It wasn't like Hiccup was trying to starve himself.
No, really. He wasn't. Not intentionally, anyway. But when you're growing up in a village at war with dragons, with rapidly dwindling food rations, and you're not exactly the shining example of what it means to be viking warrior, the idea of eating more than you deserve just seems… unappealing.
It just sort of made logical sense, in his eyes. Even if he were to eat more, that wouldn't change the fact that he'd always be a glorified talking fishbone- and gods knows he'd tried at least once; trying to build up a foundation for muscle when he was seven, only to end up barfing in Spitelout's shoes when he ate too much too quickly.
Food became even less appealing after that.
So. If eating more just proved to be a waste of rations, when there were vikings out there who'd evidently need more than he did, then not eating much just seemed like the most logical course of action.
And for the longest time, that was just that. And nobody paid any mind- well, more mind than usual- that the skinny boy with no muscle continued being just that.
That was until they did.
It'd been just a few hours since he woke up after the battle with the Red Death. Not quite the evening just yet, but something close to it, when the festivities had died down, and the rush and thrill of the dragon race he'd had with his- were they friends now? Teammates? Well, the other teenagers, was beginning to wear off.
In all honesty, Hiccup just kind of wanted to head back home and collapse back in bed with Toothless, and try not to think about the incoming dread of now needing to re-learn how to walk with the metal leg.
Unfortunately, fate- well, more specifically, Gobber, had other plans.
"Oh, no, ye' don't," said Gobber as he stubbornly stood in front of the door home, blocking entry. The blacksmith crossed his arm-and-hook as Hiccup sighed exasperatedly, "It's nattmal soon. Ye' need to eat, 'specially after the coma ye' just had."
Eugh.
"Do I have to?" Hiccup grumbled, "I'm- I'm fine, I just want to hang out with Toothless."
"Uh-huh," his mentor seemed undeterred, narrowing his eyes further. He looked around, checking that no-one else but he and Toothless were near, then pointed his hook a little accusingly, "Mind tellin' me why I could feel ye' ribs when ye' was sleepin', then?"
Hiccup froze.
"Oh, uh, aha-ha-ha, you…" Aaaand now Toothless was also glaring at him suspiciously. Great, "You- you saw that, huh? Uh…"
"We needed ta' see if ye' had any extra injuries," Gobber explained, much to his dismay, "Hiccup, put away ye' smart mouth for a moment. Were ye' avoiding eatin', preparin' for that exam with tha' nightmare?"
Something in Hiccup's heart squirmed at the sight of just how sad Gobber looked for him. He should've guessed Gobber would've caught on, considering he didn't really eat at that campfire they had when Gobber was telling the story of how he lost his limbs for the hundredth time. It's not exactly easy to avoid people when you're being dragged along for class.
He considered just going along with his mentor's hypothesis, but then Toothless warbled worriedly with those big eyes, and something in Hiccup's resolve broke. He was a terrible liar, anyways.
"Well," Hiccup laughed nervously, "Not- not more than I usually do?"
His attempt at downplaying it with a diplomatic smile hadn't worked, as Toothless only warbled louder, nudging at his side concernedly.
"Oh, Hiccup," Gobber started- no, not the pity, anything but the pity. He didn't want more grovelling-at-his-feet apologies, especially not from the guy who was one of the nicest to him-
"I-I-I-It's not because of you guys!" the boy hurried, "Honestly! I just… didn't really feel like eating a whole lot. A-a-and the village was always low on rations, anyway, I didn't want to take from everyone else's meals, and I still ate enough to stay alive anyway, so-"
"Lad, it's not 'bout eatin' just enough to stay alive," the man groaned, interrupting Hiccup before he could ramble, "Yeesh, no wonder ye' the size of a toothpick, if ye' not been eating."
"Ruff, Tuff, and Astrid are the same size as me," Hiccup retorted, pouting.
"And yet they can lift an axe, while you can't," Gobber argued back. His apprentice's mouth shut, and Gobber sighed, "Come on, lad. At least eat a little more this week; ye' lost a fair bit o' blood with that leg, and ye' need the energy if ye' wanna recover faster."
"But-"
"There's more than 'nough ta' go 'round," Gobber cut in again, once again snapping whatever retort Hiccup had shut, "the war's over, Hiccup. Yer' fine. Honestly, we'll need the extra mouths after ye' inevitably teach folks ta' use their beasts for fishin'."
"Well, I mean," Hiccup started, "I'll have to draw up drafts for how the netting material would hold up against the claws, and then I'd have to test prototypes- "
Gobber glared.
"…Fine," Hiccup conceded.
And so, that was the story of how one Gobber the Belch dragged a stubborn Hiccup Horrendous Haddock The Third and his dragon to sit with the rest of the village in the Great Hall, eyeing him carefully to make sure he actually ate something instead of listlessly picking at the food with his fork.
It wasn't as easy when you weren't being actively nagged.
There wasn't anything special about this day, really. In fact, it had been exceptionally boring. Just the usual rounds of training with the gang at the newly-dubbed Dragon Academy, with no evil schemes by the Outcasts or riots riled up by Mildew to count. The most exciting thing that happened today was the usual dragon race with his friends, but Toothless was getting tired, and it was about time for a break, anyway.
And so, here Hiccup sat, in the middle of his hut, predictably picking listlessly at the steamed mutton his Dad left him with his fork, while Toothless gorged himself on a barrel full of strangely-stinkier-than-usual raw fish.
The fish smell was gross. Even though he wasn't the one stuffing his face full of it, the scent that wafted over made his stomach churn uncomfortably, as though telling him the plate full of very-much-not-raw-fish mutton sitting in front of him was equally as poisonous to his human physique.
He really didn't feel like eating.
But Dad made it for him; and he didn't want to waste the food.
Great, the back of his mind mused, first he felt guilty about eating too much, and now he was feeling guilty about not eating. Absolutely fantastic. Not.
He had to do something. Dad would be back from his chief duties soon, and if he saw that Hiccup still hadn't eaten the food, he was going to ask questions, and it'd become a whole thing, and- eugh.
"Hey, bud?" Hiccup spoke up after a while. Toothless looked up from the barrel, slurping off the crumbs of fish from his fangs, "Craving any mutton, lately?"
Toothless looked down at the food, then back at Hiccup. The Night Fury's deadpan expression told him what he thought of that idea.
"Well, it was worth a shot," Hiccup sighed, leaning back on the couch, "It's just- it's a lot of food."
The dragon tilted his head to the side, as if pondering what to do. Then, suddenly, Toothless approached the table to carefully lick off half of the plate, leaving the other half untouched. Hiccup blinked at the sight, surprised, until Toothless nudged the plate back towards Hiccup, now with a considerably smaller, though still present, amount of food.
The message was clear.
"Just eat what I can, huh?" Hiccup rubbed the Night Fury's scales gratefully, picking up the fork yet again, "Thanks, Toothless."
Baby steps. A small something was better than nothing, he supposed.
As long as it was something.
"You're getting pretty strong," Astrid commented one morning, while they were training.
Snotlout snorted, "He is?"
His cousin was equally as baffled, "I am?"
"I mean, yeah," She ignored Snotlout's comment, casually dodging Hiccup's crossbow-shield with a roll, then aiming with her axe, which he blocked with said shield, "Look at you now! You could barely hold a shield before."
Hiccup tried not to make his scoff sound too dismissive, "Well, I did make it light-weighted and small. It's just wood and Gronckle Iron, Astrid. I'm not doing push-ups with giant boulders."
"Sure, but you also hid a whole crossbow in there," she continued, ducking under another arrow. Instead of just attacking again, though, she instead retreated to the far opposite side of the arena, and did something almost completely unexpected.
"Hiccup, catch!" She threw her axe.
"Wha- wait!" Hiccup scrambled to position himself as the axe flew in an almost graceful arc across the arena; somehow barely rotating, like she'd managed to toss it in such a precise manner that only the blunt end was coming towards him.
He caught the weapon by the neck of the handle, breathing heavily; and only wobbled on his feet a little.
"Astrid, what the Helheim was that?!" he panted, more in shock than mad. Toothless growled his dissent for him.
"See!" she praised, excitedly, before coming over to retrieve her axe, "You're building actual muscle. Reflexes, too."
"Woah, I see it," Ruffnut agreed, leaning in, "Man, what happened to scrawny little Hiccy? You couldn't even throw a bucket right, before."
"Oh! Maybe he's secretly an Outcast spy!" suggested Tuffnut, tapping Hiccup's forehead with his finger as though to inspect if his skull was hollow, "Who art thou and what have you done with little Hiccy?!"
"Guys- in case you haven't noticed, I'm still scrawny," Hiccup shoved them off from crowding around him with his shield.
"Still, you've gotta admit, there's an improvement," Astrid pointed out.
"I mean-" He didn't really know why he was blushing, now, "I-I guess I've been eating a little more? But it's probably just because of all the stuff with Alvin and Dagur-"
"Hiccup, that's awesome!" She punched his shoulder, ow, eyes gleaming with pride, "About time you ate more than two bites of fish in a week."
He couldn't help but roll his eyes at that, "Oh, come on, that's exaggerating." It barely was.
"You should be proud, Hiccup," Her voice was less teasing, now. More soft and sincere, "You're doing great."
And now when Hiccup blushed, he knew why.
"Thanks, Astrid," he smiled back.
His hair was getting longer. More full; less like a pitiful, thin mop that kept falling out in bits and pieces everywhere, and more like a messy mane that wouldn't stop growing and now needed to be braided so it didn't end up blowing in his face when they were flying.
That was new.
It'd been a long day. A long several days, actually. They'd just managed to finish all the construction, in setting up something resembling a home on what they now called Dragon's Edge, scouting the perimeter, building huts and stables, and herding boars for the twins' pit, but it was finally, finally over.
Hiccup basically flopped onto the mattress he'd got for his hut, exhausted beyond belief.
But while he was tired, there was... something else, there, too. Something he couldn't exactly place. It was some sort of discomfort, but it wasn't just his exhaustion, nor was it the leg again.
Then, his stomach made a quiet warble-groan-sound.
Oh. He was hungry. Huh. Come to think of it, when was the last time he and the gang ate? It had to have been since... early this morning. And the sun had already set by now. Judging by Toothless' purring, the Night Fury was also craving for food.
"Yeah, I hear you, bud," Hiccup nodded, already mounting the dragon's saddle. His metal leg locked into the pedal with a click, "Let's get something to eat at the clubhouse."
Meals at Dragon's Edge were a surprisingly warm affair. Mostly prepared by Fishlegs, and sometimes Heather, because Odin knows they weren't going to trust anyone else around with the kitchen. It was always a nice way to unwind after all the chaos in their daily lives. Sometimes, Hiccup wished the twins could stay still long enough for him to draw the scene, so they could have these moments in some form forever, but alas.
For now, he was content on just munching on his stick of bread, watching with amusement as Snotlout made another empty threat to rotisserie Tuffnut's Chicken. He could intervene later.
Berk's gold was gone and it was all his fault.
Once again, the village was being affected by a war, and it wouldn't be long before they'd likely have to resort to rationing food again, because they didn't have anything to trade.
Hiccup felt sick. If only he didn't have the stupid idea to borrow Berk's gold for the auction- and now Dad was going to be so mad, and who knows what Viggo was going to do with an entire island's worth of gold, and maybe he shouldn't have left Berk in the first place to go chase some stupid dragons and get involved with fighting the Dragon Hunters, and-
Stop. Inhale, exhale.
Getting stuck in his thoughts over what could've been wasn't going to do anything. He needed to figure out what to do next. He needed to figure out how to help.
That didn't make the guilt go away, though.
He didn't eat that night. He didn't deserve it, anyway.
"Hiccup, ye' alright?" Stoick asked. They'd just returned to Berk after the fiasco with the bounty, the riders electing to stay on Berk for a while longer to catch up with their families before going back to the Edge. Now, they were currently back in Stoick's hut, having landed only an hour ago.
"You're going to have to be a bit more specific," Hiccup replied, dryly, sprawled on the couch like a starfish.
"I mean have ye' had anythin'," his father huffed in exasperation, "I don't suppose those scoundrels ever fed ya' anything, so excited about tha' gold, did they?"
Oh, he really didn't want to do this right now.
"Not… really?" Hiccup managed to shrug, still laying on the couch, "Honestly, I kind of just forgot about food."
"Hiccup."
"Dad, it's fine," He failed to defend, "I wasn't really in the mood to eat, anyway."
Stoick raised an eyebrow.
"That's it," He pushed open the door, "Up you get. Ye' comin' with me to the Hall."
Hiccup squirmed, turning to now lay face-up, "Do I have to?"
"Yes, you have to," His father insisted.
And so, with a non-zero amount of deja-vu, that was the tale of how one Stoick Haddock dragged a stubborn Hiccup Horrendous Haddock The Third with him to the Great Hall to eat. A part of him felt a tad mortified about the fact that he'd fallen back into old habits and thought patterns.
Another part of him was just grateful his Dad managed to convince him to have something.
"Since when do you pack snacks?" Astrid wondered aloud, watching as Hiccup took out a pouch of hazelnuts from somewhere in his armour to eat with one hand, while he sketched the unexplored area in front of them with the other. Behind them, Stormfly and Toothless were playing tug-of-war with a tree log.
"Eh, well, I started getting hungry while exploring farther places for the map," He explained offhandedly, "But it always takes too long to fly back home, so..."
"Huh," Astrid hummed. Then held out her hand, "Can I have some?"
"Yeah, sure," He nudged the hazelnut pouch towards her, as he continued to draw, "Help yourself, milady."
"Thanks!"