Fitz extends his hand out to Olivia and waits for her to come to him as the first rays of sunshine of the day appear in the purple, cloudy sky.

Often, in times before, this had helped. Confrontations were inherent to their dynamic. The constant effort to not let outside pressure and circumstances break them apart meant arguments, sometimes yelling, sometimes aggressive whispering. It wasn't ideal but talking helped.

This, however, had always been his favorite type of reconciliation. He always did have a way with words but the same could be said of his touch. Olivia's tendency to distance herself from him could always be confronted with it. He grins to himself, tonight she'd done it too. In anger and in her own way she chose to draw closer.

"Why are you doing it?" Olivia asks while she finishes buttoning up Fitz's light blue shirt on her body. "The memoir." She leans on his side of the bed and interlaces their fingers.

His gaze lingers on their hands intertwined. "Most of my life I lived what someone else planned for me. I want to make sense of where I fit in all of it."

"You want closure," Olivia states.

"Yes."

"Do you want to publish?"

"No, not this version. This one's for me." He traces the back of her hand with his thumb. "I haven't done it yet but I plan on talking about you eventually. Do you mind?"

"No, not for this version at least. It's part of your story." Olivia holds his hand tight. "What did you write?"

"My family, for the most part, growing up with them." Fitz looks at Olivia in thought. "Do you want to read it?" It's an invitation, but he knows it will be better with her notes and assistance.

"I'd like that."

Fitz pulls on Olivia's hand and rests his other hand on her waist drawing her closer until she rolls on top of him and settles beside him on the bed. With the tip of her fingers, she traces circles on his arm and then his chest.

"Fitz?"

"Yeah?" he responds, eyes closed, relaxed by her presence beside him.

"Did-" Olivia furrows her brows and gathers the will to continue, "dating help?"

He exhales, the reticence in her voice familiar to his ears. "Sometimes." He wraps his arm around her in a tight grip. "I liked having company. It made me miss you more, though."

Olivia lets out a thin smile.

"What?" Fitz asks, feeling a slight change in her mood.

"I would compare everyone to you."

"No one was as smart as you. That's the first thing I noticed," he replies with a grin. Not sure if she'll answer, hesitantly he asks. "Did you have the same pattern with everyone?"

"I don't think so. I went on many first dates, had sex, and then stopped taking their calls."

"Ok." Even if the hints of jealousy make themselves known, Fitz reminds himself, it's her life. "Was that in the beginning?"

"No, it was after that. I didn't make an effort in the first years. I mostly skipped the date part."

"Washington elite?"

"Most of them, yeah." Olivia thinks about her life and cringes a little. "I always had a bad habit of mixing work with pleasure."

"It's a small place."

Olivia nods in agreement. "At least none of them were my boss."

Fitz shakes his head in amusement and slightly pinches her arm. "What else?"

"You're doing that thing again."

"Well, we got sidetracked last time."

Olivia rolls her eyes. She didn't know what she expected, he'd always been persistent. "Tell me something."

"I saw you once."

That's enough to make her sit up and detangle herself from his arm. Olivia sits cross-legged, impatiently waiting for Fitz to continue. When he doesn't, she squeezes his thighs. "How?" she asks pointedly.

"I wasn't supposed to be there so no one knew. Remember the Haynes wedding?"

"Yeah, that was me."

"I figured it was PR."

"What were you doing there?" Olivia inflates with the knowledge of his attention in a moment she wasn't privy to.

"I had to ask his father for help. I needed to swing some votes for the supreme court nomination. Cyrus made me do it in person. It was the only chance we had."

"That was before the divorce," Olivia comments.

"Yes."

"I was within reach."

"Yes. It felt very symbolic, the last time I had seen you had been at a wedding too." His smile is sad as Fitz gazes straight ahead. "I did watch you for a while." Fitz scrunches his nose at the realization of what he's just said. "Wait, is that creepy?"

"No, you love me too much for that," she reassures.

Fitz glances at her in surprise, satisfaction edging on his smile. "You're getting cocky."

His delight is contagious and with it, Olivia grows more serene. "Were you sad?" she asks, genuinely curious.

Mindful of the way she glows, Fitz beams when he answers. "It gave me a boost of energy that lasted for weeks."

"That's dramatic," Olivia says.

"It's true." He shrugs and Olivia's face softens.

"I know. You always had a fondness for the melodramatic." Olivia bites her lip, gazing at him, the softness of his features, and how calm he is, she takes a deep breath. "I used to interfere with the presidency," she admits and waits for his reaction, fearful of the confession.

Fitz smiles brilliantly. "That took you long enough."

"You knew?" she asks, mouth open.

"It was hard not to notice. Some plans couldn't have been Cyrus', too much of you on it."

"You never said anything?"

"Of course not." Fitz brings his hand to his chest emphatically. "What if he stopped?"

"This isn't fair," Olivia pouts.

"What?"

"You got parts of me while I mostly didn't have anything."

Fitz can't help but roll his eyes. "Yes, you did. You're just greedy." Fitz tilts his head to the side. "You needed information to help," he points out matter-of-factly.

"Not the kind I wanted."

"Because work isn't part of our relationship?" he asks softly. "You got to hear my thoughts."

Olivia smiles. "I did get a high whenever my notes showed in some of your speeches."

"See? It's almost foreplay when you think about it."

"Don't push it," Olivia replies, more entertained than she lets on.

Neither of them speaks for a moment. Once again they had been closer than previously thought.

"Mellie called me once."

Fitz's eyes widen. "What?"

"She asked me to come back. It was near the divorce. I only connected the reason why after."

Fitz sighs, that does sound like something Mellie would do. "I'm sorry," he says.

"It wasn't your fault." Olivia tries to appease the regret in his tone.

"Part of it is," he laments. "What did you talk about?"

"She invited me over to the White House, I said no, then she offered me a job."

"As what?" He frowns.

"I don't know. We didn't get to that. I didn't want to talk to her. I basically said no and hung up."

"I'm sorry you got dragged into it, even if just a little."

Exhaling heavily, Olivia focuses on her hands and her nails. In any way she can, she avoids eye contact. From the moment it happened, she wanted to know the reason. "Why did you do it? The divorce."

Most of his actions were understandable, she could trace his thought process, why some decisions were made, and the logic behind them. It made her feel closer, knowing she could recognize the reasoning behind his actions. Yet this was one of the small selection of decisions that left her bewildered, nothing made it make sense. Had she still had any access to him she knows she would've done anything in her power to change it, the risk was too great.

"I thought that was going to be the first thing you asked." Fitz searches for signs of hurt on her face, and when nothing similar to last night appears he continues, "I couldn't do it anymore. We got too good at pretending. I hated myself for it. And there was the lying and trying to manipulate me. I had nothing to lose besides approval ratings."

Olivia doesn't try to hide her displeasure. "Those are important."

"I know."

"It could've destroyed the rest of your term."

"I know." He smirks. Her concern about the job had often surpassed the care for his personal wishes. "Were you worried?"

"Yes, for you, for the presidency. Cy had a heart attack."

"Yeah. I went to the hospital when I could."

"Me too."

"James was furious."

"Your divorce almost caused another." Olivia loses herself in her thoughts and memories for a moment. "I'm happy you did it for yourself. It wouldn't have been as meaningful otherwise," Fitz's eyes are warm and tearful as he listens to her. "I'm proud of you." Olivia squeezes his hand.

Olivia loses herself in thoughts of the divorce and their years apart and once again comes to the conclusion of the impossibility of not forgiving him. She doesn't have to fully understand or be happy about his actions. She's loved him for almost a decade, there's no other alternative but to forgive him, remember her pain, and forgive him again. What she had hoped for throughout the years, the multiple fantasies, the different possible outcomes, those conjured-up versions of them aren't real, Fitz in bed with her, is.

"Liv." Fitz pulls her back from her reverie.

"Yeah?"

"I have a fundraising gala here in D.C. next month. You don't have to answer now and it's ok if you don't want to. But do you want to come with me?"

Somehow Olivia didn't remember his ability to surprise her again and again. "You're asking me out on a date," she comments with a grin.

Noticing how thrilled she is, Fitz's eyes sparkle. "Yes."

Fitz's giddiness and the glimmer in his eyes are infectious, but still, Olivia experiences a wave of anxiety and dread that threatens to overwhelm those other emotions. "Do Jerry and Karen know?" she asks reticently.

"Yes," his voice is calm and comforting. "I told them years ago."

Olivia blinks a single time, stunned and taken aback by his words. When it came to seeing his kids again, the mere thought was harrowing. Whether she liked it or not she had been a factor in the destruction of their parent's marriage. "Which parts?" the question is uncertain.

"Most of it, the important ones. That I fell for you, that I cheated, that you left."

"What was their reaction?"

"Mixed. They had been begging for so long for me and Mellie to get a divorce or at least separate. Karen was fine but Jerry didn't speak to me for a month. He's always been more sensitive."

Olivia strokes his jaw and places a kiss on his cheek. "Just like you." With Fitz next to her, only their shoulders touching, the familiarity brings her some comfort. "What happened after?"

"We talked about it, me loving you. We weren't together but telling them felt good. Things eventually came back to what they used to be, they understood me a lot better though."

Olivia takes in his words with care. Her spirits lighten back up as relief settles in. The absence of an overcomplicated home life soothes her nerves. "Do you think they'll want to see me?" she asks, reticent of what this could mean for them. "One day I mean."

"Yes. They're older now. I'd need to talk to them first though," Fitz kisses the top of her head. "If you say yes I'd tell them you're going to the gala in case something leaks, but after that, we can try to set something up."

"We've never done meeting family before," Olivia says.

"I know." Fitz smiles, clearly enjoying the situation.

"We've never done public before either," Olivia muses.

"I know," Fitz replies, mostly giving her room to process her thoughts.

"I'll think about it. The gala."

"Okay."

Olivia takes advantage of her position on the bed and rests her head on Fitz's shoulders. Taking in his smell and the warmth of his skin, she relaxes. "If nothing comes up, can we not go out today?"

"Yes," he whispers more than compelled to let himself be lured into spending an entire day with her doing nothing. "Do you have any ideas?" Fitz licks his lips, deeply satisfied at the lust that graces Olivia's expression.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed the chapter. Shoutout to everyone that reviewed this story, it's very fun reading your takes on the characters' actions and emotions and it does make the writing process less lonely. It also means a lot that so many of you have stuck with me so far. I know the story is very slow and barely anything happens but I hope reading it brings you some comfort. Til next time xoxo