Thank you for your patience.
I do not own Teen Titans
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Waves from the Jump City bay sloshed gently against the pier stands, well below where people stood enjoying the afternoon air. The blue-green waters with their white foaming waves made for beautiful scenery on a pleasant afternoon stroll. Seagulls flew over the water, hunting for fish, or circled above the pier waiting for one of the few tourists to drop something for them to steal.
A gentle breeze swept across the pier, stirring Raven and Starfire's hair as they walked slowly toward the end of the pier. The breeze kept blowing Raven's hair into her face, interfering with her eating the frozen yogurt they had bought. She huffed as she pushed her hair back for the millionth time, irritated that she had not thought to bring a scrunchie or something to use to pull her hair back out of her face.
Kori had stopped crying for the most part, now she was only sniffling as she ate her strawberry and vanilla frozen yogurt. Raven had been surprised by the alien girl's choice of flavors. She was even more surprised that Kori had not asked if they had any unusual flavors like pickle or mustard available. If that wasn't a sign that she was pregnant then Raven didn't know what was.
Kori sat down on a bench still sniffling. Raven sat down next to her, taking a bite of her chocolate frozen yogurt. The cold, sweet treat was a perfect way to break up the intensity of the afternoon. For both of them. Between her emotional ringer of a morning with Gar, the panicked teleportation to the tower and packing session that followed, and then Kori's crisis, Raven felt drained. It did not help that the entire time she had not been at full strength thanks to her trying to help relieve some of Nightwing's emotional burden.
It was a miracle that Raven's powers had not blown them all into oblivion by now, with her emotions riding the worst and most complicated rollercoaster ever. Her only saving grace was that Kori was still in shock, but with how strongly the orange young woman felt things Raven either needed to be in better shape emotionally or far, far away when the shock did wear off.
"When did you-" Raven was cut off by Kori's eagerness to talk.
"Two weeks ago, the night of the charity fundraiser. We snuck off to have intercourse during the dancing."
Raven stuck her spoon back into her half-eaten yogurt treat, the snack no longer appetizing. Kori's innocence tended to make some conversations uncomfortable.
"Not what I was going to ask, but okay."
"Oh, my apologies." Kori began to tear up again as she looked dejectedly at her yogurt. Raven instantly felt horrible for making her friend feel worse.
'We are the worst friend ever...' Timid squeaked from Nevermore.
'Nah, red's just over sensitive is all." Rude supplied. The comment was then promptly followed by a belch.
'Perhaps the emotional strain is making everyone more susceptible to lashing out.' Wisdom provided.
Raven sighed wearily and massaged her forehead. This many emoticons pushing through to make themselves heard caused a massive headache.
"Kori, I'm sorry. That came out harsher than I meant."
Kori sniffled and nodded her head, indicating that she understood and forgave her friend.
A few moments of silence passed between them before Raven felt comfortable enough to continue.
"So...ehem, it happened two weeks ago..." Raven clarified. Kori again nodded.
"When did you find out?" Raven asked, shifting in her seat.
"Last night," Kori whispered. Another tear streaked down her face.
"What did Dick say?"
"He does not know."
"You haven't told him yet?" Raven asked surprised. "I thought all of this," she motioned to Kori, "was because of his reaction when you told him."
Kori shook her head hard.
"I...I am," she hiccupped but kept going, "I am worried about what his reaction will be." She practically wailed.
Raven looked around to see if anyone else heard her friend's broken cry. An older couple several yards away were giving them strange looks, but they were far enough away that they couldn't hear what the girls were talking about.
Satisfied that the team's privacy wasn't about to be blown to hell, Raven turned her attention back to the once again crying alien next to her. Kori hiccupped and sniffled, trying to keep from full-on crying in public. Raven placed a hesitant but comforting hand on her friend's shoulder as she thought of what to say.
Raven still was not big on physical touch, but she was far more comfortable with it now than she had ever been. She accepted Kori's hugs willingly, even eagerly sometimes. She no longer minded Cyborg's occasional hugs, individual or group, or Nightwing's rare and awkward shoulder pats. Even so, she would only occasionally initiate the contact and only ever with her teammates.
Garfield himself was another story. While his physical contact was welcomed, Raven still avoided it like the plague. First of all, for appearance's sake, she did have a reputation to uphold after all. Secondly, while she had a far better handle on her emotions than ever, Garfield was the one person who could still make her lose control and she did not want to risk imploding whatever building they were in at the time.
Kori's sniffles brought Raven back to the present, however, and she tactfully asked the first question she could think of.
"I thought you had been discussing the future lately. Has this subject not come up?"
Kori shook her head.
"We have discussed it briefly, but not in detail."
"And?"
"He said that he was not ready. And that it was safer if we waited until...until..."
"Until you weren't on the team anymore." Raven finished for her. She tried to look understanding, but for some reason, disappointment was all she could feel at her friend's admission.
Kori nodded, disappointment riddling her face.
"We both decided to wait a few years. Raven, I am not ready either!" She cried as she flung herself forward, face in hands, shoulders shaking as sobs overtook her.
Raven, surprised by her friend's sudden, yet somewhat expected outburst looked on in stunned silence. A moment later her senesces kicked in, and she scooted closer to her distraught friend on the bench. Placing an arm around Kori's shoulders, Raven attempted to comfort her.
"It's going to be alright Kori. We'll figure out something, and Dick won't be mad."
'I hope' Raven thought.
Kori shook her head.
"No, no, no! We cannot, I cannot do this! Not now!" Kori cried.
Raven looked at her friend, stunned. Yes, Kori was the more emotional of the two of them, and yes this was a very stressful and emotional situation, but even under these circumstances, her friend was being a bit overdramatic.
"Kori-"
Suddenly Kori lurched forward and clutched Raven's shirt in a death grip. Her eyes were wide and desperate. They reminded Raven of a wild animal who was cornered.
"You have to help me." Kori pleaded.
Raven frowned down at her friend, confused.
"Me? What can I do?"
Kori seemed to calm down a bit as she sat up and let go of Raven. She took a deep breath and looked at Raven again with those big, green, pleading eyes.
"On Tameran, there was a spell that the sorcerers used for times like these."
Raven raised a brow, already skeptical of where this conversation was headed.
"I do not remember all of the components to it, but it put a pregnancy on hold or paused it so to speak until the parents were ready for the responsibility."
Raven balked, but she tried to hide it from her friend. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Kori's feelings, again, and make the situation worse.
"I was hoping that you would be able to perform the spell on me."
Raven took a deep breath to focus. She needed to be honest, but also gentle. She thought for a moment and consulted with Knowledge. The whole time Kori sat there looking hopefully at Raven as though her entire world, her entire future, depended on Raven.
Raven shifted in her seat. She did not like the feeling of her best friend putting all of her hopes and dreams on her shoulders.
After a moment of silence, Raven took another deep breath as she prepared her answer.
"I'm sorry Kori, but I can't."
Kori's face fell, and new tears began to streak down her face.
Raven hated the look on her friend's face, but steeled herself to continue crushing her friend's spirit.
"There are no records of any spell like that on Earth or in Azarath. I've never heard of a spell that is even similar to that. And even if there was, the amount of power it would require, plus how delicate and precise it would need to be, I would worry about accidentally hurting you or the baby. So many things could go wrong, and without knowing first-hand what the long-term effects would be, the payout would not be worth the risk. I'm sorry Kori, I want to help you but it's not possible and even if it was, I still would not perform the spell. It's too dangerous."
A new round of sobs broke from Kori's lips as she seemed to crumple in defeat. This time Raven did not hesitate to embrace her friend.
They sat there like that, Kori wrapped up tightly in Raven's arms sobbing for several minutes. The initial shock seemed to be finally wearing off and waves of emotion rolled off of Kori onto Raven. Powerful waves of pain, fear, and disappointment slammed into Raven's mental walls continuously. She tried to grit her teeth and bear it, but soon the emotions became overwhelming.
Finally, Raven could not take anymore. Without thinking, she started siphoning off Kori's emotional weight.
Too late she realized that she had not prepared herself mentally or emotionally. Before she knew it a tidal wave of emotion slammed in her, nearly knocking her over. Disoriented and overwhelmed on a whole new level, Raven tried to refocus so she could shut the siphon off. But every time she started to get her bearings she was hit with a new wave of powerful emotions.
Kori was beginning to look lighter and calmer. Her sobs had stopped completely and her tears were slowing. She began to look more alert and peaceful. Raven could feel the shift in emotions to calm consideration, sadness, and guilt for her panic. Raven also felt a bit of joy beginning to peak through.
Finally, Raven got her bearings back and shut off the emotional pipeline.
Nausea hit her like a ton of bricks. The world began to spin and she felt as though her head was filled with helium and about to float away. The edges of her vision began to darken and she felt like she weighed a million pounds. Her arms and legs started to shake as she tried to keep her grip on reality.
"Raven?"
Kori sounded distant like a million miles separated them.
Raven groaned and doubled over clutching her stomach.
"Raven!" Kori placed a soothing hand on her back, concern flooding her voice.
"I'm...good..." Raven rasped.
Her chest felt tight and her head began to pound relentlessly. She barely registered Knowledge chiding her and Love cheering her on.
"You are not "good"! Something is wrong! We must get you back to the tower-"
"No," Raven sat up and another wave of dizziness hit her hard. She tried to focus on Kori but only succeeded in making herself cross-eyed. "I'm fine. I just need a minute."
Raven focused on her breathing. She closed her eyes and assumed her meditation position as she had done so many times before. At first, she concentrated silently, focusing on her healing powers as they moved quickly through her body. Soon she began to feel some relief. The nausea went away, the pounding in her head began to subside and she felt more grounded and balanced physically.
Eventually, she started chanting her mantra quietly out loud and after a few more minutes of meditating, she felt more like herself.
She opened her eyes to find Kori looking at her skeptically.
"Really Kori, I'm alright. I promise."
Kori did not say anything, she simply frowned at Raven, unconvinced.
Raven sighed and rolled her eyes. She stood and spun slowly in a circle. While the action did not help her feel any better, it did not send her to the ground like it would have a few moments earlier.
"See?" Raven said exasperated.
Kori still looked unsatisfied but seemed to accept that Raven was not about to fall over and die.
"What happened? What caused you to react in such a way?" She pried.
"Um..." Raven scrambled to think of a reasonable excuse that would satisfy Kori and be nowhere near the truth. But before she could answer, their communicators beeped simultaneously.
'Oh thank Azar,' Raven thought as she grabbed her communicator and answered.
"Finally! I've been trying to get ahold of someone for 15 minutes now!" Cyborg exclaimed over the line.
Raven frowned.
"This is the first time our communicators have beeped."
Cyborg's already present frown deepened.
"Weird...and not good. I'll have to look into that. But later, right now we have a call that needs to be responded to."
"What's up?" Raven asked and then winced at her phrasing. She had spent far too much time around Gar lately.
Cyborg noticed too and raised a brow, but did not say anything. Whatever he was calling about must be urgent.
"Someone called in a loiterer over by a construction site downtown. The description matched one in the League of Assassins files that Batman sent over. Someone needs to go over there and check it out. I called y'all cause I can't find the guys. As I said, I've been trying for the past 15 minutes, and nothing! I'm headed there now, but I was on the other side of town when the alert came in and it'll be another 20 minutes before I can get there."
"We'll go." Raven offered. They were not that far from downtown and there was no telling where the other guys were or how long it would take them to get to the construction site.
"Ok great. I'll keep trying to get ahold of the guys. We'll meet you there. And hey, be careful. Just check it out. Don't do anything else until we get there."
Normally Raven would have responded with some sort of sarcastic quip, but she glanced at Kori who had a hand on her abdomen and was looking back at her with worry in her eyes.
"We'll be careful," Raven promised.
Garfield Mark Logan was not a criminal. But the amount of traffic laws he broke getting back to the tower would have qualified him for a change in that status.
The only thing that saved him from getting pulled over was that he was driving the T-Car. No cop in the city was stupid enough to try and pull the T-Car over.
Except that he was going too fast for them to identify it as the T-Car...
Okay, make that two things that saved him.
Gar couldn't think. The only thing he could focus on was getting back to the tower and finding Raven.
He knew her. He knew how she thought. He knew her first instinct would be to run.
She was the bravest person he knew who could face down monsters, aliens, and supervillains with no problem, but was terrified of her own heart.
At the first sign of emotional turmoil (her own of course) she bailed.
The last time she liked somebody she spent three days in the woods hiding from her feelings.
When the relationship with that same guy went south she took off for Morrocco to visit the world's oldest library. She'd been gone a month and the Beast had given Gar hell over it.
He gave him hell over the whole situation really, but having her half a world away was unacceptable for the Beast.
After the whole Malchior debacle, she had spent two weeks in Washington D.C. visiting the Library of Congress which was apparently the world's largest library. That experience with the Beast had been a nightmare too.
The Beast growled inside of Gar's head, urging him to move faster.
Gar snarled in response. He knew he was under a time constraint. He knew had to get back and find her before she could teleport away. Who knows how far she'd go this time or how long she would be gone.
'Raven...' Gar thought wistfully. 'Please don't be gone, please, please, please...'
There were no words to describe Raven. For Gar she was indescribable. No, it wasn't that there were no words, it was that there were too many. She was smart, beautiful, kind, strong... but the only word that mattered to him that described her was his.
His Raven.
He had never dared to dream, to hope, to imagine... he had never dared to think that she might someday be his.
That she could care for him in that way.
A lot of people thought that his recent playboy streak had been about Terra. All of the guys from the various Titan teams had confronted him about it. Most of them were subtle, bringing it up in a casual "everyone talk about their love lives" way. A few had been direct. Cyborg and Nightwing had been concerned. For different reasons and in different ways, but they had addressed it without any qualms about sparing his feelings. They knew each other too well for that. All of them had assumed that Terra had been the reason.
The real reason had been Raven.
He had been able to accept that she would never want him, never see him as anything more than a teammate and friend. But his beast hadn't been as accepting. There had been weeks when it had been impossible to do anything other than work out in the gym or go for a run in the woods. Weeks where the only thing he could hear in his head was the Beast's roar of outrage and demands for his mate.
Eventually, after destroying the gym countless times and missing multiple calls because he was in the woods Nightwing had had enough. He had told Gar to get it together and get it under control or he was off the team. At first, Gar had thought Dick harsh, but now he could see that Dick had only been trying to help. And help it had. Thanks to Dick's little "move it or lose it" speech, Gar had found another outlet for the Beast to decompress. That outlet being countless women.
But now that he knew it was possible to have more with Raven, no other woman would be enough, not even to let off some steam. Raven was it. She was everything to him. And the thought that he might lose her before he could even talk to her...
He swallowed a large knot that had formed in his throat. He couldn't bear the thought.
He knew that this was it. If her relationship with him went up in smoke, then so did her relationship with the rest of the team. She couldn't do her job if their relationships were compromised, so she would leave for good. That was even if she came back from her initial "runaway" episode.
This was it, Gar knew it. He was the ball game.
'If she is gone, then we will find her. We will make it our mission to track her down and bring her home.'
The Beast being reassuring for once didn't comfort Gar, it only made him more anxious.
He was already pushing 90 mph, but he floored it anyway. Cyborg would just have to get over the rough treatment of his "baby".
When he finally got back to the tower, he nearly hit two poles and Dick's motorcycle in his rush to park. Then he tore through the tower at breakneck speed tracking Raven's scent. Still not going fast enough, he changed into a leopard and kept going without missing a beat.
He checked Raven's room, but even with the door closed he could tell she wasn't there. From the strength of her scent, he could tell that he had just missed her.
He headed for the common room, praying that she was there.
He came careening around a corner and nearly body-slammed Dick.
"Whoa... easy there Gar. What's the rush?"
Gar switched back to his human form, out of breath.
"Have you seen Raven?" He panted. Blood rushed through his veins, his heart beating wildly in his chest. He needed to find her, and he needed to find her soon, even if it was only so that he could calm down.
Dick looked at him confused.
"Raven? Isn't she supposed to be with you?"
Gar's panic began to steadily rise even higher. Blood pounded in his ears and the Beast's roaring made his head throb. If she hadn't gone to Dick to give him a heads up then she probably wasn't planning on coming back.
"So you haven't seen her?"
Dick wasn't even paying attention.
"Yeah, because I distinctly remember telling her to take you with her..."
Gar lost what little patience he had left.
"Oh for the love of God! Dick have you seen Raven!" He shouted.
Looking surprised and shaken at his teammate's unexpected outburst, Dick shook his head.
"Not since this morning. Sorry."
Gar growled and turned around. He could tell by now that she wasn't in the tower, her scent was getting weaker by the minute. He needed to search her room, see if she had taken anything, and if so what. He also needed to look for any clues as to where she might be headed.
Dick followed him, utterly confused.
"What happened? Did Kori's matchmaking attempt go south?"
Gar stopped dead in his tracks, causing Dick to run into him. Gar turned to face the slightly shorter man, a dark look in his eye. The amused smirk Dick had been wearing slowly melted at the dark expression on his green teammate's face. He seemed to finally realize just how serious the situation was.
"Kori knew?"
"Knew...?" Dick asked cautiously.
"That Raven has feelings for me."
Dick looked so shocked he probably could have been knocked over with a feather. Gar rolled his eyes and kept walking. Talking to the clearly unknowledgeable and oblivious leader would do him no good right now.
"Wait, she what?" Dick hurried to catch up with the green man's quick pace.
"She has feelings for me and Kori knew about it." Gar summed up. Kori's behavior toward them recently was starting to make sense.
"Okay first of all, if that's true, don't be mad at Kori. She probably didn't tell you because she was protecting Raven's secret as part of "girl code" or whatever." Dick paused as they reached Raven's door. As a courtesy Gar knocked. He knew she wasn't in there, but going in without her knowledge and permission was an extreme invasion of privacy and he wanted to be able to tell her when he saw her again because he would be seeing her again, that he at least had the decency to knock.
"Second of all?" Gar asked as he punched in the override code to Raven's room.
"Second of all, speaking of Kori, have you seen her today? I haven't seen her all day and last night she was acting kind of weird."
The door slid back and Gar entered the dark room. Her scent of lavender, sage, and a hint of brimstone was overwhelming in a good way. It washed over him like a cool soothing balm on his raw nerves.
Taking several deep breaths, he let her scent wash over him and calm him down. Him and the Beast.
Gar looked around her room, looking for any clues. He could tell her powers had gotten out of hand. Her room had been hastily and absentmindedly cleaned. Or half cleaned. Gar could tell that she had started, but something must have interrupted her.
Most of her books were on the floor, there were feathers everywhere, several of her knick-knacks lay in broken pieces across the floor, and her mirrors were cracked. Most of the debris from the knick-knacks and what he guessed had been pillows had been gathered into piles, ready to be picked up and thrown away. New pillows had been placed on her bed, though they had not been put into new pillowcases. Some books had been put back on the shelves, but they lay in messy stacks as though they had been set there without a second thought.
As he looked around, something on the bed caught his attention.
Frowning, he walked over to see what it was. It only took two more steps into the room for him to realize what it was.
A small, gray duffle bag sat on Raven's bed, half packed with clothes.
Gar's heart sank to his stomach.
She was leaving. Raven was leaving because of him.
The Beast growled.
'She has not left yet. Her bag is still here, her room is still a mess. There is still hope of finding and stopping her.'
'Ok, you being reassuring, not making this any easier.'
'Would you prefer I scream and roar and hiss and fight until she is found?'
'No...'
'Then reassuring is what you get. My understanding is that my throwing "temper tantrums" as you call them, gives you a headache. That would make finding Raven more difficult and seeing how Raven is OUR mate, it is within both of our interests to find her and prevent her from leaving. So for once our goals are aligned, therefore you receive calm reassurance from me.'
'Perfect...' Gar thought sarcastically.
Suddenly a new concern popped into his head. What had happened that had stopped Raven mid-packing? Mid cleaning? Had someone attacked the tower? Had she been taken?
Panic began to rise in him as one worst-case scenario after another filled his head, each one worse than the last. Finally, the Beast interrupted his panicked thoughts.
'Calm down. Look around. Think it through.' The Beast calmly instructed.
Gar took a deep breath and did as the Beast suggested. He did not like listening to his own inner demon, especially when that demon was right, but as the Beast already said, in this their intentions were the same. To find and bring home Raven safe and sound and keep her from running away.
He looked around the room.
'Ok, so other than the mess that was caused by Raven's powers there doesn't seem to be anything out of place. No sign of a struggle. No sign of forced entry. The alarms didn't go off which means that the tower wasn't attacked. We would have been notified by Cyborg's system. The door was locked with her code which means she was the last one to close and lock the door.'
'Which means?'
'Which means she wasn't taken or attacked.' Gar concluded.
"Holy..."
Gar jumped, startled by Dick's surprised statement. In all of his panic, he had forgotten that the team leader was there.
"What happened in here?" Dick asked.
"Raven's powers must have gotten out of hand."
Dick frowned.
"That hasn't happened in a long time. I wonder what..." For a moment he was quiet as he tried to figure out what could have possibly upset Raven enough to destroy her room. Then it seemed to click. Gar winced as Dick's head snapped up and his signature masked glare landed on Gar.
Dick opened his mouth to start the lecture that Gar knew was coming but before he could say anything their communicators beeped.
'Saved by the Cy...' Gar thought as he flipped open his communicator.
"This isn't over," Dick muttered quietly.
"What's up Tinman?" Gar asked as he avoided looking at Dick.
"Finally! Thank god! Where have you two been?"
"At the tower," Gar responded, confused.
"What's the problem, Cyborg?" Nightwing asked in leader mode.
"We got a report of someone loitering in a construction site downtown. The description given matches a description given in the files Batman sent over. I'm on my way there now, and so are the girls."
"The girls?" Gar tried not to sound too eager or excited, but his heart was racing a thousand miles a minute.
She was still here. He would get to see her and talk to her. Everything was going to work out fine.
"Yeah, I was able to get ahold of them first. The thing is there's some sort of problem with the communicators. It took me 15 minutes to get ahold of them and Raven said that their communicators never beeped. That was over 5 minutes ago and I'm assuming that this is the first time y'all's have beeped?"
Changeling and Nightwing shared a dark look. If there was a problem with their communicators then they had huge problems.
"Cyborg, you said that the girls are on their way?" Nightwing asked.
"Yeah, they should be there soon. I told them to be careful and not to do anything until we got there."
Nightwing nodded.
"Good. We'll meet you there. Oh, and Cyborg, Du'esh clee sig'nog."
Cyborg nodded indicating that he understood. Gar understood too. It was a code phrase in Tamerainian that they used whenever they thought that they might be compromised. They had set it up after their encounter with The Brotherhood of Evil.
Nightwing had had Starfire teach all of them Tamerainian after Pairs, just in case something like one of their communicators was compromised ever happened again. Learning the alien language had been easier for some than for others. Cyborg, who had an automatic language processor and already knew the basics, had become fluent in no time. Raven who knew several complex ancient and dead languages from other dimensions and planets, did not take long to pick it up either. Nightwing who already spoke several languages and also had private tutoring help from his girlfriend learned pretty quickly as well, though he was not considered fluent. Gar had struggled with learning the language the most. Even with help from Starfire, Raven, and Cyborg, and his fluency in Swahili, he still could only understand and speak certain words and phrases. Luckily that was enough for him to understand the code system Nightwing had set up.
Nightwing had also set up the code phrases on the off chance they were ever compromised on Tameran. In English, the phrase translated to "scrub and burn". It meant they were to destroy and ditch their communicators and meet at a pre-determined location. Since they did not have a pre-determined meet-up point they would just meet at the construction site.
Gar shook his head. He needed to focus on the current situation.
"Nightwing and Changeling out." Nightwing signed off.
The two men exchanged another dark look before they hit the self-destruct buttons on their communicators. A high-pitched beeping noise began to emanate from the devices as Changeling took both communicators and walked over to Raven's window. He opened the window and tossed them out and into the bay below.
"Come on, we need to find the girls." Nightwing turned and led the way out of Raven's room.