WELCOME ALL TO EPISODE 2 OF MY NEW SERIES BASED OFF OF THE HIT MOBILE GAME. HOPE YOU ENJOY!
After the events of Korea; Bob, Cat, and Tank Cat make their journey to their second location: Mongolia. Once they set up the Cat Base, they chill out in their new location. Bob is doing sit ups, Cat is holding down his feet for support, and counting his total, and Tank Cat is reading a book on the history of Cat Food.
Tank Cat: Oh boy...am I hungry for Cat Food! he approaches Cat and Bob Hey Cat? Is there any spare Cat Food?
Cat: 97...98 Oh Tank! Heh, you scared me! Yeah there should be some Cat Food in the storage! Now Bob where were we? he resumes his counting Okay! 99...100...101...
Bob: Damn...what's with you two and CAT FOOD? It can't be that good...it's just fucking food!
Tank Cat and Cat both eagerly get up and make their way to the storage room. Bob has no other choice but to follow along and ask the question lodged inside his head for a while now.
Bob: What exactly is Cat Food to you...? Because it doesn't seem like just food to you...he shakes his head and looks at the pile curiously...Droga. (Damn it)
Tank Cat: stuffing his face with Cat Food Glad you asked Bob! Cat Food is our main monetary unit between us and the other branches of the organization! So we use it to buy items, a payment method of getting what we want, a Thank You gift...And most importantly...FOOD! There's another reason too...but we're keeping that a secret at the moment!
Cat: also stuffing his face with the delicious treat Yeah...it is a lot more important to us than you think...hell, it provides rich nutrients so we can battle easily! It has a shit ton of protein, a lot of the good fats, iron, calcium, vitamins B, D and E, and 25% water content! All in a few calories...he giggles as he cleans his face
Bob: chuckles quietly Okay...fair enough! But now we have to make our way towards those shitty enemies with the Portable Tent...those fuckers are NOT ready for what's coming to them! flicks his toothpick in his mouth
Cat: RIGHT! he puts away his Cat food, and slaps Tank Cat's off his paws, to his sadness Okay...their base is located just outside! It's the one that looks like a bunch of sticks supported by a thick layer of cloth! Looks simple...but I believe Doge is back at it again...and he most likely brought company. UGH!
Tank Cat: HEY MY CAT FOOD! But wait...what shall we do with these enemies? I'll soak up all the damage, don't worry!
Bob: Nice one Tank Cat! Me and Cat will attack them from behind you. I just need to beat the shit out of that dog! And his little friend...cracks his knuckles
Cat: OKAY MEN! LET'S DO THIS!
Bob, Cat, and Tank Cat make their way outside to the Mongolian base, to which they meet Doge, and another enemy, a snake.
??????: Hey Doge, is that the one giving you trouble? he points at Bob I'll show him HELL!
Tank Cat: gulp That's Snache...he's a tough one! He's stronger, more durable, AND faster than Doge! I underestimated him when we first met...
Cat: Yeah...me too. Let Tank Cat do all the soaking, he'll make things easier! Come on Bob listen...
Bob: spits out his toothpick, and cracks his knuckles I'm not letting some reptile put me in my place! Leave it all to me!
Doge: Hah, pathetic! Alright Snache, I'll go after the Cats, you take on the boy! He slowly walks towards Cat and Tank Cat, revealing Snache in his entirety
Snache is just like Cat, Doge and Tank Cat, a cartoonish looking white snake, with a similar size to the former two. He has a spiked mouth, and a tail which makes up his entire torso and lower body. On it, he has gray spots, supposedly made out of water colors. And two large black cartoonish eyes, like everyone else. He makes his way towards Bob.
Snache: Hey there kid...for your information, I don't even know who the hell you are...but I'm not standing for your disrespect towards the Shiba...I'll ask this only once...Who are you? he hisses as he slithers towards Bob
Bob: Another one bites the dust huh? My name's Roberto Mourinho Jablovskyy, but everyone calls me Bob. I'm 16, and I'm not from here...I was supposed to make it to a disciplinary camp, but I ended up with these Cats, who are now my friends. Now is your chance to run off and hand us the Superior Portable Tent...otherwise I'll have to TAKE it from you...your choice! he grins menacingly
Snache: Bring it on, motherfucker! But I'm way more agile than Doge is, heheh. he pounces at Bob, starting the battle
Snache sticks his teeth into Bob's torso, making it bleed out a little, he also uses his tail to slap Bob left and right, causing irritation.
Bob: RAH! This...won't kill me...Snache. coughs up blood
Bob grabs Snache by the tail, and slams his body into the ground, causing his head to bleed out and bruise up, he manages to get up but is visibly injured.
Snache: AGHH- cough You...RUINED MY WATER COLOR PAINT! he stares at the gray stain on the ground, he snarls at Bob THIS WILL BE YOUR DEMISE, BOB!
Bob: Heheh...so you're telling me the spots on you are fake? Coisas típicas, Cobra! (Typical stuff, Snake!)
The two rush into each other, Bob grabs Snache, and runs over to a nearby lake. He shoves him into the water, his water colors completely off of him, now he's Snow White!
Snache: YOU FILTHY CUNT! shivering from the water THAT TOOK ME AGES TO GET DONE. coughing up some blood stained sand
Snache attempts to stab Bob with his tail, but Bob grabs it, crushes the tip, and throws him onto the battlefield floor, causing his body to crumple up.
Snache: GAAAH! he breathes heavily, not knowing what's coming next
Bob: Any lasts words before I throw you into your friend over there? he points at Doge, who seems to be injured by Cat and Tank Cat
Snache: Weakly ...Fuck...you...he glares at Bob coldly
Bob: Heh...my kind of language! ADEUS! (GOODBYE!)
Bob grabs Snache and flings him onto Doge. Catching the latter entirely off guard, the two fly up and land on hard concrete on the side of the field. Snache's tail really whipped Doge hard, as now he has a severe cut on the right of his abdomen. Both of them are severely battered, bruised, and bleeding.
Doge: WHAT THE FU-!...ow...
Bob: What a win...too bad the Cats didn't see any of it...
Suddenly, Cat and Tank Cat make their way across to Bob, they start cheering out his name and shaking him. The two of them are mildly injured from Doge, however, no blood or bruising is present.
Cat: WOOHOO! YOU REALLY SHOWED THEM, BOB! Isn't that right Tank Cat?
Tank Cat: he embraces Bob in a tight bear hug and shakes him around THAT'S RIGHT! He took care of Snache like he was nothing! And helped us finish Doge in no more than 2 seconds! We saw EVERYTHING Bob, and we even got to see Doge land head first on hard concrete! Hahah, Cat and I are proud of you!
Bob: Heh...I guess I'm really using my strength and aggression for good, eh boys? he makes his way towards the Mongolian base, and once AGAIN, gets all 3 types of treasure available Now the two of you look absolutely fucked. Let's head back, fix you up, and celebrate our win over cat food!
Cat: WE'RE fucked? Oh my god, look at you bro...he walks over to Bob and gently caresses his injuries with his paw You took almost all the damage for us! And you're showing blood! Let's feed you some nice warm cat food, our treat.
The three of them make their way back to the cat base. And are celebrating their second win over a game of Poker, the chips being replaced with Cat Food of course!
Cat: All in. And just like that, I win! He greedily takes all the Cat Food and grins Too bad boys!
Tank Cat: Hey good game Cat! I wonder how you're so good at Poker...you must be a gambler, damn it!
Bob: Ah Gatos! (Oh Cats!)...I want to try some of this Cat Food you all have been drooling over. Please don't be exaggerating about how good it is and have been lying to my literal face, or I swear I'm going to kick your bitch-ass faces in.
Cat: Ah-HA! You finally want some eh? Okay, it is actually super delicious stuff. B-But you're NOT taking any from my pile! Oh no I have someone special give them to you.
Tank Cat: THIS is what I was referring to by the way, heheh. He nudges Bob
Cat proceeds to do a loud, high-pitched meow, causing a God-like figure to be summoned out of the clouds. Causing a thunderstorm to occur. The figure in question is a MASSIVE Cat with a body identical to the one present in "The Creation of Adam" by Michelangelo, and long, curly dark blue hair. The only Cat thing about him is his face, which is similar to Cat's. This is no other than THE CAT GOD!
The Cat God: You call me? I'm God! What can I do for you, my feline worshippers!...and HUMAN?! He is visibly confused on the sudden human present with his cat worshippers
Cat: Open a singular tin of cat food and hand it down here! It's for the Human, do not fret! He is one of us, our Deity!
The Cat God: You got it. Sit back and watch me work! he summons a tin of Cat Food, and opens it in front of everyone, Bob is gobsmacked Okay! That'll cost two tins of Cat Food, one to make up for the one I used, the other is for profit! he lifts two of the Cat Food tins from the Poker game and they go up into the clouds MAY THE CAT GOD BLESS YOU ALL! he vanishes into the sky, the weather clearing up again
Bob: Damn...what a waste of Cat Food...bro WHY NOT USE A FUCKING CAN OPENER? He shakes his head in disappointment ...Típico(Typical)
Cat: giggles and blushes nervously Eh...we may or may not have lost the can opener...heheh...BUT THAT'S NOT THE GOD DAMN POINT! Try the Cat Food!
All eyes are on Bob, even the Cat God from afar is watching down on him. He stares at the open tin, and takes a bite of the Cat Food.
Bob: Huh...it's actually not that bad! Damn, this is pretty good. I'm afraid it's not the "best food ever" you two are making it out to be, but it tastes nice. Solid 7.
Cat and Tank Cat smile brightly at Bob's positive reception of the cat food.
Bob: Wait, if there's a Cat God, does that mean there's a Cat Jesus or some shit? Or a Cat Holy Spirit or whatever the fuck.
The two Cats just stare at him, almost as if he's speaking an entirely different language! (Other than Portuguese of course)
Tank Cat: Huh? What do you mean by that Bob? Is that like a celebrity or something?
Bob: What, no, it's-...Actually, fuck it, never mind. Let's just get the information we need on our third adventure! Cat?
Cat: One second...he reads through a log book The next country is China! Here lies the inferior, normal, and superior Shark Fin! It's bound to be quite an interesting journey, that's for sure! It's also where Axe Cat is located...
Tank Cat: Okay everyone, let's get ready, big journey soon! Come on!
Bob: Who the hell is Axe C- the two left before he could speak...oh fucking hell! he rushes into the Cat Base to get ready for China
TO BE CONTINUED
Alright! That's another episode of my new fiction completed, here, we saw Snache make his debut, as well as the Cat God himself! I hope you all enjoyed this edition as much as its prequel. Stay tuned for the third edition!
The Battle Cats (2014) and all of its characters and features are owned by Ponos Corporation
The Character of Bob is owned by me, however, feel free to use him, just as long as you credit the owner
This piece of fiction is highly unofficial. This can be considered as fan-made content.