Astoria Greengrass always had a greater than average enjoyment of beauty.
She liked it in the regal silhouette of the Greengrass manor against pale blue pre-sunset skies, in the black, grey and glitter swirls up their ceiling-tall marble wall panelling, the black flecked emerald crystal statues that adorned their hallways and walls. Her wardrobe was a sashay of many shades of green, with the occasional girly pinks and contemporary greyscale hues. Their sweets upon the occasions they had them were delicately divine, and she had always wished to impart a bit of this beauty for life and all the ways it could look into every corner and crevice of the world as she journeyed through it.
She had not always a good relationship with her own beauty however.
Her older sister by two years Daphne Greengrass was considered the most beautiful current Greengrass of their generation. Her parents were snobby and haunghty, no doubt a mark of Sacred 28 pureblood demeanor, and Astoria had always felt cast in shadow beside Daphne.
She had never thought herself beautiful, but she could enjoy beauty in other things. That was safer, because there was no risk of comparison to herself.
"Come with me to the enchanted forest?" Astoria asked Daphne when they were 6 and 8.
They were in their entrance hall. The checkered white and black tiles with flecks of marbled grey and cold shiny beneath their feet; their reflections present in the ruddy speckled surface for a few inches deep. The familiar sweep of chill was present in this room as well, and added to it a deep calming effect, to the already majestic Greengrass Manor. The crystal and gold chandeliers above glistened in the midday light that passed through the large bay windows. Through the glass panels of the side door and the front door the leafy green trees could be seen in the distance. The Manor was surrounded by forest and a wheatfield, the eponymous Greengrass wheat whom their father grew, passed down through their family by generations.
There was no enchanted forest, but it had been a fantasy land Astoria wished Daphne would play along with her in.
"No," Daphne looked up from where she was playing with a doll that looked just like her. The same look she wore whenever her friend Pansy Parkinson was around and they didn't want Astoria to play with them. "You're such a baby. I'm done with fairyland or whatever."
Daphne had never quite like Astoria, and Astoria sensed it enough. It meant competition for inheritance, marriage partners, greater status and reputation among the Sacred 28 social circles, their parents' highest esteems.
"It's not fairyland. I was telling mum that the forest outside looks enchanted and there might be a chance of fairies if you believed hard enough. I don't believe it all the time," said Astoria.
"There's no forest. It's just a group of trees that's too small to be an actual forest," Daphne glared at Astoria.
"It is to me. Fine, I'll go and lose myself in the forest cause it's so big to me!" Astoria said.
"I hope you meet something wicked there!" Daphne snapped.
Astoria ran out the side door; fuming. The leaves a vivid mosaic of neon green and yellow beneath her shoes. The side door led to the back where Astoria peeled off to the borders of the wheatfield where the treeline was, dipping inside the thick brown trunks and letting whichever patch of ground was softer, flatter, and allowed tread to dictate where she went. She gathered up some flowers, whatever looked pretty, the most floral looking ones, from the ground and soon found her feet tired and aching for a rest. She had skipped all over the place.
She reached a clearing with a large slanted grey rock in the middle, a sunbeam falling over it, and some bumpy lumps of grass and clover that obscured her sight. Creeping closer, she drew back suddenly, noticing roughly seventeen red-and-white, purple-and-white toadstoal heads drawn in a circle.
She had dropped her flowers; one somehow landing within the mysterious ring. She picked it up and gathered them with shaky hands, already planning her return to the manor when suddenly a tinkling sound was heard.
"Fairies?" Astoria whispered out loud. She had heard of fairies, elves and goblins in her picturebooks except there hadn't been too much on fairies. A few pictures scattered across several books and they were still a mystery to her. Still, she figured they were small fluttery creatures found in the woods among the flowers and the toadstools, they were probably pretty and she wondered what fairyland was like - the place they lived. How cool would it be to go there and see it for real? Or to make friends with the fairies?
The clovers and tussles of grass rustled, pulling together and then withdrawing themselves so that the faintest curve of words could be seen underneath. It looked like some strands had twisted themselves together to form a message. Curious, Astoria pulled them back.
we are the fae
The sentence read. Astoria was able to read by this time.
"Do you live in fairyland?" Astoria asked.
would you like to be a guest
"Yes please!" Astoria cried, tossing the flowers up in the air and watching more of the dark purple and yellow, the white with poison pink streaks, the green and yellow neon bluebells, and many more, glimmer through the air before landing upon the grassy cloverfield beneath.
step inside the ring
Astoria did so.
In the blink of an eye and some pink and white glitter and sparkles, the rest of the world disappeared and she found herself in what looked like a city made of wood, leaves, and glassy palaces of pink and purple tinted glass, built into a garden where the flowers were as large as shrubs and the blades of grass as tall as trees. Fairies, elves, and more wondered about. They looked like Astoria but had wings, either 2 or 4, in light hues of most colours of the rainbow, most had just one colour but some had 2 or 3 all merging into each other. The fairies were dressed in dresses that matched their wings and the elves in various outfits of varying shades of green and brown.
They had cute fuzzy pets, interesting trinkets and foods. It looked amazing.
Astoria returned across the next few months. Fairyland was every bit as exciting as how a young child would imagine it to be. She got to meet the king and queen, go on small adventures where they saved people and animals due to acts of goodwill, sample new foods and drinks she hadn't had before, and had nice fairy friends.
On one of the last days in fairyland though, Astoria told them her final thoughts.
"I can't keep coming back. I told Daphne and she laughed at me and called me crazy. I'm not but I don't want her to think I am so it's not worth the risk. I'm sorry. I love you, but I love being normal more. I'm going to hang out with Daphne in my free time now. Good-bye I guess?"
goodbye goodbye interesting guest
Her fairy friend mindspoke into her head. They didn't need to talk half as much in fairyland as they did in the real world.
"I still believe in you guys though. I'll never believe I made it up out of sheer boredom or anything. I will for the next few years but what happens after...what if I stop believing..." Astoria bit her lip. If one day she really did believe she made it all up then...it was something she was worried about now. It didn't sound very appealing after receiving so much joy for believing in fairies the first time around.
faith can be negotiated
we have had old guests in our fae court where we trialled them upon their faith at different stages of their lives and how much faith they had despite the favours we still gave them
"I know," Astoria said. She knew the fairies would be a little forgiving if memories began to blur with time. They were so used to kids phasing in and out as they believed in them and didn't that it wouldn't be the first time someone had forgotten. Nor was it the worst crime to commit in front of them.
"I guess part of me doesn't want to go back. Even though I want Daphne to like me a lot...I don't like it here you know? Sometimes I just feel like it's unfair. The world is just unfair..."
no one likes unfairness no one likes unfairness no one likes unfairness
tell us of your injustice
Her fae friends chanted their voices inside her head.
"I know it's silly...it's just Daphne is so pretty all the time. No, scratch that! She's beautiful! She's the beautiful sister...I'm the pretty one. I can tell Draco's more drawn to her. They both have the same hair you see, even I admit that. And I'm just...I don't want to be beautiful like her because she's already taken the spot. I like beauty in other stuff though...houses, dresses, food...but even I can't get that all the time because my mother wants me to do lessons and my father says I should be worrying more about the Dark Lord, current politics and how to play politics with the other Sacred 28. I'm always pulled away from my games of designing where I try to make the best castle, in the best area..." Astoria said.
beauty that is not earned beauty that is not earned
no one likes a glitch in the system no one likes a glitch in the system
a hike up the ladder a like up the ladder
"Yeah. Something like that. Yeah Daphne is so beautiful it's almost like a joke," said Astoria.
we feel your injustice we feel your injustice we feel your injustice
Astoria's friends were agreeing with her.
we can comply with your request we can comply with your request we can comply with your request
"You can? How?" Astoria asked.
if you give us something in return if you give us something in return if you give us something in return
"Like what?" Astoria asked. Most of her items had meant little to her because she usually had everything in excess, or at least she felt like she had things in such excess if she were to lose any of her possessions it would not matter very much to her except for the sake of losing something that was once hers, but monetarily, she felt like nothing would be impossible for her parents to buy back...
At such a young age, with little deep experiences nor bonds with her sister yet (not as much as a full lifetime's worth), she could even be half tempted to trade in her sister or something of her sister's for a fraction of what she truly wanted as of now...
magic that is unneeded magic that is unneeded magic that is unneeded
"Oh like...from me?" Astoria held out her palms, frowning. She couldn't do much magic yet. And she wouldn't be able to until she began at Hogwarts. But she had enough vivid memories of accidental magic to know that she could, and she had been looking forward to being a witch at Hogwarts and everything. She'd always imagined she had more than enough magic because she was from a pureblood family and could easily imagine excess magic flying of her going to the fairies. She supposed there was some magic she didn't need right? She was pureblooded, by definition it meant she had more magic to trade and give away...it just made sense to her at that age...
magic you will not need magic you will not need magic you will not need
"Hmm...okay...don't take too much then," said Astoria.
A thorn pricked her finger on her left hand. She jerked it back, yelping in surprise. A look of horror crossed her face as a rivulet of blood ran down her fingertips and halfway down her wrist. When did that rose grow? Had it always been there?
we were going to take your magic after your 17th year as that is when you graduate from the last place you are required to perform magic but since you have requested...we will give you an extra year
after that your magic will fade away slowly by slowly, any residual remaining is accidental
we will give you all the beauty the wizarding and muggle world has to offer for life
Astoria felt like a bat had hit her over the head. The lights were going out, the scenery was getting fuzzy, a mosaic of greens and greys all blurring together. She felt her knees buckle and herself collapse and then...
"NEVER! GO OUT IN THE WOODS AGAIN!" Astoria woke to her mother screeching in her face.
She was in her bed.
Her father was sitting on one of her little kiddy stools in the room, looking quite flustered and serious. An expression of unhappy annoyance upon his features. There was a flutter of feet and then Astoria spied Daphne's curious little face peeking in from a crack in her slightly ajar bedroom door. Her bedroom was mostly shades of green with the occasional pink. It was already beautiful but Astoria noticed new ornaments and features there that weren't before.
"She wasn't in the woods. She asked to go play and then I found her asleep on the clovers with all the dew all over her. It had wetted her dress and clothes and everything. She fell asleep not even a few metres into the trees bordering the wheatfields, and she keeps going on about how they're not so small and like a big enchanted forest to her!" Daphne quickly explained.
"I went deeper than that!" said Astoria. Her voice felt dry. She glanced outside her window and saw the night sky, pitch black. Had it really been almost half a day that she had been...asleep? Even her naps were shorter than that...
"Mum! She likes to pretend it's a big enchanted forest when it's really not and she doesn't even go far everytime she goes out there to play! She's just going to get herself sick, catch a cold, and then get everyone sick! I don't even get why she plays in the forest so much! What about the front or side gardens? They're nice!" said Daphne.
"Daphne is right! You will get sick, and everyone will catch it! Don't go out in the woods until you are old enough!" said her mother.
"How old?" asked Astoria.
"You will know when I tell you!" her mother snapped.
"We were actually worried you may be sick..." said her father.
"About to call my private healer! Almost..." said her mother.
Astoria felt bad. "I'm sorry..."
"I know you didn't mean it..." Astoria's mother said. Her father patted her on the head as if he was satisfied with the telling of and then slunk of back to his 'business', something he did that took up a lot of time and meant he couldn't talk to his family members as much even though he was physically in the house.
Daphne turned and ran of. "Dad! I don't go to the back woods because I know there's wolves and stuff there! I never thought it was a good place!" Daphne's voice echoed.
"There are no wolves there. Even if they were, they won't get past the warding enchantments put here," said Astoria's dad.
Their voices got lighter and lighter as their conversation followed them.
"But we really don't want to get a scare like that again..." Astoria's mother gave her a further telling of and told her to come for supper when she was ready. They had saved some for her and also that they happened to buy a few items they thought she might like from the store that day and had placed them in her room. Astoria thanked her quietly.
When everyone had left she collapsed on the bed, feeling...tired, relieved, happy, and yet...?
She checked her finger on the left hand. Nothing...not even a scratch...
She felt tired. Like she had slept for a century and the moments of her life she spent so long salivating over were just eras of the past. She frowned and tried to remember what had happened in her recent life...
Fairies...playing around in fairyland...a promise...and then...
"Daphne's right," she said, "I got bored of my life here. And sick and tired of Daphne...so I invented some stuff. I'll just have to learn how to deal with Daphne better and I guess...I guess my imaginations just reflected what I wished to be true. That I could have an utterly magical experience, and that I really do love the way beautiful things look in the wizarding world and yeah, in the magazines mum has of the muggle world they're not bad either..."
"It's just a dream..." she said.
The next few years were so ordinary Astoria did not once think of the dream again. It lay forgotten, like a pebble that sank to the bottom of a pond. Easily forgettable.