" he encouraged, rubbing her lower back.
"It was just a comment Emma made. A comment which, in it's fairness, has highlighted something we should have done a long time ago".
He raised his eyebrow.
"She suggested a use for Lady Denver's old home, or a potential use, and I felt somewhat embarassed. It has been nearly six years that that house has just been sitting there and I feel guilty that we have not put it to some use and that other people are now beginning to comment on it"
The shell of Lady Denver's once grand estate had indeed been sitting empty for the past six years. Though they had never stopped looking, the Rochesters had never found the right use for it. There had been one man, several years before, who had expressed an interest in buying the house for the artwork, furniture, and valuables inside, but purchasing the place simply to strip it of all of Lady Denver's belongings and family heirlooms had felt wrong, so they had turned down the offer. Not having any other interest expressed for the place since, Edward had done all he could to employ local men on the grounds, mostly cultivating and harvesting the crops which continued to grow there and renting out the land's houses for their families to live in. The profits made from the estate had been given back into the community through trusted local shopowners whom Edward gave money to in order to help those in need where they saw fit. For the most part the Rochester's had been pleased with this system, but they both knew it was not enough.
"I know, darling" Edward responded, "And I know Ms Clarke meant well in suggesting whatever cause she did, but assigning a new purpose to a very old and large estate is more complicated than simply giving it away. That house is simply not suitable for most causes or people"
"Perhaps we just sell it then? Put it back on the market?"
"We could" he acknowledged, "But I do not think there would be a buyer in this area who has the fortune or the desire for such a substantial and imposing place. Anyone with that sort of money will already have estate houses, probably in the plural, and would not be in want of another"
"Then we could sell for a reduced rate? Use whatever money we can generate to fund a cause which is important to us?"
"It doesn't work like that, darling. The solicitor would never allow it, and anyone who could afford to buy the house only at that reduced rate could not afford the upkeep of the house, the servants, or the staff to keep it running"
"Oh yes", she said thoughtfully, "I see"
"We were left with a rather unique problem in acquiring the house in the way we did. I am uncomfortable with all of the money and assets just sitting around not doing any good, but the right solution has just not presented itself yet. We will find it, I swear to you".
"Can we, then, put a little more effort into trying to find that solution?" Jane asked softly, "I know you are busy, but I also know this is important to us both".
"Yes" he answered simply, "I promise you that I will dedicate more time to it in future".
Jane reached up to kiss his jaw.
"Thank you. So, where does one look for a charitable purpose for a large, abandoned estate house?"
Edward laughed,
"You let me worry about that"
"But I want to be involved" she objected, "I do not want to put extra strain onto you without being able to offer my help".
"You wouldn't be putting more strain onto me, and I welcome any help I can get. But I will likely have to travel to London to generate some interest in the property, and that will mean being away from you all, for a little while at least"
Jane sighed,
"Can Eshton not put out the word for you when he is next in town? Have those who are interested write to you?"
"There is too much at stake for sending out our errand through word of mouth alone. If we are to truly find a purpose for Lady Denver's money that is meaningful then I must see to it myself".
"Then we will all come with you, for I do not wish for us to be apart".
"I was hoping you would say as much", he smiled, drawing his wife's mouth close to his but not pressing his lips to hers, "Because I am not sure I could manage being away from you all for that long".
She cupped his face, her thumb smoothing his cheekbone.
"I love you".
"I love you too".
Edward lay back against the pillows and sighed, throwing his free arm above his head and closing his eyes.
"I believe I am more tired than I thought. I truly am becoming an old man"
"Go to sleep then, darling" Jane encouraged, stroking his side soothingly, "You've had a long day, and if I am to feed you your breakfast tomorrow, and your lunch and dinner before getting you tucked into bed for seven, I will need my strength as well".
"Be quiet you" he growled, and without opening his eyes he turned his lips into her hair, kissing her before sliding into sleep.
. . .
"I cannot believe that at one time I swore I would never marry"
Laying amongst the blankets, her face pressed into the duvet, Jane could only see the sun expanding over the horizon through one of her eyes. The light it bathed the room in was soft and orange, and feeling utterly relaxed and at peace in the wake of several hours of early morning lovemaking, she experienced the warmth of it upon her face more poignantly than she normally would have. Edward, who was tracing the line of her back paused.
"Did you? Why?"
"I was convinced I would never receive an offer of marriage I could accept after the one you gave"
Edward continued his tracing as he listened,
"I knew that most men would expect me to be obedient, and obliging, and unaffected by my own emotions and I knew I could never live a happy existence in that way".
There was silence between them, but a busy one. Jane could almost hear the sheepish smile in her husband's voice.
"I remembered something the other day that I had not thought of in a long time. It was a darker thought which I held onto in darker times. Now I fear it is rather amusing"
His wife turned onto her back curiously, looking up at him.
"What?"
He looked at her until, seemingly amused, he dropped his gaze.
"When you left me, and when I had accepted that I would never again know you in this life, I was constantly torn between two contrasting desires. I knew a man was sooner than later going to find you, and recognise you for the talented creature you are, and want to have you as his own, and the thought of another man holding you, and touching you, and even looking at you made my skin burn".
Jane furrowed her brow.
"Jealousy does not suit you, Mr Rochester".
"Well" he said, bending to kiss between her breasts, "I was a different man then".
Smiling submissively, she allowed him to continue.
"On the one hand I wanted you to be happy again with whoever that other person was, even though the thought was like a knife to my stomach. On the other hand, I prayed that you would prove too much for him to handle- that you with all of your independence, spirit, and strength of character would overwhelm him. And I wanted you to make him regret his choice, because I wanted to sit from afar and say 'you were not worthy of her, you could not be to her what she needed' as the person who had always loved you for all of those things".
Jane felt the corner of her mouth reluctantly curling.
"It would not be right to wish such a thing".
"No, which is why I was always brought back to my first thought. Your happiness is everything to me. I would have wanted that for you above all else".
"Mmm" she breathed, reaching up to touch his arm, muscular from a summer of labour around the estate. "Well, you know very well why I married you- or why, much before that, I was so drawn to you as I never could have been drawn to someone again. I knew you never would have expected obedience, or submission, or cold unaffectedness from me, nor would you have wanted it".
"No" he said softly, "No, certainly not. Though what made you so irresistible to me was your unwillingness to give into such, even if it had been expected of you. I had never met a woman like that before".
"I fear it is not within my nature to be obedient to men".
"Mmm" Edward said, his tone instantly contesting, "Though, I would have found it hard to believe before we were married that there are times where I find you to be very obedient".
Jane blushed, but her eyes narrowed.
"You know, I take it all back. I really married you because I imagined how good you would look after a summer of hard labour- toned and tanned and naturally strong- and I could not resist it"
"That is a very unlikely story, Ms Rochester"
"Is it as unlikely as imagining the Jane Eyre who arrived at Thornfield Hall currently laying in her old masters' bed, quite naked?".
"Oh, that is not difficult for me to imagine at all" he contested easily, moving over her and biting back a grin, "I wanted it then as much as I do now".
"Edward!" Jane chastised, stopping his kiss. "That is very wrong to say of your old governess"
"Well, you weren't my governess, and I am a man"
"Oh, I am well aware. I am never afforded the opportunity to forget".
"Good. That is the way it ought to be".
Edward leaned in again, and Jane allowed him to kiss her low and slow before he lay down beside her. The moment their lips parted Jane moved her legs over her husband's so that her bottom rested on his thighs. The position made her feel safe and secure and as close to him as she could be.
"How are you sweetheart?" he asked softly when Jane's eyes closed sleepily.
"I'm a little cold" she responded, cuddling into his frame.
"Are you? Here"
He retrieved the blankets from the bottom of the bed and pulled them up around her.
"Thank you"
"Is that better?"
"Perfect".
Somewhere a bird was chirping in a tree.
"What time is it?"
"It is time to get up, I'm afraid".
Edward groaned,
"No"
"Yes".
Furrowing his brow, he craned his neck to assess the time for himself.
"We have at least another half an hour to rest and am not rising until I hear the children's feet in the hall- even then they may be on their own".
"Very well" Jane whispered, stroking his hair in what she knew was a relaxing rhythm to him.
"You sleep a little while longer too. I fear you do not get enough rest as it is".
She kissed his forehead,
"You need not worry about me"
"You are my wife, I will always worry about you".
"Then you should think only of how unreasonably happy I am".
He opened his eyes and looked at her for a long moment, grinning with eyes so crinkled with happiness she was in no doubt of his ease and peace of mind.
She wrapped herself into his embrace by pulling his arm around her and tucking it under her chin, sighing happily.
. . .
When the breakfast had been cleared away several hours later, Jane and the children went into the sitting room so that Edward could finish some estate work in his study.
Henry and James had been given a train set to share some several weeks before and both had been very occupied ever since. Peter and Emmy, on the other hand, sat with their mother on the couch, Emmy sketching while Peter was rocked in Jane's arms. Usually he was a little more energetic in the morning, but that particular morning he had fussed a little bit and then just wanted to be held. Emmy was sitting beside her mother, legs outstretched, while Jane bounced her son on her lap.
"Mommy, look"
"Oh that's lovely, Emmy. What is that a picture of?"
"A flower" she said simply, and in knowing what it was meant to be, Jane could just barely make out the shapes of petals.
"It is beautiful. Is it a flower you saw in the garden?"
"Yes, with father"
"Fwower" Peter repeated in his small voice, shaking his hands in excitement.
"Yes, darling. Emmy drew a flower, that's right".
His sister turned to look at him and smiled.
"Look Peter"
He reached for the pencil she held and grabbed it from his hand, though luckily she did not get upset. Instead, she turned over the paper so that he could scratch his own scribbles on it.
Jane kissed her daughter's cheek,
"That is very kind of you, Em"
At that moment footsteps could be heard moving along the corridor before a voice stopped them in their tracks.
"Mr Rochester, sir. Shall I bring the horses round now?"
"Thank you, Walters. Let me check with Ms Rochester first"
"Mommy" Henry said inquisitively, "Where are you and father going?"
"I was not aware we were going anywhere" she replied honestly, and a moment later Edward rounded the corner, his face lighting up when he saw all of his children.
"Now, is this not a happy sight," he asked as Emmy climbed off the couch and James raced to his side. Peter remained in Jane's lap but waited eagerly for this father to approach. Edward picked James up in his arms and held Emmy by the hand as he advanced toward his wife, and in a moment Henry had abandoned his train set and also moved into his father's side. The whole scene made Jane's heart swell.
"Darling, did I forget to tell you of the housecall I was making today?" Edward asked, bending to kiss the top of her head.
"I think you did" she replied, looking at him skeptically, "Who is it for?"
"We do not know them yet. They are two new gentlemen moved into the neighbourhood only last week. I would have paid them a visit sooner except they have been exceptionally busy unpacking, so I was told. They have invited us both for tea this afternoon".
"But Edward, the children-".
"I know. Jenny and Grace both volunteered to watch them for a few hours- most enthusiastically I might add. And perhaps Adele will be returned before then anyways".
Jane did not like leaving her children at home- not because she did not trust their wonderful staff to care for them, but because there were so many of them, and only a few years apart in age. It was a lot to handle, and their servants were not expected to do such. Then again, Jane was reminded that she and Edward had recently spoken about wanting to give their children a deeper sense of independence so that if they ever did need to be away from them for a little while, for whatever reason, they would not be inconsolable.
"Could I speak with you alone for a moment, Edward?".
"Of course. Children, would you go over there and play over there for a few minutes so your mother and I can talk?".
He laid James on the ground and released Emmy's hand. Henry took his younger brother by the arm and guided him towards their toys, James pulling his sister gently behind him. Soon their children's laughter was ringing throughout the room, and Jane turned to her husband now leaning against the arm of the couch.
"I am struggling a little with the idea of leaving them home alone".
"I know you are" he said understandingly, "But we spoke about this just the other day".
"I know we did. The kids need to be comfortable with one of us not constantly being around, for there are sure to be times in the future that such is the case, and I do not want them to be unnecessary upset for no reason".
"Well then, today is perhaps a good opportunity to try such, for we will not be gone more than a few hours at most. They will have each other to play with, and they are all so fond of Jenny and Grace. Things will be absolutely fine".
Jane nodded, crossing her arms as she considered.
"Then again, I do not want you to be unhappy while we are away-"
"No, I will be well enough. It is important to do what is best for the children".
Edward approached her, putting his hands on either side of her hips and kissing her lips briefly.
"I love you, do you know that?"
Jane squinted suspiciously
"Speaking of, why are you rather insistent upon me accompanying you today?"
"I just told you, I'm in love with you".
Jane pulled in her lips.
Edward went to speak, but his look was suddenly more serious than Jane was expecting- more conflicted and unsure. He was leaning beside her, but she stepped forward so that she could read his face more clearly.
"In truth, I want you to come because I want the men to know that they will have friends in the neighbourhood".
"But of course they will make friends, Edward. They have only just arrived-"
"No, it is a little more complicated than that" he said softly, "They may make some friends, but they are sure to make some enemies too".
More confused than ever, Jane simply stared at her husband. He sighed,
"The two men are lovers, Jane, not the business associates they claim to be".
"Oh" she said in surprise, "Oh, I see".
He waited for her to speak again, and when she looked up at him she was surprised by the look on his face.
"What is it?"
He hesitated,
"I was unsure if you had ever known a single-gendered couple before"
"No" she replied simply, "Or if I have, I did not know so at the time"
"Then you do not mind?"
She was thoughtful a moment,
"No, I do not mind"
Edward's face broke into a relieved yet unsurprised smile,
"But you know how others will feel? You know what will be said?"
"I do. I imagine a lot of people are afraid of what they do not understand. I am just surprised they live in such an open way? It was my understanding that these things are normally kept somewhat quieter?"
Her husband nodded,
"It is not exactly common knowledge, though I believe it is greatly suspected which is why the men were forced to leave Bath. Eshton knows of them and was told from someone who knows them quite personally that they have lived together for quite a long time".
"Well then I wish them nothing but a peaceful and happy life here. We all deserve peace of mind, and I hope this is a fresh start for them".
Edward stood and pulled his wife into him, kissing her cheek and then her forehead.
"You never fail to surprise me"
"Why? Did you think I would not be comfortable meeting the men knowing they had a relationship with one another?"
"Well, no. You are too loving of a person for that. But I would have understood if the relationship was something rather foreign to you".
"It is, I suppose" she smiled, "Though it is not something which is difficult to understand. I suppose most of my knowledge of single gender couples comes from stories in the ancient world- of Grecian gods and their teachers".
Edward chuckled,
"Well, thankfully men who share relationships with one another are often less complicated and dramatic than greek myth would have one believe".
"Do you know this from your travels?"
"Yes, though also from friends I knew in university and some I still know in town. Such relationships never bothered me. I never felt they were my concern. Besides, God knows I do not deserve you. What right have I to judge what another man deserves?".
"You deserve every good thing you have ever known" Jane assured her husband softly, reaching up to touch his cheek. She admired Edward for many things, but one of them was his openness to life in all its many forms. He certainly had his own feelings, own tastes and own experiences, but he never judged others for theirs. It made him approachable, and people felt drawn to him for his understanding nature.
"Jane Eyre," he whispered, pulling her closer to him, "Jane Eyre, I love you"
"I know" she soothed, "I know you do. You don't have to tell me".
"I want to, every moment for the rest of our lives. I'll never grow tired of expressing it".
Jane stepped back until she bumped into the table behind her, and had the children not been present, their laughter and voices loud and playful, she knew that he could have lifted her on top of it. Instead, he stood with his back to the children, smiling at her in his own uniquely intoxicating way.
"The things I would do to you right now if I could".
Jane laughed as he kissed her cheek,
"So soon after this morning?" she asked lowly
He looked curiously look at his wife,
"Please, Jane".
"What?"
He was now looking at her with an almost baffled expression.
"Jane, love, if we could spend our entire day in bed together, I would make love to you in all the ways two people can be together and still want more. You are agonizingly moreish".
His lips found her jaw and tickled her skin, and though Jane laughed the tip of his tongue tracing her skin sobered her instantly.
"Oh Edward, don't"
"No?"
"No"
"Welcome to my world" he breathed in her ear before walking away briskly, biting back a smile as he approached their children who had seemingly forgotten their existence.
"Come now and say goodbye to your mother and I. We have to leave for a little while".
"Why?" Emmy asked, looking surprised.
By this time Jane was at her husband's side, smoothing the top of her daughter's hair.
"Your father and I have someone we must visit. We will be gone for a few hours but Jenny and Grace are going to keep you company. Do you think you can be good children while we're away?"
Henry, James, and Emmy all nodded, but Peter's lip quivered and he began to cry. Jane looked to her husband, her own resolve flickering, but he picked up his son and bounced him lightly in his arms.
"Peter, we will not be long, and you will have your brothers and sister here with you. You can be a good boy, can't you?"
. . .
Half an hour later, and several crying tantrums later, the Rochester's left for the Gentleman's house feeling slightly flustered from the departure. Teaching the children independence was the right thing to do, and Jane and Edward had always recognised that a consequence of raising their children on their own would be a closeness which would make time apart more difficult, but it had still been very hard to leave with Peter settled, but still upset.
"Go on Miss" Jenny had encouraged, "My brother was the same way. Peter will be well again when you're gone and happy to see you when you return".
So they had left, and after some words of encouragement from Edward, Jane also settled.
The carriage ride to the gentlemen's house was shorter than Jane expected it to be, yet it was longer than she would have anticipated if she had known the exact location of the house. They resided in a particularly beautiful part of the county close by where mansions were smaller yet full of ancient character. Jane watched with interest as they drove past several homes and then their smaller cottages attached to the property several miles away and imagined how such might have been the kind of place she would have lived in had her life taken a different path, had she not returned desperate to see if her old master was alive and well all of those years ago.
It was an intriguing thought, but then again it was difficult to imagine what that life or any other alternative life would have looked like. Not in that it was a difficult reality to conceptualize, for Jane and always expected her life to be humble and simplistic, but it was difficult to imagine a world where she wasn't the wife of Edward Rochester and mother to Henry, James, Emmy, and Peter. Though she had always been her own person, they were her world. To not have them would have been no life at all. And yet, the truth was that if she had indeed ended up renting one of these cottages from a large estate house where a rich family visited for perhaps a few months of the year, she never would have known what she was missing out on. She never would have known the joys that her family infused life with, so she would not have known to grieve them. She only would have known a different kind of contentedness which she perhaps would have mistaken for happiness, yet whatever feelings she experienced in that solitary cottage, it would not have been joy.
"Strange, isn't it?" Edward asked with the transparency which allowed him to see straight through into her thoughts. "Strange seeing how wide the world is, even in our small corner of it. How many different ways it all could have ended up".
Jane smiled softly,
"Yes. But does that mean you do not believe that God brought me to Thornfield Hall and brought you home so that we could be together?"
"I believe that something divine was present in your creation, and in our children, so I suppose I must. It all just seems so unbelievably unlikely that we would find each other without his help"
"Mmm" Jane conceded, "But then again, what if you or I had made even one different decision different to what fate had planned? What if my letter advertising to Thornfield Hall had been lost in the mail? What if you had been delayed in returning from Europe? How differently everything would have been."
Edward, with a knowing smile, took Jane's chin between his finger and thumb and kissed her gently and she could not help but move a little closer to her husband, crossing her legs and looking out his window at the fields surrounding them as she took his hand in hers.
"Is that what was on your mind just now as you looked so pensive?"
"I was just thinking about how, if fate had not intervened in my life, I should have been living in one of these little cottages on my own, teaching in a nearby school, and I would have been content and perhaps even happy to my own understanding of what happiness was, but knowing what I do now of life I would never have known true joy".
"You know" Edward began, stroking his thumb over her knuckles, "I had a similar experience the last time I was in London. I passed by a house I once considered purchasing a long time ago when I couldn't imagine living out the rest of my life in Thornfield Hall. I remembered the parties I imagined throwing there, the people who would come in and out of the threshold, the habits I could engage in which would allow me to forget. I was very close to buying it, but something in me would not allow it. It was not practical for a man with an estate as I had, and my old conservative habits of managing money would not give way. Still, when I passed the old place it gave me reason to pause. I had not seen it in so long, and it has been so long since I needed that kind of escapism in my life that I simply forgot. I nearly walked by it without a second thought".
"That wouldn't have been a bad thing. It is one thing to forget your past, it is another thing to no longer be troubled by the things which once weighed on you".
"Exactly" Edward said, "And I love you for freeing me of all of it".
"Oh, Is that why you love me?"
"That is one of the reasons"
"And here I was thinking it was my jam"
"Jane darling?"
"Yes?"
"That jam was terrible".
She grinned, and then laughed at the look of remembrance on her husband's face.
"It is possible that I mixed up the salt and the sugar. I cannot be entirely certain, for Ms Mullings wouldn't try it".
"Then I was the only one subjected to it, was I?"
"I believe you were".
The corner of his mouth turned up
"Well, my darling, I suppose it does not matter that you cannot cook, for you have such a talent for-"
Jane raised her eyebrow in warning,
"I was going to say, well, never mind what I was going to say".
"I know that look, Edward Rochester. I know what you were going to say"
"Do you?"
"Yes"
But the answer he spoke lowly into her ear made her blush instantly, and she bit back an embarrassed grin.
"Didn't think so" he smirked.
Before Jane could chastise him, however, the carriage suddenly took a sharp turn and began heading down a rather short drive with a sizeable house at the end of it. It was a three-storey, dark brick mansion covered in white windows laid symmetrically along the facade. What was more striking, however, was a rather large statue of Poisioden lounging with his trident while holding a jug of water which poured liquid stone down over the rock he rested on.
Edward laughed the moment he saw it,
"How fitting" he said, smiling as the carriage came to a stop and the coachman rushed forward to open the doors.
As Edward walked out and turned to help his wife down, Jane had a view of the two men stepping out of their home for the first time. One looked rather eager to say hello, not entirely motionless as he stood still on the steps. The other looked more formal, evidently bent on formalities of greetings. The younger, and seemingly more eager, had light blonde ringlets, almost white, and was rather tall and lean. The other must have been somewhat older, perhaps by ten or fifteen years, and was beginning to grey, though his trim form and still-dark-in-places hair and beard suited him.
She took her husband's hand and was helped down from the carriage, aware for the first time that perhaps she should have changed into something more formal. In truth, it had been so long since she had met a new acquaintance that it had not occurred to her upon leaving the house that she should have dressed up, or perhaps put more effort into her hair. When they were quite alone and ascending the steps, Jane mentioned it quietly to her husband.
"I thought you looked rather pretty today" was his soft reply, and Jane sighed. As if he would have said anything else.
"Mr Rochester, Ms Rochester, how glad we are to meet you at last" the younger of the gentlemen said, clearly no longer able to contain his excitement at meeting new people. Jane could not help but smile. She liked him instantly.
"We are very glad, indeed, to make your acquaintance" the older man continued slightly more formally, "My name is Richard Ross. May I introduce my friend and business partner Leslie Douglass".
"Mr Ross, Mr Douglass, it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Please allow me to introduce my wife, Jane Rochester".
"It is very good to meet you" she said, smiling and curtsying as they bowed politely.
"A pleasure, ma'am. We have heard much about you and your family".
"Yes" Mr Douglass said, "And have you brought the children today?"
"Not today" Edward smiled, "I fear that four children piling into this home would be overwhelming for anyone and could cast us in a very poor light upon first meeting".
"I heard your children are quite well-behaved and respectful, actually" Mr Ross said matter-of-factly, "In fact, there is nothing but positive words of your whole family from every person we've met. It is quite an achievement in society to be stainless".
Jane and Edward laughed together.
"You must not have been speaking to the right people" he argued,
"Oh no, we've been speaking with all the people we can" Mr Douglass assured them, "It is equally thrilling and intimidating to be in a new place with entirely new people".
"Mr Rochester, do you hunt?" Mr Ross asked, evidently not interested in the conversation Mr Douglass was proposing.
"I do, on occasion. Though I prefer the study of the natural world" he replied, stepping forward into some unknown room with Mr Ross, but when Jane turned back to Mr Douglass so that his comment did not go unrecognised, Edward released her hand which had been guiding her forward.
"I hear that you moved from Bath. Is that right?"
"Yes, indeed".
"I hear it is a lovely city, though I have never been myself. How have you found life here in the countryside?" They stopped walking, and suddenly Mr Dougless looked hesitant. The look of uncertainty did not suit him.
"Ms Rochester-"
"Please, call me Jane".
"Jane, then" he smiled, "I do hope that we may be honest with one another, in spite of us having no reason to be so informal with one another"
"I would like to think that I share honesty with all of my friends".
"Well then, I hope you will not think me presumptuous or forward in what I will say next".
He looked forward to where Mr Ross and Mr Rochester were standing in front of a large window before looking back at his companion.
"Well, we have been in contact with a Mr Eshton, only briefly, but he is a forward thinking man, I believe, and he said that he knows your husband quite well and that he is of a similar mindset".
"I've always known him to be so"
"Well then, I have reason to suspect that you may also be that way as well".
Jane smiled knowingly at him,
"I do hope so, in my better moments at least. I would also like to think that I am non-judgemental".
"Then you know?"
The question was so blunt that Jane could not help but look at him a long moment, and for an instant she was unsure whether or not she should lie. But then she nodded and spoke lowly.
"If you are referring to you and Mr Ross being in a relationship then yes, I am aware of such".
He let out a sigh, perhaps of relief in seeing Jane so unaffected by the news.
"And your husband knows? And yet you still came?"
"Mr Douglass" Jane began, saddened by his surprise but wishing to be as clear as possible, "As far as I feel, and as far as my husband feels, what happens in a person's private life should be of no consequence to another person".
He swallowed back what Jane knew to be tears, and in blinking very rapidly succeeded in keeping them from spilling from his eyes.
"I, um- Well, Richard and I left Bath because news of our relationship became rather public and we found we could no longer live amongst our acquaintances there. It was devastating for us. Our whole life existed there for many years".
"I'm sorry" Jane said quietly, "I am so very sorry".
"Thank you" he said, again blinking back tears. "What you must think of me"
"Please, do not worry of formality around us. We are rather informal people when it comes to our friends. It is the way we prefer things".
"Us as well" he continued, "Us as well".
"Mr Douglass-"
"Of please, do call me Leslie. I hate the name Douglass. It is my father's name"
Jane smiled,
"Leslie, please know that you will have friends here. As I am sure you are well aware, people will still talk, for people will learn of what happened in Bath, but our county is small and can be persuaded into accepting those who would not be accepted elsewhere. I am sure someone told you of Edward and I's rather unconventional meeting and union?"
He nodded, now dabbing the corner of his eye with a handkerchief,
"I was his governess. A penniless, unconnected governess with no formal accomplishments who had not a friend in the world. And, as I am sure was part of the story when you were told, Edward had a wife living when we met, and the unusual circumstances of their union many years before, as well as her poor health, stopped us from being able to marry. When she passed rather suddenly and tragically, it did allow us the opportunity to wed. Arriving here as newlyweds people talked of us too, but like with us, they will eventually stop talking of you and Mr Ross. I do not know much on these matters but I do know that our society here is not that of Bath".
He chuckled slightly,
"No, indeed it is not. But I thank you for your encouragement and your honesty. When I heard the story of yours and your husbands union I cannot say that I was not very surprised, but more than that I was touched. I thought to myself, 'if after all they went through they still married, and produced four lovely children, there must be a great amount of love there'. And I see there is. Your husband looks at you in the way I feel I must look at Rick".
Jane blushed slightly, glancing over at her husband who was pointing out of the window to indicate something in the distance.
"How did you and Mr Ross meet?"
"Oh, we met a long time ago now in Paris. I was attending art school and he was one of the teachers there".
Jane could not help but smile slightly,
"I was drawn to him for his stability, I think", he continued, looking forward at the man he spoke of, "My life was such a mess at that time. My father had thrown me out, you see, when he caught me with one of our stable boys one summer. I had not, and have not, seem him since that day, and though my family is quite wealthy my father cut me off without so much as the few cents I needed for the train. Luckily, he had already paid for this school in Paris for me to attend, and though as I said I had nothing to live on, I thought that since I had nowhere else to go, I might as well finish the year and rely on people's kindness. That is where I met Richard. He was kind to me when no one else was, and I would like to think in hindsight I was good to him too. He has a tendency to be too serious at times, but he is better in company than alone. At any rate he took me in, and we have not been parted since".
"It is a lovely story" Jane said, "A lovely story of love, in spite of much cruelty".
"I used to think of my father's actions as very cruel as well" he said, "Yet, I owe my father everything, in some twisted way I would never admit to him. If he had not thrown me out, I never would have known Richard and he is the best part of my life".
"Life is often that way" Jane said assuredly, "We owe the most to the people who teach us to be resilient".
Leslie Douglass smiled before his mood took a sudden shift,
"Could I interest you in tea, Jane? A harder drink than that, perhaps?"
"Tea would be lovely, thank you".
"Very well. Richard?"
The man ahead of him turned from his conversation with Edward, looking surprised to be addressed in such an informal way in front of company. Perhaps he knew what such outward informality meant for he softened quickly.
"Jane and I would like to take our tea now"
"Call Briggs. He'll sort it out"
Leslie turned back to Jane and smiled,
"Shall we?"