A/N - A little content warning for this specific chapter as one of the characters has a panic attack. It's a relatively small section, but if you skip over it, it shouldn't take away from the main themes.

As You Wish - Chapter 18

Ginny could tell that something was off as soon as Draco got home from work. While it wasn't out of the ordinary for him to look tired at the end of a work day, today seemed to be at a higher intensity than she was used to seeing.

Normally, he would at least stop by the living room and maybe relax for a bit before going back upstairs to change for dinner. But this time, Draco skipped stopping by the living room entirely and made a beeline for his bedroom.

The genie waved a hand in front of her TV, hoping that the minimized noise would give her some kind of clue as to what was going on.

"Draco?" she called out, standing up in preparation of possibly needing to go upstairs.

When she didn't hear a response, Ginny transported herself to his door, waving away her signature red smoke before knocking. "Draco? Are you okay?" She pressed an ear against his door, hoping to hear some semblance of life.

In response, she heard a muffled grunt, which was good enough for her. She slowly opened the door, not knowing if he was in the middle of getting undressed, only stepping inside once she realized that her master had flopped down face first onto his bed. The messenger bag he used as a briefcase was in a lump on the floor beside him, with his feet dangling off the edge of the bed. Ginny laughed when she noticed that his shoes were still on.

She walked over to the opposite side of the bed and laid down next to him. She laced her fingers together and rested them on her stomach before turning her head to look at him. "Rough day at work?"

Draco could only give a muffled "Ughhh" in response, which caused his genie to laugh again at his dramatics. She rolled onto her side to face him, using two pillows to prop up her head. She poked at his shoulder, trying to get him to roll over. When that didn't work, she resorted to an open palm slap on his back.

"Fuck that hurt!" he cried out, finally rearranging himself so he was also on his side, looking at Ginny.

"Well, that's what you get for being a little baby. Was today really that bad?"

Draco pouted, which only served to make him look even more like a child having a tantrum; but after a moment, his face relaxed and he sighed. "Work was fine. It's just…" he paused as he trailed off. He didn't want to do this, but the timing wasn't going to get any better, so he might as well get it out of the way now. "It's just that we need to talk, Gin."

Ginny scrunched her brows. "Okay, but we talk all the time. Is there something specific you need to talk to me about?"

"Yes," he replied, sighing again. "We need to have the talk."

That caused the genie to sit up. What was there for them to really talk about at this point? Like she told Harry, his actions did more to show who he was than any weird discussion they could have. She furrowed her brows again as there had to be a specific reason why he was doing this now. She crossed her legs like a pretzel and faced him. "I thought we were at the point where we didn't need to have this kind of talk."

Draco sat up, copying Ginny's seated position. "I thought so, too, but I was asked to do something to help out my mother's charity and it made me realize that I needed to have this talk with you in order to prepare myself for the one I'm going to have tomorrow."

"What kind of talk are you having tomorrow?"

"Well, even though my mother is the one who mainly oversees her charity, I sometimes help out depending on the circumstances. We're currently funding a research team working on merging elements of Muggle medicine with wizarding medicine to help people affected by certain curses. And this research team requested the help of Hermione Granger, so I'm meeting with her and your brother tomorrow at my office."

The last name Draco used for her friend didn't go unnoticed by Ginny. "Did she not change her last name when she got married? Hermione told me she was planning on it."

As the genie looked on at her master, she noticed how uncomfortable he looked at her question. Did something happen while she was gone?

"The reason for that is that, from what I've been told, Hermione and your brother postponed their wedding after you went missing. She felt responsible for your disappearance since you were last seen with her."

Ginny didn't know what to say. Every time words tried to escape her lips, she found that nothing she tried to say even came close to a coherent phrase. It didn't help that she suddenly had a lump in her throat; choking her anytime she opened her mouth. How could she be so stupid? How could she play house and make believe with Draco and his friends when her friends and family were still being affected by her disappearance. How could she be so selfish to think that they'd be fine without her? Or that no one else would bear the consequences for her becoming a genie?

She thought about how worried Hermione must have been the following morning. She thought about her family coming together to scour the ends of the earth trying to find their beloved daughter, sister, and friend. It killed her knowing that her brother and his fiancé made the decision to postpone their wedding because of Hermione's guilt. She ruined their happiness because of a drunken whim to chase whatever her own version of happiness was supposed to be.

Her breathing was slowly becoming more rapid as she continued berating herself and tears started spilling over onto her cheeks. Oh, no. This was not a good time to have a panic attack. Her vision blurred from her tears as she started opening mouth sobbing from the news. She began gasping for air, realizing that she might actually pass out if she couldn't control herself.

When she finally could find the words, they were in between gasping breaths, repeated as though they were a mantra.

"This is all my fault! I ruined everyone's lives! This is all my fault!"

Once he realized what was happening to her, Draco lunged forward and wrapped his arms around Ginny. He knew that she would continue to blame herself, but he didn't know what he could say in the moment to make her feel better. This was entirely different from the time when she first saw Harry.

He began rubbing a hand along her back, trying to get her to slow down her breathing again. When that didn't work, he started taking slow, deep breaths himself; hoping to get her to copy him. "It's okay, Ginny. Just take a deep breath for me. Follow my breathing and we can figure this all out."

Although she could still tell that she was crying, Draco's words seemed to cut through the noise of her sobs and Ginny tried to match her breathing to his. Soon enough, all she could hear was the pair of them breathing in sync. In for four and out for four. She had buried her head in his neck at some point, so when she looked down, she could see his chest expand every time he inhaled.

After her breathing stabilized, Draco lifted her head to look at her. He used a thumb to wipe away the tears on her cheeks. He had never imagined that his life would become this; sitting on his bed, comforting Ginny Weasley, recognizing that this was part of being in love.

Love.

The word hit him like a Bludger to the stomach and he had to take another deep breath to recover. But it was true. Sometimes loving someone meant helping them back up when they were feeling their worst, knowing that this would eventually be a small bump in the road in the grand scheme of things. He had never done this before with any previous girlfriend. His last serious relationships were at school and Lucius would've scolded him for showing such signs of affection. Such actions weren't something that a man would do. Instead, Draco learned to compartmentalize, reasoning that, again, his father wouldn't steer him the wrong way.

But there was no longer a need to compartmentalize. There was no longer a need to hold onto the angst that plagued him during his last two years of school. All he needed to worry about was the woman in front of him; the last person he would have ever anticipated falling in love with.

"Are you okay? I'm sorry for telling you about this, but I felt that it was only fair to tell you what's going on. I didn't want you to feel like I was still hiding things from you." Draco ran his thumb across her cheek again.

Ginny closed her eyes and sighed, allowing the weight of her head to rest in the palm of his hand. It was a lot to process, but she couldn't be mad at him for being the bearer of bad news. In her drunken desperation, it had been easy to forget in the moment that her decision was selfish. The timing couldn't have been any worse. She was barely an adult when she became a genie and, if she could have done things differently, she would have simply taken a break from everything in her life. She could have broken up with Harry to see if she was actually in love with him, or if she was just in love with the idea of him. She could have gotten a job that would allow her to travel the world instead of staying in her rather insulated bubble. Ginny had forgotten that there were people in her life that felt responsible for her safety and wellbeing.

She could feel more tears trailing down her cheeks as she realized what an asshole she was. Now all she felt was guilt and shame. So she continued to sit there in silence, letting the emotions wash over her, forcing herself to not linger on them too much lest she have another breakdown.

Once she was able to stop crying, she could focus on the man in front of her. How nice it felt to really be held by him, how nervous she got from this outward display of affection. As he wiped away her tears with his thumb, she couldn't help but think about how nice it would be to kiss him as a thank you.

The Kill Bill sirens had gone into overdrive in her head, but it didn't matter to her. She felt protected, she felt cared for, and it made her wish that she had become Draco Malfoy's genie sooner.

She sat up, waved a hand, and watched as a box of tissues fell into the space between them. After a couple of good nose blows, she took a look at him. "Oh my god, I'm sorry for getting your shirt and neck all wet," she said with a laugh. Another sniffle to try to clear her nose.

Draco grabbed a tissue and dabbed his neck. "It's okay; shirts can be washed." His eyebrows wrinkled together with worry. "I just want to make sure that you're okay."

Ginny sighed, still feeling like there was a slight weight on her chest. "For now, I'm okay. Thank you."

"Did you still want to talk? I understand if you don't want to continue."

His genie nodded her head, to his surprise. "I knew we would have to talk about the past sooner or later, so I would rather it be the sooner part and keep moving forward."

"Do you want to go downstairs?"

"No, I like being in a comfortable place." Ginny looked around, realizing that she had never been in Draco's room at his apartment. She narrowed her still puffy eyes as she took in her surroundings. His room was almost like its own little suite. To the left of where she sat was a love seat, chair, and coffee table, which made her think that he initially brought his breakfast upstairs before he started sleeping at work. To the right was the entrance to his bathroom. Deep emerald tiles with silver accents. Of course his bathroom had his House colors. Ginny couldn't make out all of the features, but she did take note of the rather large standing shower he had.

There was definitely room for two people in there.

Ginny needed something else to distract her from everything, but she didn't think her brain would resort to thinking about her and Draco in his shower. How he would have her back pressed against the cool tile, his mouth slowly kissing the space where her neck and shoulder met. His right hand resting flat on her stomach before sliding down, his fingers slipping into her wet — wait. She knew it had been a while since she had actually been with anyone, but she didn't think she was that desperate to think about how nice it would be if Draco bent her over so he could fuck her as water — nope!

What is wrong with me? Ginny thought, rubbing her hands against her face. She knew that reaching a certain level of intimacy with him was a great way for her to show him how she felt, but this was not the time! The only explanation she could think of to explain her thoughts was temporary insanity (and intense sexual frustration, if she was being honest). Because why else would she go from having a total breakdown to wondering if Draco was any good at giving head?

She could feel her face getting warm and Ginny found herself feeling grateful that crying always made her skin a little blotchy. She did not need to give her master the wrong idea.

Draco raised an eyebrow. "So my bed is that comfortable place right now?" He needed to keep it together, especially as he never thought that he would see Ginny in his bed. But this was the wrong time to be thinking about her hair splayed out across his pillows, his hands holding onto her thighs, and his tongue licking her — oh, fuck.

It didn't help that Ginny smiled at him as she said "Yes." He kept reminding himself that his genie was in a heightened emotional state right now and he was an asshole for thinking about fucking her after she just finished crying. He took a deep breath, standing up to change out of his suit because it suddenly felt very tight on him.

"That's fine; I'm just going to go change real quick." He dashed to his closet, loosening his tie at a speed he only remembered from his school days, back when he had his brief dalliances with Pansy or Daphne.

"Do you want me to make us pizza?" Ginny called out, realizing that neither one of them had eaten dinner yet.

"Yep! Sounds good to me." Draco looked down at himself and wished there was some kind of spell to get rid of his erection because sweet fucking Merlin; thinking about his genie made him a horny teenager again. Since there was no such spell, he settled for giving it the finger in frustration before lifting it so it was flat against his stomach. It would settle down eventually, but he did not need to show this side of himself to Ginny. Yet.

Fucking hell, he thought to himself. It would be a miracle if he made it through the rest of the night alive. He was certain now that the genie sitting on his bed was some kind of cosmic punishment; a way to taunt him with someone he desperately wanted, but couldn't be with due to whatever the hell his life had become.

He sighed, then begrudgingly put on a t-shirt and the loosest lounge pants he could find. The more fabric billowing around his nether regions, the better. Satisfied, he walked out of his closet to see her still on his bed, her hair in a messy bun, opening the pizza box in front of her.

He could get used to this.

Ginny looked up as she took a bite of her favorite white pizza, patting the space next to her, implying that Draco should sit there.

She passed him the pizza box once he was seated, then conjured up a foldable table, placing it in front of her so they had a place to rest their food or drinks.

The food seemed to put her in a much better mood as he noticed that she had gone back to her normal demeanor while eating. After finishing her first slice, she turned to him. "So, I don't know if it's just me, but I've always been curious as to why our families hate each other."

"Would you believe me if I told you that it's probably because you have Muggles in your family lineage?"

Ginny looked at him, an eyebrow raised. "You're pulling my leg."

"Ginny, I wish it was something more complex and convoluted as that. Hell, even all of my comments about your family's financial situation were only influenced by my father."

The genie looked up at the ceiling. "And here I was, thinking it was some weird, medieval blood feud that went back centuries." She looked back at her master. "How did you find out?"

"I asked my mother," he replied while chewing. "After you became my genie, I sent her an owl at some point asking about it. She actually didn't know too much either, so she did some research for me. She said that hatred of the Weasleys was a more recent thing. Apparently, your ancestors made it clear that they weren't as pure-blooded as some of the other old wizarding households, which did not go over well. They were simply proud to have some Muggles here and there on the Weasley family tree."

"Did your mum feel the same way as your dad?"

"Kind of," Draco replied, while shaking his hand. "She was more about pure-blood supremacy since that's what she learned from her family. My father was always more fanatical about Voldemort than she was, though. And she really hated it when I was being forced along the path to becoming a Death Eater. Thankfully, she's loosened up a bit since the war. I think my father going to prison forced her to rethink her world-view. Hell, me asking her about the feud even helped her realize that it was time she rebuild her relationship with my Aunt Andromeda. I think they're getting tea soon."

Ginny placed her hands behind her and leaned back. "Do you mind if I ask you about your short-lived stint as a reluctant Death Eater?"

He was hoping that he could avoid the topic, but he did mention it when talking about his mother, so he might as well get it over with. He sighed. "It was terrifying, if I'm being honest. My parents fought a lot leading up to my induction, but, contrary to what I'm sure is popular belief, my father wasn't the type to strike my mother. He may not have been the most affectionate person, but he does legitimately love her. Instead, both of them would throw things on the floor or against the wall when they had one of their shouting matches."

"How did you feel about your involvement?"

"During my fifth year, I was genuinely excited. It felt like I was making my father proud and following in his footsteps. I thought I would have real, tangible power in wizarding society as a Death Eater. I'm sure I've mentioned this before, but all I ever heard about was how majestic Voldemort was. That following him was an gift only given to a select few. So I thought that when I got my Dark Mark, it would feel like a badge of honor. The summer between my fifth and sixth year was when things started to turn." He paused when he noticed Ginny turn to face him. She grabbed a pillow and held onto it in her lap.

"I can see why you would feel that way. Especially with your mindset at that time." She conjured up a large mug of tea and took a sip.

"Yep, so it felt like I had made it, but that quickly went away when I was given my first assignment."

Ginny let out a small gasp. "Harry told me about it."

Draco nodded, subconsciously grabbing his left forearm for a mark that was no longer there. "For once in his life, his intuition was right. He knew I became a Death Eater before our sixth year. I remember feeling so smart, so sure of myself for figuring out how to do things right under everyone's noses. But I wish I never knew what it was like to use an Unforgivable Curse on someone." He paused again. "I wish I had said something to Dumbledore sooner, or at least took him up on his offer to protect me and my mother when I tried to complete my task. My father told me he couldn't be trusted, but the old man would have protected me." Another pause, this time accompanied by Draco leaning forward and placing his chin on his hand. "My family lost Voldemort's favor after Dumbledore's death since we weren't as extreme as my aunt. He thought we weren't ruthless enough. It was only then that I realized that he wanted me to fail as punishment for my father's failure. Once Voldemort had taken over Malfoy Manor towards the end of the war, I went to bed each night hoping I'd be alive the next day."

He sat back up when he realized that he had started crying as he was speaking. Ginny noticed and she immediately wrapped her arms around his shoulders. "You're just as much a victim as I was," she mumbled, her forehead resting on his right shoulder. She conjured another box of tissues, pulled one out, and handed it to him.

Her master blew his nose and folded it in half to wipe down his face. "Fucking Merlin, Ginny, I almost forgot my father did that shit to you. I'm so sorry you had to go through that." He flopped down on his bed and stretched out his legs.

His eyes were closed when he flopped back, so he could only feel Ginny lying down and shuffling to be shoulder to shoulder with him.

The genie laced her fingers together as she placed them on her stomach again. "You were only twelve when your father gave me the diary. As far as I could tell, you weren't some criminal mastermind at twelve, so I don't want you to apologize for something that you had no control over. Your father should be the one apologizing, not you."

Draco laid there, his nose still stuffy from crying, but he felt a wave of relief come over him. It felt different getting the kind of empathy he didn't think was reserved for him anymore. Prior to that, he only felt that from his Housemates. Many of them lived a similar experience, or were close enough to him to understand his actions. This was the first time someone from the perceived "good" side had bothered to listen to his thoughts on his role in the war.

He felt the urge for physical contact with Ginny again, but this one was different.

This time, he imagined himself cradling her face with both hands as they laid facing each other. He was slowly peppering her face with light kisses: her brows, her closed eyelids, her forehead, the tip of her nose, her cheeks. She would be giggling after he kissed her nose since she found the action to be cute. So he would kiss both sides of her smile, causing her mouth to go slack before he slowly pressed his lips onto hers. And there he would stay for a moment, relishing in how good her lips felt against his. He would break away, moving his arms down to her waist, to pull her in for a hug. He would then place his right hand on the back of her head and she would sigh in contentment as she snuggled in closer.

The thought of that was more impactful than any of the more lecherous thoughts he had. It was a possibility of a life filled with mutual affection and love.

These next few months were going to be hell for him.

A/N - As always, thank you for reading and/or commenting! This was definitely one of my favorite chapters to write, so I hope y'all enjoyed it.