Febuwhump Day 13 - Won't Regain Consciousness

Whumpee: Dean (mentioned)/Caleb

Caretaker: Caleb/Jim

Other Characters: Sam, Mac

Dean is 19

Sammy is 16

Caleb is 27

This one definitely made me emotional to write. It's nearly a month late but hey at least it's here.

Enjoy!

~TH~

Caleb paced desperately in the waiting area. Sam was pale, trembling slightly in his seat. It had been hours. Mac had gotten the first flight in and had been with the doctors for far longer than felt right. No one had given them any word.

"Caleb?"

The young man turned at the voice. "Jim!"

The pastor brought him into a quick embrace which Caleb didn't refuse. "How is he?"

"I don't know. No one's told us anything. We've been here for hours!"

"What happened?" The man went over, laying a gentle hand on Sam who looked like he was holding back tears.

"It was the ghosts MO. I should have seen it coming."

"What was the ghosts MO, Caleb?"

"Throwing men out of windows."

Jim frowned. "How high?"

"Second story." Caleb ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know exactly how he fell but he was on his back when we found him. He was… he was out of it, man. Didn't know when or where. He thought we were at your Farm, Jim. Remember when he fell from your loft?"

"I see." He looked down at the youngest Winchester. "Sam? Are you alright?"

"There was so much blood." It came out in barely a whisper. "It was everywhere. And… he wouldn't wake up." He looked up at Jim. "I know- I know Caleb said he did but he wouldn't and then I went to call the ambulance and then by the time I got back he-he wasn't even breathing."

Dean crashed twice more before they got him to the hospital. The radio silence was not helping their anxiety now.

Jim patted his shoulder. "If Caleb said he was awake I think we can take his word for it. But I'm sure your brother will be fine. Has anyone gotten ahold of John?"

Sam let out a snort. "I think it'd be easier to summon a ghost than to get him on the line."

"I see."

"I called. Left some messages. But we knew he was going to be out of range for a few weeks." Caleb offered with a shrug. "Who was hunter on backup?"

"Bobby." Jim answered. "And I wasn't able to reach either of them. Check in isn't for a few more days. I'm sure he'll turn up in time."

"In time for what?" Sam said with another eyeroll. "The funeral?"

"Samuel-"

"Don't say that!" Caleb snapped, "you can take your little pessimist act and leave because we don't need it here."

"Caleb-"

Sam stood, coming nose to nose with Caleb.

"Yeah well it's not like you're Mr. Optimist! If you had been watching Dean like you were supposed to this wouldn't have happened!"

"If I hadn't?! Pretty sure you were the one who was supposed to watch his back on this hunt! You ran off and let Dean be the bait!"

"Just because you're the Hunter in charge doesn't mean you're always right!"

"And just because you don't have a ring yet doesn't mean you can't take responsibility for yourself!"

"Boys!" Jim pushed between them, shoving them both back a step. "This is unacceptable! It is no one's fault. It was a hunt. Something went wrong. It's unfortunate, but it happens."

"Yeah well this happens to be Dean we're talking about!" Caleb sneered.

"I'm aware, Caleb." His voice softened, "I care for him too." Caleb deflated at that, running a hand through his hair. "I know we are all worried, but the only thing shouting at each other will do is to get us removed from the hospital."

"Shouldn't they have told us something by now?" Sam fell back into his chair. "Anything?"

"No news is good news, as they say." The pastor smiled.

"Don't think that applies here, Jim."

"Caleb, if Dean was dead they wouldn't still be with him."

"Can you sense him yet?" Sam butt in.

Caleb shook his head, "My head's still all screwy. I don't know if I hit it or…" or if he was trying to protect himself from the harsh realities around him.

"Jim, any word from John?" The abrupt greeting from Dr. Ames had them all turning.

"Dad? How's Dean?"

"John?" Mac asked again.

Caleb felt his stomach drop. No. Dean wasn't dead. He'd know. He'd have felt it. Even if his head was messed up he'd feel it.

"No one's been able to reach him. I may not be able to reach him until the scheduled check in."

The doctor's lips turned downward in a troubled look.

"Dad?"

Mac sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger.

"He has a severe subdural hematoma. We already drilled a burr hole but if the bleeding doesn't stop we have to perform a full Craniotomy."

"Why can't you just freeze him like you did last time?" Sam asked, having grown several shades paler.

"It's too advanced for that. Last time he was stable enough for us to be able to gauge our options. This time…" He let out a breath, dropping his hand. "Thankfully Dean is over eighteen so we've been able to do what needed to be done without parental consent but…"

"But his father should be here." Jim finished in a grave tone. .

Mac nodded.

"You think he's going to die." Sam whispered. "You- that's why you want Dad here! Because- because you think-"

"No!" Caleb growled. "No- just- just stop it!"

"Caleb, son-"

"No!" He held up his hands to his father. "No you don't get to look at me like that and tell me not to freak out when you're telling me that Deuce is gonna die!"

"We don't know anything but the fact that he shows no signs of regaining consciousness is… very concerning."

"You just drilled a hole in his brain! Of course he's not waking up!"

"It's not as simple as that. In some cases, yes, we would keep him in a medically induced coma. That's what we did last time something like this occurred. But this time we didn't. And he should have woken up within a few hours of the procedure."

"That doesn't mean anything! So the kid's tired, taking a bit longer to wake up, that's not a reason to start sending out for funeral arrangements!"

"Son-"

"No. I'm not staying here and listening to this crap. Call me if you have any real news." He stormed past his father, barely resisting the urge to intentionally knock him out of the way.

His dad didn't know what he was talking about. He wasn't just one of his patients. This was Deuce. He was different. His whole schtick was overcoming impossible odds and the idea that they were just… giving up on him!

Caleb started pacing when he was out of the hospital and outside in one of those stupid gardens. As much as he couldn't be in there, he also couldn't stray too far. If the worst were to happen- no stop- now he was thinking those cursed thoughts. He wouldn't lose Dean. He couldn't. He genuinely did not think he could handle it. Losing anyone else would hurt. Hurt like he'd only felt once before. But Deuce was different. That was the kind of loss he knew he would never be able to recover from.

"Caleb?"

The man stopped but kept his back to the pastor. "Really not in the mood for a chat, Jim."

"Maybe not, but I believe it would be good for both of us. Would you mind if we sit?"

He almost said no. Almost told the pastor to go back to his mourning sheep and leave him to his strained hope. In the end, he relented, joining Jim, who was already seated, on a metal bench.

Silence passed between them for a moment. Jim spoke first.

"No one has given up hope, Caleb."

He let out a snort. "Coulda fooled me."

"Your father is… concerned. He simply didn't want you to be caught unaware."

"He's going to be fine."

Jim smiled, "I'm glad to see you've taken my sermons about faith to heart."

"He can't die, Jim. I can't- I can't lose him."

"And I pray you never will, but don't mistake Mackland's clinical coldness for a lack of faith or assume that he doesn't care. You know him better than that."

Caleb ran a hand over his face. "I know. I do it's just- if you had only seen him. He was so… so out of it. And…" he looked away not wanting to rehash what the gnawing fear was telling him might have been his and Dean's final moments together.

"I'm sorry you had to see him like that, but I'm sure he appreciates you being with him."

"He- he said it was better this way." He looked up into the pastor's kind eyes, feeling tears forming in his own. "I think… I think he thought he was going to die. And he was okay with it. He said it was okay because I made him real. I don't-"

The Guardian's eyes widened and tears had begun streaming down his face.

"Jim?"

"You made him real." He smiled a watery smile. "That's a remarkable feat for someone like Dean."

"What does that even mean? I thought he was talking out of his head."

"Have you ever read the Velveteen Rabbit?"

"I think I remember seeing a copy of it at the Farm, but I don't think I ever read it."

"Becoming real can only happen when something is loved beyond imagination. Dean once asked me if he could ever become real. And I told him truthfully that I didn't know."

"But you love us. Dean knows that. And Sam does even when he's being a brat. Even John loves him even if he's awful at showing it."

"But it's more than that, Caleb. It means that Dean believed, Dean knew, that no matter how broken he was or would ever become, that your love for him wouldn't change."

Caleb swallowed. He wasn't sure how he felt about such high praise from either the Guardian or Dean. He loved Deuce. He loved him like he imagined he would have loved his own little brother. But to hear that Dean considered his love above even his own families… It was an honor and yet a special kind of pain.

"Wait," He said, putting together some of the pieces that had felt so scattered before. "Broken, like physically?"

Jim seemed surprised at the question. "I-I suppose. In the book it's more allegorical than-"

"He knew that even if he couldn't walk again it wouldn't change anything for me."

"Caleb? I thought our concern was his head-"

"It is but… but he lost feeling- was paralyzed. I don't know if-if it was from his head or something else. And he was scared. Scared of how his dad would react. He thought it would be better to just- just slip away then have to deal with that."

"But you made him real." The pastor whispered.

"Is it- is it possible that he's not waking up be-because he doesn't want to? Because he's scared? He knows it wouldn't change anything for me but-"

There was a new brand of horror in Jim's voice. "It would for everyone else. You're the only one he feels views him with any intrinsic worth. Other than you, he believes he is only worth what he is able do. And if the paralysis did turn out to be permanent-"

"It would be better to not wake up at all."

(To be continued)

~TH~

I Know that I talk a lot about the Velveteen Rabbit but Ridley started it and I'm obsessed.

I've been writing mainly short one shots lately due to time, but I think you'll like tomorrow too. Hopefully at least.

I currently have it set for me to post chapter three of this on day 23 but I obviously can't promise it's going to be out in ten days, however I shall try.

Much love guys! Please, please, let me know what you think!

God bless,

Jamie