Another day, another chapter! Welcome to Chapter Four of Dawn is Just A Heartbeat Away!
As always, thank you to everyone supporting me over on !
Neolithic Knuckledraggers: Here_I_Am!, Ice fox, Jeffrey Jankoviak, JVR, Matthias Rogowski, Maziel Andrea Garagatti Montero, Timecka, and Tempist
Bronze Barbarian: Luke Baccus
Iron Intellectuals: Aelynn, Bev-Ann Morris, Dragon Guy, Mars, Moltas Akerstrom, MouthyStorm, Razor McCutchn, Stephen Grote, WanderingDaemon, White57Worms, and Zane Norton
Machine Menace: Amanda Ellis
If you love FFXIV, love quests, or both, head on over the my quest The Epic of the Steel-Fated Hero on Questionable Questing! It's three chapters in and is looking to go so delightfully off the canon rails it should be hilarious!
Finally, please consider updating the TV Tropes for this story!
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Dawn Is Just A Heartbeat Away (Hope Is Just a Sunrise Away)
Chapter Four
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Hades didn't try to hide his amusement as the blushing, stuttering child tried and failed to get a proper apology for 'ignoring him' out, remembering another individual that could be a clever-tongued, quick-witted show-woman one moment and a tongue-tied amusement the next. Waving off her apologies and aborted attempts to decide whether she should be kneeling or saluting under the circumstances, he slowly moved up beside her.
"My mantle of memories, and my most favored painting, to boot." He repeated, and the girl's flush deepened.
"Ah, I'm sorry for wondering the room and not minding my own business, Radiance. You have my deepest apologies for my intrusion." She apologized again, sounding rather more coherent than previous attempts as she started to get a handle on herself, and he waved his hand again.
"I hardly expected you to sit in a chair with your eyes shut and your fingers in your ears waiting for my arrival, young lady." He responded airily, unable to resist placing a slight emphasis on the word as he remembered saying something similar to her previous incarnation far more times than he cared to count. She laughed a little, awkward but genuine, at the mental image before looking back at the mantle, eyes drawn to the painting.
"The mantle is beautiful, Radiance, and the painting is exquisite. If you will allow me to ask, who are the people beside you? I would have thought to recognize them from my history lessons as a child, or from other images, if they were so familiar with you as to be displayed here, but I have never seen them before." She asked, and Hades knew her interest was two-fold. The interest of one of his citizens, wondering who could be so close to her ruler as they yet go unrecognized…and the instinctual interest born of unknowing recognition.
"You would not." He responded simply, twelve-thousand years of loss suffusing those three words, before continuing. "They were my closest and dearest friends, closer to me than any other could ever dream of being. I lost them…long, long ago, long before the Empire. Longer than I care to remember. The first, the man, was lost to me when he chose to sacrifice his life in order to save my own. Taking my place in a required sacrifice so that I could continue to guide and protect our people, a destiny he felt lay in my hands rather than his own despite my protests."
He had been angry with Hythlodaeus, so terribly angry, when the other man revealed that he had offered himself to the Convocation in his own place, decreeing that their star had a far greater need for the Guardian of the Aetherial Sea than the Chief of the Bureau of Architects. It was the duty of the Convocation to sacrifice themselves for the sake of the star, he had argued, but Hythlodaeus had been utterly unmoved. Yes, the Convocation served the star, he agreed, but the mighty and wise sorcerer Hades would be a far better guide for the -post-apocalyptic ruins of their home than a single Architect amongst thousands, an architect who (though he had superior Sight to all) was a spell-wielder of abysmal levels.
"The second, the woman…like the man, she was one dearer to me than any other, but she I had known since we were little more than children. I cannot remember a moment of that time without her involved in some fashion, cannot recall so much as a day of my life before I knew her. She was fierce and proud and brave, a warrior beyond anything you can conceive, and dedicated utterly to the preservation of our people. Nothing was more central to her heart, more significant a part of who she was, than that. Yet it was that dedication that led us to quarrel terribly, the last time I saw her face, and she left. Left and died alone, forsaken, on some distant and gods-forsaken battlefield with my anger in her ears. My condemnations, my bitter words and accusations, believing I hated her and thought her nothing more than a worthless betrayer of all that we stood for. A regret that has been as acid in my veins ever since."
Oh, his dearest friend, how long had he suffered from the memories of his cruelties to her? Words of appalling wickedness, spoken as known falsehoods to cut and bleed her heart and mind, to give himself the savage satisfaction of hurting her for 'turning against him'. As if he should have ever expected that any Azem, never mind her, would agree with neither regret nor hesitation to sacrifice half of their people to summon Zodiark, and summon more besides to restore their world to the way it was!
She would not have been the woman she was if she had.
"What happened?" the fragment asked, and he sighed heavily.
"I won't do it, Hades. I won't vote in support of such a measure!"
"***, you must! The Convocation will not tolerate insubordination this time, not even from you!"
"Damn the Convocation, Hades! Mine is the Seat of Azem, Shepard of the Star and Counselor to the people! No one has the right or the authority to forbid me from carrying out my duties, nor order me to act so directly against it!"
"It was decided that some multitude of our people would need to be sacrificed to save the rest. Not an easy decision, or one any of us wished to make, but it was acknowledged by all that doing otherwise would result in the loss of us all." He explained, the echoes of her her vocal, stubborn defiance before the Convocation as she argued with burning passion against the plan resonating through his mind. Better that they took up arms and fought for the future of their world, rather than sacrificing it to summon an icon of fear, she had said. Let them fight until the cause of the Final Days became clear, and remove the problem at it's source. "All except her. She refused to support the plan, and led those who followed her to meet the enemy head-on. And so she died, along with all those she led and those she sought to protect."
"She sounds like a good woman. A woman who would not abandon her principles, her beliefs, to take an easier path when the path forward grew unforgiving." The fragment said quietly, sounding pleased and respectful of Azem's choices, and Hades didn't try to restrain the harsh bark of laughter that the comment tore from his throat as he nodded in agreement. Yes, that was one way to describe her, though he had a few choice adjectives he would add in. There was a moment of silence, both of them looking at the painting, before she continued tentatively. "Did you…was she…that is to say, were you lovers?"
The question was a startling one, an absurd one to his mind. He and Azem, as lovers? Partners of the romantic sort? The idea was absurd, fundamentally absurd! Yet, he couldn't deny that many of his words, his descriptions of her and of their time together could lead someone to that conclusion, and he shook his head again.
"No, no, nothing of the sort. We tried, once, somewhat at the urging of our friends and families and somewhat because being together romantically seemed a logical extension of our deep and abiding friendship, but we found it more awkward and embarrassing than enjoyable or arousing and quickly discarded the experiment to return to the way things ought to be. Not long after that, she found she was far, far more interested in women than in men, and I found my own partners." He explained, getting a thoughtful nod from the fragment. He had to wonder if she was seeing any parallels to her true self and her current, fractured one. Probably. A soul, even broken into pieces, was still the same as it had ever been. Oh, the details might change, the expressions and displays, but souls themselves were immutable.
He still remembered the first time the two of them had attempted to have sex. It had been a disaster in every sense, with the both of them struggling to be aroused. It wasn't as if he hadn't found her beautiful, of course, she had (and he thought this with all due impersonal and factual evaluation) been one of the most beautiful people in all of Amaurot. She was also, he had quickly discovered, in a mental box that had long since been labeled with her name and nothing else. It wasn't quite correct to say he had considered her genderless, he wasn't blind or stupid, but it had never been much of a part of who she was to him, and he hadn't been able to change that fact so as to see her as a woman to be desired.
"At any rate, you would never have heard of the two of them. None in Garlemald would have." He finished finally, and the fragment nodded again, eyes locked onto her painted face. He considered leaving it at that. He had his confirmation after all, but that didn't feel enough. No, it wasn't enough at all. "You remind me a great deal of her, actually, and not least because of your desire for beautiful women and your tendency to get your-self into trouble with them, from what young Gaius tells me."
He felt no small amount of delight at the way her blush, which had just begun to fade, returned with an intensity he didn't think was humanly possible without an excessive amount of chemicals. He was having the most fun he had had in decades, and for a moment he was in another time and another place, teasing another radiant-souled heroine with a penchant for passion. She and the fragment both were stern, brave, even stoic. Premier fighters with tongues as wicked as their weapons. The very image of the mighty, awe-inspiring hero. And both were utterly helpless in the face of certain brands of teasing from certain types of people. It would seem so absurd to many, for both soul and fragment, but he knew and understood far better than most that such people wanted a caricature of a hero, a perfect icon, not a living and breathing human being.
"I am honored, Radiance. She sounds, to me, like a woman well-worth emulating. A true hero." The fragment said after an embarrassed cough, obviously trying to the change the subject, and he grunted in response, mouth twisting slightly as his thoughts briefly took on a bitter tinge.
"Yes, a hero until the moment she died." He agreed, gazing into her laughing eyes. His voice dropped, low and deep and seething, as he continued, more to himself than the fragment. "I will create a world with no need for such heroes."
That was his dream, his goal, his most heartfelt desire. A return to an ancient perfection where heroics meant putting down disobedient prototype creation entities or helping put a stop to a volcanic eruption, not being torn apart in the midst of an ashen world by demons born of nightmares. He shook his head again, feeling a bit cross for himself. He had never been so prone to emotional reminiscence as he had been since becoming Solus, and it had only grown worse since the ball. Even now, she was driving him to distraction. No doubt his lamentations would only grow in the future, now that he had found a portion of her once more, and one no less troublesome at that.
"Well, you are quite correct that emulating her is the best course you could ever follow, though I must stress that I thoroughly disapprove of recklessness as a matter of course, and I would certainly echo young Gaius' recommendations that you make sure any targets of your flirtations do not have possessive or jealous lovers waiting in the wings." He said finally, pushing the memories back yet again. The fragment gave an awkward giggle, bobbing her head rapidly in agreement, and he continued. "You need not fear retaliation from my foolish kinsman. My grand-son made clear to him, and I shall make it clearer still, that his behavior was unacceptable for a scion of my House. His betrothment with the young lady will doubtlessly not survive her father's wrath, though I advise you be careful about accepting any rewards or proposals from him. His gratitude will be genuine, but so will his desire to achieve any ulterior motives he might possess. And he will possess them."
"I understand, Your Radiance." She murmured, ducking her head, which only grew lower as he rapped her skull sharply with aged knuckles.
"I hope that you do. Your courage, fortitude, and morale strength do great credit to both yourself and your mentor, but do not imagine that they will ensure you victory, safety, or happiness in this world. They are only capable of taking you so far, and if you do not temper your brashness and your obstinacy, you might find that 'so far' is rather less than you might hope or imagine."
The warning was entirely genuine. While he acknowledged, despite his wishes otherwise, that she would doubtless die in one of the Rejoinings or on a battlefield as she spread the chaos required to enact them, he did not wish to see even a fragment of his beloved friend rejoin the Lifestream due to gross stupidity or arrogance. It would shame the soul entire.
"I…I will obey, Radiance. I will not lie and say that I fully understand, but I will obey. I swear that I will not disappoint you or my Lord Gaius." The promise, despite her lack of understanding, was a fervent one. One that was meant, but it wasn't enough. Testing her with the stone wasn't enough. Her reaction to the painting wasn't enough.
Long fingers reached out, flicking open the case, to extract the Constellation Stone. A flicker of aether, invisible to the fragment, resulted in a large linked chain trailing behind it, and he held it tight in his hand for a long, long moment before turning to face her fully. A wordless twirl of his finger had her turning to face him, and he reached out to settle the freshly-forged necklace around her neck, the symbol of Azem gleaming between her armored breasts.
"See that you do not. I am entrusting this, the mark of my most beloved friend, to you. Perhaps, with you, some fractured portion of her shall wander the world once more, banishing its evils and bringing Light to it's people." He said, and she stared at him with wide eyes, shaking her head in mingled disbelief and refusal.
"Radiance, I cannot possibly accept this! It is one of the few things you still have that belonged to her, a precious relic from someone you lost. It should remain here, safe, not go with me from battlefield-to-battlefield half a star away from you." She protested, her own hands going to the chain, planning to remove it and the gem it held from her body, but he gripped her shoulders tightly with a strength that was doubtlessly surprising for a man as old as he.
"This is not a request, suggestion, or invitation. This is a command from your sovereign. You will take that crystal. You will protect it, cherish it, keep it on your person every waking moment of every day. You will honor the memory of my dearest friend, you will continue to serve her ideals." He ordered in a tone of clear command, one that would permit no further disobedience or protest, and she swallowed heavily before nodding, ducking her head in submission. Satisfied both in that obedience and its genuine nature, he released his grip on her limbs and stepped back slightly.
He was playing with fire, he knew, tempting fate by providing a Constellation Stone to a fragment without consulting the other members of the Convocation, or at least his fellow Paragons. Never mind providing this entirely illicit Constellation Stone to a fragment of the 'treacherous' Fourteenth Seat. He was actually somewhat surprised that his god was not punishing him for doing so, but perhaps Lord Zodiark was not Rejoined enough to do so? It was not as though he had ever acted so unilaterally and in a way that was not directly in pursuit of a Rejoining before, and this certainly could not be claimed to be an act that would bring about a Rejoining, not by any stretch of the imagination.
None-the-less, it was a decision he had made and would, if time were wound back, make again. It was not, after all, as if a single young woman, no matter whose fragment she was or how talented a fighter, could possibly prevent the oncoming Calamity. If she managed, somehow, to survive Dalamud's fall, the idea that she would live long enough for the Calamity after that to occur was absurd. Far more likely was it that she would die on some distant battlefield, as the soul had, and he would reclaim the Constellation Stone from her casket. Yet even with that being the case, he still would have given some small aid and comfort to a fragment of that precious soul.
A miniscule tithe to a colossal debt.
"What was her name?" the fragment's question was quiet but serious, and he hesitated for what seemed an eternity before responding.
"Eos. Her name was Eos." He responded finally, and she nodded as she wrapped a hand around the Stone. There was a pulse of aether, and before his very eyes a small, continuous circuit of soul energy began flowing between fragment and object. A circuit that, if it had not already been confirmed by the hue of the fragment, would have confirmed her Amaurotine identity.
"Eos. I will remember her name, Radiance, and I will honor it until my final breath." She vowed solemnly, and he nodded again before dismissing her back to her legate's side. The door shut behind her, leaving him alone once again, and he returned his gaze to the painting. A ripple flowed across it's surface as the minor glamour he had placed upon it faded away like a light mist before a strong breeze.
The changes the glamour had made were minor, even miniscule. Just enough to subtly shift the features of Azem, to make the…family resemblance less obvious. It wouldn't have done for the fragment to see them, to recognize them and wonder why one of her emperor's oldest friends looked very much like herself. In fact, looked exactly like she would probably look in another decade or so. As beneficial as her suddenly being a rumored grand-child or great-grandchild of his, making the inevitable civil war that would kick off upon his death (Nerva was going to try and proclaim himself Emperor, Hades was positive about that) even more chaotic, he found himself oddly reluctant. Using even the meanest fragment of Eos as a pawn in the political strife he intended for Garlemald sat ill with him, and he rationalized it as being a pointless complication. She lacked the support or the power-base to affect the results in any meaningful way, so why bother?
There was a knock on the door, one of his adjutants opening it and quietly reminding him that his next scheduled duty was rapidly approaching, and he felt an almost-nostalgic smile briefly crease his lips. Another lecture to her soul, followed by her departing on an adventure, followed by him being stuck in meetings for the rest of the day.
Some things, it seemed, echoed across the millennia.
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Gaius van Baelsar rocked slightly with the motion of the transport as it made it's way through the occasionally-tumultuous air towards Ala Mhigo, hardly noticing after so many years of service, his attention thoroughly focused on his slightly-frowning, deeply contemplative protégé.
Aeliana had been virtually silent since they had left the Imperial Palace, observing only the courtesies entirely required of her, and even then doing so with a distinctly distracted air. Obviously, whatever had happened during her meeting with the Emperor had made a great impression upon her, and he was willing to bet every coin he possessed that it had to do with her new necklace.
It was beautiful despite it's simplicity, but it was not the sort of necklace that a young woman, never mind a young soldier, would receive from an Emperor who was grateful for the young woman's gallant defense of an imperial cousin. Nor did it seem to be any form of punishment or possess malignant traits, not that he would imagine His Radiance ever doing that. The man wasn't pointlessly cruel, wasn't a monster mutilating and butchering for personal amusement like Zenos, nor would he prevaricate in such a way. If he wanted to punish Aeliana, he would have done so, and he would have made sure that Gaius was aware of it as well.
He was considering how to breach the subject with her, how to coax her from her silence, when she finally broke it of her own accord.
"You grew up with the Emperor's son, right sir?" she asked quietly, and he blinked in surprise, not remotely having expected that question.
"Yes, Julius and I were very close indeed as children. It would not be unfair to say that I was at their home just as much as I was my own, and vice-versa." He confirmed, curious as to where she was going with this, and somewhat pleased that she remembered that. He had mentioned once, in passing, that fact when mourning his dead friend on Julius' nameday. It had been little more than a handful of words during a short interaction, but it seemed she had not forgotten it despite that, nor had she ever mentioned it again. Though, now that he had cause to think about it, there had been many times after that, on that particular anniversary (and that of Julius' death, for that matter) where she had done seemingly random and minor acts of kindness or comfort. Ever so stoically, of course.
It seemed his protégé was quite subtle and cunning when she wanted to be comforting while allowing the both of them to save face.
"Did…did you ever hear someone named Eos get mentioned? An old friend of his, a comrade?"
The question was tentative, even hesitant, and Gaius realized that this question, or at least whatever had brought it to mind, was what had been weighing on her since her meeting with the Emperor.
"I do not believe so…" he answered slowly, glancing at the necklace thoughtfully. "Not that I can recall in front of me, at any rate, but I was little more than a child at the time. Once I got older, I was less his son's childhood friend and more his loyal subordinate. Not the sort of person with whom he would have emotional recollections of old friends. Deceased friends, I assume?"
"Yes, he…this gem, the necklace, it used to belong to her." She said, before going on to explain everything that His Radiance had said about the woman. The reason for the depth of her thoughts was obvious to the meanest mind once he was fully informed. A heavy burden had been placed on her shoulders, a mantle of great emotional significance to their ruler that she had been commanded to live up to. As her explanation wound down and she fell silent for a long moment, he recognized the look of someone grappling with what else to say. "I…I don't know what to do, sir. How can I live up to someone I know so little about? How can I possibly hope to match up to a woman that was a contemporary and close friend of the emperor himself?"
"To the first, I would say only that you should continue as you are. If he feels that you are like her, that you remind him of her, as you have lived your life and comported yourself thus far, than I can only say to continue being the kind of person you have been until this point." He proposed, and she looked flabbergasted by that simple piece of advice. Well, she was young and in some not-so-minor turmoil at the moment, so perhaps he shouldn't hold her sudden degradation in cognition against her. Though perhaps some extra training on maintaining her ability to think critically and discerningly while under such stresses was in order. "To the second, he didn't command that you match up to her, only that you honor her. The difference seems subtle, but is significant. One is an impossibility, a goal that cannot be attained and would serve only to torture you as you failed. The other is entirely possible and well within your capabilities. Stop driving yourself into a frenzy with feelings of inadequacy and hesitation. They will provide you with no benefits and will only hamper you in your efforts."
Yes, if there was one overarching flaw that Aeliana had, it was her penchant for second-guessing herself into oblivion. On the battlefield she was decisive, quick-minded, clever, and talented. It was only when she had the time for doubt that she was afflicted. The shadows of her past, it seemed, clung to her tightly despite his efforts. Well, it would be a long, long time yet before she would serve far from his side. He had more than enough time to finish polishing this gem to radiance.
Settling back in his seat, The Black Wolf began quietly planning his next series of lessons for the girl he hoped would one day succeed him.
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