Jane and Rochester, continued

by havingteawithyou

The continuation of the story of Jane and Rochester as a young, married couple, deeply in love- beginning on the morning after their wedding night. Filled with all the honesty of marriage, including sex. Thank you so much for reading. Ongoing!

188. Chapter 188

Hello my darling readers.

I hope you are all doing well. I have missed you so much. The past few months have been difficult ones, and I haven't had the time to write that I have had over the past few years. That said, this chapter is the largest one I've ever written and I hope that, in some small way, this will make up for my long absence.

Thank you, so so much, for all the continued support. I am still staggered that so many people read and write me the loveliest messages. I cannot explain to you how much it means to me, and how much it has supported me these past few years. This is truly my happy place.

Thank you again. I hope you enjoy it. As always, let me know what you think.

xoxo

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Jane entered Adele's room, unsurprisingly finding her daughter sitting at her vanity fussing over a strand of hair which was not laying quite right on her head. When she realized who had entered the room she turned and sighed, slightly frustrated.

"I cannot get this piece to behave".

Jane stepped behind her and took the curl from her hand, twisting it around her finger in an attempt to get it to twirl in the same direction as the rest of her hair. From her standing position, it was easier to tuck the strand into the braid so it wasn't so noticeable, but by the time Jane looked back to see if Adele was satisfied with how it looked, her daughter was staring forward sightlessly. Jane half smiled, half sighed in understanding as she reached for a chair which was tucked into her nearby desk. As she placed it beside Adele, she broke from her revery in order to look up in confusion, but the compassionate look on Jane's face eased her concern at once.

Since Jane had married Edward she had always felt Adele was hers, an innate part of their family, though their relationship was admittedly more nuanced than the one most mothers and daughters shared. Even though there was only eight years difference in their ages, a maternal relationship had been the one which best suited them, in part because Adele was younger for her age than the average girl and Jane was more mature. During a time of much change when Adele had been moved between different schools, was taught by different teachers, and befriended different pupils, she had needed reassurance, guidance, and, above all else, a loving home to return to whenever she wanted knowing that in both of her parents she had people who wanted nothing more than her wellbeing and happiness. And yet, their relationship had also been complicated by the fact that Adele had known a mother whom she had loved, and Jane had also been her former teacher.

At the beginning of Jane's married life, Adele had needed a mother- someone to love her and care for her, and advocate for all the best things for her. She needed a shoulder to cry on, encouragement for the difficult things she experienced, but also an easy place to simply talk over all of life's complexities as she came to understand them. As she aged, however, their relationship had taken on aspects of what Jane imagined older sisters shared with their younger sisters- perhaps because for the first time Adele had realised that they were not so very far apart in age. Jane became someone to talk over first crushes, dresses, and accomplishes with, though they had also used that time to discuss the importance of humility, character, and qualities which could not be purchased in a store. Through these more adult conversations, Adele became a more humble person, less interested in fleeting, materialistic things and more focused on her person. Jane flattered herself that she and Edward had provided the things which had led to self-assurance, humility, and common sense in Adele's character which enabled her to become a gracious and well-adjusted young woman in the present.

Now, their relationship had matured into one which contained elements of both mother and sister. Adele was a companion to Jane, and far more of an equal to her both in maturity and wisdom than she had been when they had first met. She also loved helping with her younger siblings, caring for them whenever and however she could. And yet, Jane knew that Adele preferred to see her as her mother, as her safe harbour, and as a guiding force through life rather than simply a friend. She had told Jane before that she had become the surrogate for so much love and security that she had never known from her own mother, and that she prefered residing in this place more than any other. And, of course, Jane had much preferred this to anything else as well.

Presently, Adele was looking at her with a sort of knowing understanding of what to come, though she did not look as if she did not want to hear it, nor interrupt it.

"Adele" Jane began slowly, "What is the meaning of all of this?"

"Of what, precisely?"

She smiled,

"The dress, the hair, the bows and the frills. This wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that you have a young gentleman arriving this afternoon, would it?"

Adele blushed deeply, turning a flushed shade of red. She started as if she was going to speak, but then she stopped herself and adopted a more honest strain.

"I want him to like me"

Jane looked at her a long moment, and then smiled.

"It seems to me as if he already likes you. He has agreed to make this stop on his way home, at any rate, and as you said, it is somewhat out of his way. Perhaps it is more truthful to say that you want him to notice you...not just as a girl, but as a woman".

Adele nodded,

"It is just-" she closed her eyes, knitting her hands together almost in agitation,"If I wait for him to notice me, it may be too late. He may have noticed some other girl, or some other girl might have made him notice her, and I could not bear such. Though, the truth is I do not even know if I am ready for him to notice me yet".

Jane furrowed her brow,

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I do enjoy the company of Mr Reynolds quite a bit. I believe he has many of the qualities which I would like in a husband one day. It is only that, if he were to propose tomorrow, if he were to ask me to be his wife, I would not know what to say. Though he is nineteen and of marrying age, I am only seventeen- but then, girls do marry at my age. I feel that if I said no, if I asked for more time, even, that he would move on and find someone else worth marrying, and so I would not have a choice".

"Adele" Jane said gently, "Who talks of marriage?"

"No one, yet. But mother, what if he does?"

Jane frowned slightly and reached for her hand, steading it at once.

"You must know, Adele, that love, the kind of love which leads to marriage, cannot be built on questions of 'what-if's'. We can only ever make decisions based on what is, not what we suspect is coming or what we hope will happen. If marriage has not been spoken of, then it is not something which needs to be on your mind at present".

She nodded in relief, and so Jane continued.

"Has Mr Reynolds made any sort of feelings known to you? Any intentions?"

"No. Not exactly. Though I, without vanity, believe he does care for me beyond the scope of normal politeness. He made a point of showing me some extra attention during our stay away, though they were only ever small gestures which were very appropriate. He approached me one night as I played the piano and complimented my skill. Another time he asked to one day see my paintings for which I felt very flattered. Until these outright gestures, I had no inkling of how he may have felt about me".

There was a pause in the conversation, a thoughtful one in which Jane conjured the advice she hoped would soothe her daughter in its honesty and sincerity.

"Adele, when we are young it is rather difficult to comprehend what type of relationship marriage is, or rather can be" she corrected herself, "What I can tell you is that while marriage is long, it is this which gives all possibility to it, for time allows for depth, and intimacy, and connectedness. That said, time also allows for things to turn empty, meaningless, and unfulfilling. Marriage is about partnership. It is about creating a life with someone who will be present with you in all things so that you can celebrate the good and endure the bad in equal measure. When that person does walk into your life, it will be with such blinding force that you will be in no doubt. If this Mr Reynolds remains in your life, if he becomes that blinding light you cannot see around, then I promise you that you will not have to ask yourself if you are prepared for marriage".

Adele smiled a private smile full of amusement, one Jane did not understand. But then she looked up and sighed.

"Do you know what happened the other day between father and I?"

"No, I do not think so?".

"Well, he found me cleaning up the vase I broke in the study when I was being rather foolish playing with Emmy. I am not sure why, for I knew you would not be cross, but I asked father not to tell you. He looked at me rather seriously- far more seriously then when he learned I broke the vase- and he said, 'Adele, I do not keep secrets from your mother'. At first, I was rather surprised. I did not see how what I was asking him to do was keeping a secret. I did not think that a person could make it a habit of telling their spouse everything, especially something so small as this. But then I realised it is not about conveying small incidents to one another, nor is it really about secrets. It is about maintaining honesty in all things. And then I realised I have grown up witnessing something rather special. I do not know many men who believe their wives deserving enough to be kept in their full confidence, even over such small, trivial matters. And then, I know it is the same for you, that there is nothing you would keep from my father. That is something I want for myself one day".

Jane felt her insides warm with pride.

"I love your father very much, Adele, and that love is built on respect, but there can be no respect where there is deceit. There can also be no respect where there is no effort. Your father and I work at this marriage of ours, for as we change, our relationship changes too. That is why it is so important to enter into a marriage with someone whom you can respect and love, for you need to know that they are always worth the effort- something admittedly easier said than done at times".

"Yes, especially with boys. I feel as if I will be waiting forever for these boys to turn into men"

"You are young, sweetheart, and right now all you have is time. Besides, when the right person comes along, the time you waited will not matter one ounce. Now, why don't you finish getting ready and meet us all downstairs? Our guests will be arriving soon and I know they will be eager to see you after all your time away".

"I will be down in a moment, once I have changed into something perhaps a little more sensible"

Jane disguised a grin as she stood to depart.

"Very well".

. . . .

Right before the guests were due to arrive, all of the Rochester children had their own uncharacteristic meltdowns. To start, Peter, in spite of sleeping rather well the night before, cried and cried after being told he had to put away his toys before company came. As Jane was trying to soothe him, James and Henry came into the room both screaming that one had pushed the other down, though whose fault it was varied based on the person telling the story. Peter, Henry, and James all crying at the same time frustrated Emmy who came into the room with her hands over her ears, looking distraught.

"Peter darling, it is alright", she tried to soothe,

"Mother! mother!" James pulled on her skirt, "It was all Henry's fault. He knocked me down first. It was not I who started it"

"No!" contested Henry through sobs, "No mother, he is not telling the truth".

"Boys" Jane said firmly, "Boys, you both go sit on that couch over there until I can come speak with you. Emmy, dry your eyes. You need not be upset".

"But you are unhappy, mommy, and everyone is crying".

"I'm not unhappy, darling"

But still Peter cried in her arms, and still Henry and James were bickering on the sofa where they awaited their mother.

At that moment the door opened and Edward stepped inside looking taken aback.

"What is going on in here?" he asked, his thick brow furrowed angrily at the scene before him.

His two oldest sons looked up guiltily at him, and Emmy suddenly burst into hysterical sobs. Edward looked to Jane in bewilderment, looking for an explanation.

"The boys were fighting with one another, Peter didn't want to stop playing with his toys, and Emmy did not like all of the crying".

He sighed, reaching for his younger and more hysterical children and taking them in his arms so that Jane could turn on their two eldest, walking over to them and crouching down to their height so that she could look them in the face.

"Boys" she began, looking at them seriously but not speaking loudly or forcefully. She suddenly felt much calmer, and better equipped to address the issue at hand. "You are too old to be acting in this way, and I do not care whose fault it was that the argument happened. You are brothers. You owe one another kindness and understanding, and I expect to see such in our home"

"Yes, but mother-"

"No buts" Edward said as he approached with a tearful but much more settled Emmy and a now quiet Peter, "Your mother is quite right. There is to be no fighting between brothers and sisters in this house. Are we understood?"

"Yes" they both muttered together,

"Thank you" Jane affirmed, "For if you boys cannot play nicely together you will not be allowed to play at all".

"But mother, it is not always that we fight. Only sometimes"

She could not help the very small smile which crept over her face.

"I know it is only sometimes, and it is true that sometimes brothers do disagree, but all the same we shall have no physical fighting in this house"

They nodded,

"Now, go and clean yourselves up for our guests, please. They will be arriving any moment".

As Jane stood again, Peter reached for his mother and she took him into her arms. Emmy, who was holding the hand of her father, stepped forward to be with her mom, burying her face in her dress.

Edward took a step towards her, putting his hand in the small of her back.

"They simply all started at once" she explained, putting her palm to her forehead, "And what a time to start".

"You handled it brilliantly. I felt rather proud before I stepped in, and then I felt rather annoyed".

She smiled up at him, but at that moment carriage wheels could be heard crunching against the drive.

"That will be the Franklins" Edward ascertained, and Jane sighed in a way which caused him to turn his gaze back to her.

"Do you want a moment alone, sweetheart, before you come down to greet them?"

"Only a very brief one, just to smooth my hair" Jane said thankfully, "I have not had a moment to do so".

"Take all the time you need"

"Thank you" she said, rubbing his back between his shoulder blades a moment before departing.

She climbed the stairs quickly, eager to take as little time as possible before returning. She rushed past the rooms in the upstairs corridor, but an unusual and unexpected sound caused her to stop in front of a room which should have had no noise coming from it, for Adele was downstairs. There was a banging sound, and then muffled laughter. Leaning closer, she heard the sound of two hushed voices, though one was distinctly male and one distinctly female. Furrowing her brow, Jane pushed open the door to find Anna, one of the kitchen maids, and James, one of the footmans, pushed up against the wall and locked in an intimate embrace. At first, they were so immersed in their activity they did not notice her, but when Jane closed the door quickly behind her, they both jumped a foot in the air, fear flooding both their expressions. James at once bent to retrieve his trousers and Anna closed the front of her dress with fumbling fingers, blushing a violent red. Shocked, but more concerned with remaining composed, Jane took a deep breath and pulled herself up straight.

"James, Anna, please compose yourself and return downstairs in order to-"

"Oh, but Ms Rochester!" Anne said, her face turning frantically desperate, "Ms Rochester, please! Please allow us to explain"

"I'm sorry, Anna, but I do not see that there is anything to explain. Please return downstairs and pack your things in preparation for departure this afternoon".

"You are sending me away?" she asked, seeming genuinely confused.

"Anna and James, you are both aware of the rules of this house which we do not feel are unfair ones. Mr Rochester and I grant freedoms that others would not afford their staff, but in return for such we expect certain conduct from those we employ".

"But Madam-" James said quickly, brushing past Anna, "This was my fault, Anna is not to blame".

Jane sighed, momentarily torn between what she wanted to do and what should be done.

"I'm sorry to you both" she said earnestly, "But all are held to the same standard here. There can be no exceptions. It would not be fair".

"But I need this job" Anna half begged, "This is nothing more than a mistake. It will never happen again".

"I'm sorry" Jane repeated, placing her hand on the knob of the door and turning it slowly before exiting the room.

She closed the door behind her, though she did not know why- for privacy, she supposed. No one deserved the embarrassment of being seen in such a state beyond the discovery itself. That, at least, could be spared.

Descending the staircase, her stomach heavy with the weight of dread and regret, she could suddenly hear voices that were familiar and beloved but suddenly less welcome than they would have been five minutes before. She walked down onto the last step and then turned the corner into the sitting room where Diana and the Captain stood with Edward who was holding Peter in his arms as they all talked casually. When Jane entered, the clack of her shoes easily heard on the hard floor, they all turned toward her. Diana and the Captain smiled in welcome, but Edward's face instantly fell at the expression she wore.

"Is everything alright, darling?" he asked wearily, laying Peter on the ground and watching him run away before looking back up to his wife. The Franklin's both looked at Edward, and then to Jane, confused at not having seen that something was wrong in her face.

"It is so good to see you, Diana, Captain, but I am afraid I need to speak to my husband alone for a moment. I do hope you will not think me rude for pulling him away so quickly".

"Of course not" the Captain said, "But is everything alright?"

"It will be, but there is something which must be dealt with presently. I will explain when we return".

The front door was opened again, evident through the thick beam of light which was momentarily cast over the floor of the entranceway before it was gone with the sound of the shutting door. Moments later, Anne and Mr Eshton stepped through the threshold with their two girls at their side.

"Excuse us" Edward said, guiding his wife out of the room, "Mr Eshton, Ms Eshton, ladies" he said, nodding to them as they crossed across the entryway on the way to the study, "We'll be out in a moment. There is something we must attend to. The Franklin's are already in the sitting room".

"Forgive us" Jane said, stepping towards the study as Edward opened the door for her,

"Is everything well Rochester?" Eshton called, looking concerned as well.

"Yes" Jane answered for him, better able to do so, "We will not be long".

Anne nodded,

"Very well. We shall have no trouble making ourselves at home in the meantime, so do not worry"

Jane smiled appreciatively at her friend before proceeding into the study.

When Edward had latched the door behind them so that they were quite alone, he rounded on his wife.

"What's happened?"

She sighed,

"When I was heading upstairs to clean myself up for our guests, I heard noises and voices coming from Adele's room. I pressed my ear to the door and when I was certain of what I was hearing I opened it to find Anna and James pressed up against the wall, locked in an intimate embrace".

"Christ" he said, bowing his head

"Edward, I was so shocked I didn't know what to do. Perhaps I should have waited, but I told them to return downstairs and to pack their things. Was I wrong to do so?".

He shook his head,

"No , Jane, you were quite right. We cannot have such conduct in this house, and especially not in our daughter's room. The arrogance of such is astounding. But you surprise me. I thought Anna rather more sensible than this".

"You would be surprised what a woman can be convinced to do when she finds herself interested in a man, no matter how sensible she seems. I just feel rather conflicted. It likely was just one mistake, but we must be fair, mustn't we?".

He reached forward and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Leave this to me, darling. I will sort it out. They'll both be gone within the hour but I will not make it a cruel or unfair departure. I shall give them both enough money so they will not be forced onto the streets, and I will arrange their travel to the nearest station so that they can return to their families for the time being".

"Will you give them a reference?"

He considered a moment, but then he shook his head.

"I cannot do such. References are reserved for staff who have completed their jobs well and left their position on favourable terms. And I know, Jane, that I cannot fault them this one incident without being called a hypocrite, or worse, for a fear my sins far outweigh theirs. But, there are rules which cannot be ignored. Rules which, in order to keep this house functioning, must be obeyed".

Jane nodded and reached for him, smoothing his forearm with her thumb.

"I know you will do what is best. Though, perhaps as it was I who dismissed them, I should be the one to oversee their departure?".

He smiled appreciatively but shook his head.

"Put it out of your mind, my treasure, and do not worry. I will go and speak with them now".

He ruffled her hair affectionately before backing out of the room and heading off towards the servants corridor with the same confidence and assurance which he always managed and which Jane could never have mustered.

. . .

When she reentered the sitting room a few minutes later, feeling somewhat more composed then she had been previously, she found a fairly large group of their friends and family were now gathered together and talking happily amongst one another. Though immersed in conversation, they all looked up at her expectantly the moment she had situated herself in an armchair at the top of the room.

"What is it, Jane? Are you well? Are the children well?" Mary asked at once, her brow creased.

"Yes, we are all very well, thank you" she assured them, looking around for any children who might have been in the room before she proceeded,

"It is only that just now, I found two of our servants in a rather compromising and intimate situation. Edward is gone to see to the matter now"

"Oh no" Anne said, "And it is a matter which cannot be resolved?"

"No, I am afraid not"

"Oh dammit" the Captain lamented, "What an inconvenience indeed. We had a similar incident several months ago. Poor girl was in love, she said. I hope it will not be a loss felt too severely in the house?"

"Well, we value all of our members of our staff so the loss will no doubt be felt, but it is best to do what is right"

"What were their positions?" Eshton asked curiously, biting down on a sandwich in his hand.

"A footman and kitchen maid".

Mary shook her head, surely in an effort to show her criticism of the act, but her husband turned to look at her.

"You don't disagree with the idea of fair discipline, Mary?"

It was a statement, and not a question.

"No, certainly not. How very awful, and how bold to do such in an employer's home".

"Well, I am sure Edward will not be pleased when he returns" Eshton said, leaning back in his own chair and crossing his legs in amusement, "It is rather nasty business, dismissing staff".

At that moment, Adele rounded the corner in order to say hello to those gathered there, breaking up the conversation at hand.

"How are you Adele?" Diana asked brightly, "You look lovely"

And she did, Jane thought, which much of the bows and frills removed from her person.

"Thank you" she beamed.

"I hear that you have special company arriving this afternoon"

A deep blush and a suddenly timid voice.

"Oh, you mean Mr Reynolds?"

"And where did you meet this young man Reynolds?" Anne asked curiously, leaning forward in her seat.

As Adele began an explanation of her summer holiday where she had met the Reynold brothers, and the men- knowing they had lost the attention of their wives- dissolved into their own conversations, Jane looked out the window thoughtfully and yet sightlessly as her mind drifted to thoughts of the soon to be dismissed Anna.

She had started her position in the house some three or four years ago, some time after Jane had given birth to Emmy. It had been an unusually warm spring, and Jane had been out in the garden picking the earliest of the years' spring flowers for a vase in her daughter's room. She had been sitting in the grass a long time, caught up in her own world with Emmy in a basket beside her when she heard rather loud, unfiltered and unembarrassed singing. It made her smile at once, and she straightened up in order to see who exactly it was. Looking around one of the bushes at her eye level, Jane could see Anna walking along, almost skipping, half humming-half singing some tune that she could not exactly place. She was entirely caught up in her own world, and though she was meant to be in the kitchens in that late afternoon hour helping to prepare supper, Jane did not stop her, nor alert her to her presence. There was something rather personal about the moment which begged not to be interrupted. From that point on, Jane had always seen Anna as being more free-spirited than some of the other girls- happier, and more carefree. Perhaps, however, this carefree nature, this inability to be touched by the things which would make others self conscious, was ultimately a form of arrogance. Though it had been a lovely and private human moment to witness all those years ago, Anna was meant to be in the kitchens helping to prepare the food for supper. Her being absent from such meant that others would have been forced to work harder than they should have. And in this, the selfishness of the day's events were not impossible to have imagined.

Noise in the entranceway pulled Jane from her thoughts and she looked up in time to see James stride past the doorway shortly followed by Edward. She rose slowly, not noticing the eyes on her as she departed the room and stepped into the hallway where she had a full view of the two men talking in the drive through the opened front door. In fact, she was so focused on them that she almost did not see Anna hovering in the threshold, her old carpet bag resting against her ankle.

Jane approached her slowly, leaning against the opposite side of the door frame, still watching the scene before them. Eventually she turned and glanced at Anna who was watching her, words hovering on the edge of her lips.

"Mr Rochester has just explained to us that we will not be receiving a reference"

"Yes, he has told me the same"

"And do you think such is fair?"

"I do. Though I am not as well versed in such matters myself, I trust my husband to do what is right"

"Well, I don't think it is right" she protested, "I have done a good job here. I have done all anyone has asked me to do"

"Yes, you have done a good job" Jane assured her soberly, "But a reference letter is written when a person has completed their job well and has left the house on good terms. These are not the conditions under which you are being asked to leave".

She nodded, chewing her bottom lip anxiously. Suddenly it occurred to Jane for the first time that they were likely the very same age.

"You think me a horrible person for what I've done"

It wasn't a question, it was an assumption, and the embarrassment and the shame disguised in her voice was hard to hear.

"No", Jane assured her, "I do not".

"Then why send me away?" she asked desperately, her brow creasing and her voice breaking. She looked at Jane for the answer but looked away again quickly, wiping her eyes on the back of her sleeve.

There was silence for a moment while Jane considered, and then she reached for Anna, touching her shoulder.

"May I give you one piece of advice, as a friend?"

A nod.

"In life, we all must take responsibility for the things we do, right and wrong. It is second nature to us as human beings to want to blame others for our mistakes, and never to face the consequences of our actions, but when we are able to do so, Anna, there is every opportunity for growth. We can be a better version of ourselves than we have previously known. That is what hope is. If we can learn from our mistakes, then nothing in this life is wasted".

"Perhaps. But what a fool I've made of myself. News has already traveled to the servant hall here. Everyone thinks me a louse, and soon everyone within fifty miles will think so too".

"What matters is how we view ourselves and how God views us, not how others see us. In a new place you will have all the freedom in the world to start over. No one will know a thing".

Anna nodded, wiping her eyes again on the back of her coat. Ahead of them, James climbed into an awaiting coach and Edward closed the door, waving to him once as it pulled away. At this, Anna broke into audible tears.

"I love him, and I will never see him again"

Jane felt pity pulling at her heart, and looking back out at the drive at the disappearing carriage before them, she wondered what the extent of that love truly could have been. For Anna, it was perhaps love, or some strangled form of it which she did not fully understand. As for James, he had walked past her in the entranceway as if they were mutual strangers.

"That too will pass," Jane said softly, "Even if it does not feel like it at present".

Anna straightened up quickly as Edward walked back inside the house. When he saw both women standing in the door, he gestured for Anna to come forward as the other carriage was pulled round in front of the stairs.

"Anna, I have arranged for our coach to take you into the train station. From there you may charge my account with a ticket for wherever you need to go. They are already aware I have sanctioned this course of action".

"Thank you, Mr Rochester" she said, "That is very kind of you".

He bowed his head,

"I assume you will go to your family? They reside in Liverpool, do they not?"

"Indeed they do. I will stay with my sister for a little while, until I can find new employment"

He nodded.

"And is it just your one bag?"

"Yes sir"

"Then I will help you stow it".

He took it from the ground, conscious of the broken handle, and walked with it to the carriage where he secured it to the top. Anna turned back to Jane, her mind looking as if he were running with a million thoughts which all hovered on her lips. At last, she settled on only a few.

"Thank you, Ms Rochester, for your great kindness to me in this home. I will remember it all of my life, as I will remember you".

Before anything else could be said, Anna tore from the entranceway, down the steps, and into the carriage where the doors were closed and the driver was waved off. A word to Edward, an adjustment in her seat, and then Anna was gone too.

. . .

Returning again to the sitting room several minutes later, Jane and Edward could hear the children playing inside before they saw them. In rounding the corner, they found them all playing on the floor, surrounded by the adults still happily talking amongst themselves.

"Hello there" Adam Clarke called out, raising his hand in hello. His wife Emma turned at once to acknowledge their friends and hosts, also smiling.

"Oh, it is good to see you two" Edward replied, sitting down beside his wife when she was seated "How do you do? I thought you could not make it until later today"

"Oh, we're well enough. The roads were clear and pleasant and my business of this morning did not take half the time I expected it to. You can never tell with lawyers how much of your time they will demand".

Edward chuckled,

"What exactly did he say?"

"Nothing I couldn't have anticipated for myself. If only my father had been more clear in his will, then the issue of my sister's dowry would not be such a challenging one. And if only my prying relatives would let it be, I could give my sister whatever estate land she wanted and be done with it. Blasted business of wills is a wretched one".

"Thankfully my father died without one. If he did make up his mind to write one, I'm not sure he could have found it in him to give me one penny of his wealth"

Jane smiled to herself and Clarke laughed, but she did not hear how their conversation progressed for a moment later she heard herself addressed in a small voice.

"Mother!" Emmy said, running towards Jane, "Mother, look".

She had a small flower pressed into her hand which she unfurled so that Jane could see it. The petals were white, the center a warm buttery yellow.

"And look" Matilda said, also approaching Jane with the same flower in her hand, stumbling slightly on the edge of the carpet.

"Girls, these are beautiful. Perhaps you should go and pick a bunch outside in the gardens. It is sure to be the last of them for the year".

Margret walked over behind her older sister, whining that she did not have a flower like the others.

"And then" Jane continued, "Margret can have a flower too"

"Oh dearest" Anne said, her daughter's name alerting them to their conversation, "It is only a flower. Do not fuss. Go outside now with your sister and Emmy and collect one and stop your crying".

"Ruth?" Emmy said, turning back, "Are you coming?"

Ruth looked up at Mary who nodded,

"Go on"

She stood and left the room with Emmy at her side, but the boys all remained in the corner of the room, playing some game Jane did not recognise. In truth, as the case normally was amongst young children, the boys got along with each other a little better than the girls. Henry, James, Daniel, and Arthur all played equally and enthusiastically. The girls, however, had personalities which varied more, and they had to work a little harder to get along with one another. There were also bigger age gaps between the girls, and maturity was at a higher variance. Still, watching them giggle, and grin, and exchange flowers, Jane could not help suspecting they would all be the best of friends in their future lives and this brought her much comfort.

At that moment, Jane could hear more rushed footsteps outside in the hallway. She thought she saw a flash of white as Adele ran past the archway but she couldn't be sure. Edward, who had evidently noticed as well, was already standing and approaching the front door.

"Excuse us again" Jane said, "I believe Adele's special visitor has arrived".

Anne and Diana turned to each other, their faces full of glee.

Outside in the entranceway, Adele stopped running the moment she saw that the carriage which had come to a hault in the drive was not a personal one, but rather one embossed with the crest of the post. At once, all anticipation fell from her aspect, all excitement drained from her person. Seeing this hesitation, Edward stepped forward and placed his hand on her shoulder as the man disembarked from his horse and drew a sealed note from within his pocket.

"I am to deliver this note to Miss Adele Rochester".

Edward accepted the note from the man who bowed obediently before mounting his horse and setting off. When he turned to hand the note to his worried-looking daughter, however, Adele already had tears in her eyes.

"No" she said quickly, "You read it"

Edward glanced at Jane now standing at Adele's side, unsure of what to do, but she only nodded in encouragement. He broke the wax seal in two and unfolded the letter, his eyes scanning quickly over the words before summarizing its contents out loud.

"Mr Reynolds is already in London" he explained, "He sends his apologies for the change in plans but he and his uncle were forced to return early and he did not have the chance to write you ahead of time to explain such".

The tears sparking in Adele's eyes ran down her face but she whipped them away quickly, intent on stiffening her expression at once.

"Well, it was very impolite of him to do such" she said, her voice straining under the effort to remain even, "Excuse me"

"Adele" Edward called, trying to stop her as she ran, but Jane caught his arm.

"Allow her some time alone" she encouraged gently, "The first time a person's heart breaks it can feel like the end of the world and I think she would prefer a cry on her own for a little while. I will go up in a little while and check on her".

He looked torn for a moment but ultimately did not fight her, for he knew she was right. Instead, he handed Jane the note which, in reading it through, she suspected to have been written quickly and thoughtlessly. She glanced towards the stairs where Adele had disappeared, then back at Edward.

"I wish she could know that it is not worth having your heartbroken over a man, especially when that man is nothing more than an immature boy".

"You broke my heart once, Mr Rochester. I do hope you haven't forgotten"

His face turned serious at once, not finding any amusement in her joke.

"I will not forget such until my dying day, and even then I suspect it will haunt me".

She chuckled,

"Well, some people are worth the heartbreak, just perhaps not this Mr Reynolds".

He took a deep breath, cupping her face affectionately and running this thumb over her cheek.

"There are times where I'm not sure I was worth it either, darling"

"Is that what you really think?" she asked slowly, "Is that what we have spent these last seven years doing?"

He looked around for any potential witnesses before drawing her slowly to his mouth. She kissed him back, but the moment the smile vanished from his lips and his mouth turned serious, she deepened it- became almost desperate to deepen it, but then she was suddenly conscious of someone stepping into the hall, so instead she broke the kiss and pressed her forehead to him.

"Can we continue this tonight? Or later this afternoon?- whatever comes first?"

Edward grinned, and Jane could not help but mirror his smile.

"You have my word".

He kissed her forehead, sighing as he pulled back.

"What a day we've had"

And Jane smiled at him in a way which she knew he understood, though no further words passed between them. Tiredness, and happiness, and feeling slightly overwhelmed was not new to the Rochester's, not with all of their children being as young as they were, but there were still moments where it felt almost new. It wasn't hard for Jane to recall the time in their marriage where it was just she and her husband, when they spent their time speculating about their future family which had now come. It wasn't hard for Edward, either, to remember the nights he had held his pregnant wife in his arms, praying a sincere prayer that he would be able to be the kind of father to his children that he had never known himself. And yet, neither person grieved for that quieter, more personal time. Creating life and bringing that life into the world had brought Jane and Edward closer as a married couple then they ever could have imagined, solidifying the bond between them not only as mother and father, but also husband and wife. It was this connection, this fundamental connection between them, which made managing difficult days possible, for Jane knew she was fulfilling her life's purpose, as did Edward.

"Come on darling" he said slowly, "We'd best return".

. . .

"So, where is the chap?" Eston asked the moment the Rochester's reentered the room, "We'd all like to meet him"

"Unfortunately, Mr Reynolds will not be joining us today after all".

"Oh no" Emma said, bringing her hand to her mouth, "And I suspect that we will not be seeing Adele for the rest of the day either?"

"Perhaps not"

Eshton chuckled to himself, though it was not an unkind laugh.

"Oh well. Adele will learn sooner or later that most young men are rather bad news, and that it is best to stay clear of them until they become responsible gentlemen"

Edward, the Captain, Father Roberts, and Adam Clarke all grunted their agreement.

"Well, that is precisely why I am thankful that while we are staying in town over the next few weeks, all of our girls will be far too young to catch the eye of any young man- a rather good thing in London, I suspect" Anne said, and at this, Father Roberts straightened up.

"Ms Eshton, you raise an important point. I rather think it is time we discussed this business we are gathered for, as delightful as an afternoon of simply talking would be. This business with Mr Hughes and his wife, Rochester, is not one to be taken lightly. If things don't work out, I do hope you know what the consequences for yourself will be".

"And for you" Edward reminded him soberly, "Though I see no other way for this business to be handled. An injustice has been committed which must be spoken for. Glynn has had his way in this county for too long, and has been entirely unchallenged. Eshton, though you are our magistrate, but he rivals your authority on the best day with all of his personal connections"

"And on the worst day he has more authority" Eshton confirmed, "Rochester is right. Glynn needs to be put in his place".

"Of what business do you speak?" Diana asked in confusion, turning towards her husband.

He sighed, and Jane was surprised that Diana had no sense of why they were gathered after what had been weeks of discussion.

"Do not trouble yourself thinking about it, Di. It is rather nasty business".

"I want to know what it is," she said quickly, "Is it dangerous?"

"Not physically" Eshton answered rather cryptically, but at this Diana only looked more alarmed.

There was an awkward silence, and because the Captain did not respond, Edward explained.

"There was an incident several weeks ago, Ms Franklin, involving a man named Mr Hughes who formerly worked on Mr Glynn's estate. Most unfortunately, Mr Hughes' wife has become involved in the incident through no fault of her own and when Mr Glynn was confronted on his behavior by Mr Hughes, the whole family were thrown out onto the streets- including two young daughters. Mr Hughes eventually came here looking for work and relayed to me the story of his unfortunate circumstances. When I told Mr Eshton of the unfortunate state of affairs, he informed me he had known Hughes from the time he worked on his father's estate and that what the man was accused of- the pretense for having been dismissed, was an impossibility".

"I also know Mr Gynn all too well" Eshton added, looking flatly at Diana, "Horrible man. I was happy to learn that there was an opportunity to put him out of his position of power. Edward suggested we take action and I was all too eager to help"

"What kind of action?"

"Legal action, in town"

Diana turned on her husband,

"And you've agreed to this?"

"Of course. One man could not tackle this alone and I can be of help".

She crossed her arms, looking at each of the women in turn before turning back to her husband.

"I understand that this is a noble occupation, and I commend you all for such, but this seems a somewhat foolish task to take on. I worry for you all. Taking this into London could be detrimental for all of our reputations"

"We will discuss it later" the Captain said, but she was not satisfied and so she continued.

"Father Roberts, you are a man of the clergy. Surely it will not look well for you to become involved in political matters?".

"A clergyman always tries to do what is right, what God would sanction as the right course of action"

"Jane?" she implored, looking to her cousin, "Surely you can see how there are better ways for this issue to be addressed? You are always so full of good sense".

"I do not believe that this situation is without sense, Diana" she explained gently, "I trust Edward in what he says he can do and I cannot stand in the way of what he feels is right"

"Well I rather disagree" she flared, now sitting up straighter, "I do not think-"

"Diana" her husband cut in firmly, "That is enough. You have taken up enough of our friend's time speaking your opinions aloud, opinions which have no bearing on our plans".

It was a surprise to hear such a sharp and definitive tone come out of the Captain's mouth. Ever since his sudden departure from Diana several years before, Jane was sure that he had always been very careful to prove that he was sorry for what he had done and that he and Diana were indeed still harmonious in their thoughts and feelings. This was the first time there had been the faintest hint of discourse between them, and it was noticeable in the air.

"Well, Diana, I for one share your concern" Emma cut in helpfully, "But men will be men. We cannot stop ours, so we must be a support to one another whilst we are in town. We might even spend some time shopping, or attending a play or concert. I think such would be a lovely thing to do".

. . .

"Well I am not sure what exactly the Clarke's plan is" Edward said from bed that night, long after their visitors had left and the children had been put to bed, "And I am not sure when the others made a similar plan, but you and the children will not be coming into town with me"

Jane approached his side of the mattress as she tied her hair off for sleep, one eyebrow raised.

"Might I remind you that you do not make the decisions for this family. We make them together. Besides, I do not understand your logic. Perhaps if I did, I would be able to consider your point of view"

"My logic is a simple one" he said plainly, "If I am to be consumed with business the entire day, which I anticipate I will be, and I am away from the house, I cannot be there to protect you and the children should some incident occur".

"I hardly think we shall need your protection all hours of the day and night. It is London, not a warzone".

"Jane" he said seriously, "You do not know the types of men who exist in London- men who stalk the streets day and night in order to prey on women and children. You do not know the city and they will see that right away. You will be an immediate target to them".

"Yes, but I think you forget that we have spent some time in London together, and so I am not completely unacquainted with its ways. Nor am I foolish. Besides, I would not be alone. I would be with Diana, Mary, Emma, and Anne and all of the children''.

"Right" he said dully, "Because they would certainly ensure your safety".

Jane looked at him for a long moment, long enough for the sarcasm to fall from his aspect. Instead he sighed,

"I know you are not foolish" he said sincerely, and Jane dropped her hands from her hair, "I know you would never let anything happen to our children. But there are dangers outside of your control, and I could not live with myself if anything happened to any one of you. I will be able to complete the work with a much easier mind if I know you all are safe, and that means I will be able to return to you sooner".

Jane sat down on the bed before him so that she could look into his face, determined to tell him exactly how she felt.

"We cannot be apart. Not for as long as you ask"

"If you think for one moment that I wish to be away from you-"

"No, Edward. I know. Please let me finish. I know that you do not wish to be separated. I know you would lament the arrangement perhaps even more than I, which is why I also know the sacrifice you would be willing to make to keep us safe means we are the luckiest family in the world. But the distance will be something quite different for you than it will for me. You will be without your family, yes, but you will be occupied. I will be caring for five children on my own, running a household, and seeing to the matters of servants and callers without any help. I could do so, happily, for a few days, or even a week if the situation required such, but if this is to be several weeks, or longer, then it is a rather different story".

Edward looked at Jane with an expression full of thoughtful energy before reaching forward and taking her hand in his, smoothing her knuckles with his thumb and kissing each one.

"Forgive me" he said earnestly, "I did not mean to imply that I did not consider the toll that this would take on you when I initially committed to helping Mr Hughes. Such could not be further from the truth. I hated asking such of you".

"I know," Jane assured him, "And I have not forgotten that you asked my thoughts on the matter before you promised Mr Hughes anything. But at that time it was a question of a few days, not a few weeks. Seeing as plans have changed, I believe we must reconsider our agreement too"

He looked at her for a long moment, his eyes searching and serious. At last he nodded in agreement.

"Firstly, I would never ask you to look after the household on top of caring for the children. Nor would I expect you to take on any additional duties associated with visitors or management of staff"

"Yes, but if an emergency were to come up, something would have to be done".

"Yes, I would hire someone to see to the estate while I was gone so you would not need to think of it".

She nodded slowly, but it was with much hesitation.

"You hate the idea of such- of leaving the management of the house to someone else. You would not be at ease with that arrangement".

"I would, given the alternative".

"You think you would" Jane corrected wisely, "But we both know how uneasy you would be".

"Perhaps" he agreed, "But I would take feeling somewhat uneasy over worrying about you constantly".

"Very well" Jane said after some consideration, "But then how can you know how long this will take? You can only guess, and even a moderate guess would require at least a month away from home. If it is to be more, as is likely the case, what would we do?"

His face strained- torn between the two conflicting desires of keeping his family safe and keeping them together.

Edward, I am asking you to change your mind".

"Jane- don't" he said wearily, his expression tortured at the thought of making his wife unhappy. He closed his eyes, shaking his head in frustration.

"You know all I've ever wanted to do is make you happy. You know all I want is to give you whatever you want, even though you ask me for nothing. And yet this is the one thing you are asking for, and with that face of yours that I cannot refuse. It is incredibly unfair of you".

Jane could not help the small smile which moved over her face.

"And I cannot convince you to stay here? I cannot convince you by any reasonable means?

She shook her head,

"So you will not hear sense?"

"I am always willing to hear sense when it is present, but being apart over these upcoming weeks has no sense in it".

He smiled his crooked, half smile that she so loved before turning away and then back to her.

"Can I make you a proposition, then? A sort of compromise?"

"Mmhm"

"Allow me to travel into London ahead of you and the children so that I might find suitable arrangements before you arrive. It should not take long. Perhaps two or three days at most. That way, I will know you are all safe and cared for here while arrangements are made for your safety in town. It is the best I can do"

"Then I am satisfied" Jane agreed easily, never once having to question her husband's promises once they had been made.

"And as for leaving you to care for our children on your own, whether here or in town, I promise that I will not have you feeling that way. It is true that I may not be available much during the daytimes, but I promise that I will be home with you and the children as much as possible, and every night in time for dinner".

"Very well, Mr Rochester"

"Does such suit you?"

"I believe it does"

She sighed, holding his chin in place between her finger and thumb.

"Thank you".

He shook his head,

"Do not thank me for such. It makes me sound like such a brute"

"You are many things, Mr Rochester, but a brute is not one of them".

"Oh, is that so?" he asked, lifting her bum slightly so that he could bring her onto his lap and tip her face down towards his. Grinning, she pressed her forehead to his.

"There. Now we have had our weekly fight. We do not need to have another one until this time next week".

Edward chuckled.

"If such was a fight, I am going to need you to be much angrier with me the next time".

"Why is that?"

"Because" he continued, his mouth pulled up in a cheeky half smile, "We cannot have apology sex if you are not angrier during the fight, and if you do not say horrible things to me that I must find the strength to forgive".

"Continue on in that vein and I promise you I will have some choice things to say, though I cannot say they will be forgotten with sex".

"I think you rather underestimate its power. Perhaps you need reminding?"

Squinting her disapproval for a moment, and trying to appear stern, Jane climbed off her husband and lay back down on the bed beside him, though, as she expected, he was not long in moving over her and pressing his lips to her jaw.

"Is there any chance you are feeling cross with me right now?"

She could not help but laugh at the hopefulness in his voice before she turned onto her back, yet the moment her eyes found her husband, her face fell. She reached up to cradle his face- unable to hide the disappointment she felt.

"Are you really going to leave tomorrow?" she asked in a quiet voice.

"Not if you continue like this" he assured her, "Not if I can't get you out of my head"

"Well..." Jane said, pushing him down into the mattress with her finger and throwing her leg over him, "I would like to try my very best to remain in your thoughts as much as possible, then. Especially when you are alone in that cold carriage tomorrow morning on your way to London...".

He laughed darkly to himself as she stretched out over him, hovering close to his mouth but not allowing her lips what they craved. Instead, she pushed his hands above his head and pressed her body against his.

"Shall I tell you what I want?"

"Mmm"

He flipped his wife over in an instant, pressing her back into the cool sheets beneath them in such a rush that she couldn't help the quiet exclamation which escaped her lips. He untied the front of her nightshirt and pulled it down around her waist so that he could press his lips to her collarbone. She smiled under the feel of his mouth, breathing in steadying air as he kissed her jaw.

"What I want" he began, grinning against her skin "-is for you to show me what you are going to do while I am gone, during those cold nights when you are alone and thinking of me and wanting me in a way you would never tell another soul"

He took her hand and guided it down her front until her fingers were resting against her center.

"Mmm" she breathed, trying hard to not fall into his distraction. "Well you see, the problem is that I am not sure I will be able to do any such thing with you gone. I think I may be too tired from caring for all of our children. It seems more likely I will collapse into bed and fall asleep without a single thought of you"

He suggestivally flicked her finger against herself but then drew back, looking up expectantly at her.

"Show me" he demanded in a low whisper, and Jane found she could not, or rather did not want to resist him any longer. In beginning slow and teasing strokes, she pushed her chin up, drawing in a relieved breath at the feeling of her own wetness. Though Edward continually changed his gaze between observing Jane's face and her hand, seeming rather eager to watch both at the same time, she could not allow herself to look away from him. His eyes had the power to convey so much, for his gazes contained entire languages that only they spoke in this private, intimate space, and the moment their eyes did meet, all that existed between them was brought into being in a seemingly tangible way.

"You're so beautiful" he whispered, her heavy eyelids struggling to open as her brow creased with the rush of his words, "You are everything to me"

He kissed her forehead,

"Everything".

The moan which escaped her mouth was agonized, but it was also soft. Her husband brushed his thumb over her lip, dragging it down in the middle as he leaned in to kiss her. But before his tongue could part her mouth she gasped, her breath too uneven to sustain the intensity his mouth imparted on her.

Slicker. Wetter than before.

"Mmmm, yes darling".

He bent forward to kiss her again, and this time she slowed her hand so that she could focus on his mouth without needing to draw back for a desperate rush of air. But this plan was foolish, and a moment later she was just as winded and just as overwhelmed as she had been before.

"God" she gasped desperately, frustrated in what felt like an immature way, but her husband only smiled. Spurred on by his knowing and proud look, Jane locked eyes with Edward, her brow creased.

"I need to finish. I need you inside of me, please"

"No, darling" he said but there was reluctance in his voice, "Not this time. I want to watch you as you finish"

"I thought you just said you wanted to give me everything I wanted?"

"You know I do"

"But I want you".

"Finish for me first, and then I will make you finish again in whatever position you like, as many times as you want"

Feeling suddenly both subdued and yet completely unsatisfied, Jane focused once again on the rhythm of her hand circling her wet and slick core which throbbed under her touch. She lay her head back and closed her eyes, wanting to both prolong the sensation threatening to tear through her and also needing to feel relief spread all over her body. But then Edward bent his lips to her ear and uttered such words to her that she no longer had a choice in the matter. A low moan turned to a cry in a short rush of pleasure which arched her back and curled her toes. And then the lips at her throat were on her mouth, and she kissed her husband with so much desire that her head spun dizzily.

As she righted herself, she opened her heavy eyes so that she could watch her chest rising and falling- watch as her husband lowered his lips to between her breasts as she wrapped her arms around his head. He sucked her, pulling her skin between his lips and scraping her gently with his teeth.

"There" he said, kissing the forming bruise with his now soft lips, "A mark by which to remember me".

"Mmm" Jane smiled, pulling his face up to hers so that she might push his curls back from his forehead. She had so many thoughts in her head, so many things which fought to be heard in her mind that she suddenly felt overwhelmed with feelings for her husband who she loved with every ounce of her being.

"How in the world did I ever manage to find you?"

He chuckled once, kissing her jaw.

"I think you're forgetting that it was I who found you on that lonely road, Ms Rochester"

"I found you" she contested, "You nearly trampled me"

"Witch" he uttered lowly, Jane kissing his cheek in amusement at his reproach.

She could feel his hardened member pressing against her stomach, and in reaching for it, she heard him groan.

"How do you want to finish?" she asked lowly, twisting his hair around her finger, "Do you want to finish in my hand...in my mouth...or in me?"

He growled into the crux of her neck, and Jane smiled to herself as she wrapped her arms around his head.

"Do you have a preference?" he spoke into her skin.

"Not at all" she whispered against his hair.

"Surprise me, then".

A thoughtful pause.

"Sit for me on the end of the bed".

By the time Edward had his two feet on the floor, Jane was already kneeling before him, moving her hair out of the way and pushing it down her back. She rubbed her hands over both of his legs before lowering her mouth onto him.

Ecstasy.

From his position above her, Edward could see the fine line of her back, the curve of her bum, the slope of her shoulders in the mirror before them, and the sight alone was enough to make him growl out his desire for her. She was perfection. Every morsel of her was perfection. He couldn't fathom how one man could have everything in the world he ever wanted, but more than he ever thought to ask for, in one person.

"Mmm, yes" he encouraged her, grabbing her hair and bunching it at the back of her head as he gently guided the speed of her movements. Jane reached around her husband and dragged her nails along his back, her nails scratching him to the rhythm of him moving in and out of her. He groaned, throwing his head back at the sensation.

"Dammit Jane" he lamented,

She grinned to herself

"Come here"

"Why?" she asked innocently, looking up at him from under her lashes, "Is this too much for you?"

He laughed in amazement, helping her up so that she could straddle him, one foot on the floor, the other knee on the mattress beside him.

"Get on your knees"

It was more a demand than a suggestion, but Jane did not mind. She climbed onto her knees and looked up to face him, but a second later he had her turned around, pushing her gently onto her forearms.

"Watch" he said, indicating the mirror placed strategically in front of the bed, and when he could see their eyes meeting in the reflection he pushed into her once, her eyes instantly rolling back and her hair falling in front of her breasts. Edward moved the curls out of the way, holding them in his fist against her back which flexed in effort as he pushed into her again.

"Oh" she moaned, closing her eyes as he once again filled her, deeper each time.

"Watch" he commanded

Jane obeyed, or at least tried to, looking at her own expression before her eyes slid onto her husband behind her, and with the next push into her she collapsed onto the mattress, her backside raised but her chest flat against the bed. She felt her husband's hands close around her waist, nearly reaching fully around her as he shuttered and groaned at his approaching climax.

And suddenly she felt his hand make contact with her backside, and as he slapped her behind she opened her mouth, but no sound came out. She smiled instantly, and if she was looking at her husband's reflection she would have seen him smile in response. He smacked her again, this time slightly harder. She moaned lightly, and then loudly as her husband's mouth made contact with the skin burning a bright red under the mark of his hand. The contrast of the firmness of his hand and the softness of his lips made Jane burn with desire.

Now feeling determined to have her husband finish, she wiggled against him suggestively and instantly achieved the desired effect. He grabbed her backside, forcing himself into her once again, this time quickly and desperately until he was crying out in passion and emptying himself into his wife. The moment he exited her, she turned onto her back so that she could look up at him, desperate to look into his face not shown in a reflective glass. He smiled down at her, dropping to lay his lips against her forehead, chin, cheeks, and then closed eyes.

"Woman, you are going to kill me one day" he said, this time lingering as he planted a kiss on her forehead.

"I certainly hope not. Who else is going to put me in my place?" she teased, and when he raised his eyebrow curiously she turned onto her side and looked over her shoulder, "Could you check to see if I am bruised?"

He chuckled, turning her onto her stomach and assessing her backside. She was red, and probably would have a bruise the following day, though she had never minded such before.

"Hm" he said, his assessing tone exaggerated, "You are a little red"

"Oh" she said, her brow creasing, "I see".

He turned her again onto her back so she was looking into his eyes, and at once all teasing was gone from his aspect.

"Did I hurt you, darling?"

"No" she said reassuringly, taking his arm, "You did not hurt me"

"Okay" he said gently, bending his face to kiss every inch of her skin with feather light kisses. She closed her eyes, her forehead creasing. The gentleness of his mouth made her skin burn.

"Can you finish again for me, darling?"

She nodded,

"Yes, very easily".

"Do you want me to use my mouth or my fingers?"

"Do you have a preference?" Jane asked, repeating her husband's words.

He smiled, repeating her's.

"Not at all"

"Then surprise me"

The moment he threw her legs over his shoulder and lowered his mouth onto her, Jane squirmed restlessly. But then she felt his finger inside of her and she positively writhed under the sensation.

"Oh" she moaned, her forehead scrunching in concentration as she felt her leg shake instantly. He knew the exact spot, and he was well practiced in finding it.

The anticipation built quickly, and strong, and even in trying to prolong the intoxicating sensation, Jane did not think she lasted more than thirty seconds. As she finished, only distantly aware of her cries ringing through the air, she felt her heart thumping against her ribcage and her breath pulling deep, desperate air from her lungs. She dropped her head back as her legs were gently lowered back onto the mattress. In an instant Edward was back up to her height.

Jane watched him as his soft and warm lips closed on her forehead, shutting her eyes as he lingered there and opening them sleepily as he drew back. The minute she could see his dark, feeling eyes, understanding all of the unspoken feelings between them, she felt a wave of emotion threating to overtake her.

"I love you" she whispered, so low it was almost unintelligible.

He took her chin between his finger and thumb and kissed her slowly and lovingly, but there was desperation there- perhaps the desperation of trying to make her understand how he felt. And then Jane had the sense that he was pulling himself back, that he was resisting, and for what reason she did not know. But then he looked at her with his own unique penetrating gaze, and she waited for his words which were so sincere and true when he did speak that no person could ever doubt how much he meant them.

"You, Jane Eyre, encompass every good feeling, every good ideal, every good deed, every good thing I have ever known, and I love you for it".

She pulled him down beside her so that she could wrap her arms around his neck and drape her leg over his waist. She buried her face in his chest, breathing evenly as she felt the familiar feeling of safety flood and calm her system. Edward pulled the blankets up around her shoulders, rubbing her gently to make sure she was warm enough as she settled for what he assumed would be sleep. She smiled faintly at the action but she did not feel as tired as he likely suspected.

"Do you know what often comes over my mind on days such as today?"

"What is that?"

"That all of our friends and family often speculate on the nature of our intimate life"

Jane pulled her face up to look at him curiously.

"What makes you say that?"

"Have you ever noticed that in life, when one chooses to be more private than others about their personal life, it creates much more curiosity around it?"

Jane smiled,

"Mmm, of course".

"Well, I know the woman ask you of our marriage rather openly, though I also know you have never said much in detail on the subject. The gentlemen know better than to ask me, but they do wonder about it"

"How can you be sure?"

"Oh, a man can tell" he said somewhat cryptically, and though Jane did not know exactly what he meant, she was too curious of what he was going to say next to interrupt him.

"But there is something about seeing you seated before our friends, smiling and fulfilling the role of a kind and considerate hostess which drives me mad, for I know what you look and sound like in our bed, and the contrast is almost too great for me to bare- especially knowing they wonder about it too".

Jane sat up, now looking skeptically at him,

"And it isn't I who intrigues them" he continued, now surely trying to make his wife blush "I bet they are burning with curiosity about you, for they have some idea of what I am like, given my past. That I have wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you is no mystery to anyone".

"Edward" she scolded, "How wicked of you to say as much".

"Tell me I am wrong and I will stop at once".

She stuttered and he grinned.

"I think" he continued, but then he stopped to consider. When he did proceed, his voice was slow and thoughtful.

"Well, I think that intimacy is somewhat of a strange concept, for while it is created and cultivated within a very private space, it is something which cannot be taken away from two people once they possess it. It is present in the looks they share, in the way they understand what unspoken thoughts pass between them, in the way their bodies naturally migrate towards each other, even when there is no consciousness to do so. In this, intimacy becomes a rather public thing for others to notice, even if they can only speculate on the cause for it. And on days like today, knowing that those gathered here understand the intimacy we share without knowing the details of it fills me with pride, even if I shouldn't be comparing our marriages''.

Many times over the years, in many places amongst many different groups of people, Jane had felt eased by Edward's presence at her side. He was naturally more social than she was, naturally more confident, and as a result had always drawn people to him in spite of having no innate desire for the attention. She looked to him in those moments for reassurance but she never had to wonder if it would come, for she knew that although he charmed the room with his stories, and conquests, and good humour, his focus was always with her- and on not only her social comfort, but her visibility. He wanted her seen, he wanted her heard. She knew that he was proud of her in the same way she was proud of him, for when he spoke to others, when they were captivated by him as they so often were, or when he was helping in some quiet and understated way, she was immensely proud to be his wife.

"I think you are right" she reflected, "I do not believe that the intimacy which exists between two people can be erased from their actions, even when trying to be as private as possible. And if such is the case, then I could not be prouder that you are the person that everyone knows I am so deeply in love with".

He smiled his warm, prideful, all-consuming smile which he used only sparingly as he pulled her forward to kiss her. She smiled against his mouth, wrapping her arms around his neck as he laid her back onto the mattress.

The air in the room was suddenly hot and heavy, though it was not suffocating and it was not uncomfortable. It was comforting, and given that she was laying in her husband's arms for the last time for at least several days, Jane decided to savour the feeling for as long as she could. After some time, however, inevitable waves of sleep threatened to consume her, and though it would have been easy to succumb to them, to drift off into unconsciousness, she pulled herself back rather reluctantly.

"Edward?"

"Yes my love?"

He sounded slightly surprised, as if he thought his wife was already asleep and was surprised to have heard her voice.

"What time is it?"

A moment's pause while he looked at the clock,

"It's nearly two"

"Mmm. Do try and sleep. You will have an early rise tomorrow and you mustn't ride while tired. It is not safe".

"Do not worry about me. I will be well enough".

"We shall see, come morning time".

She could feel his laughter as he kissed her hair, and she made herself comfortable by pulling his arm under her chin while the other wrapped around her waist. It felt incredibly secure and safe, and with these feelings surrounding her, Jane was asleep within moments.

. . .

The morning light had only just broken over the horizon when Edward rose and began dressing in order to depart. Jane did not stir right away, for she did not want him to feel guilty that he had woken her, and she also thought the additional sleep might be of benefit. But somewhere between the state of sleeping and waking, she heard the bedroom door closing and suddenly all was very silent. She was still a few minutes longer, trying to drift off back into sleep, but eventually she sat up and rubbed her eyes, confused as to why her husband did not return. Worried that something important was delaying him, she stood up and pulled on her robe, tying it sleepily at her front before venturing out into the hallway.

It was too early for the fires to be lit, so the floor and air retained their somewhat damp chill of the misty morning outside. Even with her robe, Jane felt slightly chilled, and rubbed her arms for warmth as she glanced up and down the hall. But in a moment her eyes fell upon the slightly ajar door of her son's room and she advanced towards it, smiling to herself when she found Edward sitting with his still-sleeping son in his arms, wrapped in the blanket Jane had covered him in the night before. She sloped against the door frame and crossed her arms as she observed them together.

Fatherhood had changed Edward Fairfax Rochester- not at his core, not in who he fundamentally was, but it had changed the purpose of his life. It felt like a very long time ago when he and Jane had shared quiet and vulnerable conversations in which he expressed his concerns over whether or not he could be a good father to his children given that the only father he had ever known was distant and cruel. And then, there had been other questions, questions regarding their own relationship, and how children would change their married dynamic. Jane had only ever heard that children came between marital unions and that they inevitably became a point of contention between a wife's wishes and her husband's desires. But now, after four children, those speculative conversations seemed naive and ill-informed. Jane and Edward, in sharing the responsibility of lives which were more important to them than their own, were brought as close together as any two living people could ever hope to be.

Jane stepped out of the doorframe but Edward did not turn upon hearing her footsteps. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders from behind and kissed his cheek before crouching down to her son's level. She smoothed his hair gently, watching the tenderness of his young sleep with endless affection for him.

"I wanted to say goodbye to all the children before I left" he whispered, Jane reaching around him and adjusting their son's blanket gently, "But now it is starting to feel all too difficult to leave"

She smiled softly as took her hand and brought it to his lips before pressing her palm against his chest and resting his lips against her arm.

Peter squirmed suddenly, but he did not wake. Instead, he settled easily back into his unbroken and untroubled rest as if nothing in the world could have pulled him from it.

"He's such a solid sleeper" Jane commented softly, "James was always so difficult to put to sleep. Even adjusting his blankets as I have just done would have woken him up, and he would have cried and cried until he tired himself out and could cry no more".

"Well, Peter is a much happier baby than James ever was. James fussed for the entire first year of his life"

"Goodness, do not remind me. How many sleepless nights did we endure then?"

"Perhaps if I had gotten more sleep I might be able to remember"

Jane smiled at her husband who stood up and laid their son back in his bed before reaching slowly for his wife.

"Come. I've delayed long enough. Eshton will be here shortly".

. . .

That morning, one of the last like it during that fall, was mild enough that Jane could stand out comfortably on the front step in just her dress and shawl without feeling the nip of the cold which normally hung in the air this time of year. Still, that air was damp, and Jane worried that Edward would catch cold riding in it all morning. He, however, felt differently. While he saddled his horse, rather unphased by concerns of the illness he might catch, Jane rubbed her eyes sleepily, reflecting that with only an hour longer of sleep she might have been better equipped to meet the day ahead.

"Six o'clock" Edward announced anxiously, shutting his pocket watch and putting it back into his pocket as he arrived at his wife's side, "I do hope nothing is wrong".

"I'm sure it is just Eshton running behind schedule, as usual" Jane assured him, "I would be more concerned if he was on time, truthfully".

Edward grinned, but not all of the weariness left his expression.

"Well, this is late, even for him".

"You will still have lots of time to arrive before dark" Jane assured him, "How long will the journey be on horseback?"

"I would imagine close to six hours, though not quite that long if we run into no trouble on the roads"

She shook her head.

"I must admit that I do not understand the appeal of riding for that long"

"You do not understand the appeal of riding for five minutes" he pointed out, "I never could fulfill my desire to make you the best horsewoman in the county"

"A silly, foolish desire to have on your part" she flared, "I told you that I would not become one of your society women when we married and I rather think I have lived up to my promise"

But the smile he shed upon her was suddenly coloured with more than his amusement. His face fell slightly, and he sighed.

"I will be quite lost without you, you know"

"I know" she said, "But we will not be apart long, will we?"

It had started as a statement, but it had turned into a question by the time the words passed over her lips. He touched her cheek softly,

"No, darling. I was a fool to imagine anything else. I promise we will all be reunited the moment it is possible".

Edward drew his wife to him gently and kissed her slowly, placing one hand in the small of her back and the other on her face. For a moment, the intimacy of the kiss, of being held by him in such a way, made her forget all place and time. She kissed him back, but a moment later Edward had forced them apart and she was looking up at him confused.

"Look" he said, tilting his head in the direction of the drive but not looking away from her as she turned and saw Eshton's carriage approaching. Though it was too far away for him to have seen anything, Jane still felt slightly embarrassed. Their eyes met again and Edward leaned forward, pressing his lips against her forehead.

"Soon" he promised lowly.

When the carriage did come to a stop in front of the house, Eshton rode up from behind it and dismounted his horse with surprising energy for so early in the morning.

"Good morning Ms Rochester '' he said, tipping his hat to her politely, "I must admit I am not surprised to see you, though my own wife was not bothered enough to leave her bed to see me off".

The Rochester's both smiled,

"I would be willing to bet that she was up rather late listening to you complain about the day ahead" Edward guessed, "And in that sense I cannot blame her"

"Nothing like old friends to know you better than you know yourself" he mused to Jane, Edward chuckling as his own horse was brought forward for him.

"I assume, then, Mr Eshton, that Anne and the girls aren't traveling with you this morning. When are they due to arrive in London?"

"No" he explained as Edward began saddling his horse, "No it would be far too much trouble to have them arrive before the house is set up. I had some extra staff travel ahead of me yesterday to help prepare, so I imagine they will be arriving tomorrow morning or afternoon. And speaking of-" he said, rounding on his friend, "Edward I have found a situation for you, and a rather convenient one at that, for it is the townhouse which adjoins my own".

"The one which belongs to your uncle?" he asked, looking over his shoulder as he secured his riding bag to his saddle.

"Yes, precisely. My uncle was due to return to town next week which is why I did not think to ask if I could use his house for our purposes. In spite of this, when he reached out recently and I explained our business and extended stay in town, he was all too happy to offer it to you. He said he would be content to remain shooting in the country".

"Well this is excellent" Edward said, turning to Jane, "You will be able to join us sooner than we thought".

"Well.." Eshton hesitated, "In truth, I do not know the state of the house, Rochester. It is my understanding it has not been inhabited for some time and God knows the state in which it was kept given that my uncle has been a lifelong bachelor. It might be best that you send some of your staff along with us now so that they could begin getting the house in order".

The arrangements did not take long to manage, and soon several of their staff were headed off ahead of them in order to begin preparing the old bachelor's townhouse. With this settled, Eshton and Edward both said goodbye to Jane, though Edward lingered longer than his friend who saddled his horse once again, not able to hear what was lowly spoken between the Rochester's.

"Thank you for everything, my darling. I will see you soon. Tell the children I love them, and know how much I love you".

And with that, Jane waved them both off, not going back inside her house until she could no longer see their silhouettes on the horizon. And as the sun rose, warmer and brighter than it had been before, she felt hopeful that all would go perfectly well until they were all reunited again.