When they first started dating, Hinata went through gradual transformations.
"You have really pretty eyes." He said one afternoon, on the designated (and unofficial) senior skip day. She was adamant about not ruining her perfect attendance and he was receptive, but made her promise in return to be his date for a party that night to make up for the loss day off.
He tucked her overgrown bangs behind her ears, his touch only intensifying the burning feeling. Before she could respond, he said "You shouldn't cover your face as much. I like seeing you." He said it with the biggest grin, she was in awe of how bright he was. It made her feel so special and lucky to be on the receiving end of his affection. She never thought he would have reciprocated her feelings and here he was, as her boyfriend. Her first.
When Naruto mentioned a party, she panicked. She reached out to Ino and her now new friend, Sakura for advice. "You just have to dress comfortably." Ino shrugged, as she started to draw the sharpest eyeliner on her eyes. Easier said than done when she had such an athletic build and years of makeup practice. Ino was a track star queen and was accustomed to the attention her title came with.
"I'll do your makeup! I'm done with mine." Sakura said as she finished her look with some setting spray. "Let's undo this first, though." She pulled Hinata's hair out of the low braid she had and started to spray at her ends, running a brush through each knot and curl with intensity and focus.
Hinata winced and could hear the sizzling of the curling iron off the counter. Despite having Hanabi and her cousin Neji with her growing up, she couldn't recall ever experiencing girlhood in such an intimate way before. She only saw friendships like this on television. It was comforting how the music from Sakura's radio played, clothes scattering across Sakura's bed for outfits to decide, an orange candle burning on her desk. She's lost in her thoughts until she can smell the faint scent of a cigarette.
"I'll crack your window." Ino mumbles sheepishly as she walks to the other side of the room, exhaling the smoke from her vice.
"I'm so happy you're with Naruto." Sakura beamed as she rubbed the light product into her hair. The pinkette switched to the black eyeliner pencil in her hands. "Stay still, close your eyes." Complying, Hinata was silent for what felt like thirty minutes but was likely closer to ten.
She felt the soft movement of the pencil over her eyelids followed by the brushes - she guessed an eyeshadow. "Open for a sec." She did and was greeted with the pencil on her waterlines, Sakura using her index finger to blend the color. "You'll see." She smiled. She then grabbed a tube of mascara - "Look up, Hina" - and used an eyelash curler to lift.
"What are you wearing?" She asked.
"I don't-"
Ino pops back up, smelling like smoke and a neat blend of vanilla body mist. "This." She gestures, holding what she couldn't identify as anything other than a strapless dress.
"I'm not sure-"
"Honey, you're wearing it. You'll fill in where I couldn't." Sakura joked, pressing blush onto her cheeks. "I don't think you need anything else except a cute lipstick. Ino, what color should I pick?"
Hinata squirmed under Ino's gaze. "Red." She felt the coolness of the lipstick run across her lips and fought back the urge to lick them.
Sakura stepped back, warned her to close her eyes then sprayed the mist on her face to set it all in. Blinking, Hinata was given the dress and some boots. "Put this on and I think we're done. Hurry, we need the final look!"
Hinata stepped out of the hallway bathroom, desperately pulling the dress down. It was stuck around her thighs, the end slowly uncurling upward. She felt the blood rush to her face when she came back to her friends.
"You look so hot!" They both crooned, hands on their faces.
"Please don't take it off." Ino pleaded.
"Yeah, don't let our hard work go to waste. Naruto will love it."
She half wobbled over to the mirror and admired Ino and Sakura's work - she had never seen herself beyond with her usual occasional mascara. The curls in her mane were falling over her shoulders loosely, and she was grateful. The dress was a dark blue minidress, hugging her in places she never realized clothes could do. She scratched her cheek, trying to hold in her tears.
"I love it - I'm-" Hinata took a breath. "I'm just nervous, I promise!"
"Trust me, you look amazing, Hina." Ino said as she wrapped her arms around Hinata's shoulders from behind. They were all similarly styled except Sakura and Ino were pros in their heels.
If it meant her boyfriend would like it, she trusted them. She'd swallow her shyness and save it for another time.
Without her older cousin and father present, Hinata gave in to the delights of underaged drinking. She walked with her friends arms linked to the party off a light buzz. She was by far the most inexperienced, but let loose and allowed herself to just laugh and follow Sakura and Ino.
The cool, summer evening breeze was nothing courtesy of the liquor she could still taste on her tongue. She wanted to savor it. As they approached the Nara residence, she suddenly felt her friends let go and run, likely to their respective partners. Hinata headed for the table, trying to find another drink to hold between her hands. It was either an object or she would pick at the skin around her cuticles, the tick that replaced her previous stutters.
The music is loud, and not her favorite. She thinks having more alcohol will loosen her up more, and that she will suppress the nerves in her throat at Naruto's reaction. This was all for him, after all. Every decision from the lipstick to the thin gold necklace were ways to impress her outgoing, popular boyfriend. She smiles at the amateur bartender and takes the red solo cup filled with rum and coke and downs it, ignoring the harsh smell and bitter aftertaste.
She asks for another.
The lights are a blur of blue and pink, flashing along the endless bodies of seniors from her class. She kept to herself so much it didn't resonate with her until now that she was in a sea of so many people she didn't have a chance to meet and befriend. She brings the cup to her mouth and starts taking small sips, letting her legs take her around the unfamiliar house.
She feels her arm getting tugged and feels the familiar warmth and smell of a familiar blond. He's blurry, but he's real. She can't hide the smile and feels him engulf her in a sloppy hug, tightening around her waist.
"You look amazing." He murmurs in her ears, tangling his fingers through her hair. She feels like she could fly at any moment. The taste of sake tickles her nose and pretty soon his hands are holding her head in place for a kiss. He pulls away and she misses it instantly. "We're playing a game. Come with me."
He pulls her through the crowd to the foyer where it's quieter, but not by much. The bass is felt within the walls and the nights are so dim she can hardly see the dark floors. She feels the dress rise with every step but ignores the embarrassment she undoubtedly feels. When they come to his spot, she eventually confirms Sakura, Ino, Shikamaru, Kiba, Temari, and Sasuke are in attendance.
She stumbles and is biting her lower lip as the compliments about her appearance swallow her. She avoids eye contact with the lingering eyes and mumbles a soft "Thank you".
"We're spinning the bottle." Naruto smiles. "But it's cool, we're all friends. It's just to have fun."
She doesn't know how to feel about Naruto kissing others, and wants to ignore the thoughts in the back of her head wondering if he has been doing this since he asked her out. She chooses to believe he hasn't and that he's asking for permission. She nods and smiles, accepting the inevitable. She drinks more out of her cup.
"Since Hina just came, maybe we should let her spin since we already went." Sakura smiles widely, excited to bring the Hyuuga out of her shell.
Hinata can't remember the last time she said something out loud. She's lost in the now nerves of kissing someone that wasn't Naruto. She leans in to grab the bottle, hoping her dress stays in place and it lands on her boyfriend.
"Whoever it lands on, you gotta go to the shed out back for five minutes." Kiba states loudly, as if reiterating the rules.
Hinata hesitantly spins the bottle, readjusting her sitting on my legs next to Naruto. She's the only one focused on the bottle and where it lands while everyone else mingles and shares shots.
"Here Hinata," Temari stretches her arm out to give her a small glass filled to the brim. "Welcome to the club." She grins, and Hinata is too lost to fully capture the extent of what she's silently agreed to.
The bottle slows down and points to Sasuke.
They're in the closet, sitting on the ground on the opposite walls of the cramped closet. She's covering her legs with her arms but otherwise feels weightless, as if shedding her nerves and appreciating how dark and secluded the shed was.
"We don't have to do this if you don't want to." He eventually says. She isn't sure how long she's been quiet but nods along, biting her lower lip. She's never really spoken to Sasuke, and to find out this would be the first opportunity without their friends around was not exactly the ideal circumstance.
"Naruto said he's done this before…did he kiss someone already?" She asks. Despite the smile on her face she's internally trying to repair the clenching of her heart. She's faking it and is sure he can see through it.
"He did." Sasuke confirms.
"Then…I'll do it." She nods slowly, trying to slow down her increasing heartbeat. He gets up and stretches his arm to help her up. She thinks this will make up for Naruto's previously undisclosed infidelity. Though, since she consented to playing (not that she had much of a choice..), this didn't count. Peer pressure and her impaired reasoning are the culprits but it's too late to hide from it. She takes him in and wonders if she is only now aware that he's handsome. She picks at her nail, still staring at him.
"Does doing this not bother you?" She's whispering now, because he's now in front of her, leaning down and his bangs are gently caressing her cheeks. She wants to know that this is okay, that this is normal, because in this moment it felt nothing like the sort. She wanted to be with her boyfriend, not her friend's. She couldn't compute how this is fun. It didn't seem like it.
"It's not supposed to." He says, gently brushing her hair off her cheeks. He grabs her chin and makes her meet his gaze. She notes how determined he looks, so focused on her. His eyes are so dark, and it didn't help that the only light in the shed was the moonlight from the small window behind him.
"Can I?" He asks again, and she figures her hesitancy is throwing him off. She nods slowly, ignoring the way her ribcage is feeling rattled by her overworked heart. She closes her eyes and just feels the softness of his lips, ones she had never imagined meeting. Her own part and he takes the given opportunity to bring his tongue to entwine with hers.
He tastes like whiskey. Smokey, smooth. She feels her knees buckle, and he gradually moves his arms to rest at her hips. She doesn't care about her dress anymore. She can feel herself losing it, her focus on their dancing tongues. Her hands crawl to his hair and she brings his face closer, ignoring the red flags sober Hinata would have never done.
She feels guilty that she's enjoying this, but she reasons that she's allowed to embrace this affection this one time if it meant Naruto had done this already and at his apparent insistence. She pretends for a moment she's with him, but is brought back to the dark haired Uchiha who is giving her an intensity she has never felt with her own partner. Naruto has never kissed her like this.
They part because his mouth moves to her neck. She believes it's just hormones, it's nothing more than the given contact. She could be anyone and he would do this. Even if her mouth betrayed her and she couldn't hold the whimper, this passion was meaningless. This wasn't reserved only for her, of course he has done this before. He's a natural with plenty of practice from his girlfriend.
"This looks better on you," He whispers sensually, coming back to her mouth with a more intense kiss than before. She's too lost in the daze of the moment. She can feel him raise her against the wall, holding her by her thigh. She latches it lazily around him, keeping him close.
He recognized the dress when Naruto brought the shy Hyuuga, and did not imagine he'd be the lucky one to take her outside. He ignored Sakura's furrowed brow when his eyes stayed on her when she joined the group huddled together. He couldn't control his line of vision when she bent to spin the bottle either, considering her dress compressed her ample chest in a way it never did for Sakura.
So when it landed on him, he feigned indifference as best he could. He didn't want to seem too excited, and certainly for the sensitive Sakura. He was sure he'd have to reassure her later or whenever she wanted to cause a fight. Those were frequent, but this would be the only fight he wouldn't give a shit to go through. This felt worth it.
"Have fun!" Naruto says, releasing his girlfriend's hand as she stood up. Sasuke didn't want to play this game but Sakura insisted, and he couldn't understand why Naruto would be so cool with letting his hot girlfriend who was insanely obsessed with him do it. He sure as shit would not if Hinata was his. Especially dressed like that.
But behind closed doors, he could give in to what he's always been curious about. The faint scent of her floral shampoo in her hair, her mouth, even with the alcohol scent was still so sweet. He didn't know how hungry he was for a taste but was grateful he could do this with her right now.
She let him hold her and gave the same desire as though it was destined to happen. He knew the knock would come soon to get them to leave, but he wanted to stay where they were. She sucked on his lower lip and he had to restrain the growl he wanted to embrace.
His left hand kept her in place but his right traveled down her exposed back before it rested on her ass. While he could, he squeezed, hearing the squeak from her throat. Proud of the sounds he elicited from her, he lets her go, already prepared for the forceful knock at the door.
She's gasping for air, using her left hand to wipe the saliva the kiss left.
"Teme, time's up! I want my girl back!"
Sasuke looks over at the out of breath girl and mentally captures her disheveled look, the way her eye makeup smudged from their contact. He wants to remember the one time he had to try what he couldn't outside these walls.
He pathetically hopes his actions spoke what he couldn't outright say.
Hinata takes two more shots after she's out the shed. She reasons the alcohol is enough to make her feel better. She doesn't really speak the rest of the evening because her mind is running in so many directions she can't keep up. She accepts the music, the other teens dancing, and focuses the rest of her attention on her boyfriend by her side.
She gets dragged to a small guest room by Naruto. "I'm glad you played." Naruto says in her ear, leaving kisses on her neck. "I hope I'm better." He laughs, cupping her face to kiss her again.
She wanted to feel the fireworks, she wanted to drown in his warmth and find the same feeling she felt in the shed earlier.
Instead, she shivers. She doesn't feel him giving her a fraction of what she felt with his best friend. She ignores her dilemma and returns the kiss, hoping he will meet her the same way Sasuke did.
Hinata is throwing up with Sakura holding her hair up in a makeshift ponytail back at her house a few hours later. At this point, it's just bile. Ino left a glass of water and two aspirins on the sink counter, and Hinata is counting each pink tile on the bathroom wall.
"I think you had a lot of fun tonight." Sakura yawns with a smile. Hinata is trying to control her nausea, ignoring the tears forming in her eyes.
She reaches for the glass and downs it, followed by the pills. "Yes." She says eventually, her throat hoarse. She's of course lying, because she is afraid of her friend hating her. She does not want to elaborate on how kissing Sasuke was.
"I'm glad we took your party virginity." Ino says with a laugh, face freshly washed of her makeup and already dressed in her pajamas. She pats her face with the towel and turns to Hinata, who's still cradling by the toilet in her late night attire.
She loves her friends, and smiles back reassuringly. She ignores the hole in her heart and hopes the feeling goes away tomorrow.
When she's finally under the covers in Sakura's guestroom, she brings her hand to cradle her chin like Sasuke had done. She briefly wonders why she couldn't shake how it felt to be held by him.
"Naruto." Hinata whispers, gently shaking her boyfriend's shoulder. It's two am and he just returned to their apartment. She couldn't sleep, but it was Chouji's birthday, and he insisted he would only go for a beer or two. She had a paper and stayed behind to finish it for her morning deadline.
He groans, gently swatting her arm away. "Later." He mumbles into his pillow. "I'm tired, Hina."
She accepts she has to wait, that he did nothing wrong. She ignores a feminine scent that didn't belong to her. He doesn't wake up and comfort her. He doesn't know.
The next morning, Naruto is making coffee in the kitchen. She walks in, already dressed for the day to drop off her paper. He approaches her in his robe, giving her a morning kiss. "Did you sleep alright?" He asks. "I didn't mean to wake you if I did." He laughs.
She smiles back, embracing his sober state. This is the man she was in love with. Bright, sincere, loving. "You didn't." She swiftly lies. She wants to be honest but can't. If she acknowledged how unsure she felt, it would only create a fight that doesn't need to happen. Three years and here they were, living together, in university together. She was happy.
She was happy.
A/N: I couldn't get this out of my head. These are flashbacks - I just really wanted to bring more of my ship since it's slowbuild lmao. Two songs in particular off Cowboy Carter - specifically, the instrumentals - were in my head when I wrote this for hours. Guess the songs and I update sooner :') Reviews are appreciated! I'll try to update next month - I'm surprised I even had it in me to write this so soon. Last chapter took me months!